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elliott20
2007-01-31, 10:26 AM
1. The innkeeper: Helpful, friendly, and usually faceless unless he's actually going to **** you over somehow

2. the blacksmith: 99% of the time, it's a dwarf, or it's a Griswald clone.

3. the kungfu master: almost always an unassuming looking old man who looks unkept and docile. Usually has an uncanny resemblance to Pai Mei from Kill Bill. Almost always the greatest example of the Inverse Ninja rule.

4. the reclusive mage: this is the guy that will send you on a quest to save the world when he's probably got 3x the class levels of all your characters combined.

5. The town guard: red shirts of the d&d world, exist solely to get killed off by the baddies or by the players.

6. The farmer: decrepit, poor, and totally not shy to ask you to risk your life and save the village for no payment.

7. The DM-PC: The DM's inserted character who follows or leads the party around, who will often without any remorse often take over the storyline, and relegate all the PCs to sidekick status.

Ebonwoulfe
2007-01-31, 10:36 AM
8. Farmer's Daughter - she's going to have to be around 20 years old, stunningly beautiful, and doesn't smell like cow manure. Must have an abysmal sense motive.

Bryn
2007-01-31, 10:52 AM
9. The Pickpocket: Probably either young or a halfling, and possibly works for the Thieves' Guild. Either seen picking a pocket or attempts to do so to one of the characters.

Shhalahr Windrider
2007-01-31, 11:23 AM
10. Insane Cultist: A real true believer. +100 ad-hoc bonus to level checks to resist Intimidation and similar bonus to Diplomacy DCs. Not that you'd be able to understand his mad ravings anyway.

pestilenceawaits
2007-01-31, 11:26 AM
11. herbalist/ sage guy.
12. the guy with a burlap sack. (inside joke anytime I have a nameless nobody npc the party wants his name so I keep a list of guy with burlap sack names)

Deus Mortus
2007-01-31, 11:27 AM
13. The good king: The guy who can keep an entire nation together by love and lots of grouphugs.

Shhalahr Windrider
2007-01-31, 11:36 AM
14: The Bureaucrat: Supposedly on the same side as the PCs, yet the PCs want to kill him anyway. Loves procedure. Has "Jerk"* written on his forhead.

[hr]* Actually, it's a much stronger word, but this is a family-friendly board. :smallwink:

Deus Mortus
2007-01-31, 11:37 AM
15 The farm hero: Born as a farmer's son and finds out he has mysterious powers and is chosen by destiny to rid the land of evil.

elliott20
2007-01-31, 11:41 AM
16. Bill Lumbergh: "Hiya Peter.... why don't you just, go ahead and slay that dragon for me, mkay? Super, thanks."

Shhalahr Windrider
2007-01-31, 11:53 AM
17. Trodgor (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail58.html): He's a man... no, he's a dragon-man, er, maybe he's just a dragon that likes to burninate the countryside, the pesants, and their thatched-roof cottages.

18. 34. Moved to a lower position for the sake of re-numbering.

Lord Iames Osari
2007-01-31, 11:54 AM
18.The scheming vizier. Self-explanatory.

Golthur
2007-01-31, 12:07 PM
17. Trodgor (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail58.html): He's a man... no, he's a dragon-man, er, maybe he's just a dragon that likes to burninate the countryside, the pesants, and their thatched-roof cottages.

And the Trogdor comes in the NIIIIIiIIIIIGHT! :amused:

dorshe1
2007-01-31, 12:47 PM
I usually run in a large military campaign, so....

19. Hardass Sarge - You know, the one that can chew whiskey and piss nails... or something like that.

20. Incompetent Relative - Related to the General and is always captured with important plans (think Princess Leia). Promoted because of relationship to leaders.

21. Oddly quirky intelligence agent - the one that follows the group around spouting off random FBI information. PCs can't tell if he's a good guy or bad guy.

Deus Mortus
2007-01-31, 01:03 PM
22. Insane scientist - nuff' said!

