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View Full Version : D&D 3.x Other [3.5 Discipline] Sanity’s Eclipse – Combat from Beyond Reality.



Zakaroth
2014-03-03, 06:34 PM
Designers notes:
• The Far Realm has always fascinated me, as did the ToB. So, I decided to work on a Far Realm oriented "martial discipline". What I didn't like about the original disciplines was the poor scaling of maneuvers, many were simply replaced by a similar but stronger version. I prefer all maneuvers to be viable at any level of play. To address this I made the maneuvers from this discipline scale, at least to some extend. One of the ways it is implemented is a feature called Dormant Power, which provides a small passive enhancement if you have the maneuver prepared. Another scaling method is synergy with Aberrant feats, these interact with some stances and maneuvers.
• I hope to get some feedback on balance, as some stuff might be off. Suggestions for maneuvers, fluff (sadly I'm pretty poor at writing fluff), wording and tuning would be much appreciated. If you simply don't like something in here, also please tell me. I'm still not sure about some maneuvers and there is certainly room for improvement. Thanks in advance!


The Sanity's Eclipse Discipline
http://orig06.deviantart.net/6548/f/2008/282/e/8/chaos_mage_by_sergon.jpg

A truly unearthly form brought from beyond the boundaries of reality. It can hardly be called a discipline; it is better described as the natural way for the unnatural. It is extremely rare to come across an entity that applies these manifestations, and even rarer to be able to tell the tale. Those who have survived are often reduced to a mere shimmer of the person they were, having their mind twisted and body corrupted, unable to produce a single coherent word. Sanity’s Eclipse origin makes it so that it can only be realized by those who are tainted by the Far Realm or, at the very least, have some form of alien heritage. Therefore, these maneuvers cannot be acquired through feats such as martial study or martial stance – unless the previously named requirement is met. The combat abilities of Sanity’s Eclipse focus on disruption, grapples and dealing mental ability damage. No one with a lucid mind is save against those who have acquired the power of Sanity’s Eclipse.

• The key skill for Sanity’s Eclipse is Knowledge (the Planes). Sanity’s Eclipse favored weapons include the morning star, spiked chain and natural weapons such as tentacles and claws.
• Unnatural Presence: All Sanity’s Eclipse stances provide the unnatural presence aura. These abhorrent forms envelop you in a strange disdaining energy that seeps from your being, inciting a feeling of eeriness and unease in those around you. All living creatures within 30 feet are unsettled by your presence. You receive a madness penalty on your social skills (Bluff, Disguise, Diplomacy and Handle Animal) equal to half your initiator level, when interacting with humanoids and nature associated beings. Especially animals are strongly affected by this aura, they shun you at all cost and panic or lash out defensively when forced to confront you. Magic animals, fey and druids immediately pick up on your presence, causing them to adept a more hostile composure towards you.
• Dormant Power: Some maneuvers will provide you with a constant beneficial effect for as long as you have the maneuver readied and are in a Sanity’s Eclipse stance (even if the maneuver is expended).
• Wisdom Damage: Wisdom damage dealt by maneuvers is caused by incomprehensible images of Far Realm that can only be interpreted by creatures with an natural Intelligence score of 6 or higher.

1ST LEVEL
• Alien Psych: (Counter) – Shroud your mind with horrors.
• Marrow Rend: (Strike) – Rend your foe and emit disrupting ripples.
• Murmurs of Insane Truth: (Stance) – Strange whispers warn you of impending danger.
• Vast Reach: (Boost) – Increases the reach and strength of your attacks.

2ND LEVEL
• Skein the Skin: (Strike) – Spawn entangling tendrils from your foe’s skin.
• Weapons of Twisted Flesh: (Boost) – You morph your arm in an alien weapon.

3RD LEVEL
• Awakening: (Boost) – Awaken the eyes of Xoriat to enhance your vision.
• Tongues of the Great Wurm: (Strike) – Fire spiked tendrils from your arm to pierce your foe from a distance.
• Xenomorphia: (Stance) – Focus the mutagenic powers of the Far Realm into your own flesh.

4TH LEVEL
• Breach the Inertia: (Counter) – Dodge an attack or enhance a charge by breaking the laws of physics.
• Maddening Insight: (Boost) – Gain strange insight in your attacks.
• Rage of Betrayed Flesh: (Strike) – Slam with gruesome power, instilling fear into your foes.

5TH LEVEL
• Conduit of Xoriat: (Stance) – Emit an aura that breaches reality.
• Tendrils of Corruption: (Strike) – Lash out with a corrupting tentacle attack.
• Xenomorphic Regeneration: (Counter) – Absorb an incoming attack and start to regenerate.

6TH LEVEL
• Glimpse and Fracture: (Strike) – Rot the mind and the body will follow.
• Siphon Impulse: (Counter) – Siphon the strength from your opponent’s attacks and enhance your own.

7TH LEVEL
• Agony Warp: (Strike) – Warp your foe’s body into a dysfunctional form.
• Pinnacle of Crumbling Sanity: (Stance) – Become a beacon of madness.
• Whispers from Beyond: (Counter) – Counter a spell and corrupt the caster.

8TH LEVEL
• Fang of the Uvuudaum: (Strike) – Spawn a fanged tentacle that attacks your opponent’s sanity.
• Gyre of the Unraveler: (Strike) – Reshape the battlefield into an alien landscape that disrupts your opponents.
• Scorn Reality: (Boost) – Bend the rules of reality and gain the ability to teleport short distances.

9TH LEVEL
• Maw of the Nine-Tongued Wurm: (Strike) – Unleash the nine tongues of secreted god Mak Thuum Ngatha.

Zakaroth
2014-03-03, 06:35 PM
1st-Level

Alien Psych
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su, Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will partial

You can initiate this counter at any time contact is made with your mind through telepathy or a mind-effecting spell or ability (such as Charm or Compulsion). You may make a knowledge (the Planes) check instead of the corresponding save to resist the effects. A result of a natural 1 on your Knowledge (the Planes) check is not an automatic failure. If successful, your foe's mind peers into the Far Realm and the spell or ability does not affect you by any means. Instead the opponent must make a Will save or becomes shaken for 1 minute. If the opponent is 5 or more HD lower than you, he becomes frightened instead (shaken on save).
• Dormant Power: For each Aberrant feat you possess you gain a +1 madness bonus on Will saves against Charm and Compulsion spells.

