The Rock [Plot]

[Shadow of the Sun]

Too the casual observer, space, the ultimate penumbra, isn't that interesting. In fact, it looks quite like someone sprinkled glitter into a pool of ink.

Of course, it only gets interesting when you use more focus.

And now, let us zoom in from this infinite spectacle where everything can happen, to somewhere where everything does.

Ca-Click.

To the casual observer now, there would be no practical difference. To the educated, interested observer, there would be a slight difference- a difference in star placement here, a missing star there. Still not enough focus.

Ca-Click

Now, we reach the point where the casual observer may notice the difference; the stars all look bigger now, and you can spot identifiable galaxies. However, our path takes us even closer.

Ca-Click.

We are now focused on a single galaxy. It is a swirling, beautiful thing, housing many wonders and many profanities, many wondrous beings and many vile ones. But our path does not end here. It takes us closer.

Ca-Click.

Our focus is now a quadrant. Individual stars can now be seen, and the interested mind can speculate what wonders they hold, what peoples each houses. And yet again we walk our path, leading us closer.

Ca-Click.

We now observe a sector. Now not only can stars bee seen, large planets can be also. It is at this point the normal mans mind would begin to warp; to accept the existence of such a thing takes legendary wisdom.

Ca-Click.

And now, in one glorious moment, we see a solar system in all of it's glory. Large planets, small planets, satellites, moons, and for some reason an extra-terrestrial penguin can be seen. Our view gazes to a particular planet, and focuses further.

Ca-Click.

On this planet we see many things, oceans, deserts, and most surprising at all, life. Of all the planets in the galaxy, why should this one have life? Because the gods chose it so? Because Fate is playing tricks? Who knows, unless we move in even further.

Ca-Click.

We are now focused on an unusual town, which contains a variety of beings from a variety of places, all with one thing that binds them, a restless spirit and a roving mind. Should your eyes be able to see through matter, you will see women cooking, children playing, couples doing...couplie-things. And should your eyes be even further attuned, you may be able to see tangents of reality off from the normal one. However, let your gaze slide...

Ca-Click.

Our focus is now not on the town, but millions of miles away. A speck, in the grand scheme of things less significant than a flake of skin, may be seen to move. It is known as The Rock. And it is on a collision course with our planet, and indeed our town.

This is how the world ends. Not with a whimper but a bang.

[Shadow of the Sun]

A mere speck compared to it's grand backdrop, the Rock, a bringer of destruction, is more than 13 miles around. Moving at an incredible speed, it has plowed through many a planet before and will do so again. It is too far away to be seen with the naked eye, however, it will cause a magical disturbance to those who are attuned to such things.

And it draws ever closer, the seconds ticking away, and it must be stopped before it reaches the Town.

[brains?]

Somewhat unrelated to the ultimate harbinger of doom, but following a simlair course (though exceeding the speed of said rock by at least factor one hundred) is a translucent golden bubble of energy, about twice the side of a horse-draw carriage. Its surface swirls, and inside stands a man dressed in green flowing robes and a smaller, squatter man in bizzare, shiny armour. The armour appears to be the source of the bubble, a projection from the arm piece meeting the bubble at what would be considered "the top", if one takes the orientation of green-cloak and space-man to be true.

[Dartonus]

A large spot of blackness begins to shift towards the town as well.
The mortiverse is now on the move.

[J_Muller]

A large spot of blackness begins to shift towards the town as well.
The mortiverse is now on the move.

((...that's cheating.))


Near the southern pole of the primary satellite of the planet the Town resides on, observers have detected the approach of the giant interstellar mass. A priority report is sent. The situation is considered. Plans are drawn up.

For those who have lived so long in shadow, their hour may soon be at hand.

[Destro_Yersul]

((...that's cheating.))

((So no bringing in my giant covenant armada then? Because I've got one))

[J_Muller]

((So no bringing in my giant covenant armada then? Because I've got one))

((I was only being half serious there...

But a covenant armada should be fine. The Mortiverse destroys reality simply by entering this plane of existence.


