Implementing character concept (weak Monk//Totemist)

[danzibr]

Backstory:
I'm running a high-powered gestalt game at the moment. We meet every weekend via Skype. This semester I have something like 23 hours (teaching 5 classes, taking 2), so I asked to alternate weekends by having someone else DM a different campaign. Ultimately we're going to DM the same campaign. Basically it'll be my campaign but two of the players will tag team making mini-quests.

One of the players (my wife) is playing a Cleric//Astral Deva. I want to make a character who would be interested in her character and potentially her character would be interested in.

However, I had a problem in a recent campaign with the same group. They're not optimizers. At all. I made a Psion/Constructor which was waaaaaaaay too strong, and to be honest it wasn't even very optimized, at least by GitP standards. So I really need to reign it in.

Also, the party (currently level 3):
Factotum//Wizard anthropomorphic monkey
Pixie//Cleric
Warblade//Soulknife Warforged
Fighter//Druid Elf
Cleric//Astral Deva
Basically, I want to make an unoptimized gestalt character with a free LA +1 which an Astral Deva could be interested in romantically. I'm thinking the following:

Monk//Totemist, taking Totemist all the way on the right, going into some janky yet flavorful Monk PrC, like Tattooed Monk. Also, VoP. Yes, VoP. I can't have access to magic items for the sake of reining it in. And for the Monk stuff I'd do the ACF which makes 'em good at grappling.

For race... undecided. Not Half-Minotaur, no, that would be bad. And I want to avoid pounce.

What I'm really looking for is this: Any suggestions on flavorful yet not potent race and/or the other side?

[Metahuman1]

Well, I'd start with before taking VoP grabbing that location that gives you 1/day turn undead form manual of the planes. Then pick up the cheapest location that grants feats and retrain it a few times into extra turning and grab travel devotion.

If you wanna grapple make sure you've got Garrillion Arms (Or how ever that's spelled.) and I'd look at the feats in Savage species and get the line that builds off grappling multiple opponents.

Beyond that, La 1 options I'd consider are Goliath or Draconic Creature Template on a human.

If you don't mind loosing a monk level and want to shift away from grappling, I'd personally suggest half fey form the Feindish Codex books and pick up Shiba Protector for one level + that feat from book of exulted deeds that gives you Wis to hit. Maybe invest in learn martial maneuver + Learn Martial Stance + Shadow Blade Strike from Tome of Battle and really dump str.

Stone Power, also from Tome of Battle, might also be worth a look either way just as a thing to make you harder to kill.

Last, Mage Slayer line is always worth a look. With out pounce, Thicket of Blades stance, Stand Still and/or Improved trip and a Reach Weapon it's not in and of itself optimized, but it is helpful.

[Greenish]

I've always liked Killoren (RoW) and Spirit Folk (OA, UE).

[RogueDM]

I've always liked Killoren (RoW) and Spirit Folk (OA, UE).

So much fun.

Aasimar/Tiefling could be good for just a dash of flavor. Uldra, from Frostburn. Catfolk from Races of the Wild if your Deva-Wife is into that sort of thing.