Marrow Rend
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: None
Duration: 1 minute

As part of this maneuver, you make a single melee attack. Your attack deals an additional 2 points of Wisdom damage and inflicts a -1 penalty on attack rolls, saving throws, skill checks and ability checks.

Murmurs of Insane Truth
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: End of turn

Vast ominous whispers echo through your mind, warning you of impending danger and revealing the secrets of your foes. While in this stance, you gain a +1 madness bonus to initiative per four initiator levels (rounded up) and can act normally in a surprise round.
Secondly, whenever you make a knowledge check concerning an opponent’s combat abilities, you must always use a Knowledge (the Plains) check. When doing so, you receive a madness bonus to the check equal to half your initiator level plus your Charisma modifier. If the check is successful, you gain a +1 insight bonus on attacks made against that opponent, and +1 insight bonus on all saves to resist the abilities of that opponent. This benefit lasts for the remainder of the encounter and is lost if you leave this stance.
• At initiator level 10 or higher, the insight bonus increases to +2.

Vast Reach
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: End of turn

Your joints, bones and muscles twist and spasm, forming unnatural shapes that enhance both your reach and power. Until the end of turn, you gain a +2 bonus to Strength and your melee attacks have their range increased to 10 ft.
• Dormant Power: Whenever you initiate a strike or counter while Vast Reach is expended, you have a 10% chance per Aberrant feat you possess for Vast Reach to recover.


2nd-Level

Skein the Skin
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 2
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee
Target: One creature
Duration: 1 round per two initiator levels
Saving Throw: Fortitude partial

As part of this maneuver, you make a single melee attack. If successful, you deal an additional 2 points of Constitution damage and the victim spawns strange fleshed veins from his skin, binding him to the ground, effectively causing entanglement. Your foe can break free and move half its normal speed by using a full-round action to make a Strength check (DC 20 plus half the creatures HD). On a successful Fortitude save the veins wither away, preventing the entanglement and halving the Constitution damage.
• At initiator level 10, the Constitution damage increases to 4.

Weapons of Twisted Flesh
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 2
Initiation Action: 1 move action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 5 rounds

Channeling the abhorrent powers from beyond, you summon forth a twisted weapon grafted from your own flesh. You gain a random masterwork natural weapon which you are proficient with. You can graft a blade-like weapon (1d8 slashing, Weapon Focus), a morning star-like weapon (1d6 bludgeoning, 1.5 Strength to damage), a malicious claw (1d6 slashing, 18-20) or barbed tentacle (1d6 slashing, 10 ft reach). You may extend the initiation time of this maneuver to a full-round action, if you do, you may choose which weapon you graft.


Initiator LevelGraft Properties
1-4 Kaorti Resin weapon
5-8 +1 Kaorti Resin
9-12 +1 Kaorti Resin Corrosive
13-16 +2 Kaorti Resin Corrosive
17+ +3 Kaorti Resin Corrosive Burst
Kaorti Resin weapon information can be found page 110 from the Fiend Folio.


3rd-Level

Awakening
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 3
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 1 round per two initiator levels

One by one, strange bloodlit oculi begin to awaken all over your body. As each eye begins to move and twitch incoherently, it makes up for a truly unnerving sight. For the duration of this boost you gain all-round darkvision, can’t be flanked and benefit a +2 bonus to Spot checks.
• At initiator level 7, the bonus to Spot checks increases to +4 and the unsettling eyes’ gaze allows you to demoralize an opponent as a move action. When doing so, you may use a Knowledge (the Plains) check to demoralize an opponent as if using an intimidate check. This ability is considered a Gaze attack and thus can only be used against opponents that are observing you.
• At initiator level 13, the bonus to Spot checks increases to +8 and the eyes become strangely empowered, granting you enhanced sight, as if you were under the effect of True Seeing. Finally, when you successfully demoralize an opponent, it takes one point of Wisdom damage.
• Dormant Power: You gain darkvision up to 60 feet.

Tongues of the Great Wurm
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 3
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: 30 ft.
Target: One creature

Sharp jagged tendrils burst from your hand, impaling your opponent. You fire one tendril per three initiator levels (max 5), up to 30 ft. dealing 2d6 plus your Strength modifier piercing damage. Each is made as a natural ranged attack, using your highest attack modifier.

Xenomorphia
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 3
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Target: You
Duration: Stance

You embrace the raw mutagenic energies of the Far Realm, twisting your physiology into an aberrant form. While in this stance, you gain the Bestial Hide feat and gain 10% chance per Aberrant feat to ignore critical hits, precision damage and physical ability damage. If you already have the Bestial Hide feat, your aberrant feat count goes up by one instead. Furthermore, you gain a tentacle attack for every three Aberrant feats your possess, rounded up. As your power grows, so do the benefits you gain from Xenomorphia. Your tentacle damage increases and you gain additional bonuses as given in the table below.


Initiator LevelTentacle DamageAberrant Feat Count*Special
1-5
1d4
+0Bestial Hide, Fortification
6-10
1d6
+1Multiattack
11-15
1d6
+2+2 to Grapple checks
16+
1d8
+3Improved Multiattack
*: A numeric bonus towards your aberrant feat count, for the purpose of feats and abilities that scale with the number of Aberrant feats your possess.


4th-Level

Maddening Insight
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 4
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: End of turn

After a momentary blink into the vast realm of insanity, an eerie form of clarity engulfs you, strikes become truth. Until the end of turn, you gain an insight bonus equal to half your initiator level on attack rolls, and your attacks ignore any miss chance due to concealment. A natural 1 on these attacks is not an automatic miss.

Breach the Inertia
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 4
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Special
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous

In an instinctive reaction to a moment of peril you defy the laws of physics, bursting away in a seemingly impossible way. You can initiate this maneuver under two conditions:
• First; at any time you are attacked or affected by a spell or ability that allows a Reflex save. You may replace the corresponding AC or Reflex save with a Knowledge (the Plains) check. If successful, the attack, spell or ability misses and you instantly move up to 15 ft. into a direction of your choice. You are unaffected by any partial results of the Reflex save.
• Second; at any time during a charge you may initiate this maneuver to change the direction at any point while charging and extend its range by an amount equal to your movement speed.

