Half-Gestalt (8//4) Dream Campaign, Your's and Mine (3.5 D&D)

[DracoDei]

((OOC Thread (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?409908-Half-Gestalt-(8-4)-Dream-Campaign-Your-s-and-Mine-(3-5-D-amp-D)-OOC)))

The Knights of the Feather ((Also known as the PCs)) are all sitting around in a tavern. You do that a lot since, while your order was commisioned by High King Webler himself, the details of your orders mission were never actually made clear to you, despite repeated polite requests. You are all under orders to "stand ready for the time when you will be needed", but for WHAT exactly has been a question you have long since given up pondering except as a fine way to waste an afternoon over drinks.

Earlier today a man in a brightly patchworked cloak with a large hood (that even those of you with keener than human eyes couldn't see his face under) laid a small gemstone on your table and said "When the crystal breaks, a blow is falling against this city... save it if you can." You gave chase, but he eluded you, so now you are all back right where you began, with only this one clue...

((Shall we skip to when the crystal breaks, or do y'all want to get some RP in before that?))

[Illven]

So uh. Want me to see if this crystal is magical? Jillian asked her co-workers.

And does anyone have a way to track the man?


Knowledge dugennoering [roll0]

[Thokk_Smash]

Scratching his neck in exasperation, Thaddeus regards the small gemstone. Why the man had to interrupt their drinks was beyond him. Not that he'd minded the distraction, but couldn't he have distracted them a bit longer?

I hope it isn't, because that'd mean that man's words could have a ring of truth, he says, sipping from his beer once more. The city could do without a blow against it, that's for sure. Sadly, I can't track down the man.

[zabbarot]

"We could bind it tight to hold it together. Then it can't break. City saved." Cestod nodded as he spoke.

The raven, Ma Bran, sitting on his shoulder prodded him gently. "If you have to know you could detect magic."

"Or I could just play with it 'til it does something."

She closed her eyes and shook her head slowly, but Cestod didn't notice.

[Smeggedoff]

"Playing with something fragile seems like an excellent way to get it broken" Comments Varia

[Cogsrow]

-Myr looks at the strange gemstone and sighs leaning back, her swords resting in the 3 scabbards on her back- So if it breaks, the city will come in danger, maybe it's just a bomb? a magical bomb contained within the gem? -She comments idly as she drinks from her mug- Would be the easiest way to make what you said come true

[DracoDei]

With a loud ((Listen DC -10)) CRACK!, the crystal shatters. The shards continue to vibrate, making a sound like a wet finger being run around the edge of a wine glass.

The shards of the crystal don't fly very far relative to how loud the sound of the breaking was.

The ringing sound stops.

[Illven]

Okay, so if the man is right. The city is being attacked, Should we go to city hall and protect the seat of power? Jillian asked the group.

[Thokk_Smash]

Thaddeus flinches at the sudden sound. That thing was definitely magic, he mutters, scooping as many shards into a bag as he can. Jillian's right, we should go. If he was right about it breaking on its own, he could be right about the danger!

He gets to his feet and waits for the others to get up before leaving the bar.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia blinks at the shards "Well. That was a short prophecy"


Spot
[roll0]
spellcraft
[roll1]

[Cogsrow]

-Myr gets up and nods, her swords drawing themselves from her sheathes- We best hurry then, who knows what untold horrors have been unleashed. -She'd chuckle- Something like this always foretells some great evil in fairytales

[zabbarot]

Cestod hopped up and followed after.

"Fairies have tails?"

Ma Bran just shook her head.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia bounds from the table to the door in one leap, "well, some have wings right? so maybe"

[Thokk_Smash]

Let's go to see our superior at the castle. At the very least, they need to know about the potential threat. Thaddeus leaves the inn and walks to the castle, going through the proper way to enter the quite impregnable castle.

Going to the castle to talk to our superior.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia hops after Thaddeus
also going to the castle

[DracoDei]

You rush through the streets toward the castle, using various methods to avoid any obstacles of traffic in your way by various means as allowed by your individual talents, such as taking to the walls, leaping up onto carts or over the shorter and slower pedestrians, flight*, or short range teleportation. Various offended cries are directed towards you but you do not slow your progress beyond simple justifying statements such as "Knights of the Feather, coming through! Emergency!" or vaguely similar statements.
*((I need an altitude for this/these...))
At one of the intersections...
You see (perhaps after looking more closely towards the sound of screaming) a very well-dressed gnomish woman laying on the ground about 150 feet to your left. An human with flickers of darting red dancing around him is stooped over her doing something that looks violent to her with his hands. Various people are staring or running away from the scene. Those moving toward you do not appear to be armed or otherwise a threat.

It looks like small red flames are dancing over his body, but he is completely oblivious to them. In one hand he holds a dagger, and with the other he is pulling various glinting items off of the gnome. His clothing looks well-made, but not as well made as hers.

The dagger looks scary/evil... black spikes facing forward from the hand-guard, cerations on both sides of the blade, and a slight glow from a red gemstone at center of the crossing-point of the blade+handle+hand-guards.

[Smeggedoff]

"Hey!" exclaims Varia, rebounding off a streetlamp to change direction quickly "What do you think you're doing!?"

As she moves towards the scene she fingers her raseur, deciding the answer better be a good one.


Heading towards the downed woman and the sinister figure

[Thokk_Smash]

Shifting his weight and feeling his steps become lighter, Thaddeus weaves between the bustling citizens. Sidestepping one, pivoting around his foot to avoid the other, hopping onto a wall and jumping off. Make way, make way! he yells, managing to front flip over a particularly slow merchant.

He almost doesn't stop when Varia breaks off, but manages to catch himself. Catching himself on a streetlamp, he uses the momentum to begin his movement toward whatever Varia has noticed. Knights of the Feather--cease and desist immediately!

Double movement per round towards the sinister figure and downed woman. Currently in Step of the Wind stance.

[zabbarot]

Sir Cestod charged along behind them, all but oblivious to what was going on, but intent on keeping pace.

"Wait for me! Knights of the Feather stick together!"

He did his best, here and there taking advantage of his minimal weight to leap over obstacles.

[DracoDei]

He turns and runs the crowd mostly parting before him in evident fear.

He is double-moving (the run action isn't really possible for him given the crowds) -> 60' per round. Anyone who is giving chase needs to tell me their movement rate per round assuming double-move unless you have a way of avoiding the crowd or getting them our of your way. If so, please list it.

Also, everyone needs to make a Knowledge [Local] check. 5 ranks Sense Motive get you a +2 to your check, and ditto for Spot, Hide, and/or Bluff.

Note to self:
The DC is 35-5X.

[Thokk_Smash]

Cestod! Thaddeus calls out, reaching out toward his comrade. As he feels the world around him grow far more oppressive, he tells the other Knight, Take to the sky and go after him!

Looking forward, he catches sight of the fleeing miscreant and glares. Shaking his head to himself, he bunches his calves and thighs and bullets after him. Though the weight of Cestod burdens him, and the milling citizens obstruct him, he is as a leaf on the wind as he weaves effortlessly between them.

Swift action Carry the Burden on Cestod, full round action Run 120ft.

[zabbarot]

Feeling himself become suddenly lighter, Sir Cestod leaped into the sky! Now traveling just above the crowd he moved as swiftly as he could to catch up to the running man.

"Thanks for the lift, Thaddeus." He smiled but it was hidden behind his mask, which was probably for the best really.

Full speed ahead. Running at x4 for 120ft per round unless someone else has boosted Cestod's speed. If he catches up he will attempt to bullrush the running man into the ground.

Knowledge(local) [roll0]

[DracoDei]

Thaddeus entangles the fleeing man's legs just in time for Varia to arrive and club him unconscious with the butt end of a spear.

((Ok, what now?))

[Thokk_Smash]

Excellent work, Varia! Although it will be hard to question him while he's unconscious, he says with a gently playful tone. He eyes the wicked-looking dagger in the man's hand with far less goodwill. Can someone determine what magic, if any, is on this weapon? That red gemstone doesn't look good.

Fingers and toes crossed for a natural 20 on Knowledge (Local): [roll0]

[DracoDei]

Jillian Thorncobble catches up and casts the obvious spell and also simply looks at the flames for a few seconds.

The dagger does not detect as magical.

The cloak the guy is wearing, OTOH? Faint Evocation. Her/His visual examination also identifies the flames as a modified Faerie Fire effect.

Anyone who picks up the dagger should make a roll of 1d20+BAB+Int. Mod vs DC 20.
You don't need to roll for this, it happens automatically in your case.

Also, did I ever give you editing permissions for your characters on Myth-Weavers?

[Smeggedoff]

Varia shrugs
"Unconscious people wake up" she replies

[Illven]

We might need to heal them first. Jillian replies.

[Thokk_Smash]

We should question him on the way to headquarters. We still need to speak with our superior about our concerns. Does anyone have rope to tie his hands? Thaddeus asks, approaching the downed man. After the man's hands are bound and his own bolas retrieved, Thaddeus' hands twist into a position that resembles prayer. Reaching down, he places a hand on the thief's shoulder and restores some of the man's health, enough to bring him back to consciousness.

Using Touch of the Healer to heal 4 points of damage, or enough to bring him back to consciousness, whichever is smaller.

[DracoDei]

Technically you report directly to the King himself, and it usually takes you WEEKS to get an appointment. You don't actually have that much authority/rank/security clearance either. Very odd arrangement really.

Previously you have generally turned people over to the city guard when you catch them.

Headquarters? Let me think...

Sure, you have a house you all purchased from your expense accounts and not-returnable-to-someone-it-was-stolen-from loot from the previous useful things you have found to do and/or your lives before you joined the Knights of the Feather (between one and three of you are founding members and the order hasn't been around more than 20 years at most).

The healing energy flows into the man, but he does not wake.

He comes awake, and immediately cowers as best his bonds allow him.

[Thokk_Smash]

Channeling the healing energy again, he drags the man to his feet with a stern gaze. On your feet, and start walking, he says, pushing the man firmly in the direction of the nearest city guard location. He grabs the man's arm to help him along, as well as to properly intimidate him. What's your name? Where did you get that dagger? And why were you assaulting that woman?

As if reminding himself of the woman, he looks back at where the man was assaulting her to see if she is still there, and whether she requires assistance if she is.

[DracoDei]

Channeling the healing energy again, he drags the man to his feet with a stern gaze. On your feet, and start walking, he says, pushing the man firmly in the direction of the nearest city guard location. He grabs the man's arm to help him along, as well as to properly intimidate him. What's your name? Where did you get that dagger? And why were you assaulting that woman?

As if reminding himself of the woman, he looks back at where the man was assaulting her to see if she is still there, and whether she requires assistance if she is.
"Huh? Wuh? What happ.." he mutters as he is returned to consciousness and brought to his feet.

Then the questions start.

"My name is Markus Fegus. Local smith made it for me in some town I was passing through. And I wasn't assaulting her! She started it!"

Yeah... the first two statements might be true. The last two? Not seeming very likely here.

He initially seemed just very very slightly hesitant to answer, but that faded away as soon as he started talking and didn't even make a full return when he started lying.

[Thokk_Smash]

Don't give me that bull, Thaddeus says, giving his voice a good snarl. Gripping the man's arm tighter, he moves his face closer to Markus' and stares him in the eyes. Do you really want to make the guard go through the trouble of finding eyewitnesses? There must've been a dozen or more, it'd only be a matter of time, and they surely won't appreciate your wasting their time.

[DracoDei]

Markus seems quite taken aback at first, then something shifts and he calms, a tiny smirk coming to his lips.

"Why yes, that actually sounds good to me."

[Illven]

Jillian starts poking in the captive man's pockets looking for anything remotely interesting.

Once they've been emptied she scans the contents, and the man with her detect magic spell.


Search [roll0]

[DracoDei]

The man was actually carrying a small backpack (much worn and well mended). She finds a large number of common objects:
A Tinderbox.
2 tindertwigs in a smaller waterproof container
Flint and steel
20' of hemp rope.
A small knife
A whetstone
Some... well they apparently started out as raspberries, but by now they have defaulted to raspberry jam of a sort.
A small box of what appears to be rancid fat
A candle-using (rather than oil and a wick) version of a bull's eye lantern.
7 candles (one of them has an X cut into the bottom and the tip of the wick... well it could be a trick of your imagination, it seems like it MIGHT be magical? It is so short a piece of a line and such faint power, if there is any magic... you really can't tell)
A hatchet (doesn't look like a weapon)
A ball of twine
A sewing needle and some plain thread (apparently the thread used to sew the lockpicks (see below) into his sleeves was came from this length).
Two fishhooks with strings
A vial labeled "Antitoxin"
A new waterskin (full)
An old waterskin (empty)
A pair of heavy-soled boots in the prisoner's size.
A pair of shoes with slightly domed wooden disks instead of soles. The disks are about 12 inches in diameter and flat on top, with the doming being the bottom part.
A shaker with large holes full of very finely ground pepper, garlic, and some other stuff... some of which you can't even identify.
A stylized rabbit's head carved from white soap-stone... the shoulders flair out oddly, and below that... is only a jagged surface, as if it was part of a larger sculpture but was broken off. (Market value: less than 10 GP)
A small ruby, A small garnet, 7 gold pieces, 10 silver pieces, and, oddly enough NO copper
Anything else I might have forgotten

Of more obvious interest are:
-A hand crossbow and 9 normal-looking bolts... and one more bolt that is both more well-made, and also appears to be poisoned by the color of the head... odd that he would keep this in his backpack, rather than more near to hand... (Note that poisons aren't automatically evil in my campaigns... in fact some paladins get "Safe Poison Use" at first level.)
-The VERY nasty looking dagger (surprisingly it DOESN'T detect as magical... of course there are ways of hiding magical auras...)
-His cloak (still alight with spectral red flames, detects as Faint Evocation)
-A two pairs of lockpicks, inexpertly sewn to the insides of each of his sleeves... not sewn into the hem or in a little pocket you understand, just with threads crossed over them. DC 15 to find, at most...
-A small opaque glass vial in one of his pockets alone with nothing else (his other pocket held several of the smaller items mentioned above). It couldn't hold more than an ounce volume at most, so probably not a potion. The cork is... well, you aren't even sure if there IS a cork under all that hard wax. The vial is long and narrow (like a modern test-tube) and appears to be weighted to strike with the non-waxed end first if thrown... but you can't quite imagine what substance could be so potent that this little of it would do anything. Its discovery elicits a comment from the man:
"I suggest you be careful with that, or none of us are going to be happy."
Jillian holds the vial up near her ear and gives it a shake, but hears nothing moving inside.
-A clear glass bottle found in a heavily padded case. The bottle is a bit lumpy, but the glass is of surpassing clarity, good enough to grind telescope lenses from. The neck is thick-walled enough to be quite sturdy, but the hole through which something might be poured out is very small. Oddly enough, it appears to be empty but... it FEELS and SOUNDS like it is half full of water/wine/milk/anything of that approximate density and viscosity. There is a piece of brass set into the bottom, with a pattern stamped into it, like a very thin (and thus underweight) coin, it appears to be some sort of manufacturer's mark. Further examination does not bring the pattern to mind... but... huh... there appear to be TWO symbols. One is the aforementioned maker's mark, and the other... is a skull and crossbones, with a circle and strike-through... so "Not Poisonous"? Why would someone go to the trouble of specifically labeling something as NOT being poison? (The bottle, and/or its contents detect as Faint Transmutation).
-In the same case as the above is a set of scales, with one side being a cup, and the opposite side being weighted to counterbalance the cup precisely. The weights included with it vary from small enough to weigh out the larger sizes of gemstones, all the way up to two ounces. (Not magical)
-Also in the same case, six white linen "napkins", three about 8 inches on a side, three about twice that size. Each is folded diagonally. Oddly enough, despite neither the clips nor the cloths being magical, the clips securing these are masterfully made. It seems like one is supposed to be able to grab each one out with great ease, but that they would not come loose on their own, especially when the case is closed.

