A Tea Party For The Post Apocalypse II (IC): Truth and Beauty

[Thanqol]

A man without tea in him is incapable of understanding truth and beauty

- Okakura Kakuzo


A Tea Party For The Post Apocalypse

IC Thread 1 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=287952)
IC Thread 2 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?318780-A-Tea-Party-For-The-Post-Apocalypse-II-%28IC%29-Truth-and-Beauty)
OOC Thread 1 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=285974)
OOC Thread 2 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=310372)
OOC Thread 3 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?347128-A-Tea-Party-For-The-Post-Apocalypse-III-%28OOC%29-Hope)


A HREC mission to speak to the survivors of Vault 73 turned out to be a Republic of Bear ambush. The battle was looking nasty right up until the Pegasus Enclave intervened, burying the stable and surrounding mountain under an immense snowstorm. Now the survivors of the HREC expedition are trying to make their way home, navigating an Arctic wasteland that was lethal even before the world ended...

[Thanqol]

This is the story of a pony named Black Box.

Black Box worked for the Ministry of Peace in a big building where he was employee number 427. Employee number 427's job was simple. He sat in the archive room of the library and whenever one of the real researchers gave him something to file, he catalogued it, sorted it, and placed it in the archive where it needed to go. This is what employee number 427 did every day of every month of every year. And although some may have considered this job soul-rending, Black Box relished every moment that the filing came in. His cutie mark had been made exactly for this job. And Black Box was happy.

However, Black Box had a problem. A dark and secret problem he never dared to speak of to anypony else at the Ministry of Peace for fear that he might lose his job. For the Ministry of Peace worked on some extremely classified material, you see, and if he was to admit that he heard voices - voices which had no earthly origin - he'd surely be fired, or worse, reported to the Ministry of Morale.

And it wasn't just one voice, either. Black Box heard five voices. They even had names - Lavender, Trees, Blue, Rosemary and Gabriel. They talked to each other, and they talked to him. Sometimes they told him what to do, sometimes ordering and sometimes sweet-talking. If they wanted to they could make life really unpleasant for Black Box, which made make him act strangely, which he really couldn't afford to do - especially when the Ministry of Morale Happiness Inspector was present and was already giving him funny looks. So sometimes, if it wasn't too much trouble, Black Box obeyed the voices.

He hoped that didn't mean he was crazy.

"Hello Mr. Box!" said the Lyrabot by the door as it spotted his security pass (displayed prominently as per regulations). It held the oak door open for him. "Welcome back to the Ministry of Peace!"

[the_druid_droid]

Lavender was still getting used to the idea of being inside another pony's head. She could intellectually grasp that the weird magic around the building must have had something to do with it, but the feel of it was still strange.

Also, she felt a little bad for Black Box himself. It was a pain dealing with two personalities; five sounded almost unendurable. Actually, counting her own issues, did that make it six? It probably wasn't a good idea to dwell on it - what they really needed was to find a way back out of... wherever it was they were.

At least no one was shooting at them right now.

"Hello, robot." Lavender said to herself, and Black Box, she supposed.

[Thanqol]

"Hello robot," said Black Box. Even if he was insane at least his voices were reminding him to be polite.

The robot seemed a little bit pleased at being acknowledged; it was a sightly endearing feature. "Is there anything I or my colleagues can assist you with today, Mr. Box? We are a bit understaffed because Ms. Tinkertech decided to repurpose a few of us for surgery, but if there's anything you need we'll see to it as fast as possible!"

[BlasTech]

"I don't suppose they have a chemical diagnosis lab." mused Rosemary. "There has to be a reason we're here, of all places. Maybe it was something he ate?"

Rosemary's voice was thoughtful. Heck, one could say that she was thoughtful given that there really wasn't much more to her anymore than her voice.

It had taken some getting used to. But, hey, if she had to be reduced to something akin to a symptom of schizophrenia, at least she still seemed to be in good company.

[Thanqol]

"That's a great point!" said Black Box.

"Sir?" said the Lyrabot.

"I-I uh, mean, there are chemical analysis labs here?"

"Of course! State of the art! We are the Ministry of Peace after all."

"So, uh, if I was to give you a blood sample could you... check it for contaminants?"

"Oh my! For what? Changeling venom? Taint mutation?"

"N-no, it's uh, for my, uh I want to find out if that Flim Flam Cider I drank yesterday was legit or not."

"Oh!"

"I want to know if I can sue them or not."

"A fine motivation!" said the Lyrabot, jabbing Black Box with a syringe-extension and sucking out a bunch of blood. "I'll let you know the results as soon as they come in."

"Heh, yeah - this is just between us, right?"

"Of course! I am programmed to treat Robot-Patient confidentiality as my highest priority!"

"G-good."

"I promise not to tell anypony unless somepony reprograms me to not have that inhibition!"

"That's, uh, sort of comforting I guess."

"Have a lovely day, Mr. Box!" said the Lyrabot.

Black Box made to walk past it and into the lobby.

[Balmas]

"As far as places go in the wasteland," Gabriel mused, "there are a lot worse. So, Box, or do you prefer Black? What say we head up to the office and see what files we have to catalogue today?"

[Thanqol]

"As far as places go in the wasteland," Gabriel mused, "there are a lot worse. So, Box, or do you prefer Black? What say we head up to the office and see what files we have to catalogue today?"

Black Box headed up to the office.

The lobby was fairly large; two staircases and lots of doors, with the demeanor more of a museum than a hospital. From just how different it was from all the prefab construction outside Black Box had assumed they'd found this building in the snow and fixed it up. Like a hermit crab.

He heard the forced chuckling that indicated the Happiness Inspector's presence from down his usual route - even the sour-faced Administrator Insubordination Kicker had to twist her mouth into a smile when he was present - so he went upstairs to take the long way around. Unfortunately, this meant that he'd have to go past either the office of Deep Blue, who was only the smartest and most attractive pony ever, and every second in her presence was a chance for him to screw up massively - OR he could go down the surgery corridor, which had the problem of being the Celestia-damn surgery corridor.

[Tiki Snakes]

"It doesn't matter which way you go, Box." Trees stated evenly. "Because the robot has your blood now."

She didn't say anything else for a moment.
"The only thing keeping it from coming back and helping itself to the rest is a tiny little box, just under it's cold metal skin. Truth is, there's nothing in a robot's heart but murder and lies."

"Just how much longer do you think the Inhibitors are going to be able to keep them in check, huh?"

[Thanqol]

Black Box decided that of all the crazy voices in his head, this one was the worst. He stood still, eyes closed, and took some deep breaths and hoped it would shut up.

[BlasTech]

"That certainly is a little ... dark, isn't it Trees?" chided Rosemary's voice.

[Tiki Snakes]

"That's the unvarnished truth, Rosemary." Trees snapped sullenly. "I should have let Gabriel shoot that Lyrabot when we had the chance."

"Heck, we should have smashed that AI core too! We had it right there in our hooves and there was nothing it could have done to stop us. But no, I had to be an idiot and believe it's corny lies about wanting to find it's long-dead friends! Who knows how many ponies it's hurt by now? We gave it a bucking rocket launcher!"

"I've learned my lesson, never trust a robot. You hear me Boxxy? Don't you trust a word they say!"

[Balmas]

"I dunno, Trees," Gabe said. "'Murder and lies'? There's nothing in a robot but what ponies put in it. If there's murder and lies, it's because the pony who made it had death on the mind."

He sighed. "Still, moving away from the potentially murderous bit of technology would be a good idea, I think."

[Thanqol]

Black Box didn't understand the robot hate, but he was really worried about it. Robots were all over this complex, working in every department, and were usually really nice to him. If the voices in his head had a problem with the robots it was going to get really awkward for him really fast.

But never get in a fight you could avoid, that was his motto. Deep Blue's corridor had less robots than the surgery corridor so that was the way he went. This was the part of the building that was focused on Megaspell research and only the absolute cleverest unicorns and sorcerers worked here. There seemed to be some sort of dress code for genius unicorns - drab tweed, bored expressions, and cutie marks depicting some kind of astrological phenomena. His own magical talents were rather pathetic and his cutie mark was a featureless orange cube on his dark grey flank, so he just kept his head down and tried to make it obvious that he was just the help.

There were chalk boards and posters and things in the corridor but he normally didn't look at them because they were so complicated they just made him feel dumb and unworthy.

[the_druid_droid]

He heard the forced chuckling that indicated the Happiness Inspector's presence from down his usual route - even the sour-faced Administrator Insubordination Kicker had to twist her mouth into a smile when he was present - so he went upstairs to take the long way around. Unfortunately, this meant that he'd have to go past either the office of Deep Blue, who was only the smartest and most attractive pony ever, and every second in her presence was a chance for him to screw up massively - OR he could go down the surgery corridor, which had the problem of being the Celestia-damn surgery corridor.

"Oh no, we are not going down that surgery corridor. No way, no how!" Lavender was starting to panic a little as residual images of the place drifted through Black Box's mind and bumped into her. Too many of her own memories were like that, usually from the other side of the glass.


"It doesn't matter which way you go, Box." Trees stated evenly. "Because the robot has your blood now."

She didn't say anything else for a moment.
"The only thing keeping it from coming back and helping itself to the rest is a tiny little box, just under it's cold metal skin. Truth is, there's nothing in a robot's heart but murder and lies."

"Just how much longer do you think the Inhibitors are going to be able to keep them in check, huh?"


"That's the unvarnished truth, Rosemary." Trees snapped sullenly. "I should have let Gabriel shoot that Lyrabot when we had the chance."

"Heck, we should have smashed that AI core too! We had it right there in our hooves and there was nothing it could have done to stop us. But no, I had to be an idiot and believe it's corny lies about wanting to find it's long-dead friends! Who knows how many ponies it's hurt by now? We gave it a bucking rocket launcher!"

"I've learned my lesson, never trust a robot. You hear me Boxxy? Don't you trust a word they say!"

"Leave him alone! Just because you got cut up a little you suddenly hate all of them? Please..."


Black Box didn't understand the robot hate, but he was really worried about it. Robots were all over this complex, working in every department, and were usually really nice to him. If the voices in his head had a problem with the robots it was going to get really awkward for him really fast.

But never get in a fight you could avoid, that was his motto. Deep Blue's corridor had less robots than the surgery corridor so that was the way he went. This was the part of the building that was focused on Megaspell research and only the absolute cleverest unicorns and sorcerers worked here. There seemed to be some sort of dress code for genius unicorns - drab tweed, bored expressions, and cutie marks depicting some kind of astrological phenomena. His own magical talents were rather pathetic and his cutie mark was a featureless orange cube on his dark grey flank, so he just kept his head down and tried to make it obvious that he was just the help.

There were chalk boards and posters and things in the corridor but he normally didn't look at them because they were so complicated they just made him feel dumb and unworthy.

Lavender breathed a sigh of relief as they turned down the corridor housing Deep Blue. She was feeling so relieved in fact that she wanted to do something to reward Black Box.

"Hey, if you want to, you should look at those boards. I know, or well, one of me knows a lot about that kind of stuff. I can tell you what it means, and then you won't have to feel bad!"

[Tiki Snakes]

"He's not even real, Lavender." Trees muttered quietly. "Either this is a trap, or we didn't make it and this is Pony Hell."

[Thanqol]

Black Box took the suggestion and looked at the board.

There were pictures of Fluttershy, the Minister of Peace captioned with the words 'Thank you so much for all your hard work', 'WEAR YOUR SECURITY PASS' warnings illustrated with a pony cornered by the shadows of angry robots, and various cartoons with incredibly complicated punchlines unintelligible to anyone who didn't have a degree in dimensional metaphysics. But the chalkboards, where passing researchers casually collaborated on major formulae, were where the science was really happening.

There was necromancy on these boards. Lots and lots of necromancy. Generalist magicians trained by HREC would have been trained to recognise the symbols that denoted necromancy and clearly told 'DO NOT CAST ANYTHING WITH ANY OF THESE' and given no further information. If anypony had seen a Baelfire Egg during their time in the Crystal Empire it would have been marked with some of the same symbols, as would highly irradiated locations. As a result, a lot of these equations meant virtually nothing to the scientists in Black Box's head.

However, the equations themselves were fairly recognisable. If they were able to get their hooves on a basic guide to the symbols they'd be able to figure these things out in far more detail.

[Deadly]

"Griffon's got a point," Blue's voice said somewhere within that great big space of Black Box's mind, filled with voices like stars. "I like that guy."

"Big surprise," Blue's voice responded somewhere else, a roll of metaphysical eyes. "What are you even doing here?"

"Beats me, dweeb. Just hangin' around, I guess. When you've been around as long as I have, you stop worrying about details like why the *yay* you're suddenly inside some guy's head with a bunch of strangers."

There was silence. "Whatever," Blue said finally. "I'm loathe to say it, but Trees' got a point. Whoever thought it was a good idea to give a scrapheap of jagged metal a hoofful of weapons was out of their minds."

"She would agree with the totally-hot earth pony, you know," a third Blue interjected with an invisible wink.

"Hah." Invisible claws were bumped.

"*yay* you, Gilda!"

"Sorry, dude, I'm not really into ponies."

Blue groaned and changed the topic. "Where are we going?"

[BlasTech]

"He's not even real, Lavender." Trees muttered quietly. "Either this is a trap, or we didn't make it and this is Pony Hell."

"I certainly hope our company is not that tormenting to you, Trees." deadpanned Rose.

The unicorn's voice fell silent again whilst Resonant's three (three!) voices bickered with one another. It certainly seemed as if there was more going on in that pegasus' head than she'd originally believed.

"Unfortunately, I can't make head nor tails of the equations. So, unless you can see a book labelled 'A beginner's guide to necromancy - Foals edition', we may as well continue on to his office for now."

[Balmas]

"We can't be in hell," Gabriel snarked. "My dad's not here."

Then Blue started talking. And she started talking again, and a third Blue joined in. Three voices, one of whom liked him. Gabriel wasn't sure which fact surprised him more. Or which was more disturbing.

"I don't suppose that Pre-War Equestria actually published A Foal's Guide to Necromancy, did they?" muttered the griffon. "'One of your friend's suffered an accident? We can help!'"

[the_druid_droid]

"He's not even real, Lavender." Trees muttered quietly. "Either this is a trap, or we didn't make it and this is Pony Hell."

"That doesn't give you permission to be cruel, and you know it." Lavender seemed firm on this. She was willing to hurt and even kill ponies if she had to, but there were things she would not do, nor sit by and watch.


However, the equations themselves were fairly recognisable. If they were able to get their hooves on a basic guide to the symbols they'd be able to figure these things out in far more detail.

"Shoot. That all looks pre-war to me. I can tell you it's dangerous stuff for any unicorn to cast, and where I'm from everyone's scared of it. If you can find me a dictionary or textbook, I might be able to actually translate it into something meaningful... Sorry."

[Thanqol]

Black Box let his eyes drop back onto the carpet and started walking again. Necromancy? He only knew about necromancy from old pony tails, ghosts and goblins and stuff. Nothing serious. Nothing real. He supposed it was probably not polite to judge a pony like the Minister for Peace based on an old story he'd heard one time with a bad guy necromancer, so he'd just assume that the smart ponies knew what they were doing.

One of the doors was ajar, leading into a meeting room. Black Box's ears twitched when he heard the voices coming out of it.

"I honestly don't know what B-Wing thinks they're trying to accomplish. We're not going to find a solution for necromancy in a chemical vat."

"I'm sure that's not what they're doing. Chemists aren't idiots, they don't just throw random stuff into expensive containment vats and take notes on what happens. They get the theory damn perfect before they start mixing - and we know they don't have the theory because we haven't thought of it yet."

"I don't think our solution is going to involve a giant pot of orange tang! We're dealing with the primordial force of creation here, you can't immunize against that with a pill."

"I sense the Ministry of Morale's hoof at work here, to be honest. There's no other explanation."

"Urgh. Are they turning this top secret anti-armageddon research facility into a meth lab? I wish I was surprised."

Black Box noticed he was eavesdropping, and hurried himself forwards.

[Deadly]

"Why don't we ask him what he knows?" one Blue suggested. "Like, what is this place anyway?"

"More like, when is this place," another Blue suggested.

"Right."

[Balmas]

"Who are you, anyway?" came Gabe's voice. "Blue, Blue, and the third Blue? Is there noone here who's sane?"

[the_druid_droid]

Black Box noticed he was eavesdropping, and hurried himself forwards.

