[RIVALRY] The Song-Things of Love and Reason (rookie)

[Amotis]

Meeeeep-Ooop.

That is the sound of someone falling in love. Love happens sometimes unfortunately, despite the loud and often repeated complaints of the mind and the neighbors downstairs. On some occasions, usually a situation dealing with sunsets and roses in excess, such a noise is echoed by multiple Ooop's in which only dogs can hear. A curious phenomenon, one that caused the Great Westward Hound Migration, who fled away from the seven day Nymph Music Festival that accidentally never ended.

Some say this little noise is just a harmless little quirk, like the hiccup, though no one has a complete understanding of why it exactly happens. Some say it deals with ventricles and blood and how the earth rotates. Some say it deals with romance and kisses and wine. Some say it deals with the brain and logic and books. Other say magic. Of course, when thanked for their input and asked their names for scholarly purposes, they responded with magic as well. It seems mages have only one thing on their mind.

So over the years, between the meddling heads of priests and mages, books and bosoms, libraries and taverns, the "sound" was researched. This took a while. Love, the kind that is real and makes noise, apparently, is actually pretty rare. Through this diligent and unorthodox research, a very strange and bizarre type of answer was uncovered. It made sense.

This was strange because things dealing with love, especially "noise love", usually don't make much sense; it's a kind of law. Such things are usually covered in heavy musky scents and dreamy drawn-out metaphors that never really seem to come to a close. So when the answer came about, logically of all things, it was rejected and left to lie with the other falsities which claimed truth. If not for a young lawful bard, who could no longer progress in bardic levels but tried anyways, who came across the discarded solution to the question, we would not know what we know today.

What was discovered was that these noises were something to the effect of screaming while rapidly opening and closing a heavy door. That the strange occurrences of "noise love" were just snippets and samples of what was something much more. "Noise love" was apparently just a drop of infinity, the tip of the iceberg, the spark of the sun, the meaning of the metaphor. So much so that fully explaining the details of the answer would take long enough for the iceberg to melt, the sun to implode, and the author of the metaphor finally make a point (in that order).

The end being, something was discovered that explains and changed a lot of things. Something, or some things rather, that came to be called, The Song-Things of Love and Reason.

What is a song-thing you ask? Well they're like songs, but not. A sort of a cross between a creature, a song, and a lesser deity. And though it may sound like a mage's, a cleric's, and a bard's experimentation with devilweed and the prolonged and stuttered discussion that followed, it is far from it. Song-things are very real bodiless ethereal possessors, they have no physical form unless certain circumstances are met. And though only one of each is known to exist, the Song-Things of Love and Reason are thought to be eternal as long as they are sustained.

Their sustainment and power, ironically, is connected to the very essences they feed off of. Well, feed is a very vague physical term, lick is probably more appropriate. The Song-Things lick certain essences (Song-Thing of Love licks love and Song-Thing of Reason licks reason) from their hosts, sometimes to the point of death or mass confusion or a very confusing death. Like the deities that occasionally forget about them, the Song-Things exist solely on the licks they take from mortals. If there is nothing more to lick, they become no more.

And it's not so much that a problem arises, there are always problems, it was that a problem decided to show up unannounced, without previous consent to the other problems attending and to complete disregard to the rules set by the ministers of balance. So now, logically out of balance, there is a problem.

The Song-Things of Love and Reason not only lick and drain essences from mortals, they produce them and they are the only producers of them. Love and Reason aren't just emotions, they aren't mortal nature, they aren't gifts of the gods or anything like this, they're waste products. What happens is that the Song-Things of Love and Reason subconsciously produce the emotions we call Love and Reason, ejecting them out in the world with as much abandon and thought one does in a outhouse. So as the Song-Things lick and drain our Love and Reason, they produce it as well.

Now this isn't necessarily a problem, especially an rude uninvited one, right off the bat. And it wouldn't be except for two very badly placed conditions.
1) The Song-Things excretions of Love and Reason are produced at a set rate
2) Their licking consumption is not.

The responsible person would comment again that this is still not a problem and then go bustling off to work. It just seems like a manner of responsibility and a simple circle of creation and product. As long as neither the Song-Things of Love and Reason lust for power everything should be fine and dandy. Rivalry, however, isn't very responsible.

[Amotis]

So like all beginnings, the rivalry between the Song-Things is rooted in war. It is speculated that the Song-Things were once lovers that split over the argument of whether the color of the curtains were red or blue. What proceeded was the Great Color War of The Dark Nights of Even Darker Ends. Where the Song-Thing of Love and the Song-Thing of Reason recruited mass mortals to play dead on pretty fields while others looked at gardens and sung about summer. The cries of steel and the clash of pain lasted for many lifetimes. It was a scene to see, one that would be remembered for centuries to come and would be the cause of many vivid dreams. I guess it was a pretty garden.

