What would you do if you met an extraterrestrial?

[PallElendro]

One of these days, a human, no matter how impoverished or wealthy, socially recognised or faceless, will meet up with a life-form from beyond our planet. Might be a minute after you read this post, months, years, decades. But you all must have a plan to interact with them if you see them, right?
If you were to meet an extraterrestrial life-form, what would you do with them? The circumstances are that they are totally friendly, open to interspecies interactions, and vaguely humanoid.

[Starwulf]

One of these days, a human, no matter how impoverished or wealthy, socially recognised or faceless, will meet up with a life-form from beyond our planet. Might be a minute after you read this post, months, years, decades. But you all must have a plan to interact with them if you see them, right?
If you were to meet an extraterrestrial life-form, what would you do with them? The circumstances are that they are totally friendly, open to interspecies interactions, and vaguely humanoid.

Don't particularly believe we'll ever see another intelligent life form, sorry. Not saying there aren't any out there, but the sheer odds against seeing them until we have highly advanced interstellar space travel, are slim to none, and slim done left town.

That saying, if I did see one, I'd run for the hills, screaming like a banshee.

[Flickerdart]

Is it alone? The likelihood of mutual understanding reached within any reasonable time frame is impossibly low, so I'd wait until it inevitably got itself killed by something stupid like the common cold, grab an armful of its tech, and book it to Mountainview.

[Admiral Squish]

I suspect it would depend highly on exact context of the meeting. If I was just out somewhere and ran into a semi-humanoid alien lifeform, as long as it made no hostile or terrifying actions, there would be initial trepidation, then curiosity, then trying to figure out who I could call about such a thing. I mean, who do you call, anyways? I mean, who's gonna believe a random guy claiming to have found an alien? Probably not some low-level guy on the 911 answering service. Oh, and I'd take photos, if I can figure out a way to do it without terrifyin' him.

[Lord Raziere]

I'd made the vulcan hand sign then say "I welcome you in peace, space stranger, you would like to buy my bizarre goods from this planet yes?" in a intentionally fake and funny accent. just to screw with their head.

[Bulldog Psion]

I would depart the area with as much rapidity as a quiet withdrawal would allow. Running and screaming draws far too much attention to you and activates the aggressive response, more than likely, in your average run of the mill apex-predator-turned-sapient. Just fading out, in so far as it's possible, is probably the best option.

Of course, part of what I did would probably depend on the alien's choices, too. For example, if they were hard-noses and had orders not to be seen by the natives, my next action would likely be to lie on the ground rapidly dying from a hole burned through my heart or brain. This, of course, is a major part of the reason why I would attempt to quietly depart the area as fast as possible.

[Gravitron5000]

Offer it some Reese's Pieces. I don't think that I'd let it use my phone though. The long distance charges would be horrendous.

[FLHerne]

More likely to be an extraterrestrial rover/sample probe, if they go about exploration anything like we do.

If an actual live alien came to look at stuff, they'd presumably have some sort of environmental protection (i.e. no common-cold problem) and be prepared to encounter the local wildlife. :smallwink:

Maybe try to avoid any involuntary tissue-sampling/dissection? Although they'd probably want to observe normal behaviour first.

[Admiral Squish]

Observe normal behavior... Okay, here's a scenario for you. You encounter a semi-humanoid alien. You have no common language, but it does nothing threatening toward you. Said alien proceeds to follow you around and stare at you. For days. No communication, it just follows you around. It ignores or barely notes the behavior and reactions of other humans. If attacked it responds with non-lethal but highly effective force. It's got transportation that allows it to keep up with you no matter where or how you travel and if you manage to 'lose' it, it always finds you again within an hour. How would you respond to such a thing?

[Kneenibble]

I would hope he look a little something like this:
http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20081015083457/aliens/images/8/80/VUX.gif

[golentan]

"Hello fellow traveller. I've been trapped on this world with the locals, who call themselves humans, for the past 8000 or so rotations around its primary star. In that time, I've seen nearly everything these people are capable of. My advice to you: Run. There is nothing of value here that can't be found elsewhere, and if you continue into town there's a fifty fifty chance that one of them will assume you're hostile and shoot you regardless of your intent. They are improving, so feel free to come back in a couple hundred years, but really, right now you're better off marking this place as uninhabited and sailing on."

