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View Full Version : TPAY/TPBY Kiss or Kill XCIII: *makes new thread*



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copycatcat
2014-09-28, 11:21 AM
*sighs*
Just because Targ
*cannot be destroyed in any way whatsoever that can be done with epic spells, which would target his silly light plane if they had to, and he took the magic away from me somehow, doesn't mean I lose my custom-made gauntlets of every protection in the MiC and SRD! Which include protection from rocks.
*is glad about how Targ's thingy doesn't end active spells*
*makes enslaved epic wizard do the Zodar-shapechange thing for me*
*gets +infinity Cha cloak, it is custom*
*tells epic wizard to shapechange back*
*uses infinite Diplomacy to make Targ, Zaydos, and Drakeburn be fanatic*
*comes to the auditions in no costume*

Twelvetrees
2014-09-28, 11:53 AM
*Calmly walks over and steals gauntlets*
*Gets targeted by enslave spell, steals spell and is unaffected*
*Sneak Attack*

"I'm from 5th edition. 3.5 immunity won't protect you from me."

*Collects bounty*

Orm-Embar
2014-09-28, 12:40 PM
*picks pocketses*

SpeedWitch
2014-09-28, 12:43 PM
*knocks out*

*steals gauntlets and bounty* Ninjas!

*time travels through TPBM's history and causes shenanigans*

TheCountAlucard
2014-09-28, 12:52 PM
(casts in the new Batman movie)

(politely requests Targ and copycatcat please take their epic-level "no ya didn't," "yes I did" shenanigans off-thread)

Targ Collective
2014-09-28, 01:59 PM
Agreed. If copycatcat agrees.

BasketOfPuppies
2014-09-28, 02:58 PM
*readies action to ninja TPBM*

Zaydos
2014-09-28, 03:05 PM
*grabs the ninja*

Excellent every party needs a rogue. How good are you at finding traps? Well your first adventure is exploring the Ant Hive of Lorne, don't worry plenty of traps in there, don't know why a giant ant hive has poison arrow traps and even fireball traps, but they do. Don't worry I'm sure you're enough of a ninja to find them.

@v: Wait, giant ant size or normal ant size?

Orm-Embar
2014-09-28, 03:15 PM
*Shrinks Zaydos to ant size*

*releases into ant hive*

*remembers to disguise him as an ant for his own good*

copycatcat
2014-09-28, 03:58 PM
yeah, sure

*shoots with marshmallow gun of charm person*

Drakeburn
2014-09-28, 05:32 PM
*commands my new pet dragons to guard me*

Let's see you try to harm me now! :smalltongue:

Zaydos
2014-09-28, 05:35 PM
*crawls onto while the size of an ant, much too small for his pet dragon to notice*

*crawls inside brain via the ear canal*

*takes control from within*

*commits many crimes while in Drakeburn's body*

*quadruples bounty on me*

TheCountAlucard
2014-09-28, 05:42 PM
(restores you to dragon size)

That's a heck of a mess you made, Zaydos.

Strategos
2014-09-28, 06:30 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**gives a steam-powered motorcycle to**

@ v "Hey! Please be careful! Those aren't just a pair of gears. Wilhelm there's a Klink (http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Klink)"

copycatcat
2014-09-28, 06:34 PM
*steals gears from*

BasketOfPuppies
2014-09-28, 07:51 PM
*throws a wrench inside Wilhelm*

PurityIcekiller
2014-09-28, 08:24 PM
*throws a wench inside your basket*

Zaydos
2014-09-28, 08:35 PM
*bursts out of basket grabbing puppies and ponies*

*points*

Adventure! That way! Go! Now!

@v: :smalleek: My peanut butter recipes! What you thought I had relevant charts and tables on there?

