OotS Jokes!

[mockingbyrd7]

I can't believe I've never seen a thread similar to this; in contrast to all the gloomy Roy threads going on right now, let's buckle our swash and slash a punny swath through the depression, Dashing-Swordsman style! Let's try something a bit more light-hearted: an OotS joke thread!

I'll start us off...

"I know V's gender. V is not a hermaphrodite. V is not straight nor gay. V is not genderless, though! V is aware V has a gender, but V is nor male nor female. V... is...

V-MALE!"

Also, bring somebody aside, and say, "I need to tell you something, and if I don't I'm just going to explode. I'm completely in love with you-" pause, and continue- "keleles." (EDIT: I meant, reference to strip 184. Sorry)

Think you've got what it takes to be a Dashing Swordsman-level pun weaver? Bring it on! :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue: :smalltongue:

[EYanyo]

I don't get the second one. 182 is where V, as a lizard, is unsuccessfully trying to cast suggestion on the black dragon.

[Legendary]

He meant #184.

[wolfwithnofangs]

V-male :smallbiggrin: maybe I should invent my own gender.

[Tharr]

My Roys Ipod has alot of jokes well here one.

Why did Haley name V's raven Blackwing?

Because Redwing is the Falcons mascot in Marvel and lawyers do sue.

[BisectedBrioche]

Q: Why was the illithid really written out?

A: It was only being paid 50 squid

[happyturtle]

'I'm glad Roy's dead. He's such a stick in the mud'

[Fawkes]

'I'm glad Roy's dead. He's such a stick in the mud'

Too soon!

Show some respect.

[Adventurer]

Too soon! Show some respect.

But if he waits, who knows if the joke will still be valid:smallbiggrin:

[Twilight Jack]

Every time someone comments that a joke about a tragic death is too soon, I'm tempted to turn around and tell them "The Aristocrats."

[Fawkes]

Every time someone comments that a joke about a tragic death is too soon, I'm tempted to turn around and tell them "The Aristocrats."

I really don't see the relevance here.

[Twilight Jack]

At the Friar's Roast of Hugh Hefner, held roughly one month after September 11, 2001, Gilbert Gottfried had the bad sense to tell a (rather mild) 9/11 joke (having to do with his flight into NY having a stop-over at the Empire State Building). The audience responded very negatively to the joke, prompting Gottfried to fire back with a 20 minute long, rapid fire telling of "The Aristocrats," widely considered to be the most potentially offensive joke ever conceived.

Essentially, he threw the entire concept of "too offensive" back in the audience's face, embarking on an over-the-top paean to obscenity that had Rob Schnieder literally falling out of his chair laughing at one point.

Hence, when you complain that a joke about Roy's demise is too soon, and therefore offensive or tasteless, my immediate urge is to demonstrate true tastelessness, just for the sake of contrast.

Hence, "The Aristocrats."

[Fawkes]

1. I wasn't being completely serious, although I didn't appreciate the joke.

2. My beef with jokes about people's deaths isn't that they're offensive, but that they're disrespectful to the deceased and their loved ones. In this case, it doesn't really matter, because Roy is fictional, but there are those of us who truly cared about him, real or not, and we don't want to hear jokes about them. I'm not saying you have to stop, but come on, at least try to understand where we're coming from. What if someone in Gottfried's audience knew someone who died in the tragedy? I'd say the chances are pretty likely someone there did. If your spouse or brother had died like that, I doubt you'd appreciate someone cracking jokes about it.

[Jade_Tarem]

Belkar has a right to be angry. Shopkeepers keep short-changing him.

There are no small parts, only small characters.

There's only one member of the Order that can change a lightbulb, and that's V. "Transmute lightbulb to dinner plate!"

Understanding the Linear Guild is a fairly straightforward process.

[SteveMB]

A dwarf, a homicidal halfling, and an androgynous elf walk into a bar.

The barkeep asks, "What is this -- some kind of joke?"

[BisectedBrioche]

Replace the name "Black Belt" in all of these (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=041111) with Roy and let's call it a day.

Also:

What's the difference between Charmander and Belkar?

One is a fire starting pocket monster....

[Twilight Jack]

To show disrespect is to offer offense.

Also, I do think it very likely that those in the audience knew people who had died in the attack. It is likely that Gottfried himself did. The essential question on the table then, is this: in which events is it immoral or inappropriate to find humor and to show it to others? The untimely death of another is often senseless. The untimely deaths of over 3,000 is hideously surreal. Certain amongst us find it necessary to seek out a laugh in the absurdity, lest we are crushed by the meaninglessness.

Comedy is a cruel mistress. It functions through dissonance, deconstructs and reconstructs the arbitrary back into a sort of meaning. After you've wept yourself dry, you can turn the thing over and look for the smile, the giggle, the guffaw. It just might tide you over and let you face down the next wave of tears.

[One Skunk Todd]

Poor Roy, his brains splattered all over the plane like so many chicken ova. I guess it's true what they say, if you don't want to make eggs, you gotta break some amulets.

~flees in terror~

[Twilight Jack]

Poor Roy, his brains splattered all over the plane like so many chicken ova. I guess it's true what they say, if you don't want to make eggs, you gotta break some amulets.

~flees in terror~

As well you should, not for the dead Roy joke, but for the pun!

[Sean92k]

Whats the difference between paper and roy?
Papers a bit more 3D

Or have we gone off Roy jokes?

[IlanaAeryn]

Haley's only second in command because that means she gets to spend other people's money. She wouldn't stand for spending her own. That's why she's really crying in #444.

[Fawkes]

Certain amongst us find it necessary to seek out a laugh in the absurdity, lest we are crushed by the meaninglessness.

But that's not for everyone. People should be able to make their own choices regarding humor in the face of tragedy, and not have to suffer through listening to others make light of it.

[Fishybugs]

But that's not for everyone. People should be able to make their own choices regarding humor in the face of tragedy, and not have to suffer through listening to others make light of it.

They can. They read other forums.

[BisectedBrioche]

What are the OotSs favorite fruits?;

Melans

[Fawkes]

They can. They read other forums.

Wow. Thank so much for missing my entire point and making that completely irrelevant remark. Really. Thanks.

[Sandrock]

How can a joke hurt? When its done wrong.

Really though....death jokes can help and hurt. dose that make every one happy?

Fangyou for comeing to the battle.
Fang's alot for comeing to die!

[SandroTheMaster]

:xykon: What? What are you doing here?

:roy: Surprised to see me alive?

:xykon: Surprised? Who in the damned heavens are you?

:roy: Grrr! Well, just so you know, there`s a little spell called Raise Dead. You could try it someday, if wasn`t a serious health hazard to you. So just you know, we are fire-proof now! That means that your fellow friend, Meteor Shower, is history. You could just as well surrender and let me execu... HEY!

:xykon: Zzzzzzzz... Huh?! What? Oh, you`re still here. Meteor Shower!

:roy: Ha! I told you we were fire-proof. That`s the price of not listening!

:xykon: Really? Fire-proof, you say? So it`s time to introduce you to Meteor Shower evil brother.

:roy: Wait! Meteor Shower has an EVIL brother?

:xykon: Wail of Banshee!

:roy: XX

:redcloak: Good job sir! You didn`t even break a sweat this time.

:xykon: This time? Who were they?

[Innis Cabal]

are these supposed to be jokes?

[kpenguin]

Ughhh.... leave the jokes the Rich, guys.

[BisectedBrioche]

Ughhh.... leave the jokes the Rich, guys.

Only if you promise to leave the posting to people who've mastered the English language.

[Innis Cabal]

now see that was amusing