[Flickerdart]

I would hope he look a little something like this:
http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20081015083457/aliens/images/8/80/VUX.gif
Really? I would hope that he doesn't.

[Asta Kask]

I'd summon up my inner Captain Kirk and ask if it wants to have sex with me.

[noparlpf]

One of these days, a human, no matter how impoverished or wealthy, socially recognised or faceless, will meet up with a life-form from beyond our planet. Might be a minute after you read this post, months, years, decades. But you all must have a plan to interact with them if you see them, right?
If you were to meet an extraterrestrial life-form, what would you do with them? The circumstances are that they are totally friendly, open to interspecies interactions, and vaguely humanoid.

"Ooh. Did you bring a biology textbook with you? No? Sorry, nothing personal." And then I dissect them.

[Grinner]

Observe normal behavior... Okay, here's a scenario for you. You encounter a semi-humanoid alien. You have no common language, but it does nothing threatening toward you. Said alien proceeds to follow you around and stare at you. For days. No communication, it just follows you around. It ignores or barely notes the behavior and reactions of other humans. If attacked it responds with non-lethal but highly effective force. It's got transportation that allows it to keep up with you no matter where or how you travel and if you manage to 'lose' it, it always finds you again within an hour. How would you respond to such a thing?

Well, my first instinct would be to call the police. 'Cause, y'know, a creepy person-thing-organism is watching me as I sleep.

When the police prove ineffective, the National Guard, the Army, or Batman will probably be called in. They'll probably then quarantine my home and assail me with questions. Assuming they still can't capture and/or dissect the alien, they might consider dissecting me instead.

[TheThan]

I’d punch it in the face (knocking it out of course) say “Welcome to Earth” then proceed to smoke a cigar.

All this after I’ve forced it down with my F 18.

edit:
unless of course it's a hot alien space babe... then I'm going the Kirk route.

[GoblinArchmage]

I'd summon up my inner Captain Kirk and ask if it wants to have sex with me.

This is the only appropriate answer, regardless of what the alien looks like. Shame on all of you for not suggesting it earlier.

[huttj509]

"How was the trip?"

[Vizzerdrix]

I'd grab my laptop and introduce them/it to 4chan.

[Killer Angel]

If you were to meet an extraterrestrial life-form, what would you do with them? The circumstances are that they are totally friendly, open to interspecies interactions, and vaguely humanoid.

I'm planning to make good use of my towel.

[Frozen_Feet]

That would highly depend on what kind of an extra-terrestrial it is, something none of you have told me. :smalltongue:

[Slipperychicken]

[Assuming I encounter a "little green man" alien during my normal routine, and assuming no interruptions from the alien]

I'd probably spend between 1 and 15 minutes wondering if it was a fake and/or some kind of prank. I'd then attempt to steel my face for the hidden cameras which might be deployed nearby to capture my reaction, and try to ask something like "what, is this some kind of prank?", hoping that a human would come out and confirm my suspicion. If there's no response, then I might take a photo of the alien and walk away. After walking out, I'd wonder who to call about it.

If the alien started speaking to me in recognizable English, I'd feel completely sure that it's a prank, and I'd probably ask it some snarky questions before walking out.

[The Extinguisher]

Explode my social media.
I wonder how many followers an alien picture would get me?

[Kajhera]

Well, attempt to communicate with. Talk to a fair amount, endeavor to behave in a manner suggesting friendliness as appropriate for surrounding culture, try to start working out some pidgin. Be the primate being taught sign language.

Treat the whole situation with curiosity and calmness. Yes, it's very exciting, but don't want to scare anyone off (human or alien). Communicate with other humans in a way that will set them at ease. Basically, don't make any sudden moves, or provoke any fellow humans into making sudden moves. Strive to keep alien safe, and try to teach them a healthy caution/fear of humans, without fearing me, and without discouraging friendly interaction (basically same reasoning as, don't just jump into a strange wolf pack with friendly intentions, however neat of folk the wolves are).

