View Full Version : Playing With Fire! (and other dangerous things)

2007-04-20, 02:45 PM
Okay, so here's what happened when the DM ran out of stuff to do and pretty much just set our 11th level party loose on a poorly defended town.
I was an Elf Wizard.
After taking over the monk's body with a nifty magic jar spell, I had the half-ogre (the only person who like me) guard my body while I while streaked through town in the monk's body, scaring old ladies and beating up kids. Afterwards, I gave him back his body, and in a rather unmonkish display of petty rage, he tried to kill me while I was sitting in the inn, sipping some wine. I teleported outside and launched a several fireballs inside. Thanks to his acursed evasion, he completely avoided the damage from all three fireballs, but then died when the inn caught on fire and collapsed on him while my half-ogre buddy held him inside (I told him I'd get him out at the last minute), then I sorted through the rubble later and used the half-ogre's body for the last part of my flesh golem.
The End.

2007-04-20, 02:49 PM
So, my BBEG captured the soul of Heironeous in a basketball-sized diamond. I gave it to my PC's, and they promptly broke it. "Accidentally."

Playing with Reality is fun, too!

2007-04-20, 02:49 PM
Uh... Congrats. I assume you were ALREADY evil, so I won't recommend an alignment shift.

2007-04-20, 02:49 PM
That's... evil.

How did you beat the monk's will save? Are your save DC's pumped?

Really, 15+int modifier vs probably +18 or so, maybe even 20's range, doesn't sound too probable.

Low wisdom.... monk?

2007-04-20, 02:50 PM
Hooray for making Reality our <female dog>!
And yes, I was about as evil as you can get.

2007-04-20, 02:51 PM
That's... evil.

How did you beat the monk's will save? Are your save DC's pumped?

Really, 15+int modifier vs probably +18 or so, maybe even 20's range, doesn't sound too probable.

Mad pumps, plus, he didn't have great will save, low wisdom.

2007-04-20, 03:24 PM
...a monk, with... low Wisdom? You know you actually have to specifically engineer a monk to make him bad at fighting spellcasters... Well, sort of.

You were level 11? Why no walls of force on the inn?

2007-04-20, 04:21 PM
Because I had a stupid, loyal to the death half-ogre for thath.

Mr. Moogle
2007-04-20, 08:18 PM
Oh My GOD That half-orc is like my bert friends 5 int ranger fighter with mad intimidate

2007-04-21, 09:03 AM
I was playing a two person quickie campaign recently, just me (the ranger) and a dwarven fighter. There was a herd of elephants charging at a nice little village, I rolled good on a ride check and managed to get on to riding an elephant. I stopped 5 of them with a heavy dose of charm animal, and another I stopped with wild empathy, one of them I blinded by wrapping my cloak over it's eyes and the final one I stopped by casting entangle. Me and the dwarf walked towards the town where we were to get a reward. Unfortunatly, we ruined a festival for the townspeople, who turned on us.

Being crazy old me, I attempted to climb up the side of the tavern, where I could snipe them. Another bad thing, the tavern turned out to be a HUGE animated object. I climbed onto the roof sucessfully, where I pushed the chimney off the roof and killed four of the townspeople. I then got slapped by a weathervane.

Our DM was a little silly, but out of our normal playing group, only us three had turned up. The other two (the DM of the campaign we were actually on and some fat kid who no one likes) couldn't be arsed to show up.

2007-04-21, 06:05 PM
Freakin' hilarious.

2007-04-21, 07:05 PM
I once rolled a 1 on the attack for a ray, and my DM said "Okay, it shoots off over his shoulder into the distance". A few sessions later, I was attacked by about fifty peasants (level 12 sorcerer). After killing them all myself, I asked one who was badly wounded why they'd attacked me.
"You burned down our village with your ray!"

2007-04-21, 09:23 PM
I was playing a cleric of a business/money god. Now, while some of my actions are evil, others were good, but overall maintain a nasty form of neutrality while I was amassing money to worship my god with.

Thrall of Grazzt is building a drug network so he can enslave a group of combat nutters. So, I agreed to find a way to provide him with the materials for his drug trade (for the right price...). (Evil actions)
Once the Thrall of Grazzt would have the combat nutters drugged, he'd release them on all the clerics in the city, after sacrificing multiple virgin girls to get a Purple Rain cast.

Step #1
Problem: if all the good clerics get killed, and the city is under the grip of a crazed psycho Thrall of Grazzt, I'm not likely to make any money...

Step #2
Solution: Sell the Thrall out to the Pelorites. Clerics saved, people stay, I make money.

Step #3
Bonus: The Thrall has lost his drug network to the Pelorites. He'll probably want to restablish that and that will take more drugs... the kind I can sell him...

Rinse & Repeat Steps #1 to #3 for remainder of campaign, getting a serious stockpile up for my God and keeps a balance between good and evil so that I can maintain the income (and my Neutral Alignment)