Rage of Betrayed Flesh
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 4
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 full-round action
Range: 5 ft.
Target: One creature
Duration: 1 minute
Saving Throw: Will partial

With a burst of abhorrent energy, your flesh starts to unravel and tether. Muscles shift chaotically, as your shoulder and arm bulge, extending into a gruesome surreal form with immense power. As part of this maneuver you make a single melee attack, dealing an additional 1d6 points of damage per two initiator levels. In addition, creatures within a 10 ft radius of the target must make successful Will save or become shaken.


5th-Level

Conduit of Xoriat
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 5
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: 10 ft. emission
Duration: Stance

You become an embodied rift to the vast realm of madness, allowing its unnatural essence to seep in to the world around you. As you travel, a creeping nebula follows your steps and plants seem to bend away from your path, the ground around you reforms into an alien landscape, creating difficult terrain. You, however, are unaffected by this phenomena, allowing you to effectively ignore any form of difficult terrain. The affected ground that leaves the area of this stance reforms back to its original state. Furthermore, its corrupting nature causes affected beings to have their physical capabilities disrupted; suffering a -1 madness penalty to Attack rolls, AC, physical skill checks, and Fortitude and Reflex saves.
• At initiator 14, this penalty increases to -2.

Tendrils of Corruption
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 5
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee, up to 15 ft. reach.
Target: One creature

You spawn several harrowing tentacles and tendrils from your arm, attacking a foe up to 15 ft. away and binding him. After your attack roll is made, roll a D6 and use the table below to determine the type on constrictors your spawn.
The constrictors deal 3d6 plus your Strength modifier points of bludgeoning damage. If the attack is successful, you make a grapple attempt as an immediate action, without provoking an attack of opportunity. You may add one third your initiator level as a competence bonus to the grapple check. On a successful grapple, the constrictors deal 2d6 plus your Strength modifier bludgeoning damage each round, and last until dismissed at-will or the target breaks free. You may maintain the grapple as a standard action, but while doing so you can not move more than 15 ft. away from your target. If the initial attack misses, the tendrils will immediately retract, ending the maneuver.
• At initiator level 15, you may extend the initiation time of this maneuver to a full-round action, in order to choose which tentacles you spawn.


Result
Effect

1-2The Amoebic constrictors deal +3d6 points of acid damage on the initial hit, and additional acid damage each round equal to half your initiator level.

3-4The Gibbering Constrictors deal an additional point of Wisdom damage each round and instill a -1 madness penalty to all saving throws while grappling.

5-6The Leeching Constrictors deal an additional point of Constitution damage each round, while healing you for 1d6 hit points.


Xenomorphic Regeneration
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 5
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous; 5 rounds

You can initiate this maneuver at any time you receive an amount of damage that would lower you hit points below 25% of your maximum health. Until the end of turn all damage is reduced by amount equal to your initiator level, and you gain Fast Healing 5 for five rounds.
• Dormant Power: You gain Fast Healing 1.


6th-Level

Glimpse and Fracture
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su, Mind-affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 6
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Personal
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: Will partial

As you strike your foe, you evoke an omen so disruptive that with a single glance it burns the mind forever, and what the mind perceives it reflects upon the flesh.
As part of this maneuver, you make a single melee attack, dealing an additional point of Wisdom damage per three initiator levels and causes your victim to be dazed for 1 round by abhorrent visions. At the beginning of your next turn, your victim receives 1d8 points of damage for each point of Wisdom damage it has. A successful Will save halves the Wisdom damage and prevents the dazed effect.

Siphon Impulse
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 6
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous

You can initiate this maneuver at any time you are attacked in melee, but before any rolls are made. The attacker suffers a penalty to Strength equal to 1d4 plus 1 per three initiator levels, and all damage rolls are considered minimized. The attackers Strength cannot be lowered beyond 1. During your next turn, you gain a Strength bonus equal to the Strength penalty instilled on your attacker, and your melee attacks have their weapon damage maximized. This only affects up to a number of melee attacks equal to the number of attacks that were diminished by initiating this maneuver.


7th-Level

Agony Warp
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 7
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: Fortitude partial

As you strike your foe, raw unearthly energies of the Far Realm infect your foe’s flesh, disfiguring him horribly. You deal an additional 4 points of Strength, Dexterity and Constitution damage as organs, flesh and muscles moil and twist. The exposure of organs cause attacks made against the afflicted foe to have their threat range increased by 2. On a successful save, all damage done by this strike is halved and prevents the threat range increase. This strike only affects creatures primarily made from flesh.

Pinnacle of Crumbling Sanity
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su, Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 7
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: 120 ft. emission
Duration: Stance

You channel the endless insanity of the Far Realm into the minds of those around you, distracting them with strange sounds and manifestations. Enemies within the area have their Will saves lowered by 2, and take a -10 madness penalty to Concentration and Wisdom-based skill checks. However, this effect alerts those affected of a strange presence; a DC 25 knowledge (the Planes) check reveals its source as being related to the Far Realm.
Lastly, when you deal melee damage with your primary weapon, you deal an additional point of Wisdom damage. Whenever Wisdom damage dealt by you lowers a foes Wisdom score below 6, he must make a successful Will save or go Insane (permanently confused, until the Wisdom damage is recovered to 6 or higher).

Whispers from Beyond
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 7
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Opponent within 100 ft.
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will partial

You can initiate this maneuver at any time an opponent attempts to casts a spell within 100 feet of you. The caster must succeed a concentration check opposed by a Knowledge (the Planes) check. If the caster fails, the spell is considered countered and he must make a Will save or receive points of damage to the casters primary casting modifier equal to the spells level. If he does succeed, no stat damage is done and the spell continues as normal, except its effective caster level is halved.


8th-Level

Fang of the Uvuudaum
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su, Mind-affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 8
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: 15 feet melee
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: Wisdom partial

Your flesh wrings and twists, and a thick horrific spiked tendril spawns forward, striking at your foe. It deals 8d6 plus your Strength modifier piercing damage, plus an additional 1d6 Wisdom damage and causes the target to becomes confused for 5 rounds. A successful Will save halves the Wisdom damage and prevents the confusion.

Gyre of the Unraveller
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 8
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 full-round action
Range: 30 ft. radius centered on you
Duration: 5 rounds

With a horrific bellow, waves of unnatural energy pulse outward, dealing 5d6 points of sonic damage. The surrounding world begins to crumble and crack, while strange layers of alien geometry are woven into existence. The area temporarily reforms to difficult terrain and creatures with flight have their maneuverability impaired, reducing it by two steps. Breaking the planar rules within the area has a strange effect on other non-aberrant creatures, their saving throws are displaced; Fortitude saves become Will saves, Will saves become Reflex saves and Reflex saves become Fortitude saves.