[AtomicKitKat]

Depending on relative tech levels, figure out some way to come out on top, or keep myself just ahead of it.

Is it bad that my first thought upon seeing the thread title was "The Captain Kirk interspecies communication act"? And I've never even watched a single episode of Star Trek.

[Slipperychicken]

Depending on relative tech levels, figure out some way to come out on top, or keep myself just ahead of it.

Is it bad that my first thought upon seeing the thread title was "The Captain Kirk interspecies communication act"? And I've never even watched a single episode of Star Trek.

No, but it is bad that you've never seen an episode of Star Trek.

[Ravens_cry]

No, but it is bad that you've never seen an episode of Star Trek.

It's a downright tragedy.
On topic, I'd say "Hello and welcome. I am sure you have a cultural legacy that are alien to us, and us likewise to you. I am sure we can find a way to share that. Perhaps, say, Agatha Christie's complete works for plans to whatever you used to get here."

[Kindablue]

Traditional Earth greeting. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kl-Y8ZkUenk)

[Flickerdart]

I'd grab my laptop and introduce them/it to 4chan.
Without cultural context, even the darkest corners of 4chan are meaningless. The alien would be utterly immune to the worst shock images.

[tomandtish]

I'd grab my laptop and introduce them/it to 4chan.

So if they weren't planning on exterminating us before, you want to make sure it does happen? :smallbiggrin:

Given OP's parameters'

1) Try and establish enough initial communication so they decide to use me for all further negotiations with earth.

2) Become the default first ambassador of humanity.

3) ....

4) Profit

[PallElendro]

Explode my social media.
I wonder how many followers an alien picture would get me?

That's what I was thinking. Taking a selfie with an alien #FirstContact

[Slipperychicken]

Here are a few I didn't think of before. All of these assume I was the first person to contact the alien.

Write books and articles relating to the experience, sell them for lots of money.
Run the talk show circuit, hawking my new book(s).
Run the lecture circuit (i.e. get people to pay me to talk about aliens).
Acquire movie/TV/game rights.
Copyright the alien's image if possible.
Sell alien-themed swag (t-shirts, mugs, posters, etc), some with an image of me somehow interacting with the alien.
Maybe write music inspired by the first contact, sell it.
Auction off some of my stuff ("these are the glasses through which the first alien was seen by man!", "this phone took the first photograph of [alien species]!") that I had with me while I encountered the alien.
If someone wants to run tests on me (to determine effects of alien contact), they'll have to cough up some serious dough.
Roll in money.
Do all of the above, with the alien's help if possible.
Roll in more money.

[Grinner]

If I may offer a critique:


Write books and articles relating to the experience, sell them for lots of money. Yes.
Run the talk show circuit, hawking my new book(s). Yes.
Run the lecture circuit (i.e. get people to pay me to talk about aliens). Yes.
Acquire movie/TV/game rights. For the book? Yes. Otherwise, I'd give you a resounding "What?".
Copyright the alien's image if possible. I don't see how you could.
Sell alien-themed swag (t-shirts, mugs, posters, etc), some with an image of me somehow interacting with the alien. Perhaps the aforementioned selfie?
Maybe write music inspired by the first contact, sell it. Are you any good at writing music?
Auction off some of my stuff ("these are the glasses through which the first alien was seen by man!", "this phone took the first photograph of [alien species]!") that I had with me while I encountered the alien. Yes.
If someone wants to run tests on me (to determine effects of alien contact), they'll have to cough up some serious dough. Yes, assuming you haven't already been forcibly quarantined.
Roll in money. Yes.
Do all of the above, with the alien's help if possible. Perhaps.
Roll in more money. Yes.

[Solse]

Knowing my cowardly self, I would probably run away.

[Bulldog Psion]

Thinking about it more, I'd probably head for the nearest hospital to check myself in for a CAT scan and sundry other tests. "Weird, highly realistic hallucinations -- help!" :smallbiggrin:

I would definitely figure it was in my head if the "alien follows you around silently observing no matter what you do" scenario outlined above were the case.