EDIT: It occurs to me that due to the potentially world-altering nature of this plot, it would be a good idea to make sure everyone knows about it. Because while I'm in favor of letting it hit and making this into an event that results in a massive upheaval and reshapes The Town, others might not be.))

[Goblin Music]

GM and Dall appear on a rooftop in the town. Dall mouths a very horrid curse and hands a watch like object to GM they hit the surface of what would be the face an an interesting field appears around each of them
Shall we?
Heck yea!
We must warn the KNAVES first however
yes we must Dall vanishes
GM watches the impending doom rock

[Destro_Yersul]

((Woo! Armada!))

A rupture in space time appears in the fabric of reality over town. A large ship slides out of the hole, closely followed by another. More holes appear as more ships slide into being, their plasma drives lighting up the blackness of space. On the bridge of the Flagship stands a man wearing olive drab combat armour. Are we close enough to tell what the contact on the scopes is yet?
Negative sir. Long range scanners still aren't picking up more than a blip. Sending out slipspace probes now.
A number of small objects jettison from one of the docking bays. Miniature holes open up for them to pass through, and they are gone.
Probes away. Next orders sir?
The armoured man turns, his expression hidden behind a reflective gold faceplate.
Now we wait.

[Shadow of the Sun]

Ca-Click.

We have now moved out of focus, able to see our speck on the backdrop as it approaches our planet.

It will be here soon.

From best estimates, there will be 40 days until it hits.

It's presence on those with magical skill will now increase, from an ominous feeling to an unexplainable feeling of dread.

[Dartonus]

The mortiverse reaches his cheetos bag and eats it, returning to his home plane.
Didn't say what he was moving to. :D

[Destro_Yersul]

Scopes have cleared sir, and we've got the data back from those probes.
Go ahead. What is it?
It's a large rock. Goes impossibly fast. Most of the probes were shredded when they got close. Estimated time till impact is forty days.
So we've got time then. Good. Send out a code red on the high alert frequency. I want the Penitent Tangent, Insufferable Arrogance... whatever we've got, get it here.[/I]
Yes sir.
The officer keys in a command and a high frequency alert goes out, flashing across space in an instant. It will take time to reach its destination, and more time for anything that picks it up to get here. But it will come, and that's the important thing.

[brains?]

I want the Penitent Tangent, Insufferable Arrogance

((Surely not an Iain M Banks fan))

The Golden Blobe swings around the asteroid a few times, building up momentum before boosting slightly and hurtling off towards the town. It phases trhough the armada ships before reaching 0.99 and disappearing in a flare of relativity.

[AmberVael]

The Dancing Man appears on top of the rock, tapping his cane on it.
The rock randomly gains sentience and asks:
Have you heard of this "Town?"

"Yes rock...and you don't stand a chance there."

Why not?

"Because...Town is a very special place,
filled with very special people,
people who can fight and cast spells, often at the same time!
They are a different people, a multi-talented people,
a people...who need players...and who are, in many ways, the
luckiest people in...the world. I'm sorry rock, but you don't stand a chance."

But why?

"Well...let me put it like this."

The Dancing Man cues the music. Apparently he is on a musical roll this week, and he starts off singing slowly, more narrating than singing.

"In any great adventure,
if you don't want to lose-
victory depends upon the people that you choose.
So, listen, rock dear darling, closely to my plea:
You won't succeed in Town,
If you don't become a PC.

"You may have the finest plot,
Write the description up alot,
You may have the loveliest ideas that you choose.
You may dance and you may sing,
But I'm sorry, rocky king,
You'll hear no cheers,
Just lots and lots of boos."

The Dancing Man turns to the audience of dancing, flying, purple powerade bottles which, on cue, boo at the rock.
He then turns back to the rock and starts dancing, looking down at it.

"You may have have avatars by the score
Which the players do adore,
You may even from rules be set free-
Though you've personality instead,
You may bring a bit of dread,
But I tell you, you are dead,
If you aren't a PC."