"So, who were those guys?" Lavender was kind of curious about all this; there was something about it that made her think of a giant memory orb of some kind, and if it was anything like that, she might actually be able to learn something during her stay here.

If she could get enough pieces to make a puzzle, anyway.

[BlasTech]

"Who are you, anyway?" came Gabe's voice. "Blue, Blue, and the third Blue? Is there noone here who's sane?"

"Probably not". sighed Rosemary's voice. "Sanity went extinct along with common sense a long time back."

"Back to the matter at hoof though, if this facility is a research facility it would be interesting to understand more about what they were trying to achieve."

[Thanqol]

"Why don't we ask him what he knows?" one Blue suggested. "Like, what is this place anyway?"

"More like, when is this place," another Blue suggested.

"Right."

"Ministry of Peace Mt. Shayoshant research center," muttered Black Box under his breath. "Year 1227 post-Discord."


"So, who were those guys?" Lavender was kind of curious about all this; there was something about it that made her think of a giant memory orb of some kind, and if it was anything like that, she might actually be able to learn something during her stay here.

If she could get enough pieces to make a puzzle, anyway.

"Tinpenny and Mental Leap," said Black Box. He knew them, they came by the archive from time to time. "Researchers, and important ones."


"Probably not". sighed Rosemary's voice. "Sanity went extinct along with common sense a long time back."

"Back to the matter at hoof though, if this facility is a research facility it would be interesting to understand more about what they were trying to achieve."

"The Ministry of Peace's job -" said Black Box, and then closed his mouth hard when he saw a door open. He relaxed a bit when it was just a Lyrabot, which waved chirpily as it drifted past. "- is to end the war. It's the Ministry of Peace after all."

He froze up a bit when he saw a door ahead with the name 'Deep Blue', slightly ajar. Several plans presented themselves - walk past quickly, walk past slowly, wait for a distraction, dive dramatically across, turn around and walk back through the entire building to avoid going past that door, knock on the door confidently and assertively and ask her out (haha). It was a tough call.

[Balmas]

"At a guess," Gabe mused, "I'd think we're still at the hospital. We, us, our bodies I mean. This... Dammit, I miss having hands. We're probably seeing what made the hospital the way it was."

He paused at the Box's hesitation. "You know," he wheedled, "I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you just, poke your head in, right? Say hello, be friendly-like?"

[BlasTech]

"The Ministry of Peace's job -" said Black Box, and then closed his mouth hard when he saw a door open. He relaxed a bit when it was just a Lyrabot, which waved chirpily as it drifted past. "- is to end the war. It's the Ministry of Peace after all."

"Don't remind me." sighed Rosemary. "I was referring to the specifics of the research here, however."



He froze up a bit when he saw a door ahead with the name 'Deep Blue', slightly ajar. Several plans presented themselves - walk past quickly, walk past slowly, wait for a distraction, dive dramatically across, turn around and walk back through the entire building to avoid going past that door, knock on the door confidently and assertively and ask her out (haha). It was a tough call.

"You may as well actually ask her, you know." She observed. "If you don't, you'll just be stuck never knowing."

"Besides, the world could end tomorrow. Wouldn't it be better to resolve this while you still have the time?" she finished, voice melencholy.

[Deadly]

"Who are you, anyway?" came Gabe's voice. "Blue, Blue, and the third Blue? Is there noone here who's sane?"

"What did you drink or smoke?" Blue said, her words glaring at Gabe.

"Who cares? I want to know if he's sharing or what," a second Blue said. "Name's Gilda, by the way, and the other griffon over ... thereabouts, that's my sister Evelyn."

"How pleasant to meet you all here," the third Blue said, mild sarcasm detectable.


"You may as well actually ask her, you know." She observed. "If you don't, you'll just be stuck never knowing."

"Besides, the world could end tomorrow. Wouldn't it be better to resolve this while you still have the time?" she finished, voice melencholy.

"Listen to the unicorn, that's my advice," Gilda said.

[the_druid_droid]

He froze up a bit when he saw a door ahead with the name 'Deep Blue', slightly ajar. Several plans presented themselves - walk past quickly, walk past slowly, wait for a distraction, dive dramatically across, turn around and walk back through the entire building to avoid going past that door, knock on the door confidently and assertively and ask her out (haha). It was a tough call.

Lavender could feel Black Box's confused feeling whirl through her own head. It was painfully obvious how much he liked her, and how unworthy he felt. The whole thing was slightly... exciting?

"Ooh, what's she like? Is she sweet? Smart? Pretty? Is she nice to you?"

[Thanqol]

They'd closed ranks, the traitors, and were all trying to shove him in through that door. Well... maybe they were right! Maybe he should do something about it! Now, before it was too late!

He strode confidently through the door. He froze when he saw Deep Blue look up from her desk at him.

For all that buildup she wasn't actually that pretty. Six out of ten, maybe. Dark blue unicorn with a black vortex cutie mark. Completely absorbed in her reading. But either way, Black Box locked up like a Stable's front door.

"... yes?" she said after a moment.

"C-coffee?" Black Box choked out.

"Oh. Yes, milk and two sugars please," she said, looking back down to her paperwork without a second thought.

Black Box turned in place and walked right on back out of that door.

ARGH

WHAT WAS THAT

He'd just become a coffee maid because he was too dumb to say otherwise.

ARGH

He chose carefully an unoccupied stretch of wall - didn't want to disturb anything important - and hit his head against it.

And now if he went down to the break room to get her the coffee, he'd be late to his desk and if he was late and the Administrator found out about it he'd be in serious trouble, and even THEN he'd be forgotten as one of the robots...

Black Box hit his head against the wall again in the hopes that it would distract him.

[Tiki Snakes]

They'd closed ranks, the traitors, and were all trying to shove him in through that door. Well... maybe they were right! Maybe he should do something about it! Now, before it was too late!

He strode confidently through the door. He froze when he saw Deep Blue look up from her desk at him.

For all that buildup she wasn't actually that pretty. Six out of ten, maybe. Dark blue unicorn with a black vortex cutie mark. Completely absorbed in her reading. But either way, Black Box locked up like a Stable's front door.

"... yes?" she said after a moment.

"C-coffee?" Black Box choked out.

"Oh. Yes, milk and two sugars please," she said, looking back down to her paperwork without a second thought.

Black Box turned in place and walked right on back out of that door.

ARGH

WHAT WAS THAT

He'd just become a coffee maid because he was too dumb to say otherwise.

ARGH

He chose carefully an unoccupied stretch of wall - didn't want to disturb anything important - and hit his head against it.

And now if he went down to the break room to get her the coffee, he'd be late to his desk and if he was late and the Administrator found out about it he'd be in serious trouble, and even THEN he'd be forgotten as one of the robots...

Black Box hit his head against the wall again in the hopes that it would distract him.

"Ugh. This is pathetic. You realise that right?" Trees moaned. "You need to have more self respect, Box."

"You have options here, pick one and bucking commit to it. Either you walk your dumb flank back in there and tell her great, milk and two sugars? I'll pick you up after work. Or you tell her you don't have time right now, how about tonight?"

"Or you forget about the whole thing, write her off as ignorant and get on with your life. If you can't look her in the eye and talk like an equal then you can never have a healthy relationship with her because you'd be ceding far too much power."

[Balmas]

"What did you drink or smoke?" Blue said, her words glaring at Gabe.

"Who cares? I want to know if he's sharing or what," a second Blue said. "Name's Gilda, by the way, and the other griffon over ... thereabouts, that's my sister Evelyn."

"How pleasant to meet you all here," the third Blue said, mild sarcasm detectable.

There was a rustle of paper, and sharp rasp of a match on a box. "Gilda..." Gabe mused. "I knew a Gilda back in the stable." A second cigarette tapped out. "Aaand, one for you. Bit of a bitch when she got to the bar. Made it easy to start fights.

"And for once, I'm gonna have to side with Trees. Either buck up or forget it. Better yet, go and do your job."

[BlasTech]

Thump.

Huh. Odd. That had almost sounded like a unicorn smacking their head onto something solid. That ... shouldn't have been possible.

[Thanqol]

Okay. Okay. Deep breath. Let's try this again. One more time. The voices in my head are right, I wouldn't be able to live with myself otherwise. Deep breath. Okay. Let's go.

He walked in the door, closed his eyes, and blurted out "I REALLY LIKE YOU!"

"Uh -"

That was not Deep Blue's voice.

"Thank you, I guess?" said Administrator Insubordination Kicker, who had just walked into the room to chat with Deep Blue. The Administrator was an old battleaxe of a pegasus with a deep, husky voice from years of chewing out recruits on the parade grounds.

"YOU ARE WELCOME," said Black Box.

"I AM GOING NOW," he continued.

"GOODBYE," he said, stepping out of the door and walking so rapidly and robotically that most ponies assumed he was some sort of experiment.

He was heading rapidly towards his office, brain still utterly frozen. The voices had free reign up there.

[Tiki Snakes]

"This is without a doubt, the worst prison ever." Trees grumbled.

[the_druid_droid]

Okay. Okay. Deep breath. Let's try this again. One more time. The voices in my head are right, I wouldn't be able to live with myself otherwise. Deep breath. Okay. Let's go.

He walked in the door, closed his eyes, and blurted out "I REALLY LIKE YOU!"

"Uh -"

That was not Deep Blue's voice.

"Thank you, I guess?" said Administrator Insubordination Kicker, who had just walked into the room to chat with Deep Blue. The Administrator was an old battleaxe of a pegasus with a deep, husky voice from years of chewing out recruits on the parade grounds.

"YOU ARE WELCOME," said Black Box.

"I AM GOING NOW," he continued.

"GOODBYE," he said, stepping out of the door and walking so rapidly and robotically that most ponies assumed he was some sort of experiment.

He was heading rapidly towards his office, brain still utterly frozen. The voices had free reign up there.

Lavender tried very hard to restrain her giggles. That had not quite gone the way she had expected, but she was still curious about the unicorn Black Box had a crush on. She hadn't seemed very exceptional, or even very kind, but there must be something there.

"Black Box? How did you meet Deep Blue?"


"This is without a doubt, the worst prison ever." Trees grumbled.

That brought her mood down again. "Trees, for your own sake, I hope you never find out how wrong you are."

[Tiki Snakes]

That brought her mood down again. "Trees, for your own sake, I hope you never find out how wrong you are."

"I'm not sure I am wrong on this one. I mean, brutal guards? You can rail against them. Oppressive, inescapable isolation? Create your own internal fantasy or obsess over plans to escape. Torture with no hope of escape? Bash your own brains out against the wall. Invasive and unnecessary medical procedures? Hate the doctors till everything else melts away. Some magic wibbly wobbly thing that eats your memory? Death of the personality is indistinguishable from death of the self."

She reeled off the scenarios, without having to so much as pause to think.

"But this? Trapped in an existentially uncertain limbo where you can't ever be sure you're not just an idea in somepony's head, trapped in a bodyless void with the only point of reference being the voices of ponies you used to know, unsure if any of you are still alive or ever truly lived? That's pretty bad." She paused for emphasis. "But the fact that the only outside frame of reference is some ineffectual little wet blanket of a pony, trapped in some kind of half hearted romantic comedy scenario? You can't even really define yourself by opposition."

She would have shrugged, if she had a body anymore. As it is, she didn't say anything for a moment before adding in a small voice.

"Damn this gentle hell."

[BlasTech]

"Cogito ergo sum - I think, therefore I am." replied Rosemary, stirring from her silence to quote Descoltes.

"To put it more applicably; the fact I am able to think of myself as an entity seperate of this colt's mind proves I exist. I remember things. Too much to just be somepony's psychotic manifestation. Things from my foalhood, things from my travels, things that have never existed outside my head."

"You might be a figment of my imagination, Trees. But I'm confident that you can recall things like that too. Things from before we met? Certainly, things from before we got here."

[Balmas]

Gabriel all but inhaled his cigarette, he was laughing so hard. "Well, at least she got the right idea about you," he chortled. "I hope you'll invite us to the wedding."

And then everyone else got morose on him. Couldn't they see the humor? Come on, perfectly good situation to laugh, and they go on about hell and Descoltes. "We're here," he said simply. "My bet's is on necromantic magic, and if I spend eternity in here... well, it'll be a crappy time for all. And somehow, I don't think I'm a figment."

[the_druid_droid]

"Death of the personality is indistinguishable from death of the self."

"You think it's so clear cut? That something happens, then it's over, then you're free?" Lavender's voice was soft and small. "I wish."

[Thanqol]

Black Box's insanities were arguing and being depressed; his regular thoughts were much the same. He didn't have much space to ruminate, though, and just shuffled down the corridor to his office.

He opened the door and slumped behind his desk. The Ministry of Peace archives were surprisingly small - only about four book cases - but there was some INCREDIBLY restricted stuff here. Books made out of leather (bletch), or with bones or evil symbols or glowing crystals and various other evil-looking exteriors. Even the normal looking ones were normal in creepy ways. There was a connected room full of filing cabinets where he logged, stored, and filed every report that came in from elsewhere in the office. The idea, he supposed, was that whatever research the Ministry of Peace did was so dangerous that they did NOT ever want to do the same test twice.

Just as he was typing in his terminal password (d4ffodils) he heard a voice from the doorway. A lot of voices in this place made him fearful or skittish but only one made him groan in resignation.

"Hey hey, B-B!" said Master Plan, swishing her tail as she walked in.

Master Plan was a foalhood friend of his and she'd always been enigmatic, manipulative and insufferable. She was a light blue earth pony with a sandy brown mane and tail and a cutie mark of a golden pyramid. There had been jokes that since they'd got their cutie marks at right about the same time and the marks had looked vaguely similar that they were ~destined to be together~. More like, he was destined to be manipulated into an endless sequence of menial tasks while she swanned around and reaped all the rewards.

In fact, one day Black Box fully intended to give her a piece of his mind.

"Hello, welcome back to the archives Ms. Plan. What can I get for you?"

That day was not today.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Cogito ergo sum - I think, therefore I am." replied Rosemary, stirring from her silence to quote Descoltes.

"To put it more applicably; the fact I am able to think of myself as an entity seperate of this colt's mind proves I exist. I remember things. Too much to just be somepony's psychotic manifestation. Things from my foalhood, things from my travels, things that have never existed outside my head."

"You might be a figment of my imagination, Trees. But I'm confident that you can recall things like that too. Things from before we met? Certainly, things from before we got here."

What? No, that's not..." Trees reacted with confusion at Rosemary's response. "...You didn't understand, did you? You didn't understand at all."

Trees went quiet for a moment.

"You should be nicer to Master Plan, Box." Trees suggested half heartedly, before retreating back into silence.

[Deadly]

"Just bloody stop moping," Blue said to Trees. "You didn't have a problem when Mr. Weird told you you're just a figment of his imagination, yet for all we knew he was right, though. For all we know he was also wrong, so why *yay*ing worry about it? You can't tell either way, so might as well pick the answer you like best and roll with it."

"Or, you know, it's just the weirdest dream," Gilda said somewhere. "Maybe you're all the product of that stuff I ate last night at this festival thing. I knew I shouldn't have trusted that weird little bug-eyed guy."

"I'm actually the Last Queen of Griffons," her sister opined. "Did you know that she had long discussions with the voices in her head and wrote it all down in a series of books taking up an entire aisle in the royal library? That's what this is. It's a classic piece of historic writing. I don't believe anyone has ever read the whole thing."

"I think we should show a little respect for our poor, tortured host. And if this is the past," Blue said, ignoring the griffons who had her voice, "perhaps our actions might affect history itself, so caution might be good too."

[BlasTech]

What? No, that's not..." Trees reacted with confusion at Rosemary's response. "...You didn't understand, did you? You didn't understand at all."

Trees went quiet for a moment.

"You should be nicer to Master Plan, Box." Trees suggested half heartedly, before retreating back into silence.

"... I suppose I did not ..." said Rosemary's voice, before lapsing back into silence.



Just as he was typing in his terminal password (d4ffodils) he heard a voice from the doorway. A lot of voices in this place made him fearful or skittish but only one made him groan in resignation.

"Wait... what? That ... could that be? ..." whispered Rosemary. Her voice was quiet, as if she only meant to talk to herself, but in their current situation such attempts at privacy were a moot gesture.

[the_druid_droid]

"Wait... what? That ... could that be? ..." whispered Rosemary. Her voice was quiet, as if she only meant to talk to herself, but in their current situation such attempts at privacy were a moot gesture.

