Favorite lines from each character

[Professor Tanhauser]

Ok, what are you favorite lines from your favorite characters?

Xykon: "I think I just had an evilgasm." (Had to be.)
Roy: .."soak my brain in acid now." (BTW, I'm totally disappointed some of you so called artists haven't illoed that yet.)
Belkar: "It was worse at my height."
Haley: ".....his 18 charisma is worth under the hood."

[kpenguin]

Obviously, V: "I prepared Explosive Runes today."

[Jawajoey]

I was cracking up when I read Xykon's line today. "It's funny because it's true!" That's an automatic favorite right there. (The humor is from the context, though)

Roy: Dad? But you an Mom are both dead.
Roy's Dad: Yeah, funny thing about being a ghost. It has some harsh prerequisites.

And while we're on the topic of Roy and his father:
Roy: Just curious, do you get XP for killing this dramatic moment?

Redcloak: Proof once more that you paladins have zero ranks in Knowledge (What the Hell You're Talking About) skill.

Then the ones in my sig, of course.

[Demented]

" You have one round to make this worthwhile, or I push the "Eviscerate" button on TeeVo's remote. "
-Xykon

TeeVo has an Eviscerate button? Apparently, evil lich masterminds are the only market for expensive high-magic entertainment gizmos.

" The Holey Brotherhood believes in the right for holes to exist! "
-Anonymous cultist of the Holey Brotherhood

[Black of Night]

:xykon: "I think I just had and evilgasm"

:sabine: "Heck, I had sex four times while I was away." :nale: "You-you were gone for three hours!" :sabine: "Yeah, well, I had errands to run too."

:roy: "No, no, see, this IS the alternate universe, I need to find my way back home to the real world." - "Actually wait - never mind, stop looking."

Perhaps more later.

[Haruki-kun]

Celia's:
Hey, I don't make the rules..... I just twist them to my purpose.

That's also funny because it's true...... I mean who doesn't?

[Rumda]

:xykon:Sacrificing minions: Is there any problem it CAN'T solve

[dragongirl13]

Okay... scanning memory for quotes... Aha!

:roy:: Proof once more that we are the only adventuring party for which ADD stands for Attention Deficit Disorder.

:haley:: (In cryptograms) Treasure! Gone! All of it gone! I can't believe it's gone! I got eaten by a dragon for that freakin' treasure!

:elan:: Woooooooooooooooooooooooo! I'm invisible! You can't see me!

:vaarsuvius:: Give in to your anger, young Greenhilt! Strike him down and take your place by my side!

:durkon:: THE TREES BE ATTACKIN'! RUN FOR YER LIVES!

:belkar:: I took Craft Disturbing Mental Image as my feat last level.

:xykon:: I think I just had an evilgasm.

:redcloak:: Yes, you've figured me out, my desire to formulate a basic strategy for our impeding invasion is based solely on being unable to roll five of a kind.

:mitd:: Aww, man! I lost twice! I suck.

:nale:: Hello? Evil Opposite theme? I'm not seeing it. This goatee isn't just for show, you know.

:sabine:: (No quote.)

:thog:: Yay! Group hug!

[Zirael]

My favourite is:

:belkar: : 'Wait! I think I just failed a spot check'
Goblin Ninja: 'Umm...we're like RIGHT here'
:belkar: : 'Wait! I think I just failed a listen check'

[jng2058]

Gotta be:

:roy: : Your approval fills me with shame.

[Tornek the Unhygenic]

:thog: *sigh* thog fears that thog will never again know the majasty of the gumdrop mountains.

I laughed out loud at that one!

[Vix]

:redcloak: Proof once more that you paladins have zero ranks in Knowledge (What the Hell You're Talking About) skill.

:belkar: It starts with 's' and ends with 'litting their throats'

:mitd: But anyway, back to this gate I hear so much about...

[Silverlocke980]

Any lines involving Roy and disbelief at Elan/Belkar/Nale/The Entire Universe, and the "Holy Crap! Did you see that-" Julia line when Durkon unleashes the largest bolt in Thor's arsenal on Leeky Windstaff.

In fact, my favorite funny line in the comic isn't a line at all; it's when Leeky Windstaff's trees get blown to bits by Thor's thunderclap. The conversation preceding it was great.

"One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three..."

[Flying Zombie]

Well, I'll have to work on the other characters a bit, but at least for one character, it's a no-brainer.

:haley: "Sneak attack, b*tch!"

Elan has a million great lines, but for now, I'll go with

:elan: "Banjo works in mysterious ways."

[Einar]

From #38 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0038.html)-
Belkar probably scribbled on the wall: Lawful stupid -> :roy:

[Don Julio Anejo]

:vaarsuvius: YOU [Belkar] can use them.
:belkar: Sh'yeah right. I'm a warrior, the only thing I can do with a scroll is beat someone with it.
:vaarsuvius: Belkar, you are a RANGER!!
:belkar: So what? That just means I can beat him with both scrolls at the same time!!

[Awesome Girl]

I really like:
:redcloak: Here's what I'm offering: Talk about strategy with me for 10 minutes and this hobgoblin will hit this other hobgoblin in the face with a banana cream pie
:roy: "Honey, we're out of milk." "Clearly, that means that the gods want me to kill you!" Slash! Slash ! Slash!
:belkar: You made a mistake here, I'm chaotic.
:haley: News flash, Roy: every quest we've done has been all about YOU. "I want to beat Xykon, I want the starmetal, I want to bump uglies with the paladin." :miko: The propler term is "smite evil" not "bump uglies"

[mockingbyrd7]

From #400 up:

TeeVo: Teevo?

:xykon: Yahtzee! Yes!
:redcloak: Sir, shouldn't we be planning for tomorrow's battle?
:xykon: Feh, you're just mad because I keep winning fair and square!
:redcloak: Yes, you've figured me out, my desire to formulate a basic strategy for our impending invasion is solely because I am unable to roll a five of a kind.

Azure City War Council Guy: No, sir, the bugbears are the hobgoblins. The hobgoblins are the undead.

:miko: The proper term is "smite evil", not "bump uglies".
:miko: The laws have no meaning! They were rewritten by the enemy himself over his 47 years on the throne! Only Honor and the will of the gods matter now! As the highest-ranking paladin in the Sapphire Guard, I find you guilty of Treason!
Shojo: Everything I did, I did for my people.
*divine animal meeting*
Shojo: It appears... not everyone agrees with your... analysis. *dies*

:roy: No no, see, this IS the alternate universe, I need to find my way back to the real world. Actually, wait- never mind, stop looking.

:haley: I had a... change of priorities.

:elan: ...Wanna make out?

:belkar: Forceful assertation of open resentment towards authority. *pause* Please view accompanying hand gesture.

:belkar: YOU KILLED THE WACKY OLD DUDE WITH THE CAT?!?!

[MReav]

Illusionary Belkar: Forceful assertion of open resentment towards authority!

[Not a Paladin]

Lien: Your uncle was a very private person, sir. He forbade anyone from touching his junk.

Hinjo: Are there still evacuees waiting to board a ship?
Lien: Oh, yes, sir. I imagine I'll have no trouble finding people willing to get aboard your junk. It should be able to hold many passengers.
Hinjo: I agree, my junk appears to be quite long...
:roy:: Wider than I would have expected, too.

(by "junk", the characters mean a type of flat-bottomed boat, though I don't know why I'm saying this seeing as this is in today's strip)