The Dancing Man does a neat little tapping flutter while a clarinet player pops out of nowhere and plays a tiny part. The Dancing Man then points directly at the plot, despite the fact that it isn't an object or something in space.

"They won't care if it's witty,
or everything looks pretty,
They'll simply say it's sh*tty and refuse.
Nobody will die, sir,
If you're not important then no show, sir,
Even I won't be dim enough to lose!
Put on shows that make them stare,
Lots of power and lots of flair,
You may even have the largest number of views-"

The Dancing Man points to a bunch of rabid fans with way too large glasses who all exclaim at once:
You're doing great!
-before he keeps singing and dancing.

"The players won't care, sir,
As long as you don't dare, sir,
To open up in Town
If you aren't a player character!"

The Dancing Man goes into a solo tapdance on top of a unicycle while playing the trombone before tossing the trombone away and riding around on the unicycle.
The powerade bottles have formed a dance line in the mean time, and the rabid fanboys are doing cartwheels and backflips.
A line of mermaids has shown up and are playing trumpets as he continues singing.

"You may have dramatic writing,
Or lots of horrid fighting,
You may even have some temples cry the news!
The players may be nice boys
But sadly we're just toys,
And that plot that you call frightning you will lose.

"So, despite your pretty sights,
and descriptive writer staying up long nights,
and the most impressive action that you use...
You may have enchantments and a spell,
You may bring a lord from hell,
But the people will just stay well
If you aren't a PC!"

A devil and a master archmage appear in a flash of fire and shrug, saying 'it's true' before joining the dance line.

"You may fill your plot with peril,
Have the characters all turn feral,"

A crowd of gnomish illusionists appear and sing as they make their own dance line.

You may even have some illusionists hiding thee!

"They just won't care or flee,
If you don't become a PC,
Nothing else will matter, don't you see?

"There's a very small percentile,
Whose death won't make them anile,
I'm sad to say that their will is free!
But never mind the swordplay,
You just won't succeed in Town,
You just won't succeed in Town,
If you aren't a PC!"

"Rocky, can you hear me?"

The Dancing Man stops dancing and starts walking off into space as the various dancers start receding.

"To get along in Town,
To make an impact in Town
To hit the people and stay free,
I tell you, Rocky king,
There is one essential thing...
You simply must be, simply must be a PC."

He stops and turns, point at the rock with his cane.

"You simply must be,
Rock just trust me,
Simply must be PC."

The Dancing Man vanishes with a pop.

((Credits to Spamalot for the song "You Won't Succeed on Broadway" which inspired this))

[ufo]

Koty stares in the sky at the massive rock approaching. "It's... beautiful!" His eyes open a-wide.

Suddenly he looks calmed again. "Even though I'm not sure how to do this. First plot.." He feels a large kick in his stomach and he falls over. He hears the fourth wall yelling at him.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Vespe suddenly gets a flicker in his mind. He looks up at the sky. He turns to his player, who is crashed on the couch.
It's time.
Really?
Yes. The Apocalypse is upon us. The signs have all fallen into place, and The Rock is on it's way.
Well it's about time. Well, shall we unleash Chaos?
I thought you'd never ask.
Vespe and his player open a gate to the elemental Plane of Chaos, unleashing pure chaos into the world.

[darkblade]

Er'n walks down the street suddenly filled with a sense of overwelming doom. The ancient elven scriptures say the end of reality will come in what had been much debated by elven scholars but certainly sooner than most other races beleive possibly in as little as forty days.

[Destro_Yersul]

How long do we have?
Thirty eight days sir. We've recieved word from the Penitent Tangent. They're on route and should arrive within the next couple of days.
And the Insufferable Arrogance?
Still no word. We've got the distress beacon active on all frequencies. Anything that can hear it should be making its way here as we speak.
What's our current status? I need to know what we've got and what we can expect to arrive soon enough to affect the battle.
The officer turns to his console, calling up the schematics for the fleet. We've got the Flagship, of course. We've also got four carriers, six destroyers and a detachment of frigates. One of the Supercruisers is on the way, as is the Penitent Tangent. That's it for the covenant tech.
UNSC?
Not so much. A few Halcyon class cruisers and a carrier. Most of our UNSC was cannibalized for the Omega class superheavy cruisers.
Damn. Well, we'll put up what fight we can. This world will be destroyed over my dead body. Athena, the ship AI, chimes in inside the armoured man's helmet. I hope that wasn't a prophecy. The man smiles behind his faceplate. We'll see Athena. We'll see...