[lolthfollower]

I would treat it like an ordinary human. If it abducted me like a cheesy sci-fi storybut were friendly I would either a) If they annoy me, beat them up or b) Just pretend nothing happened because honestly,(no offence intended) most people who would believe me wold be kind of weird. Probably.

[Lord Raziere]

I wonder what would happen if the alien landed in say, the Philippines or somewhere like that instead of America, y'know somewhere that is completely third world country, no electricity, little knowledge of outside world, and it just gets totally the wrong picture about humanity, and thus invades over getting inaccurate information. that would actually be an understandable way for an alien invasion to come about to my mind, because remember how in our movies we tend to automatically assume the first alien contact we see tells us how meeting the rest of the species will play out? imagine that but in reverse....

because all of this is assuming the alien lands in like, the First World and encounters someone who is relatively well off. imagine if it finds a Third Worlder instead who is in dire straits for some reason....

[Solse]

I wonder what would happen if the alien landed in say, the Philippines or somewhere like that instead of America, y'know somewhere that is completely third world country, no electricity, little knowledge of outside world, and it just gets totally the wrong picture about humanity, and thus invades over getting inaccurate information. that would actually be an understandable way for an alien invasion to come about to my mind, because remember how in our movies we tend to automatically assume the first alien contact we see tells us how meeting the rest of the species will play out? imagine that but in reverse....

because all of this is assuming the alien lands in like, the First World and encounters someone who is relatively well off. imagine if it finds a Third Worlder instead who is in dire straits for some reason....

I somewhat doubt that good, friendly aliens would invade because their impression of humanity is poor, but I see your point. If the aliens land in a crime-ridden area, the might think that all humans are terrible monsters who need to be killed. Granted, if the aliens are malicious, they might want to invade due to thinking that humanity has little to no chance of fighting back.

[Fragenstein]

I'd help defeat some invading monstrosity and then fly off with him and his funny blue police box.

[smuchmuch]

Probably die.
Sure they may not be hostile but there's about as many reasons for them to be than not
Or maybe I'd escape by taking the shortcut i was loking for on this lonely country road.

Unless of course the alien was but a few mm tall, I'd probably accidently step on it or swallow it in a yawn along wit all the incredibly advanced knowlege it was going to share with us. Drat.

[OverdrivePrime]

I'd be really excited, walk up and say hello, and probably contract some weird disease like Space Madness.

[Karoht]

One of these days, a human, no matter how impoverished or wealthy, socially recognised or faceless, will meet up with a life-form from beyond our planet. Might be a minute after you read this post, months, years, decades. But you all must have a plan to interact with them if you see them, right?
If you were to meet an extraterrestrial life-form, what would you do with them? The circumstances are that they are totally friendly, open to interspecies interactions, and vaguely humanoid.
Option 1
"Hello. I'm the Doctor. Did you just get in? There's a terrific pub just over there if you're hungry and I could do with a snack and maybe a pint, and they've got a lovely little shop right next to it. Excellent place to be discussing Article 15 of the Shadow Proclamation, or perhaps catch the football match. Care for a Jammie Dodger?"
Fez and bowtie optional.

Option 2
"Doctor! Thank goodness you made it! No time to explain, lets get the heck out of here!"

Option 3
"Bah-weep-graaaaagnah wheep nini bong." Meanwhile, on my phone I queue up the quote of Optimus Prime saying "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" in case the creature spouts something about subjugating the planet.

Option 4
"Welcome to Earth. Are you in need of any assistance? How may we help?"

[Jaycemonde]

Mix it a couple of drinks, talk for hours about videogame crap and then probably end up having tentacle frickity-frack.

[Gnoman]

Me? I'd probably blast it out of the cornfield and jack the spaceship.

[rlc]

I'd probably ignore it, maybe smirk and keep walking, thinking it was someone in a costume. If it followed me, out probably sour, "STRANGER DANGER!" If it kept following me, I'd probably start telling it really bad jokes. Maybe try to probe it first. Giggedy.

As for the invasion strategy, they'd most likely attack a poor area first anyway, just to gain a base of operations. That is, unless they can just outright destroy us, which would actually be pretty difficult without weapons of mass destruction, and I'm assuming they'd want keep the planet in a usable state.

[Eaglejarl]

I somewhat doubt that good, friendly aliens would invade because their impression of humanity is poor, but I see your point. If the aliens land in a crime-ridden area, the might think that all humans are terrible monsters who need to be killed. Granted, if the aliens are malicious, they might want to invade due to thinking that humanity has little to no chance of fighting back.

I can't really think of a single sensible reason aliens would want to invade us.


We want your land! Seriously? Dude, there's like, a GAZILLION uninhabited planets between your world and ours. Why spend the money / energy exterminating us when you could just grab one of them?
We want your gold / water / other stuff! Seriously? Dude, there's more gold / water / other stuff in the asteroids and comets than in all of the inner-system worlds put together. Plus, they're easier to mine and export when there's no stupid gravity well in the way.
We want to eat you! Seriously? Dude, we are so far out on the "inefficient calories" scale it's not funny. Clone some of your space-cows or grow some of your space-wheat. Plus, we almost certainly don't match your biology so you won't get any nutrients from eating us anyway -- in fact, we might well be toxic.
We want you to be our slaves! Seriously? Dude, build yourselves some robots or enslave one of your own minority groups. It'll be hella cheaper and easier than flying thousands of light years and then having to administer a planetful of slaves on a world that almost certainly does not match your native environment anyway.



If I saw an alien and it did not look dangerous / was not behaving in a threatening way, I would cautiously approach and try to make contact. If it didn't speak the language I would try to get some basic concepts like "not hurt I" across, then call for experts. (I'd have to think about how to accomplish that, though, without people assuming it was a hoax.)

If it did speak the language(*), I'd find out why it was here and ask if it wanted to trade or just give me something.


(*) It's not at all unreasonable that the alien could speak our language. Our radio / TV broadcasts reach lightyears out into space and contain more than enough information to learn the language(s).

[rlc]

After a certain point, I'm pretty sure the signal would just get garbled and they'd think we sounded like static. Of course, it wouldn't take terribly long to work out some kind of language, even if it's just a sign language.

[golentan]

While I generally agree with Eaglejarl on the futility of interstellar war of any scale, I do have one correction to make on RLC's comments...


As for the invasion strategy, they'd most likely attack a poor area first anyway, just to gain a base of operations. That is, unless they can just outright destroy us, which would actually be pretty difficult without weapons of mass destruction, and I'm assuming they'd want keep the planet in a usable state.

A gravity well is itself a weapon of mass destruction. Using only the potential energy of earth's gravity well, a one ton object dropped on earth would strike with force comparable to a small atomic weapon. At velocities needed to travel interstellar space in a human lifetime, you could easily scale to a planet buster using only kinetic energy.

So, remember, all you folks talking about murdering people and taking their spaceship: Any civilization capable of interstellar travel has energy manipulation on the scale necessary to sterilize the surface of earth of all but the hardiest life (protip: bacteria, not animals). The fact that you are breathing is proof that they aren't hostile, but that might change if their diplomat was murdered. So play nice, little apes, because while war is hard, extermination is easy.

[Fragenstein]

At velocities needed to travel interstellar space in a human lifetime, you could easily scale to a planet buster using only kinetic energy.

Are you sure that human lifetimes are relevant here? People always assume that interstellar travelers think in terms of decades or even centuries. Maybe they measure their time in spans of human millennia?

Or maybe your unique background already tells you that they do...

[golentan]

Are you sure that human lifetimes are relevant here? People always assume that interstellar travelers think in terms of decades or even centuries. Maybe they measure their time in spans of human millennia?

Or maybe your unique background already tells you that they do...

My comparative understanding of time is hobbled by the absence of a common frame of reference. But I'm pretty sure centuries is too long for travel times.

[Fragenstein]

My comparative understanding of time is hobbled by the absence of a common frame of reference. But I'm pretty sure centuries is too long for travel times.

I've often wondered about that. We get so tied up in solving the faster-than-light issue, we never stop to think that it might be insurmountable. Any successful space-faring race may have, out of necessity, surrendered their native environment and mortality for qualities better adapted to the greater universe.

