Funniest scourcebook excerpt

[...]

What was the funniest 3.5 scourcebook excerpt you've seen? Mine has to be in HoH, where, on page 136, it teaches me the blasphemy of modern literature and ensures that the next time I see a vampire in media, the word "sociopath" will come up above his head in my mind in bright red letters.

[Lanaya]

Deju Vu is the classic one.

[Lanaya]

Deju Vu is the classic one.

[hamishspence]

I liked the Acidborn Shark description in Dungeonscape.

"The only thing better than a giant pool of acid is a giant pool of acid with a shark in it"

[Vhaidara]

Not a text excerpt, but my cousin and I still chuckle whenever we page past page 85 of the Player's Handbook.
http://www.paperspencils.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/lidda_kaboom_t1.gif
If you don't get it, either you aren't old enough or you aren't thinking in the right direction.

[John Longarrow]

Deju Vu is the classic one.

I seem to remember that one...

But wasn't he one of the resistance in the movie "Top Secret"??

[FidgetySquirrel]

Not a text excerpt, but my cousin and I still chuckle whenever we page past page 85 of the Player's Handbook.
http://www.paperspencils.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/lidda_kaboom_t1.gif
If you don't get it, either you aren't old enough or you aren't thinking in the right direction.Heh, classic.

[Alleran]

I like the BoEF's description of an ooze's love life.

[Vaz]

What was the funniest 3.5 scourcebook excerpt you've seen? Mine has to be in HoH, where, on page 136, it teaches me the blasphemy of modern literature and ensures that the next time I see a vampire in media, the word "sociopath" will come up above his head in my mind in bright red letters.

I too prefer this type of Vampire than the "aristocraft" vampire (I think it's too perfectly apt as well to describe those in power as bloodsucking parasites). If you've ever read any of the Warhammer background, there is a type of Vampire known as the Strigoi who are insane - former aristocrats and forerunners to lead the vampires into power, but internal scheming forced them into the wilderness and destroyed their easy access to human blood, where they turned into scavengers. Consequently, they are pretty much hated by all of the vampire clans, but have now become immense monstrosities packed with muscle and deformed with wings and beastlike faces, leading packs of ghouls.

And bear in mind that in warhammer, not just "anyone" can become a Vampire - a Vampire can select only a certain few to become its progeny so it chooses the best and brightest of its generation.

[Telonius]

Not a sourcebook, but the article on Dead Levels (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/cwc/20061013a) always makes me chuckle:


Players always have something to look forward to with the monk, which boasts the most colorful and unique special abilities of all the character classes.

[Bakkan]

Similarly, the following quote from the Dungeon Master's Guide just makes me shake my head:


The classes of the D&D game are balanced at levels 1st through 20th, but simply continuing the power escalation of each class beyond 20th level would eventually unbalance the game system.

[Vhaidara]

To be fair, once Epic Spellcasting comes in, the vague, tortured semblance of balance that exists 1-20 gets taken into a back alley and never comes out.

[Brookshw]

Similarly, the following quote from the Dungeon Master's Guide just makes me shake my head:

Kinda reminds me of another from that book

If a spell is so good that you can't imagine a caster not wanting it all the time, it's either too powerful or too low in level

[Zweisteine]

It's not 3.5, or even a proper sourcebook, but the disclaimer on the front of the Basic Rules (http://www.wizards.com/dnd/Article.aspx?x=dnd/basicrules) for 5e is great.


Disclaimer: Wizards of the Coast is not responsible for the consequences of splitting up the party, sticking appendages in the mouth of a leering green devil face, accepting a dinner invitation from bugbears, storming the feast hall of a hill giant steading, angering a dragon of any variety, or saying yes when the DM asks, “Are you really sure?”

[Socksy]

Complete Psionic tells us that when we select an Elemental Steward, it has to match the energy type used in our Privileged Energy teat. I spent a good while giggling over privileged energy boobies.

[Snowbluff]

Similarly, the following quote from the Dungeon Master's Guide just makes me shake my head:


To be fair, once Epic Spellcasting comes in, the vague, tortured semblance of balance that exists 1-20 gets taken into a back alley and never comes out.

In a similiar vein, Monk's dead levels are pretty good.

MONK

The monk is the only other core class, aside from the barbarian, that has no dead levels. Players always have something to look forward to with the monk, which boasts the most colorful and unique special abilities of all the character classes.