Lavender's insubstantial ears pricked at that. "You mean about what Gem told you? Yeah, that might be it..."

[BlasTech]

"Hmph." hmph'd Rosemary, as she considered the implications.

"You there, Black Box. Tell me, why is your password Daffodils?" she commanded.

[Thanqol]

"I chose it because -" said Black Box aloud, totally cutting off Master Plan as she opened her mouth to speak.

She gave him a weird look. He flinched and closed his mouth.

"I was actually going to ask you some questions," said Master Plan after an uncomfortably long moment.

"Oh yeah. Sure," be nice to Master Plan. "What do you need?"

"First, my book!" said Master Plan, picking up her workbook off the shelf. Employees weren't allowed to take those creepy things home for obvious reasons. "Secondly, I've got an experiment I'd like your help in particular with."

"Me? Why me?" said Black Box, equal parts afraid and confused.

"Because of your special talent. You're the only pony around here with something like it," said Master Plan brightly.

"What, organizing?" said Black Box blankly. Master Plan looked offended.

"Organizing? Organizing? Your special talent is not organizing!" said Master Plan, stomping forwards aggressively. "How do you not know this?"

"B-but I'm in charge of filing and -" Black Box said meekly.

"Do you know how I know? Because MY special talent is organizing!" said Master Plan. "I know everypony's special talents and how they all work together! And I know for a fact that your special talent is not, and never has been organizing and I don't know how you did not know this."

"Then what is it?" said Black Box haplessly. Master Plan facehooved, took a deep breath, and then asked:

"What colour were the placemats at May Blossom's fourth birthday party?"

"Green and white with embroidered white doves," said Black Box instantly.

"And what did you have for breakfast this day fifteen years ago?"

"Celery and carrot stew," said Black Box.

Master Plan gave him a 'how can you be this dumb' look. Black Box flushed and squirmed in his seat.

"It's remembering you dolt! Your special talent is remembering things!"

"I thought that was the same thing as organizing!" Black Box argued pathetically.

Master Plan sighed. "Just... get up to Chamber Three as soon as possible," she said, and turned to leave.

[Tiki Snakes]

"She just corrected you on a major misunderstanding. You now understand yourself, at least a little better." Trees pointed out quietly.
"Say thank you. And mean it."

[Thanqol]

"She just corrected you on a major misunderstanding. You now understand yourself, at least a little better." Trees pointed out quietly.
"Say thank you. And mean it."

"Thank you," said Black Box, and hoped he was meaning it hard enough.

Master Plan flicked her tail and gave him another slightly weird look as she made to leave.

[Balmas]

"Knowing the Wasteland, we're probably stuck in the memory of a grotesquely mutated Black Box," grumped Gabriel. "Just you watch. We'll come to in the hospital with a thirty-foot tall mess of mutated pony. So, let's go see what horrors the MOP has for us. Box, you'd better do what she says."

[the_druid_droid]

Oh, no. Thought Lavender. Then it struck her that Black Box could probably hear her thoughts just as well as her words.

"I think I might have been right before..."

But that wasn't the most important thing right now. "Black Box, can you finish explaining about your password? I think we might need to know, eventually."

[Thanqol]

"Knowing the Wasteland, we're probably stuck in the memory of a grotesquely mutated Black Box," grumped Gabriel. "Just you watch. We'll come to in the hospital with a thirty-foot tall mess of mutated pony. So, let's go see what horrors the MOP has for us. Box, you'd better do what she says."

Urgh. Black Box pretended he hadn't heard that.


Oh, no. Thought Lavender. Then it struck her that Black Box could probably hear her thoughts just as well as her words.

"I think I might have been right before..."

But that wasn't the most important thing right now. "Black Box, can you finish explaining about your password? I think we might need to know, eventually."

"To remind me of something," said Black Box gruffly, and didn't seem inclined to elaborate. He hurried up and made his way up the stairs to Chamber Three.

Chamber Three was a megaspell firing chamber. It looked kind of like the inside of a disco ball, all shining silver panels and curiously shaped rainbows. He was relieved to see that Master Plan was alone there - there wasn't really that much danger in a megaspell silo if he was the only unicorn staffing it - but she did have some sort of weird contraption device thing with her. Like a silver crown next to a box of wires and stuff.

"Hey hey!" said Master Plan. "Ready to get started?"

"Does this, uh, involve any necromancy?" said Black Box, looking uneasily at some of the symbols on the device.

"Of course it does. What do you think we do here?" said Master Plan, rolling her eyes.

"I don't particularly want to be a zombie or have my soul eaten -"

"Black Box, what do you think necromancy is, exactly?"

"Uh -" said Black Box. A bunch of nasty stories and a law against it's practise, mostly.

"Necromancy isn't zombies and evil. That stuff can be done perfectly fine with regular magic," said Master Plan. "Necromancy is very simple: It's the art of Permanent Change. It's a change that cannot be undone, a spell that cannot be unwoven. A good example might be Celestia's Sun; a permanent addition to the world."

Black Box flinched. That sounded awfully blasphemous to him. "I'm still not sure I want to let you go about permanently changing me -"

"You'll be fine," said Master Plan dismissively. "I'm just going to copy a period from your memory using totally normal magic and then store it in something necromantic. The idea being if your memory is as good as I think it is - if it really is perfect - then just maybe the people in your memory will be real people as well."

"Huh?" said Black Box, lost.

"Think about it! You go and meet an elderly sage briefly before he dies. But if I'm right, and we visit your memory - properly stored and treated - we might be able to ask him different questions each time we do it over!" said Master Plan. "It'd be less like viewing something through a recollector and more like time travel."

"I guess... I guess I can see how that'd be really useful," said Black Box.

"Then what are you waiting for? Put on the big crown thingie and let's get on with it!" said Master Plan brightly.

[Deadly]

Blue frowned, as much as a disembodied voice inside your head could frown. It might be more like a low, disapproving noise. "Wouldn't you have to experience the sage's whole life and all his thoughts to make the memory actually real, as opposed to just a brief meeting where most of the memory is probably about the room and what he looked like? Unless your special talent also includes mind reading and divination of the past."

"This plan sounds like complete and utter horse apples," she concluded.

[BlasTech]

"This plan sounds like complete and utter horse apples," she concluded.

"Unfortunately ... it doesn't seem quite so implausible from this side of the pony's skull." said Rosemary, her voice resigned.

[Thanqol]

"Unfortunately ... it doesn't seem quite so implausible from this side of the pony's skull." said Rosemary, her voice resigned.

There were problems with the plan, plenty of stuff to argue with, but the essential question was 'Does Black Box remember, even on an instinctual level, what another pony's soul looks like?'

If the answer was 'yes' then the plan might work. She was no expert on necromancy, and that was the sphere of souls, but if you had a perfect replica of a pony's soul then it was entirely possible you'd have a perfect replica of the pony's entire life. There were a thousand kinks and bugs related to storage and sustaining that she couldn't even guess at the answers to but this didn't seem to strike her as impossible. So yes, if Black Box's memory was PERFECT (and not just very good) this was possible.

Also the fact that it seemed pretty likely they were stuck inside this exact spell as she'd described it made it seem pretty likely that this paid off somehow.

[Deadly]

"Unfortunately ... it doesn't seem quite so implausible from this side of the pony's skull." said Rosemary, her voice resigned.

"Except that'd mean he remembers ponies he hasn't met yet," Blue said.

[BlasTech]

"Except that'd mean he remembers ponies he hasn't met yet," Blue said.

"He's not remembering us." Clarified Rose. "We're remembering him."

[Deadly]

"He's not remembering us." Clarified Rose. "We're remembering him."

Blue mulled it over ... "So you're saying all his memories, everything about him, gets stuck inside a box forever, perfectly preserved for the ages so that ponies can talk to him and ask him questions? That's absolutely despicable."

[Balmas]

"Ask about how they're going to do it," urged Gabriel.

[the_druid_droid]

Blue mulled it over ... "So you're saying all his memories, everything about him, gets stuck inside a box forever, perfectly preserved for the ages so that ponies can talk to him and ask him questions? That's absolutely despicable."

"That's why this place is the way it is... with all the weird magic. They didn't just preserve Black Box, they mummified the entire building, and they did it so completely a megaspell couldn't erase it." The realization felt strange. She could connect the pieces together, but it was like the chain of logic was flowing into her head from elsewhere; that was why she got nervous talking about magic. But this was special. It was important.

"Like I said, I feel like we're basically inside a giant memory orb. One you don't need a horn or some arcanotech to access. One that's interactive."

[Thanqol]

"So it's a time loop!?" blurted out Black Box in response to the voices in his head.

Master Plan froze.

"You haven't ever said that before," she said quietly, softly. She took a step forwards. "In over a hundred thousand cycles you've never even come close to that thought before. I've gone through the exact motions I needed to and you've said something unexpected, so what's different? What's changed?"

Her eyes lit up, silver-teal tattoos starting to glow, making her visage look profoundly alien. Black Box felt his knees get weak and mouth go dry. This wasn't natural. Something about that magic felt profoundly wrong, he didn't remember it at all.

[the_druid_droid]

"Black Box? What kind of magic do you do?" Urgency was creeping into Lavender's voice as the pony opposite them began to glow.

She had been wrong. Wrong in one suddenly-critical detail. It was possible that not everything in this experience was just like a fancy memory orb. It was possible that something here was alive.

[Thanqol]

"Black Box? What kind of magic do you do?" Urgency was creeping into Lavender's voice as the pony opposite them began to glow.

She had been wrong. Wrong in one suddenly-critical detail. It was possible that not everything in this experience was just like a fancy memory orb. It was possible that something here was alive.

"Uh. Light! Telekinisis! Organize! Arcane Mark! Teleport Object! Come to Life!" said Black Box frantically as he started to back away from Master Plan. She came forwards, tilting her head from side to side, as if she just needed to look at him from the right angle.

"You're taking inventory in a crisis, something you've never done previously," murmured Master Plan. "That rules out a few things. It means that the change isn't with me, it's with you. You've given a few other odd reactions this morning too. Which means that it's most likely the case that somepony has blundered into the spell effect, somepony calm and composed who's trying to out-think me. Not the first time a visitor has come by but the first time I've had one capable of rational thought..."

Black Box was seriously freaking out about literally everything right now. He wished this Celestia-damn sphere-room had a door he could just run at.

[the_druid_droid]

"A few suggestions? One - do you see anything you can teleport onto her head? Two - I don't know how much control we have suddenly, but can you remember a door, even if there wasn't one? This is all in somepony's head, after all, and maybe you can do something about that.

Three - can you understand this?"

With that, Lavender began walking through the steps to cast an Arcane Blast mentally, without actually bringing the spell to completion. There was a slim chance that having somepony in his head focus on magic might help Black Box along in trying something new, or maybe she could cast through him?

Holding back her side of things while trying to concentrate on magic was starting to give Lavender a headache, but this had gone from important to really important, so she could afford to whine later.

[Thanqol]

Black Box shot a bright orange bolt of arcane energy directly into Master Plan's face. He screamed much louder than she did, closed his eyes, and started running blindly, too panicked to focus on Lavender's other questions.

"Luna's bloody tongue!" swore Master Plan. Black Box dared to open his eyes for just long enough to see her covered head-to-hoof in glowing silver-teal arcane sigils (http://img577.imageshack.us/img577/7730/6kx7.jpg), forming the most relentlessly complex total-body tattoo he had ever imagined. There was so much magical power there that his horn seriously, badly hurt just being close by.

The others would remember that there had been a door they'd come in through, but it had closed seamlessly and given Black Box's panicked eyes-closed running and spinning it'd was impossible to say where it currently was, and the only teleport-able-object was the big crown thingie with the recorder table.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Black Box, you are panicking. That's okay, but you need to stop. So imagine a fire." Trees calm voice cut through the chaos. A tiny little fire burning strong in the darkness. You put something in there and it'll burn it up and it'll be gone."

"Got it? Good." she said encouragingly. "Now we're going to take all that panic and fear, roll it up and throw it in the fire. We don't need it right now. Lets let it feul our fire instead, burning hotter in the still and the dark of your mind."

"And if you would be a dear, apologise for listening to lavender. You didn't mean to shoot your friend in the face after all. Tell her sorry, and that we should talk."

[Deadly]

"I'm not sure I share Trees' optimistic suggestion that we can simply apologize and talk our way out of this," Blue said darkly ... in the dark. "But the 'don't panic' and 'fire' thing? That's good advice. Just be ready for anything, 'cause I doubt an apology will work."

[the_druid_droid]

"And if you would be a dear, apologise for listening to lavender. You didn't mean to shoot your friend in the face after all. Tell her sorry, and that we should talk."

"Trees, that thing is covered in glowing magical writing and just admitted to keeping Black Box in the place you've been calling Hell for the last few hundred years. It also knows more necromancy than anything sane has a right to. It is not anyone's friend."

On the bright side, that'd proved she could still sort of use magic, even while inside somepony else's head.

"The point about panic is good, though. Deep breaths, Black Box."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Lavender, you are a magical idiot." Trees sighed.

"I keep telling you, Black Box isn't...look, that doesn't matter." she cut herself off, conscious of who was listening. "Black Box doesn't do anything different without prompting, thousands of loops of the same events, without our prompting. I don't want to say it, but do the math filly."

"Master Plan isn't the prison guard, Lavender. She's the prisoner. The only prisoner here other than us."

[the_druid_droid]

"Master Plan isn't the prison guard, Lavender. She's the prisoner. The only prisoner here other than us."

"No, she's a walking megaspell. You do not make friends with a megaspell. I don't know if you've ever actually seen necromantic magic go off; actually I haven't ever seen it myself. But I heard stories at HREC. If all they do is permanently meld you to a wall, you count yourself lucky."

[Tiki Snakes]

"If the mega-spell talks back, you bet your butt you make friends with it! I mean, what kind of dingbat intentionally makes an enemy out of a walking talking mega-spell?"

"She's a pony. She's trapped. She's probably our only way out. Screw the magical ethics and meta-physical ramifications of a glowy earth pony. Screw them! I want to hear what she has to say!"

[BlasTech]

"Quiet!!" Rosemary's raised voice cut through the bickering. "Fighting this way gets us nowhere fast."

"Master Box, you may as well ask her what she's going to do to you, and what she wants." she instructed. "Knowing our luck, it likely won't be good for us, but use that time to look at the walls and we'll see whether we can spot the door out of here."

[Balmas]

"And if that doesn't work, try to think of somewhere to hide," said the griffon. No guns, and he didn't really know any magical spells. Real surprise there. "That'll give us time to figure out what's going on and what to do about it."

[Thanqol]

"Black Box, you are panicking. That's okay, but you need to stop. So imagine a fire." Trees calm voice cut through the chaos. A tiny little fire burning strong in the darkness. You put something in there and it'll burn it up and it'll be gone."

"Got it? Good." she said encouragingly. "Now we're going to take all that panic and fear, roll it up and throw it in the fire. We don't need it right now. Lets let it feul our fire instead, burning hotter in the still and the dark of your mind."

"And if you would be a dear, apologise for listening to lavender. You didn't mean to shoot your friend in the face after all. Tell her sorry, and that we should talk."

Okay. Okay. Imagine a fire. And imagine everything you're afraid of balling up and tossing onto that fire. I can do that. I can do that.

Black Box's horn glowed. Literally everything in the room caught fire. Black Box began to suspect that this room had something to do with amplifying unicorn magic.

And then a flaming Master Plan punched him in the face. He went down like a sack of potatoes.

"Bastard," she hissed into Black Box's face, fire burning the edges of her mane, as she kept her hoof on his throat. "You think you can kill me that easily? In the time I've spent in here I've mastered Solar Style, Lunar Style, Fallen Caesar Style and Still Hoof style. I've fought and killed every pony in this entire building several times over. And you are bound to a milquetoast unicorn who can't even manage fifteen pushups. I know every variable and there's nothing that you can do to surprise -"

The wall of the casting chamber opened up and Black Box saw a bright green robot float inside. "Hello, Mister Box! I have the report back on your blood test and turns out you're A-OK!" It paused as it surveyed the flaming tableau before it. "I should probably report this to the Administrator," it said thoughtfully, and rapidly floated out of the room.

Master plan groaned, punched Black Box in the gut hard enough to drive all the wind from his lungs, threw him overhoof out of the burning room to land painfully in the corridor, and then sprinted past, chasing the robot in a blur of baelful necromantic energy.

