Elvenoutrider
2014-07-06, 07:39 PM
so for my upcoming dungeon, the boss at the end will be a bard who makes fun of each of the party members. His chosen performance is comedy so I figure he will need a few jokes to throw around for his minions to laugh at. After climbing a sloped ramp covered in grease and caltrops, having bee bags and alchemist fire thrown at them under a hail of arrows, they will have to deal with him and his bandit bodyguards swinging on ropes. Some of the spells i have prepared are blindness, sleep, mad monkeys, animate rope, shatter, and suggestion.
The party is made up of:
1) a "Snakeman" naga aspirant druid trying to make a kingdom safe for monsters
2) A deposed dhampir lord magus with a whip made from his brother's flayed skin
3) a chaotic evil rogue trying to secretly raise a group of brigands to power
4) a young female witch with a cackle based build, known for refusing to bathe
5) a warforged front line fighter with an erased memory who aspires to join a lawful good order
6) A heal build cleric of the god of the sun
I am making a list of one liners to give during the different phases. so far I have:
1) Ah Bastion the warforged, all the strength of a cavalry charge with none of the subtlety
2) after shattering a bow: That's the problem with archery, too many drawbacks
3)I'm not mad, I'm differently sane
4) Moron runs into a spear! What a Prick!
5)Time flies like an arrow, This flies like a (Insert projectile here)
6) Build a man a fire and hes warm for a day, set a man on fire and hes warm for the rest of his life
7)Insane? I'm a libra!
8)Let there Be Blight!!! (Throws bee bag)
9)Don't listen to him, Hes crazy!
10)Take me to your bleeder!
What I am looking for are jokes that fit the party and that is where I am struggling. I am going to try and get under the Dhampirs skin by claiming to have the same backstory but other than him and the warforged I have nothing party specific. Can any of the wittier members help me tailor this encounter or add some jokes you have used? I would appreciate it especially since I am hoping this will be a recurring enemy.
The party is made up of:
1) a "Snakeman" naga aspirant druid trying to make a kingdom safe for monsters
2) A deposed dhampir lord magus with a whip made from his brother's flayed skin
3) a chaotic evil rogue trying to secretly raise a group of brigands to power
4) a young female witch with a cackle based build, known for refusing to bathe
5) a warforged front line fighter with an erased memory who aspires to join a lawful good order
6) A heal build cleric of the god of the sun
I am making a list of one liners to give during the different phases. so far I have:
1) Ah Bastion the warforged, all the strength of a cavalry charge with none of the subtlety
2) after shattering a bow: That's the problem with archery, too many drawbacks
3)I'm not mad, I'm differently sane
4) Moron runs into a spear! What a Prick!
5)Time flies like an arrow, This flies like a (Insert projectile here)
6) Build a man a fire and hes warm for a day, set a man on fire and hes warm for the rest of his life
7)Insane? I'm a libra!
8)Let there Be Blight!!! (Throws bee bag)
9)Don't listen to him, Hes crazy!
10)Take me to your bleeder!
What I am looking for are jokes that fit the party and that is where I am struggling. I am going to try and get under the Dhampirs skin by claiming to have the same backstory but other than him and the warforged I have nothing party specific. Can any of the wittier members help me tailor this encounter or add some jokes you have used? I would appreciate it especially since I am hoping this will be a recurring enemy.