Scorn Reality
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su, Teleportation]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 8
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 5 rounds

You corrupt, bend and twist the fabrics of time and space around you, reforming it to match the strange geometry found in the Far Realm. After you initiate this boost, your exact location becomes hard to predict causing you to benefit from a 50% miss chance, as if you had total concealment. However, unlike actual total concealment, Scorn Reality does not prevent enemies from targeting you normally. In addition, any distance you cross as part of your move action, while under the effects of Scorn Reality, may be made as if you teleport (as by the Dimension Door spell).
Finally, the gravity beneath your feet is bend to your will, allowing you to effectively walk and stand on any solid surface as though it was the normal ground. For example, this boost would allow you to teleport onto a ceiling or wall and stand on it as part of a move action (assuming it’s within your movement range).


9th-Level

Maw of the Nine-Tongued Wurm
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 9
Prerequisite: Five Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 full-round action
Range: 60 ft. cone
Target: Single or multiple creatures
Saving Throw: Fort or Will partial

With this strike you conjure the tongues of the secreted god Mak Thuum Ngatha. Nine huge fanged tentacles explode from your flesh, lashing out at your enemies. As part of this maneuver, you execute nine tentacle rakes and bites in 60 ft. cone, using your highest attack modifier, but with a -2 penalty, each dealing 2d6 points of damage. You may divide the attacks among targets within the cone, but you must declare to do so before any attack rolls are made. If three or more attacks hit a single target, roll a d8 to determine the tongues warping effect.


ResultEffectSave

1 Illness strikes the victim: Target becomes sickened for 1d20 hours.Fort

2 Your victim is brought into stupor: Losses the benefit from all combat and skill related Feats for one minute.Will

3The mouths spew forth an unnatural green-purple mist: A Mind Fog cloud is conjured at the victim’s location (CL 10). -

4 Terror swallows the victim: Target becomes frightened, or shaken on a successful save.Will

5 Your victim becomes infested: The target is instantly suffers from Faceless Hate without incubation time.Fort

6 Unfathomable images torment the mind: Instills confusion for one minute.Will

7 Amoebic mucus burns away skin: Deals 10 points of acid damage per successful attack and instills Acid Fever*.Fort

8 The victim is warped out of existence: Target is planeshifted to the Far Realm.Will
*: The Fort save prevents the Acid Fever (BoVD 30).

http://i62.tinypic.com/259v59j.jpg

Zakaroth
2014-03-03, 06:37 PM
Unspeakable Knowledge [Aberrant]
What has been seen cannot be unseen..
Prerequisite: Knowledge (the Plains) 4 ranks, one Sanity’s Eclipse stance.
Benefit: From now on you add your Charisma modifier to Will saves, and to Listen and Spot checks (in place of Wisdom). However, this horrid knowledge comes at cost of your humanity, your Wisdom is permanently reduced by 2, and you lose your Charisma bonus to social skills.

Evolved Beyond [Aberrant]
There are terrors lurking in the unseen corners of existence. Now come and gaze upon their fruition.
Prerequisite: Knowledge (the Planes) 9 ranks, Unspeakable Knowledge, three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers.
Benefit: The Evolved Beyond feat enables the use of three tactical options.
• Consume Madness: Whenever you successfully deal Wisdom damage, you restore 1 hit point per Aberrant feat your possess.
• Unreal Mind: While in a Sanity’s Eclipse stance, you become immune to Wisdom damage, drain, fear and confusion effects.
• Xenomorphic Reflex: To use this option, you must have at least one of the following maneuvers readied; Skein the Skin, Tendrils of Corruption or Tongues of the Great Wurm. You may initiate these maneuvers as an immediate action whenever you are attacked in melee, using your highest attack modifier at a -5 penalty. If so, the attacker suffers a -5 penalty on his attack rolls against you this turn. If you do, you are limited during your next turn; you can only make a move or standard action and cannot initiate strikes.

Visage of the Faceless [Aberrant]
Prerequisites: Knowledge (the Planes) 18 ranks, Alien Psych, Pinnacle of Crumbling Sanity stance, a minimal of four Aberrant feats; including Evolved Beyond.
Benefit: Your eyes and mouth seem to melt, slowly growing shut. While your nose and ears merge into your skin, giving you a truly unsettling appearance. You become blind, mute and unable to smell. However, you no longer require to breath or eat and gain several unique qualities:


Special Qualities:
• Your creature's type changes to outsider. Do not recalculate Hit Dice, base attack bonus, skill points or saves.
• You gain blindsight out to 60 feet.
• You gain telepathy out to 120 feet.
• You gain Immunity to mind-affecting abilities and abilities that attempt to read your mind (similar to Mind Blank).
• You gain a +1 madness bonus on intimidate checks, a -1 penalty on disguise checks, and sense motive checks made against you take a -2 penalty, per aberrant feat you possess.
• You must always adopt a Sanity’s Eclipse stance and have Alien Psych readied.
• You gain the ability to cast Detect Thoughts as a spell-like ability at-will with a caster level equal to your character level.

TheFamilarRaven
2014-03-05, 08:19 PM
Saw your Post on the PEACH exchange ... So here goes some PEACHing



Alien Psych
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su, Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will partial

You can initiate this counter at any time contact is made with your mind through telepathy or a mind-effecting spell or ability (such as Charm or Compulsion). You may make a knowledge (the Planes) check instead of the corresponding save to resist the effects. A result of a natural 1 on your Knowledge (the Planes) check is not an automatic failure. If successful, your foe mind peers into the Far Realm and the spell or ability does not affect you by any means. Instead the opponent must make a Will save or becomes shaken for 1 minute. If the opponent is 5 or more HD lower than you, he becomes frightened instead (shaken on save).
• Dormant Power: For each Aberrant feat you possess you gain a +1 madness bonus on Will saves against Charm and Compulsion spells.

Marrow Rend
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: None
Duration: 1 minute

As part of this maneuver, you make a single melee attack. Your attack deals an additional 2 points of Wisdom damage and inflicts a -1 penalty on attack rolls, saving throws, skill checks and ability checks.