[Thokk_Smash]

Thaddeus stays within an arm's reach of Markus as Jillian searches the man's backpack, standing in front of the man face-to-face. He observes the man's reactions to the search with keen eyes and a sharp mind.

What is in the bottle marked with the scored-out skull and crossbones? he asks, once Jillian has finished her search.

Sense Motive: [roll0]

[DracoDei]

Thaddeus stays within an arm's reach of Markus as Jillian searches the man's backpack, standing in front of the man face-to-face. He observes the man's reactions to the search with keen eyes and a sharp mind.

What is in the bottle marked with the scored-out skull and crossbones? he asks, once Jillian has finished her search.

Sense Motive: [roll0]

He opens his mouth, then blinks and closes it, blinks again and starts talking.
"Magical... hmmm... guess you could call it a salve or sumthin' like that? Various uses. One requires you to put a bit in your mouth and swish it around like 'til it goes away. Not fer' drinkin' though. Don't think it would do any harm, but it would be a right waste. Stuff's a right pain to measure too, seein' as how its invisible. That's what the scales are fer. You can try a bit of it on one o' you or on me if you like. Quarter ounce weight for me or you, two sizes smaller on the weight fer the little folk I'd say. Not sayin' its pleasant, but its far from poison, just like the bit o' metal says."

Doesn't seem to be lying. Obviously was stopping himself from saying more though.

Also... something about the smaller vial seems familiar to Thaddeus. Can't quite place the context though.

[Illven]

Okay, what are the uses? Jillian asks, swiftly becoming annoyed.

[DracoDei]

Okay, what are the uses? Jillian asks, swiftly becoming annoyed.
"Well, I'll give you one for free... past that... I'll need a deal with a magistrate. Soak one of those-there bandana's, or any bit of cloth in the stuff and wear it over your mouth and it'll keep you breathin' in a fire. Won't save your skin you understand, and I think yer lungs and mouth can still scorch, but you won't choke. Takes the ounce weight to last you about ten minutes. After that you'll be wanting to wet the cloth down again. 'Course if your in a hurry you can just tie on the cloth and slop some of the juice on. That's what them-there clips are special-made for, so you can grab the cloths quick and reliable-like."
And that would explain what he probably wants when he said he would be glad to be taken to the guard... he thinks he has something worth bargaining for a reduced sentence with to the guard or magistrate.

[Thokk_Smash]

Okay, that seems useful enough; but why should we believe that its other uses are enough to warrant a magistrate's attention?

His hand passes over the smaller vial for a moment, and his tail twitches in recognition. He takes out a cloth and carefully wraps the small vial before placing it securely in the pack. He was not joking about that. Make sure that does not break.

He picks up the wicked looking dagger and inspects it for a moment. A "local smith" skilled enough to make something this exquisite must be famous. What was their name? He passes it to Jillian for her to inspect as well.

Time for my 4.75 BAB and +0 Int modifier to shine! [roll0]

[DracoDei]

You'd need a few minutes and a target (a wooden post might do in a pinch) to slash at to be sure, but your initial assessment is that it is NOT a masterwork weapon. Not a terrible weapon (no penalties to-hit or damage), but nothing special in that regard as far as you can tell. Its... "artistic" quality seems to far outshine is value as an example weaponcraft.

"Err... gimme a sec... it was... Berec... no Ferec Bronze-Hand. Dwarf in... I think it were Willow Springs?"

[DracoDei]

"As fer your other question, I'd say that was between me and the magistrate. You can tell 'im to bump the charges up a bit if I'm... well if I'm exadurating a bunch."

I ended up giving this guy a bit of a "hick" accent. In my defense I'm kinda making up a lot of the details on the fly. What I should specify is that while this might or might not indicate a low an intelligence score. What it does NOT indicate is a low charisma score. He actually has a pretty high charisma score.

He was about to say something else after 'if I'm...' but changed his phrasing.

[Illven]

Please speak in plain common, so I can follow along. Jillian adds. What exactly are you hoping for the magistrate to do?

Dagger is as far as I can tell non-magical by the way. She replied turning to her comrade. Think it's time to turn him over to the local guard? She asks stretching luxuriously.

[DracoDei]

"Well, as some might tend tah think I done somethin' wrong, I was hopin' to demonstrate mah good will toward this fair city to 'im or 'er with some information that might prove of interest tah the watch."

[DracoDei]

It appears at though Thaddeus might be about to add something, but before he can screams ring out in another direction. Seconds later a thin hazy of smoke where no chimney is can be seen in that direction. There is no direct road in that direction, but at least one of you knows several ways you could reach where the smoke seems to be coming from.

I told you not to wait for Thokk_Smash...

Battlemap is HERE (https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1kna3n6DDoCLAlXMdXBAwfymED0TcQEwVu0k9TDPybfY/edit#gid=0). Large black areas of black cells (rather than walls only one to three cells thick) should be assumed to be buildings on fire by the time you can all get there, unless you present a compelling reason why it would be more interesting or fair for me to fill in more of the shops.

You may approach from any direction. You may scout or simply arrive as a group. I'll put the enemies NPCs, carts, draft/riding animals, etc on the map when you first catch sight of them. But I need you to move towards all relevant tactical decisions with concerted effort rather than long pauses. Handle it IN CHARACTER as much as possible and DO NOT wait for eachother to speak or make short statements when you actually have more you could say. This is, in my experience/understanding, the ONLY way to keep an PbP game going.

Of course, I'll also need to know what you are doing with the prisoner...

[Illven]

Jillian, casts fly on herself and Thaddeus, and helps Thaddeus carry the prisioner.

Jeez. She comments. If you were caught by standard guards, this is the part where we'd tell you this is your lucky day and that we have bigger fish to fry.

Unfortunately for you, we're not standard guards. Thaddeus let's drop him off at the guard house, and then see what we can do about the fire. She suggests.

Flying to the guardhouse, once she is there she drops the prisoner gently onto the ground.

Knights of the feather official business. She states flashing her mark of office. Watch over him, as we deal with the flames. She orders hastily.

Assuming they say yes, she flies off.

Start at B2. What do we see?

[DracoDei]

You arrive at the guard-station in question, with the prisoner. You discover a group of panicked people in front of it. The babble of voices seems to be on the theme of "Where are the guards?"

Thaddeus tries to calm them, but it is proving slightly difficult.

"Perhaps you could see if they left the cell door open and the locks are of the sort where they lock automatically on close? Or else-wise that they left the keys here?" suggests Thaddeus.

((Thaddeus will not be going inside.))

Yes, the key to the cell is hanging on a hook on the opposite side of a desk (with drawers) from the open cell.


Anything you want to do before you come around the corner?

[Illven]

Jillian goes inside and deals with the prisoner.

[DracoDei]

The city has become a madhouse... theft, plunder, senseless beatings and killings, rape... every sort of evil-doing are happening everywhere. The Knights of the Feather must split up in order to aid the city. Varia and Jillian are the only people to arrive at the site of the fire that was their original destination. A powerfully muscled figure, taller than a human((Still medium sized...)), and wearing a chain shirt can be seen across the square ((AK26)) just coming out of a building fully involved in flames. Several weapons and a shield can be seen slung at its back though its hands are empty. What look like black scales cover its skin.

It actually looks like it has painted itself black, rather than that necessarily being its natural coloration.

[Illven]

(Assuming that the man appears uninjured)

Jillian holds out her hands in a stop gesture.

Man in the chain shirt! Stop in the name of the Knights of the Feather! Jillian called out, one hand flashing her symbol of office, the other ready to cast a spell if the Man made a hostile gesture, or tried to run.

[Illven]

Jillian bolted to action when the man did not seem to be willing to listen to the law!

Fireball's a terrible choice for obvious reasons. And the rest of my spells can't reach him.

Jillian intones a few magical words, before she vanishes from sight.
Entoi vairala


Casting invisibility, and moving to J10 with flight.

[DracoDei]

The apparent arsonist moves forward with a certain vigilance counterbalanced by great swiftness of foot. As he/she/it moves he/she/it draws a javelin.
Move Action: Moving to A21 while drawing.
Standard Action: Unknown, possibly none.
Swift Action: Unknown, possibly none.

[Illven]

As the man runs out into the open, Jillian tests his spell resistance with a stereotypical mage spell with a twist before flying up a small amount

Burinca Implusa Velica. She calls out soaring high.


Assuming no civilians in the burst zone, Jillian casts a Energy substitution Electricity fireball AD21 to AE 22 15-20 feet into the air. (The Pyro, should be just at the bottom of this spell, and it should avoid any buildings.

She then five foot steps further above ground, reaching 15 feet in the air.

[roll0] Electrical damage
Save DC, standard should be 19, sheet says 17?

[DracoDei]

The individual in question fails to successfully mitigate the effects of Jillian's spell in any way at all.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia grin, takes a small hop forward and then flashes into the air towards the pyro, barely touching the ground at her midpoint.


move - Jump[roll0]
Standard - Jump [roll1]

[DracoDei]

Your opponent moves forward shouting a word you can't quite understand, once again showing surprising swiftness for the way it holds its javelin always ready. The marks fo the lightning on it seem to fade a bit.
Swift: Maybe?
Move Action: Go to to X19
Standard: Ready action to throw.

Recovers 2 hitpoints. Down 15.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia narrows her eyes at the man's cautious actions, two can play at that game!

Springing forward she brings up her cold iron ranseur in a defensive stance, hopping from one foot to the other even after landing


Move action
Jump
[roll0]
standard
total defence

[Illven]

Jillian flies 30 feet up, (45 total now) and shoots off another spell.

Conjuring four bright lights to streak towards the pyro.

He's a caster! She shouts to warn her allies.


Casting magic missile.

[roll0]

[DracoDei]

((IF Varia is still material))
The creature throws a javelin at Varia, but it doesn't even make contact with her armor, let alone penetrate it.

((Regardless))
Jillian's attacks strike home.
-29 hp at this time... will be -27 after its turn.


((And back to being conditional. If Varia is on the Etherial, then it will throw a Javelin at Jillian.))
The creature charges at Varia and swipes with a clawed hand, but this also misses. From this close range she can see a madness to it that seems to be quite at odds with Jillian's claim that this creature is in any mindset to cast spells.
2nd round of curative effect, 2nd round of Rage
Fast heals for 2.
27 points of damage

[Smeggedoff]

Following the momentum from the quick melee, Varia springs into the sky, bracing herself to hang when she hits her apex and beginning to shimmer slightly


Full Round - Leap Attack

Was the map updated? The enemy didn;t seem to be in Melee range with Varia, I went with the current location but feel free to move me around as long as my alter point token stays in range

[Illven]

Jillian continues to blast the creature with magic missiles.

Surrender to the law, criminal! She shouts out.


Magic missile 2. Force attack boogaloo. [roll0]

[DracoDei]

The creature moves as close to Jillian as it can get without losing the tempo of its attacks. As it rushes forward it draws another javelin and finally throws it at her. It misses.
Move Action: Go to K10 while drawing javelin.
Standard: Throw Javelin.
To-Hit [roll0](after accounting for -2 to hit for range)
Damage [roll1]
Crit. Confirm [roll2](after accounting for -2 to hit for range)
Crit. Damage [roll3]

Current hitpoints down 39 after this round's fast healing.

Explanation for leaving A.I.P. radius:
Varia isn't incorporeal, she is ethereal. She's on another plane of existence, and totally invisible to anyone without some pretty good magical senses.

Javelin's have a 30' range increment, and getting directly below a flying spellcaster is... a smart thing to do for reasons I'm not going to reveal.

[Illven]

Jillian manages to dodge the javelin in mid air.

Oh, is that how you want to be? I think you'll find my next spell, quite a shock! She calls out.

She fires out two rays, that are ruby red for the first second, before turning blue and impacting the criminal,

She then flies up a tad.


Casting Energy substitution electricity scorching ray. If possible the first ray is nonlethal

Ray 1
[roll0]
[roll1]
Crit confirm
[roll2]
[roll3]

Ray 2
[roll4]
[roll5]
Crit confirm
[roll6]
[roll7]

[DracoDei]

Decisions, decisions... there is a feat for dealing subdual damage with spells, and I'm not sure if taking -4 to-hit to deal subdual damage with them is R.A.W. I don't feel like looking it up at this time either, but I suspect it isn't.

Still it does make a sort of sense.

My gut instinct is that having this guy alive is just going to unnecessarily complicate things given how the last prisoner went.

Meh... I'll just put off actually deciding.

The foe crumples to the ground. You can't tell if he is alive or dead, but he definitely looks "down for the count" despite whatever magic is/was healing him.

A violent roar splits the air, and Jillian spins around just in time to see a massive winged form, black, but vaguely humanoid, dive for cover behind a building. The sound of wingbeats draws closer, but you can't see the large creature.

((3 rounds until next encounter, assuming you maintain approximate positions... what are y'all going to do with them? Keep in mind Varia didn't see the other creature, so Jillian should fill her in when she pops back. It is just good roleplaying to do so!))

[Smeggedoff]

Varia shimmers back into existence and lands with a thud and a pout
"Dangit, I guess I need more practice with that. Good work Jillian"

[Illven]

That man has a accomplice I think. Jillian said pointing towards the building. I saw a winged creature fly behind that. She stated.