[Dartonus]

Sha'rall Greater Plane Shifts to the rock.
Brilliant. I wonder if there are Alien corpses in this rock?
He attempts to disintegrate some of it.

[Shadow of the Sun]

A small portion of the Rock gets disintegrated, but nothing of consequence.

The Rock continues on it's path, like the fist of an angry god.

[Dartonus]

Sha'rall Grins.
YES! DIE ROCK!
He laughs maniacally and uses up higher level spell slots to unleash as many widened Disintegrates as he can. As he is from the land of Revlen, one of the most advanced multiverses out there (Magically speaking), this is quite a lot.
Revlen's epic spellcasting rules coming soon!

[Shadow of the Sun]

The rock, still moving, has it's outer layer removed. Exposing it's bulk: a material that reflects magic. This means Revlan may be in for a shock.

If the Rock had a mind, personality and a face, it would be looking very smug.

[Dartonus]

Sha'rall's tentacles begin to produce the enzymes that all illithids produce. He begins to try to dissolve it.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The rock does get a tiny bit dissolved, however, there is barely anything of consequence done.

It is going to take a massive amount of non-magical force to get rid of it.

The Rock would now be grinning in an evil fashion.

[Dartonus]

Sha'rall sighs and opens a portal to his plane where 8 hours happens in a round. He goes through it to ponder his next move.
I love genesis.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock, not having any of this, stops the magic.

It is being a rather large prick.

[Dartonus]

Sha'rall gets ticked off and uses the rock as a springboard to kick off from, heading for the town.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock would be looking smug and self satisfied again, if it had a face or brain. That'll show them for trying to stop me!

[Dartonus]

Sha'rall is back in the town now.

[Destro_Yersul]

Meanwhile, back near Town....

A slipspace rupture opens up a short distance from the main covenant fleet. A massive ship slides out of the hole in space time. It's big. Really big. No, bigger than that. The ship dwarfs the other ships in the covenant fleet, eclipsing even the mighty supercarriers. It sports a full six Magnetic Accelerator Cannons, twenty heavy plasma turrets and hundreds of smaller turrets. Its complement of launch bays is packed with seraphs, longswords and phantom dropships. It moves slowly towards the rest of the fleet, curving in a wide arc to face the rock. The Penitent Tangent has arrived.

[blackout]

((And no one tells the sci-fi freak. :smallannoyed: Ah, well.))

The mercenary base-ship Blackout Raider is recieving a shipment of technology from the Terran Dominion of the Koprulu Sector.
Excellent, excellent. These SCVs and Goliath Walkers will be useful.
"Sir, massive unidentified contact. Looks like a rock of some kind."
Lemme see...
Nukular looks at the viewscreen...and sees the rock.
....I hate my job sometimes.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock speeds on, considerably closer than it was.

((Due to the floating timeline of the Town this thing could hit anywhen.))

[Destro_Yersul]

((Crap. Let's try making it not hit then, hmm?))

Athen, get me firing solutions for the entire fleet. I want to impact the rock at an angle on the right side. If we can't stop it or destroy it, we might be able to send it off course. At very least, this should take a decent chunk of the thing with it.
Working. Shouldn't take long... got it.
Good. Send that to all ships on a narrow band coded transmission, and tell them to stand by.
Done.
Throughout the ships the crew springs into action. The fleet orients itself towards the rock, superconductive coils warming up silently. Robotic loaders insert huge MAC shells into the guns massive breaches in preparation for firing. Plasma turrets glow as they heat up and the armoured man smiles as he watches the rock on the viewscreen.
On my mark...
FIRE!
Guns thunder as the firing mechanisms slam back, sending superheavy MAC rounds streaking towards their target. Plasma lances across space, burning a path across the viewscreens of every ship in the fleet. The first shot has been fired. Now all they can do is wait and see.

