How to propel every living creature in the world into space (TO, silly)

[Jormengand]

This is a really stupid trick and requires you to be 16th-level. But it's fun.

Have a gander at this (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showsinglepost.php?p=19424498&postcount=475).

Take a look at the stone plinth grapple trick. Now notice that the plinth isn't actually necessary for it. All you need is some way of putting creatures in your own square and those around it, and you can teleport, which helps this enormously. You have to be able to do this as a free action, or the trick is pointless. What better way to do it than...I think most of us know how the commoner chicken trick works. But, in case you don't...

Dragon Magazine issue 330 contains the "Chicken Infested" flaw, which means that whenever you try to draw anything, you have a 50% chance to draw a live chicken instead. Combine this with your choice of method of drawing infinite items (for example, the spell component pouch can be drawn from as a free action)

Now, all you need to do is fill as many squares around you as possible with the damned things, and then move.It had to involve kobolds, now, didn't it?

Now, Kobolds get to pretend they're true dragons, meaning that they can take epic feats early. Woo. The epic feat we're looking at is Distant Shot. Now, the spot requirement still makes you have to be 17th level (We can get our DEX that high by then by reading about how to be dexterous and also just by leveling up). However, needing to be 17th level is a bit of a drag, so we're going to take the Primary Contact (Heroic) feat from cityscape. Heroic gives us a single rank in Spot, and specifies that it allows us to go over the limit. Which is cool.The truenamer utterance Sensory Focus gives you blindsight with no range limit. The truenamer utterance Archer's Eye allows you to ignore cover and concealment. Both are available by level 14, so you're safe taking commoner 1/truenamer 14/whatever gives you spot and some skill ranks 1Okay, so, what you do is, you drop a chicken. Then another one. And another. And another. And as each one stands up from prone, they're shunted into the next available space. They start off in adjacent spaces, but as you spawn more and more, they start moving further and further afield to find a free space to stand in. Soon, every space in existence which did not already have a creature in it now contains a chicken.

Now, lob a chicken into the space of every creature who remains (this may take a while - we recommend some kind of TWF, only with thrown chickens, and bringing a buttload more kobold truenamer/commoners). Now, every space, creature or no creature, has a chicken in. There are no legal spaces on the entire planet for someone to stand. Whenever someone who can't fly moves, they are immediately shunted into the closest legal space they could occupy, even if it's not on the same planet. They probably end up on the moon or something. Then you cover that with chickens too...

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you put every nonflying creature in existence on Mars. You're welcome.

[Troacctid]

Problem.


In general, when the characters aren’t engaged in round-by-round combat, they should be able to move anywhere and in any manner that you can imagine real people could. A 5-foot square, for instance, can hold several characters; they just can’t all fight effectively in that small space. The rules for movement are important for combat, but outside combat they can impose unnecessary hindrances on character activities.

I think instead of teleporting people involuntary, all you've done is make combat functionally impossible.

[Extra Anchovies]

Whenever someone who can't fly moves, they are immediately shunted into the closest legal space they could occupy, even if it's not on the same planet.

And? The closest legal space is 5 feet above their head. To get people to start appearing on the moon, you'll need to layer the earth with chickens until the chickens are just barely outside the point where the moon's gravity would pull a creature to its surface.

[Nifft]

I think instead of teleporting people involuntary, all you've done is make combat functionally impossible.

Peace through chickens.

[atemu1234]

Peace through chickens.(TM)

Fixed that for you.

[Bronk]

Maybe you could just turn the planet into a chicken...

[Der_DWSage]

...I'm now horribly tempted to whip up a quick Cookie Clicker-esque game to simulate this trick. You awful person.

[Jormengand]

I think instead of teleporting people involuntary, all you've done is make combat functionally impossible.

Yeah, but if I hit someone with a chicken, it's hard to argue that they're not "In combat", and the same is true of all the chickens that I just used as thrown splash (:smalleek:) weapons.