Also, I thoroughly enjoy Lidda... :smallamused:
but here's another good one.
http://i.imgur.com/S8XqG.jpg
No one beats pimp!Krusk.

[Irk]

Not a text excerpt, but my cousin and I still chuckle whenever we page past page 85 of the Player's Handbook.
http://www.paperspencils.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/lidda_kaboom_t1.gif
If you don't get it, either you aren't old enough or you aren't thinking in the right direction.
I have flipped past this hundreds of times and never noticed, it's hilarious, also it blew back her hair, I mean, that's pretty powerful.

EDIT: Somewhere there is an excerpt describing a situation in which a mount is more intelligent than the rider.

[Chester]

This, regarding the Pale Master in Libris Mortis

"At 6th level, a pale master gives in to terrible necrophiliac urges."

:eek:

[Blackhawk748]

Arms and Equipment guides description of Thudruk "It smells and tastes like a rotting cow that caught fire" Consequently i once had a character who ONLY drank Thudruk and would complain loudly when a bar didnt have it, everyone thought he was crazy. And no, he wasnt a goblin.

[Sian]

Baffling Defense in Tome of Battle


You crouch balanced on one foot, hands held high over your head. Your foe hesitates, unsure of how to attack you in this unlikely stance.

[Starbuck_II]

Baffling Defense in Tome of Battle
To be fair, I can't personally crouch while balancing on one foot with both hands over my head. So I think they are right about this being an unlikely stance.

I mean, who can do that?

[Brookshw]

To be fair, I can't personally crouch while balancing on one foot with both hands over my head. So I think they are right about this being an unlikely stance.

I mean, who can do that?

It's actually not that hard if you have some experience with certain martial arts or yoga.

[Vhaidara]

It's actually not that hard if you have some experience with certain martial arts or yoga.

Replace "can do" in starbuck's comment with "does".

"Who does that (in combat)?"

[Zombulian]

Baffling Defense in Tome of Battle

It's actually a fairly useful technique used by fighters. Heck, even leading with your right while boxing can throw people off.

[ArqArturo]

This, regarding the Pale Master in Libris Mortis

"At 6th level, a pale master gives in to terrible necrophiliac urges."

:eek:

Well, it does ask you to be 24 hours entombed with nothing but dead/undead corpses.

[Necroticplague]

It's actually a fairly useful technique used by fighters. Heck, even leading with your right while boxing can throw people off. The idea reminds me of a video I saw long ago. Was some kind of MA tournament. Start of the round, the dude appears to do some small version of the dance to Gangam Style. The other dude drops his guards, and looks very confused. Then he gets completely sucker-punched.

[Sith_Happens]

Baffling Defense in Tome of Battle

Wait a second... THAT'S A KARATE KID REFERENCE.

http://www.universityobserver.ie/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/karate_kid_1984_2.jpg

[hamishspence]

EDIT: Somewhere there is an excerpt describing a situation in which a mount is more intelligent than the rider.

Arms & Equipment Guide:

When Your Mount Is Smarter than You
A 5th level paladin has Intelligence 5. Though she is brave and honorable, her warhorse is smarter than she is. How embarrassing. What will the other warhorses think?

[jiriku]

Deju Vu is the classic one.


Deju Vu is the classic one.

I see what you did there.


Wait a second... THAT'S A KARATE KID REFERENCE.

Heh. Someone finally got it.



The funniest thing in any D&D sourcebook is in the DMG, page 235, the rod of lordly might. Read the description aloud, keeping in mind that the the magic rod is a substitute for a fighter who (ahem) thinks his... existing weapon... is inferior. It is important to read it aloud. Every time I play with a new group I do this, and I have the entire group literally falling out of their chairs with laughter. Go ahead. I'll wait. You shouldn't miss out.

[Chaosvii7]

Here's one I just found from Unearthed Arcana.


A tainted warrior of 3rd level or higher can infuse a melee attack with the power of his taint.