Murmurs of Insane Truth
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: End of turn

Vast ominous whispers echo through your mind, warning you of impending danger and revealing the secrets of your foes. While in this stance, you gain a +1 madness bonus to initiative per four initiator levels (rounded up) and can act normally in a surprise round.
Secondly, whenever you make a knowledge check concerning an opponent’s combat abilities, you must always use a Knowledge (the Plains) check. When doing so, you receive a madness bonus to the check equal to half your initiator level plus your Charisma modifier. If the check is successful, you gain a +1 insight bonus on attacks made against that opponent, and +1 insight bonus on all saves to resist the abilities of that opponent. This benefit lasts for the remainder of the encounter and is lost if you leave this stance.
• At initiator level 10 or higher, the insight bonus increases to +2.

Vast Reach
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 1
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: End of turn

Your joints, bones and muscles twist and spasm, forming unnatural shapes that enhancing both your reach and power. Until the end of turn, you gain a +2 bonus to Strength and your melee attacks have their range increased to 10 ft.
• Dormant Power: Whenever you initiate a strike or counter while Vast Reach is expended, you have a 10% chance per Aberrant feat you possess for Vast Reach to recover.


One thing ... and this one is a nit-pick ... marrow rend from the name sounds like it does CON damage, cause marrow is in the bones ( or maybe STR or DEX damage), obviously mind rend is taken (I mean ... probably, I think it's a spell), But just saying. Also, How long does the -1 penalty on attacks, skills etc. last? It doesn't specify.


2nd-Level

Skein the Skin
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 2
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee
Target: One creature
Duration: 1 round per two initiator levels
Saving Throw: Fortitude partial

As part of this maneuver, you make a single melee attack. If successful, you deal an additional 2 points of Constitution damage and the victim spawns strange fleshed veins from his skin, binding him to the ground, effectively causing entanglement. Your foe can break free and move half its normal speed by using a full-round action to make a Strength check (DC 20 plus half the creatures HD). On a successful Fortitude save the veins wither away, preventing the entanglement and halving the Constitution damage.
• At initiator level 10, the Constitution damage increases to 4.

Weapons of Twisted Flesh
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 2
Initiation Action: 1 move action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 5 rounds

Channeling the abhorrent powers from beyond, you summon forth a twisted weapon grafted from your own flesh. You gain a random masterwork natural weapon which you are proficient with. You can graft a blade-like weapon (1d8; Weapon Focus), a morning star-like weapon (1d6, 1.5 Strength to damage), a malicious claw (1d6, 18-20) or barbed tentacle (1d6, 10 ft reach). You may extend the initiation time of this maneuver to a full-round action, if you do, you may choose which weapon you graft.

{table=head]Initiator Level|Graft Properties
1-4 |Kaorti Resin weapon|
5-8 |+1 Kaorti Resin|
9-12 |+1 Kaorti Resin Corrosive|
13-16 |+2 Kaorti Resin Corrosive|
17+ |+3 Kaorti Resin Corrosive Burst|[/table]
Kaorti Resin weapon information can be found page 110 from the Fiend Folio.


Make sure to list the damage type of the weapons for weapons of twisted flesh ... for instance, the blade-like should be (1d8 slashing; Weapon focus) and so forth.


3rd-Level

Awakening
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 3
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 1 round per two initiator levels

One by one, strange bloodlit oculi begin to awaken all over your flesh. As each eye begins to move and twitch incoherently, it makes up for a truly unnerving sight. For the duration of this boost you gain all-round darkvision, can’t be flanked and benefit a +2 bonus to Spot checks.
• At initiator level 7, the bonus to Spot checks increases to +4 and the unsettling eyes’ gaze allows you to demoralize an opponent as a move action. If so, you may use a Knowledge (the Plains) check to demoralize an opponent. This ability is considered a Gaze attack, and thus can only be used against opponents that are observing you.
• At initiator level 13, the bonus to spot checks increases to +8, and the eyes become strangely empowered, granting you enhanced sight, as if you were under the effect of True Seeing. Finally, when you successfully demoralize an opponent, it takes one point of Wisdom damage.
• Dormant Power: You gain darkvision up to 60 feet.

Tongues of the Great Wurm
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 3
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: 30 ft.
Target: One creature

Sharp jagged tendrils burst from your hand, impaling your opponent. You fire one tendril per three initiator levels (max 5), up to 30 ft. dealing 2d6 plus your Strength modifier piercing damage. Each is made as a natural ranged attack, using your highest attack modifier.

Xenomorphia
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 3
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Target: You
Duration: Stance

You embrace the raw mutagenic energies of the Far Realm, twisting your physiology into an aberrant form. While in this stance, you gain the Bestial Hide feat and gain 10% chance per Aberrant feat to ignore critical hits, precision damage and physical ability damage. If you already have the Bestial Hide feat, your aberrant feat count goes up by one instead. Furthermore, you gain a tentacle attack for every three Aberrant feats your possess, rounded up. As your power grows, so do the benefits you gain from Xenomorphia. Your tentacle damage increases and you gain additional bonuses as given in the table below.

{table=head]Initiator Level|Tentacle Damage|Aberrant Feat Count|Special
1-5 |
1d4|
+0|Bestial Hide, Fortification
6-10 |
1d6|
+1|Multiattack
11-15 |
1d6|
+2|+2 to Grapple checks
16+ |
1d8|
+3|Improved Multiattack
[/table]
*: A numeric bonus towards your aberrant feat count, for the purpose of feats and abilities that scale with the number of Aberrant feats your possess.


Awakening should include "...use knowledge (the Planes) to demoralize an opponent as if using an intimidate check" Is what I think you intended. Otherwise, give a DC to beat.


4th-Level

Maddening Insight
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 4
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: End of turn

After a momentary blink into the vast realm of insanity, an eerie form of clarity engulfs you, strikes become truth. Until the end of turn, you gain an insight bonus equal to half your initiator level on attack rolls, and your attacks ignore any miss chance due to concealment. A natural 1 on these attacks is not an automatic miss.

Breach the Inertia
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 4
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Special
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous

In an instinctive reaction to a moment of peril you defy the laws of physics, bursting away in a seemingly impossible way. You can initiate this maneuver under two conditions:
• First; at any time you are attacked or affected by a spell or ability that allows a Reflex save. You may replace the corresponding AC or Reflex save with a Knowledge (the Plains) check. If successful, the attack, spell or ability misses and you instantly move up to 15 ft. into a direction of your choice. You are unaffected by any partial results of the Reflex save.
• Second; at any time during a charge you may initiate this maneuver to change the direction at any point while charging and extend its range by an amount equal to your movement speed.