So as this theory extends, the Song-Things wandered off after the Great Color War found their natural order, naturally. Incidentally, fighting is a pretty natural thing. So there was more fighting. Four kingdoms crumbled to the earth whence they came (the fifth, supported, stood until today, but that's another story). And though mortals claim proud responsibilities for these civilization genocides, written in texts and proudly displayed as dubbed glorious revolutions and crusades of good and evil, such events were far from the hands of mortals. Well...literally they were in the hands of mortals. But the thing with mortals is that what's in their hands and what's in their brains and hearts are separated by a mass of fat soaked flesh that doesn't translate messages very well. The Song-Things of Love and Reason and their Argument, are what were in the brains and hearts of mortals, swaying death and destruction like a pendulum on a wind-tossed ship. The thing with the Argument, however, is it the equivalent of trying to shoot a barrel full of guns with a fish. Or arguing with a rock about the effect of modern politics on age-old traditional moral settings. Or traditional moral settings. It just doesn't make sense.

What continues today is something of an extension of said Argument. Not that it's ceased or anything like this. Nor has the fight and fires of anger died down. It's extended from knowledgeable realm of the Argument into the forgotten and forgetful realms of Rivalry. When one traces a point from the present, one looks back one step. But when that step leads only to another step of the fight, and to another fight, and the cause is all the way back at step one but there isn't really any patience or memory to go that far. So when to some it is a question of who threw the first blow, it's really just a question of responsive retaliation.

The fight is slightly more subtle, as both Song-Things have found they can lick the most amount of power from a host when dealing with events and situations of the heart and mind. So blows of sword and steel have been exchanged with kisses and logical written choices. Whenever you see a couple locking eyes upon a treetop sunset, the Song-Thing of Love has made a stab. Whenever one chooses logic over personal feelings, whenever one places the burden of trust and hope aside and chooses reason, the Song-Thing of Reason parries. Whenever one observes the wheels of Love and Reason chugging, the fight drives on and the slash by slash commentary continues into eternity, the Song-Things most certainly behind the hands and licking like there was no tomorrow. Ironically.

Because something is happening. Okay, well something that deals with the immediate death of the world. Okay, yeah there's that...but not that one...or that one. This one. Something that deals with the immediate death of the world and The Song-Things of Love and Reason. Yes, it's important.

Love and Reason are disappearing from the mortal, slowly and with each battle, each power driven moment. And though it may not seem like a big deal, it is. The Song-Things of Love and Reason, so caught up in their Rivalry and ignorant to the repercussions of blind choice, are slowly draining their essences from this world. One would think that humanity could survive without Love and Reason, most certainly the former and that the latter is only a technicality. But then you would be wrong, because slowly, even right now, people are losing Love and Reason to the point of becoming stone. Rock. Slab. Really. At first people didn't notice. They just thought it was curious that their husband was spending days in the outhouse, frozen in the same position. But then they remembered that it was their husband and left him alone. But then the strange phenomenon grew. Statues became a common decoration. Then they blamed the mages as most logical people do. But then it started in places mages don't even bother to touch. People are turning to stone, and people don't know why. Confusion is amiss and unfortunately confusion doesn't solve problems.

The Song-Things of Love and Reason, however, keep fighting. Fighting like the world is setting and their battle is the final embrace of lovers. Reminiscent of a story of two men who stared locked into each other's eyes with anger and rivalry and only found themselves to fall into wells, ignorant of the heavens.

[Amotis]