Runolfr
2007-01-31, 01:39 PM
23. Spoiled brat princess

GolemsVoice
2007-01-31, 01:54 PM
24. The man who makes the bubbles in your medieval whirlpool. The story behind this is that the party in which I am playing got a palace as a gift, and this palace also had a swimming pool. As we all went straight to the pool, I suggested a slave to stick his head into the pool and blow bubbles. He's now a running gag.
25. Alrik, Redgar, Krunk, Borg-the-Orc. Big, dump, and ready to smash faces. They are the warriors, whenever they are needed.
26. The mindflayer with the russian accent. Happened to me. Creepy.
27. The utterly chliche member of the culture we are at the moment. A dark skinned Alladin with black beard, scimitar and turban, a wise Indian shaman, a Kung-Fu ubermonk who ate wisdom for breakfast. A eager, blonde fighter build like a lighthouse and always ready to fight. The drunk, angry dwarve... and so on.

Piedmon_Sama
2007-01-31, 02:57 PM
28. The Orc With a Huge Axe Who's Really a Rogue With Lots and Lots of Ranks In Bluff. OK, this one's probably fairly unique to my games but my players fell for it so hard. They think the orc is a lug with Int and Wis 6 and let him tag along, only for him to drop the axe, snatch their loot and run off at the most innoportune moment. (Like, "the Red Dragon snaps open its eyes and notices you" innoportune.)

29. The High-Level Elf Bastard. Another NPC that I probably overuse. This is an Elf who's either some super-general-kill-guy or a cosmic-powered-wizard-master who won't bother to save humans because "they're just going to live a few more years and die anyway." My players have learned to stop going to Elves for help. =p

30. The Horrifically Scarred Badass. It's a general rule of thumb in my world that you don't get far in violent careers without picking up some nasty scars to show for it. My players like to joke about the "law of scarring" where the more horrific your injuries, the more badass you likely are. Beware triple amputees with no lower jaw!

SpiderBrigade
2007-01-31, 03:03 PM
Beware triple amputees with no lower jaw!It's like Vader and Malak combined! That IS badass.

clericwithnogod
2007-01-31, 03:15 PM
28. The Orc With a Huge Axe Who's Really a Rogue With Lots and Lots of Ranks In Bluff.


I had a character that was a half-orc with a huge sword who's really a rogue with lots and lots of ranks in bluff. I'd bring him back to my current campaign, but it's the same DM and I think he'd develop a twitch.

31. The gang/clan/guild member that you have to knock the snot out of to gain membership in an organization.

32. The evil mastermind that leaves a trail back to his lair where he waits in his inner sanctum with his most powerful henchmen because he wants to let a group of adventurers tear through his home and headquarters looting and killing his lesser henchmen rather than killing them someplace on the journey to his lair....

Max Graeves
2007-01-31, 05:18 PM
33. The down-on-his-luck npc looking for a group of heroes to help him in his time of need...but ends up being mercilessly mentally and verbally abused until he cries, all for a quick laugh. I'm sure he's supposed to serve some other role, but that's usually how it ends up in my games.

Shhalahr Windrider
2007-01-31, 05:24 PM
Okay, I already posted this one, but since it was a simu-edit, it threw the numbering off. Since I am sufficiently anal-retentive for it to bug me, I will re-post it now with an appropriate number:

34. The Megalomaniac: He will rule it all unless the PCs stop him. Often posses a dash of "Archnemesis" as well.

Maxymiuk
2007-01-31, 07:08 PM
35) The pitiful goblin/kobold/other demirace bullied by the PC's into showing them the way in exchange for his worthless life.

36) The random encounter - any monster that suddenly shows up for no adequately explained reason just to fight the PC's.

37) The self-important guard - usually blocks the PC's way at the gate leading into a city and demands their business there. Gets beaten up a lot.

Just Alex
2007-01-31, 07:20 PM
36: The friendly spy: Whenever the party is completely stumped on how to take the next step in the adventure, someone can point them in the right direction.

clericwithnogod
2007-01-31, 07:48 PM
39. The healbot. The (for some reason usually Gnome) cleric or cleric/wizard/mystic theurge that fills the role of healer/utility caster in parties without one.

purepolarpanzer
2007-01-31, 08:22 PM
40. The Chieftain- The leader you have to convince to help you, more often than not by taking some side quest whihc nets you little treasure except for 1 big item. When you return, he is amazed and fully supports you.

41. The Bandit- Random bandit leader who you defeat on the way to where your going.

42. The Random Commando- the Random soldier NPC who either serves its purpose by dieing and illustrating danger or guiding you to a point.

Lord Iames Osari
2007-01-31, 08:25 PM
20. Incompetent Relative - Related to the General and is always captured with important plans (think Princess Leia). Promoted because of relationship to leaders.

Since when has Princess Leia been incompetent?:smallconfused:

Mewtarthio
2007-01-31, 10:04 PM
Since when has Princess Leia been incompetent?:smallconfused:

Since when is she related to anyone important? Besides Luke and Vader, since nobody knows about that. And Bail Organa, since he dies in like the first thirty minutes and I'm not sure he was all that important anyway.

Red Sky Knight
2007-01-31, 11:04 PM
43. The shady patron sitting at the back of the tavern

Ravyn
2007-01-31, 11:10 PM
44. The snakebit demon hunter/healer. What can go wrong for her will, in as spectacular a fashion as possible; fortunately, this bad luck doesn't extend to the rest of the group, and she can always be counted on to heal them up.

45. The amusing child-NPC. Plothook, comic relief, smallscale exposition, and plays a mean game of Go Fish; usually the apprentice of a local healer. My players love him.

CockroachTeaParty
2007-01-31, 11:13 PM
46. The salty sea captain. Lets the PCs on his boat. Always ready to tell the tale of how he lost his hand/leg/eye/coat/brother/virginity to a giant shark/crocodile/whale/legendary pirate/storm/ghost ship. Always goes down with the ship.

Red Sky Knight
2007-01-31, 11:52 PM
47. The inept messenger - hes hard of hearing, and misinterprets the message to be delivered. having picked up only 1 in 10 words, he misconstrues the spirit of the message altogether. eg; the legendary pirate lost his virginity...errr...going down on the...err...salty sea captain...i think....

Ishkahl
2007-02-01, 12:14 AM
48. The Insane Caster - The random, babbling, totally insane spellcaster that leads the players on a mission just because he plays those type of games. Probably did too much LSD in wizard school.

El Honcho
2007-02-01, 05:00 AM
after playing The Bards Tals

49. The Chosen One - a young guy with a big ego running around and telling everyone that he is the chosen one, the only one who can solve the quest. Usually killed soon by a low-level Monster or even the PCs, if they are in a bad mood.

dorshe1
2007-02-01, 08:47 AM
Since when is she related to anyone important? Besides Luke and Vader, since nobody knows about that. And Bail Organa, since he dies in like the first thirty minutes and I'm not sure he was all that important anyway.

Bail Organa was one of the biggest leaders in the rebel alliance, hence poor Alderaan gets blown to pieces as an example. Leia spends the whole first movie being incompetent. Getting captured, getting them stuck in a trash compactor, kissing her brother. She was the whole plot hook for the first movie.

Tengu
2007-02-01, 09:13 AM
15 The farm hero: Born as a farmer's son and finds out he has mysterious powers and is chosen by destiny to rid the land of evil.

Isn't this role reserved for the PCs?

Deus Mortus
2007-02-01, 09:35 AM
Isn't this role reserved for the PCs?

I mainly mod games and when they need party member when playing solo, NPC's like that are the easy way out :P

elliott20
2007-02-01, 10:22 AM
50. the fanboy: usually a cohort that one of the PCs acquire after they've gained some fame. Said cohort usually strangely compliant to most abuse that the PCs give out and is usually forgotten until they become convenient.

Deus Mortus
2007-02-01, 10:56 AM
51: The Projectile: Usually a short race who is either heavy enough to do some damage to walls or annoying enough to be used as red paint.

