Illithid Buffet: Whose Brain is What Flavor?

[Arlanthe]

Remember strip #31 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0031.html)? I was just wondering what that mind flayer would see if it peered at other characters in the strip.

I don't know if this one has been done before, but I thought it would be fun to "foodify" the brains of some other characters. And maybe even put a little byline, like in the strip.

Thog: A pile of sawdust. "Only digestible by termites".
Miko: Ginger root. "Too raw and biting".
Nale: Broccoli & Cheese with pork bits. "Nutritious, but gassy".

[Blackdog]

Hilgya: Raspberry sorbet; "Sour, yet rich."
Pompey: A slice of cheesecake; "Soft and chewy."
Xykon; "Hey! Someone already got his!"

[ShiningTed]

Redcloak: A joint roasted in herbs; "delicious, but a very bitter aftertaste"

[Arlanthe]

Redcloak: A joint roasted in herbs; "delicious, but a very bitter aftertaste"

Er... a joint?

[Rumda]

of beef extra

[PirateMonk]

:roach: A cherry: small, but sweet.

[Greebo]

Shojo would be a multilayered casserole, each layer more rich than the last, but with some fun, light seasoning mixed in.

[Iranon]

Roy: a straightforward burger... but made of first-rate beef.

[Greebo]

Um, No - Roy is a turkey dinner. The main chars have already BEEN classed. See the linked strip...

The point was, what would the non OOTS members be rated as...

[PirateMonk]

Here's a theory:

Taste=Intelligence
Nutrition=Wisdom

This fails for Belkar, though- if tacos are delicious. He could be hiding something though...

[Green Bean]

Hinjo- unseasoned pork kebab. Tasty and fairly nutricious, but without too much subtlety of flavour

[factotum]

Here's a theory:

Taste=Intelligence
Nutrition=Wisdom


Fails for Roy, too--why would a fighter have an Intelligence higher than a spellcaster like Vaarsuvius?

[Acrux]

But Roy's intelligence may very well be equal to, or higher, than V's.

[Goofy]

Fails for Roy, too--why would a fighter have an Intelligence higher than a spellcaster like Vaarsuvius?

It's been repeatedly stated that Roy has a very high Intelligence score.

[Lizard Lord]

Fails for Roy, too--why would a fighter have an Intelligence higher than a spellcaster like Vaarsuvius?

Roy's intelligence is either equal to or only a little bit lower then :vaarsuvius: 's but his wisdom is much higher and I beleive it was this balance of intelligence and wisdom that made Roy look better then :vaarsuvius:

Man whoever made Roy must be good at rolling. We know he has high int, wisdom, and being a warrior he should have at least deccent strength and con. If any of his stats are low it would have to be his dex.

[Jazzvader]

O-Chule- Burger like V but with Ketchup only.

[MReav]

Hmmm...

Assuming at a point where they are alive:

Leeky: Salad.
Yik Yik: Taco (like Belkar, but with different meat).
Julio Scoundrel: Ice Cream Parfait, but with extra Chocolate Sauce and Whipped Cream (think Haley, but with more sweetness)
Yok Yok: Chicken Fingers with a sweet dipping sauce.
Samantha: Extra Spicy Chicken Wings with a good, sweet dipping sauce (sweet tasting, but heartburn inducing)

By the way, attitude also is to be taken into account. Belkar has a decent intelligence but he's always pissed.

I also assume Charisma represents a certain sweetness, and I tend to represent it (when dealing with decently intelligent characters) with dipping sauces and marinades.

[PirateMonk]

Fails for Roy, too--why would a fighter have an Intelligence higher than a spellcaster like Vaarsuvius?

If you like turkey better than burgers.

[Green Bean]

Roy's intelligence is either equal to or only a little bit lower then :vaarsuvius: 's but his wisdom is much higher and I beleive it was this balance of intelligence and wisdom that made Roy look better then :vaarsuvius:

Man whoever made Roy must be good at rolling. We know he has high int, wisdom, and being a warrior he should have at least deccent strength and con. If any of his stats are low it would have to be his dex.