[RedMage125]

Well, there's the plethora of editing errors in the Complete Divine, such as citing Tharizdun's favored weapon as a "check toee"
[spoiler]For those who don't get it, TOEE is Temple of Elemental Evil, the most famous adventure to feature the cult of Tharizdun. it was clearly a not for one of the writers to check that adventure and get back to writing, which he never did. I've hear it said that the "check toee" is a simple weapon that does 1d4 damage, with an additional 5d12 damage against any creature with the [editor] subtype.
Also, if anyone cares, tharizdun's favored weapon is the dagger[/spolier]

But in the DMG, page 128, under Random NPC Traits:
trait #100 says "No sense of humor (see number 26)"

There is no number 26.

[DevilsAttorney]

A tainted warrior of 3rd level or higher can infuse a melee attack with the power of his taint.

Man, you gotta wash that...

[ArqArturo]

Man, you gotta wash that...

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UMnDz39H7QU/UuTkQZvXQfI/AAAAAAAAApA/ZHLui5Q70vI/s1600/keep-calm-and-praise-papa-nurgle.png

[Nilehus]

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-UMnDz39H7QU/UuTkQZvXQfI/AAAAAAAAApA/ZHLui5Q70vI/s1600/keep-calm-and-praise-papa-nurgle.png

Mother of Orcus.

We're talking 8d6 acid damage, here. :smalleek:

[gorfnab]

Lords of Madness


A beholder’s favorite foods include small live mammals, exotic mushrooms and other fungi, gnomes, beef, pork, colorful leafy vegetables, leaves, flower petals, insects, and birds.

[hamishspence]

One from 3.0 Manual of the Planes:

"Travellers might sprout eyes on their palms, relive a hundred childhoods simultaneously wherein their parents were secretly Far Realm wights, or backward speaking begin."

[Cowardly Griffo]

"Who does that (in combat)?"The Ginyu Force.

[Milo v3]

My favourite:

Examples could include flying fish, arboreal octopi, sharks that wriggle up on the beach after prey, and the like. They might be relatively harmless (the tree-climbing octopus might be after coconuts and only occasionally try to crack a character’s head by mistake) or perilous in the extreme (for example, a flying piranha swarm)

[Chester]

Well, it does ask you to be 24 hours entombed with nothing but dead/undead corpses.


Yes. The book is rather vague about what actually goes on down there.

[Alex12]

There's a ton of great lines from Ponyfinder, but here are a couple of my favorites.
"Ponies as Gunslingers: This is a troubling combination."
"Reloading any firearm, especially with pellets and powder, is a long, arduous, task for most ponies, to say nothing of the fact that gunpowder does not taste good."

[ArqArturo]

Yes. The book is rather vague about what actually goes on down there.

Maybe this (http://youtu.be/YCTgcZ6ImsQ)?.

[137beth]

If it counts by virtue of being a parody of 3.5 using the OGL, Steve Jackson's Munchkin RPG would have a lot of my favorite quotes. There's the intro to the chapter on cheats feats...

In pathfinder my favorite example of unintentional irony comes from a section in Ultimate Magic about designing spells. (http://paizo.com/pathfinderRPG/prd/ultimateMagic/magic/designingSpells.html) It lists a few "benchmark" spells of each level which are supposedly the 'best' spells that you should compare new spells to. Under 3rd level...

Fireball: ...Gaining this spell changes the paradigm of the game, allowing spellcasters to deal a large amount of damage to multiple targets anywhere they can see.
Changes the paradigm of the game? All it does is give higher numbers to what you could already do. If anything at 3rd level changes the paradigm of the game, it's the very next 'benchmark' spell, Fly.

Pure 3.5 though I am going to have to go with

The reputation of a samurai for being tenacious in battle often precedes them, and their mere presence is often enough to make dishonorable enemies slink away...
...samurai are as potent in melee as a fighter, although they are less versatile.
Even the introductory text doesn't try to pretend that the samurai isn't worse than a fighter:smalltongue:

[ArqArturo]

Even the introductory text doesn't try to pretend that the samurai isn't worse than a fighter:smalltongue:

I try to think if a gestalt Samurai/Fighter is better or worse than any of them as pure classes.

[The Viscount]

If we're speaking of funny excerpts there's always the classics

The PHB has a line about concealment preventing attacks, as when the attacker is "in a dog."

On the Admiral's Coat from Stormwrack

Threat the coast as a shirt or vestment.
Try to not picture some madman yelling "I'M A SHIRT" at the cliffs.

One of my favorites for this is the PrC Ghost-Faced Killer. Everybody loves Wu Tang Clan!