Black Box lay there feeling sorry for himself.

[Tiki Snakes]

"You should feel sorry for yourself! You just literally failed at imagining!" Trees was very nearly speechless.

"You know what? You're awful at talking. Maybe you should find a pen and paper and we can write a letter for Plan explaining everything?"

[the_druid_droid]

"If the mega-spell talks back, you bet your butt you make friends with it! I mean, what kind of dingbat intentionally makes an enemy out of a walking talking mega-spell?"

"She's a pony. She's trapped. She's probably our only way out. Screw the magical ethics and meta-physical ramifications of a glowy earth pony. Screw them! I want to hear what she has to say!"

"I AM-"


"Quiet!!" Rosemary's raised voice cut through the bickering. "Fighting this way gets us nowhere fast."

"Master Box, you may as well ask her what she's going to do to you, and what she wants." she instructed. "Knowing our luck, it likely won't be good for us, but use that time to look at the walls and we'll see whether we can spot the door out of here."

She had been going to say I am a glowy Earth pony, but then Rose cut in and she'd choked on the words. Was she, still? Or was she something else?

And anyway, that didn't matter now. What mattered was that they were in trouble, and they needed to find a way out of it fast.

"Can we feel sorry for ourselves and run at the same time? Because we need to move, to change something up. And while we're moving, you really need to explain that password to us, Black Box. I think it's important to all this too!"

[Deadly]

"Hey," Blue said to Black Box. "Don't feel bad. And don't you dare listen to any bloody neighsayers who tell you to feel bad because you didn't win the whole world on your first try. You know when you've failed? You've failed the moment you give up, and not one god-damned second before! So pull yourself up right now, take a deep breath, raise your head up high and stare the world right in the face as you tell yourself that you're not going to take any *yay* from anyone! You're going to figure this *yay* out, and we're here to help you do it. You got that?"

[Balmas]

"Sitting around on your plot won't help," the griffon spat. "You need to get somewhere safe. Where can you go that she can't?"

[Thanqol]

There was a huge explosion from down the corridor.

"THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO TALK ABOUT MY COMPUTER PASSWORD!" screamed Black Box, getting to his hooves and galloping at full speed in the other direction. Red lights and alarms were starting to wail all through the facility and blast doors were starting to slowly descend, cordoning off various sections of the hospital. "THIS IS THE TIME FOR RUNNING AND POSSIBLY SCREAMING," he said in what he thought was a quite reasonable tone of voice given the circumstances.

He arrived in the lobby just as the door sealing off the research building from the outside slammed into place. Nuts.

[Balmas]

"What are you waiting for?" The flabbergasted griffon stared out of Black Box's eyes. "You have magic. You can teleport. Get OUT of here!"

[the_druid_droid]

"THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO TALK ABOUT MY COMPUTER PASSWORD!"

"It absolutely IS! You said it was to remind you of something, and this whole thing is because of your memory. Every memory is important right now, and we can't help you otherwise!" Lavender would have looked to Rosemary for backup on this, but considering they were all stuck inside another pony's head, looking anywhere but where Black Box looked was extremely difficult.

[Thanqol]

"What are you waiting for?" The flabbergasted griffon stared out of Black Box's eyes. "You have magic. You can teleport. Get OUT of here!"

"I know Teleport Object, not Teleport!" said Black Box in the whiny voice of somepony who'd explained this before. He thought he might be able to teleport maybe if he really tried but he'd always been too afraid to try it because what if he screwed it up?


"It absolutely IS! You said it was to remind you of something, and this whole thing is because of your memory. Every memory is important right now, and we can't help you otherwise!" Lavender would have looked to Rosemary for backup on this, but considering they were all stuck inside another pony's head, looking anywhere but where Black Box looked was extremely difficult.

"Argh, okay! I met the Minister of Morale one time and she gave me a bunch of daffodils and told me not to be such a frowner-downer! It's a stupid story anyway!" said Black Box, "what I really should be doing is -"

A single well-placed buck struck one of the parts of wall where the containment wards were just a little too weak.

The wall exploded into the entrance hall, pelting the bystanders with rocks.

A bloody and scorched Master Plan strode out onto the top of the stairs. Then she seemed to remember something and took a single step backwards. Blazing teal eyes scanned the room, but if Black Box had one merit it was that he'd taken cover the moment she'd walked in and was hiding behind a pillar, heart pounding.

[BlasTech]

"... She didn't kill us" muttered Rosemary, distractedly.

Realising there was no way to keep such musings private, she decided to elaborate for the benefit of the others.

"For all her hoof-to-hoof prowess, Master Plan didn't kill us when she had us at her mercy earlier. It suggests she still wants something from you, or perhaps from the rest of us."



A single well-placed buck struck one of the parts of wall where the containment wards were just a little too weak.

The wall exploded into the entrance hall, pelting the bystanders with rocks.

A bloody and scorched Master Plan strode out onto the top of the stairs. Then she seemed to remember something and took a single step backwards. Blazing teal eyes scanned the room, but if Black Box had one merit it was that he'd taken cover the moment she'd walked in and was hiding behind a pillar, heart pounding.

"Why isn't she entering?" asked Rosemary, safe in the knowledge that there was no way for Master Plan to overhear her.

"Is there something about this room we should be aware of?"

[Tiki Snakes]

"Tell me more about the Minister of Morale, Black Box." Trees asked quietly. "What was she like?"

[Deadly]

"I don't think he should say a peep right now!" Blue warned. "Or hiding from the angry, bloody madmare will prove rather pointless. Hold your breath and wait until she moves on." She probably didn't need to tell Black Box that last part, but did it anyway.

[Balmas]

"Well then, teleport something into her! Shove a pot into her head. A bit of rebar. Hell, teleport her into the wall!" Why was this hard? "She's an earth pony, and you're a unicorn. If nothing else, you should be able to just hold her off."

[Tiki Snakes]

"You're both crazy, but at least Blue is the kind of crazy that isn't actively trying to get us killed again." Trees grumbled.

"Alright, stay hidden then. Stay quiet. But we're in your head, Box. So you don't have to speak for us to hear you. Just try to stay calm, and think real hard about the nice pony who gave you some daffodils. Show us with your thoughts, Black Box."

[Thanqol]

There was a complicated decision-making rubric Black Box followed in response to the voices in his head. If they all agreed on something, if they were extremely insistent on something, and most of all if they were advising something that didn't sound like it'd get him killed. Remaining hidden took the cake here so he held his breath and tried not to think too loud.

After a couple of seconds, he heard Master Plan storm off into the building and there were more crashes and explosions.

"From the sounds of it," muttered Black Box, "she's currently taking out unicorns a lot more skilled than me so I'm not optimistic about my chances in hoof-to-hoof combat. I don't know anything about this room, it's just the entrance lobby, though somepony once fell down those stairs and cracked her skull," the stairs had a traditional lack of guardrails.

He started to creep slowly towards one of the side doors.

"It was before the war started, and she wasn't the Minister then she was just Pinkie Pie," said Black Box quietly. "She showed up on my birthday with like two dozen other ponies and basically partied-and-ran. She was probably really busy with something but she still took time out to hold a party for somepony she'd never met. Later she started building robots so she'd never have to miss a party again but it wasn't the same..."

He still didn't see how this was meant to help them.

"She did say 'see you later' like she meant it, though," said Black Box. "Even though she never saw me again."

[the_druid_droid]

"Ok, I don't know exactly how that helps us right now, but thank you, Black Box. Something in there has to be important. For now, we should probably just work on staying out of sight."

[Balmas]

Ugh. Worst unicorn ever. "Hiding just puts off the inevitable," Gabriel grumped. "But since I don't know what happens if someone kills you when I'm in here, and since you can't fight her... Well, I guess I can give you some tips... Stick to the shadows, or whatever colors best match your colors. Kind of hard to tell from in here. Don't just step like you normally do. Try to ease into each step."

[Thanqol]

Sneaking. All right. He'd read, like, every single Daring Do book and she sneaked around all the time. This should be easy. Sneaky-sneaky. Curve your hoof. Stick to the shadows. He had a dark grey coat, that was a shadowy colour. He could do this.

He was creeping through a brightly lit corridor into B-wing. There were no shadows. A robot sailed past; "Hello, mister Box!" it said cheerfully as it passed him in the other direction, heading towards the fighting.

He had no idea where he was going. He worked in the other part of the building; the part with all the necromancy and megaspell chambers and stuff that made sense. This evidently seemed to be the extra-creepy chemical storage sheds. Offices were filled with drums of toxic-looking chemicals with toxic-looking warning signs. Dirty offices had whiteboards covered with what looked like recipes more than formula. There was a seemingly endless quantity of glassware strewn about, packets of syringes, bottling operations and various other chemical apparatus. The unicorns from before had been right about the Ministry of Morale turning this part of the building into a meth lab. They'd probably been wrong about the 'chemists don't throw random things into vats' part.

He passed a room that was just one big scorch mark and shivered.

[the_druid_droid]

"So, does anyone else have any ideas for avoiding the necromantic pony-thing? Or thoughts on the password situation?" Lavender shivered a little herself, quietly hoping Master Plan would be distracted long enough for them to think of a way out.

[BlasTech]

If another minister was involved, and the minister of Morale herself, then I'm not sure we can discern the purpose of that information presently." replied Rosemary.

"As for avoiding Master Plan. While I agree in principle that it is probably safer to keep away from her, unless we can secure passage out of this facility then it's going to be a moot point."

"Master Box, do you know of any ways to exit this facility while in lockdown? Barring that, I suspect that if we are discovered, talking to Master Plan may be our only defence."

[Thanqol]

"Master Box, do you know of any ways to exit this facility while in lockdown? Barring that, I suspect that if we are discovered, talking to Master Plan may be our only defence."

"Sure, talking calmly to a girl when my life is on the line. I'm sure I won't feather that up," muttered Black Box under his breath. "And no, I'm pretty sure that when the lockdown goes off we wait inside until the Ministry of Arcane Technology teleports in some unicorns with hazmat suits."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Ugh. Just ugh." Sulked Trees. "Look, we all know perfectly well that the only way out of here is going to be with Master Plan. As facts go, it couldn't be more blindingly obvious if it had a neon sign pointing at it."

There was a silence that could possibly remind a listener of the general sensation of somepony pouting.

"And hey, it's not like Box's lady talky troubles are even hard to get around. Can't talk? Great. Grab a pen and paper and write it the heck down while we've got a quiet moment, or tell it to a recording device. And you know what? That is just as obviously a solution to his problems with that dippy moo we tried to talk to earlier as it is with Plan."

"But hey, who am I to speak? You all want to play Daring Do, great. Let's do that instead. Who knows, maybe when they get here, the plastic wrapped death-squad will be interested in talking. Maybe we'll actually get outside before then. Maybe, hear me out now, just maybe if we do get outside we won't find outselves looking at an endless black void stretching to infinity in all directions. Who knows? Certainly not me!" She would almost have been shouting, if she was sure that was even technically possible without lungs or a mouth.

"You know where to find me." She added quietly. Trees pictured a flower, it's petals curling up protectively in on itself into a tiny, protective bud. The outer leaves, hard like organic steel closed around it and the mind-presence of Trees was still.

[Deadly]

"Yeah," Blue said. "I think we'd all love to talk to her, except right now we don't know that she won't incinerate us on sight before Blackie here even gets a chance to open his mouth or present his carefully worded letter. We don't even know if she'd listen at all, or just open his skull and study his brain. If we're going to talk to her - and I bet Trees is right that we might have to - I strongly suggest we find a way to do so from hiding, at a distance, until we trust her not to do anything unfortunate to us."

"This place has some kind of communication system, right?" Gilda suggested. "Broadcast a message, or call some random phone and let her pick it up." The unbodied griffon shrugged. "Or whatever."

[BlasTech]

"Not a bad idea. If there is a PA system, its controls would likely be in the Administrator or Overmare's office. I believe that was someone called Insubordination Kicker?" added Rosemary.

[the_druid_droid]

"Not a bad idea. If there is a PA system, its controls would likely be in the Administrator or Overmare's office. I believe that was someone called Insubordination Kicker?" added Rosemary.

"The only issue is that if Master Plan has half a brain, she'll know where we are as soon as we start broadcasting. And for all we know, she can teleport." Lavender would have tapped a hoof, if she'd had anything to tap. "I kind of like the idea of a recorded message better. We could even play it over the PA system as a distraction."

[Balmas]

"There's got to be a way to record a message," Gabe mused. "Maybe back the way we came? A camera, something like that, back in the megaspell room that she was gonna use to watch what happened?"

[Thanqol]

Okay, this was the dumbest plan. He had to sneak through an exploding facility on lockdown and into the Administrator's office so he could leave a pre-recorded message to his psychotic demon friend in the hopes that something something time loop. Unfortunately, pretty much all the voices agreed on this point and they never did that.

He grumbled under his breath and started forwards through the chemical storage sheds. He made his way up onto one of the steel walkways (why the hay were there no guard rails, was this place powered by industrial accidents?) and started crossing the eerie tanks full of glowing liquids.

Some of them were filled with a fluorescent orange tang that looked suspiciously like garden variety post-apocalypse RadAway. Even the bottling section had containers that looked pretty similar. The significance was lost on Black Box, though, who headed straight across the hall and up the stairs towards the fourth floor door.

Where were the Ministry of Morale ponies, anyway? They were meant to work here.

[BlasTech]

"The place looks deserted." observed Rosemary, as they ran along.

"Keep an eye out for anything that might indicate where they've gone, or any clues as to what they were working on."

[the_druid_droid]

"The place looks deserted." observed Rosemary, as they ran along.

"Keep an eye out for anything that might indicate where they've gone, or any clues as to what they were working on."

"Well, that goo down below looks kind of familiar. Do you think it's really what it looks like?" Lavender didn't use RadAway herself, but she was familiar with the orange packets in every first aid kit.

[BlasTech]

"You mean like Rad-away?" replied Rosemary. "Yes. But it could just as well be some kind of orange juice based mutagen, so I wouldn't advise sampling it unless necessary"

[Thanqol]

Black Box legitimately could not fathom the point of RadAway. The only situation where it'd be useful would be after everypony was dead. It made sense that it was the Ministry of Morale behind it; it wasn't like anypony sensible would waste their time on a scheme like that.

He sighed and opened the door.

Confetti exploded in his face.

"HOWDY PARTNER!"

Black Box jumped back in shock, slipped on the catwalk, and nearly tumbled over the safety-rail-less side into the vat of orange goop. He clung on desperately to the catwalk but started to slowly slip anyway.

There was a smiling purple thing above him.

"Howdy! I'm Plum Tuckered, Ministry of Morale Smile Inspector! Gotta say it's a stompin' sheep to meet you mister! Sorry I'm late, according to this thing it's been -" Plum Tuckered raised his right forehoof which had a Pip-Buck on it. Not just any Pip-Buck either - that was unmistakably the same nightmare of wires, antennae and electronics that White Noise wore around. The only difference was that currently glowing pink instead of blue. "- seventy thousand and eighty one days after I was supposed to meet you!" Plum Tuckered laughed loudly. "Oh partner, this gizmo's got more bugs than the Changelings. That is, unless two hundred years passed without me noticin', wouldn't be surprised, would forget my head if I didn't need it to hold my hat. Let me help you up,"

The talkative purple earth pony finally offered a hoof to Black Box. Now, Black Box having a reasonable fear of the Ministry of Morale and a premonition that Plum Tuckered would never shut up ever for any reason, considered that maybe he should take his chances with the orange tang.

[Deadly]

"Are you seriously considering dumping yourself in a vat of unknown chemicals?" Blue groaned. "What is it with ponies and suicide?"

[Thanqol]

She was right, dumb idea. He took the hoof and struggled back onto the catwalk.

"Good boots there partner!" said Plum Tuckered, beginning what seemed like the start of a default state of talking. "I been lookin' for you, even if not for two hundred years. Hoped it was goin' to be under better circumstances than being chased by an angry megaspell but that's the way the sofa reproduces, am I right? It's all kind of academic since the world's apparently endin' today, which I have conscientious objections to let it be noted. Oh, don't look like that, it's too late to get in a Stable and, trust me, they're not all they're goosed up to be. Why this nice gentlecolt named Super Rich or somethin' gave me a free ticket to a Stable 73 just the other week and I walked in, take one look at the place, and walked right out. Phew-wee! Glad I dodged that bullet!"

It seemed that Black Box finally had a chance to get a word in edgewise, so whatever question he asked had better be good.