Drakeburn
2014-09-28, 09:02 PM
*steals the DM screen*

NOW I AM THE ALMIGHTY DUNGEON MASTER!!! GO FORTH MORTALS, AND FULFILL YOUR DESTINY! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

BasketOfPuppies
2014-09-28, 09:53 PM
*goes third*

*tries again*

*goes fifth*

SpeedWitch
2014-09-28, 10:07 PM
*begins to sell you away one-by-one on the streets*

Zaydos
2014-09-28, 10:40 PM
*buys all of puppies under various disguises such as Zyasod the Psionic Dragon, Sodyaz the Dragon Fool, Zaydos the Brass Dragon Video Gamer, Zaydos the Bronze Dragon Paladin, and Zaydos the undead peanut... all of which are obviously different people*

*puts all the puppies in a basket*

*apologizes for the evil anubite's attempts to separate them even evil has its standards usually*

Mercenary Pen
2014-09-29, 07:14 AM
*sends in a Mega Mawile to face you*

Sorrcerousflux
2014-09-29, 07:29 AM
*becomes pacifist*

*gives dragon kiss*

Drakeburn
2014-09-29, 10:52 AM
*gives Sorrcerousflux my two dragons*

I have some errands to run, so I need somebody to babysit my pets for me.

Be careful of the fiery one though, he's got quite a temper.

*goes to the grocery store*

SpeedWitch
2014-09-29, 02:41 PM
*kidnaps and drags you away to Mordor*

@V Eeeeehehehe, EEEEEEHEHEHE, EEEEE-What have you done to meeeEEEEEEE?!?!?

copycatcat
2014-09-29, 03:44 PM
*Casts hideous laughter on*

Strategos
2014-09-29, 07:11 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**tells the funniest joke in the world to**

Targ Collective
2014-09-29, 07:40 PM
What? You mean the Killer Joke? That's a bit mean for you Strategos...

*Arranges a civilised breakfast for everyone, being sure to include coffee for EmeraldRose*

Drakeburn
2014-09-29, 07:56 PM
*gives you the peanut butter recipes I took from Zaydos*

I'm sure you'll need these for lunch.

Orm-Embar
2014-09-29, 08:10 PM
*Brings the ants to the picnic, gives them a plate of cake for their own*

copycatcat
2014-09-29, 08:22 PM
*steals coffee*
*casts speak with animals*
*strikes up conversation with ants*

Haruki-kun
2014-09-29, 08:29 PM
*joins conversation*

*makes obvious joke about this being a conversation FOR ANTS?*

SpeedWitch
2014-09-29, 09:27 PM
*invites everyone's aunts to the thread for a get-together*

EmeraldRose
2014-09-30, 09:20 AM
*puts into an omelet*

V: Hmmm.....how many are we talking about here?

Yeah sure, I can carry two. Will they cook for me on the trip?

TheCountAlucard
2014-09-30, 09:21 AM
(asks if you'd mind taking some hobbits to Isengard)

Just two, I think - might be more later, though.

I think the only food they've got is that weird elvish biscuit. Probably not much they can do meal-wise.

Drakeburn
2014-09-30, 09:34 AM
YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!

*destroys stone bridge*

*said destroyed bridge falls on top of TPBM*

Oops. Sorry about that!

Zaydos
2014-09-30, 09:53 AM
*contemplates rising up*

*instead tips off the cops at Drakeburn's current position and adds destruction of public property to his list of offenses*

Orm-Embar
2014-09-30, 10:34 AM
*throws the book at you*

TheCountAlucard
2014-09-30, 10:47 AM
(throws the book to you - underhanded, even!)

EmeraldRose
2014-09-30, 10:49 AM
*catches the book and reads a bedtime story to the thread*

SpeedWitch
2014-09-30, 11:37 AM
*tries to stay awake and hear the whole thing*

*fails*

*dreams of demons and shades from the underworld who exit the mental plane and begin to wage war on the thread*

Drakeburn
2014-09-30, 08:56 PM
*floods the thread*

Well, this wouldn't have happened if anybody had given me a cork.

Well, either get busy swimming or get busy dying.

*holds breath*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-01, 06:09 AM
(not needing to breathe, it just becomes a matter of swimming to the bottom of the thread and pulling the drain-plug)

Problem solved.

EmeraldRose
2014-10-01, 11:14 AM
*gives a spoon*

Will this help?

Orm-Embar
2014-10-01, 11:58 AM
*takes spoon from TheCountAlucard, stirs coffee*

Thanks, that did in fact help.

*sends you aloft in hot air balloon*

Castaras
2014-10-01, 01:00 PM
* gives pie *
...containing live red fire ants

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-01, 01:31 PM
*hosts the First Annual Kiss or Kill Pie-Eating Contest*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-01, 03:53 PM
*kisses a pie*

*kills TPBM's pie*

*eats eats every other pie*

*calculates the square root of pi*

*Head implodes, gets shamed by Anubis in the afterlife and sent back to the land of the living to clean some bathrooms*

Drakeburn
2014-10-02, 09:53 AM
MY PIE!!! NO!!!!