[ArqArturo]

One of my favorites for this is the PrC Ghost-Faced Killer. Everybody loves Wu Tang Clan!

Now everyone thinks I'm nuts because I laughed like an idiot :p.

[Necroticplague]

If we're speaking of funny excerpts there's always the classics

The PHB has a line about concealment preventing attacks, as when the attacker is "in a dog."

"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."

-Groucho Marx

[Zaq]

I love the example of the Shugenja's Sense Elements ability, from Complete Divine. I don't have it in front of me right now, but it basically all but admits that it's both too slow and too limited to actually do anything useful.

[Karnith]

I love the example of the Shugenja's Sense Elements ability, from Complete Divine. I don't have it in front of me right now, but it basically all but admits that it's both too slow and too limited to actually do anything useful.
The example in question:

For example, Kitsu Mari enters a room and concentrates to sense water. (Although he is a water shugenja, he could just as easily sense any other element, including fire.) He becomes aware of all sources of water within 10 feet. A basin of water rests on the nightstand, a person lurks behind the door (living creatures are usually made of all four elements) holding a vial of poison - Kitsu Mari discovers three sources of water within 10 feet of him: one Medium, one Small, and one Fine. Focusing on the Medium source and concentrating for a round, he makes a Spellcraft check and gets a result of 31. He learns that the Medium source of water is a creature, that it is natural, and where it is. If the assassin behind the door has not already jumped out to attack him, he has learned that a creature is hiding behind the door... but more likely, he has learned this too late.

Also, it's not really a big excerpt or anything, but I love that Lidda's last name is Tosscobble.

[atomicwaffle]

Book of Erotic Fantasy

The Whole. Damn. Book.

But if i had to pick one part, it would be the chapter (yes, chapter) on STD's. One of them is called Crotch Plague.

[Amphetryon]

Did I miss the reference prior to this point to the glory that is "check ToEE"?

[...]

Another one I forgot: Some of the ways to get ambrosia in BoED are creepier than others. "Don't mind me, guys, just getting some ambrosia. That's really hot, by the way."

[ArqArturo]

Another one I forgot: Some of the ways to get ambrosia in BoED are creepier than others. "Don't mind me, guys, just getting some ambrosia. That's really hot, by the way."

That's not ambrosia :smallamused:.

[Venger]

the numerous occurences of pppppppqqqqqqqq in both "heroes of battle" and "complete champion" alongside textthatisallruntogetherwithnospaceslikethis is rib-crushingly hilarious.

foe hunter in "masters of the wild" is at one point mistakenly called "toe hunter" unfortunately, it's where the class's features are described for the first time.

[...]

The mysterious floating beholder organs in LoM.

[deuxhero]

foe hunter in "masters of the wild" is at one point mistakenly called "toe hunter" unfortunately, it's where the class's features are described for the first time.

Maybe they hunt or hunt with check toees?

[Cowardly Griffo]

The description of Alchemist's Fire in the PRD includes this gem:
Leaping into a lake or magically extinguishing the flames automatically smothers the fire.

It has to be a lake specifically, you see. Rivers just don't work.

[Dr. Cliché]

It has to be a lake specifically, you see. Rivers just don't work.

And leaping into an ocean only makes things worse...

[animewatcha]

Does Pathfinder have an elemental plane of water?

[Cowardly Griffo]

As a matter of fact, it seems it does. (http://pathfinder.wikia.com/wiki/Plane_of_Water) :smallcool:

[Socksy]

Also, it's not really a big excerpt or anything, but I love that Lidda's last name is Tosscobble.

The only good thing coming out of the Truenaming section of Tome of Magic

[Shieldbunny]

Arms & Equipment Guide:

When Your Mount Is Smarter than You
A 5th level paladin has Intelligence 5. Though she is brave and honorable, her warhorse is smarter than she is. How embarrassing. What will the other warhorses think?

+1 to this. My absolute favorite sidebar.

[hamishspence]

The centaur section in Races of Faerun has a few moments:

Human legend has it that the centaurs are the result of some mad cross between a wild elf and a wild mustang, but both the wild elves and the centaurs take umbrage at this suggestion (The mustangs have no particular opinions on the matter.)

also:

Noncentaurs should note that although centaurs have generally wonderful senses of humor, they are sensitive about their physiology. They take direct offense at any horse jokes. ("The horses don't tell us human jokes, you know. Nor do they ask if they can climb on our backs!")