IIRC, Giant said that Roy has a fairly low Con (for a fighter)

[PirateMonk]

:nale: One of those really fancy cakes that looks great but really tastes like chalk.

[Quirinus_Obsidian]

:mitd: Musty Styrofoam.

:sabine: Dark chocolate covered cherries. dipped in blood. cuz you know.. evil.

[Jacob_Gallagher]

The drunk wizard (that gets eaten): I'd say probably like a rum cake... Not that much flavor (nobody cares about him) but very strong alcohol(depths of despair).

[mikeejimbo]

:mitd: Fruitcake. He's nutty.

[Haruki-kun]

Mr. Scruffy: Breakfast Muffin, "Sweet and Fluffy, but too small."

[Professor Tanhauser]

The Oracle: A pile of crushed almonds. Sharp and bitter.

[dragongirl13]

It's:

Intelligence: Fillingness
Wisdom: Healthiness
Charisma: Tastiness.

Therefore, I can try classifying the new Linear Guild.

Nale: A good-tasting energy bar.
Sabine: Ice cream. But no cherry. Cherries are at least a little filling and nutritious.
Thog: A vitamin pill. But one of those vitamins that's not really very good.
Pompey: A hot dog. With ketchup and mustard.
Leeky: A leek. >:D
Yokyok: An instant meal that only fills you up halfway and tastes a bit like chocolate soymilk.

[mikeejimbo]

If that was all there was to it though, Elan would have been tastier than a Diet Coke. In fact, he'd have been more like the sundae.

But I think that personality is also in it, because Haley is sweet, and so is a sundae.

[Lizard Lord]

IIRC, Giant said that Roy has a fairly low Con (for a fighter)

Well then he isn't a very good meat shield is he? :smallbiggrin:

[Arlanthe]

I never did understand why the illithid went after the Turkey.

I imagine Roy has an Int score of 16, and varsuvius 18.

I thought of one more:

Hinjo: Sushi platter. "Delicious and nutritious".

[Rumda]

roy has a higher combined int wis and cha score than V has

[MReav]

Well then he isn't a very good meat shield is he? :smallbiggrin:

He fudges his HD rolls.

[ObadiahtheSlim]

Sojo: A gourmet chicken teriyaki dinner (he has very good mental scores)
Miko: General Tso's chicken from an americanized chinese place. (will give heartburn much like Belkar, but without rapeing your colon like tacos do)
Hinjo: Sushi (decent all round mental scores)

[Miklus]

I see it more like:
INT=calories per gram
WIS=overall calories
Flavor=personality

Thog: One of those fluffy diet rice biscuits.

Xykon: Day-old salmon...Delicious and nutrisious, but will come back with a vengence!

Miko: Paraboiled rice...Not quite coherrent.

Celia: A candyfloss. Sweet and lightweight, but quickly gone and no, you can't have another!

Julia: Chocolate softice, anyone?

Nale: A Red Bull. It will kill ya!

Sabrine: A Devil Girl Choco Bar. "It's BAD for you!"

PS: Maybe I should explain that Red Bull is banned in Denmark, Norway and France due to too many suspisious heart attacks in young people.

[MReav]

Goblin Dan: Hydra (Which, in all likelihood, will taste like chicken)

[Hyrael]

Here's a theory:

Taste=Intelligence
Nutrition=Wisdom

This fails for Belkar, though- if tacos are delicious. He could be hiding something though...
No,

Int=greasyness, like fries, burgers, and so on, as well as creamyness, like milk. Good, strong flavors that arent sweet.
Cha= sweetness
wis=heartyness. Wisdom fills you up and gives you that contented stuck-to-the-ribs feeling, but lacks actual flavor.

[Jazzvader]

If you ask me :vaarsuvius: or :roy: should have been a Lasagne, Tasty and quite nutritious

[factotum]

roy has a higher combined int wis and cha score than V has

One wonders why he keeps failing his Will saving throws, then. :smallbiggrin:

[Hyrael]

Roy's intelligence is either equal to or only a little bit lower then :vaarsuvius: 's but his wisdom is much higher and I beleive it was this balance of intelligence and wisdom that made Roy look better then :vaarsuvius:

Man whoever made Roy must be good at rolling. We know he has high int, wisdom, and being a warrior he should have at least deccent strength and con. If any of his stats are low it would have to be his dex.