[golentan]

I've often wondered about that. We get so tied up in solving the faster-than-light issue, we never stop to think that it might be insurmountable. Any successful space-faring race may have, out of necessity, surrendered their native environment and mortality for qualities better adapted to the greater universe.

Faster than light isn't a problem. Taking a couple decades to reach a new location is a doable thing. But at a minimum I'd want to be travelling at a significant chunk of C (single digit decimal range) before I set out on interstellar explorations.

[Fragenstein]

Faster than light isn't a problem. Taking a couple decades to reach a new location is a doable thing. But at a minimum I'd want to be travelling at a significant chunk of C (single digit decimal range) before I set out on interstellar explorations.

You'd never survive your first engine failure or nav drop. It'd be like a stalled sea cruise, only with fewer gulls.

A thousand days or a thousand years. Only the unprepared can tell the difference. Elder races have forgiven Time.

[Archonic Energy]

Option 3
"Bah-weep-graaaaagnah wheep nini bong." Meanwhile, on my phone I queue up the quote of Optimus Prime saying "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" in case the creature spouts something about subjugating the planet.


Heh. Queue Eric idle talking TV.

Anyway the Most likely senario would be like that scene from Paul.

[golentan]

You'd never survive your first engine failure or nav drop. It'd be like a stalled sea cruise, only with fewer gulls.

A thousand days or a thousand years. Only the unprepared can tell the difference. Elder races have forgiven Time.

Sure you would survive such a thing. You just have to have the foresight not to put all your eggs in one body.

I'm a big fan of distributed asynchronous consciousness.

[Fragenstein]

Sure you would survive such a thing. You just have to have the foresight not to put all your eggs in one body.

I'm a big fan of distributed asynchronous consciousness.

At which point you bypass the temporary nature of mortality and can safely ignore the passing of time, making it possible to take as many thousands of years as you need to get where you're going.

Simple! :)

[golentan]

At which point you bypass the temporary nature of mortality and can safely ignore the passing of time, making it possible to take as many thousands of years as you need to get where you're going.

Simple! :)

Heaven forfend that I should fall into the complacency of age. There are things that have to be waited out, plans which may take centuries or millennia to come to fruition, works that take thousands of lifetimes to build, and these are great things that I hope to live to see. But I don't want my vision to become so obscured by the slow ticking away of eons that I forget that even in a life unlimited by death in the short term, time is a cap on everything.

I've lived 8000 years on earth, some 400 generations, more than 250 lives. And you know what it feels like? 250 lifetimes, 249 more than most people get, 249 new chances, new beginnings, new opportunities to live and love and learn stories, 249 chances to forget and throw away cares into the wild abandon of childhood. I shudder to think what that time would have been like, alone with the same handful of people waiting for a tiny bubble to traverse vast gulfs of space, waiting while civilizations flared to life, lived, and died unseen, unheard, and unmourned while I slowly ran out of stories to tell and dreams to dream, when I might have as easily spent that time in the company of friends, or when I might have found those people and made new ones if I were more willing to throw the dice and act quickly.

Give me the quicksilver passions of the fair folk, for whom immortality is an invitation to live life without fear of what tomorrow will bring, to find new playthings and adventures, to revisit old glories and above all to find new passions and evolve. Because if you're not evolving, you're decaying. If you're the same person at 10,000 as you were at 5,000, you may as well have been dead the whole time. Immortality is not an opportunity to sink into quiescence and vanish into the mists of time, it's an invitation to take risks unhindered by the threat of death, to push ahead with grand plans and to get lost in the minutiae of life and the rapid eddies of happenstance but still have time to find your way out. It doesn't have to be wild abandon all the time, mind, I find much more joy sitting in with friends talking about nothing than going out in a blaze of hedonistic glory, but it should always be new.

[Fragenstein]

Heaven forfend that I should fall into the complacency of age. There are things that have to be waited out, plans which may take centuries or millennia to come to fruition, works that take thousands of lifetimes to build, and these are great things that I hope to live to see. But I don't want my vision to become so obscured by the slow ticking away of eons that I forget that even in a life unlimited by death in the short term, time is a cap on everything.