[Tiki Snakes]

Trees was far too busy being still and silent and small to rise to such bait. It wasn't like any of this was real or anything. She maintained her focus on the concept of a tiny steel flower bud and the protective passivity it stood for.

She would leave the others to deal with this.

[Balmas]

"Ooookay..." Random earth pony. Sure, why not? It wasn't like much of the rest of this was making sense, anyway. "Probably right about the Stable. Wasn't that one yours, Trees?"

Something was wrong here, and it wasn't just the giant vats of Radaway. Which he'd be coming back to loot, if he could.

[the_druid_droid]

"I think... this might be progress." Lavender was starting to feel like her wires were crossed. There was a kind of bleed-through in talking with this pony, between the Pip Buck and the two centuries comment.

"Black Box? Have you ever met this pony before? Do you recognize him at all?"

[Thanqol]

"I think... this might be progress." Lavender was starting to feel like her wires were crossed. There was a kind of bleed-through in talking with this pony, between the Pip Buck and the two centuries comment.

"Black Box? Have you ever met this pony before? Do you recognize him at all?"

"I've been avoiding him," said Black Box out loud, and then groaned when he realized what he'd done.

"Why the spoon-fed catfish would you do that?" said Plum Tuckered in surprise.

"Urgh - because you Ministry of Morale guys are creepy, okay?" said Black Box in frustration. Not like he wasn't going to be imprisoned and reprogrammed after today anyway.

"Creepy? How are we creepy?" said Plum Tuckered.

Black Box waved his hoof around the giant, creepy room full of giant, creepy chemical vats.

"That's a one off," said Plum Tuckered. "'sides, not the point. Now, I don't know the Minister of Morale personally but I'm of the impression she gets hunches so sharp you could prick a ostrich's boils with 'em, so when she sends me on a special mission to go to this base an' have a chat with you while wearing an experimental piece of military hardware an' on that exact day I do some sort of necromantic abomination flips out and wrecks everythin' then I ain't so simple as to ascribe that to coincidence."

"Yeah, I'm sure she saw it all coming," huffed Black Box. "It'd be nice if she could show up and explain what the hell is going on instead of sending some lackey who doesn't know anything."

That was perhaps the most outwardly assertive and aggressive he'd ever been. He didn't even feel ashamed at it, just crushed and disappointed.

"Aw, don't be like that. She's here in spirit," said Plum Tuckered.

"Yeah, I bet," muttered Black Box, shoving past him. "Come on, the voices in my head want me to go to the administrator's office."

[Balmas]

Gabriel frowned, trying to discern anything from the purple station's flank. Good at making some weird kind of pie? His pies made people happy? Cutie marks were abstract at the best of times, and somehow, being stuck in someone else's memory didn't fit that description.

"Ask where he got that Pipbuck," urged the griffon. If this pony had one, that meant that the one White Noise had probably wasn't a recent invention. Different colors... maybe for different ministries?

[Thanqol]

Gabriel frowned, trying to discern anything from the purple station's flank. Good at making some weird kind of pie? His pies made people happy? Cutie marks were abstract at the best of times, and somehow, being stuck in someone else's memory didn't fit that description.

"Ask where he got that Pipbuck," urged the griffon. If this pony had one, that meant that the one White Noise had probably wasn't a recent invention. Different colors... maybe for different ministries?

"What's with the thing?" asked Black Box.

"Oh, this contraption? Picked it up from that Mega Rich hombre. Ministry project, somethin' to do with Stable morale, outsourced to RichCorp like everythin' else that involves flashy widgets," said Plum Tuckered. "It's not the prettiest pepper pot in the gum tree, an' I'm not rightly certain why mister Rich gave it to me. I mean, it can't even get my name right, it keeps calling me Overmare -" he stopped.

"What?" said Black Box.

"Oh my stars and garters, I may have left that poor colt with the impression I was goin' down to the Stable he proffered me," said Plum Tuckered. "Perhaps even in some sort of managerial role. I suppose'n in retrospect I should have hoofed it over to that Blueblood chap when I decided that the Stable wasn't my cup of salted burlap." He looked down for a second, then perked right back up. "Oh well, no use crying over unevenly folded laundry!"

[the_druid_droid]

"Did this... Is this... really happening?" Lavender was starting to feel very confused. If what Plum Tuckered was saying had anything to do with reality, it might be important. Or it might be what happened when a necromantic memory loop went haywire. She wondered if Master Plan had ever seen anything like this in the previous iterations...

Not that she wanted to ask her about it.

[BlasTech]

"It certainly seems to be." said Rosemary, before 'turning' to address Black Box.

"Does he know anything about Stable 73? Its purpose or what it might have contained? Why didn't he stay there?"

[Thanqol]

"It certainly seems to be." said Rosemary, before 'turning' to address Black Box.

"Does he know anything about Stable 73? Its purpose or what it might have contained? Why didn't he stay there?"

"Where are we going?" said Plum Tuckered.

"Administrator's office, apparently," said Black Box. "Also, what was up with Stable 73?"

"Eh, something about the giant armoured bus full of convicted felons Britta'd me on the place," shrugged Plum Tuckered. "Just between you an' me, I think that the cats aren't all meowin' in StableTec HQ. But I think the Ministry has ponies lookin' into that,"

[the_druid_droid]

Lavender was quietly thankful the only Stable she'd ever been in was a decommissioned and renovated one.

"Can you keep Plum Tuckered talking? It's kind of nice to have somepony around who isn't glowing and trying to kill us, and maybe he can help us figure something out."

[Tiki Snakes]

Trees floated serenely in her own little imaginary bubble of stillness.
Stable 73? She thought, distantly. Now that's some ancient history.

Let the others stress and fuss. There was nothing she could do anyway, so she might as well do nothing.

There was a brief flutter of confusion when Trees realised her internal monologue had started up again and she wasn't entirely sure if her internal monologue was actually a private thing anymore, but she let that concern drift away as well and went back to being a flower.

[Thanqol]

Lavender was quietly thankful the only Stable she'd ever been in was a decommissioned and renovated one.

"Can you keep Plum Tuckered talking? It's kind of nice to have somepony around who isn't glowing and trying to kill us, and maybe he can help us figure something out."

"So, er, now that you're here at last what were you sent to talk to me about?" said Black Box, coming back to the obvious question.

"Oh!" said Plum Tuckered, having seemingly forgot about this. "Oh, right. The Minister of Morale said to tell you that she wants to meet you and could you come as soon as possible."

Black Box gave him a flat look. "But you said the world is ending today."

"Yep!"

"That the Minister of Morale supposedly knew about."

"Yep, she's the pony who told me!"

"And she was aware of the physical distance between me and her."

"Maybe, it's hard to tell with that one."

Black Box groaned; this was beyond useless. Maybe the colt was just insane because he didn't understand this at all.

The Admin office would be just around the corner.

[BlasTech]

"And she intended to meet you ... where?" asked Rosemary, dubiously, as they continued their run to the admin office.

She still hadn't noticed Trees' withdrawal from the conversation. One of the downsides of being a disembodied mental construct was that you found it hard to tell when someone was trying to be ferrous fauna unless they said something explicit or were silent for long enough.

[Balmas]

"Careful," Gabriel advised. "It's been quiet for too long. I'm just waiting for your 'friend' to jump out at us and horribly murder our face."

Of course, quiet and Plum didn't exactly mix. At best, they'd be lucky to wind the purple pony down to simply "talkative" instead of "jaw your ear off."

[the_druid_droid]

"I am getting a creepy feeling, and I don't think it's just all the necromancy hanging around." Lavender shivered, still a little disturbed by how off the rails things had gone. Spending a day or two in a boring office was a nice break from being shot at, but she'd had to kiss that goodbye far too soon.

"And please try to play nice with Plum Tuckered. If things really are going crazy, our best hope is probably to keep as much crazy around as possible. Master Plan doesn't seem to want it, at least."

[Thanqol]

"And she intended to meet you ... where?" asked Rosemary, dubiously, as they continued their run to the admin office.

She still hadn't noticed Trees' withdrawal from the conversation. One of the downsides of being a disembodied mental construct was that you found it hard to tell when someone was trying to be ferrous fauna unless they said something explicit or were silent for long enough.

"Where did she want me to meet her?"

"She didn't say and I didn't think to ask!"

*Facehoof*


"Careful," Gabriel advised. "It's been quiet for too long. I'm just waiting for your 'friend' to jump out at us and horribly murder our face."

Of course, quiet and Plum didn't exactly mix. At best, they'd be lucky to wind the purple pony down to simply "talkative" instead of "jaw your ear off."

Black Box was rapidly starting to think he wouldn't mind if they got found. This day was already about as awful as it was going to get. Either way, they'd just reached the Administrator's office and he shoved the door open and walked inside.

It was spartan, as Pegasus offices tended to be; just a desk, a microphone, and a filing cabinet. There was a nice skylight though. He didn't see any setup that'd let him record anything. On the plus side, since it was a magical microphone there weren't any wires or anything.


"I am getting a creepy feeling, and I don't think it's just all the necromancy hanging around." Lavender shivered, still a little disturbed by how off the rails things had gone. Spending a day or two in a boring office was a nice break from being shot at, but she'd had to kiss that goodbye far too soon.

"And please try to play nice with Plum Tuckered. If things really are going crazy, our best hope is probably to keep as much crazy around as possible. Master Plan doesn't seem to want it, at least."

"Max crazy, sure thing," said Black Box, looking around the office for hidden keypads or anything such.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Hey, wouldn't Plum's crazy pip-buck be able to record and broadcast?" Said Trees the meditative flower thoughtform.

[Thanqol]

"Hey, wouldn't Plum's crazy pip-buck be able to record and broadcast?" Said Trees the meditative flower thoughtform.

"Sure. Or I could take the microphone with me and talk to her from wherever I want in the building," said Black Box, picking it up with his magic.

"Hey, that's pretty weird," said Plum Tuckered.

"What?"

"This buiding's on lockdown, right?" said Plum. "Then why's there an open glass skylight right there?"

Huh. Black Box had looked at it but that hadn't even registered as a thing in his brain.

"Oooh," said Plum Tuckered, following a pink spark that danced on the edge of his nose. He gestured at some perfectly ordinary part of the desk. "There's a bomb strapped to this desk drawer! One of those new plasma ones, nice!"

"This is a trap," said Black Box, brain finally catching up with his perceptions.

"Yes, but not for you," came the weary voice of Administrator Insubordination Kicker from above as she opened up the skylight, holding a magical energy rifle in her mouth.

[Deadly]

"I think it would be really nice to know who's trying to kill who exactly in this crazy place!" Blue said suddenly, after a short silence.

[BlasTech]

"Indeed. Also, is there any way for us to get out of her via that skylight?" added Rosemary.

[Balmas]

Finally! A weapon! Though if what Master Plan had said was true, it wouldn't be much use. "She might be able to lift us out," said the griffon. "I'd like to know what exactly she's planning, though."

[the_druid_droid]

"I think I'm starting to feel a little better, actually. At least about the dying part. I'm still not positive how we get out yet." As much as she hated getting shot at, the sight of the energy rifle was comforting Lavender at the moment.

[Thanqol]

"I think it would be really nice to know who's trying to kill who exactly in this crazy place!" Blue said suddenly, after a short silence.

Black Box said the exact same thing.

"Trying to ambush the monster wrecking my facility," said the Administrator shortly. "Figure it'll come for my office. I intend to kill it or die trying."


"Indeed. Also, is there any way for us to get out of her via that skylight?" added Rosemary.

Black Box immediately said this as well.

"Sure," said Insubordination Kicker, spreading her wings to help them out.

"Wait wait wait. I came all this way to help you and you want to leave?" said Plum Tuckered in surprise.

"Well, yeah."

"But the bombs are dropping, like, this afternoon! All we're going to do is walk a little while and then blow up!" said Plum Tuckered.

"The bombs are dropping?" asked the Administrator sharply.

"I don't believe him either -" said Black Box. He wanted to get out of here and leave it to the military to handle, he was just a civilian and had no part in this nonsense...

[BlasTech]

"This afternoon? I wonder what time it is." mused Rosemary.

"Regardless, it would seem the only choices are to stay in here and probably die from a crazy killer pony, or to head outside and probably die from crazy killer zebra." she groused. "At this rate, you may as well just head back in, find that girl you fancied and give her a good kiss goodbye."

[Tiki Snakes]

"You all need to focus." Trees the implacable mote of existential beauty pointed out firmly. "Box, you came here for recording equipment. Not to blow yourself up. Not to crawl outside to get a better view of the end of the world. Not to run off again so you can freeze up in front of some silly filly."

Trees was stern, but weirdly neutral.

"If you really have feelings for Deep Blue, you should record them so she can hear your words when you aren't shaking so hard your brains leak out. And we want to get a message to your old friend. I honestly don't care what the administrator wants to do. Master Plan already knows what Kicker will do anyway."

[Deadly]

"Then perhaps we should consider making the administrator do something else, something unexpected and different, while we're at it," Blue suggested.

[Thanqol]

"This afternoon? I wonder what time it is." mused Rosemary.

"Regardless, it would seem the only choices are to stay in here and probably die from a crazy killer pony, or to head outside and probably die from crazy killer zebra." she groused. "At this rate, you may as well just head back in, find that girl you fancied and give her a good kiss goodbye."

Black Box blushed and muttered something vaguely defensive.


"You all need to focus." Trees the implacable mote of existential beauty pointed out firmly. "Box, you came here for recording equipment. Not to blow yourself up. Not to crawl outside to get a better view of the end of the world. Not to run off again so you can freeze up in front of some silly filly."

Trees was stern, but weirdly neutral.

"If you really have feelings for Deep Blue, you should record them so she can hear your words when you aren't shaking so hard your brains leak out. And we want to get a message to your old friend. I honestly don't care what the administrator wants to do. Master Plan already knows what Kicker will do anyway."


"Then perhaps we should consider making the administrator do something else, something unexpected and different, while we're at it," Blue suggested.

Yeah, that was a good point. "Hey, uh, boss?" said Black Box. "I'm like sixty percent certain we're trapped in a time loop."

Insubordination Kicker's expression went flat. "Explain."

"Well, the voices in my head -"

"Stop explaining."

"What I'm saying is that Master Plan probably knows exactly what you're going to do because she's Master Plan, so you should probably try a plan B."

"Understood," said the Administrator, reaching down to unplug the detonation trigger on the desk drawer. She started taking out glowing green grenades and attaching them to her armour.

"I need your broadcast microphone," said Black Box, picking it up.

"This too," said Insubordination Kicker, tucking a plasma grenade to his shirt. Black box froze in terror as he felt the slightly-warm explosive pressed against his chest. Insubordination Kicker checked her energy rifle and made to leave the room.

[the_druid_droid]

"This too," said Insubordination Kicker, tucking a plasma grenade to his shirt. Black box froze in terror as he felt the slightly-warm explosive pressed against his chest. Insubordination Kicker checked her energy rifle and made to leave the room.

"I wonder if we could get a deadmare's switch for that? It might be helpful, unless she knows some good shielding spells... Even then, if we were close enough, maybe?" Lavender's mood continued to improve. They might not have the element of surprise exactly, but they at least had uncertainty on their side.

For that matter, what would happen if they could convince the others of the time loop's existence? The ones that were still alive, anyway.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Lose the grenade kid. What, you think there's anything you could do with it that will help anypony? You can't even talk to mares, you're telling me you have the nerve to kill a pony? To kill one of your oldest friends? You want to be like the administrator and get yourself blown up, that's fine, but not while I'm still stuck in your head you're not!"

[Thanqol]

"I wonder if we could get a deadmare's switch for that?

Black Box made a terrified squeak.


"Lose the grenade kid. What, you think there's anything you could do with it that will help anypony? You can't even talk to mares, you're telling me you have the nerve to kill a pony? To kill one of your oldest friends? You want to be like the administrator and get yourself blown up, that's fine, but not while I'm still stuck in your head you're not!"

Black Box totally agreed, delicately put the grenade on the desk, and then hurried out the door and took some deep breaths.

Plum Tuckered walked out behind him, casually tossing the grenade up and down. Black Box pretended he wasn't seeing that.

[BlasTech]

"Well, you have the microphone ... time to find a hiding spot and start broadcasting? Do we even know what to say beyond 'we'd like to talk'?" asked Rosemary.

"I can't see that being entirely effective to be honest."

[the_druid_droid]

Black Box made a terrified squeak.


