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Duke of URL
2006-12-19, 07:57 AM
Omer Ikahn Etch-Pressed Gift Card

Originally designed by the Lawful Evil accountiwizard Omer Ikahn, who was looking for a way to separate the gullible from their money more quickly, these small, flat, rectangular items are made from an unknown and somewhat flexible material. The secret etch-pressing process imbues the cards with a special magic that allows them to be given a certain value by those with the proper devices to do so, and to retain information about that value. In some locales, these cards are used in trade situations is lieu of physical currency -- a merchant who accepts the card will subtract the value of goods and services provided from the card's balance.

Given its thinness and moderate flexibility, the card may be employed at any time to provide a +2 circumstance bonus to an Open Lock check; however, the user may not take 10 or take 20, and a natural 1 will render the card useless.

While not particularly fragile, the card does not react well to direct bludgeoning, piercing, slashing, fire, acid, and/or electrical damage.

The card is redeemable for merchandise or services only unless prohibited by law. The card may not be used to make payments on any account or for prior purchases. The card will not be replaced if lost or stolen and will be void if altered or defaced. By using the card, you accept these terms and conditions.

Faint Transmutation, faint Evil; Non-craftable; Price special*; Weight negligible


* The card has no inherent value beyond its use as an improvised lock pick; it's value is set to its current balance, though there's no guarantee anyone will pay full value for it

Notes

While clearly a humor/pun item, a clever GM may use this in several ways to add a twist, surprise, or plot hook for the players. For example:


An NPC gives cards instead of actual coins, gems, or other items as a reward. Surprisingly, the cards are actually useful as trade currency. However... the PCs must travel to location XYZ to actually be able to use the cards, only certain vendors accept them, and oh, by the way, did the PCs read the fine print about the 2% per month "inactivity fee" if the card isn't used at least once within 90 days?

Duke of URL
2006-12-20, 11:17 AM
SAMPLE PLOT HOOK

:redface: Thank you, kind adventurers, for helping me with my apparently inconsequential, yet overwhelmingly difficult side quest.

:roy: It's what we do.

:redface: Well, I'll be on my way now...

:belkar: What??? Where's the reward you promised? I'll cut your lungs out, you...

:durkon: Steady, lad.

:roy: Much as I hate to admit it, Belkar has a point. You did promise to pay us for this.

:haley: Money!

:redface: Oh, right... um... [rummages in sack]... here, take these.

:roy: What the...?

:belkar: I have an idea... it starts with "st" and ends with "ab his eyes out"

:durkon: You've pretty much used th' exact same joke before, laddie.

:belkar: So what? As long as it works, I'm going to milk it for as much as I can.

:redface: No, really, they're valuable...

:vaarsuvius: I do sense a faint aura about them.

:haley: Magic items?

:elan: Hey... I recognize those... you give them to merchants and they give you stuff for them.

:haley: Money!!!

:vaarsuvius: I have never seen currency like this.

:elan: It's only used in Coastal City.

:redface: They're worth quite a bit, but I can't go back there due to an unfortunate incident involving the mayor's daughter, a stick of butter, and a rather poorly-chosen conjuration spell.

:roy: It is on our way to Girard's Gate...

:elan: Yea! Side trip!

Duke of URL
2006-12-20, 11:48 AM
:redface: ==> :sabine: Well, that should keep them busy for a while.

:nale: Excellent. With the Order Of The Stick wasting their time trying to get anything useful with those cards, we are free to go to Girard's Gate to wait for Xykon and see what he's up to. Then, once I have the power of the Snarl in my hands, I can deal with the Order Of The Stick and my traitorous brother Elan at my leisure.

:sabine: Yes, sweetie, I know. I helped make this plan remember?

:nale: I can't help it... I have a compulsion to provide massive amounts of exposition regarding my upcoming plans.

:sabine: *sigh*

:thog: thog likes exposition!

:nale: Since when did you start actually caring what the overall plan was, as opposed to just your part within it?

:thog: prison change thog.

Duke of URL
2006-12-20, 11:55 AM
:roy: Okay, then... there are, coincidentally enough, exactly six of these cards, and each one is supposed to be worth the same amount. So everybody gets one.

:elan: How did you figure that out?

:durkon: Just trust 'im, laddie.

(Each member of the party takes one card. Unbeknownst to them, they are being trailed by Miko, who, naturally, mistakes the slightly evil aura emanating from the cards -- and have you ever seen a gift card that wasn't at least somewhat evil? -- for the party's own auras...)

:miko: Detect evil! Ha! I knew it! I don't know how they fooled me before, but in addition to all of their other crimes, this proves their guilt without question!

Duke of URL
2006-12-20, 12:03 PM
(Xykon backs away from the widescreen scrying device)

:xykon: With the Order Of The Stick, the remains of the Linear Guild, and that annoyingly uptight paladin off to Girard's Gate, it's time to head off to Kraagor's Gate.

:mitd: Gate? What gate?

:roach: Geez, try to stay with the program for five seconds, will ya?

:redcloak: Wait... after they foiled you yet again at Azure City, you're just going to let them go?

:xykon: As pleasing as it would be to crush them and have their undead forms serve me, I can do that after I control one of the gates.

:mitd: What are these gates you keep talking about?

:roach: *sigh*

:redcloak: But what if Nale manages to figure out how to use the gate he's heading to before we get to the northlands?

:xykon: :redcloak:

:xykon: I hate heroes and their self-fulfilling prophecies. Fine, off to Girard's Gate, then.

:mitd: Gate?

:xykon: :redcloak: :roach: *sigh*

Peregrine
2006-12-29, 12:11 PM
I know you said right off that they were originally designed by a Lawful Evil wizard, but I still snickered when I got to the 'faint Evil' bit. :smallbiggrin:

And nice, err, 'plot hook' there. I can see it in my head as a full OotS comic...

Duke of URL
2006-12-29, 02:42 PM
I know you said right off that they were originally designed by a Lawful Evil wizard, but I still snickered when I got to the 'faint Evil' bit. :smallbiggrin:

Yeah... "faint Evil" was a late addition, but I grinned wickedly as I added it. :belkar: