View Full Version : You guys aren't gonna believe this!

2007-01-21, 07:21 PM
Ok, everyone here knows that I play with an all-monster party in the Forgotten Realms setting. Well, guess what? Our DM essentially screwed us over this last session. We were hired to hunt down and destroy an odd-looking man who wore an all-over suit of incredibly tough green armor, with a helmet that had some sort of gold/orange mask that blocked anyone from seeing his face, he had some kind of magic energy shield all over him that blocked anything hitting him, and he was insanely strong, capable of punching a regular half-orc man and breaking his neck. Well, turns out the guy also had a pair of odd-looking weapons that fired small bolts of 'blue fire', as well as another pair of weapons strapped across his back that appeared to be small, and had pink crystals poking out of the top of them. Go 'head, guess who our bastard DM had us fight?

2007-01-21, 07:23 PM
Jesus in disguise?

2007-01-21, 07:23 PM
So how'd the fight go, chief? :smalltongue:

2007-01-21, 07:24 PM
The guy from Halo.

2007-01-21, 07:26 PM
Neophyte, you guessed it correctly. We fought the freakin' Master Chief. And got brutally mauled. And y'know what else? When we were about to win(the chief was running low on ammo)he whipped out an energy sword, and went postal on my mino in melee combat.

Deus Mortus
2007-01-21, 07:28 PM

2007-01-21, 07:29 PM
How can he whip out an energy sword if he had a main weapon and a melee weapon? Unless he was an advanced masterchief from Halo 3....

And why didn't you just throw a small bomb at him (compressed flour in a ceramic container with a fuse) to knock out his shields?

2007-01-21, 07:29 PM
I was actually guessing Fett, but I didn't think too hard about it.

Fett would have been cooler.

2007-01-21, 07:31 PM
I was actually guessing Fett, but I didn't think too hard about it.

Fett would have been cooler.

That was my first guess also. But then, I haven't played much Halo.

2007-01-21, 07:40 PM
Well, our DM has been on a Halo binge recently. :( Still, the Chief was an unexpected opponent. We were all expecting something else. Anyways, turns out when our wizard actually finished him off, we looted his body. Something for everyone. Shotgun, rocket launcher, the dual needlers, the dual plasma rifles, and for the goblin/kobold members of the party, Magnums. We also got our hands on about a dozen frag grenades, and a pair of plasma grenades. We were overjoyed but everyone except the wizard was upset about DYING.

Edit: The absolutely exact list of gear that we got off the chief is as follows.

1 Battle Rifle from Halo 2.
1 Assault Rifle from Halo 1.
3 Magnums from Halo 2.
A dozen frag grenades.
2 plasma grenades.
2 Plasma rifles.
4 Brute Plasma rifles from Halo 2.
2 plasma pistols.
3 SMGs from Halo 2.
1 Rocket Launcher.
1 Energy Sword from Halo 2.
1 Brute Shot from Halo 2.
2 Shotguns.
And about five-dozen batteries/clips for EACH GUN. Twice as many for the ammo-based weapons.

It's good too. :) We're all still arguing about who gets what. I, personally, want dibs on the sword.
And don't complain. :P It's sci-fi gear in the FR setting. Don't like it, eat a face full of Brute Shot.

2007-01-21, 07:41 PM
What was his CR and class I would just love to know? How long did it take you to realize exactly who you were fighting? Just be glad he didn't have any grenades of his own

2007-01-21, 07:53 PM
CR? No idea. He apparently was a five level Fighter, with ten levels in the Marine prestige class, and five levels in the Spartan prestige class. Level 20. Each of us was about level 15-16. We were lucky to get outta that at all. It was almost a TPK. And as for how long it took us to figure out who we were fighting...well, lets just say we're not the most observant. It wasn't until the wizard heard a female voice from inside the chief's helmet that we knew who we just killed.

2007-01-21, 07:53 PM
Pffft. If you won, it's proof the DM wimped out. Master Chief's way up in the epic-levels. Figure out how tough you'd have to be to win all the fights he's fought, then add in all the experience he's gained from it.

- Saph

2007-01-21, 07:58 PM
THAT'S WHAT I TOLD HIM. But he's been playing on easy. :P Noob.

2007-01-21, 08:06 PM
Yeah, I wonder what the CR of four Elites, each stronger than you, would be. :)

- Saph

2007-01-21, 08:08 PM
Yeah, I wonder what the CR of four Elites, each stronger than you, would be. :)

- Saph

2007-01-21, 08:15 PM
I agree with the above comic. Chief's gear or not, I think we'd get our asses handed to us on a fancy covenant-designed platter.

2007-01-21, 08:28 PM
Ok, this just in. My party has been running tests in Halo and Halo 2 to see what weapons do what, and what use they would be in a D&D setting and what kind of uses they would have in a fight. Now, I no longer want the sword. What I DO want? Dual-wielded Brute Plasma Rifles, with the Assault rifle as a secondary option.

2007-01-21, 08:50 PM
Ok, this just in. My party has been running tests in Halo and Halo 2 to see what weapons do what, and what use they would be in a D&D setting and what kind of uses they would have in a fight. Now, I no longer want the sword. What I DO want? Dual-wielded Brute Plasma Rifles, with the Assault rifle as a secondary option.

Brute plasma? Blah. Cheap knock-offs with less efficiency than the standard Elite.

2007-01-21, 09:20 PM
:P Faster firing rate. It balances.

2007-01-21, 09:58 PM
Ok, bad news. Turns out the Chief had a Pelican nearby...which we have confiscated, and are attempting to 'figure out how it works.' However, within five minutes of learning how the thing works, we get attacked by UNSC marines. I don't know about my fellows, but I am personally getting a bit ticked off. Sure the gear's nice. Sure, we get a type of Airship that's basically immune to destruction except for some seriously dangerous exceptions, and yes, we are essentially wreaking havoc with the fabric of time and space. But still, one fight with a Halo character is bad enough. Now we're going up against Marines. It won't be long before this boils over. We've set it to a vote that the wizard flies the Pelican. We fly over the marine camp, and blow it to bits with the Pelican's rockets and chainguns until there's no survivors, and then land and loot the place of ammo, grenades, and weapons. It's in effect in five minutes, we're all on break.

Woot Spitum
2007-01-21, 10:19 PM
One DM I had once, in order to resolve an impossible situation, had G-Man from Half-Life teleport in, announce that one of my fellow party members was actually Adrian Shepherd from Half-Life:Opposing Force, then gave him a sub-machine gun, a sniper rifle, and a rocket launcher.

He did, however, have the decency to kill off the campaign immediately afterwards. Of course that was the first campaign he'd ever run, and he had no previous D&D experience. He has since become an awesome DM:smallsmile: and has never done anything like that again.

2007-01-21, 10:24 PM
Well, my DM's EXPERIENCED. He's been doing this for about a year now. This is the first time he did this. He's been on an FPS binge: Halo, Half-Life, Timesplitters, anything. The gear's good, though. >:) Challenging due to low character levels, but the gear's good enough to keep us alive. We're basically uber with these guns. It was awesome at first, but since we're fighting OTHER characters from Halo in an attempt to mop-up, it's getting kinda boring...but if we start fighting space marines, and tyranids, and stuff, it might get interesting again. :)

2007-01-21, 10:30 PM
Bet you're waiting for the opportunity to loot a Crisis Battlesuit.

2007-01-21, 10:34 PM
:) How'd you know? Mino in a battlesuit: Doom-time.

Woot Spitum
2007-01-21, 10:34 PM
You could switch over to the Star Wars RPG. At least then you'd encounter things that have a reasonable chance of shooting down a Pelican. Just to add that element of danger without which D&D swiftly becomes boring.

2007-01-21, 10:40 PM
Eh; the thing about doing things like that is that the party has just gotten ahold of what could essentially be infinite money. I've played campaigns where peopel get ahold of high tech weapons: the first thing the PC's do is drop what they're doing, including quests, buy up alot of helpers and identify spells, and attempt to replicate the weapons and sell them to people.

Identify and analyze Dweomer make this pretty easy too due to magic.

Now, my guys are neutral so they go for the gold, and I doubt this would occure quite as much with heroic parties, but your guys are monsters-- they might be evil (if they have the capabilities to recruit helpers and use these weapons).

2007-01-21, 10:47 PM
Their not evil. The entire party's chaotic though. Neutral and Good. We're going against the monster stereotype. :) We have no intention of replicating the weapons and selling them: We have intentions of keeping the weapons, and replicating the ammo. >:)

2007-01-22, 12:18 AM
Alright, update. We just wasted the marine camp, which between the marines and the Covenant rebels which also had taken up residence, had a population of about 500. We killed all of them, landed, looted the place of EVERYTHING, be it instruction booklets for weapons, weapons, armor, ammo, or grenades. We also came across a curious little thing that appeared to be armor suited to the needs of each of our PCs. :) Kobolds in Marine body armor and helmets, anyone? Now, we have about a dozen of each gun in Halo and Halo 2, along with another pair of Energy Swords. We got portable recharge stations for each of our energy based weapons, and found a half-dozen Phantom dropships, which we also took, replacing the Pelican with one of them. Our stolen AI Cortana, from the chief's helmet, has been forced into telling us everything via magic, and has schooled us in marine tactics, strategies, formations, and even military words and terminology. We're now basically freelance monster-commandos. We went back to the local lord that hired us, and he refused to pay. He never intended to pay us, ordered us to surrender the equipment we found, divulge the location of the camp so that he might find more, and then throw us in the dungeon. When we wouldn't comply, he tried to sic his guards on us. Our wizard, whom was flying the Phantom we salvaged, promptly broke his ship through the wall to the room upon a codeword from our Ranger via radio, and wasted all the guards, the lord's personal wizard, and the lord's personal cleric with the Phantom's guns. :) Here's the exact transcript.
Party: *enters the throne room and we all bow, while decked out in snazzy marine armor*
Lord: Were you successful?
Goblin Ranger(who happens to be the leader): Yes, your problem's been dealt with accordingly. And we found his accomplices, whom we dealt with as well. As you can see, we found plenty of gear that they were using.
Lord: Excellent, you have done well. Now, surrender your equipment. Your under arrest.
Ranger: What?!
Lord: I never intended to actually pay you, filth. Now, do as I say!
Ranger: Backstabber! We will not surrender to the likes of you!
Lord: I see. Kill them.
Guards: *close in, wielding halberds, greatswords, and the like*
Ranger: *smirks*Imbeciles.*<---codeword!*
Phantom: *crashes through the wall*
Lord: What in the Nine Hells is that?!
Ranger: Our new ride. Waste em, Hamp!
Hamp(kobold wizard, and smartest guy on team): YEEEEEEEEEHAH!*fires phantom's guns and kills everything except his party, and the lord*
Me(mino barb/fighter): *aims a shotgun in the guy's face*Pay up so I can shoot ya.
Lord: Never!
Me: *shoots em and takes his money*


2007-01-22, 07:53 AM
Random. Awesome, and random.

2007-01-22, 12:48 PM
What are the stats on the sword? :-)

2007-01-22, 02:36 PM
Well, my DM's EXPERIENCED. He's been doing this for about a year now.

ROTFLMAO. I've been running my first campaign for longer than that and I still consider myself as using training wheels and being a novice. My, how standards are different.

2007-01-22, 04:04 PM
What are the stats on the sword? :-)
....Y'know, I just now realize that I NEVER CHECKED THE STATS ON ANY OF THE WEAPONS. All I know is this: THEIR FREAKIN' GOOD.

Weasel of Doom
2007-01-22, 06:50 PM
I'd be taking far shot and ranged feats for the guns

2007-01-22, 07:28 PM
Well, apparently, for the guns, we each automatically get 'rapid reload' and point-blank shot feats. Note: No one in my party EVER took those feats. The guns give em automatically. :)

F.H. Zebedee
2007-01-23, 12:55 AM
Can anybody say "Crossover from hell"?

2007-01-23, 09:55 PM
Crossover from hell. REALLY BIG crossover from hell.