[Cowardly Griffo]

Third party, but Bastards and Bloodlines had this gem regarding Blinklings, which are half halfling and half Blink Dog:


Supposedly, blinklings originated when a powerful halfling druid asked her goddess for assistance against an invasion of trolls. According to this legend, the deity merged a local pack of blink dogs with the druid's halfling allies to create a group of warriors who could move quickly and quietly through the forest and avoid the trolls' heavy blows. Though members of other races scoff and make disparaging remarks about blinkling origins they consider more likely...

I like it when a publisher acknowledges how silly their thing is. Also I'm just going to say the punchline "Riding Dog" and let you make the lead-up yourselves, guys. :smallcool:

[ArqArturo]

The whole Description of 3.0 Psionic Combat is tragically hilarious.

[Curmudgeon]

Player's Handbook, page 37:
Characteristics: Of all classes, fighters have the best all-around fighting capabilities (hence the name).

[...]

Third party, but Bastards and Bloodlines had this gem regarding Blinklings, which are half halfling and half Blink Dog:



I like it when a publisher acknowledges how silly their thing is. Also I'm just going to say the punchline "Riding Dog" and let you make the lead-up yourselves, guys. :smallcool:

Reminds me of the "Glorified Brothels" quote in BoED.

[Nilehus]

Player's Handbook, page 37:

... That was incredibly harsh, and I cannot stop laughing. Well played. :smallbiggrin:

[toapat]

Player's Handbook, page 37:

Complete warrior beats that though

[Cowardly Griffo]

Player's Handbook, page 37:Wasn't that, like, true at the time though? Before they came out with like fifteen thousand splatbooks that made it look bad by comparison?

[Anlashok]

Wasn't that, like, true at the time though? Before they came out with like fifteen thousand splatbooks that made it look bad by comparison?

Druid, Cleric and Barbarian were in the same book.

[Curmudgeon]

Druid, Cleric and Barbarian were in the same book.
Druid plus Natural Spell, and Cleric plus War domain plus Divine Power: both classes with ways to have fighting prowess yet without sacrificing any spellcasting ability.

[SimonMoon6]

Dawizard and Iwizard.

Honestly, when I first encountered those words, I wondered what I was missing. If a character takes 3d6 points of dawizard, what does that mean? Is dawizard some strange resource that was described in some obscure source book that I don't have access to?

It took something like 24 hours before I realized that "search and replace" had turned the word "mage" into the word "wizard".

[Necroticplague]

Wasn't that, like, true at the time though? Before they came out with like fifteen thousand splatbooks that made it look bad by comparison?

No, because most the stuff that lets druids and wizards and clerics trump the fighter is in the same book as that quote.

[...]

Dawizard and Iwizard.

Honestly, when I first encountered those words, I wondered what I was missing. If a character takes 3d6 points of dawizard, what does that mean? Is dawizard some strange resource that was described in some obscure source book that I don't have access to?

It took something like 24 hours before I realized that "search and replace" had turned the word "mage" into the word "wizard".

That made me laugh so hard.

[Cowardly Griffo]

Re: Whatevers vs. Fighters.
Eh. Don't agree at all, but don't care enough to derail the thread over it. :smalltongue:

[Yora]

Deju Vu is the classic one.

Yeah, that one is classic. Totally fell for it when reading the powers section.

[137beth]

Complete warrior beats that though

Specifically the part about how awesome samurai are:smalltongue:


The centaur section in Races of Faerun has a few moments:

Human legend has it that the centaurs are the result of some mad cross between a wild elf and a wild mustang, but both the wild elves and the centaurs take umbrage at this suggestion (The mustangs have no particular opinions on the matter.)
I don't have races of Faerun, but when I read your post I initially read that word as "Umbridge". Which would sort of make sense, except that it is a completely different franchise.

[georgie_leech]

Specifically the part about how awesome samurai are:smalltongue:


I don't have races of Faerun, but when I read your post I initially read that word as "Umbridge". Which would sort of make sense, except that it is a completely different franchise.

Most people take umbrage at Umbridge.

[hamishspence]

Most people take umbrage at Umbridge.

:smallbiggrin:

PHB2 Rogue quote:

"Where's the evil plan? Come on, you've got to have an evil plan! How can you call yourself a crazed cultist if you don't have an evil plan?"