Also, you can see every last living creature in the galaxy. Just engage them all in combat for the funnies.


And? The closest legal space is 5 feet above their head. To get people to start appearing on the moon, you'll need to layer the earth with chickens until the chickens are just barely outside the point where the moon's gravity would pull a creature to its surface.

There's nothing stopping me doing that. Also, perpetual motion: Because I can.


...I'm now horribly tempted to whip up a quick Cookie Clicker-esque game to simulate this trick. You awful person.

"So by paying 100 chickens, I can get another commoner to produce more chickens for me..." :smalltongue:

[Ashtagon]

Below a certain size class, multiple creatures can occupy a single space. I'm fairly confident that this applies to chickens.

[Jormengand]

Below a certain size class, multiple creatures can occupy a single space. I'm fairly confident that this applies to chickens.

Yes, but only a quantised number can fit in one square:


Very small creatures take up less than 1 square of space. This means that more than one such creature can fit into a single square. A Tiny creature typically occupies a space only 2½ feet across, so four can fit into a single square. Twenty-five Diminutive creatures or 100 Fine creatures can fit into a single square.

[Bronk]

However, too many chickens and you get the dreaded 'Chicken Swarm'!

[Rijan_Sai]

...I'm now horribly tempted to whip up a quick Cookie Clicker-esque game to simulate this trick. You awful person.


"So by paying 100 chickens, I can get another commoner to produce more chickens for me..." :smalltongue:

I would play this. This must exist!

[Troacctid]

RAW doesn't provide a mechanism to slap someone with a chicken, and even if you tried to get them into combat, they couldn't pop into a different square without moving, and since they can't move through squares occupied by the chickens, they can't move.

Also, the chickens probably aren't in combat, so they don't occupy their squares as combatants would.

[Jormengand]

RAW doesn't provide a mechanism to slap someone with a chicken, and even if you tried to get them into combat, they couldn't pop into a different square without moving, and since they can't move through squares occupied by the chickens, they can't move.

Also, the chickens probably aren't in combat, so they don't occupy their squares as combatants would.

The real question is, how do we know the chickens aren't in combat?

Bear in mind that there are 4 chickens squabbling over every 5-foot square, and then some. They're gonna be "In combat" super fast, and anyone caught up in the middle will be in combat too. And go flying off into space.

[Kazyan]

Were I to write an adventure module in which the party goes into a dungeon to fight three dragons and one of their half-dragon offspring, this would still be the most D&D 3.5 thing I've ever read.

[Heliomance]

RAW doesn't provide a mechanism to slap someone with a chicken, and even if you tried to get them into combat, they couldn't pop into a different square without moving, and since they can't move through squares occupied by the chickens, they can't move.

Also, the chickens probably aren't in combat, so they don't occupy their squares as combatants would.

That just means you need to pull some size shenanigans to fit Fling Ally in there then.

[Troacctid]

Also, how do you stop the chickens from forming a swarm, thus allowing them to share their space with other creatures? According to Tome of Magic p88, a flock of birds of tiny or diminutive size can form a swarm, using the same statistics as a murder of crows. (Interestingly, the resulting swarm has a fly speed, even if the individual birds didn't, but that's probably not relevant to this thread.)

[Nifft]

Also, how do you stop the chickens from forming a swarm, thus allowing them to share their space with other creatures? According to Tome of Magic p88, a flock of birds of tiny or diminutive size can form a swarm, using the same statistics as a murder of crows. (Interestingly, the resulting swarm has a fly speed, even if the individual birds didn't, but that's probably not relevant to this thread.)

Imagine if someone with Dark Speech used it to create a planetary chicken hivemind.

Then, everyone on Earth might suddenly find themselves in combat... but swarms don't eject you when they share your square.

[atemu1234]

Imagine if someone with Dark Speech used it to create a planetary chicken hivemind.

Then, everyone on Earth might suddenly find themselves in combat... but swarms don't eject you when they share your square.

I now know how the apocalypse will occur.