I've lived 8000 years on earth, some 400 generations, more than 250 lives. And you know what it feels like? 250 lifetimes, 249 more than most people get, 249 new chances, new beginnings, new opportunities to live and love and learn stories, 249 chances to forget and throw away cares into the wild abandon of childhood. I shudder to think what that time would have been like, alone with the same handful of people waiting for a tiny bubble to traverse vast gulfs of space, waiting while civilizations flared to life, lived, and died unseen, unheard, and unmourned while I slowly ran out of stories to tell and dreams to dream, when I might have as easily spent that time in the company of friends, or when I might have found those people and made new ones if I were more willing to throw the dice and act quickly.

Give me the quicksilver passions of the fair folk, for whom immortality is an invitation to live life without fear of what tomorrow will bring, to find new playthings and adventures, to revisit old glories and above all to find new passions and evolve. Because if you're not evolving, you're decaying. If you're the same person at 10,000 as you were at 5,000, you may as well have been dead the whole time. Immortality is not an opportunity to sink into quiescence and vanish into the mists of time, it's an invitation to take risks unhindered by the threat of death, to push ahead with grand plans and to get lost in the minutiae of life and the rapid eddies of happenstance but still have time to find your way out. It doesn't have to be wild abandon all the time, mind, I find much more joy sitting in with friends talking about nothing than going out in a blaze of hedonistic glory, but it should always be new.

Your soul has been poisoned by the myriad beatings of human hearts, the circadian rhythms of solar lockstep, and the insane brevity of rebirth. Just as an aphid sees fulfillment in its quick passing, so have you fallen to the dizzying illusion of mortal eyes. Renewal over decades, centuries, or ages measured by the deaths of stars only matter to the immature.

Change as you will change, but remembering the hour will not mark that evolution in greatness. Live to each step between stars. Keep to the journey as only a passing, one without measure.

I say again to forgive time. It will not breed a better beast.

[golentan]

I have no need to forgive time, for it's done nothing wrong. I have no need for it to breed a better beast, for I will choose my own path as I walk it. You've been hypnotized by the illusion of eternity.

All things die. The seductive dangerousness of immortality is that it gives the illusion that opportunities aren't passed up, that there will always be a tomorrow with some new chance, and so why gamble on this one? But even as your life stretches indefinitely, the same opportunities will not repeat twice. Eternity isn't long enough to experience the universe in full, and each moment that you put off because there will be another one is another moment unlived, another opportunity lost.

I don't measure my life in time, I measure it in stories, in triumphs and failures, in opportunities seized and lost, in moments of relaxation and periods of struggle. A life that is temporally extended without being richer in such things is not a longer life, only a prolonged one. No matter how fast or slow you run, death will find you, and that's not a bad thing. But in the intervening time, I'd much rather live the life I have and revel in the eternal now than delude myself that even a trillion years is equivalent to eternity and delay my life waiting for that.

I don't know if I'll outlive the stars or they'll outlive me, but I know that while they're beautiful and vast compared to the simplest bacterium I find them poor company, and the space between them lacks even their mathematical elegance. I can predict the future paths of the stars, and their changes from one state to another out towards the end of time, but I can't see what that little bacteria may become given a billion years with any sort of clarity. And if I while away that time passing through the depths of space with nothing to gaze at but my own navel, I may arrive too late to know that that life existed at all, much less to admire its growth.

Patience is a virtue, and one I've found useful over the centuries. Apathy and sloth feel more like its antithesis.

[Fragenstein]

I have no need to forgive time, for it's done nothing wrong. I have no need for it to breed a better beast, for I will choose my own path as I walk it. You've been hypnotized by the illusion of eternity.

All things die. The seductive dangerousness of immortality is that it gives the illusion that opportunities aren't passed up, that there will always be a tomorrow with some new chance, and so why gamble on this one? But even as your life stretches indefinitely, the same opportunities will not repeat twice. Eternity isn't long enough to experience the universe in full, and each moment that you put off because there will be another one is another moment unlived, another opportunity lost.