[blackout]

Oh, man! The weaponsfire! The rock might break apart! Instead of one huge rock hitting the Town, we'll have hundreds of small ones! The damage would still be on a huge scale! Quickly! Put us in the path of the gunfire! Full shields! The Blackout Raider moves into the path of Destro's weaponsfire...

[Destro_Yersul]

((Which ship's weaponsfire? There is a rather sizable fleet doing the firing. Unless the Blackout Raider is quite large, it won't be able to block the fire from the entire fleet.))

Just for breakdown, here's what's been fired:

12 superheavy MAC rounds. Just one of these can go clean through a Covenant capital ship, shields and all.
roughly 20 regular MAC rounds. Takes three of these to hole a capital ship
50 large scale plasma torpedoes. These take out capital ship shields in one shot, but don't put holes through anything. They just incinerate most things they happen to hit.
70-100 plasma torpedoes. Takes two or three of these to get rid of the shields, otherwise same as large torpedoes, except smaller.

[blackout]

((The Blackout Raider is meant to be a base-ship for an army capable of dominating the galaxy. By itself. With no support other than other units in said army. The Blackout Raider is the main mobile HQ for the entire army. Trust me. It's BIG. And tough enough to survive through a sustained barrage of weaponsfire from most, if not all, potential attackers. A few hundred MAC rounds and plasma bursts ain't gonna stop it.))

"In position, sir!"
Patch me through.
"Yessir."
Attention Covenant battlefleet, this is General Nukular on the Blackout Raider. Cease fire!

[Destro_Yersul]

((Fair enough. Just wait for me to bring in the plasma lances once the rock gets closer :smallamused:))

Damnit, where the hell did he come from? Athena? Onscreen. The armoured man, helmet and all, should appear on whatever viewscreen type device Nukular has.
You may have noticed that we did so already. That volley was a calculated attack. We only needed one shot. May I ask why you have placed your ship in my line of fire?

[blackout]

That rock is on a collision course with the planet below us. If you were to hit it with that weaponsfire, it would have broken apart and the many pieces would've crashed through the atmosphere. They would've been dense and large enough to make it through intact, and chances are they would've caused plenty of destruction on the surface. Let's just say I'm keeping you from making a certain problem worse.

[Destro_Yersul]

That assumes I'm stupid enough to shoot at the center of the rock. I'm not, by the way. Allow me to demonstrate. The armoured man steps to the side, tapping a few controls. A holographic display pops up, showing the planet Town is on. The covenant fleet is shown in orbit, as is the Blackout Raider. The man taps a few more controls, and the Raider vanishes from the display.

Observe. Here is my fleet, here is the rock. The display zooms out far enough to show the Rock as well. I'll add in the firing solutions we just used. They'll have to be recalculated, of course, but here's where they were. A number of lines appear, all converging on a point somewhere to the front of the rock. The display suddenly unfreezes, holographic projectiles streaking towards thier destination.

Now, here is what would have happened had you not messed with my plan. As the rock gets closer to Town, the volley from the armoured man's fleet connects, striking a point off to one side of the rock. The rock splits into two pieces, as well as a number of smaller fragments, each no bigger than the average comet. The two large fragments are spinning erratically, their momentum carrying them gradually further from each other.

As each nears the town, it is clear that both will miss the planet, though not by a large margin. So you see, nothing bigger than a Chihuahua's head would have actually reached the planet. Of course, by now the rock will have reached a point where those firing solutions will no longer work, and a new plan will have to be formulated. Thanks for messing with my one window of opportunity. Next time you want to put your ship in the way of something, I suggest the Rock.

[blackout]

...Oh. Carry on then. The massive ship moves out of the way.