We should go and check. Jillian says starting to drift towards the building.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia nods sharply "Un!"
And Leaps off in the direction indicated

[DracoDei]

Of course, you weren't ALL at the pub when the crystal broke... two more members of the Knights of the Feather have managed to find Jillian and Varia.

((3 rounds until big-nasty arrives))

You notice that the black coloration of your fallen foe is actually some sort of grease-paint. The actual scales have a different tinge to them (not going to say which one since your OOC knowledge exceeds your IC knowledge on a key point and I don't want to tempt you too much...).

[BilltheCynic]

Greg floats through a nearby wall and joins the others.

Hello everybody! Sorry I'm late. I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Alburquerque.

Greg looks around at the city.

Hmm. You know, this place looks a little bit more...on fire than I remember it. Eh, that's probably just me. So, did you guys find out what the deal with that crystal thingy is?

Moving to K11. Greg is floating 5 ft above the ground.

[r2d2go]

Joseph runs in, a bit out of breath, glaives at the ready. "Shoot, this is what I get for running around trying to find things to do. What am I stabbing?"

[Smeggedoff]

Varia shrugs
"I'm as confused as you are" she chirps brightly "But a big thing with wings just went thataway" she gestures in the direction Jillian indicated "So we were going to go investigate"

[Illven]

Can you two come with? Jillian asked the two newbies.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg's eyes narrow dangerously.

Big thing? Wings? Thataway? So, it looks like my old archnemesis has found me again. We have to stop him before he steals any more garden gnomes...or whisper gnomes or svirfneblin for that matter. Onward!

[Illven]

Greg's eyes narrow dangerously.

Big thing? Wings? Thataway? So, it looks like my old archnemesis has found me again. We have to stop him before he steals any more garden gnomes...or whisper gnomes or svirfneblin for that matter. Onward!

... What? Jillian asked blinking her eyes.

[r2d2go]

To Jillian, Joseph says, "Of course." Beginning to fly up to engage the reported winged opponent, he gets his glaives spinning.

Flying up 40 feet.

[BilltheCynic]

What? What?! Isn't it obvious? We have to stop him before he takes any more gnomes! There's no time to lose! Charge!

Greg makes as if to charge, then abruptly stops.

So, um, which way is thataway again?

[Smeggedoff]

Varia grumbles something about being the only one unable to fly and bounces after the party

[BilltheCynic]

Oh, thataway is thataway! Ok, it all makes sense now. Hmm, if we're going to defeat my archnemesis, we're gonna have to use out thinky things and out-strategize him. I've got just the thing for that.

Out of thin air Greg pulls a book labeled Zapp Brannigan's Big Book of War. While holding it upside-down he flips to the middle of it and reads a section of it.

Hmm. Let's see, how to defeat rampaging killbots, how to seduce a cyclops...ah, here it is! How to defeat your archnemesis if it is a flying creature coming straight down the road at you and you only have eighteen seconds to prepare. Ok, here's the plan. Jillian, Joseph and I will hide while Varia stands in the middle of the street as bait. When she sees my archnemesis she will proceed to taunt him, perhaps comparing its mother to a hamster and implying its father smelled of elderberries. When it approaches to attack her, she yells the signal, and all of us jump him. The signal is "LEEROY JENKINS!".

Oh, this? Well, you know how when you read a map upside down, you go the opposite way that you want to? It's the same thing here. This book has terrible tactics, but because I'm reading it upside-down I get the opposite of that, so I can get some decent stratemagisms from it.

Alright then, let's avenge us some lawn gnomes.Double moving to Q14 and diving 5 ft underground.

[Illven]

Shall... Shall I make us invisible at least. Jillian offers blinking rapidly.

[BilltheCynic]

Shall... Shall I make us inv-

Greg doesn't hear anymore before he dives underground. He wonders what Jillian was about to say. Invocable? Invigorating? Inviting? Inviting! Jillian probably wants to make them inviting so Greg's archnemesis would be sure to attack them. Yeah, that sounds about right. Good old Jillian always thinking of everything.

[Illven]

Jillian sighs, and gets to the castings of invisibility.


2, one on the familiar, and one on Joseph.

[r2d2go]

Joseph nods his thanks as he descends, just before he turns invisible, standing near Varia. His weapons return to his hands to conceal them as he prepares to attack.

I assume my weapons aren't invisible unless I'm holding them. In any case, I'll ready an attack-mode-3 flurry if I can, otherwise, just a single attack.

[DracoDei]

((Computer issues. Please hold.))

[Smeggedoff]

Varia blinks while everyone around her vanishes in varying ways.

"Wait what? *sigh* I'll just stay here then shall I? Here, monster monster..."


Prepared action: if the monster approaches to melee range to attack, leap attack targeting my current square

[r2d2go]

Hmph. I suppose I'll prepare to engage, then. Joseph floats invisibly towards the somewhat daunting, but mostly just clearly targetable figure, placing himself in front of Varia to intercept.

Double move while flying to noted location (figures in parens are height). Will refrain from AoOs until Varia gets out.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg prepares to face down this horrid creature and strike a blow for justice the only way he knows how: by driving the offending party completely bonkers. He pulls a banana from his bag, smashes it into a pulp with his club, then pulls the ghost of the banana from the remains. He then waits for the perfect moment to unleash the fruit.

Move to P15 and ready an action. If Greg detects the creature standing directly above him, he will use the banana peel drop maneuver on P15.
Trip check: [roll0]

[Illven]

Jillian stays in place and waits for the right moment to cast her spell.


Ready to cast Magic missile against the enemy if it tries to close into melee range.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia continues to hold her prepared action

[DracoDei]

This is probably just the sleep deprivation effecting me (so I'm going to keep this pretty small), but I laughed pretty hard at Greg's action.

50 XPs for Greg.

The creature rounds the corner. Something that over-muscled has no business being in the air. It roars, and (while the Knights of the Feather prepare themselves even better for its arrival) monologues a bit at Varia... it MIGHT have had a chance of being intimidating, if it wasn't that it is so infuriating that it kills any fear she might have possibly felt.

"You killed my half-brother. Now granted, I'd have probably done the same thing in a few years, even if dad didn't ask me to. What's he going to do? Make me replace him? I've only <uncooth term for sexual intercourse> his birth-sow a few times, and most of those she was already carrying for dad... mostly 'cus if a sow ain't carried for four months straight he just eat 'em. Keeps the rest of 'em motivated, y'know? They say that ogres and orcs can't breed, but dad says with enough dragon in you anythin's possible, and it would be fun to try.

Shoot, maybe I'll keep one of you around to try with too... if the baby breathes out fi- I mean <swear word starting with "f", and yes, that letter is important enough I'm putting it in> I mean if he spits proper, I'll even let you and it live. 'Course, I can't have you getting too uppity, but I do like's me the taste of eyeballs, so that all works out.

Take a good look at these teeth... their the last thing you're ever going to see!

These claws too, get used to their sweat caress running through your skin to the fat underneath, a proper dragon-blooded don't need no teat, only weaklings not worthy to bear scales. Hey, but maybe I'll actually leave 'em mostly intact, give the little one some idea what his teeth are for. Make sure he prefers blood to milk, y'know? Yeah! That's a great idea!

You got a stud? <Expletive> tell me where I can find him and I'll let him join me! AS A GELDING!! Shoot, I'll pull his wimpy little teeth, and then I'll see if I can't make him vomit out a kid for me. Stomach, woman-bag, they taste a bit different, but maybe you never know until you try, that's science, like those shrimpy pansy gnomes get up to."

He then froths at the mouth and tries to charge at Varia while on the wing, but she vanishes upwards* just before he can get within reach of his clawed hands. Greg withholds his banana peel for now since the foe's feet aren't on the ground.
*(With a witty quip and/or self-satisfied smile?)


((All Player Characters, including familiar: GO!))

[r2d2go]

Joseph appears above the uncouth brute, beginning to swing as Varia disappears. "I don't think -" he punctuates this with a twin, downwards smash of his guisarme, as he clicks his heels, feeling the magical speed permeate his weapons and body - "those words were necessary -" another smash with his pickaxe, along with a sweep of a guisarme - "Do you?" Continuing to beat the brute to the ground, Joseph finishes with a final downwards swing of pickaxe and guisarme, and a levitating shift to engage.

Move Action: Moving my weapons down and south 5'.
Free Action: Five foot step southwest.
Swift Action: Activating Burning Blade.
Free Action: Activating my Boots of Speed for this round.
Standard Action: Making a bunch of attacks:

Guisarmes: [roll0], [roll1], [roll2], [roll3]
Pick: [roll4], [roll5]

Damage:

Guisarmes: [roll6] + [roll7], [roll8] + [roll9], [roll10] + [roll11], [roll12] + [roll13]

Pick: [roll14] + [roll15], [roll16] + [roll17]



Now that I think about it, I probably should have rolled trips immediately rather than waiting to see which ones hit. Doing that OoC.

Let me know if any of the distances are a problem.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg face-palms. He has got to get a better archnemesis. This one is just so generic. Blah blah I'm a sexist jerk blah blah smash you now blah blah *snore*. It is clear that his banter had not improved at all since Greg first stopped him at the annual puppy eating competition. And perhaps worst of all, he didn't have the decency to slip on a banana peel for Greg. Jerk.
Discarding the banana peel, Greg rises from the ground.
Pffsh. You have no chance against Varia. I'll have you know that her exploits are so amazing that they are the subject of six best selling YA novels, available at a retailer near you. But that's beside the point. I have come to stop you and your insane lawn gnome stealing scheme. First you target old man Henderson, then Dr. Doofenshmirtz, it seems like there would be no end to your madness. But there's one thing you didn't count on.
Greg's eyes suddenly widen and he points behind his archnemesis.
Oh my gods what's that?!
Then Greg jumps inside his body.

5 ft step up in P15 and try to enter his square using malevolence.
Will save DC to resist malevolence: 18
Greg forces the creature to repeatedly punch himself in the face.
Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?On Greg's next turn, full attack to make the creature punch itself (nonlethal damage).
Greg jumps out of the creature wheezing.
*Cough* *Cough* When's the last time you bathed? Moving back to P15.

[DracoDei]

The foul-mouthed creature fails to notice the moment that Joseph fades into view, being to busy making contact with the ground as the first blow fouls his wings, causing a hasty landing and the second sweeps his legs out from under him. His scales and armor might have protected him if his attack hadn't been so reckless... nah, who are we kidding? You would have found way to strike home anyway with form that good!

So, that is the good news... the bad news is that the flames wash over your target, but only serve to make his grease-paint smolder... revealing red scales beneath*.
((Hey, I SAID I play my enemies smart. Just because this guy has Int as his dump-stat doesn't mean that his father isn't at least Int 12... not that I blame you for trying, even if you had figured it out, which I'm not sure if you did even OOC, and with no ranks in Knowledge[Arcana] IC... yeah.))
Status: Prone on the ground, down 42 hitpoints (before this rounds healing kicks in... yeah, he drank a potion before he rounded the corner).

((Just updating after a players action, which I won't always do, so don't wait on it!))

[DracoDei]

((Oops, I got sword-saged by the ethereal Swordsage...))

Oh, yeah... that body odor is on the level of the legendary "Bog of Eternal Stench"... or at least Greg should be going for the brain and the heart when he tries that sort of thing, rather than the spleen and the appendix...

((Natural 20 on the save...))

[Illven]

Jillian would have been worried when the red scales were revealed. Fire spells were all she knew. Except magic missile, and invisibility, and fly. But you get the point.

But she wasn't your average ordinary sorceress. I mean besides the rogue levels.

She had the power of an electrical storm!


Casting Energy substitution (Electricity) Fireball

Reflex save 17. [roll0] electric damage.

Centered O13-P14. 15-20 feet up. (Pretty much the bottom should be hitting big bad dragon guy and no one else.)

My familiar waits.

[DracoDei]

Jillian fades into view as the ogre rolls to the side a bit, dodging the worst of the lightning, which also scorches a few of the lowest shingles on the eves of the building, but experience has taught her that there is no danger of them catching fire.
Down 52 HP (before potion, which triggers on his turn). Prone, Grounded.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia screeches back into reality with the sound of tearing sky
"Gods you have a mouth on you!" she yells, driving a ranseur at the weak join between neck and shoulder "gurk! and the smell! Do you bathe?"


Leap attack - attack phase
jump check - uh, I can actually double the 15 foot dc without rolling so I won't bother unless dracodei deems it necessary
Attack roll
[roll0] (+13 +2 charge +4 prone)
if Varia hits
Damage = [roll1] (cold iron) + [roll2] electricity
Beastie seems to be flanked on the map so
sneak attack damage [roll3]
All of the above damage is doubled if applicable from leap attack
Iterative attack
[roll4]
Damage = [roll5] (cold iron) + [roll6] electricity +[roll7] sneak attack
NOT doubled

All three impact points labelled on map, remove once confirmed as necessary. Not that the second attack originated from the final landing point NOT from the impact point

finally Varia is at -2 ac for the round, whee

[DracoDei]

Varia's first strike pierces the foes shoulder, and he lapses unconscious.

Don't think flanking applies when you aren't one of the flankers... good thing that Greg can end up directly below an opponent if he chooses! Which he didn't in this case...
anyway, we can check this point in the SRD at some other time.

Similarly, I feel like a double-check that people on the Ethereal HEAR the material might be useful for future reference. This time around it served roleplaying and had no mechanical impact, so I'm good with it.

However you DO get the sneak attack on the first one since you are coming in from the Ethereal fast enough to count as invisible for that attack for most purposes, unless the target can see into the Ethereal.

As for your options, the ones I can see are:
Follow up with the second for the kill?
Deal subdual damage to be sure?
Refrain from striking a helpless foe?
Do something with a move action?
Do something I haven't thought of.

He's at -3 hp.

[Smeggedoff]

As the beast collapses, Varia spins her weapon, striking with the butt of the weapon instead of the blade


I think a subdual strike to make sure he stays down is the more sensible of the options you offered, as far as Varia is aware anyway. Killing the beast could prevent us form gaining valuable intel, no matter how crude he is.

[Illven]

Upon seeing the beast collapse.

"Okay, guys. Let's tie him up, and we have fires to fight! She calls out.

Anyone actually any good with rope, here? She adds as an afterthought.

[r2d2go]

Joseph shrugs. "Not really. I could always beat him further unconscious, just to be safe. I get the feeling rope wouldn't do much, anyway..."

[BilltheCynic]

Reaching into the side of his body as if it were a pocket, Greg pulls out 50 feet of rope.

Here's some rope. Now we can tie up the massive, super strong, fire breathing, razor clawed half dragon without having to worry about him escaping!

Pulling 50 feet of hempen rope from my bag of holding. The rope is incorporeal right now, but if Greg drops it it will become corporeal.

