WWKkD? (What Would Kilkil Do?)

[Reddish Mage]

So after the admission by The Giant, that he wrote the most interesting accountant (I know difficult contest) ever out of a bigger role in the back half, I'm wondering what the story would look like if Kilkil was a major player?

How would OOTS look if Kilkil got put in play as major supporting NPC?

{scrubbed}

[Murk]

First off, he would have naturally killed Belkar. After Belkars kobold-killing spree and then sweet redemption (including vow never to kill kobolds again), the unconspicious and seemingly harmless accountant would turn out to be a pretty adequate halflingkiller.

Second, it is to be expected Tarquin would never have flown off the handle, staying his calm and controlling self. After all, who can resist the rational reasoning of an accountant, when he tells you your rage-fueled vendetta costs you way too many soldiers, favours and energy?
How this would have influenced the Tarquin-Elan relation is anyone's guess. Maybe they would have departed on better terms?

Third, a major role for a mathemetically aligned kobold would optimise the functioning of the Empire of Blood in the grant scheme of things. Trading a dimensionportal with a god-killing creature for a favour? You really think Kilkil would have accepted that? Leaving a ragtag band of adventurers to kill an epich lich in a battle for the worlds fate? Kilkil would know better. Letting your cleric with an allergy for sun go on an adventure without an umbrella? Of course not!
So, with Kilkil in a major role, Tarquins party would not be so hopelessly defeated. Instead, they would choose wise courses of action, and would now be marching armies to Kraagors Gate, their party intact, and would already use the Snarl in their own gate as an environmentally friendly energy-source.

Or so I guess.

[BrotherMirtillo]

Ever since Tarquin, Malack, and Kilkil got themselves inducted into the Linear Guild, I'd hoped that the inevitable fight against the Order would involve something like this.

-Belkar steps up to fight the latest kobold.
-Kilkil watches Belkar, curious but unworried. Possibly he files a complaint for Belkar interfering with his paperwork on Ian.
-Belkar has his daggers at the ready and a toothy grin on his face.
-Kilkil turns out to be an ~18th-level psion, totally roasting Belkar and striking koboldic fear into his heart far beyond anything ever seen before.

I'd hoped this because "psion" was the one class that a) I knew about and b) hadn't gotten a proper dose of screentime yet. I'd figured Kilkil's organizational skills suggested high Intelligence, and it would be a hoot to see a pint-sized professional bureaucrat turn into a pint-sized avatar of sub-molecular destruction.

Of course, Laurin filled that niche. But I thought it was a fun idea, nonetheless.


After Belkars kobold-killing spree and then sweet redemption (including vow never to kill kobolds again), the unconspicious and seemingly harmless accountant would turn out to be a pretty adequate halflingkiller.
Let me make sure I read this right. Belkar's done the sprees, but I'm pretty sure he's never made a non-killing vow in-comic, so does this mean Kilkil would be the one to extract the apology and vow? That'd be something to see... and then he kills Belkar anyway. Cold -- the Belkster might approve, if he wasn't dead.


Second, it is to be expected Tarquin would never have flown off the handle, staying his calm and controlling self. After all, who can resist the rational reasoning of an accountant...

I'm not sure about Tarquin, however. Even imagining Kilkil as a big player, I'm not convinced he could rein an egotistical guy like Tarquin in when Tarquin goes off onto one of his big stories. Kilkil seems more like the guy who's in charge of making Tarquin's ideas possible.

But here's a thought -- what if Kilkil convinces Malack (who, I agree, Kilkil would save from the sun) to rein Tarquin in? Malack has emotional leverage with Tarquin, and Kilkil could be the one to suggest that Tarquin's about to make a few bad deals. That could be Kilkil's shtick: he's the kobold behind the conspirators behind the Empress! His constant duties as the business face of the Empire have given him diplomatic skills second to none, even outpacing the explosive Tarquin and exasperated Malack. He knows they're in control, and he controls the information and the troubleshooting to make sure things keep working properly.

Kilkil: as smooth and sharp as a Disintegration beam.

[Lvl45DM!]

keep calm
and
file paperwork

[Reddish Mage]

Of course not!
So, with Kilkil in a major role, Tarquins party would not be so hopelessly defeated. Instead, they would choose wise courses of action, and would now be marching armies to Kraagors Gate, their party intact, and would already use the Snarl in their own gate as an environmentally friendly energy-source.




Kilkil: as smooth and sharp as a Disintegration beam.

Ok, I was thinking more beuracrat with the resources of three empires at his disposal that he could coordinate just by filing the right forms...

But diplomancer and psion are interesting direction




keep calm
and
file paperwork

This works also Tee, please.

[Lvl45DM!]

This works also Tee, please.

Pardon? im not sure what you mean

[Murk]

Let me make sure I read this right. Belkar's done the sprees, but I'm pretty sure he's never made a non-killing vow in-comic, so does this mean Kilkil would be the one to extract the apology and vow? That'd be something to see... and then he kills Belkar anyway. Cold -- the Belkster might approve, if he wasn't dead.

I actually meant at a time in the far far future, when Belkars inevitable redemption had already happened. (No, I know it's not inevitable, but if Kilkil were a major player, that's what I expect). Y'know, some sweet irony.

However:

Kilkil: as smooth and sharp as a Disintegration beam.
This is as perfect as it gets. No need to say anything more.

[Reboot]

-Kilkil turns out to be an ~18th-level psion, totally roasting Belkar and striking koboldic fear into his heart far beyond anything ever seen before.

I'd hoped this because "psion" was the one class that a) I knew about and b) hadn't gotten a proper dose of screentime yet. I'd figured Kilkil's organizational skills suggested high Intelligence, and it would be a hoot to see a pint-sized professional bureaucrat turn into a pint-sized avatar of sub-molecular destruction.


To be fair, he was paralysed (and more) by Holy Word - when most of the LG (and Belkar!) were only deafened - before Rich's enforced break, during which he cut things down (so that the OotS realised "thog" was Tarquin without a second fight). So, by the original premise of the thread, that was never on the cards even if he'd had a bigger role!

[martianmister]

Belkar would be dead.

[Reddish Mage]

Pardon? im not sure what you mean

Pardon, requires punctuation. I love your statement, and I want it on a T-shirt.