[Destro_Yersul]

Thank you. Athena, new firing solutions. Let's re-load and try that again. You in the exceptionally large ship, you are welcome to add your likely considerable firepower to our own. The armoured man taps a few more controls, and a circular opening appears on the panel in front of him. Would you like me to send you a firing solution?

((Yeah, fDestro gets more than a little annoyed when things like that happen. No offense meant to you, of course))

[blackout]

Actually, my ship has an abnormally powerful tractor beam...we could just, y'know, throw the rock at another planet...or something.

[Destro_Yersul]

Have to be pretty damn strong to stop something that fast. Should probably try slowing it down first. Or breaking it into slightly more manageable chunks. With that in mind, I'm trying this again. Firing solutions are once-more online. The fleet reorients and fires as one. MAC rounds and plasma torpedoes streak across space, aiming to break the rock into two pieces and/or deflect it enough that it misses Town.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock, is, however, powered by sheer drama, and as such, will survive if it is more dramatic to do so.

The rounds do nothing at all.

[Destro_Yersul]

((Fine then. Have fun with this one:)))

Well that did absolutely jack squat. Allright then. Full auto, all power to weapons. The armoured man jams his gauntlet into the circular opening on the panel in front of him. Let's get this party started. The fleet begins firing, plasma weapons only. The first volley is largely insignificant, given the size of the fleet. Then time stops. The armoured man looks up from his control panel at the viewscreen, watching the ships blaze away. The shots, however, go nowhere. All time outside the ships has ceased to move. Globs of plasma collect directly outside the turrets that just fired them. After what seems like an eternity, the fleet stops firing. The man looks at the viewscreen, at the rock, and at the hundreds of millions of plasma torpedoes collected in front of his fleet.

Showtime. He pulls the gauntlet back out of the opening, and time resumes in a flash. Said hundreds of millions of plasma torpedoes lance across space, heading straight at the rock.

The impact of a plasma torpedo, it could be noted, does not cause something to blow up. It melts it. Most things that get hit are simply boiled away into space, cooling to nothing due to the emptiness of a vacuum. Of course, it's concievable that the massive strain put on something by being superheated and then rapidly cooled would simply cause it to shatter into loads of pieces...

[Rebonack]

Somewhere Maph'tey begins to swear as the universe suddenly halts while he's still moving forward in time. It's rather like what would happen if a car suddenly stops with someone surfing on the roof.

With an indigent grumble he begins to swim back down the time-stream to meet up with the universe, ready to give it a piece of his mind once he finds it.

[Shadow of the Sun]

If the Rock had a face, it would be grinning. Like someone who's opponent has all the aces, but now they aren't playing cards.

It reflects every damn shot.

The Rock speeds on, quite happily. If it had a brain, it would be thinking that it's job will be over soon.

[Destro_Yersul]

Ok. That's just not nice. Screw it. The armoured man hits a single control. One single MAC round drops into the breach. One gun thunders, expelling it's charge out the front of the Covenant flagship. One shot. Hell, maybe one shot will do something. Better than wasting energy doing nothing at all.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The one shot hits, and leaves a 400 meter deep crater.

The Rock gives off an aura of offendedness.

[Destro_Yersul]

That... why did that work? Athena is laughing in the armoured man's head. Dramatic irony? You know, somehow I get the feeling that it won't work again. Why don't you try it and see? The man shrugs.Why not? So he hits the control again. One more shot from one more gun. In an instant it is fired, no-one actually expecting that the same trick will work twice.

[Rebonack]

Unfortunately for the Rock Rebonack has detected a suitable level of silliness in this topic to employ none other than... Al!

A perfectly normal first level human commoner appears in the path of the cosmic sling stone.

[Shadow of the Sun]

It does hit, but it doesn't leave a crater. What it does, though, is reduces the Rock's momentum ever so slightly.

[Rebonack]

The commoner is upset that the rock ignored him, despite smashing against its surface with, in all likelihood, very little noticeable effect.