[DracoDei]

Some of his more serious wounds start to close but he does not awaken.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia sighs and puts the boot in some more
"It looks like we've got a healer. Anyone know how to keep him down without killing him? I'd rather not keep attacking a helpless foe"

[r2d2go]

Joseph helps where he can by smacking him with the flat of his guisarmes.

Smack [roll0] [roll1]
Smack [roll2] [roll3]
Smack [roll4] [roll5]

[BilltheCynic]

Greg shrugs, reaches to the side, then out of nowhere pulls out a massive safe and slams it onto the half dragon.
Haha! That's one's for the lawn gnomes and the puppies!
Greg turns to Varia.
I'm sorry, what did you say? I couldn't hear you over the sound of me continuing to attack a helpless foe.

Using Safe drop maneuver on the half dragon, nonlethal damage.
[roll0]
Reflex 19 for half.

[DracoDei]

You all conclude that the foe is likely to remain unconscious for at least a full minute after that pounding, even with his apparent healing abilities.

[Illven]

It's a spell, I think. Jillian hollars out.

It'll end eventually, just disarm him and keep a thought out to make sure he doesn't wake up. She suggests.

[r2d2go]

Joseph shrugs. "I'll just keep beating on him, then?"

I'll continue nonlethal smacking until otherwise noted.

[BilltheCynic]

Disarm him? Say no more. I am a master at the art of disarming. Now, we're going to need four horses. We'll tie some rope to each arm and to the horses, and then we'll get the horses to run in opposite directions so that...oh, you meant remove his weapons didn't you? Right, that makes more sense. The horses leave a huge mess. Such a drag to clean up. Anyway, let's get his weapons out of here.

Hey, weapons! Get out of here!

Obediently, the half-dragon's weapons jump up and dash away as fast as they can.

Standard action telekinesis (violent thrust) on all of the half-dragon's weapons (max 12/250 lb, whichever is lower) and hurling them to I6.
Telekinesis recharge: [roll0] rounds.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia Sighs as the weapons scamper away, recalling some very specific wording about valour and chivalry.
"I concur, regarding the spell anyway. No more hitting him though. We'll just have to hope that the bonds hold well enough when he wakes up. Anywhere nearby we can put him that would work as a cell?"

[DracoDei]

After a while the healing stops. You have just gotten done stripping him of everthing but his armor (too hard to get off without completely untying him again), and are considering the matter of if his great mass is sufficient reason to DRAG him to the nearest guard-post* rather than trying to carry him.

*((If anyone who HASN'T rolled it before can make a DC 15 Knowledge[Arcana] check, then you are actually going to the THIRD nearest guard-post, since that is the closest one with fire-proof cells...))

At this point, the team's healer shows up, and y'all proceed with transporting the half-dragon ogre. Surprisingly the violence throughout the city is tailing off very rapidly for how intense it has gotten.

Before you can even get a word out at the guard post one of the guardsmen informs you that you have a message that takes priority over any possible report you could give. The message is "The bird flies free, and only a single feather may tip the balance, in this, our hour of greatest need.".

Which is your cue to drop everything and proceed discretely but speedily to a certain household that you all have never been to before, and yet have memorized the location of and have a heavily magical key to.

As soon as you close the door behind you, your surroundings blur, and you find yourself in a small cave without exit, but whose walls are covered in runes.

"Welcome my faithful servants, you have no idea how greatly your services are needed!" says The King, who is the only other person present.

((Dramatic Cliffhanger/Chance to respond rather than the GM fast-forwarding through everything.))

[BilltheCynic]

Ok, just as long as whatever we're supposed to do can be finished by Tuesday. That's when my massage is scheduled. You would not believe how hard it is to find a massage therapist with ghost touch gloves.

[r2d2go]

Joseph raises an eyebrow at Greg, but otherwise remains silent and simply waits for the hopefully inevitable explanation.

[Smeggedoff]

Varia drops to one knee
"My liege"

[ngilop]

Tinac bows as well to the king "my services are at your disposal."

[Illven]

Yes, what seems to be the problem, my liege? Jillian asks while curtsying.

[DracoDei]

"In brief: Fer-Elsa, my third-born, has been kidnapped and I need you to rescue her.

Or to put it the long way: There is a prophecy that if a person who is the eldest living female born in the month of January, and descendant of both the Devil-King Twefire Balgaroax and at least one of the heroes who imprisoned him several thousand years ago, is sacrificed on an altar made from the skulls of the followers of the that Devil-King who have died of old age, with a weapon dedicated to the causes of Evil and Law, during a certain astrological conjunction that starts at noon in exactly 340 days, and lasts for 5 days, 5 hours, and 5 minutes, then he will be freed, whole, and able to wreak his vengeance far and wide. He would then establish a Kingdom in the mortal world.

My daughter is the person who fits that bill. Fortunately, if she dies at the hands of the cult of Balgaroax, that will invalidate the chance the prophecy speaks of, even if they also have a younger person who fits the bill also ready to be sacrificed. Unfortunately, the prophecy makes it clear that such a one as Fer-Elsa WOULD be available to them. Examining the situation, I correctly deduced that turning her heart would be unlikely, as would a full-scale invasion. That, naturally, left subterfuge or treachery as the means by which they might capture her. To save the world I purposely DIDN'T strengthen my defenses past a certain point, but DID have her trained in various means by which she might make matters difficult for her captors. Slipping out of manacles, sweet talking her guards with promises of reward, or setting them against eachother,... she has even cultivated the most atrocious singing voice and has the vocal stamina of a skilled opera singer. Nothing they won't be able to deal with, but every little bit helps, and hopefully it will tip the balance for you, just as you will for the world... for you are my Feather at the Pivot Point.

I formed your order for the specific purpose of rescuing her, but had intended to give you several hundred of my best troops, and free pick of the armory... unfortunately this day saw more sleeper agents and booby-traps in enchanted items than I could have ever imagined. The sword of the captain of my own body-guard exploded in his hand as soon as he drew it when the alarm sounded. It killed him, and myself as well. The shards prevent revivification, and they are still digging them out of him, having prioritized my own revivification... and, no burning his body to ash to pick them out wouldn't work any better.

Fortunately, I know one... person who I can rely on the incorruptibility of absolutely, and who can probably bring you to the place where the ritual will occur in the nick of time... yes, in the nick of time, despite it being nearly a year before the ritual may be performed. This individual is the airship 'Infinite Winds to the Boundless Horizon', who is... well Vecna has his liches, and Fharlanghn has his favored as well. It's fate is to go where-ever things are most interesting, and it seems to me that 'interesting' should describe your quest most exactly. Beyond that, his resistance to mind-twisting is absolutely unparalleled, and as an impartial observer and decent enough fellow... if not exactly heroic... well, he won't just dump you into a volcano or the like."

((*Crosses his claws and hopes that that intro to the major direction of the campaign will go better than the last time he had the PCs be the 'chosen saviors of the world' in a campaign...*))

[Illven]

What will this captain want? Jillian asks.

If he's supposed to be impartial he'll likely require payment, and a strong contract.

[Smeggedoff]

"huh" replies Varia "Well, I suppose Million-to-one odds DO crop up nine times out of ten. I think we can do interesting my liege"

[DracoDei]

What will this captain want? Jillian asks.

If he's supposed to be impartial he'll likely require payment, and a strong contract.
"Ah, no. You are misunderstanding two important points.

First off it IS the ship, there is no separate 'captain' although I hear it can create wooden constructs to serve various purposes within itself... Also it can be whatever size it needs to from an inch long to several hundred feet... often simultaneously.

As for payment Varia has the right of it. There is little or nothing it desires that your very presence aboard will not provide. It desires to observe interesting things and this mission to rescue my daughter is certain to be interesting. Let us do our best to make it a rousing adventure rather than a tragedy, yes?"

[BilltheCynic]

Greg's eyes bulge out of his head head and a huge smile is plastered across his face.Wait, we get our own airship?!

Greg twirls around, and when he stops he is wearing an eyepatch and a tricorne with a hook on one hand. Forget the massage, let's go sky sailing, ya scurvy dogs!

Oh yeah, and rescue the princess. That's probably important too.

[Illven]

Well then my liege. Can you tell us about her kidnappers capabilities? Anything could be helpful. Jillian requests

[DracoDei]

"A cogent question, but one I'm not certain we have time to go into in any detail. They are called The Order of Twefire Balgaroax, and are mostly composed of spellcasters, on the theory that the more members they have the higher the risk of discovery, but that any member who didn't understand at least the basics of how to perform the ritual that would release him would be much less useful in reviving their cause if most of them were to be captured. At this time my spymaster informs me that they are probably in a phase where they recruit a few very select swordsmen and archers just in case they face a foe with a thing for... I believe it is called an Antimagic Sphere? Anyway, spell that turns off most other magic in a certain radius.

That isn't counting their less in-the-know members, such as most of those in my service who got turned, let alone mere patsies like the common criminals who attacked our fair city this day who, it seems, hearkened to no higher rallying cry than 'if we all attack at once then they won't be able to get many of us, so we will all attack when the crystals break... that way nobody will know too much in advance and thus won't be able to spill the beans'.

Their ranks have included both divine and arcane members, with a tendency towards the more academic sorts since the details of the ritual to revive him are exceedingly complex. Their divine casters are mostly clerics of various evil deities, as Twefire Balgaroax had broken free of whatever deity spawned him long before he was imprisoned, and served as a mercenary for hire in the Bloodwar and other causes.

Some of them have fiendish blood, but only a very few historically. They viewed the actual descendants of Twefire Balgaroax to be entirely too obvious to serve as members, and sought to protect them by excluding them from their ranks. In addition, they saw such advantages as making too greatly for ambition, rather than the long, slow wait that most of their history entailed.

I... my memory fails on one key point... we had originally thought that a majority of the higher-ups had taken the path of undeath, in order to still be around when the opportunity for his return came. We recently discovered that this was probably not the case, with some sort of magical item that allowed longevity at some sort of nuance price. I can't recall the price, only that at the time I thought that it was something that would have been an excellent weak-spot to take advantage of were it not for the prophesy basically guaranteeing that the prime times to do so would be doomed to failure. The exception being that I recalled that it would somehow make rescuing Fer-Elsa easier, provided that they caught no hint more than a few days in advance... or perhaps not even then.

Of course, all of this could be colored by the infiltrators. I can't risk you staying around long enough for me to sort out this mess, and still less could I risk bringing the book that I had all of this written down in. I almost decided to come in my underwear, for fear of some sort of scrying beacon that could penetrate even the ancestral protections on this place being hidden among my clothing or magical devices.

Still, your ride might know a thing or two, if he can be persuaded that the story is most interesting if he tells you more rather than less, and further that misleading you would not add any particular spice.


All that being said, if you can essay some more specific questions I will see what I can recall..."

[ngilop]

Tinac ponders for a moment not really being able to fully understand the whole living airship thing. "So, this flying boat is, alive; sentient and sapient?" He thinks about rescuing a princess and fighting a bunch of evil magic users "so, if we rescue your daughter, then there is no way for this demon to come back.. at least according to this prophecy?"

[DracoDei]

"Yes sentient and sapient.

And I wouldn't say NO way, for one thing the prophecy only concerns her not the means of freeing him in general. Still, they would need to wait for the next time when the stars are right and... Hmmm... I seems to recall... DRAT... without either the notes the scribes put into that book, nor my headband of intellect... I can't quite seem to recall, but I remember thinking that if you could steal the device that grants them immortality... or one of them? For some reason I seem to remember there being more than one. Anyway I remember thinking it would be useless to me but quite useful to my daughter. And since the ritual requires the eldest I seem to recall that she could put quite the spike into their wheels for centuries to come. I also seem to remember some of my best spellcasters getting into a shouting argument with eachother about if that would actually work, but even at the time I never understood the particulars of the spellcraft they were going on about."

[BilltheCynic]

So let me get this straight: if princess dies, these guys would have to wait a couple of centuries for the planets to align right to try it again.

How do we stop them from ever trying to summon their Devil-King again? Some of us intend to still be around for a couple more centuries, and I for one really don't want to have to go through this whole thing again.

[DracoDei]

"Ending the necessary bloodlines would, in theory, do the trick. Alternatively one could summon him, or allow him to be summoned, and then kill him and capture his soul... although the imprisoning of the soul would be the mightiest of magics.

In short, I think that might be getting a bit overly ambitious. Still, if it were to become feasible and worth the risk I'd not object to anyone trying. I think my daughter could even be revivified if he was slain, but not before that if she was sacrificed."

[DracoDei]

You part company, and find yourself in a hallway with many doors. The King goes through one of them, and you all take a different one that he specifies.

You find yourself in a open field where the airships may dock. With no sign of the door you came through. You search around for The Eternal Traveller, and find this person in an out of the way dock. The personage is about 150' feet long in the envelope, which is a circle of about 30' in diameter at its widest point. The gondola (?) is shaped like a boat-hull, a "mere" 80' feet long, with a beam of about 20' at the widest point and a height of 15'. The gondola is in direct contact with the gas-bag, and the overall design suggests great speed.

"Hello, I was told I should be taking on the weight of a Feather." comes the voice, in each of your most native of not only tongues but also dialects.

As soon as the gang-plank rises, the view changes, your ride takes the scenic route in (It is aaalllll about 'The Journey is more important than the destination') and you land in a great city that is very obscure, or more likely entirely unheard of. ((DC 23 Knowledge[Geography] to have even heard of it.))

You are met in mid-air by a rather firm insect-winged guard in full-plate armor. He informs you in no uncertain terms that no entrance to the city will be permitted. This restriction is quickly lifted when The Endless Traveller explains just WHO and WHAT it is.

It turns out that an opera singer of LEGENDARY quality got a bit too full of himself, and started killing off his rivals. The local sultan decreed death and soul-binding to prevent revivification, to great public disapproval at the loss of so great a talent.

In a political move, the King informed the singer's rabid fans* that if they could gather thirty thousand pieces of gold he would allow a single fairwell performance, with the money being devoted to a massive illusion in the sky above the city so that the play could be witnessed by all within the city... that is in one weeks time, and they had to cut off people from entering the city, lest the sewers overflow, and many be crushed to death in the press in the streets.

*Seriously... several of them intentionally infected themselve with rabies with the intention of biting the king when they were granted an audience as an act of violent protest. He ordered them each fined ten times the cost of a Cure Disease spell each, and then to get cured on their own moneys in addition, then to report for flogging.

((We can roleplay any parts of this that you REALLY want to, but the purpose of this stop is to let you do any shopping you want to do, including Identify, selling and buying magical items, etc. after this you will all go to sleep on board The Endless Journey, and wake up at the site of the first major adventure... which I'm having second thoughts about my plans for, and may need to come up with something entirely different for. EDIT: After some discussion in the OOC thread, I've decided to go ahead with my original plan.))