Green Bean
2007-02-01, 11:18 AM
52- The farmer's son. Exists soley to be captured by goblins, kobolds, or orcs. Low level parties must go in to rescue him, because for some reason a roving band of monstrous killers would rather carry him along and feed him

Maxymiuk
2007-02-01, 11:52 AM
52- The farmer's son. Exists soley to be captured by goblins, kobolds, or orcs. Low level parties must go in to resue him, because for some reason a roving band of monstrous killers would rather carry him along and feed him

That's obviously in order to make him nice and plump for when they have their monthly barbeque cave party.

Green Bean
2007-02-01, 11:54 AM
That's obviously in order to make him nice and plump for when they have their monthly barbeque cave party.

:thog:#1- This good. I try some of breast?
:thog:#2- Sorry. Is male.

Piedmon_Sama
2007-02-01, 12:59 PM
53. The Corrupt Civil Guard - They're always in whatever tavern the PCs happen to be holed up in, abusing their authority and terrorizing the locals. Of course once the PCs do the heroic thing and clean their clock, suddenly they're fugitives and have to flee the city.....

Orzel
2007-02-01, 01:10 PM
54. The half elf hater- Hates humans, Hates elves, Hates rocks, Hates Mondays, Hates you and all your friends.

55. the lucky ranger- his favored enemies are you and your allies 'til you get out of "his" forest.

elliott20
2007-02-01, 01:48 PM
56. Goth guy: his soul is darker than a moonless night spent in a nailed coffin, where eternal pain wrenches at his every being. Sometimes, it's not an NPC though.

JediNite
2007-02-01, 02:21 PM
57) The squirrels.

What? A man can't have a forest populated by semi-sentient squirrels?

58) Large, angry, insane, alcoholic, monk.

Yes, yes it can be done. Quite legally, in fact - partying, when done in moderation, is still lawful. And he's not necessarily a drunken master, either. Again, it helps if you have my campaign setting - I can back up the Russian accent with the fact that he's actually Russian.

59) More kobolds than can usually be deemed sane.

Kobolds are my pet race. They aren't normal D&D kobolds, rather a variant 'noble kobold' race I wrote up. I just like the voices...
"We represent the trapmaking guild!"

60) A BBEG wizard with 25 Intelligence and 3 Wisdom.

Actually, more to the point...
60a) An unnatural preponderance of characters with 3 Wisdom. Or 3 Intelligence.

What can I say? In both cases, the character is capable of functioning. They just need more... supervision... than usual.

-Jedi

Ted_Stryker
2007-02-01, 03:31 PM
8. Farmer's Daughter - she's going to have to be around 20 years old, stunningly beautiful, and doesn't smell like cow manure. Must have an abysmal sense motive.
8b. Or be a succubus in alternate form.

Max Graeves
2007-02-03, 05:38 PM
Large, angry, insane, alcoholic, monk.
I had a drunk dwarven CG chaos monk (helps bypass that pesky lawful restriction) named Friar Fergus O'Flagon; rude, abrassive Irish Dwarf who loved nothing more than getting into bar-fights. I even put a bunch of ranks in Profession: Brew Master.

clockwork warrior
2007-02-03, 11:35 PM
the god in a mortal form who just happens to be the same peasant that you just hit with your club

Folie
2007-02-04, 06:16 AM
after playing The Bards Tals

49. The Chosen One - a young guy with a big ego running around and telling everyone that he is the chosen one, the only one who can solve the quest. Usually killed soon by a low-level Monster or even the PCs, if they are in a bad mood.

Interesting...I kinda want to write a book that begins with the prophesied Chosen One rushing up the steps of the dark fortress of Doom to engage the BBEG in a final decisive combat, only to accidentally trip, fall, and break his neck. The story will actually be about the Chosen One's friends and companions, who are basically fleeing from the BBEG and his hordes while trying to pick up the pieces of their shattered hopes and dreams.

Tengu
2007-02-04, 06:49 AM
61. The guards with personalities

Spend their time on their shift playing cards and talking about mundane, everyday matters, usually involving their families and loved ones. Unless your group consists of evil characters, expect the players to feel a sudden surge of sympathy to these guys and try to avoid them without being detected and/or use nonlethal ways of dealing with them.

Green Bean
2007-02-04, 07:06 AM
62. The proud orc chieftan who teaches the PCs that not all orcs are evil, and that they in fact have a long and rich heritage.

63. The racist knight who refuses to believe the PCs when they tell him that the orcs are not evil.

HeinleinFan
2007-02-05, 03:43 AM
My campaign's going to be fairly specialized, so some of these can't be applied to all settings.

64. Messenger / Spy / Guardsman. Who said Awakened animals can't serve a cause? Hint: if you were to play in my campaign, don't kick the dog by the town guardhouse. He'll eat you - and in a random magic item roll he once got a + 4 Holy Speed set of fangs.

65. Clerk. Most of these do their jobs just fine, but there's always one that's daydreaming and only half pays attention to you when you talk to him / her.

66. Curious kid. Follows you, asks questions, may be dirt poor - but may also be good friends with #64.

67. Son / daughter or grandson / granddaughter of retired adventurer. Usually knows the area really well, and can serve as a guide in return for advice, food, pocketchange, and the privelige of basking in the PCs reflected glory.

daggaz
2007-02-05, 09:25 AM
68. The scantily clad prostitute, usually with a face (and personality) that looks like she painted it with 'color spray.' She is always the first NPC that somebody in your group will seek out upon entering a town.

MightyMuenster
2007-02-05, 09:43 AM
69. The bartender, of course. My games tend to have a history of the bartender being somewhat of a God-figure. You don't mess with him. If you do, you may as well write up a new character sheet; he takes no damage and always carries a large weapon. And this group has a sick sense of humor when it comes to torture... once a Wookie was shaved and almost castrated by a malfunctioning medical droid.

daggaz
2007-02-05, 09:46 AM
Erm... the bartender was like in the top ten.

MightyMuenster
2007-02-05, 09:55 AM
Ah, but it wasn't. Innkeeper, but no bartender.

elliott20
2007-02-05, 10:04 AM
69. The bartender, of course. My games tend to have a history of the bartender being somewhat of a God-figure. You don't mess with him. If you do, you may as well write up a new character sheet; he takes no damage and always carries a large weapon. And this group has a sick sense of humor when it comes to torture... once a Wookie was shaved and almost castrated by a malfunctioning medical droid.
Any barfly will tell you that the relationship between him and his bartender is holy.

daggaz
2007-02-05, 10:15 AM
ahh.. well I guess Im just thinking of your typical country inn, where the Innkeep *IS* the bartender. If they are lucky, they have a serving wench or two as well, usually daughters..

elliott20
2007-02-05, 10:19 AM
I think I've seen certain movies from Vivid that start that way...

Neon Knight
2007-02-05, 10:39 AM
70. Mr. Red shirt
Purpose: Dieing to increase dramatic tension or to reveal resetting trap of serious ouchies. Number Avaliable: Innumerable.

Rama_Lei
2007-02-05, 02:10 PM
71. Deux Ex Machina. Nuff' Said.

LotharBot
2007-02-05, 02:31 PM
72. The powerful noble who's actually a beholder, ogre mage, rakshasa, or similar creature in disguise, and keeps sending the PCs on quests trying to get them killed.

73. The corrupt judge / guard captain whose sole purpose in life is to give the PCs a chance to level up by breaking out of jail

74. The local paladin whose good intentions keep making a mess of town politics

75. The creepy cleric of Wee Jas, who seems to have an unnatural interest in what you last killed, how it looked when it was dead, "can you bring me the body?", etc.

76. The insane druid who sends waves of bears or wolves or what have you after the PC's

Wolf53226
2007-02-05, 02:35 PM
77. This Guy
For some reason our plans almost always start "So....we get this guy...", problem is, he usually beats us to a pulp. High level fighter/ranger/paladin/knight of some sort who just happens to be slumming it right where we are looking to nab somebody.