The Lover
Template Requirements: Must be "In Love." Not "loving" or "love-filled." "In Love." Must have an Intelligence of 3 or higher. Must have an Object Of Affection (OOA) which has to be a creature with a Intelligence of 3 or higher.
Type: Creature gains the Lover subtype. Size is unchanged.
Speed: Unchanged.
Hit Dice and Hit Points: Unchanged.
Armor Class: Unchanged
Attack: Unchanged
Damage: Unchanged
Special Attacks: The Lover keeps all attacks of the base creature plus the following special attacks.
Loving Smite(Su) - Once per day, The Lover may attempt to smite an enemy who endangers, threatens, or insults the OOA. The Lover adds his charisma bonus to the attack roll and deals 1 extra point of damage per character level.
Special Qualities: The Lover keeps all qualities of the base creature plus the following special qualities.
Loving Shield (Sp) - The Lover and his OOA are constantly under the affect of Shield Other (as the spell). The range of effect is infinite and even crosses over planar barriers. Any transferred damage is accompanied by a Message(as the spell) with unlimited range as well as well as the scent of the OOA.
Lick'd Immunities (Ex) - Because of the physical position of The Song-Thing of Love in the Lover's body, the Lover is immune to critical hits and death by massive damage.
Lover's Quest (Su) - If at any point in the Lover's life the OOA is taken away, under pressure, kidnaped, or put in any danger away from the Lover, he must pursue the OOA as dictated in the Geas/Quest spell with unlimited duration. During this Lover's Quest, the Lover is granted a +1 Moral bonus to rolls and AC per 4 CR of the kidnapper and 1/opposed alignment DR per CR and 10 + 1/CR SR, 5 temp hp/ CR. If the OOA is captured by a dragon the Love bonuses extend to +20, DR to 30/-, SR to 30, and the Lover gains Armor Proficiency (Heavy) and Martial Weapon Proficiency even if he does not have the prerequisites, Immunity to the dragon's element, and a permanent Phantom Steed (as the spell) with the only the change being the steed is now all white
Love's Curse(Su) - The Lover is supernatural tied to the OOA. If the OOA dies, so does The Lover. If the OOA is cursed, poisoned, drained, or anything like this, The Lover takes the same effect without a save of his own. Protection of the OOA is vital. But then, so is the OOA "space." The affect of Love and The Song-Thing of Love is rubbed off on the Lover as well. Whenever the Lover uses a template ability, converses or physically touches the OOA, he must make a will save (DC 10+1 for every previous check) or become one step closer to CN with the OOA as the sole object of everything (as opposed to self).
Expulsion(Su) - To rid oneself of The Song-Thing of Love and thus the Lover template, the Lover must consume a Elixir of Love while gazing into the eyes of the OOA. The expulsion leaves the Lover fatigued and smelling like roses. A Medium Fire Elemental in the form of the OOA appears and attacks anyone in sight. If defeated the monster disappears and The Song-Thing of Love possesses another being. Though Expulsion does not affect the feelings of the Lover and OOA, there still might be complaints of change and then marriage council.
Abilities: Con +2, Cha +2.
Saves: Will +2
Skills: The Lover gains no new skills.
Challenge Rating: Same as base creature +1
Alignment: Any
Advancement: By character class
Level Adjustment: +2


The Reasoned
Template Requirements: Must be of lawful alignment. Must have an intelligence above 3 and a wisdom score 12 or above.
Type: Creature gains the Reasoned subtype. Size is unchanged.
Speed: Unchanged.
Hit Dice and Hit Points: Unchanged.
Armor Class: Unchanged
Attack: Unchanged
Damage: Unchanged
Special Attacks: The Reasoned keeps all attacks of the base creature plus the following special attacks.
Touch of Reason(Su) – At a touch attack 1/day, The Reasoned may force a Will save (DC 10+Wisdom mod+1/2 char level) to make any creature with the subtype of shape changer revert to its original form. The Reasoned may also use Touch of Reason to dispel magic (a targeted dispel) with a dispel check of 1d20+character level (max +15).
Special Qualities: The Reasoned keeps all qualities of the base creature plus the following special qualities.
True Seeing (Sp) – Once per week the Reasoned can activate the spell of the same name for 10 minutes.
True Strike(Sp) – Once per day the Reasoned can activate the spell of the same name.
True Resurrection (Sp) - Once per day…– yeah right. No, he doesn't get true ress. Just no.
Desire's Conflict (Su) - The Reasoned may not attempt a task that cannot be achieved by taking a 15 on a skill check or attack roll. This is a DM driven ability.
Lick'd Immunities (Ex) – Because of the physical position of the Song-Thing of Reason, the Reasoned is immune to Charm effects as well as gaining a +2 moral bonus to will saves.
The Hunt for Truth (Su) - Every level gained after gaining the Reasoned Template, the Reasoned must spend all acquired skill points into knowledge skills.
Expulsion (Su) – To rid oneself of the Song-Thing of Reason and thus the Reasoned template, the Reasoned must hit himself on the head with a Potion of Owl’s Wisdom. Dealing 1d4 bludgeoning damage. The expulsion leaves the Reasoned with a slight headache. A Medium Air Elemental appears and attacks anyone in sight. If defeated the monster disappears and The Song-Thing of Reason possesses another being.
Abilities: +4 Wis
Saves: Will +2
Skills: The Reasoned gains all the knowledge skills as class skills.
Challenge Rating: Same as base creature +1
Alignment: Any
Advancement: By character class
Level Adjustment: +2