[ngilop]

"I hope a feather is non too heavy for one such as yourself." Tinac says out loud, not really sure if the voice was just in his head or outloud.. or maybe it was both.

Tinac is about to say something to the insect guard and just as he begins to open his mouth the ship in not so blunt terms just what it is about and what is in the best interest of the guard.

[DracoDei]

Earlier:
"As good tale always makes light of a journey I think I shall encounter no difficulty at all."

Later(to the guard):
"I am The Endless Journey, granted this form by the great power of Fharlanghn, my gift for a lifetime of faithful worship. In life never did my road cross itself, for even in my mother's belly was I ever headed towards the horizon, with new vistas before me.

For this reason he now has given me command of every language, rather than a mere paltry score or so, and guides me to wherever new or unique things may be seen. I have witnessed things you people wouldn't believe. Seige golems on fire plumiting off the shoulder of Orion the Titan-Centaur; I watched mountain-cleaver beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will never be lost, in time, like tears in rain. For I shall keep them safe in my memory, just as I trust in the one I serve to keep me safe. I retain the memories of my mortal life, but am freed from my attachments to them.

I have had conversation with tens of thousands of beings, and yet can name only ten individuals and one single race that could pass through the air with as great of swiftness as I have... yet my motions are slow and deliberate, for if one does not stop to smell the roses, and the flame-flowers, and the madness-singing death-violets of the darkest pits of the hells, then what is the point of the journey. You stand now upon my deck, whose touch has brought paralysis to a Solar who took issue with my lack of action when I stood by and allowed three of his siblings to perish, though I could have saved them with ease, though they were being crushed beneath a fiend large enough to swallow whales at a gulp.

I was brought here by the hand of Fharlanghn himself, so whatever reason you might have for denying me and my companions to lay witness to the events that we have been sent to see, I hardly think you should so lightly oppose the will of a god.., wouldn't you say?"

[Illven]

Plus we're on a really important mission! Jillian adds eagerly.

[BilltheCynic]

Yar! Can't ye tell that we're honest, legitimate sailors on important business ta save others?

Greg pauses for a moment, then adds, I probably should have changed out of my pirate outfit before saying that, shouldn't I?

With a twirl, Greg goes back to his normal appearence.

[DracoDei]

The guard keeps a careful eye on Greg, but directs his question to Jillian:
"And what exactly is the nature of this mission?"

[Illven]

The guard keeps a careful eye on Greg, but directs his question to Jillian:
"And what exactly is the nature of this mission?"

Jillian flashes her token of the Knights of the Feather.

Sorry, we're not at liberty to say. She replies.

[r2d2go]

Joseph just stands silently, absentmindedly twirling a stick between his fingers, his levitating guisarmes following suit.

Haven't had much to say, but this is just to say I'm still here, basically :smalltongue:

[DracoDei]

The guard very carefully examines the badge. He seems about to say something when The Endless Journey chimes in.
"Let me guess? You don't recognize that at all?"

The dragonfly-winged guard nods in several directions, uncertain of where to address the Ship.

"Well, we HAVE crossed two or three oceans getting here, so that is hardly surprising. Look, they are with me, and their mission doesn't involve anything that will harm this city. This I swear by the rights of a guest of the Open Road."

"...Oh, and put those things away. He's going to let us through, and you aren't helping. How would YOU feel if someone came to a place you were supposed to be guarding bearing naked steel?"

[BilltheCynic]

Wait, we're supposed to be guarding this place? You just said we were here to lay waste to events! Or was it lay witness to events?

Greg looks around, unsure where exactly to address the ship. He finally decides on the deck beneath him. He points at the floor with an accusatory finger. You know, now would be a really good time for you to tell us exactly where we are, what we're doing here, and what any of this has to do with the mission.

[DracoDei]

"The name of the city is The Floating City, which seems nonseniscal, until you realize that without some fairly tricky architectural and magical methods, the whole thing would end up sinking a few feet into the sand every time there is an earthquake. As it is the city actually moves UPWARDS against any sand that the winds have caused to accumulate every time they get a little tremor.

As for what we are doing here, and what it has to do with the mission, I have no idea. My god sends me places, he doesn't tell me WHY. The 'why' is part of the joy of discovery!"

[ngilop]

"we are here because of the great journey, that's pretty obvious, what happens though is a mystery to us all, we better make the best of it. And maybe we should go see that singer..?" Tinac says to nobody in particular.

[Illven]

We should also go to a potion shop and get these appraised. Jillian added holding up two of the magical potions.

Anyone wanna come with?

[DracoDei]

A tiny porcelain bowl full of caviar appears in Jillian's hand.

"Just for the record, I can conjure food, and several other things... sorta an 'expense account' for my travels if you will..."

[BilltheCynic]

Greg's hand shoots up. Oh, I want to go! I want to identify this nifty belt and cloak. The potion guy can do that, right? Well, if he can't I'm sure we can find someone else who can tell us what's so special about them.

Greg is taking the magical belt from the first fight and the cloak from that guy with the nasty dagger. He is also taking that dagger, see if he can find anyone who can tell him more about it. He hands them to Jillian, because he's too lazy to carry them himself.

[DracoDei]

The guard waves you through.

The thing that I had in a spoiler about a tiny porcelain bowl of caviar appearing in Jillian's hand happens.

Greg fails to find anything magical about the dagger.

The people going to the magic shop arrive there.

You all know the basics about the opera singer's final performance now...

[Illven]

Oh awesome! Jillian said already with a mouth full of food.

I've never had this before.... What is it? Some Elven dish? She asks her comrades as they enter the potion shop.


Good morning! [Use appropriate of sir or madam.] I have several potions that need to be identified! She calls out looking around for an owner or employee if none are apparent.

[DracoDei]

"That will be 111 gold pieces each if you want it with a certificate, or 5 GP each if you just want my best guess... if I don't know, I won't charge you."

[Illven]

"That will be 111 gold pieces each if you want it with a certificate, or 5 GP each if you just want my best guess... if I don't know, I won't charge you."

What institute backs the certificate? Jillian asked.

[DracoDei]

What institute backs the certificate? Jillian asked.
"Me. Your's truly. If it doesn't do what I say it does, and there isn't some tricky magic on it to make it read wrong, then I'm in serious trouble. So, depending on how you look at it, it is backed by the city guard who will come throw me in the clink or cut out my tongue or something if I didn't cast the spell like I said I would. I never worried too much about the penalty because I'm never going to run afoul of it, so what do I care?"

((Clarification in case you missed it: 111 GP is for a casting of Identify, 5 GP is for a Spellcraft check that you don't pay if he doesn't succeed.))

[Illven]

We'll take the five. Jillian asked putting four potions on the counter.

Any chance for a group discount? She asks hopefully.

[DracoDei]

The man eyes the potions with some confusion...

He licks his lips slowly, then glances at your Bracers of Protection. He seems to be fighting with himself internally.

He removes the corks from each potion in turn, swirling them, then giving each a sniff, then recorks them before moving on to the next one.

"Well, don't quote me on this, but I'd hazard a guess they all do the same thing. So yeah, 5 GP for one of them, which, at this point would be the same as for all of them."

[Illven]

The man eyes the potions with some confusion...

He licks his lips slowly, then glances at your Bracers of Protection. He seems to be fighting with himself internally.

He removes the corks from each potion in turn, swirling them, then giving each a sniff, then recorks them before moving on to the next one.

"Well, don't quote me on this, but I'd hazard a guess they all do the same thing. So yeah, 5 GP for one of them, which, at this point would be the same as for all of them."

Thank you sir! Jillian said brightly.

What do you think they are? She asks.

[DracoDei]

He takes a drop from one of them and puts it on a piece of alchemical paper. Then sniffs the rest carefully, and performs other examinations.

"I... actually have no idea. Strange, because I'm sure it seems a little familiar, but I'm sure it isn't one of the common ones, or even the not-quite-so-common-ones yet I keep coming back to the lists of those I have memorized. Should I try the spell?"

((Okay, before you go any further, I really suggest you do some re-reading of this thread. Starting with the fight where you acquired these potions.))

[BilltheCynic]

Greg snaps his fingers (how it made a sound is anyone's guess). Hey, can you identify stuff other than potions? We looted a really nifty belt and cloak off of a guy we killed and we don't know what they do. Don't worry, that guy was really, really obnoxious. Oh, and really evil. And sexist. And he ate puppies. To be honest, we did the world a favor, and the lawn gnomes of the planet owe us a deeper debt than they will ever know.

Greg pauses for a second, realizing he got sidetracked. Uh, what was I talking about again? Oh right, cloak and belt. We would really like to get those identified. Hopefully, they'll help us beat that guy when he inevitably rises from the grave and hunts us down to exact bloody vengeance on all of us.

Greg leans over to Jillian and whispers (loud enough for the shopkeeper to hear), Arch-nemesi have such an annoying habit of rising from the dead.

[DracoDei]

The mage stares at Greg oddly (no new experience for Greg...) but then shakes himself out of it.

"Yes, naturally... although that requires the spell, rather than just a knowledge of spellcraft... so a hundred and eleven gold pieces."

[BilltheCynic]

111 gold pieces for the belt and the cloak? You mean we're getting a two-for-one deal? Sweet!

(After inevitably being told that it's 111 gp each)

Greg is outraged. What? But I asked you to identify both of them, and you said only 111 gold pieces. This is deceptive advertising! You'll hear from my lawyer about this. Well, you would if my lawyer was here...and still worked for me...and hadn't run off screaming the last time I asked him to represent me, I mean sheesh, he'd already represented me the last six times I threw a pie in that barons face, why should the seventh have been any different. Ok, so it was a cherry pie and the baron was deathly allergic to cherries, but that would have never happened in the first place if the baron had lightened up after one of the first six, and I was responsible enough to pay for his resurrection. What was I talking about again? Oh right, the false advertising. On second thought, I'll just pay the extra gold.

Greg grabs the belt and cloak from Jillian and hands it to the mage. He then pulls out a small wallet from him 'body pocket', opens it, and turn it upside down. Far too many coins than should be possible pour out of the wallet until there are 222 of them lying in a pile at the mage's feet.

[DracoDei]

((2 hours of spellcasting later...))
"Well, the dagger doesn't appear to be magical at all actually... sorry?

As for the cloak, it appears to conjure spectral flames once per day for up to 5 minutes, and it can be quenched. The flames can't actually burn anything, or even keep you warm. The effect is known as Fairie Fire if that tells you anything. Oddly enough it is usually something used on an enemy, but I can't fault the idea of wanting to wear a cloak covered in small tongues of flames that move about it. Seems like it would be rather an... well, I'm a mage, not a poet, so I'll just say 'impressive' rather than looking for a better word.

Anyway, it is activated by making a flourish with any normal dagger... I mean not one of those weird punching daggers. Anyway, it goes like so..."

He demonstrates repeatedly with a steak-knife until you all can reproduce the action... it is rather threatening looking.

"To turn it off just say 'I'm outta here' in either Common or Orcish."

He points out the part of the certificate where he phonetically wrote out the orcish phrase.


As for the belt... let's call it The Belt of the Wise Berserker much more easy to activate if one happens to be in a true battle-rage... you actually might have to slow down a bit and loose tempo on your movement, or, if you are particularly skilled or a user of two blades, your bladework if you aren't in such a battle-rage. ((Translation: Swift Action to activate if Raging, Move Action otherwise)). Heals a bit slower than the potions ((2/round... except that might be what I had the potion doing anyway? We will say the potions do 3/round)), and only lasts half a minute. Takes a full week to build up a charge again after each use, and can only hold one charge.

He likewise gives both of the activation phrases in the certificate for this one.

"Anything else today?"

[ngilop]

Meanwhile Tinac meanders about town, ready to meet up with the rest of the group at the predetermined time and place. He has never been in a city this large before, especially with a widely famous singer, and super especially on a deity created living air ship that tells flying bug guards to, well bugger off. He cannot help but let out a small laugh at that last thought.

[BilltheCynic]

Pfft, punching daggers. The weapon of choice for hipster assassins, not us normal adventurers. Well, if my halfling friend here is done with those priest-in-a-bottles, I think we'll head out.

[DracoDei]

The streets around Tinac are CROWDED. The smell of sweaty bodies from the harsh sun is intense, and the faces of anyone not richly dressed are likely to be worn with exhaustion.

(Sorta like a Con, but with less on-going entertainment... if that helps?)

[ngilop]

Tinac goes up to a random shop and looks over the wares, but politely refuses a purchase, as his funds are low, but that he will be back when the payment for a job comes in.

[Illven]

Jillian is racking up quite a bill in impulsive snack buys.

Anyone want some? She asks brightly.

[BilltheCynic]

Jillian is racking up quite a bill in impulsive snack buys.

Anyone want some? She asks brightly.

Greg holds up his hand. I can't eat that stuff. It just goes right through me.

Greg pauses for a second, then says, I'm sorry. That was bad even by my standards.

[DracoDei]

The performance was... magnificent, breath-taking, soul-inspiring, legendary.

You all take a full three days to just bask in the memory, absorbing it and considering the philosophical implications of such a thing.

But... it is time to go now. The Endless Journey has pointed out that for all it knows the next place you all end up could be under water or some such. As such you are all standing in the forward observation blister when the teleportation happens.

"Well, we are still on the prime material plane... huh, doesn't look like much. I THINK I know where we are, but I want to be sure before I say anything beyond that interesting things have likely come to this place, rather than it being interesting in and of itself."

You concur with its assessment. You see a perfectly ordinary looking town, wrapped in a thick blanket of snow on the ground, with mountains in the distance. As you come closer you see crude fortifications have been thrown across some of the streets... and then the arrows start coming in!

The Endless Journey slams its shutters shut to protect the glass. You can hear it shouting down to the archers below. "Hold! For I mean no harm to anyone! I will side with whoever shall tell me the most interesting side of the story that is no doubt playing out in these parts, if their heart be not TOO black! Parlay! Parlay! Parlay in the name of Fharlanghn! Parlay in the name of Fharlanghn!!!"

The arrows continue to bounce off the hull.

It speaks to you: "Well, I'm sure they heard me.... you would all have been quite deafened I think if I hadn't have hardened my hull against the sound. They can't hear me now either... the window wouldn't even take a scratch against the arrows they are using... mostly mundane, with only a few magical mixed in. I'm not going to back down until I get an answer, but it is your choice if you want the shutters open or shut."

((Y'all can specify additional details you would like to have, but please include a Spot check with each. Other than that feel free to take any actions you like at this time!))

[Illven]

Why are they firing at travelers! Jillian exclaimed.