Viscount Einstrauss
2007-02-05, 02:54 PM
78- The extremely naive but immensly powerful and good natured keeper of the forest. In mine, it's a proxie werebear.

79- The quintuple-crosser. His bluff and disguise checks are almost godly, and the players never really know which side he's working. Can be used as either a villain or a hero in the end (like the players will really know the difference by then anyway).

80- The plot-critical raving old man.

81- The identical twin brother/sister that the PC doesn't remember because the player never came up with that. Goatee and evilness optional.

82- The powerful warrior/wizard that could probably kill the BBEG and save the world on his own, but really doesn't feel like it. Really, just there for the PC's to gawk at.

83- The "Check out this sweet build I just figured out, guys!" NPC. The DM will initiate a fight solely so he can show off the NPC's statistical talents. WARNING- the DM gets a bigger kick out of this then the PC's.

Maxymiuk
2007-02-05, 06:30 PM
84: The "mouth" - any NPC, but usually a guide of some sort, that the GM inserts into the party to serve as his means to answer the questions characters may have, tell them the bits they missed in their enthusiasm to start hitting things, point things out, make fun of people, or stop the party from doing something bloody stupid (nice GM option) without breaking versimilitude.

Piedmon_Sama
2007-02-05, 06:38 PM
85. The Burly Teamster - Anytime the PCs take an assignment to protect or in some way deal with a wagon caravan, they'll probably deal with this guy. The wagonmaster is almost invariably fat, bald, and equipped with a pair of huge moustaches. It's practically a uniform.

Ivius
2007-02-05, 06:56 PM
86. The Brave Coward- The character, usually comic relief, is utterly fearless until there is actually something to fear. Usually skinny, covered in armor, and an NPC class.

Piedmon_Sama
2007-02-05, 07:07 PM
87. The Celebrity Guest Star - Just what it sounds like. Usually under a thinly disguised pseudonym, figures from H.P Lovecraft to Frank Sinatra have made the occasional appearance in my game. Usually found at the town tavern/inn, usually a high-level NPC class ('cept for the time I guest-starred Beowulf ^^). Usually present just long enough for everyone to get bored with the joke but me.

Draz74
2007-02-05, 07:28 PM
72. The powerful noble who's actually a beholder, ogre mage, rakshasa, or similar creature in disguise, and keeps sending the PCs on quests trying to get them killed.


"Pay no attention to that ... thing behind the curtain! Yeah, the one that looks like a big floating ball with too many eyes!"



75. The creepy cleric of Wee Jas, who seems to have an unnatural interest in what you last killed, how it looked when it was dead, "can you bring me the body?", etc.


"Beat it. I might kill whoever you want me to treat."
"He's already dead."
"He is, eh? I'll take a look."

Talyn
2007-02-05, 07:45 PM
Hehe, I love the Arrogant Elf, and I've used the Mouth a couple of time.

88. The brash youngster

Usually has a bad case of hero-worship (or a crush, if the opposite gender) on a PC and just enough levels in a heroic class to be not quite useless. Tends to charge into battle/volunteer for the tough jobs and need support and/or rescuing. Will occasionally save the day. Also, cooks and carries the bags.

I had a really fun Brash Youngster NPC paladin whom the local priest fobbed off on the PCs to get him out of his hair. Over the course of a few gaming sessions, one of the PCs really came to be a mentor to him, and the NPC died heroically saving one of the party's spellcasters from a rampaging berserk ogre chieftain. And the party (who REALLY didn't want him there in the first place) all chipped in with money and a houseruled-on-the-spot XP donation to get him rezzed.

Truly, a shining moment in the history of NPCs.

Green Bean
2007-02-06, 04:56 PM
89. The Abuse Monkey

Normally indistiinguishable from a generic enemy, this NPC is elevated when a PC does 100+ damage to it in a single hit, regardless of the amount of HP it actually had left. Typically a low level creature, such as a goblin or kobold, it nevertheless has a permanent place in the hearts of the PCs (i.e. 'Hey, remember that time you did like a million damage to that one orc?')