I don't measure my life in time, I measure it in stories, in triumphs and failures, in opportunities seized and lost, in moments of relaxation and periods of struggle. A life that is temporally extended without being richer in such things is not a longer life, only a prolonged one. No matter how fast or slow you run, death will find you, and that's not a bad thing. But in the intervening time, I'd much rather live the life I have and revel in the eternal now than delude myself that even a trillion years is equivalent to eternity and delay my life waiting for that.

I don't know if I'll outlive the stars or they'll outlive me, but I know that while they're beautiful and vast compared to the simplest bacterium I find them poor company, and the space between them lacks even their mathematical elegance. I can predict the future paths of the stars, and their changes from one state to another out towards the end of time, but I can't see what that little bacteria may become given a billion years with any sort of clarity. And if I while away that time passing through the depths of space with nothing to gaze at but my own navel, I may arrive too late to know that that life existed at all, much less to admire its growth.

Patience is a virtue, and one I've found useful over the centuries. Apathy and sloth feel more like its antithesis.

You've become the traveler who needs slay the journey, one who fears the great everlasting. Our aphid looks upon your sloth and begs you to stop sleeping through the hours of your life. You look upon an elder and wonder what has become of their aeons. The greater races look upon you and blink. Your patience of centuries is their quickened step. Your bacteria of a billion years is their growing ally.

They die, as does all, but not before the aphid. They act, as must life, just not in ways you comprehend. They do not slay the journey. They simply outlive it.

The gulping of life at a frenetic pace, in a panic for what might be lost, stumbles the longer walk. The unforgiven time plies savage works upon your imperfect now. You worry about reaching the destination before it is gone. Concern yourself more with the arrivals without end.

[golentan]

Oddly enough, I feel little need to be lectured on eternity and perspective by someone who has almost certainly lived one life, in one body, on one lonely planet, from a civilization younger than I am, and frankly who will be dead in a blip. Ciao.

[Karoht]

Oddly enough, I feel little need to be lectured on eternity and perspective by someone who has almost certainly lived one life, in one body, on one lonely planet, from a civilization younger than I am, and frankly who will be dead in a blip. Ciao.
"Oh, you have some kind of data disc to show us all the information of your whole planet? Well, let's have a look shall we?
Lets see here...
Rubbish.
Rubbish.
You people solved the Higgs Boson with a Particle Accelerator? Crude don't you think? That's like smashing two planets together to see what they're made of. No, bad example, it's like learning about fission by building bombs made of... oh, I see you did that too. Right. Garbage. Next.
Crap.
Junk.
That thing flies? You're joking. That thing is a joke. A bigger joke than your cars still running on petrol, if you can believe it.
Oh, look at that, that's cute, your people tried building ships that looked like saucers because you thought we flew around in flying saucers. Awww. That's precious. We don't, that's rubbish, you people are idiots.
Rubbish.
Rubbish.
Fallacy.
Pffft. You wish that was how gravity works.
Oooh, this Einstein chap sounds like he might have been a bit a clever. Well, he was half right, but that's still something. His mate, this Hawking fellow, right clever clogs he is. Oh, they're not mates these two? Shame that.
Junk.
Never work. Next.
Cancer? Your people are still fighting Cancer? But the solution is right there! No no, not there, THERE! Oh, forget it.
Rubbish.
Rubbish.
Complete Rubbish.
Ooh, you lot make alcohol. Well, you got at least one thing right. No species we've ever crossed paths with survived for long without alcohol.
Nope.
Nope.
Nope, nope nope nope, nope, nope!
Oye. You people invent the internet, and the greatest use you can think of for it, aside from naughty pictures, is Twitter?
Oh, that is it. That's it. We are leaving. We'll check back with you lot in 1000 years, see if you've pulled up your pants by then. That's 1000 of your 'earth years' starting today. Ah, what's the use, you lot will forget all about us after we leave, and then you'll make up some stupid story about how we kidnapped you with laser beams and poked you in bad places and all that nonsense."
*space ship zooms away*

[Asta Kask]

If I met an extra-terrestrial? I would ask golentan how ze was and then have a discussion about RP rules.