Here's a rough guesstimate

Str 15-16
dex 12-14
con 11-13
int 16
wis 13-14
cha 12

[MReav]

One wonders why he keeps failing his Will saving throws, then. :smallbiggrin:

Wizards have higher base Will Saves, and when has Roy failed a Will Save since the Unholy Blight?

Actually, when was the last time Roy MADE a save?

[AyuVince]

Everyone seems to agree on Hinjo being sushi... which is great, since I like both Hinjo and sushi.

Let's see... who is left?

Random Hobgoblin: French fries. Cheap french fries made from potato peels and soaked in greasy oil.

The Shadowdancer assassin from the hotel: Extra-thin dark chocolate slices. So tasty, yet so evanescent..

Random paladin: Organically grown salad and 100% orange juice with added vitamins and calcium. Good for you, but so healthy it annoys the heck out of you.

[Silverlocke980]

One of my favorite threads.

Now! For random folk:

Ninja Girl: Green tea. Sweet, but the taste flits away quickly.
(Ninja Fast!)

Monster in the Dark: I have a feeling he'd taste like pickles. Kind of low class and beneath a truly refined palate, but fulfilling in its very baseness.
(...I eat too much.)

Sabine: Pizza with a lot of sausage and pepper on it. 'Cause she's spicy.
(Sausage is not meant to mean something else!)

[MasterOfEternit]

If we have to base it on mental scores, then...

:vaarsuvius: - deer roast
:thog: - Uh... dirt
:sabine: - candies with a bitter aftertaste
:roy: - teriyaki chicken sticks
:roach: - cherry
:belkar: - warheads™ sour candy
:xykon: - ... dusty remains
:haley: - icecream
:durkon: - pop rocks™
:elan: - butter
:miko: - burnt toast with "I'll smite thee!" written on it
:mitd: - Hm... undecided...
:nale: - chocolate-covered almonds
:redcloak: - old chocolate with bitter aftetaste

Sorry if I seem a little lost (I just joined the forums, and this is my first post... and it's midnight and I have school in the morning. *Sigh.*) but... well, there you go.

Oh, and great comics. I love them all (started reading them Thursday last week, finished reading them on Saturday... waiting for updates. :smallbiggrin: ) so, uh... yeah. Keep 'em coming.

>>MOE

[Celleron]

Hmmm...
Zzdtri': Dark Chocolate Cake; bitter at first but relatively sweet afterwards:smallbiggrin:
Leaky: Garden Salad with Very little dressing; surprisingly fresh but becomes bland after a while.
Elan(now):elan: : A can of Original Coke

[MReav]

MitD: Doesn't taste like anything because the Illithid ain't breaking through its DR.

But he wouldn't want it anyways.

[factotum]

Actually, when was the last time Roy MADE a save?

When he was fighting Miko she stunned him--presumably there would have been a failed saving throw involved there.

[Sethis]

Stunning Fist is a Fort save.

[Teh_Jakester]

:elan: has upgraded. He is no longer a Diet Coke, but a Diet Mountain Dew.

[TheOtherMC]

:elan: has upgraded. He is no longer a Diet Coke, but a Diet Mountain Doom.

"and not that yucky Code Red stuff either". :smallbiggrin:

[Teh_Jakester]

"and not that yucky Code Red stuff either". :smallbiggrin:

HEY! That's what I'm drinking right now!

[TheOtherMC]

HEY! That's what I'm drinking right now!

Sorry, "Origin of the PC" joke. Code Red rocks though, hard.

[Teh_Jakester]

Sorry, "Origin of the PC" joke. Code Red rocks though, hard.

Damn, I need to read that...