[Amotis]

Example Characters

John the Lover:

John and Mary were in love. They were born that way. John was a fisherman and Mary was a seamstress, both noble professions that brought fish and bread to the table to feed the husband and wife. One day, John felt the strange sensation run into his heart, it felt a bit heavier, like something was in it, but at the same time, it felt lighter, like his sins and problems were lifted and replaced with something more simpler and driven. John began to see things in a new light. Well, it was more that he was seeing in a new darkness. John's vision tunneled as he began to express his love for his wife in more extravagant creative ways that he never did before. Flowers, days of rest, bad poetry, eye contact; it was all very new and loving for the couple. Then one day John, while stumbling tired home from work but with a smile on his face that he would meet his wife soon, tripped and fell. His head hit the floor with a sickening crunch and fell unconscious. Later, and in more modern days, a doctor would diagnosed John with a major concussion, that left untreated, would slowly break down the brains barriers and drive the man insane. But John was carried home, the Song-Thing of Love fled from the doomed to be crazed man, and John was laid into bed with some leeches and old water tonic. Free of the Song-Thing, John was left to his own mind, his own heart and a brain crushing IQ draining condition. Ironically, John's behavior continued and Mary didn't notice. He does think he's a sparrow of the south and that doorknobs are his acorns that he must collect for the "fearful horrible nasty nasty winter", he also seems to exhibit the same habits when he was "in Love." Huh.

Bob the Reasoned:

Bob was a teacher as well as a student. He felt that knowledge and wisdom were separate things, that luck and hope were distractions and though commendable, useless in the end. He wasn't rude and he wasn't disrespectful, such things were also distractions. Bob was a happy man, sure of the choices he made, of the food he ate, of the air he breathed. One day, Bob felt a funny feeling in his head. It made him feel more driven, that the choices he would make would be easy as they would be laid out before him and all he would have to do is walk the way that was dictated. It was like a protective box surrounded his brain, sealed and air tight, nothing in and nothing out, safe from the temptations and distractions of swaying emotions. Then one day Bob found himself in a particular situation. While traveling through the desert, Bob was robbed and left without food, water, his horse, and only a tiny bit of gear. So here Bob was, stranded and starving, no food and no water. A neo-Marxist would bring in ideas of an emissary victim as well as the balancing factors of social interactions that deal with these kinds of situation, ideas that explain. Bob knew of these things and as a logical person, there was only really one answer to the problem. Plunging a dagger into his belly, Bob solved the problem. The Song-Thing of Reason wandered off.

[Amotis]

Working the Song-Things into Your Game/Author's Notes:

At first the Song-Things, and their stories behind them, sound silly and humorous, far from what most people want to use in their campaign. A mood killer at best. And while they are humorous and overblown, there is a purpose. To use such things at first, a brave DM can give the players one of the templates, which ever one matches best. Perhaps an accident involving an elixir of love or something like this. What continues after this is a bit of giggling and throwing the template over the shoulder and forgetting about it. Or rather, just using it and roleplaying at it's face value. As the game progresses, however, the DM can slowly incorporate learning what the Song-Things (and thus the template) truly are. This can be done by many ways, including the rag-tag researchers roaming around, the statue stone people and the spread, or maybe the Song-Things (which is inside them) subtly lets them know. This is followed by more rolling of the eyes as well as at the absurd nature of the Song-Things and their history. Maybe more giggling, I don't know as I'm not really sure of the masculinity level of your group. Anyway, but this is when the DM can give it a turn. See while the overblown and humors nature of the templates, the rivalry, and the emotions themselves is funny and all it is really a satire upon the very things it discusses. A wagging finger at extremes, at blindness, at love, reason, and rivalry. Just read into it as a satire, an absurdist’s view on the very things that make us absurd. And while the start may be filled with groans and giggles, if executed properly, "oohh...'s" of suddenly "getting it" should end it.

That being said, this is probably one of the more mechanical home brew things I've ever created. Comments and helpful hints would be most welcome. Thanks for reading. :smallbiggrin:

[PhoeKun]

Well, this is just silly.

A suggestion: you may want to stat out John and Bob, to give a better idea of what these templates look like in action. It may just be that I'm tired right now, but I'm not 10% sure of the LA on these templates...

[Amotis]

Nor am I. And stating them out will just be adding templates to commoners. You don't have to be a hero to be choosen. Though I might do it 'cause the crunch will help.

[PhoeKun]

Right. I'm not saying you need to make grand heroes, but there's a reason every template WotC produces has a sample creature. It's just easier to see what a template can do once it's applied.