*gives a moment of silence to my chocolate cream pie*

............. PIE FIGHT!!!!

*throws random pies at TPAM and TPBM*

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-02, 11:16 AM
* gets pied*

*plays in pie, making mess on carpet*

@V: yes, why?

EmeraldRose
2014-10-02, 01:41 PM
*asks*

Hey do you hang out at the Enemy Agency comic?

*gives treats to the puppies*

^ Just thought I recognized some puppies I saw over there. :smallwink:

V: Lovely! *reads*

Strategos
2014-10-02, 03:29 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**gives a copy of Hounds of the Baskervilles to**

Targ Collective
2014-10-03, 01:55 AM
*Gives exactly 99 Master Balls to*

*Says, "It's okay, I've got contacts with Sylph Co."*

Sorrcerousflux
2014-10-03, 09:24 AM
Sylph co.?

*kills*

*dances*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-03, 09:57 AM
*turns parts of the dance floor to lava*

*orders the orchestra to play something fast-paced*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-03, 10:23 AM
(flings a twice-folded paper napkin, splitting your skull to the teeth)

SpeedWitch
2014-10-03, 11:09 AM
*kneels and respectfully asks to learn the ancient art of origami from you*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-03, 11:12 AM
*shows how to make spitballs*

Here ya go!

Dudeons
2014-10-03, 01:32 PM
*uses dragon as a jump rope*

Strategos
2014-10-03, 06:32 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**challenges to a high-stakes game of hopscotch**

Zaydos
2014-10-03, 08:10 PM
*referees the game*

*dons referee "sunglasses"*

*pretends that he can see through the obsidian*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-03, 09:12 PM
*makes faces at you*

*rolls a dozen natural 20s, saves them for later*

*gives you offerings of rum and cigars*

Drakeburn
2014-10-03, 10:25 PM
*steals all your rum and cigars*

*hides the stolen goods in TPBM's post*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-04, 10:08 AM
*slurps affectionately*

*skadoodles on out with all that rum and cigars*
PROFIT

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-04, 01:53 PM
Good thing she missed my Scotch.

*pours himself a glass*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-04, 03:16 PM
(reveals that your drink is actually Scotch tape)

Drakeburn
2014-10-04, 03:31 PM
*super-glues the whole thread, and everyone in it*

Muahahahaha!!!!!

*super-glues the hole in the boat*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-04, 05:55 PM
*wishes your superglue away to the cornfield*

*hands you a big shiny new roll of duct tape*

copycatcat
2014-10-04, 10:39 PM
*Polymorph Any Objects the tape into a new hat*
*wears hat*
*removes hat*
*hands to spawn*
Here, go enchant this.

SpeedWitch
2014-10-05, 12:21 PM
*snatches the hat and begins the quest of stealing every hat in the thread*

Drakeburn
2014-10-05, 02:36 PM
*plants dynamite in the thread*

FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!

*lights the fuse*

Laughing Dog
2014-10-05, 02:51 PM
*plugs the hole in your boat with a peg made from pure sodium*
*Greater Teleports away*
*disembowels Targ Collective*

Wait, what am I going to do with these intestines?

*re-embowels Targ Collective*

Strategos
2014-10-05, 05:49 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**gives a Slowpoke egg to**

SpeedWitch
2014-10-06, 01:43 AM
*carefully places a King's Rock on top of the egg*

*tucks into bed*

*begins reading a bedtime story to the egg*

"Once upon a time, in the magical Kiss or Kill thread..."

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-06, 09:52 AM
*scritches behind ears*

Drakeburn
2014-10-06, 01:22 PM
*abandons my sinking boat*

*swims over to TPBM*

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-06, 01:52 PM
*plugs hole in boat*

*uses as basket*

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-06, 02:31 PM
*replaces boat with actual basket*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-06, 03:19 PM
*swiftly attaches numerous helium balloons to basket*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-06, 04:52 PM
(appoints you as Protector of the Puppies for their high-flying adventure)

Strategos
2014-10-06, 06:31 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**awards you an honorary professorship**

EmeraldRose
2014-10-06, 06:41 PM
*hugs and gives tea and cakes*

B-Man
2014-10-06, 06:58 PM
* cup of coffee *

Drakeburn
2014-10-06, 07:00 PM
*Mud-Slaps B-man and the coffee*

It is super effective!

*Gains 5 exp*

Strategos
2014-10-06, 09:20 PM
**pushes overboard**
**sends out Sharpedo**
"I suggest you start swimming now; before Corleone notices you."

SpeedWitch
2014-10-06, 10:14 PM
*summons a tornado*

*accidentally creates Sharpnado*

*shrugs and pulls out a video camera*

Laughing Dog
2014-10-06, 10:16 PM
*drops a tree on*
*drops the rest of the forest upon*

Drakeburn
2014-10-06, 11:14 PM
*sets the trees on fire*

*gets out the sticks and marshmallows*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-07, 08:43 AM
*provides chocolate and graham crackers*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-07, 09:15 AM
*sends in a marching band*

*releases wolves*

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-07, 10:56 AM
*feeds the wolves steaks*

*plays with the now friendly wolves*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-07, 03:23 PM
*puts flyers all over the thread advertising a rodeo*

*begins to put saddles on the wolves*

*forces TPBM to ride the largest of the wolves that didn't get steak*

Drakeburn
2014-10-07, 03:56 PM
*gets on the largest wolf*

*sets it on fire*

*rides it towards TPBM*

READY OR NOT! HERE I COME! :smallamused:

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-07, 09:39 PM
*runs in 4 separate directions, confusing the wolf*

*accidentally runs into TPBM's leg*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-07, 10:37 PM
Oh, is it feeding time already?

(pours you some kibbles in four little bowls, then takes for a walk)

Strategos
2014-10-09, 08:20 AM
**places a red Power Rangers helmet on your head**

EmeraldRose
2014-10-09, 08:25 AM
*hugs and gives coffee*

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-09, 11:19 AM
*drinks the coffee, then wears the mug as a hat*

Zaydos
2014-10-09, 01:07 PM
*pops out of the mug and points*

That way my mighty steed! Mush!

@v: You think I have a heart? How quaint.

Drakeburn
2014-10-09, 01:59 PM
*drives a Dragonlance into Zaydos' heart*

Honestly, how many "Dragon Slayer" quests do I need to go through?

Orm-Embar
2014-10-09, 02:49 PM
*Gives you comic books to read, good ones*

Strategos
2014-10-10, 05:30 AM
**gives you a life sized statue of yourself carved from obsidian**

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-10, 05:56 AM
*claims statue as own*

This is mine now.

Castaras
2014-10-10, 06:46 AM
* gives pie *
raspberry

EmeraldRose
2014-10-10, 08:04 AM
*gives coffee to go with the pie*
also raspberry

Ninjaman
2014-10-10, 08:47 AM
*Scorches with flamethrower*
"Hey gurl, need some ice? Cuz you're hot!"

Orm-Embar
2014-10-10, 09:01 AM
*hands you a side quest of the amusing kind, or possibly deadly if you answer one question wrong*

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-10, 09:16 AM
*sends a flight of swallows to drop coconuts on your head*

PurityIcekiller
2014-10-10, 02:47 PM
*throws swords at you from a lake*

Zaydos
2014-10-10, 04:32 PM
*rises out of lake*

*offers wish if you can answer me these questions three*

*asks questions in a language not only incomprehensible, but the hearing of which melts brains*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-10, 05:07 PM
Yes, behind the peanut butter, and that's only legal in Idaho.

(demands $20 of)

Dire Moose
2014-10-10, 06:08 PM
*gives gunshots instead*

*takes $20 from corpse*

Drakeburn
2014-10-10, 06:10 PM
*throws TPBM into Zaydos' lake*

copycatcat
2014-10-10, 10:51 PM
*contingent PaO into a pebble*
*throws pebble into lake*

There we go. You'll only be stuck 20 minutes!

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-11, 04:21 AM
*kiss
Because
Old school*

Strategos
2014-10-11, 09:00 AM
**lightly raps across the knuckles with a ruler**
"Now, pay attention. We were learning about the monarchs of England..."

Orm-Embar
2014-10-11, 11:42 AM
*sits in the back row doodling God Save the Queen lyrics onto the desktop in indelible black marker*

*adds a stick figure of you to the graffiti*

CrimsonKnight
2014-10-11, 04:35 PM
*takes a nap as soon as the projector starts running*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-11, 05:10 PM
*draws mustaches on with a permanent marker*

V: http://www.ubuntudeal.co.za/images/blog/205_a284681198ae479fb7e356dbb85e02fd.jpg

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-11, 08:06 PM
(gives your hand a marker moustache as well)

SpeedWitch
2014-10-12, 02:49 AM
*plants your face into the ground and starts a mustache farm*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-12, 09:47 AM
*knocks books off your desk, pretends it was accidental*

Ninjaman
2014-10-12, 10:06 AM
*Pushes into a pool of blue paint.*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-12, 10:52 AM
*ties laces together*

*pushes backwards over Orm-Embar into the pool of paint*

ThePhantom
2014-10-12, 11:02 AM
*throws a rose*

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-12, 04:01 PM
*takes camping*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-12, 06:30 PM
*puts in a box and ships to boot camp*

Laughing Dog
2014-10-12, 07:42 PM
*makes boots out of*

*eats omelet*

*throws away the empty Slowpoke eggshell*

Haruki-kun
2014-10-13, 12:42 AM
*plays cards with*

Ninjaman
2014-10-13, 03:43 AM
*Joins the card game*
*Kills you both with Jeskai Ascendency*

Drakeburn
2014-10-13, 11:33 AM
*places a card with explosive runes onto Ninjaman's cards*

*hilarity ensues*

Strategos
2014-10-13, 05:22 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**attacks directly with the Dark Magician**

SpeedWitch
2014-10-13, 07:22 PM
"AHA! You just activated my trap card!"

*proceeds to read the effect of Mirror Force aloud in a dramatic voice*

copycatcat
2014-10-13, 10:06 PM
*lends Strategos a spellblade of Mirror Force*

What? When you have so many resources, you should always be prepared!

*Keeps other spellblade of Mirror Force and clenches it tightly*

Drakeburn
2014-10-13, 11:02 PM
*knocks a candle over the card game*

*sets all the cards on fire*

*sets all the card players on fire*

Sorry! :smallfrown::smallredface:

Orm-Embar
2014-10-13, 11:40 PM
*Sets you on fire too*

*sprays with fire extinguisher*

Targ Collective
2014-10-14, 04:10 AM
*Seeks out EmeraldRose*

*Offers caramel macchiatio*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-14, 08:26 AM
(dakkas all da filfy humies)

copycatcat
2014-10-14, 08:42 AM
*has dominated minion cast create water*
*pours water on card players*
*casts scorching ray on drakeburn*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-14, 08:45 AM
*taps on the shoulder and asks for a refill of coffee*
V: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! I would share the coffee with you. :smallfrown:

Haruki-kun
2014-10-14, 08:49 AM
*steals coffee* @[email protected]

Drakeburn
2014-10-14, 10:01 AM
*poisons the coffee*

Believe me. You don't wanna know what I put in there.

Orm-Embar
2014-10-14, 11:19 AM
*Rakes up all the leaves, buries you under the leaf pile*

@VV: *settles in for a looong wait*

Ninjaman
2014-10-14, 12:36 PM
*Traps inside pandora's box*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-14, 01:36 PM
*embarks on complicated 2000 year rescue plan to free Orm from the box*

V: Squee!!! *glomps Ruki*

Haruki-kun
2014-10-14, 01:51 PM
*feels bad for coffee-stealing*
*gives more coffee*

copycatcat
2014-10-14, 02:08 PM
*casts Prestidigitation to make your coffee lukewarm*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-14, 05:14 PM
(casts Preston's Indignation at you)

Mercenary Pen
2014-10-14, 06:25 PM
*casts Pesto Inclination upon you"

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-14, 08:06 PM
*casts Pedro's Incineration on you*

@V: is that an RvB reference?

EmeraldRose
2014-10-14, 08:28 PM
*debates the Puma Interpretation with you*

^: Nope, just making something up to continue the running gag. Unless, yes, yes it is....if that's actually something? :smallwink:

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-15, 08:54 AM
*makes a flower crown for*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-15, 09:29 AM
*Makes spider silk armor for, like steel only with magic*

copycatcat
2014-10-15, 09:33 AM
*opens box*
*casts dominate monster on the evil spirits*
*forces them back into the box*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-15, 09:51 AM
(tears your throat out)

EmeraldRose
2014-10-15, 10:02 AM
*fixes it with duck tape*

*creates a duck tape mummy*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-15, 10:58 AM
*lays out the canopic jars and instruments needed for the rest of the mummification process*

*Also builds a pyramid full of ingenious and deadly traps*

copycatcat
2014-10-15, 12:12 PM
*ignores illusion with teared out throat*
*casts Command Undead on Alucard*

Strategos
2014-10-15, 05:36 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**gives the Star of Astoroth to**

SpeedWitch
2014-10-15, 06:40 PM
*gives a free piggyback ride around the pyramids of Egypt*

Mercenary Pen
2014-10-15, 06:58 PM
*invites you to an entirely fictional session of Pyramids and Peregrine-headed deities*

(it was either that or Sand and Sphinxes, and guess which one I liked more)

Zaydos
2014-10-15, 07:01 PM
*points out that pyramids and phoenixes could have worked as classically there was a connection between phoenixes and Egypt*

Drakeburn
2014-10-15, 09:36 PM
*takes photos*

Look out, American tourist coming through! :smalltongue:

Strategos
2014-10-15, 10:15 PM
**places a cowboy hat on your head**
**gives a pair of sunglasses to**

copycatcat
2014-10-15, 10:17 PM
*destroys Klink*

@V: Vampires don't have blood, so I can't be red-handed!

@V2: I destroyed a pair of Klinks, not a human! Besides, what kind of lazy vampire does something like that? When you can cast 9th level spells, you true resurrect yourself victims. Sometimes from those that are already your spawn.

Orm-Embar
2014-10-15, 11:06 PM
*Catches you red-handed ((literally, or maybe only metaphorically, dripping with the blood, or at least red-ish petroleum products - like motor oil or maybe automatic transmission fluid - of your victims, vampire!)) in a restricted area*

*Hands you over to the Antiquities Authority*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-16, 11:32 AM
*pies the authorities and drives off with copycatcat in a getaway car*

Strategos
2014-10-16, 04:41 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**cooks a steak for**

Mercenary Pen
2014-10-16, 05:37 PM
*raises the steaks*


*points out that pyramids and phoenixes could have worked as classically there was a connection between phoenixes and Egypt*

*points out that I have minimal knowledge of egyptian mythological bestiary*

Zaydos
2014-10-16, 05:46 PM
*points out that I have minimal knowledge of egyptian mythological bestiary*

*replies*

As do I ultimately. I just like phoenixes and some of the Greek myths place them in Egypt. There is also an Egyptian creature which might be a phoenix (I forget its name) and I've heard a legend about them immolating themselves in front of Ra's home although I think it's one of the later ones.

Another option was Monuments and Mummies.

copycatcat
2014-10-16, 05:55 PM
*dominate monster*
*crafts contingent spell: dominate monster, when first one wears off*
*repeat up to your HD*

Ninjaman
2014-10-16, 06:10 PM
*Bludgeons with ham*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-16, 06:43 PM
*slaps with green eggs*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-16, 06:46 PM
*turns up nose at*

copycatcat
2014-10-16, 07:06 PM
*kills*
We never did finish that old-school part...

Strategos
2014-10-16, 09:14 PM
**sends to detention**
"You'll be writing 'I will not dominate my classmates' five hundred times. With no magical assistance."

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-16, 09:47 PM
*throws copy of Ethan Frome at*

Zaydos
2014-10-16, 10:34 PM
*forces to perform feats and acts which most certainly could only come in exaggerations and tall tales.*

*forces to jump so high you touch the sky*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-16, 11:02 PM
*films you live in front of hundreds of billions of alien lifeforms across the galaxy*

In other words-

*gives you a chance to do your dance at the Space Jam* Alright alright alright...

Drakeburn
2014-10-16, 11:19 PM
*ties TPAM onto a rocket*

*sets it off, having it aimed straight at Zaydos*

*ties TPBM to another rocket*

*launches it towards Cancun Mexico*

One of the finest vacation spots ever!

Mercenary Pen
2014-10-17, 12:02 AM
*asserts that vacations are much more enjoyable when you don't impact with your destination at speeds in excess of Mach 3*

*also disassembles missile*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-17, 05:33 AM
*shoves you into an animatronic bear suit*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-17, 12:49 PM
*takes you to see a carnival*

*buys you way too much popcorn and ice cream*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-17, 01:23 PM
*wrecks havoc upon*

Haruki-kun
2014-10-17, 02:16 PM
*sweeps after the havoc*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-17, 02:20 PM
*big squeezy hugs*

Zaydos
2014-10-17, 02:27 PM
*pops out of a rabbit's hole with*

*throws through a looking glass*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-17, 07:18 PM
*feeds to the Jabberwocky*

Drakeburn
2014-10-17, 07:23 PM
*releases the Jabberwocky*

That thing is loose now. So that thing is probably going to be terrorizing the whole thread........

*runs away in panic* :smalleek:

Orm-Embar
2014-10-17, 09:03 PM
*releases a bandersnatch, in the interest of ecological balance*

*on second thought, makes it frumious*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-18, 02:17 AM
*hides behind*
*hands tpb the vorpal sword*

Zaydos
2014-10-18, 02:17 AM
*was ninja'd... still worked*

*bursts out of Orm-embar's head carrying a vorpal sword in one hand*

*snickety-snack*

*my head falls off*

@v: Apparently you just need to give me a vorpal sword. It is surprisingly effective... could somebody stick my head back on.

Drakeburn
2014-10-18, 08:53 AM
I'll get you one of these days. In the meantime......

*reads a book about How To Slay Dragons*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-18, 05:42 PM
(sneaks a Pseudonatural Pseudonatural Half-Fiend Half-Farspawn Half-Black Dragon Magebred Dungeonbred 40-Headed Laernian Dire Paragon Dark Cryotarrasque of Legend into TPAM's shoes)

Laughing Dog
2014-10-19, 08:56 AM
*awards TPAM with the title of 'Tactical Genius'*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-19, 10:09 AM
*tickles the laughing dog*

*tapes Zaydos back together again*

There ya go! Now you're a Tape Dragon. :smallbiggrin:

Drakeburn
2014-10-19, 10:15 AM
*goes on a quest to retrieve a Vorpal Blade*

*succeeds*

*cuts off Zaydos' head.... again*

There you go. Now you're the headless dragon!

Orm-Embar
2014-10-19, 10:19 AM
*hands you coffee*

*Borrows vorpal sword*

*Goes for a walk in the woods*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-19, 03:47 PM
*sets said woods on fire*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-19, 09:11 PM
*roasts marshmallow over fire*
*makes a s'more for*

Drakeburn
2014-10-19, 10:39 PM
*pours coffee into the fire*

We have more coffee than water around here for some strange reason.

Zaydos
2014-10-19, 11:10 PM
*bursts from the fire devouring Drakeburn in three bites*

I don't like coffee! That is why.

*drinks all the water*

Ninjaman
2014-10-20, 12:10 AM
*Makes Magic card of*
*Sneaks card into Wizards of the Coast's next set*

Laughing Dog
2014-10-20, 12:27 AM
*avulses arms*
*feeds the arms to an otyugh*
*exits, stage left*

Haruki-kun
2014-10-20, 10:00 AM
*staaaaaaaaaaaaaaare*

Drakeburn
2014-10-20, 11:38 AM
*applies pepper spray into your stare*

Strategos
2014-10-20, 06:27 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**places a batman mask on your face**

Zaydos
2014-10-20, 06:48 PM
*pops out of the mask*

*puts a batgirl costume on Strategos*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-20, 07:12 PM
* puts a large, dragon-y size version of this (http://spoiledrottendoggies.com/RU885953.jpg) on*

Drakeburn
2014-10-20, 08:06 PM
*puts on a Shriek costume*

Showtime!

*makes the whole thread collapse on everybody*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-20, 09:16 PM
The show must go on!

*puts Phantom of the Opera costume on Drakeburn*

*chases across rooftops*

Zaydos
2014-10-20, 09:20 PM
*Bursts out of rooftop*

*eats Orm-Embar and Drakeburn*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-21, 01:09 AM
(pelts you with sticky soda cans)

You were supposed to rinse that residual soda out of them before putting them in the recycle bin, Zaydos! Now the bin's a total mess!

Haruki-kun
2014-10-21, 01:32 AM
*Angelic hugs!*

Ninjaman
2014-10-21, 02:06 AM
*Cleaves off your wings*
*Fries them*
*Puts up a stand with a sign saying "Free fried angel wings"*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-21, 05:20 AM
*pleasantly stabbities*

Targ Collective
2014-10-21, 07:06 AM
*Wonders if it would be wise introducing Truckle the Uncivil to this conversation*

Strategos
2014-10-21, 07:16 AM
**swings in**
**kisses on cheek**
**swings away**

SpeedWitch
2014-10-21, 02:59 PM
*leaps and catches cable with sickles*

* twills down to you as you launch the next cable*

"Here, you'll need this."

*gives shark repellent*

*leaps away*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-21, 03:36 PM
*secretly replaced your shark repellent with Folgers*

Let's watch their reactions.

Targ Collective
2014-10-21, 03:50 PM
*Offers coffee as tribute*

All hail the Coffee Queen!

Drakeburn
2014-10-21, 04:21 PM
*combines Targ's white wizardry powers, coffee, and my pyromancy powers to create a barrier that Zaydos can't burst into, out of, or through it*

Let's see you try to get me now! :smalltongue:

Strategos
2014-10-21, 05:44 PM
**Noibat Used Draco Meteor!**
"Giogi's Infiltrator Ability ignores barriers."
:smalltongue:
"Anyway, now that you're out of that barrier...

Good Morning!"
**hugs**

Orm-Embar
2014-10-21, 06:13 PM
*hands you bat-coffee*

*presses the button that starts the infernal engine counting down to the destruction of Gotham*

Zaydos
2014-10-21, 06:18 PM
*releases every inmate from Blackgate Penitentiary and Arkham Asylum all at once*

*Is helping*

*provides them with technology, venom, and loyal undead minions*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-21, 07:09 PM
*leads a superior army of policeman, a batcopter, and several street-level Justice Leauge heros against you in front of city hall*

*punches in the face repeatedly*

@V As long as a sharknado doesn't blow by me, I think I'm good. Also, shark repellent. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJlHjf_E--4)

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-21, 11:04 PM
(writes your name in blood on the surface of the sea)

Queen of Slaughter, this is your enemy!

(watches the consequences of TPAM being named an enemy to sharks everywhere)

Targ Collective
2014-10-22, 05:19 AM
[does something unspeakable with a small chicken]

[and a banana]

[and several melons]

[while you watch]

[gets banned]

EmeraldRose
2014-10-22, 07:58 AM
*adds apples and pineapple to the very obvious fruit salad you were making*

*innocently sips coffee*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-22, 08:36 AM
*cheek smoochies*

B-Man
2014-10-22, 08:51 AM
* poke *

BasketOfPuppies
2014-10-22, 11:13 AM
*throws a giant Facebook "like" button at*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-22, 11:52 AM
*strolls by and waves hello without attempting to attack, frighten or anything*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-22, 03:02 PM
*calls the police anyways*

Haruki-kun
2014-10-22, 03:08 PM
*Discusses life, the universe, and everything with*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-22, 05:09 PM
(gives you a can full of peanut brittle!)

copycatcat
2014-10-22, 09:07 PM
*teleports home*
smack
*teleports back to vacation*

EmeraldRose
2014-10-22, 09:44 PM
*invites to a party*

*gives bananananananananananananananananas*

*leads into the Batman theme*

Haruki-kun
2014-10-22, 09:57 PM
*brings banana to the party, as he always does*

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-23, 01:00 AM
*swaps banana for a squash*

Orm-Embar
2014-10-23, 09:32 AM
*brings pumpkin flavored soda to the party*

*yes, I brought enough for everyone*

Drakeburn
2014-10-23, 12:40 PM
*brings egg nog to the party*

EGG NOG!!!!

Ninjaman
2014-10-23, 01:48 PM
*Brings large quantities of bacon to the party.*

SpeedWitch
2014-10-23, 03:24 PM
*mixes egg nog and bacon to create BEG NOG*

If you're not a dog, you probably won't enjoy this.

*drinks up*

copycatcat
2014-10-23, 04:31 PM
*vaporized begnog*

TheCountAlucard
2014-10-23, 05:33 PM
(traps you in the Eight Trigrams Furnace)

Strategos
2014-10-23, 06:39 PM
"Good Morning!"
**hugs**
**gives a plate of cupcakes to**

Zaydos
2014-10-24, 01:41 AM
*bursts out of center of plate mouth full of cupcakes*

Rarrmff!

RabbitHoleLost
2014-10-24, 02:38 AM
*throws dollar bills at*