Black Box totally agreed, delicately put the grenade on the desk, and then hurried out the door and took some deep breaths.

Lavender sighed. "So much for a backup plan. We'd better make this count."


"Well, you have the microphone ... time to find a hiding spot and start broadcasting? Do we even know what to say beyond 'we'd like to talk'?" asked Rosemary.

"I can't see that being entirely effective to be honest."

"Maybe we should start by trying to find out what she wants? Away from all the glowy magical runes?" Lavender mused for a second, "Although if it's kill us all, I vote we try the grenade plan again."

[Balmas]

"You should ask the pegasus where she's going, so you can stay away from there," Gabe commented. "Maybe distract Master Plan when she needs it."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Ugh." Trees grunted. "Do I have to spell everything out for you guys?"

"If Master Plan was meaningfully capable of dying she'd be dead already. She's been in here since the end of the world. Living the same thing over and over again. Sure she used some of that time productively, but you better believe she tried taking the easy way out at least once already."

"Hundreds of years of the same day, over and over again with only the spectre of what you lost for company. Of course she did. We're not going to escape this mess by shooting something in the face."

[the_druid_droid]

"Ugh." Trees grunted. "Do I have to spell everything out for you guys?"

"If Master Plan was meaningfully capable of dying she'd be dead already. She's been in here since the end of the world. Living the same thing over and over again. Sure she used some of that time productively, but you better believe she tried taking the easy way out at least once already."

"Hundreds of years of the same day, over and over again with only the spectre of what you lost for company. Of course she did. We're not going to escape this mess by shooting something in the face."

"That doesn't mean she isn't crazy. In fact, it's a pretty good bet going the other way by this point. So if she wants something nasty from us, we're in real trouble, which is why I think we need to find out what she's after, and figure out some bargaining chip if it's not something we like."

[Balmas]

"I'm not so much worried about shooting her in the face as I am that she'll shoot us in ours. Not really eager to find out what happens to you if you die in a necromantic memory." The griffon sighed. "I guess it all depends on what she wants."

[Thanqol]

"You should ask the pegasus where she's going, so you can stay away from there," Gabe commented. "Maybe distract Master Plan when she needs it."

"Where are you going?" said Black Box.

"It's a surprise," said the Administrator, vanishing around a corner. Well that was cryptic.

"So what's up?" said Plum Tuckered.

"The voices in my head want me to talk to Master Plan, so I can do that with this microphone, but I can't hear her talk back which kinda defeats the point," said Black Box.

"Oh, well why didn't you spit on a biscuit?" said Plum Tuckered.

"What?" said Black Box, but Plum Tuckered was busy typing into his pip-buck. He then raised the screen to Black Box's face.

He had a visual on Master Plan! He didn't know from what, some magic, or hidden camera, or weird Ministry of Morale trick but that was great! He could talk to her without getting his face bucked in by an evil necromantic prodigy.

She was currently systematically going from office to office, breaking down the door, looking around, and moving on, clearly looking for him.

[Deadly]

Blue grumbled something and mentally turned around, staring into their shared mental darkness. "This is the most bloody frustrating situation ever," she grumbled some more as she thought. "If we kill her, the loop will probably do what loops do, and I'm not sure that's any better or worse than us dying. It's probably the same damned thing," she mused and turned around again when Plum brought up his visual.

"Oh, good thinking."

[BlasTech]

"Well lets find a place to broadcast from. One of the offices or a closet or something. Just be careful not to say anything that might give away your position, like 'I wish they put a light in here', once we get there." advised Rosemary.

[Balmas]

"Do you recognize that wing of the office? If you want to find somewhere to hide, go somewhere they've already looked. It'll take longer for her to double back."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Or we could stop wasting time and tell her that we just want to get out of here while we have the chance. You know, talk and walk."

"Call me crazy, but I think that's a good message to start on if we can master such a difficult technique. Because you know perfectly well something will interrupt us again any moment."

Trees paused, before continuing in a quiet voice.
"Maybe the end of the world."

[Thanqol]

Blue grumbled something and mentally turned around, staring into their shared mental darkness. "This is the most bloody frustrating situation ever," she grumbled some more as she thought. "If we kill her, the loop will probably do what loops do, and I'm not sure that's any better or worse than us dying. It's probably the same damned thing," she mused and turned around again when Plum brought up his visual.

"Oh, good thinking."

"Good thinking," said Black Box.

"Ain't naught but a cat's deadlift," said Plum Tuckered modestly.


"Well lets find a place to broadcast from. One of the offices or a closet or something. Just be careful not to say anything that might give away your position, like 'I wish they put a light in here', once we get there." advised Rosemary.

"No stupid comments, got it," said Black Box, as they started to walk.


"Do you recognize that wing of the office? If you want to find somewhere to hide, go somewhere they've already looked. It'll take longer for her to double back."

"Yeah, that's the storage wing, looks like she's working back from the library," said Black Box. "Must have gone to my office first."


"Or we could stop wasting time and tell her that we just want to get out of here while we have the chance. You know, talk and walk."

"Call me crazy, but I think that's a good message to start on if we can master such a difficult technique. Because you know perfectly well something will interrupt us again any moment."

Trees paused, before continuing in a quiet voice.
"Maybe the end of the world."

"Uh, uh hello, Master Plan?" said Black Box.

She paused, languidly, and looked around. Her vision fixed on a speaker, she nodded, and started moving.

"Hey. Hey, we're just trying to get out of this thing, like you are, so, uh, no hard feelings, right?"

"Who am I talking to?" said Master Plan. "Really?"

[Tiki Snakes]

"Ah, mare. Why does everypony always ask that?" muttered Trees. "I don't know. Tell her that you're speaking for a bunch of silly ponies who got their dumb flanks chased in to whatever this all is by a load of murderous robots."

"Feel free to introduce us by name if she really wants to know. Its not like she'll have heard of us."

[Balmas]

"Not like she'd believe us anyway," Gabe grumbled. "'Hi! We're a group of bold warriors and scientists from two hundred years in the future. If possible, would you mind not blowing everything up?' Yeah. That's a laugh."

[Thanqol]

"They seem to think that's an unreasonable question," said Black Box.

"What?" said Master Plan.

"Yeah. I thought 'hello, who are you' was possibly the least crazy thing you've asked all day but they're acting like you kicked their dog or something," said Black Box.

"I see," said Master Plan.

"They say they're from the future though," tried Black Box, awkwardly.

"Ah," said Master Plan.

[BlasTech]

"Why does she want to know?" Asked Rosemary.

"I mean, I don't have any particular objections to telling her, but it seems rather anciliary to solving our current predicament"

[Thanqol]

"Why does she want to know?" Asked Rosemary.

"I mean, I don't have any particular objections to telling her, but it seems rather anciliary to solving our current predicament"

"Why do you want to know?" said Black Box.

"It seems the sort of thing one asks. 'Hello, welcome to my time loop, what are your names?'" said Master Plan.

"They say that's irrelevant,"

"Wow, these guys are rude," said Master Plan. "Okay, disembodied voices. Please state your intentions."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Yeah okay, she probably has a point. Apologise for us? Tell her that Trees says Hi, and that its a lovely nightmarish existential crisis you have here. We came to find some big chemical tank thingies, nearly got murdered by robots and are now stuck in someponies head. I would say my intention is to go back to not being inside someponies head whilst preferably also not being murdered by a robot. At this point, Chemical tank thingies are not really a major priority."

"...And how is her day going?"

[BlasTech]

"I am not rude." huffed Rosemary, to herself. "You merely mistranscribed the intent of my statement."

[Deadly]

"What Trees said," Blue said in a surprisingly tired voice, settling down in the dark and apparently preparing herself for a hopefully civil and calm discussion between rational ponies. "Tell her hi from Blue as well. Make that Resonant Blue, 'cause I don't want to be confused with your marefriend in potentia."

[Balmas]

"Gabriel, griffon for hire. And intentions, as far as I can tell, are get out of the time loop, grab some medical equipment from the necromantically charged death-hospital, and get back to town."

[the_druid_droid]

"And I'm here too," Lavender volunteered, "Lavender the... pony. Sorry about the magic earlier."

[BlasTech]

"... ... Rosemary Unicorn" she added, after a slight delay.

"You may also inform her that ... I ... ... apologise for any offence caused."

She sounded as if the words were being wrung from her.

[Thanqol]

"Okay, they're apologising for all kinds of stuff, including lasering you in the face," said Black Box.

"Appreciated," said Master Plan.

"Their names are Trees, Rosemary, Lavender, Resonant Blue and Gabriel,"

Master Plan laughed out loud. "What kind of name is 'Gabriel'?" she asked.

"I know, right? It doesn't even mean anything," laughed Black Box as well.

"And the rest of them? It sounds like I'm talking to my spice rack," said Master Plan.

"Haha yeah, it's like that," said Black Box, appreciating the normality of this conversation.

"So what do they want?"

"Chemical tank thingies,"

"Uhuh,"

"I'm getting the impression they're from a post-apocalyptic future where they have to scavenge old piping to survive," said Black Box.

"Right, well that makes perfect sense," said Master Plan. "And it's good to know that the end of the world isn't, er, the end of the world."

"Yeah, that's not so reassuring," said Black Box.

[Tiki Snakes]

"So hey. Could you ask her if this is one of those situations where you're stuck in the loop and can't get out, or one of those things where you're actually quite happy with where you are and are wearing the loop like a kinda shell? Any idea how a pony can get out of here? Or, you know. What's actually going on?" Trees ventures.

[the_druid_droid]

"I'm getting the impression they're from a post-apocalyptic future where they have to scavenge old piping to survive," said Black Box.

"It's more like we have to scavenge old piping so I can survive," Lavender volunteered, "It involves a zebra and an astronomer and a sentient spear that apparently thinks it ruled Equestria once. It's... kind of a long story."

She would have brushed her mane out of her face in exasperation, but she didn't really have a mane just now. Or limbs, for that matter.

[BlasTech]

"Or even any information regarding what was happening at this facility." Added Rose. "Presumably you've experienced enough loops to understand it all."

[Thanqol]

"So hey. Could you ask her if this is one of those situations where you're stuck in the loop and can't get out, or one of those things where you're actually quite happy with where you are and are wearing the loop like a kinda shell? Any idea how a pony can get out of here? Or, you know. What's actually going on?" Trees ventures.

"They want to know what the hell," said Black Box.

"It's simple enough. At about midnight this facility will be struck by a megaspell and everything in and around it will perish instantly," said Master Plan. "You, me, everything,"

"Uh," said Black Box, not totally accepting the fact, "sucks."

"Which I was basically expecting; all the variables indicated it. Which was why I set up the memory thing for you," said Master Plan.

"Was wondering about that," said Black Box.

"Basically, if you're in the machine and hooked up properly when the loop ends I get to remember everything that happened in that particular loop. If you're not, I remember that there was a loop and vaguely what happened but details are sketchy at best," said Master Plan.

"Urgh," said Black Box, making a face. Not remembering like that... it didn't feel right.

"So essentially my life's work has become 'how do I survive a point blank Megaspell impact'?" said Master Plan.

"That sounds impossible," said Black Box uncertainly.

"I figured out how to do that centuries ago," said Master Plan.

"Huh,"

"The problem is that the immortality ritual historically takes ten years and a nation of sacrifices to complete,"

"Uh,"

"I've got eighteen hours and seventy three ponies," said Master Plan.

"Hmm."

"So I've had to become very efficient. I believe I've managed to get the ritual time down to six months and the sacrifice of a single city - but that's still five months and twenty nine days out of my time frame. I was hoping that it'd be at least a few more months before the bombs fell but somepony had to jump the gun."

"Er, yes. Terrible."

"On the plus side," said Master Plan, "Necromancy is permanent - which means it carries across loops no matter what. Hence the tattoos," she said, flicking her mane.

"I was going to ask," said Black Box.

"You should see my room,"

"I'd rather not,"

"So, are we clear?"

"Uh, why try to become immortal? Why not try to, I don't know, block the missile?"

"That was plan A."

"Oh?"

"I didn't learn three of the most intricate martial arts in Equestria so I could show off at parties."

"Ah."

[Balmas]

Gabe whistled softly. "Damn... Can't say I approve of her methods, but the nag has style. So, she wants out. We want out. We should help each other."

[Deadly]

Blue dragged a mental hoof down her face. "Do we have any idea what would happen if she succeeded? If she gave up blocking or stopping the missiles, I assume they'd still have hit their target in the past. So this memory thing would still exist, just without her in it, right? She'd have survived the blast and ... I don't know, gone somewhere long ago."

"Don't look at me," Gilda muttered. "All this timey *yay* is giving me a headache."

[Balmas]

"Way I figure it, we're still in the present," Gabe stated. "Still in the hospital, same time, same place as when we went in. Time seems to have passed for Master Plan, enough that she got the tattoos and all. And the purple fiend's Pipbuck shows the correct time, don't ask me how.

"So, if I'm right, we help her out, and we get out, same time as before. And with luck, she'll be so grateful she won't murder our face."

[Deadly]

Blue went silent as she pondered.

"Even if Master Plan manages to survive the blast, that still means everyone else dies ... right?" Evelyn chimed in, running with Blue's thought. "Including our host, which leaves us in a bit of a limbo, doesn't it? Maybe we'll die too, maybe we'll just get thrown out of the memory thing back into the time and place where we entered."

"But what of Master Plan herself?" Blue continued the thought. "Would she have survived in the past? That's what I'd expect."

[Tiki Snakes]

"I'm not sure Time Travel is possible, Blue." Trees says, trying to lead her to a conclusion without stating it outright.

"Master Plan is not in the past. Uh, least I don't think so."

[Deadly]

"She is in a time loop, though," Blue said. "So if she succeeds in here, wouldn't that mean we end up in some alternate version of our own time where she never died from the blast? Assuming we survive, and that this really is a time loop and not just some hellish dream."

[Tiki Snakes]

"She is in a time loop, though," Blue said. "So if she succeeds in here, wouldn't that mean we end up in some alternate version of our own time where she never died from the blast? Assuming we survive, and that this really is a time loop and not just some hellish dream."

"I might be wrong. Okay? I don't know anything about all this." Trees blustered evasively. "Maybe we are literally interacting with the past."

"Or maybe the fact that Plum Tuckered's pipbuck is showing the correct time is not a mistake. Don't make me say it in front of the kid, Blue."

[Deadly]

"I might be wrong. Okay? I don't know anything about all this." Trees blustered evasively. "Maybe we are literally interacting with the past."

"Or maybe the fact that Plum Tuckered's pipbuck is showing the correct time is not a mistake. Don't make me say it in front of the kid, Blue."

"Hey, I don't bucking know either," Blue hit back. "Alright? I don't know the first bloody thing about time loops, or whether any of this is even true. But that's kinda why I'd like to hear what Master Plan thinks about it, so that maybe we can actually decide on something."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Hey box? Could you ask Plan if she has any other ideas for how to break the loop or survive the bomb? Anything we can help with?"

[Balmas]

"Or even if she can guess how long she's been here?"

[BlasTech]

Rosemary kept silent for now, perturbed by the fact that everypony seemed to be interested in acting all friendly with the self-confess necromantic sorceress, whose stated goals included the systematic murder of countless ponies.

Besides, she couldn't really see how this plan had much of a chance of success. The princesses had been immortal too, after all, and it hadn't saved them from the megaspells.

[Thanqol]

"Hey box? Could you ask Plan if she has any other ideas for how to break the loop or survive the bomb? Anything we can help with?"


"Or even if she can guess how long she's been here?"

Black Box was quiet throughout the time-loop bickering. "Uh, they want to know if you have any ideas on how to break the loop. They want to help."

"Oh, I know how to do that."

"Yeah?"

"I just don't wanna. I'll die. Dying is awful, take it from me."

"Uh, fair enough."

"Which is basically the problem your imaginary friends have. I'm not going to die to save them, which means that sooner or later they'll all just fade away and things'll get back to normal."

"Um,"

"And just to prove I'm being sincere with you, Black Box, I'll tell you that since you are the heart of this you are the one that has the power to break it. But I don't think you will because I don't think you want to die either."

"H-how?"

"Simple. You just do the one thing you'd never, ever do."

"Which is?"

"You know it. Deep down," said Master Plan with a little smile.

"So, like I see it, your friends can either solve for immortality in the next three days before they fade forever or they can convince you to off yourself and kill me in the process," said Master Plan. "Either way, if it's me or them it's gonna be them. See you around, Blacky,"

She walked out of view of the camera.

[Deadly]

"Well, that rather put a lid on a few hopes," Blue muttered.

"It rather nicely outlined our options for us," Gilda said.

"A little too nicely, sissy?" Evelyn chirped.

"Wouldn't exactly trust her." Gilda sounded thoughtful.

[Balmas]

"It does put a damper on any working relationships," Gabriel admitted. "And I think we'd best get moving, so she can't stuff you in the machine."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Of course." Trees exclaimed softly to herself. "I had it backwards the whole time. But that would mean..."

She trailed off, mind racing to try and keep up with the idea.

"Black Box?" She piped up after a moment, interrupting her own reverie. "I'm sorry. I lashed out at you earlier because I've been in a pretty bad place lately and I didn't know what was going on. I probably just wanted to hurt you to get a reaction. So I could prove to myself that I existed and lash out at the world for it's cruelty."

"I think I might be losing my mind. That or I might have an idea what Master Plan was talking about. And if I'm right, then I'm sorry for that, too."

[the_druid_droid]

"Great. Well, at least we know what the game is now..."

Lavender sighed. The inside of Black Box's head was an okay place to visit when the alternative was robot death, but she had no intentions of just vanishing. If the Wasteland was going to kill her, it could at least do her the favor of leaving a body.

"What exactly do you think we need to do, Trees?"

[BlasTech]

Information. Information, but not quite enough. Rosemary sat back in the mental space, considering what they'd just been told. Given the timeframe until they 'disappeared' it seemed likely that their bodies were still existent, if incapacitated, in the 'real world'.

Three days would be about how long they'd last without drink, assuming the robots or some other creature didn't get them first.

She would give voice to this suspicion, but first she wanted to hear what Trees' theory was.

[Thanqol]

"Of course." Trees exclaimed softly to herself. "I had it backwards the whole time. But that would mean..."

She trailed off, mind racing to try and keep up with the idea.

"Black Box?" She piped up after a moment, interrupting her own reverie. "I'm sorry. I lashed out at you earlier because I've been in a pretty bad place lately and I didn't know what was going on. I probably just wanted to hurt you to get a reaction. So I could prove to myself that I existed and lash out at the world for it's cruelty."

"I think I might be losing my mind. That or I might have an idea what Master Plan was talking about. And if I'm right, then I'm sorry for that, too."

"That's all right," murmured Black Box quietly.

"Wow! So we're really in a time loop?" said Plum Tuckered, hopping on the spot. "Awesome! I can do anything I want with no consequences! I mean, I could do that anyway because of the whole world-ending thing but that means that this Pip-Buck was right about the time which makes me wonder what else it could be right about -" he shook it and it made a loud rattling sound, like something was totally unsecured inside it "- anyway while that was cool and all we still need to go see the Minster of Morale!"

[Tiki Snakes]

"Box? Plum might be on to something. You should get him to look at the thing in more detail while you go. To see the Minister, or whatever. You can ignore the next bit." Trees addressed her host directly.

"I'm not at all sure what we need to do." Trees continued more quietly to the vague cloud of familiar and less than familiar bodiless floating pony voices. "And what I'm thinking is far too insane to possibly be true."

"But uh, well. I had been assuming that we were in some kind of magical simulation and only Master Plan and us were really real. Because only Plan realised this wasn't, you know, what it looks like it is?"

"Only I was wrong. I must be wrong. Because of what she was saying, you understand? Ack, it's hard to explain but think about it. She doesn't remember what has happened unless Box is in the thing at the end of the loop and ending the loop any way other than by making her immortal or some impossibility like that means she dies. And she was going on about how Black Box knows what it'd take deep down and stuff?"

"None of this is real, that much is obvious. But what could be going on then? Well, she already told us. This is all Black Box's memory, right? Remembering events and ponies so well that they might as well be here? Master Plan says that she remembers the previous loops, but why would she? She's not the rememberer here. Remembering is Black Box's talent. His special talent."

"Master Plan isn't the one real pony in here. She's the memory of a pony smart enough to figure out she's a memory. If we end the loop without finishing her crazy necromancy, then she will cease to exist. Or something like that."

"Oh, and I see no reason to believe we have 3 days till we magically cease to exist because this isn't a time loop." She added almost confidently. "Either we die in a couple of hours from massive rad overdose or three days is the point where the memories simply won't be able to hold us anymore."

[BlasTech]

"Or the time when we die of thirs --- Waitamoment" said Rosemary, as her train of thought abruptly jumped the tracks.

"I recognise that the Minister made it clear she would see us today. But is he saying that he knows when or where now?" she asked. "If so, we should make for there with all haste."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Oh, hey. Does plum know her tag?"

[Thanqol]

"Hey, Plum? Do you know how to see the Minister?" said Black Box.

"Well, no. But if she's a hot dog's mile away I'd figure the only way to see her is some kind of spell, and you're the unicorn," said Plum Tuckered.

"You don't have any other tricks in that Pip-Buck? The scrying window thing? Pip-Buck tags?"

"It'd be easier mailing a duck's senator," said Plum, smiling relentlessly.

[Balmas]

Gabe sat quietly as he listened to Trees. "Only thing I can see is that Black Box would have a hard time remembering what ponies would do when put in a hard situation, like the administrator."

[the_druid_droid]

"So if we're in Black Box's memory, we need to find a way out. And we could probably stand to know what sort of magic got this all started in the first place... What sort of spell sets up a memory world strong enough to pull in other ponies?"

Lavender tried to think; hadn't Master Plan said something about Black Box hurting himself before they'd lost her? And that he'd have to do something he wouldn't ever do to break the cycle?

"But I think you're right, the Minister may be important, especially since she's related to the password..."

[Deadly]

Blue and her assorted voices all went all quiet, as if all deep in thought. Then she said, "I ... think I begin to see. Plan talked about the one thing Black Box would never do. I think she'd like him and us to think that thing is to kill himself, but I don't think that's the real thing."

"What is the one thing Black Box never does? His special talent is remembering with total precision, so what he never, ever does is to forget! What he has to do is to forget, pure and simple. Death might do that, but maybe there are less drastic ways to make him forget."

[BlasTech]

"... so, what you're saying is that we need to locate a source of hundred-proof Appaloosan brandy?" asked Rosemary, dubiously. "Or its closest equivalent?"

[Deadly]

"... so, what you're saying is that we need to locate a source of hundred-proof Appaloosan brandy?" asked Rosemary, dubiously. "Or its closest equivalent?"

Blue grimaced. She didn't much like saying it, so Gilda did it for her, "Yeah, or some kind of drug. We're kinda in a great place to find exactly that kind of stuff, or ponies who know how to make it."

"If they aren't all dead," Blue added.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Not exactly. It's probably a coming to terms and moving on kind of thing we're looking for." Trees suggests. "You know, unfinished business, saying goodbye, all that kind of stuff? So back to plans A and B. Record a message for the mare he has a crush on, maybe meet the administrator."

"And, you know. Apologise to Master Plan or something probably? I don't know. That's how it usually goes down in the stories. Hell, I think I've got one like that recorded on my pip-buck. I could play it for you guys if I had my body handy."

She paused for a moment, before adding.

"Admittedly, it's a pretty angry one, the language is a little...uh...aggressive? Oh and it's really more of an allegory for the inherent corruption of the Unicorn regime than a straight up ghost tale, but her flow is slick and the beat just goes on for days."

[Balmas]

"Normally I'd say to bop him on the head and have done with it. As is..." He waved a distinctly non-corporeal talon before continuing. "We might find it more difficult.

"And a'course, there's just one thing. We aren't steering this thing. Whaddya say, Box? You've gotta be thinking something about all this."

[Thanqol]

"Normally I'd say to bop him on the head and have done with it. As is..." He waved a distinctly non-corporeal talon before continuing. "We might find it more difficult.

"And a'course, there's just one thing. We aren't steering this thing. Whaddya say, Box? You've gotta be thinking something about all this."

"I've been drunk before without any loss of memory. It's why I'm banned from half of Los Pegasus," said Black Box.

"It's pretty weird how you talk to yourself like that," said Plum Tuckered.

"Yeah, I know, right?" said Black Box. "They want to see if they can make me forget."

"Why in the candy hills would they want that?"

"Uh, they think it's the thing I'd never ever do."

"Pretty sure that you also aren't likely to grow wings and a princess tiara and I don't rightly suspect that's what the creepy lady was talking about either."

"Okay fine, that's a dead end, I still don't get how I'm meant to talk to the Minister! The only time I saw her was for like fifteen minutes years ago, and now it's a physical impossibility to get to Manehattan or wherever in less than a day! Even with teleportation, flight, whatever! It's impossible to go that fast! I can't get there in time!" said Black Box, starting to lose his cool.

[the_druid_droid]

"Okay fine, that's a dead end, I still don't get how I'm meant to talk to the Minister! The only time I saw her was for like fifteen minutes years ago, and now it's a physical impossibility to get to Manehattan or wherever in less than a day! Even with teleportation, flight, whatever! It's impossible to go that fast! I can't get there in time!" said Black Box, starting to lose his cool.

Lavender let out a frustrated sigh. "I'm starting to think the one thing you won't do is calm down. Look, we can figure this out somehow. We just need time to think, although I realize we don't have a lot of that."

[Thanqol]

Lavender let out a frustrated sigh. "I'm starting to think the one thing you won't do is calm down. Look, we can figure this out somehow. We just need time to think, although I realize we don't have a lot of that."

"Alright. Alright," said Black Box with a little bit of huff, sitting down to give his thoughts time to think.

[BlasTech]

"So, either we need to induce forgetfullness in a pony that has an eidectic memory. Or we need to help our host come to terms with his 'unfinished business'? This is starting to sound like a Hearth's Warming tale." mused Rosemary, into the silence that followed.

"Start with the writing, that's my suggestion. We can sort out the rest of this, including how the minister is planning to 'meet' us, in the meantime." she volunteered.

[Balmas]

"Anyone else you know around here that you might want to say goodbye to?"

[the_druid_droid]

"We wouldn't be lucky enough to get some insight into Black Box's worries and unfinished business directly, since we're inside his head, would we?" That seemed too easy, and the thought of meddling with another pony's mind directly made uncomfortable things slither through Lavender's gut.

Still, things had stopped being fun a while back, and all the alicorn really wanted now was to get out of their mental prison, which brought a great deal of empathy for Trees' position on things.

[Deadly]

"Surely magic can make a pony forget if it can also create a permanent memory," Blue mused, although it seemed she was the only one still believing in this idea. "Perhaps just reverse the process?" Not that Blue had any clue how magic worked.


"Start with the writing, that's my suggestion. We can sort out the rest of this, including how the minister is planning to 'meet' us, in the meantime." she volunteered.

"What writing?" Blue sounded a bit confused.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Black Box has feelings for, uh." Trees thought for a moment. "Deep Blue, wasn't it? Our suggestion is that he get on with recording her a message. About his feelings, or what he would have liked to tell her if they'd had time. That is, record, playback, then when we're sure he's not got his hoof lodged in the back of his mouth again, send it her or broadcast it like with 'Plan."

"My personal suggestion is to not sit around waiting for Plan while we do this."

[Balmas]

"Black Box has feelings for, uh." Trees thought for a moment. "Deep Blue, wasn't it? Our suggestion is that he get on with recording her a message. About his feelings, or what he would have liked to tell her if they'd had time. That is, record, playback, then when we're sure he's not got his hoof lodged in the back of his mouth again, send it her or broadcast it like with 'Plan."

"My personal suggestion is to not sit around waiting for Plan while we do this."

"We do need to keep moving around," Gabe agreed. "If she can't find us, she can't stuff us in the machine. Remember, that's a win for her: we can't get out, and she remembers what happened today."

[the_druid_droid]

"Surely magic can make a pony forget if it can also create a permanent memory," Blue mused, although it seemed she was the only one still believing in this idea. "Perhaps just reverse the process?" Not that Blue had any clue how magic worked.

"Magic can do a lot of things..." Lavender said very quietly. "But that's not really my specialty. I don't think Rosemary can do it either."


"We do need to keep moving around," Gabe agreed. "If she can't find us, she can't stuff us in the machine. Remember, that's a win for her: we can't get out, and she remembers what happened today."

"I agree. Although at least now we know what she wants with us."

[BlasTech]

"Very well then. If Master Plum here will lend us his pip-buck, we may as well start composing messages."

"Apart from the basic message, is there anything you'd like to say Black Box?" she asked.

[Thanqol]

"Seriously? That's what you guys think this is?" said Black Box, sounding extremely high-strung. "About my love life? You think I got trapped in a time loop for two centuries because I can't work up the courage to ask out some girl I sort of like? I did that this morning! Sure, it was a little clumsy, but I did it! I've gone on dates before, I'm not that pathetic!"

He did indeed keep moving, though Plum Tuckered lead the way.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Does it matter, Box?" Trees said with a mental shrug. "Either you are a short time from looping back and forgetting all of this on a conscious level, or its the legitimate end of the world. Either way, this is your last chance to tell her how you feel, or whatever else you might have to say to her."

"Of course, if you don't really have feelings for her and its just a physical attraction or something, that's fine too."

[Thanqol]

"I like her, I don't love her," said Black Box with a strange amount of bitterness in his voice. "She's pretty and she's smart, but I know what love is and it's not that. Maybe later, but not now. You can record and broadcast it if you really must but it's a pretty crap sentiment to go out on."

[Balmas]

"If that's not it, then what?" Gabriel snapped. "You know you better than I do, so if the last thing you'd do isn't to commit suicide, then what?"

[Tiki Snakes]

"Black Box, do you love Master Plan?" Trees asked, quietly.

[Deadly]

"Well he's got a point there," Blue muttered about the crap sentiment. "Ain't exactly material for epic love poetry."

[BlasTech]

Could've fooled us. Rosemary thought. If this colt wants us to latch onto a better idea, I'm all ears.

She wasn't sure if her own internal thoughts could be picked up by her compatriots, or her host, but it seemed that the polite thing would be not to give 'voice' to them.

But she was thinking them though, thinking them very hard, while she waited for Black Box's reply.

[Thanqol]

"If that's not it, then what?" Gabriel snapped. "You know you better than I do, so if the last thing you'd do isn't to commit suicide, then what?"

"Why should I tell you jerks?" said Black Box, banging his head against the wall. "Maybe Master Plan is right! Maybe I don't want to die! Is that so wrong?"


"Black Box, do you love Master Plan?" Trees asked, quietly.

"No!" said Black Box. "I'm not even sure I like her most days! She's like the manipulative little sister from hell!"

[the_druid_droid]

"Why should I tell you jerks?" said Black Box, banging his head against the wall. "Maybe Master Plan is right! Maybe I don't want to die! Is that so wrong?"

"Because maybe it will give you closure. And there are worse things than dying..." Lavender's voice was still soft. "But I don't really believe it's death that's worrying you, somehow. I think it's something personal, that hurts too much to talk about."

"I'm sorry things happened this way."

[Deadly]

"We're trying to help, alright?" Blue said to calm the poor pony down. "We're not trying to get you down, or tell you to put a bullet through your head. Of course you want to live, and so do we. There has to be something we can do, something better than suicide or giving immortality and freedom to an already disturbingly powerful pony, but we're kinda stuck in here. So let's help each other out, okay?"

[Balmas]

"That's exactly what I mean," Gabriel grumped. "You won't want to die. Neither do we. We're trying to figure out a way where we both get what we want. We're trying to help."

[BlasTech]

Rosemary just stewed in silence. If prompted much further, she was quite liable to respond with a very un-helpful stream of words, particularly in light of her compatriot's attempts to placate the colt.

If only she had some mental hooves that she could use to smack some sense into him.

[Thanqol]

"Because maybe it will give you closure. And there are worse things than dying..." Lavender's voice was still soft. "But I don't really believe it's death that's worrying you, somehow. I think it's something personal, that hurts too much to talk about."

"I'm sorry things happened this way."

"Mmh," said Black Box.

"All right. All right, I'm sorry, I just... sorry," said Black Box, indignation collapsing on itself. "I'll just... keep going," he said, starting to put one hoof in front of another.

[the_druid_droid]

"Mmh," said Black Box.

"All right. All right, I'm sorry, I just... sorry," said Black Box, indignation collapsing on itself. "I'll just... keep going," he said, starting to put one hoof in front of another.

