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LibraryOgre
2015-07-17, 09:26 PM
Reposted with permission from the Hackmaster Boards (http://www.kenzerco.com/forums/showthread.php?64188-Player-got-a-little-too-cocky-then-not-at-all)


I was running a game of HM when the party entered a room with a few chests in it. Before checking the chests, the CN barbarian claims the really big one all to himself. The rest of the party immediately begins to argue that it should be split evenly. To try and mark his territory, he pulls down his breeches, waddles to the big chest and puts his "Equipment" on it.

While he is doing this, he turns half way to the party and says "Do you want it now?".

He is facing the rest of the party and so he doesnt see what the party does. In a flash, the chest opens and clamps down.

The barbarian tea bagged a mimic. The mimic didnt crit, but I figure that the resulting 19 damage (no DR pal) was enough to give him the impotent flaw as well as a phobia of chests.

After about 2 minutes, the mimic was dead but the barbarian (Who I think is going to GNC) has a broken spirit as well as a TERRIBLE honor score. The party hated him (the player, is a cool guy and we look forward to his next character) and told his tales to EVERYONE.

Kid Jake
2015-07-17, 09:29 PM
When has proclaiming "I want the big one all to myself!" ever ended well for a player?

Draconium
2015-07-17, 09:31 PM
Sounds like someone got a bit too big for their britches...

Balmas
2015-07-18, 12:46 AM
Sounds like someone got a bit too big for their britches...

Well, he won't have that problem anymore. :smalltongue:

Milodiah
2015-07-18, 03:42 AM
Oh dear...


Pretty sure raging testosterone is a prerequisite for barbarians, I'm afraid he'll be knocked right out of this line of work without an...erm...adequate source.

Oberon Kenobi
2015-07-20, 02:36 PM
Pretty sure raging testosterone is a prerequisite for barbariansAhem. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Sonja) :smallamused:

Anonymouswizard
2015-07-20, 02:57 PM
So he didn't block it with his chest muscles?

Loving the title, and yeah, I've a feeling that this is why the 'old' player that I know (roughly twice the age of the rest of the group) tends to never do anything without careful planning.

The Glyphstone
2015-07-20, 03:07 PM
Was the pun in your thread title intentional?

LibraryOgre
2015-07-20, 06:30 PM
Borrowed from the Hackmaster boards, I suspect it was intentional.

Marlowe
2015-07-20, 07:20 PM
So his junk's in the trunk?:smalleek:

Lurkmoar
2015-07-20, 07:35 PM
Thank you for sharing that.

Just out of curiosity, what does GNC stand for?

JNAProductions
2015-07-20, 07:36 PM
That was beautiful. Sheer beauty.

YossarianLives
2015-07-20, 07:52 PM
Just out of curiosity, what does GNC stand for?
I could be wrong but I believe it means "get new character."

Sith_Happens
2015-07-20, 11:36 PM
So his junk's in the trunk?:smalleek:

http://byt.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/tumblr_mtzmeqC16Z1qcga5ro1_500.gif

Winter_Wolf
2015-07-21, 08:59 AM
Thank you for sharing that.

Just out of curiosity, what does GNC stand for?

Could be the nutritional supplement store GNC, which among other things sells stuff like Creatine, Anabolic Stack, protein bars; stuff you'd sell to guys who want to get big muscles. Well that's what it thought of anyway.

Slipperychicken
2015-07-21, 02:47 PM
In his rush for treasure, he lost his family jewels.

(Un)Inspired
2015-07-21, 04:47 PM
Ahem. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Sonja) :smallamused:
I'm pretty sure Red Sonja is pumping more testosterone than most dudes.


So his junk's in the trunk?:smalleek:

Bravo