[Shieldbunny]

I like the contrast between the quotes starting chapter one of Libris Mortis.


"What lies at the end of a life well lived? Eons of cold servitude, your flesh but a memory, your every tortured thought focused on one thing only; to feed on the living."

-Acadecian Drake
Bleak Academy Necromancer

"...uhhhnnsss..."

-Nameless zombie

[Socksy]

Dawizard and Iwizard.

Honestly, when I first encountered those words, I wondered what I was missing. If a character takes 3d6 points of dawizard, what does that mean? Is dawizard some strange resource that was described in some obscure source book that I don't have access to?

It took something like 24 hours before I realized that "search and replace" had turned the word "mage" into the word "wizard".

Stumbled onto an article about the daWizard incident online, and laughed for hours.
Linked it to some friends, and we decided iWizard was clearly some sort of copyrighted Apple product stolen by WotC.

[The Viscount]

Another great one for this is Justice of Weald and Woe, which is an odd and very involved pun based on the archaic contrast of weal and woe (fortune and misfortune, as they appear in augury) and weald, an archaic word meaning forested area. I bet only a tiny fraction of people got this the first time. I certainly wasn't one of them.

[*.*.*.*]

PHB2 Barbarian section: BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!

[Deadline]

I'm rather fond of the dozen or so little errors (or are they intentional?) that gave rise to Pelor, the Burning Hate.

[ArqArturo]

A couple of descriptions of the Flail Snail in Pathfinder:

Flail snails are intelligent gastropods that subsist on fungus, mold, and vermin, though they may attack larger creatures in self-defense. Known for their magic-warping shells, flail snails roam slowly through subterranean caverns writing great epics in their slime trails.

A typical human who managed to communicate with a flail snail might well find the conversation dull, with the snail viewing every thought and detail as separate and unrelated from the others. Yet those monks or other scholars used to such things might recognize in the snail’s koan-like observations a certain Zen poetry hinting at deeper revelations—and indeed, if enlightenment is judged by perfect calm and inherent peace of mind, then the meditative flail snail may yet have the advantage over humanity. Certainly their lives are more pastoral, free from war and the other “advances” of civilization...

...Every flail snail has its own unique chemical signature that makes its slime trail immediately recognizable to other snails. Within its trail, each snail records a running dialogue of its thoughts, observations, and memories in a complex interaction of scents that can linger on the stone long after the slime has dried to dust. Other snails can read this dense stream of information and edit it with their own trails, creating a vast, interwoven cultural narrative that at once contains the snails’ greatest art and the sum of their collective history. Together, the slime trails of two dozen snails weave epic tales worthy of any philosopher-poet.

Flail Snail Bards!.

[Optimator]

Round 4: Eat Brains.

[ezkajii]

Here's one I just found from Unearthed Arcana.

Seconded, plus basically all of the taint-based monsters from Heroes of Horrors. Taint elementals; i remember a creature that can 'exhale a cloud of choking taint'.

[Cowardly Griffo]

Fling Ally from Races of Stone's prerequisites include "Rock Hurling or racial ability to throw rocks."

Racial ability to throw rocks. I'm pretty sure that's the verbal component to a feeblemind spell I just cast on myself by reading that.

[Vhaidara]

Fling Ally from Races of Stone's prerequisites include "Rock Hurling or racial ability to throw rocks."

Racial ability to throw rocks. I'm pretty sure that's the verbal component to a feeblemind spell I just cast on myself by reading that.

Giants have Rock Throwing as a racial trait. That's what it's referring to. Badly, but it is a thing.

[deuxhero]

Some of the larger or rarer creatures, such as whales, are obviously much more difficult to find on the open market, and may only be available in seedy underground bazaars

I know it's supposed to mean METAPHORICALLY underground but...

[Milo v3]

I know it's supposed to mean METAPHORICALLY underground but...

There are space whales and magma whales, cave whales aren't exactly hard to imagine in D&D :smalltongue:

[jedipilot24]

The Examples of Play using the iconics to demonstrate some rule or set of rules, or to show the theme of the book.
It's just totally unlike real gameplay.

[A Tad Insane]

The first two paragraphs of the chaos beast's combat section are fairly amusing.

How many attacks can a creature who can assume any form have? In this case, only two.