"If you like, I can tell you about me. Maybe that's a fairer trade. I probably owe everypony an explanation by now anyway." Lavender had been unsure at first if she could really trust the others enough to open up about her past, but now that they were stuck in the mind of a time-looped pony, it didn't seem like there was much else to do. And she had a certain sympathy for the victims of spells-gone-wrong.

[Thanqol]

"If you like, I can tell you about me. Maybe that's a fairer trade. I probably owe everypony an explanation by now anyway." Lavender had been unsure at first if she could really trust the others enough to open up about her past, but now that they were stuck in the mind of a time-looped pony, it didn't seem like there was much else to do. And she had a certain sympathy for the victims of spells-gone-wrong.

"Yeah, alright. I guess it is about time I got to actually know one of you," said Black Box.

[BlasTech]

Rosemary opened and closed her mental mouth several times. She wanted to say something to the effect that Lavender didn't need to say anything if it made her uncomfortable. Or if she didn't want to talk about it in front of her.

The knowledge that Lavender probably didn't give a feather about her presence stayed her tongue.

It realy was easier to hide when they were all trapped in here like this.

[Tiki Snakes]

"We don't get to choose who we love. There's no guarantee we'll like them and they can often be infuriating." Trees said quietly. "But I won't force the issue right now, I'm probably clutching at straws."

She didn't add anything further, allowing Lavender space for whatever it was she was doing.

[Balmas]

Gabriel sat in the void. Yeah, it could be interesting to hear the story behind the Princess-not-a-princess. He'd just wait and see what she said...

[the_druid_droid]

Lavender took a deep breath, and then started off as simply as she could. She told herself she could always back out if things got too hard, but for now she just wouldn't think about what was coming.

"Well, to start off, I - or we, I guess - are from a time after your world ends. At least we are if I understand what's going on here correctly. But the end of the world didn't actually mean the end of ponies."

"I don't really know the details, but some of us managed to survive; I think most that did made it through by hiding out in Stables when things got especially bad. I'm guessing you probably know what those are already."

See? This was going to be easy.

"I grew up in one of those Stables. Not like the ponies who went down there originally; my family moved into one that had opened up and been cleared out. They thought it would be safer, since the world is a dangerous place now. But it wasn't so bad there. The doors were even open during the day, and you could go outside when the guards were on duty."

"I- I had a sister, Misty... Misty Blue." No, there it was - the arcing filaments of a headache, the residual magic from years of memory alteration flaring up.

"We were young, just little fillies, and kind of stupid... we kept playing farther and farther out, like it was a game to see how far we could go into the scary Wasteland." Lavender would have shuddered if she'd had any body to shudder with. "One day, I guess we went too far. I slipped and fell a long way; I don't really remember... I just know that it hurt so much. I think I must have broken something, and Misty ran off to get help..."

The pain Lavender could remember. Back then, she had wondered if she was going to die out there, if something would come by to finish her off while she could barely even move. She had wondered if that would hurt too.

Lavender could also remember that she'd been ashamed of herself; an ending like that wasn't brave or good, it was just stupid. She would die knowing she had been stupid.

"...But Misty took a really long time, or what felt like it. And she wasn't the one who found me in the end. There were other ponies, dressed in orange and black; I remember one of them stood over me for a little while, I guess he was examining me."

"Then I think I must have passed out."

"When I woke up, I was in that place. HREC." Lavender's voice was getting husky, and her headache had become a thrum in her ears.

"It's not very nice to remember the early days there. They... did things. Changed me. I don't... know if any of you know this, but I wasn't born with a horn or wings. That was HREC. They needed a Princess, so they tried to make me one."

"But I'm not a Princess. I'm not a wizard. And I tried to get away from them so many times, even though every time they would stop me and drag me back, and even now that I'm finally outside, we talked to that fortune-teller and she said I can't run away even if I come all the way out here, and suddenly I'm stuck in some spell I don't understand, and I'm... scared. I'm really scared."

There was almost a catch in her voice, but Lavender cleared her throat.

"I'm sorry. That's probably not what you wanted to hear... but I promised I'd tell you about myself."

[Thanqol]

"That's... I'm so sorry," said Black Box. "I mean, that's..."

Just ahead, Plum Tuckered opened a door, said "We're here!" and Black Box followed inside - then froze.

"This is the feathering memory machine room!" yelled Black Box in shock. It was indeed; the same disco-ball Megaspell firing chamber with the same memory recorder/reviewer technology thing. "This is exactly where Master Plan is trying to get me! What is wrong with you!?"

Plum Tuckered held up his Pip-Buck defensively. "Hey, hey, I just follow where the little pink arrow in front of my eyes tells me to go!" said Plum Tuckered. Looking closely there was indeed a little pink navigation arrow pointing directly at the memory machine.

[Deadly]

Blue was silent as Lavender finished her story. The things some ponies will do to others, she thought and felt the anger burn inside her. She kept it there, burning deep inside. There was nothing she could direct it at in here.

"I'm sorry," she said after a pause. "I wish I could offer you a hug or anything. I'll save it for you, for when we get out of this. I know it's not much, though."



As they entered the chamber, Blue's attention turned to the machine. "Say, hypothetically speaking, what do you think would happen if he smashed that memory thing to pieces?" Blue might not be able to really let her anger out in her current state, but maybe she'd at least get to do it through their host. That thought pleased her. "Get a big mallet and just go nuts on it, screaming and smashing. Yeah." She almost sounded melancholic, talking about it.

[Tiki Snakes]

"Ugh. Shut up and get in the machine, Box. You don't stand to lose anything here, it's us with the time-concerns. Get in the machine and meet the damn pony." Trees prickled. "We've no better idea, so we might as well get on with it and take the chance."

"And I think if he broke it we'd be straight outta luck, Blue. Just call it a hunch. So don't do that."

[Deadly]

"Or getting in the machine would doom us all," Blue countered. "You know, 'cause that's what Master Plan was trying to get him to do all along."

[BlasTech]

"I would also council using the machine." Said Rosemary, quietly, before lapsing back into silence.

[Deadly]

Blue groaned. "Alright, no one listens to me, I get it. So since no one is going to bother listening anyway or pausing to think before jumping off the cliff, I'm just going to keep talking while you do that. So here's another thought while we wait to live or die at the toss of a coin: are we really sure we should just trust this Plum so easily?"

[Tiki Snakes]

"Idiot savant as internalised externalisation of Black box's subconsciousness." Trees stated, matter of fact. "Of course we can't trust him, but we can come closer to trusting him than any other single facet of what we are experiencing. And I'm including Box in that, technically. Also each other, because there are more voices in here than I can account for."

[Deadly]

"Idiot savant as internalised externalisation of Black box's subconsciousness." Trees stated, matter of fact. "Of course we can't trust him, but we can come closer to trusting him than any other single facet of what we are experiencing. And I'm including Box in that, technically. Also each other, because there are more voices in here than I can account for."

"I just think we should exercise a bit of healthy caution, is all. If anyone actually has good reason to believe that this machine won't just suck his brains right out, I'm all ears, because I sure as hay would like to get out of here too, or at least make some progress."

"One voice," Gilda muttered. "Dunno how many voices the rest of you are hearing, but I don't know who this dweeb is. Frankly didn't think it was important. It's not like another voice is all that strange."

"Well, I know who you are," Blue said, "But I don't know why you're here."

"Came here with the others," Gilda said blankly. "I'm pretty sure you didn't."

"Right. You've got a point, Trees," Blue muttered, ignoring the griffon. "Too many damn voices in here."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Who has time for caution when you might already be dead?" Trees responded with an almost casual indifference. "Alright, how about the fact that Plan said she's stuffed him into it repeatedly over the last two hundred years? About once every couple of loops at least? If we assume a loop is about three days and that she manages it as little as one in three loops, that still leaves about uh, just over eight thousand trial runs?"

[Deadly]

"Who has time for caution when you might already be dead?" Trees responded with an almost casual indifference. "Alright, how about the fact that Plan said she's stuffed him into it repeatedly over the last two hundred years? About once every couple of loops at least? If we assume a loop is about three days and that she manages it as little as one in three loops, that still leaves about uh, just over eight thousand trial runs?"

"We might not be dead," Blue said. "I know you're reckless and don't care for your own bloody well being, but others do, you know. They may even care for your well being too, and heavens know somepony has to."

"If she's been doing it over and over, maybe there's a reason ... like, I don't know, needing to make sure the loop was created in the first place by sucking out his brains and storing them. Maybe she stuffs him in the machine at the end of every loop."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Use your noggin, Blue. We could already be dead and if we're not, time isn't on our side. Time is the enemy, it's working entirely for Master Plan right now." Trees explained almost patiently.

"And I for one don't have time to second guess the secrets given away in a perfectly serviceable villainous monologue. She said she only remembers what happens when Box is in the machine at the end of the loop. So I'm working on the assumption he sometimes isn't. That's also the reason why, in case you missed it the first time. Because she doesn't remember the loop otherwise? Damnit pony, this is no time for paranoia. And I don't have time to psycho-analyse you too right now, so unless you can put your hoof on exactly why this particular piece of imaginary equipment is so irrationally terrifying we're just going to have to move on and deal with your repressed memories of your foalhood visits to the dentist some other time, okay?"

[Deadly]

"Because plugging him into the machine is exactly what Master Plan tried to make him do," Blue said. "And we hopefully have more than a split-second to act in."

"At least let's try to agree on what we expect the machine to do for us, and why we believe this to be plausible. Do we even know if it has more than one setting? Can we control it, or will we just have to cross our hooves and hope for the best?"

[Tiki Snakes]

"I'm not debating this with you, Blue. We have to do this and it has to be now because it's our only lead and the longer we spend foaling around the more likely Plan catches us or something crazy happens and interrupts us."

"You know it's true. You know I'm right. We're getting in the machine and we're meeting the Minister and we are doing it right now.

[Deadly]

"Would you just shut up!" Blue shouted. "And take five damn seconds to get everyone on board, especially the pony you're putting in the machine. I for one don't *yay*ing care to follow your reckless jump off every *yay*ing cliff you see just because you don't have an ounce of god-damned patience in you!"

"Black Box," she said, demonstrably turning her attention away from Trees. "Do you think we can control this machine to meet the Minister?"

[Tiki Snakes]

"If you never jump off the cliff then you'll never learn to fly." Trees replied. "Sooner or later you're going to have to stop letting your demons rule you."

"But sure, hold a poll first. Why not?"

[Balmas]

"We hold a poll first because there are more ponies here than just you," Gabe said at last. "And what Black Box does is gonna affect all of us. Box has been in the machine at least once before, can we agree on that? So if he has, and the Ministry Mare is inside it, then he's working on memory, and should be able to remember. If not, then we're playing into Plan's, er, plan. Hell, we're doing that no matter what."

[Tiki Snakes]

"Fine. Let's sit around talking about it first. Give me one good alternative that doesn't boil down to walk away and hope for the best. Ugh. Better yet, don't bother. Do whatever you want." Trees groaned. "I'm going to go be a flower again until the stupid blows over."

Trees imagined a noise, like a single clear bell. She pictured a circle dividing into segments, the segments peeling away from each other and twirling inwards to form petals. She wrapped the idea around herself and became it, smothering her energy and becoming calm, small and protected. Iron leaves curled around conceptual petals and there was stillness.

[Thanqol]

"Are your geese all frying there, buddy?" said Plum Tuckered, having noted the way that Black Box had closed his eyes and slammed his head on the ground.

"Yes. Crazy voices," muttered Black Box. "Basically the choice is if I should smash the machine or get in it."

"Both of those sound totally crazy," said Plum Tuckered helpfully. "If you ask me, I just figured the Pip-Buck thinks this'd be the last place Master Plan looks."

"Awesome," said Black Box.

Plum Tuckered sat down and started pressing buttons happily. Black Box muttered to his voices, "Just decide on something, will you?"

[the_druid_droid]

"This is the feathering memory machine room!" yelled Black Box in shock. It was indeed; the same disco-ball Megaspell firing chamber with the same memory recorder/reviewer technology thing. "This is exactly where Master Plan is trying to get me! What is wrong with you!?"

Plum Tuckered held up his Pip-Buck defensively. "Hey, hey, I just follow where the little pink arrow in front of my eyes tells me to go!" said Plum Tuckered. Looking closely there was indeed a little pink navigation arrow pointing directly at the memory machine.

Lavender had mostly managed control of her voice again. "Maybe it works differently if Master Plan isn't the one in control?..."


Blue was silent as Lavender finished her story. The things some ponies will do to others, she thought and felt the anger burn inside her. She kept it there, burning deep inside. There was nothing she could direct it at in here.

"I'm sorry," she said after a pause. "I wish I could offer you a hug or anything. I'll save it for you, for when we get out of this. I know it's not much, though."

"It does make me feel a little better. Thanks." Lavender smiled, at least mentally.


"Both of those sound totally crazy," said Plum Tuckered helpfully. "If you ask me, I just figured the Pip-Buck thinks this'd be the last place Master Plan looks."

"Awesome," said Black Box.

Plum Tuckered sat down and started pressing buttons happily. Black Box muttered to his voices, "Just decide on something, will you?"

"Actually, Plum might have a point. We did just run away from this place, after all. And it's not like we know what comes next either way."

[Deadly]

"If you never jump off the cliff then you'll never learn to fly." Trees replied. "Sooner or later you're going to have to stop letting your demons rule you."

"But sure, hold a poll first. Why not?"

"If you want to fly, you make sure you have the wings first, otherwise your wings will come once you splat against the ground," Blue said coldly to the pony-flower in the dark. "As Gabe said, we're in this together. If being moderately cautious and discussing things with the rest of the team is demonic, then I'll take the demons any day, thank you very much."


"Are your geese all frying there, buddy?" said Plum Tuckered, having noted the way that Black Box had closed his eyes and slammed his head on the ground.

"Yes. Crazy voices," muttered Black Box. "Basically the choice is if I should smash the machine or get in it."

"Both of those sound totally crazy," said Plum Tuckered helpfully. "If you ask me, I just figured the Pip-Buck thinks this'd be the last place Master Plan looks."

"Awesome," said Black Box.

Plum Tuckered sat down and started pressing buttons happily. Black Box muttered to his voices, "Just decide on something, will you?"

"Good point. Hopefully she doesn't think that way too."

"Okay, look, do you know how this machine works? What it does or can do? If not, it might be worth it to at least have a closer look at it. Maybe Plum can help. I'm not saying we should smash it, because maybe it could be the key, but I don't think we should use it either until we understand it a little better."

[Thanqol]

"Good point," muttered Black Box, standing up. "Hey, Plum? Do you know how this thing works?"

"Nope!"

"Well that's just dandy," said Black Box.

"I can rustle up a few apples, though," said Plum Tuckered, pulling out one of the many many cables from his Pip-Buck and plugging it into the device.

All the lights on the memory-device instantly glowed bright neon pink. "Well ain't that something?" said Plum. "Looks like it's just basically a big, evil Recollector, which means it just needs the right kind of memory orb inserted and it'll run that as a thing."

[Deadly]

"That's it?" Blue sounded mildly skeptical, but it wasn't like she knew anything about technology like this. "I see. So Plan records her own memory of every loop and tries to feed it to Box so he'll remember that in the next loop. That at least makes sense," she continued. "So it's empty right now? Then we'd need an orb with a memory of the Minister."

[BlasTech]

"I'm somewhat perturbed by his description of it as a big evil recollector ..." began Rosemary.

"But regardless, how do we get a suitable memory orb? Given that Black Box is essentially a living memory orb, it may be feasible to just connect him to it in stead. And unless this facility has a Ministry of Morale orb storage facility then I'm not seeing any other obvious solutions."

[Tiki Snakes]

Trees floated in the meditative calm of the void and did nothing.
Well, almost nothing.

Worst prison ever, Trees the conceptual flower entity thought to herself.

[Thanqol]

"I'm somewhat perturbed by his description of it as a big evil recollector ..." began Rosemary.

"But regardless, how do we get a suitable memory orb? Given that Black Box is essentially a living memory orb, it may be feasible to just connect him to it in stead. And unless this facility has a Ministry of Morale orb storage facility then I'm not seeing any other obvious solutions."

"I..." said Black Box, mouth gaping a bit. "I know the spell Locate Object!"

It was one of his few really pathetic talents, but it was useful at last! He lowered his horn and started to concentrate.

"There's one in this room somewhere!" said Black Box, immediately before his face crinkled in confusion. Wait, what? Where could it possibly be hidden?