We come in peace after all.


Spot [roll0]

[BilltheCynic]

Wait, you don't even know where you're teleporting us? What kind of a stupid, sentient, flying, teleporting, magical airship blessed by the gods are you? You can't even get a bunch of dudes with bows to listen to you-

Greg pauses as a thought strikes him. It was fairly painful, but he endured.

Maybe those guys really are deaf. What if that entire town is full of fairly strong ungood people that a planatar just decided to troll with holy words or something.

A sudden look of alarm flashes across Greg's face. You say those guy's arrows couldn't get through that shield. What, exactly, could get through it? Could I get through it? Or wait, if there is some sort of block against incorporeal stuff, could you lower the block without lowering the physical shield? And do you know if any of those arrows are ghost touch?

[roll0]

[DracoDei]

Why are they firing at travelers! Jillian exclaimed.

We come in peace after all.


Spot [roll0]

"Why are they firing at travelers?" isn't something that would generally be answered by a spot check I don't think. Of course, with that roll, you didn't see anything informative anyway.

Wait, you don't even know where you're teleporting us? What kind of a stupid, sentient, flying, teleporting, magical airship blessed by the gods are you? You can't even get a bunch of dudes with bows to listen to you-
"The teleportation you are referring to is about finding new things. Hardly any fun if I know exactly what I'm getting into now is it? So, as part of Fharlanghn's blessing, yes, I have no idea where it will take me. I can't even control when it happens per se, although I can usually tell enough in advance to not be too inconvenienced." it says with a superior tone.

"As for getting them to stop shooting at me, give me a few minutes before you start casting aspersions on my diplomatic skills. It isn't like I'm an enchanter or anything like that."

Greg pauses as a thought strikes him. It was fairly painful, but he endured.

Maybe those guys really are deaf. What if that entire town is full of fairly strong ungood people that a planatar just decided to troll with holy words or something.

A sudden look of alarm flashes across Greg's face. You say those guy's arrows couldn't get through that shield. What, exactly, could get through it? Could I get through it? Or wait, if there is some sort of block against incorporeal stuff, could you lower the block without lowering the physical shield? And do you know if any of those arrows are ghost touch?

[roll0]
"I can control which parts of myself are permeable to ethereal beings at any given time. Currently the shutters are permeable, as is most of my structure.

Also, they seem to be shouting to eachother to coordinate well enough, so I doubt they are deaf."
See above, except maybe for the statement about the roll.

[ngilop]

Tinac has no idea why they are being attacked, especially considering that something major indeed, just happened at this town or whatever. He tries to see if he can notice anything and tries to yell down to the people to stop their volleys "Hey we are friends here, just travelers passing through, It ok, we know you are scared and ready to pounce, but you needn't assault us or this lovely ship"

spot:[roll0]

Diplomacy:[roll1]

[DracoDei]

You see a very tall mound of ashes from a... funeral pyre? Somehow the phrase 'funeral pyre' seems both correct and incorrect here, but you can't quite tell how. Nearby you ALSO see some cook-fires dug into the ground on which whole cows are in the process of being roasted.

"Just a sec, let me set up the spell so they can hear you..." says The Endless Journey.

You repeat yourself, and the arrows actually have in number for about half a minute, then resume full strength.

"They are telling me that if I am trustworthy, I should turn away and never return... of course I'm not going to go for that!" the Ship says.

[Illven]

Why would we leave!? Jillian called down to the archers, cupping her hands around her mouth to direct her voice downwards.

What harm have travelers caused you in the past? She asked hoping to find out why they were so edgy.

[DracoDei]

"Ugh... don't bother shouting, and TELL me before you start talking. I can amplify your voice nicer than you can shout, in both volume and tone." explains The Endless Journey.

You repeat yourself and The Endless Journey reports that they are saying something about the town being cursed such that EVERY traveler is hostile now.

"Hmmm... now that IS interesting... either politics or..."

((It is about to say something to the people below, but I'm going to give y'all, especially BilltheCynic's character, a chance to act before y'all close to within 240 feet and the next exchange happens between The Endless Journey and the people below.))

[BilltheCynic]

Greg floats to the side of the ship. Well, I guess it's up to me to solve this. I am after all the only one here with the focus and determination to oh my gods look at all that ash! Did they just have a mass book burning? Or maybe they found a bunch of women who weighed as much as a duck. What was I talking about again? Oh right, focus and determination. Hey ship, I want to send them a message.

Greg clears his throat. Ahem. Attention William Tell wannabes: would you mind explaining who all travelers are cursed and why you are shooting at us? We won't hurt you unless you force us, but we are the heroes of this story, so we can't just move on from a town full of people shooting at us and a giant mound of ash in the middle of it without knowing what the cuss is going on there. If you stop shooting at us, we will take that as a sign that you are ok with us landing and talking to you like civilized people. If you keep shooting, we will take that as a sign that you would prefer us to stay back while you send a representative to explain things to us. We'll understand, and even arrange for the transportation. Ok ship, end message.

Greg turns back to the others. Ok, I'm pretty sure these guys will keep trying to turn us into living and undead pincushions, so here's my plan: Ship, if they don't explain themselves or turn peaceable in about a minute, please relay the message, "Alright, representative it is. Engaging tractor beam." I'll then use my spoooky ghost powers to grab a particularly cowardly looking guy from the bunch and bring him up here for answers. Ship, when I get the guy twenty five feet off of the ground, please send the message, "We don't want to hurt you representative, but if you keep fighting our transportation we may lose our hold on you. Before you resist our transportation device any further, look down." Now, these guys are already trying to kill us, so I don't think we'll hurt our relations any by kidnapping one of their guys, and this way we can actually get some answers about what's going on.

If the guys don't give us a good answer, keep shooting, and no one else objects, when we get within 240 ft Greg will look for a scared-looking guy and use telekinesis: sustained force on him. I'll be able to lift the guy 20 feet per round for twelve rounds. The Will save to resist is 17 (10 + 1/2 Greg's HD + CHA). I'm going to guess the guy will stop resisting after we get him high enough. If the guy resists, I'll try it again if able, and if he resists again I'll try a third time if able.

If he resists the first time, I'll be able to us TK again in [roll0] rounds.

If he resists the first time, I'll be able to us TK again in [roll1] rounds.

Spot check, trying to find one that looks particularly scared or nervous: [roll2]

[DracoDei]

The shooting continues.

[ngilop]

"well there seems to be a large.. umm.. funeral pyre down below, and they are also roasted whole cows in fire pits... I'm not quit sure what is going on down there, but something is happening. Also no wonder why every visitor is hostile, these fools keep shooting arrows at them!" Tinac wipes his forehead and shrugs.

[DracoDei]

Nobody replies to the comment about the funeral pyre, and soon one of the archers is dragged aboard. It takes some time to calm him down. Even The Endless Journey's very well-chosen words prove less effective than you would all expect initially. Eventually however the fact that you persist in not brutally maiming the archer seems to get through to him. He seems to be expecting you to do so at any moment, and The Endless Journey seems unsurprised by this after a slip of the tongue on the archer's part regarding "that sphere"... but no further details are forthcoming until after you have landed (to more arrow fire) and released the archer (more arrows come in through the door as it opens, one even nicking the archer, but none of you are in the entry-room at that time.

After that things seem to take a positive turn, although it takes about two hours (with strangely little dialogue) before the tension has died down enough for y'all to exit The Endless Journey.

[Illven]

There. Now that you know we're not hostile, perhaps we can sit down, have lunch and talk this over. Jillian suggested hopefully.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg beams. Ha! Exactly as I planned! And they barely want to kill us any more than they did before!

Greg pauses for a second, then adds, Why did they want to kill us so badly if what they're afraid of is a ball? We don't look too much like balls, do we?

[DracoDei]

An exhausted looking man in fine clothing (although it looks like his clothing hasn't been washed lately) approaches.

"I am, Mordecci the mayor of this town. Pleased to meet you all. I must apologize for the hostility, but for more than the past week, every single traveler to come to town has attacked us. Including merchants we have known for decades. This town is cursed. We are well happy to see such mighty persons as yourselves, and beg you not to bring your terrible vengeance upon us. I would seek to negotiate for your protection, but... well, things are so bad that I think we might be better served to beg passage away from this place. We know the source of this curse you see, even if we have been unable to break it. It would not travel with us."

((Feel free to insert comments here, but they aren't really going to change what happens next.))


The Endless Journey: "Let me guess, a sphere, covered in sigils, probably recovered from the first of the attackers?"

Mordecci: "Why yes!"

The Endless Journey: "Describe it if you would?"

Mordecci: "About 2 feet in diameter. Seems to be steel, but as every inch of it weeps blood continuously, it is hard to be sure."
Mordecci's face from now until end of description, if not longer: :smalleek:
Mordecci: "Seems to be incised with pictures of a battle, but again, hard to tell under all the blood..."

The Endless Journey: "Right, as I thought. I'll take a look, but I think that the only thing worse than taking it far from this place would be to leave it behind. If you will give it to me I can do the first step of destroying it, although I can't really help as much with the later step or steps. I'm sorry to say that the curse on it would travel with you if you tried to leave, so for reasons of conscience, if nothing else, I'm not going to be transporting anyone away from here until the matter is dealt with. As for your debt for shooting at me, we will discuss that later..."

[DracoDei]

((I ended up rolling Tinac's Knowledge[Religion]... Not-A-Spoiler-Any-More: That and Spellcraft are the two most applicable skills.))

He got a Natural 20 which gives a 32, so I'm actually going to be somewhat generous with the information here...

It is a minor artifact of Erythnul. It is far from unique in all history, but they are rare enough that it is at least somewhat plausible that this could be the only one in existence at this time. The attack that started out this whole mess was almost certainly the final step of the rite to enchant it. It can not be destroyed by normal means. You would need Disjunction to even have a chance of brute-forcing it. There is a specific procedure for destroying one, but all you can remember is "Don't fight it, go with it... then just smash the thing!".

One of the more difficult parts of creating it is that the attack that sanctifies (anti-sanctifies?) it must have at least 5 levels and/or HD worth of LAWFUL Evil individuals knowingly participating in it of their own free will for the purpose of said (anti-?)sanctification, despite Erythnul being a CHAOTIC Evil God.

It brings endless violence for tens or hundreds of miles around (depending on the exact quality of the rituals that created the specific instance). Even death brings no peace, for the dead rise as undead to continue the violence. Almost nothing is immune to its effects. Animals, undead, deathless, Good Aligned Outsiders, perhaps even intelligent full-constructs(Warforged and other Living Constructs are definitely susceptible)... all can fall prey to it. This point is emphasized and re-emphasized in what you learned of it. It is mentioned that a strong will can provide some resistance to it, and that resilience of body is useful against some of the secondary effects. There was one other thing that provided some resistance to it... but the person who instructed you specifically avoided telling you what it was. She only said that you would sleep better not knowing what it was, but that it was only a temporary shield, that would be worn away with the passage of time. She said if the time ever came where you needed to know, it would probably become obvious.

PHB-level information on that god:
The god of slaughter, Erythnul, is chaotic evil. His title is the Many. Erythnul delights in panic and slaughter. In civilized lands, his followers (including evil fighters, barbarians, and rogues) form small, criminal cults. In savage lands, evil barbarians, gnolls, bugbears, ogres, and trolls commonly worship him.

The domains he is associated with are Chaos, Evil, Trickery, and War. His favored weapon is a morningstar with a blunt stone head.

The priesthood of Erythnul maintains a low profile in most civilized lands. In savage areas, members of the priesthood are known as bullies and murderous tyrants. Many evil humanoids worship Erythnul, but their priests do not cooperate with each other to advance the overall goals of the religion. Clerics of Erythnul favor rust-red garments or blood-stained robes.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg's jaw drops to the ground as he finds out about the artifact. After a moment, he regains what little composure he has.

Whelp, that nixes my "Beholder domination" theory. I wonder if ole' Erythnul would allow an insanity defense against psychotic violence. Probably not, that jerk. I wonder what the temporary defense against that thing is. Probably sacrificing a dozen virgins or something like that. Hmm. Hey ship, you seem like you know a bit about this thing. Do you have any idea how to avoid going psycho or where to start looking? And how long does it take to get the psycho-mace fully operational?

[DracoDei]

"I'm almost certain it is 'fully operational' in the magical sense right now. If you bring it to me I can verify that.

As for avoiding psychosis, I would say that those of you I brought with me should have little to fear from that. Saying more than that would make the story being played out here much less interesting I think, and that is one of the few things I really can't do.

I know how to destroy the thing but, again, I'm going to have to be a bit parsimonious with my information. I'll just say again that the best first step would be to give it to me.

There is one more thing I can do to help, but I'm not quite sure that everyone present is quite desperate enough to do the only appropriate thing."

[BilltheCynic]

Greg's eye twitches. You...you're deliberately withholding information that could help us destroy the evil artifact...just to keep things interesting?!

Greg takes in a deep breath, then salutes the Endless Journey. My respect for you has just risen tenfold, good ship. At last, someone else who understands the tragedy of a boring adventure. Of course, we can't have this interesting adventure if we don't know where to look, so...could you help us on that one?

[Illven]

"I'm almost certain it is 'fully operational' in the magical sense right now. If you bring it to me I can verify that.

As for avoiding psychosis, I would say that those of you I brought with me should have little to fear from that. Saying more than that would make the story being played out here much less interesting I think, and that is one of the few things I really can't do.

I know how to destroy the thing but, again, I'm going to have to be a bit parsimonious with my information. I'll just say again that the best first step would be to give it to me.

There is one more thing I can do to help, but I'm not quite sure that everyone present is quite desperate enough to do the only appropriate thing."

Jillian turns to the mayor.

Certainly you know where the artifact is, correct Mordecci? She asks the man looking up at the much taller then her mayor.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg uses his masterful deductive reasoning to solve this conundrum. Hmm, where is the sphere? Well, we know we are after a really dangerous sphere, and everyone knows the most dangerous spheres are beholders. Beholders are often known as the Eye Tyrants. I. But wait, only one stat begins with I, intelligence. Intelligence is often abbreviated Int. We already have I, so this gives us N and T. Every adventurer has to have an Int score. Have zero intelligence disqualifies you. Zero is sometimes shortened to O. Intelligence is used for skill points; higher intelligence means more skill points. The maxed non-epic level is 20, and the maxed ranks in a skill at level 20 is 23. The 23 letter of the alphabet is W. Of course, most adventurers never get to level 20. Never. N.

Greg gasps suddenly, then flies over to Jillian and whispers The sphere is in town.

[DracoDei]

Experimenting with some fonts to denote the NPCs. Might not keep these specific ones past this specific post. Tell me what you think.