Rage of Betrayed Flesh
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 4
Prerequisite: One Sanity’s Eclipse maneuver
Initiation Action: 1 full-round action
Range: 5 ft.
Target: One creature
Duration: 1 minute
Saving Throw: Will partial

With a burst of abhorrent energy, your flesh starts to unravel and tether. Muscles shift chaotically, as your shoulder and arm bulge, extending into a gruesome surreal form with immense power. As part of this maneuver you make a single melee attack, dealing an additional 1d6 points of damage per two initiator levels. In addition, creatures within a 10 ft radius of the target must make successful Will save or become shaken.


Not much to say about these, as they are pretty solid by my reckoning.


5th-Level

Conduit of Xoriat
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 5
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: 10 ft. emission
Duration: Stance

You become an embodied rift to the vast realm of madness, allowing its unnatural essence to seep in to the world around you. As you travel, a creeping nebula follows your steps and plants seem to bend away from your path, the ground around you reforms into an alien landscape, creating difficult terrain. You, however, are unaffected by this phenomena, allowing you to effectively ignore any form of difficult terrain. The affected ground that leaves the area of this stance reforms back to its original state. Furthermore, its corrupting nature causes affected beings to have their physical capabilities disrupted; suffering a -1 madness penalty to Attack rolls, AC, physical skill checks, and Fortitude and Reflex saves.
• At initiator 14, this penalty increases to -2.

Tendrils of Corruption
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 5
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee, up to 15 feet reach.
Target: One creature

You spawn several harrowing tentacles and tendrils, attacking your foe and binding him. As part of this maneuver you randomly spawn Gibbering Constrictors or Rotting Constrictors. The tentacles deal 3d6 plus your Strength modifier points of damage. If the attack is successful, you make a grapple attempt as an immediate action, without provoking an attack of opportunity. You may add one third your initiator level as a competence bonus to this grapple check. On a successful grapple, the constrictors deal 2d6 plus your Strength modifier constriction damage each round, and last until released at will or the target breaks free. Based on the tentacles spawned, there is a secondary effect:
• The Gibbering Constrictors instills a -1 madness penalty to all saves throws while grappling.
• The Leeching Constrictors deals an additional point of Constitution damage each round, while healing you for 1d4 hit points.
You may extend the initiation time of this maneuver to a full round action, if you do, you may choose which tentacles you spawn.

Xenomorphic Regeneration
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 5
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous; 5 rounds

You can initiate this maneuver at any time you receive an amount of damage that would lower you hit points below 25% of your maximum health. Until the end of turn all damage is reduced by amount equal to your initiator level, and you gain Regeneration 5 for five rounds.
• Dormant Power: You gain Fast Healing 1.


Couple things, 1st, lets talk about Tendrils of Corruption ... clarify the method the tentacles are randomly chosen (i.e, roll a d6, Odd numbers are X, even numbers are Y) and say many spawn, as you use the plural of Constrictor. Also, the different abilities of the tentacles don't match with names of the tentacles, for instance. It says you spawn "Rotting" Constrictors, but the ability describes them as 'leeching"

next, Xenomorphic Regeneration

Regeneration means that all damage you take will be treated as non-lethal and you'll recover X amount of non-lethal damage per round. If you knew this, that's great. Just wanted to clarify that was your intention. But also, you need a method to overcome the regeneration, since that's generally how regeneration works.



6th-Level

Glimpse and Fracture
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su, Mind-affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 6
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Personal
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: Will partial

You evoke an omen so disruptive that with a single glance it burns the mind forever and what the mind perceives it reflects upon the flesh.
As part of this maneuver, you make a single melee attack, dealing an additional point of Wisdom damage per three initiator levels and causes your victim to be dazed for 1 round by abhorrent visions. At the beginning of your next turn, your victim receives 1d8 points of damage for each point of Wisdom damage it has. A successful Will save halves the Wisdom damage and prevents the dazed effect.

Siphon Impulse
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 6
Prerequisite: Two Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous

You can initiate this maneuver at any time you are attacked in melee, but before any rolls are made. The attacker suffers a penalty to Strength equal to 1d4 plus 1 per three initiator levels, and all damage rolls are considered minimized. The attackers Strength cannot be lowered beyond 1. During your next turn, you gain an equal bonus to your Strength score, and your melee attacks have their weapon damage maximized. This only affects up to a number of melee attacks equal to the number of attacks that were diminished by initiating this maneuver.


in regards to Siphon Impulse, for clarity, maybe write it like, "...you gain a strength bonus equal to the strength damage you dealt to your attacker for ..."


7th-Level

Agony Warp
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 7
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: Melee
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: Fortitude partial

As you strike your foe, raw unearthly energies of the Far Realm infect your foe’s flesh, disfiguring him horribly. You deal an additional 4 points of Strength, Dexterity and Constitution damage as organs, flesh and muscles moil and twist. The exposure of organs cause attacks made against them to have their threat range increased by 2. On a successful save, all damage done by this strike is halved and prevents the threat range increase. This strike only affects creatures primarily made from flesh.

Pinnacle of Crumbling Sanity
Sanity’s Eclipse (Stance) [Su, Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 7
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: 120 ft. emission
Duration: Stance

You channel the endless insanity of the Far Realm into the minds of those around you, distracting them with strange sounds and manifestations. Enemies within the area have their Will saves lowered by 2, and take a -10 madness penalty to Concentration and Wisdom-based skill checks. However, this effect alerts those affected of a strange presence; a DC 25 knowledge (the Planes) check reveals its source as being related to the Far Realm.
Lastly, when you deal melee damage with your primary weapon, you deal an additional point of Wisdom damage. Whenever Wisdom damage dealt by you lowers a foes Wisdom score below 6, he must make a successful Will save or go Insane (permanently confused, until the Wisdom damage is recovered to 6 or higher).

Whispers from Beyond
Sanity’s Eclipse (Counter) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 7
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 immediate action
Range: Opponent within 100 ft.
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: Will partial

You can initiate this maneuver at any time an opponent attempts to casts a spell within a 60 feet of you. The caster must succeed a concentration check opposed by a Knowledge (the Planes) check. If the caster fails, the spell is considered countered and he must make a Will save or receive points of damage to the casters primary casting modifier equal to the spells level. If he does succeed, no stat damage is done and his CL is considered halved instead.


