View Full Version : 101 Things to do in an RPG

Gideon Falcon
2015-07-30, 11:14 PM
In light of the constant popularity of things we're not allowed to do, I thought it was time to make a list of things I, we, you, etc. should do in an rpg. Technically, I've only got 60 so far, but feel free to add your own ideas to the list.

1- Quote Monty Python applicably. If you can't pull off this one, you seriously need to go sit in the corner.
2- Play a Half-Orc Wizard.
3- Ride every non-hominid in the Monster Manual.
4- Quote Terry Pratchett applicably in-game.
5- Play a Bard based off Buddy Sorrell
6- Play a Dirgesinger who just insults people for his Bardic Music.
7- Marry a random nameless generic NPC.
8- Play a Changeling with multiple personality disorder. None of the personalities know they're a Changeling.
9- Play a Warforged Druid called Optimus Prime.
10- Hire a commoner to walk your dog.
11- Play a female personality Warforged, just for the novelty.
12- Play an ugly catgirl.
13- Quote every classic Disney movie applicably.
14- Play a Bard who Inspires Competence through 'constructive criticism.'
15- Hire 200 commoners. I'll figure out what to do with them later.
16- Quote Young Frankenstein applicably.
17- Have a DM assign me a list of things you may no longer do in an RPG.
18- Play a Bard that uses Perform (mime).
19- Play a Halfling Barbarian as a toddler throwing tantrums.
20- Play a Changeling who impersonates other party members. And copies their actions. For Bardic Music.
21- Play a tapdancing Bard.
22- Play a Warblade as Mr. T.
23- Play a Dragonfire Adept as Shoop-da-whoop.
24- Play a Drow Barbarian. With Arachnophobia.
25- Go forward in time and kill your grandson, just to be contrary.
26- Play a Truenamer with a lisp.
27- Mix up party member's names, even when blindingly obvious (Wait, Krusk? I thought your name was Mialee!).
28- Play a Cloistered Cleric with ranks only in Knowledge skills.
29- Put a Portable Hole in a Bag of Holding... No particular reason, it's just cool.
30- Put a Portable Hole in a Portable Hole. Play the Inception theme for bonus points.
31- Use two Portable Holes to put your torso on someone else's legs.
32- Use Ring Gates to put your arms on backwards.
33- Put a Bag of Devouring in a Portable Hole, just to see what hapens.
34- Keep the Warforged in a Portable Hole.
35- Play a Warforged Scout Monk, and let the Barbarian use you as a thrown weapon.
36- Pull a Leeroy Jenkins. Success optional.
37- Die, play a necromancer as a replacement character, and animate your old character's corpse.
38- As a Wizard, use Shapeshift to switch places with your familiar.
39- Play a Bard with Perform (Air Guitar).
40- Play a Bard with Perform (Tesla Coil).
41- Play an Elf that worships Gruumsh.
42- Play a Half-Orc worshipper of Corellon Larethian.
43- Create a Cleric of Atheism.
44- Play a Warforged Cleric of the Deus Ex Machina.
45- Play a Warforged Bard as DaftPunk.
46- Play an awkward teenage Bard with glasses, an afro, and a bassoon. Delicious Sea Bass optional.
47- Play a Bard as Weird Al Yankovic.
48- As a Druid, have your Animal Companion ride you. Russian accent obligatory.
49- Spend at least 20 minutes quizzing a Genie about the limitations of his wishes (What would I get if I asked for x, can I wish for x ridiculous thing, etc.).
50- Cheat your way out of an Infernal Pact.
51- Sell your soul to an Angel. They give better long-term benefits.
52- Play a Gnome cleric of Kurtulmak.
53- Play a Dwarf that isn't Gimli.
54- Kill someone with Prestidigitation.
55- Infect a Psionic Community with Cascade Flu.
56- Raise a Larval Flayer to a Neothelid, and call it Squishy.
57- Obtain a Divine Rank.
58- Bite a Vampire.
59- Play a Kobold cleric of Garl Glittergold.
60- Enchant a chest to cast Bigby's Slapping Hand on anyone who opens it, before closing itself again.

2015-07-30, 11:34 PM
61. Play an Aasimar/any divine race. Use your blood to make holy water. Insist on giving party members blood transfusions to "protect from evil".
62. Score drugs/any psychoactive substances from a fey, aberration or any outsider. Bonus points if you pass the save against them.

I have 1,2,6,7,14,15(not all at once),16,17,18,36,37(although it was temporary and made a ghost not a corpse),39,49(it was a giant wasp that carried me by flight),49, and 57

2015-07-31, 12:07 AM
63-Infinity: Anything the Gamemaster allows:smallbiggrin:

2015-07-31, 12:50 AM
64. Play an elf raised by dwarves, thus gaining the stonecunning bonuses, elven racial bonuses, and freaking the heck out of any elves you meet. "Greetings Kinsman!" "I ain't no kinsman of you, you butterfly-petting nitwit!"
65. Have your fighter use the party's gnomish battlerager as a throwing weapon. Attach a rope for a self-deploying grappling hook.
66. Go on romantic moonlit strolls through the werewolf ghetto/thieves' quarter/zombie-infested graveyard.
67. Do NOT use halfling hirelings as "test hobbits" by hurling them down suspicious dungeon corridors to detect traps.
68. Gain a magically created phobia permanently.

2015-07-31, 02:58 AM
69 - Write a backstory which justifies multiple dragons attacking you for alimony.
70 - Write a backstory which makes the endgame half-dragon army your own fault, personally.
71 - Write a backstory which is more impressive than your eventual ascension to godhood.

2015-07-31, 07:24 AM
72) Convince the rest of the party to ditch the current plot to go be pirates.
A) Even the paladin!
B) Especially the paladin!
C) Incite an IC brawl over who gets to be captain.
D) Incite an OOC brawl over who gets to be captain!

2015-07-31, 07:31 AM
Does having a squire named Patsy who bangs two coconut halves together as I ride my horse count as quoting Monty Python?

Gideon Falcon
2015-07-31, 10:55 AM
Yes, gloriously so!

73- Rest all the traps in the dungeon before you leave, just to be nasty.

2015-07-31, 11:26 AM
-Tie the Halfling rogue to a ten foot pole and use him as a trap detecting mine sweeper.
-Seduce a queen or princess, bonus points if itís a dragon.
-Get mazed by the lady of pain, escape.
-Get in a bar fight, burn down the tavern in the process
-Get your identity mistaken
-Cause a paladin to fall
-Punch out a camel
-Seduce a succubus
-Get a paladin to seduce a succubus
-Drink the witches brew
-Wait for the evil cabal to summon that elder evil, just to see how it plays out. (then kill the elder evil)
-Take control of the thievesí guild
-Own a strip bar/brothel
-Get chased out of town by peasants wielding pitchforks over a misunderstanding.
-Accidentally burn down the town after a night of carousing and heavy drinking.
-Your party makes up most of the nationís most wanted list; however youíve brought the NPCs on the list in for the bounty.
-Break every law of the land.
-Get arrested for general Amoral behavior; even if you havenít committed any actual crimes.
-Burn down an orphanage, blame it on a paladin (double points if itís an NPC paladin)
-wreck a nationís economy
-provoke a love affair between an angel and a demon.
- lose someoneís tracks through the snow.
-challenge someone to a duel
-carry a water bucket for hp regeneration
-keep a dangerous monster as a pet
-make OOTS references
-destroy the world while trying to save it
-KO the BBEG upon his first appearance, wrecking the DMs, campaign
-jump the grand vizier, theyíre always evil
- Accidently desecrate a church or other holy site
-chop down a dryadís tree
-gelatinous cube Jello shots.
-get a paladin turned to stone, have the local village use him as a fountain
-free the paladin during the next campaign
-provoke a civil war on accident
-provoke a war between two nations, again on accident
-cause a goblinoid uprising, once more on accident
-institute slavery in a nation

Whew I think I can keep going, but I need a breather.

2015-07-31, 03:33 PM
* Conspire with all other players to give the PCs all the same name, spelled in exotically different ways. See how long it takes the DM to notice. Then demand to know why he approved the character sheets if he has a problem with it.


* Playing an Artificer dipped in Fighter, build the entire character construction around the concept of sci-fi power armor using only core magic items.
** A cloak of invisibility for a "cloaking device".
** A Ring of Protection for a "shield generator".
** Boots of Flight as "jump jets".
** Wand of magic missiles as a "machine gun".
** Wand of burning hands as a "flame thrower".
** Wand of Fireball as a "grenade launcher".
** An animated shield as "point defense".
** A Helm of True Seeing as "sensors".
*** Made sentient, named "Jarvis", and granted a spell-like Detect Evil ability which I shall refer to as "IFF".

2015-08-01, 04:25 AM
-Steal so much money you can no longer get caught
-scream at everyone from your limousine
-achieve enlightenment
-in that order if you want
-bet the fate of the world on a coin toss
-charge threw a burning building a rage
-run panicking, screaming and on fire
-casually walk thru fire
-participate in a sword duel
-participate in a musical duel
-participate in a wizard's duel
-participate in a battle between gods
-bonus points if you are none of those things and don't have the necessary skills

2015-08-01, 07:37 AM
Extra bonus points if you don't have the necessary skills and still somehow win.

2015-08-01, 07:53 AM
*Compete with a friend to see who can pull off more of the things Dr Bright is not allowed to do (http://www.scp-wiki.net/the-things-dr-bright-is-not-allowed-to-do-at-the-foundation).

2015-08-01, 08:20 AM
*Get banned from playing gnomes due to excessive shenanigans with chemistry, physics, and engineering.

2015-08-01, 09:54 AM
** Get banned from playing half-orcs due to excessive shenanigans with chemistry, physics, and engineering.

2015-08-01, 10:05 AM
74 - Buy a large quantity of chalk before your adventure. Emblazon your poetic vision across the pristine canvas of the dungeon walls.

2015-08-01, 10:11 AM
74 (A) - Draw chalk silhouettes around the corpses of the monsters you kill. Bonus points if you get out the police tape.

2015-08-01, 06:30 PM
*75: Use the Create Water (Create Food & Drink, etc.) spell in a cold climate to replicate the Grease spell.
*76: Use a Decanter of Endless Water in a cold climate to ice over the bridge to the fort you're defending.
*77: Use a Decanter of Endless Water in a cold climate to create a skating rink.
*78: Use Create Water or a Decanter of Endless Water in a cold climate or coupled with Ray of Frost to burst a lock or crack stone.

The Fury
2015-08-01, 09:48 PM
*79: Give major NPCs, (or other PCs,) nicknames! Bonus points if you can get other PCs to use your nicknames-- extra bonus points if the DM uses them.

*80: Announce your character actions in song. For example, you cast Otto's Irresistible Dance? You could sing, "You can dance if you want to / you can leave your friends behind..."

2015-08-02, 06:23 AM
81: Sacrifice your character for the sake of the party by going solo against impossible odds.
82: Sacrifice your character for the sake of random NPCs by going solo against impossible odds.

2015-08-02, 06:28 AM
Use creative roleplaying to explore aspects of your personality in a safe environment.

2015-08-02, 06:40 AM
83 - Sacrifice your party for the sake of escaping with the awesome artifact. (Meh, they can make more characters, but there will never be a better chance to snatch the Head of Vecna.)

2015-08-02, 01:00 PM
-Get arrested for general Amoral behavior; even if you havenít committed any actual crimes.
84a. Get arrested for a crime that kills 20+ NPCs and burns down three houses yet can only be described as "jaywalking with malicious intent"
b. (In 2nd AD&D) play a character with a natural 4 CHA. Wear a paper bag over your head with mismatched eyeholes. Interrogate people by threatening to take it off.
c. Get arrested for provoking bar fights just to avoid paying 1 gp for lodging for the night.
d. Provide a distraction for the party's heist by walking into the center of a busy market, mugging the pie vendor, climbing atop his stand, scream "I AM THE KING OF PIES!" and pelt anyone nearby with pastries.
e. Save a farmer's house from an attack by bloodthirsty cultists. Then break into his house and turn his kitchen table into a desecrated altar (using the deceased cultists) to the very same power the cultists worshiped.
f. Determine if walls are illusions by charging at them, head lowered and eyes closed.
-Determine that the walls are, in fact, real.

2015-08-02, 04:41 PM
* Become a god with a 10ft. pole as favoured weapon/holy symbol
** godhood itself optional with bonus points. A nuber of followers considering 10ft. poles to be divine objects will do

2015-08-03, 12:04 AM
85 Play a Bard the uses Perform (tea ceremony). For extra credit, take Dragonfire Inspiration, or be a Dirgesinger.

Lord Raziere
2015-08-03, 12:47 AM
86. kill that optimizing munchkin's character, and get away with it.
87. solve something through pure roleplaying that optimizing munchkin never could
88. play a good-aligned succubus who has been inducted to work as a spy from heaven
89. play a blind uchiha with good taijutsu and ninjutsu
90. a Sidereal that can fly by dodging the ground.