Another identical commoner appears in the rock's path. He would comment on how great of a day it is if not for the lack of air.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The commoner gets turned into a thin film of grease on the rocks surface.

[J_Muller]

Batman appears in the Rock's path, and makes a comment similar to what the commoner would have if not for the lack of air. Batman can breathe in space, you see.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock, employing 'I'm controlled by SotS-fu' turns Batman into a matching film of grease.

[J_Muller]

Luckily for comics, there is a sudden retcon in which Batman survives the impact somehow, and the world is able to retain its caped crusader.

[Warpfire]

Many came to try and stop the Rock...

One came to help it...

"WOOO!!" Warpfire cries gleefully as he teleports in, sitting atop the Rock and grinning like a madman. He considers how best to aid the magic-resistant rock in its destruction of the Town. He doesn't seem to particularly mind the number of problems that would normally occur from sitting on a meteor.

[Destro_Yersul]

The luggage appears on the rock. It wanders around, glaring at the rock and looking for Rincewind.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock would sigh. This is going to be the Dancing Man all over again, isn't it? It would ask the universe. Too bad it doesn't have a brain.

[Rebonack]

More commoners appear in front of the Rock.

Two of them this time.

They would be arguing about what makes this particular day so great if not for the lack of air.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The two commoners are on a collision course with The Luggage.

Nothing happens to Warpfire.

[Destro_Yersul]

The luggage eats the random commoners and continues on its merry way. After ascertaining that a: Rincewind is not on the rock, and b: the rock is not edible, it leaves for parts unknown.

[Warpfire]

Warpfire, so far unable to find anyway to help the Rock destroy the world without using magic, attempts to set the whole thing ablaze. He doesn't really expect much. "Worth a try, though..."

[Shadow of the Sun]

The magic is itself reflected back at him.

[Rebonack]

Four more are spat out into the multi-verse by the Al Continuum, still interposed between the world ending projectile and the Town.

Is there an end to them?

Not really.

[Warpfire]

A huge ball of fire explodes around Warpfire as the magic is reflected. Which he doesn't particularly mind, what with his ring of fire immunity.

"Hmm...what now?" He looks down at the Rock, half-hoping it will tell him.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock says nothing, as four commoners smash into Warpfire.

[Warpfire]

Warpfire waves a hand, and the commoners go flying off into the vacuum before they can hit him. He gets bored and disappears.

[Chaotic Bob]

A whale and a potted petunia all appear in front of the rock.
"Oh no not again!" thinks the petunia as a ship zips past...

[Rebonack]

Rebonack hmms a bit before hurling a kitchen sink at the Rock.

He then explodes in a shower of white and blue pixels as he often does.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The Rock develops a mouth and swallows the kitchen sink, lamenting the loss of any seriousness it may have had

[Rebonack]

"We've tried everything," comes the disembodies voice of Rebonack. "From musical numbers to massive volleys of high energy naval weapons. We've thrown everything and the kitchen sink at it to no effect."

The voice takes on a concerned tone.

"I believe it may be equipped... With a Plot shield. Nothing can stop it until exactly one second before impact, as is always the case in these situations."

[Shadow of the Sun]

A voice replies, offhandedly. Oh, this rock is going to fry...it just needs some coaxing. The exact right amount of non-magical force, in fact.

[Chaotic Bob]

Godzilla appears! Armed with a specially formatted jetpack! It looks at the rock threatening his territory and charges up his energy breath...

[J_Muller]

((Godzilla=Win.))

On the moon orbiting Planet Town, the Fourth Empire readies some defense systems to prepare to defend their newly acquired territory in The Town.

[Shadow of the Sun]

Frankly, I'm disappointed...no-one has made a Final Fantasy 7 joke yet. The fourth wall gets kicked in the teeth. This is going to end well, boys, but not just yet.

[Rebonack]

"Well, you know, why the hell not? We've tried everything else."

The cobalt knight then begins to cast Holy to stop the black materia once and for all.

[Shadow of the Sun]

I was hoping for something slightly more subtle, but why not? The rock slows for a second, and then does nothing. Good work, you now have three more days.

[Chaotic Bob]

Godzilla doesn't really care about all this random speech and just releases the energy beam that it intends to defend its territory with.

[J_Muller]

He is joined by Batman, in the Space-Bat-Mobile. Which has an open cockpit, because Batman can breathe in space. Do not question how. He's the Goddamn Batman.

The SBM fires Space-Batman-Missiles at the Rock.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The rock uses the ultimate power of the handwave to avoid being damaged. For now. You know, I seriously doubt if I'll ever get this damn thing any where near close enough to hit.

[Rebonack]

"Huh... I'm surprised I didn't get skewered by-"

*SHLUNK*

A rather long sword suddenly protrudes from Rebonack's chest.

"Ah, ok, there it is."

He then slumps over and dies such that a Fenix Down can't raise him.

[Shadow of the Sun]

Thanks for that. However, you are 5x10^82 times more awesome than Sephiroth, so you get to live.

[Chaotic Bob]

Godzilla prepares to grapple with the rock, but it suddenly realizes that Mothra is terrorizing Tokyo! Only Godzilla is allowed to destroy Tokyo! Godzilla zooms off again to combat Mothra...



DeBunny shakes his head at this poor thread.

[Shadow of the Sun]

Durante/Shadow of the Sun pulls up a seat, and smiles sadly. She had such potential.

[blackout]

Ok, I'm really getting worried and sick of this. Arm tractor beam.
"Tractor beam armed, sir."
Lock on the rock.
"Locked."
And grab.
A long, thin, blue line of energy extends from the front of the Blackout Raider and touches the rock.
Now, let's see if we can't swing it towards Alpha Centauri.

[PirateMonk]

An image of PirateMonk appears, and creates an absurdly powerful Wall of Force in front of it. He probably had to sacrifice a few divine ranks to create it. He waits and watches to see the effect.

[Draken]

At the top of a fryggin' big tree, Draken stares at the big rock, and then speaks to his player.

Order Maxinus to shoot that thing with the Nullblasters of the castle.

How many of them?

All of them.

The player moves to the castle.

You heard it Maxinus.

I'm on it sir. #1600! Aim for that big rock in the space and NUKE IT OUT!!

Sir! Yes Sir! FIRE IN THE HOLE!!

The huge castle shoots thousands of large black orbs of pure nothing, the balls obliterate many things in their path, including little cute birds and smaller meteors, growing bigger every time.

(As you said, nothing :amused:.)


"I believe it may be equipped... With a Plot shield. Nothing can stop it until exactly one second before impact, as is always the case in these situations."

(Now we tryied everything and nothing. If this fail, we can still try something and anything)

[blackout]

Nukular comes out of dead-time. The ship re-fires the tractor beam

And....SWING!
The ship turns as fast as it can, and tries to throw the rock in another direction using the tractor beam.

[thehothead]

How big is the rock?

[blackout]

((Very big.))

[Draken]

(Freaking huge.

Where is SotS to say if the attacks work?)

[LordVader]

In orbit above Town, the Imperial Guard 53rd Battlegroup notices the asteroid, and the attempts to stop it.
Unidentified ships, this is the IG 53rd Battlegroup. Can we be of assistance?

[Draken]

A very large number of black spheres, whose darkness could make a Black Hole look... white pass throught the spaceships, heading to the Rock, nothing stops then, all that comes in touch disapears, and the spheres grow every time they destroy something.

[LordVader]

I say again, do you need assistance?
*Warships begin to vector towards asteroids, and launch small craft.*

[thehothead]

((What I'm trying to find out is what size of a rock I need to fling at it.))

[Gnrlshrimp]

((Simple, another ridiculously gigantic rock...))

[LordVader]

The flotilla of warships begins to fire their long-range lance arrays at the Rock. Massive explosions blossom on it's surface.

[Vhaidara]

A cheese wheel the size of the sun appears and starts hurtling on a collision course with the rock. Unfortunately, they'll collide after the rock hits the Earth.