Whispers from Beyond is missing what "stat" is damage whe nthen spell is countered. also, for clarity, "....On a successful save, the caster takes no WIS damage, and the spell continues as normal, except its effective caster level is halved.


8th-Level

Fang of the Uvuudaum
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su, Mind-affecting]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 8
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 standard action
Range: 15 feet melee
Target: One creature
Saving Throw: Wisdom partial

Your flesh wrings and twist, before a thick horrific spiked tendril spawns forward, striking at your foe, dealing 8d6 plus your Strength modifier piercing damage, plus an additional 1d6 Wisdom damage and causes the target to becomes confused for 5 rounds. A successful Wisdom save halves the Wisdom damage and prevents confusion.

Gyre of the Unraveller
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 8
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 full-round action
Range: 30 ft. radius centered on you
Saving Throw: Will partial
Duration: 5 rounds

With a horrific bellow, waves of unnatural energy pulse outward, dealing 5d6 points of sonic damage. The surrounding world begins to crumble and crack, while strange layers of alien geometry are woven into existence. The area temporarily reforms to difficult terrain and creatures with flight have their maneuverability impaired, reducing it by two steps. Breaking the planar rules within the area has a strange effect on other non-aberrant creatures, their saves throws are displaced; Fortitude saves become Will saves, Will saves become Reflex saves and Reflex saves become Fortitude saves.

Scorn Reality
Sanity’s Eclipse (Boost) [Su, Teleportation]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 8
Prerequisite: Three Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 5 rounds

You corrupt, bend and twist the fabrics of time and space around you, reforming it to match the strange geometry found in the Far Realm. After you initiate this boost, your exact location becomes hard to predict causing you to benefit from a 50% miss chance, as if you had total concealment. However, unlike actual total concealment, Scorn Reality does not prevent enemies from targeting you normally. In addition, any distance you cross as part of your move action, while under the effects of Scorn Reality, may be made as if you teleport (as by the Dimension Door spell).
Finally, the gravity beneath your feet is bend to your will, allowing you to effectively walk and stand on any solid surface as though it was the normal ground. For example, this boost would allow you to teleport onto a ceiling or wall and stand on it as part of a move action (assuming it’s within your movement range).


These seem alright ... just re-write for grammar.


9th-Level

Maw of the Nine-Tongued Wurm
Sanity’s Eclipse (Strike) [Su]
Level: Sanity’s Eclipse 9
Prerequisite: Five Sanity’s Eclipse maneuvers
Initiation Action: 1 full-round action
Range: 60 ft. cone
Target: Single or multiple creatures
Saving Throw: Fort or Will partial

With this strike you conjure the tongues of the secreted god Mak Thuum Ngatha. Nine huge fanged tentacles explode from your flesh, lashing out at your enemies. As part of this maneuver, you execute nine tentacle rakes and bites in 60 ft. cone, using your highest attack modifier, but with a -2 penalty, each dealing 2d6 points of damage. You may divide the attacks among targets within the cone, but you must declare to do so before any of the attack rolls are made. If three or more attacks hit a single target, roll a d8 to determine the tongues warping effect.

{table=head]Result|Effect|Save

1 |Illness strikes the victim: Target becomes sickened for 1d20 hours.|Fort

2 |Your victim is brought into stupor: Losses the benefit from all combat and skill related Feats for one minute.|Will

3|The mouths spew forth an unnatural green-purple mist: A Mind Fog cloud is conjured at the victim’s location (CL 10).| -

4 |Terror swallows the victim: Target becomes frightened, or shaken on a successful save.|Will

5 |Your victim becomes corrupted: The target is instantly suffers from Faceless Hate without incubation time.|Fort

6 |Unfathomable images torment the mind: Instills confusion for one minute.|Will

7 |Amoebic mucus burns away skin: Deals 10 points of acid damage per successful attack and instills Acid Fever*.|Fort

8 |The victim is warped out of existance: Target is planeshifted to the Far Realm.|Will
[/table]

http://i62.tinypic.com/259v59j.jpg

epic :smallbiggrin: ... might want to include what that "*" means on the table for this ability ... under the acid mucas this.

Overall, I really want to use this discipline ... I actually have some ideas on how to implement it in my current campaign! Now ... If you could me a solid and take a gander at my Centurion (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=335088) I'd be much obliged

Zakaroth
2014-03-07, 01:24 PM
One thing ... and this one is a nit-pick ... marrow rend from the name sounds like it does CON damage, cause marrow is in the bones ( or maybe STR or DEX damage), obviously mind rend is taken (I mean ... probably, I think it's a spell), But just saying. Also, How long does the -1 penalty on attacks, skills etc. last? It doesn't specify.

I wrote some fluff once, releasing disturbing rippels that can be felt through the bone. But some how it didn't end up here. The duration is one 1 minute though, its there in the list.


Make sure to list the damage type of the weapons for weapons of twisted flesh ... for instance, the blade-like should be (1d8 slashing; Weapon focus) and so forth.

Awakening should include "...use knowledge (the Planes) to demoralize an opponent as if using an intimidate check" Is what I think you intended. Otherwise, give a DC to beat.
Good points, will fix.


Couple things, 1st, lets talk about Tendrils of Corruption ... clarify the method the tentacles are randomly chosen (i.e, roll a d6, Odd numbers are X, even numbers are Y) and say many spawn, as you use the plural of Constrictor. Also, the different abilities of the tentacles don't match with names of the tentacles, for instance. It says you spawn "Rotting" Constrictors, but the ability describes them as 'leeching"
Fair enough, I will clarify the random thing and will fix the naming inconsistencies. Not sure if I'm following on the grammar part. English is not my native language, as you might have noticed. The fluff is so that several tendrils/tentacles spawn, but as part of a single attack (it could just as well be considered a single tentacle attack). I think I will tinker with this maneuver a bit more.


Regeneration means that all damage you take will be treated as non-lethal and you'll recover X amount of non-lethal damage per round. If you knew this, that's great. Just wanted to clarify that was your intention. But also, you need a method to overcome the regeneration, since that's generally how regeneration works.
Yes, it was, but I was not really convinced yet about which it should be. I switched a couple of times between regen. and fast healing. Don't know what overcome "source" would fit either. Maybe I should just change it back to Fast Healing and thereby simplify it a bit more.


in regards to Siphon Impulse, for clarity, maybe write it like, "...you gain a strength bonus equal to the strength damage you dealt to your attacker for ..."