[Not a Paladin]

Now, for the (core) Linear Guild (according to me):

:nale:: spaghetti sauce (tasty, but it needs more substance)
:thog:: rock salt (...definitely not)
:sabine:: massive thallium-coated chocolate bar (deadly, but tasty)

Temporary Linear Guild members:

Hilgya: homemade beer (any port in a storm, I guess)
Yikyik: denatured alcohol (I don't even want to know how bad this brain is)
Zz'dtri: rice (very good, but not filling enough on its own)
Pompey: slightly undercooked beef (Hey! I wanted it well done!)
Leeky: grass (not tasty or filling, but it sure is healthy)
Yokyok: chocolate bar (tasty, but not healthy enough)

[MReav]

When he was fighting Miko she stunned him--presumably there would have been a failed saving throw involved there.

I think I should rephrase: when was the last time he has successfully made a save? I can't remember a single one.

I remember him getting Fireballed, Firestormed, Poisoned, Stunned, Sloshed in barbecue sauce, hit by an Unholy Blight, and had his sword Shattered (attended object). Roy needs to invest in a Cloak of Resistance. Seriously.

[Arlanthe]

Pompei: Fetuchini ALfredo- Tasty and nutritious, but also unhealthy
Julia: Brussel Sprouts- Very nutritious, but not so tasty and very bitter

Heh, I also thought the "Thog = rice cake" comment was funny, the best for his so far I think.

[Firestar27]

Zz'dtri = an exact copy of whatever Drizz't is. More lawers will come.

[Woot Spitum]

Zz'dtri-The newest recipe for chicken and rice casserole (not bad, but its been done before).
Sabine-Devil's food cake (looks great, but you know you'll regret it later).
Nale-Nacho ice cream burger (some combinations are just too complex).
Thog-Off brand cereal bar (tastes like sawdust, only half as nutritious).

[donkyhotay]

You forgot the CPPD rookie! He would taste like a "carrot" <wink wink>. Seriously though I bet he'd probably taste similar to roy. Maybe a roast chicken instead of roast turkey. I think miko would be like belkar and end up giving the illithoid heartburn or something.

[MReav]

You forgot the CPPD rookie! He would taste like a "carrot" <wink wink>.

I get the reference, and I think it fails the analogy test.

[EntilZha]

:smalltongue: Julia: Cherry Pie

:xykon: : Not much meat at all, and probably, to quote Gene Wilder in "Young Frankenstein", "Has a rotten brain."
:smallbiggrin:

Zz'tdri: Chocolate covered ants (there's not much meat beyond arthropods in the Underdark)

Leeky: Wheat germ extract

:sabine: : Someone mentioned Devil's food cake, so I gotta round out the trifecta: Deviled Eggs or Deviled Ham.

Yikyik and Yokyok: Taste like chicken. :smalltongue:

[dragongirl13]

I'm not so sure about Roy having a higher int wis and cha than V does. Roy's wisdom is crap, hence his horrid sense motive.

[Sage in the Playground]

Whats wrong with his sense motive?

[the_tick_rules]

hey maybe that's it. it sure upsetted V.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Man, I wish I was a mind flayer in Oots World. This thread is makin' me hungry. Anyway....

:elan: Has definitely upgraded to a Mountain Dew. :smallwink:
:redcloak: Probably Chile. Good, but spicy and all...evil.
:mitd:....Coke Zero. Not too smart from what we know.

[Akaziel]

Yikyik - A taco like Belkar, but less angry.

Yokyok - Mexican Parfait (Parfait + Taco)

:thog: - An empty plate

:sabine: - Anything with too much oil/MSG. Tasty. Filling. Deadly.

:miko: - Spicy Noodles. Stick sold separately.

:nale: - Similar to Durkon, only even less filling and more complicated.

[BisectedBrioche]

:nale: Someone's said Red Bull. I'd agree but make it sugar free Red Bull, with its horrible bitter aftertaste
:sabine: Red Bull mixed with pure ethanol - it appears sweet but it'll weaken and kill you
:thog: Brightly coloured cardboard
:miko: Sour milk <_< >_>
:roach: A single chocolate coated peanut
:xykon: Delicious and nutritious air
:redcloak: Collapsed souffle

[Purple_cloack]

hmmm...

:miko: Tasty, but maybe too spicy...
:nale: mmmm...tasty and good-looking...
:thog: too small...brains, of course!
:mitd: i dont eat things what i can't see.
:belkar: Needs pepper.