"Mr Samuels has it. He's our smith you see. We thought if we got it hot enough it might destroy it. Fire cleanses and all that. We're still keeping someone on the bellows continuously, thought that maybe if we kept it up long enough." says Mordecci, pointing towards the building in question. Smoke is indeed pouring from the chimney in great quantities, and you can see someone in hide armor with a shield on one arm and a sheathed longsword guarding the entrance.

"That was a very reasonable attempt, but flame won't help at this time. It is winter, save your fuel. After I've done my part, flame wouldn't be a terrible idea, but there will probably be better ones.

Hmmm... I don't suppose you tried immersing it in holy water?" asks The Endless Journey.

"Well, not immersing, but we did make up several gallons before we ran out of silver coin and things that weren't especially precious to us for one reason or another. Two big batches we made. The first we used trying to wash the blood off of every part of it simultaneously. We were thinking of quenching it in the water if we decided we couldn't risk using flame any longer... like if... well, if the tactical situation got bad enough. We've got the water from both batches sitting next to the forge in two tubs. We were going to roll it into the fresh one. If that didn't work we were going to dump the bloody stuff on top, and hope it wasn't tainted too badly to do some good."

"I'm actually curious if it is even warm. Slight variations of the rituals to create it would produce different results.

As for the holy water, I wouldn't recommend using that on the sphere. It could maybe work when the proper time comes, but you probably have better options. I can have a look at the bloody stuff, give you an analysis on if it is still any good.

Speaking of my curiosity, if the bodies of the cultists are reasonably intact I might be able to get some information out of them, assuming your local user of divine power lacks that particular ability or has been using his or her powers for other things?"

[BilltheCynic]

Hey ship, would punching the ball really, really hard destroy it? Cause I can punch it really hard.

Greg turns to the mayor. Also, how exactly did you guys get that thing?

[Illven]

Hey ship, would punching the ball really, really hard destroy it? Cause I can punch it really hard.

Greg turns to the mayor. Also, how exactly did you guys get that thing?

Jillian rolls her eyes.

Punching the artifacts never work, you have to always undertake some epic journey first. Jillian replied hands on hip.

[BilltheCynic]

Jillian rolls her eyes.

Punching the artifacts never work, you have to always undertake some epic journey first. Jillian replied hands on hip.

Hey, I already took an epic journey, during which I demonstrated that I learned to punch things really hard. Like, I-can-punch-through-adamantine hard. According to Chekhov (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ChekhovsSkill), that makes this a perfectly viable tactic.

[DracoDei]

"My only comment on the subject of punching it is that the best way to make progress towards destroying it is to give it to me. You don't actually have to but it would be the best solution." says The Endless Journey.

[BilltheCynic]

Let me get this straight: the artifact is in town, kept by people who are trying to break it. All we have to do is bring it to you, and you can destroy it.

This is going to be way, way harder than it sounds, isn't it?

[DracoDei]

"Oh, I doubt I can destroy it on my own. I just happen to be the best choice for carrying out the first step. And yes, it is going to be pretty difficult, that's how artifacts of this caliber tend to be."

[Illven]

"Oh, I doubt I can destroy it on my own. I just happen to be the best choice for carrying out the first step. And yes, it is going to be pretty difficult, that's how artifacts of this caliber tend to be."

Yay! We're going to go to a metaphorical Mt.Doom! Jillian said clapping her hands.

[DracoDei]

"Very metaphorical. We all need to stay in the general vicinity, probably even me, and that is saying something. As I said, this is going to stay with us. The exact details of how to stop it vary depending on which variant of this the artifact is, but all of them require destroying the sphere. Running only means more people die before this is all over, almost certainly including those who run."

[DracoDei]

Mordecci chimes in:
"If I might get a word in edgewise? There was this extended family, came to town about six years ago. Three branches of it called themselves the McCabes, Summersets, and Baguvs. Seemed pretty well to do, cleared out some land and pretty soon they had a group of farms outside town. Well, it turned out they weren't so much a family as a cult. They attacked the town and we would have been done for if that Paladin hadn't been coming through, just sorta making sure that no evil dragons were holding the town in their thrall or what-not, you know, just checking in every so often. I guess they must have figured he was on to them, or we just got lucky. They came into town with that thing in the back of an ox-cart, and just started killing everyone they came to. They got the paladin too, but not before he took out half of them. The militia finished the rest off, although not without losses. The oxen killed three good folk, despite being still yoked to the cart."

The Endless Journey responds:
"Believe me, I want aaaaallll the details*, but right now we are discussing how to resolve the situation. As somewhat relevant to that, and to avoid a boring distraction from the tale, I should explain that they probably didn't think the paladin was on to them, they almost certainly intentionally attacked when a strong foe of diametrically opposed alignment to most of them would be in town so as to have a fierce enough battle to complete the creation of the sphere."

*This seems to all of you to be completely sincere, not sarcasm.

Mordecci:
"Oh, I see... well, in any case, we would never have been able to defend ourselves against what came after if it weren't for the gear we salvaged from the cultists."

The Endless Journey:
"Have you killed all your farm-animals yet?"

Mordecci:
"Well, all we could reach. Probably several still wandering around the outer pastures. Oh! This might be important. The one thing the madness doesn't seem to have touched were some of the cats and some of the dogs."

The Endless Journey:
"I'd tentatively suggest killing the rest of the cats too, but I'll have to know a bit more about the specifics of your situation before I can be sure. The larger dogs you should keep alive, but probably not the smaller ones.

I could conjure some salt and tanning supplies to help you salvage what you can. More arrows too if you need them, or just goose feathers and fletching glue. You can probably find some plow-shares to make into arrow-heads, and you probably can spare the wood for arrow shafts. Of course, you would have to meet my price..."

Mordecci:
"We have copper and gold enough for some of that..." says Mordecci, a little confused by this somewhat mercenary turn from the ship.

The Endless Journey:
"Oh, no, you misunderstand. I hardly have need of either of those. I can conjure a bit of those at need. No, I'm thinking something a bit more... Grim(m)... that is with both one em and two. Bedtime stories come to life.

But I think we had best get all other matters settled first.

Might I offer you a ride over to the Smithy?"

[ngilop]

Tinac is in deep thought within himself for several long moments before he speaks again. "So we need to get that sphere and then give it to the endless journey as the first step in destroying it, what pre-ell is the second step?" Tinac looks at the mayor as he tells of the 'family' that came to the village then brought the orb in on ox cart "well I have to admit killing little puppies and kittens is a bit harsh and not something I ever saw myself doing, but if it must be done, then it must be done."

[BilltheCynic]

Greg smiles sympathetically at Tinac. Aw, don't feel too bad. I'm pretty sure all cats have an evil alignment anyway. Hey ship, what do you want all that money for? You going to buy a bunch of black onyx and zombify the livestock? If so...that would actually be pretty cool.

Hey Mordy, you're the mayor of...uh...what's this town's name again?

~Assuming he's told the town's name~

Greg gasps. *Gasp* Beige River? I've heard of this place! It's got that really nice thing, the thing that attracts lots of people, that's really amazing, that thing that...I can't quite remember what it is. But I hear it's really nice. Of course, you've gotta be prepared for lousy lodging to experience it, since the inn only has one guest room for some reason. Hey, why doesn't this town have much guest lodging? What is that super cool thing that attracts people here? And what was I talking about again?

Oh right, you're the mayor of this town, so you should know what's generally going on. So what is that big funeral pyre thingy about?

[DracoDei]

The Endless Journey:
"One thing at a time... I have my reasons for that, and they will do you no harm.

As for puppies and kittens... hmm... interesting point. Keeping a few puppies, just old enough to be weened alive could have benefits. I'll have to think about it."

Mayor:
"The view from one of the bluffs is very nice on some mornings. Got a few fancy painters who come by. Maybe one every few years. But we are sorta out of the way, and on the way to no-where. Only one road in or out of town. Probably why those cultists set up here.

The pyre is for burning the dead, both friend and foe, thinking and animal. We already lost dear old Granny Alberts to when she was trying to get a clean shirt onto her youngest son, Big Albert, so we could send him off proper. Died a hero he did. Her... well, she was a good woman, and certainly didn't deserve to be strangled to death by kinfolk returned badly from beyond the grave. Long story short, no waiting for full rites any more. We even char the bones of the food-stock we've had to kill and cook. Err... what I mean is, the order we've found works best is kill, cook, debone, break the bones, then burn the broken bones on the pyre."

The Endless Journey:
"When it comes to the meat, make sure you allow no two pieces of meat to touch, use long stripes, nothing like a cube in proportions, and make sure each piece lays flat. Same goes for every internal organ you might want to eat, cut it up fine, although you don't need to be careful about the shapes or lay-outs. Smash the eyes too, just to be on the safe side, and burn the skulls especially well."

[Illven]

The Endless Journey:
"When it comes to the meat, make sure you allow no two pieces of meat to touch, use long stripes, nothing like a cube in proportions, and make sure each piece lays flat. Same goes for every internal organ you might want to eat, cut it up fine, although you don't need to be careful about the shapes or lay-outs. Smash the eyes too, just to be on the safe side, and burn the skulls especially well."

What happens if two pieces of meat touch? Jillian asks curious.

[DracoDei]

"I'll be glad enough to tell you after the danger is past. For now, simply consider what my intended role is in all of this when you ponder the answer to that question."

[BilltheCynic]

Greg raises his hand. Question: does the meat touching thingy apply to living meat too, or living and dead meat, or living and undead meat, or two undead meat, or dead meat and undead meat, or two undead meat? Not that I have to worry about it too much, but my more meaty companions might want to know.

Well, if no one else has any questions, what say we get that psycho sphere thing?

[DracoDei]

"Living and undead pieces of meat wouldn't count."

[DracoDei]

Y'all get the sphere... it isn't even warm to the touch from its days in the forge-fire.

(Load it, or do you have questions about the sphere first?)

[Illven]

I'm good to load it, and move on.

[ngilop]

Tinac helps Jillian load the sphere onto the endless journey.

[DracoDei]

Several wooden "puppets", equal to humans in size, who handle small chores around the ship, sharing a small fragment of its consciousness aid you in loading the sphere.

((Yes, those have been there all along, I just didn't mention them before. They can't go very far from the ship, but they are sort of important...))

The puppets wipe away the blood from a few parts of the sphere.

"Hmmm... yes." says the ship, its voice coming from everywhere in the structure at once (as usual). "Pretty much as I thought. I can get started on destroying it. But... there are a few more things. I'll have to ask you to debark."

When you have done so, along with all your gear, the ramp closes upwards, sealing the hull with a certain air of gravitas and finality.

"Two major things: First off, while it primarily dedicated to Erythnul, there are also symbols of The Clown Prince on that sphere. He's a minor deity with some on again off again ties to Erythnul. He's actually a pretty funny guy some of the time, but unfortunately he considers such things as poisons that leave a forced smile on the face despite the agonizing deaths they cause to be funny. The point is, you may get some things that are rather up Greg's alley mixed in with the other threats.

And now... I'm afraid I must request that I be given every human in the town under the age of 7, every Elf under the age of 55, every dwarf and gnome under the age of 20, and so forth. Call it a Pied Piper or Rumpelstiltzkin sort of thing. I assure you they will come to no lasting harm that would not also befall them if they were to remain with you.**. Understand also that this is a separate issue from the aid I've already said I will provide, and indeed its effects will be limited to the contents of a single box I shall provide whose contents should prove very much worth the trade if you go through with it. Oh, and it would quite even the scales for shooting at me as well. Discuss it among yourselves and then get back to me... don't wait too long though."

The townsfolk are stunned into silence for the moment at the surreal nature of this request.

*((Thanks to BilltheCynic for providing these numbers.))

**((Stuff in different font is the part I've edited because I remembered something.))

[BilltheCynic]

The Clown Prince?! That guy has spawned more coulrophobes than anyone else alive! Hilarious, but his infamy has lead to the systemic oppression of clowns, jesters, and mimes the world over! A true tragedy...well, except for the mime part. If this mission will advance his plans, it is our duty as defenders of non-evil comedy to stop him.

Greg turns to the Endless Journey. I have no idea why you want to abduct a lot of children, but as long as it will keep them safe from the Clown Prince and we won't later have to bring out a doll and ask them to point to where the ship touched them, I don't have too much of a problem with it. Just tell us where we need to go.

[Illven]

Why does some piper want us to rescue children? Jillian asks clearly confused.

[DracoDei]

The Clown Prince?! That guy has spawned more coulrophobes than anyone else alive! Hilarious, but his infamy has lead to the systemic oppression of clowns, jesters, and mimes the world over! A true tragedy...well, except for the mime part. If this mission will advance his plans, it is our duty as defenders of non-evil comedy to stop him.

Greg turns to the Endless Journey. I have no idea why you want to abduct a lot of children, but as long as it will keep them safe from the Clown Prince and we won't later have to bring out a doll and ask them to point to where the ship touched them, I don't have too much of a problem with it. Just tell us where we need to go.
"Ah, no... I can assure you that all such interests were quite purged from me when I was granted this form. New people frequently, rather than focusing to any degree on just one for their entire life.

Doesn't mean I haven't been accused once or twice, but those were hardly very interesting really. Now that time a dryad tried to have me damaged in hopes of tricking me into having myself repaired with magically sustained planks from her tree... that was actually somewhat entertaining. I might even tell my heroic passengers about some time if we all survive this..."

Why does some piper want us to rescue children? Jillian asks clearly confused.
The Endless Journey briefly but masterfully recounts the story of the Pied Piper.

"No motive was ever really given in most versions of the story, and my own... well, let's just say that I've actually heard a version where his motive was somewhat like my own in this case, but it wasn't very well told, and it painted a rather bleak picture of the world. I stand strong in the hope that we can do better in real life."


Mayor:
"You can't possibly be serious! I say that this Clown Prince has got his hooks into you somehow!"

The Endless Journey:
"Uh, HUH... tell me oh heroes whose collective name is not mine to give: Can you feel it? The touch of the sphere? Or not? Do you note anything it is doing to you?"

Make a DC 23 ability score check with your highest mental ability score. If you get it, you may open the spoiler below.
You are currently in the long, slow process of making an approximately DC -10 (that is NEGATIVE ten) Will save that can't be failed on a natural 1. The magic feels... angry. You started making this save (still the same SINGLE die-roll) a few minutes after you arrived at this location, but it was so subtle you never realized it until The Endless Journey pointed it out.

[Illven]

Jillian shrugs.

I feel fine. At least I think I do?

[BilltheCynic]

Greg puts a hand to a chin and positions his ghostly body as if sitting in mid-air, deep in thought. Suddenly, he snaps his fingers.

Of course! It's making us hear you say that you want to abduct an entire town's worth of children when you really aren't! Whew, you had me a bit worried for a minute, ship.

[DracoDei]

The Endless Journey:
"Give it a few days Jillian. Of course, I very much doubt you will ever be in any danger from it, no matter how long this goes on. My point is that if you can't even feel it, then it is very very far from having had enough time to effect me of all people.

And yes, you heard correctly Greg.

What about you Tinac?"

[ngilop]

"I am not feeling anything. So I guess that's a good thing..?" Tinac looks to the others then continues " I concede that your intentions with the children are just, but you understand that of course the town folk's worry about such?" Tinac turns towards the mayor and tries his best to word it so that the mayor will acquiesce to the endless journey's statement in the most hurried of fashions "mayor, unless you want your children to end up like the poor sods your burning in those pits you should just let the journey have them, after all with not children you have no future."

Diplomacy: [roll0]

[BilltheCynic]

Greg points to Tinac. What he said. And don't worry, I believe that the ship is completely trustworthy and just trying to do the right thing to help you people.

Bluff: [roll0]

[DracoDei]

"You are mad! All of you! The only reason I'm not going to kindly ask you all to leave is that this situation is so desperate and crazy that...

Well, I'll put it to a vote..."

He has obviously had his world rocked and lost a lot of trust in you all... but how could he not? Such dread bargains may be the best choice, but they are not something that most people are really equipped to deal with.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg reels back as if offended. Mad? Mad?! I am not mad; I'm certifiably insane. There's a difference, you know. Anyway, while you guys are voting we have important business to get on with, like punching out evil clown gods. So Ship, where do we go?

[DracoDei]

"I must not have made myself clear. You don't go anywhere in particular. You stay here and help defend the town. I, on the other hand, will be ranging slightly more widely, although not, of course, far enough that the zone influence of the sphere gets spread around too much."

Just the tiniest sliver of peeve slips into The Endless Journey's voice.

[Illven]

Oh awesome! Jillian replied.

I've always wanted to be in a siege.... Granted I usually thought I'd be on the other side... But I suppose Fireball is an anti-catapult weapon.

How long will we be holding the line?

[r2d2go]

Joseph looks very distracted, as if staring at something in the distance that is very, very concerning. He shakes his head and returns to his surroundings. "Errr... Just tell me what to stab." He mimes stabbing something with one of his weapons.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg brightens immediately. Oh, we get to defend the village from the invaders! Say no more, I have a plan. Ok, we'll need a crap ton of sulfur, charcoal, and potassium nitrate-

Suddenly, out of nowhere a thick book appears and throws itself at his face.

Ow! Ok, ok, we won't pull that one. Hmm, we've still got to get the village defensible. You have a blacksmith, which means you have an anvil. That will of course come in handy. What are the other resources available to us, what kinda skills do you people have, and how long do we have to prep?

[DracoDei]

Joseph looks very distracted, as if staring at something in the distance that is very, very concerning. He shakes his head and returns to his surroundings. "Errr... Just tell me what to stab." He mimes stabbing something with one of his weapons.
"I'm sure you can work that out with the townsfolk and your long-term comrades."


How long will we be holding the line?
"A month at the very most I should think. Could be as short as a few days. I suppose I could go so far as to figure that out."

The Endless Journey starts asking questions about the course of the attacks so far, veering over into the details of how they have deployed everyone (and it seems to be very interested in making sure that absolutely everyone is accounted for).

((OOC: EXCELLENT question... unfortunately I'm less impressed with my answer. This will have to do for now. I will probably have more to add later, but hopefully y'all can get some ideas from the above.))

[ngilop]

Tinac nods his head as his compatriots ask their questions. "Sounds like we need to start making friends and get t seeing how we can best defend the town."

[DracoDei]

"That sounds wise."

[BilltheCynic]

Greg turns to Mordecci. So, what kind of defenses do you guys have, and what materials do you have to work with? I for one am in favor of taking that blacksmith's anvil and rigging it into a crush trap.

[DracoDei]

Greg gets a look like he is crazy (which he is).

The discussion moves towards how the town should be defended. Y'all find that the locals have done a pretty good job but you have a few improvements to suggest in the coming hours.

An anvil is way too useful for repairing damaged weapons to be wasted on a trap...

I'm going to off-screen any explanation of the pre-existing overall defenses of the town. Y'all will be defending a wine vineyard probably surrounded by a 3 foot wall.

What I need to hear from you is how YOU would defend the town. No, I'm not going to tell you anything more than you already know about the lay-out of the town. That would only be a distraction at this point. I MIGHT be convinced to give you a description of the people in the town, but that is probably going to be a matter of "ask the right questions and I will tell you."... and I will probably be erring on the side of being uninformative or even (technically) mis-informative. I'll continue to think on such things as play proceeds. This is a much less straight-forward tactical puzzle to create than I am used to creating, so I'm still refining it as I go.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg pouts and shifts into a caricature of Mordecci. Anvils are too useful for repairs to drop on people's heads," he says in a mocking tone. Feh. There loss.

Greg returns to his normal appearence and turns to the others. Well gang, looks like we got to defend a bunch of grapes from some clown cultists. You know, typical heroes stuff. I say we mess up the grounds, throw caltrops and oil and stuff around, maybe even a couple of bit traps. All of us except Tinac have some way to fly, and Jillian can always magic Tinac some flying power. Sure the townsfolk might be a bit angry at that, but hey, they should have thought of that before inviting us here by shooting at our ship. All we need is some way to lure the evil clowns in so they are stuck in the smack zone. I propose a giant level in the middle of the vineyard with a large sign over that says, "DO NOT PULL LEVER". It's fool proof.

[Illven]

As for the defending the town.

Jillian wanted the highest building, with multiple windows.

She wanted line of sight, she wanted cover, and that was the simplest method she could think of for both.

[r2d2go]

Joseph looks rather forlorn at the idea of taking on a great deal of people at once - Defending many people against many people is not his forte. Thus, he proposes to go on the offensive, giving a beat-down to prime targets that wander near a small group of people who need protecting, then rushing back in case he is needed. To this end, he asks around for particularly good archers, mid-ranged mages, and the like - people who want to be close enough to the battlefield to get in accurate shots but far enough to stay away from retaliation.

[ngilop]

"I'm not too ... experienced in the whole military tactic thing. But, I think maybe we should like have a way to funnel the aggressors into a smaller area where the full size of their force is not against us? like dib some big pits except for a few places or.. I am not sure just throwing ideas out and hoping one sounds decent" Tinac says rather sheepishly the healer you understand is more concerned and focused towards helping others and rendering aid, not so much finding ways to inflict injuries on others.

[BilltheCynic]

Greg senses a sudden feeling of plot foreboding come over him. He floats over to the mayor, now dressed in a suit, a fedora, and a pair of thick glasses, and carrying a notepad and a pen. I know this is a lot to take in for you guys, but I'm still not entirely clear about all that's happening here. In my defense, there was a really pretty butterfly that was flying around nearby. Really distracting, you know? Anyway, can I get you on record for a summary of what's the situation right now and the exact event to lead up to it, along with your personal opinion on why you guys aren't stab happy right now?

Sense Motive:
[roll0]
[roll1]
[roll2]
[roll3]
[roll4]

[DracoDei]

The mayor looks even more worried than usual.

((Hope I am not making too many mistakes here...))

"Honestly? I have no idea why we haven't seen some serious incidents when you put it like that... I mean, the situation is pretty tense, so of course there have been some fist fights and such, not to mention plenty of harsh words. Maybe knowing what the threat is provides some sort of a buffer? Come to that... well, it is probably nothing, but we did have one fellow go insane in a way that might have been directly caused by the artifact. Blind Old Tim started swinging a knife at any sound he heard. One of the deputies got a bit trigger happy on a crossbow... err, not crazy I don't think, just sorta how folks will get when their blood is up y'know? Anyway, its hard, but we didn't want to waste healing on a man who might be crazy but certainly couldn't fight when we might need it at any minute for someone who could, so Blind Old Tim is still recovering in bed. Hasn't woke up yet. That was about three days ago.

As for what has happened to this point, near as we can figure, the Maguvs, McCabes, and Summersets, who are all branches of the same family came to town because they were a cult that had gone intergenerational. Mostly of Erythnul, but a few Hextorites in each generation. They came into town about six weeks ago, all in a group, with a ox-cart in the middle of them with that sphere lashed down in it. They started killing folk, and even the oxen joined in, despite never having shown a sign of being war-trained before that. Might have had something to do with some new brands that Sipo reported seeing, although we don't have anyone to corroborate that.

Luckily we had a paladin visiting, although he and half our militia died in the fight. His name was Ibio*

A few days after that the paladins' body rose up and started killing, but it certainly didn't have much skill. We only left him lay whole since we thought that someone might be wanting to put in the magic and diamonds to bring him back... even took up a list of those who would be willing to donate some coins towards the cost of the diamonds. We put his corpse down without too much trouble... but then dead animals started doing the same... then the live ones. We gathered in the farmers from the surround households and started slaughtering all but the best of the breeding stock... by now we've killed even that, simply because it was too hard to keep them fed while still tending out our defenses. Oddly enough the cats and dogs seem to be immune so far...

We sent out messengers... but one of them... oh, I guess that should qualify... Exis came back, and he was murderous. Would have been a bigger problem except that he wasn't fighting smart. Guy was more the sort to slip up behind a body than to charge head-long, which is why we sent him... figured he could slip through. Came back bold as brass and... well, we had to do for him.

Actually, maybe that is it? Having a big group of people who are not in the thrall of the artifact keeps its danger at bay? Like it gets spread out trying to chase after all of them? Or just having friends with you helps? Except that there was a group of five merchants who always travelled together and they arrived just as dangerous as any of the others...

Anyway, a few days ago Granny Alberts died and came back before we could burn her... up until then we thought it might only those close to the sphere, but she had just come into town a the day before that.

So... we are basically under seige by everything that lives in the area... well, except for the plants, and I swear some of them seem to have grown thorns where there weren't supposed to be any on that sort of plant."
*((Might be incorrect because I'm not checking through the entire backlog to see if I already named him.))

Someone else chimes in "Yeah, you can look at the grape-vines up in the area you picked out... grapes aren't supposed to have thorns, but they are growing little ones, despite the snow covering them."

The mayor nods and continues.

"So, it has been all hands on blades, even those who shouldn't ever be raising a knife in anger... pregnant women, any child old enough to be trusted to swing at what's coming at him rather than innocently at whatever strikes their innocent fancy, old folks, so on and so forth... hopefully with y'all here we can give that a break with you holding a large section of our perimeter, providing better tactics, and/or serving as a reserve force**."

**((GMs note: You aren't going to be serving as a reserve force to start with... GM fiat says that that you are a bigger help holding the vineyard.))

[BilltheCynic]

Greg spins around again, now wearing a deerstalker hat and smoking on a calabash pipe. Hmm. Mysterious. Not sure I buy the group theory. We came in with just four people, and we hardly wanted to kill anyone here much.

Hey! Maybe that's it! Tinac over there has heard of something like this before. The crazy lady who told him about it advised him to "Not fight it, just go with it...then smash the thing." Ok, before the murder ball came to this place how peaceful was this town? Like, were you guys regularly fighting off monsters, bandits, door-to-door salesmen, and other atrocities of the wilderness? And that blind Tom guy, was he a pacifistic sort before he went stab happy?

I'm thinking that the sphere makes people want to fight more. If you're not the fighting type, it makes you the fighting type. If you're already the fighting type, it doesn't affect you much. That's why you guys aren't really affected, but random merchants are! And why dogs and cats, natural born killers, just shrug off the thing, while oxen and rabbits and pigs start wanting to eat each other alive. As usual, violence really is the answer to this problem. Whatever you do, do not give peace a chance.

Oh, one more thing. In your experience, do the people who go stab happy also like to violence each other, or do they team up to take down the non stab happy people?

[DracoDei]

"I'd say we were as peaceful as any other town. The usual problems, not much more or less. Got a wyrmling red poking around trying to find a soft lairing spot about 15 years back. We didn't manage a kill, but we showed her we weren't soft."
((Further investigation into the specifics details of their history with violence will reveal, that, yes, they really are pretty average.))

"Tom... well, I can't say for certain, but I'd say he was mostly just trying to get by same as anyone else. Don't recall him having any particular philosophies of any unusual nature.

As for violence between our attackers... no such luck that we have observed. Although they only seem to have any sort of coordination with eachother SOMETIMES. Well, the smart ones, like live humanoids, usually team up with eachother, but with the animals and undead it seems to be rarer."

[BilltheCynic]

Upon hearing his latest theory go up in smoke, Greg grabs his new hat and hurls it behind him. It disappears after a few meters. Argh! Why can't I have a genius theory that isn't immediately disproven with two minutes? Is that really so much to ask? Ugh, now I wish I'd sunk more points into intelligence.

Ok guys, I'm at a bit of a loss as to how exactly this thing works now. Maybe fighting people who have been driven stab happy will give us a clue as to what's going on. I say we prep for defending the town against whatever's coming our way. Anyone object?

[ngilop]

"As that is what I recommended already, I say yes let see to the defenses" Tinac looks at the mayor then back to the group "what, how and, where do you think setting up any defenses should be?"

[BilltheCynic]

Greg groans. Why are you looking at me? I'm the looney guy who's idea of a sound defense is a bunch of giant mousetraps that explode when they snap! Ugh, fine! Since these guys lack the finer points of explosive hilarity, that exploding mousetraps are sadly out.

Ok, so we've got to defend a vineyard or something, and we know that there's this clown prince dude who's gonna be sending guys even I think are crazy. I don't think we can really predict what's coming our way, so no need to prepare for specifics. One thing we have going for us is our utter disdain for gravity. Both Joe and I can lift off whenever, and Jill can magic you two airborn in no time. I say we litter the place with marbles, caltrops, and maybe pit traps if we have time. They won't affect us, but they might affect whatever is coming. Since Jill can cast through her cat, I say we get Jill somewhere close enough to magic you with flight when we need it, but far enough that she's not gonna be in the line of fire. Maybe dig a special foxhole just for her. Actually, might be better to get you in some hidey place too, or at least somewhere they won't see you when they first come. I can go ethereal, so they'll never see me either until I drop a safe on their heads. That leaves Joe. Looks like you're the bait. Try to look intimidating, but not too intimidating that they don't bother attacking.

Ok, anyone else have anything to add? If not, let's get to it! It feels like we've been preparing for this for, like, three months, and I for one am ready for some action!

[DracoDei]

Over the low wall, somebody sees... something.

((Still not seeing that last character and up to three hovering weapons on the map...))