Good one, will do.


Whispers from Beyond is missing what "stat" is damage when the spell is countered. also, for clarity, "....On a successful save, the caster takes no WIS damage, and the spell continues as normal, except its effective caster level is halved.
It deals damage to the caster primary casting modifier, so if you cast with Int, you take Int damage.


These seem alright ... just re-write for grammar. Hmmm, is it that bad? Could you maybe direct me to what needs re-writing? I will take another careful look myself though.


epic :smallbiggrin: ... might want to include what that "*" means on the table for this ability ... under the acid mucas this.Good catch, will add the additional info.


Overall, I really want to use this discipline ... I actually have some ideas on how to implement it in my current campaign! Now ... If you could me a solid and take a gander at my Centurion (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=335088) I'd be much obliged[/QUOTE] Cool and thanks. If you do and find any balance (or other) issues, please let me know. I will certainly do!

TheFamilarRaven
2014-03-09, 01:12 AM
Hmmm, is it that bad? Could you maybe direct me to what needs re-writing? I will take another careful look myself though.


it's nothing too major ... Just minor stuff ... for instance ... Gyre of the Unraveller says "... non-aberrant creature have their saves throws ..." when it should be "saving throws" ... and in Scorn Reality "... gravity is bend ... when it should be "is bent"

But I wouldn't worry too much about the grammar ... English is my native language and I still manage to butcher it on the internet :smalltongue:

On another note, I feel Tendrilis of Corruption could use a little more clarification. Maybe think of re-wording it like this, or hamming it up as much as you want. My confusion comes (and this is just my interpretation of the way it's written now), that the tendrils spawn from the initiator's body, and the nattack an opponent up to 15 ft away. The tendrils last until the dismissed, or the opponent breaks free of the grapple. But since the tentacles spawn from from the initiator, do they have to maintain the grapple as part of their turn as normal? or are they free to act regularly?

It's confusing because the ability (at least to me) seems to imply that the tentacles have free will, but they are spawned as part of the initiator ... not sure if this was the intent, but I have a re-write suggestion ...

" When you execute this maneuver, you spawn several harrowing tentacles and tendrils that can attack foes up to 15 ft away. If your attack is successful, you deal 3d6 plus STR mod bludgeoning damage, and you may make a grapple check as an immediate action. You gain a bonus to the grapple roll equal to 1/3 your initiator level. Each round that target is grappled, they take 2d6 plus STR modifier bludgeoning damage. You may maintain the grapple as a standard action, but you can not move more than 15 ft away from your target. The tendrils last until the target escapes the grapple, or you dismiss them.

Additionally, the Tendrils have other abilities, that vary depending on the tendril that spawns. they can either be gibbering tendrils or rotting tendrils. To determine which type spawns, roll one die. If you roll on odd number, than gibbering tendrils spawn, otherwise, rotting tendrils spawn ... "

You can continue from there ... I know my version is a little long, that's just the way I write things ...

Anyway, thanks for looking over my Centurion, i think i'll do some modifications soon.

Zakaroth
2014-03-09, 11:31 AM
It is strange how, after some point, you just can't really proof read your own material, I always seem to miss all kinds of obvious mistakes.

Thanks for taking the time to clarify, I see what you mean now. Based on your feedback, I have rewritten most of the skill and added a new type of spawn-able tentacle.

No problem, if you do modify, feel free to let me know and I'll do another look-over.

If anyone else has any feedback, it would be much appreciated, even if its just some small nit-picky thing or unclarity.

ZamielVanWeber
2014-03-12, 08:47 PM
[SIZE="4"]Visage of the Faceless [Aberrant]
Prerequisites: Knowledge (the Planes) 18 ranks, Alien Psych, Pinnacle of Crumbling Sanity stance, a minimal of four Aberrant feats; including Evolved Beyond.
Benefit: Your eyes and mouth seem to melt, slowly growing shut. While your nose and ears merge into your skin, giving you a truly unsettling appearance. You become blind, mute and unable to smell. However, you no longer require to breath or eat and gain several unique qualities:


Special Qualities:
• Your creature's type changes to outsider. Do not recalculate Hit Dice, base attack bonus, skill points or saves. You gain the appropriate augmented subtype.
• You gain blindsight out to 60 feet, as well as telepathy out to 120 feet.
• You gain immunity to mind-affecting abilities and abilities that attempt to read your mind (similar to Mind Blank).
• You gain a +1 madness bonus on intimidate checks, a -1 penalty on disguise checks, and sense motive checks made against you receive a -2 penalty per aberrant feat you possess.
• You must always adopt a Sanity’s Eclipse stance and havethe Alien Psych manuver readied.
• You may use Detect Thoughts at will as a spell like ability with a caster level equal to your character level.


I made some changes to this feat's wording in blue. See if you like them better (it seems more standardized to me). You also forgot a caster level for Detect Thoughts.

On Maw on the Nine-Tongued Worm:
I would recommend changing the wording to this:
With this strike you conjure the tongues of the secret god Mak Thuum Ngatha. Nine huge fanged tentacles explode from your flesh, lashing out at your enemies. As part of this maneuver, you may execute up to nine tentacle rakes 60 ft. cone, each using your highest attack modifier with a -2 penalty, each dealing 2d6 points of bludgeoning, slashing, and piercing damage. You may divide the attacks among targets within the cone, but you must declare the target of each attack before any attack rolls are made. If three or more attacks hit a single target, roll a d8 to determine the tongues' warping effect.

I would also recommend to make some changes to the tongues' warping effects:

1: 2d10 instead of 1d20.
2: Just make it all feats, otherwise you can create the "what is a combat related feat" issue as well as risk punishing mundanes but leaving casters be. Add a line that any spell prepared with a metamagic feat that the caster no longer has access to cannot be cast until they regain usage of that feat.
3: CL 15 (Because SR)
7: The target takes an additional 10 points of Acid Damage for each tentacle rake that struck them as part of this maneuver.


You have some great stuff here. I will be back to drive you bonkers at some point :smalltongue:

Zakaroth
2014-03-16, 06:20 AM
A bit of a late response, but I was very busy this week. You got some good points, I'll take look and do some adjusting/improving. If you find the time, please feel to drive me bonkers, I would appreciate it :smallsmile: