LudicSavant
2015-09-27, 12:23 PM
Part of my ongoing series on the mythology of my world, where my goal was to take "classic" D&D gods and remake them into more complete religious ideologies people might actually want to worship. (See Wee Jas (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?450352-Wee-Jas-the-First-Lich&p=19941626), Corellon Larethian (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?461424-Corellon-Larethian-the-Architect-of-Blood-and-Seed&p=20098734), Nerull (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?443831-My-pantheon-s-take-on-Nerull), Erythnul (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?445290-Erythnul-the-Many&p=19869433&viewfull=1), Hextor (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?451475-My-pantheon-s-take-on-Hextor&p=19966308&viewfull=1), Lolth (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?480130-Lolth-Lady-Luck), The Deep Ones (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?448397-The-Deep-Ones-Twisted-Seas-and-Alien-Light))
Also, intended to be readable in any order, and for it to be easy to transplant individual parts into other settings.
Olidammara, The Laughing Rogue
http://orig01.deviantart.net/58cf/f/2014/135/0/3/follower_by_sheppard56-d7ihxmg.jpg (http://sheppard56.deviantart.com/art/Follower-454333048)
"I disagree. You want to bring back someone that you’ve lost. You might want money. Maybe you want women. Or, you might want to protect the world. These are all common things people want. Things that their hearts desire. Greed may not be good, but it’s not so bad, either. You humans think greed is just for money and power! But everyone wants something they don’t have."
- Greed, "Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood"
"The world doesn't belong to you! It belongs to ME!"
- Last words of Auleric the Swift, Paladin of Olidammara, before his legendary self-sacrifice.
Expanded Domains: Celerity, Chaos, City, Family, Greed, Halfling, Illusion, Knowledge, Kobold, Luck, Lust, Protection, Travel, Trickery
Portfolio: Adventure, Bards (different type than Corellon though), Beggars, Birthdays, Competitive Altruism (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showsinglepost.php?p=21245780&postcount=31), Daring, Desire, Gifts, Greed, Heyokas (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heyoka), Humor, Laughter, Materialism, Mischief, Music, Potlatches (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potlatch), Rogues, Romance, Street Performers, Thieves, Tricks, Vagabonds, Wine
Theme: http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=Fa31djbUeaw#Imagine_Dragons_On_Top_Of_World_Lyr ics, http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=zSCOYAJd2PE#Cage_the_Elephant_-_Ain_t_No_Rest_for_the_Wicked_[Lyrics]
Knowledge (Religion) DC 10:
Olidammara is the god of desire, associated with celebration, adventure, greed, romance, mischief, and scoundrels. He is a hedonistic trickster deity who encourages his followers to live life to the fullest, and revel in the joys the world has to offer... even if it means you sometimes have to take what you want without permission. His open encouragement of greed and mischief makes his followers unpopular in some societies.
In art, Olidammara is depicted as a split-faced figure with a twisted smile. One side of his visage is dark and mirthful, the other bright and serious. His symbol is the twisted mirror, representing self-interest as well as the sacred role of humor.
It is said that Olidammara invented wine as a gift for Moradin... which kept the Soul Forger distracted from his mischief.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 15:
Olidammara has a bit of a bad reputation, sometimes reviled as the "god of greed." If you ask Olidammara's followers, those stodgy priests of other deities are all just brainwashed by the divine establishment. What kind of real good god just wants you to be an ascetic, prostrating yourself before them, giving everything of yourself but getting nothing back? Olidammara actually wants to give his followers things. Real things! You deserve things! The world is yours for the taking! Seize the day and keep it! Heck, steal it if you have to. Any man who takes the effort to steal something himself (instead of systematically) probably wants it more than you anyways. And those stealing systematically make thievery necessary, because hey, there isn't enough good stuff to go around when guys like that are involved. Olidammara especially likes when you steal valuables from the wealthy, because then "nobody gets hurts, except for those insurance crooks."
To Olidammara's faithful, greed is not a sin, for it is desire that makes anything precious and sacred in the first place. Behind greed is a love of the fine things in life. Indulge your greed! Protect the fine things in life! Greed is greater than just a love of trinkets. Your mind and body are yours, so take care of them! Your friends are yours, so take care of them! Your society is yours, so take care of it! Your world is yours, so take care of it! In possessing all things, you will do right by all things, for only a fool would harm their own possessions. Possess it all, cherish it all, and take responsibility for it all! Fight for that which is precious to you. True strength comes from having something to protect. To one faithful to Olidammara, joy does not come from within, but rather it comes from that which you surround yourself with, so make everything around you good.
Some temples do collections via gambling, with parishioners betting on what curve the storyteller is going to throw in next to modify the parable they're preaching. It keeps the stories morphing while it also requires that the faithful actually know the dogma and the material. It also funds the temple in a way that's difficult to account for, allowing certain acquisitions to be explained away.
In fact, temples of Olidammara often pride themselves on "nobody falling asleep" during their services, which are often laden with music, entertainment (including things like ledgerdemain "magic" shows), games, and raucous storytelling. Pranks, too, are sacred, because things need to be stirred up from time to time to give life its proper spice.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 20:
Olidammaran scripture is updated far more often than most, or at least rarely quoted directly. Clergy are encouraged to mingle amongst temple visitors and relay Olidammara's teachings in plain language. Essentially, the exact opposite of old school Christianity requiring sermons to be given in Latin; Olidammara wants you to spread his message in the contemporary local style.
A core idea in Olidammaran dogma is that Olidammara does not like to be sacrificed to... at least not in the sense most other gods do. Indeed, his only hard and fast law is that none should ever bow to him. One re-telling of a classic myth phrased it thus: "Keep your stuff! I'm not the kind of god who wants you to be ascetic and just worship and sacrifice to him for nothing in return. Screw that noise. I don't want your lame mortal stuff anyways. I'm up here in the heavens with my sweet God bling, man. You wanna do right by me, just gimme a fun adventure story to tell. Go be the trickster hero of an epic poem or something. Teach someone something without letting them know it was you. Or whatever's your style. Hey man if I already knew the story I wanted to hear I would have written it myself."
Olidammara's gospel warns against merely intuiting your desires. Perceptions, even of ourselves, get all wrapped up in social norms, and as a god of humor he's all about subverting—and seeing past—the mess of habit and ingrained thought. An Olidammaran must look into the twisted mirror and find what they, personally, are truly greedy for.
For instance, while Olidammarans often emphasize that greed can be virtuous, being a miser is not, for a miser acts out of fear rather than desire. Following your desires, they say, doesn't mean -hoarding- everything. That's not how real greed works. The problem with misers is that they aren't greedy enough to spend all that money they've got! Gotta circulate that stuff to get anything that isn't a bunch of yellow pictures of old guys. Who wants a bunch of bad yellow pictures of old guys? That stuff only has value in circulation. They don't understand real greed. They are like a dragon, afraid of losing their pile of useless lucre that they sleep on to feel safe. That's not greed. That's insecurity. That's fear. Be brave! Get things! Deck ALL of the halls! Give the BEST present so that you look better than your friends!
In fact, Olidammara encourages holidays and celebrations that involve competitive altruism (such as potlatches) or focusing on a single person's desires (such as birthdays, a day all about you!). He also encourages followers to give away everything they own upon their deaths so that they'll treat your memory right (otherwise, what would your money be doing for you? Nothing! Gotta think of the self-interest!).
Despite what might on the surface appear to be fairly similar ideals, Olidammara often quarrels with Bahamut. He understands but disagrees with Tiamat, and tries to help her work through her paranoia issues. Heironeous sometimes tries to chew him out or set him straight, but Olidammara just laughs and likes to mess with him.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 25:
Olidammara is actually way older than some might expect, for he was born the first time a god felt desire, making him literally as old as want. One of the oldest known shrines to any god of the modern pantheon, known as the Burned Circle, honors Olidammara as an enlightened figure. Also noteworthy is the fact that Olidammara seems to show up in almost every culture of almost every intelligent race in the world, though worship of him is rarely dominant anywhere. In mythology, the other gods are occasionally surprised by his depth of experience, control, and wisdom, which seems like such a contrast with his youthful exuberance and mischief. Scholars can't seem to agree on what the first desire was (and Olidammara doesn't ever talk about his age, it is only ever implied), so there is some theological speculation of how old he really is... some even placing his birth back at the moment that Nerull first sought to create disparity. Despite his age, he's still only an intermediate deity, since he has never expanded his portfolio. He jokes that the one he started with keeps him too busy already.
Olidammaran faith has its roots in heyoka (ritual clown) traditions. To simply call a heyoka a fool does not do justice to their role. Heyokas carry the medicine of chaos. The heyoka is a sacred thief, robbing people of their over-seriousness, their anxieties, their preconceptions. The sacred role of the heyoka is to be a mirror, his backwards behavior exemplifying the very opposite of normal in order to give us a clearer understanding of how to act ourselves. In their antics we see our own imperfections revealed so that we might reflect, get unstuck, and evolve spiritually. Through showy displays of satire and blasphemy, heyokas create a cultural dissonance from which anxiety is free to collapse on itself into laughter.
Olidammara's black-and-white face represents the black and white paint of a heyoka. His split visage represents a twisted reflection in a sacred mirror.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 30:
The oral traditions of the Lokarrh proclaim that Gruumsh's first inspiration for a world without need for Corellon or Moradin came from one of Olidammara's heyoka performances. They also say that during Gruumsh's ill-fated rebellion, Olidammara sided with Corellon and Moradin, but his antics always screwed things up for his side, causing Corellon to lay suspicion on him and bring him before a council of judgment. A tipsy Moradin exonerated him, saying that you can't blame a ritual clown for being an oaf.
Nevertheless, some suspect that Olidammara is far more capable than he lets on, for he is a wise and ancient trickster. After all, some say that humor is a path to learning, and so Olidammara is at his core one of the gods of Knowledge.
Organization: The Motley Temple
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/50/68/a9/5068a93972385513893955f71a3a00e3.jpg (https://www.artstation.com/artist/joannawolska)
"Well, if you want to stay, you'll have to offer a donation to spruce the place up. Alms for yourself, really."
- Adlyn Altner, priestess of the Motley Temple.
The Motley Temple is named because it is decorated entirely with relics plundered from a variety of religions, kingdoms, and eras, supposedly all from legal dungeon delving. It is a proud patron of adventurers, but is often suspected of also being a base for a thieves guild. The knights of Heironeous shake the place down from time to time, but always come up with nothing while the head priest gives them her best winning smile and a rude gesture.
Many shake their heads and talk about it as a "hive of scum and villainy" populated by unscrupulous vagabonds and adventurers. The adventurers themselves, however, can find all of their needs met here, and an effective base of operations... so long as they make the appropriate donations to the temple's decor. The Motley Temple is frequented by middlemen who can connect you with just the magic item you want or find a place to offload a dragon's hoard, healers who can fix up that pesky petrification problem, oracles who can put you on track to your destination, a board full of job notices, or whatever an adventurer might need.
The religious services of the Motley Temple are highlighted by raucous storytelling, gambling, song and drink. Parishioners often bet on what curve the storyteller is going to throw in next to modify the parable they're preaching. It keeps the stories morphing while it also requires that the faithful actually know the dogma and the material if they want to get in on the game. It also funds the temple in a way that's difficult to account for, allowing many of the temple's acquisitions to be conveniently explained away. As a base of operations for adventurers, the temple's entertaining services also often include shows of martial, magical, or roguish skills, or stories of dungeon delves.
Organization: The Disciples of Yuehai
http://orig12.deviantart.net/693c/f/2008/084/3/7/warriors_by_roboto_kun.jpg (http://roboto-kun.deviantart.com/art/warriors-80905102)
"You, who sang down the walls of the Spired City and slew the Bright Emperor. Are you worthy of my desire?"
- Yuehai the Wanderer
When asked, "who is the strongest fighter in the world?" many would reply "Yuehai, the Wanderer." A legendary crusader of Olidammara, Yuehai is greedy for only one thing: The challenge of a worthy opponent, met in single combat. The legendary wanderer traveled the world, mastering the world's fighting styles and besting the champions of each region he visited. He traveled to lands so distant that none had heard of his homeland, all in search of opponents worthy of his blade.
Being an elf, Yuehai takes the long view. If a city had no challenges for him now, perhaps they may in the future. Plant a seed, and it will grow. So, wherever he went, he acquired disciples, each of whom he trained and sent back into the world to found their own schools or pursue their own desires. Dojos sprang up from those who had benefited from his tutelage along the path of his travels. Here, they spread his ideas about the philosophy of combat, to be used for whatever ends they please.
The core of the philosophy is straightforward. In war, as in all things in life, every step of your method must cut through to correct answer in the same movement. It is not enough to learn how to parry or swing, or master a difficult maneuver. In battle, your every act must cut the enemy in the same movement, whether you dodge, parry, strike, grapple, or be struck yourself. It is essential that every act serve the primary goal, as the only true measure of skill is effectiveness, and the only true measure of effectiveness is victory.
If you fail to achieve victory, it is futile to claim that your style was sound and that you acted with propriety (That's the way of the scrub, after all (http://www.sirlin.net/ptw-book/introducingthe-scrub)). There is no such thing as an unearned victory in war; the man who wins is always a cut above, and to make excuses is to remain forever weak. The battlefield knows not your petty scruples, only the man who is left standing. The true master must first master the void, emptying himself of all superficial desires save the one that is truest to him. Only then will he have the clarity of the void. Only then, with a mind unclouded, can he seize his greatest desire. Only then will a warrior have true sakki, the killing intent. And humor, of all things, can help you do that, because humor helps you to see your own superficial flaws and contrived seriousness for what they really are.
Yuehai is said to have left to travel the planes centuries ago, but legend has it that someday he will return to challenge the world's heroes. Some of the students of his teachings aspire to be ready to challenge him when he reappears, and many become wanderers seeking strength abroad themselves. But there are any number of reasons for one to desire to be strong...
Code of Conduct: Paladins of Olidammara
http://pre04.deviantart.net/4106/th/pre/f/2014/104/1/b/roguecgsociety_by_regochan-d7eif5d.jpg (http://klsteeleart.deviantart.com/art/Rogue-INWAP-Games-447637297)
"Everyone's gotta go sometime. Lives are like money. They exist to be spent. You just gotta make sure you spend yours on something nice."
- Auleric the Swift
This code of conduct applies to those who would call themselves paladins of the faith, not just any follower of Olidammara.
- Do not bow to anyone. Well, okay, if you want to tip your head as a greeting or as a bit of romantic flair, that's all fine and well and stylish. But no prostrating yourself before a guy like you're going to kiss his feet! Definitely no prostrating. Not even to the gods. Not even to your pal Olidammara. Especially not, even! Bow only to yourself. Die before accepting any master who would require you to kiss the dirt. Bowing like a magician to a round of applause is fine. You can bow to show off. Bowing in submission is not! Got it? Good!
- Be true to yourself. Put no master before yourself. Find out what you are really greedy for and pursue that desire.
- Have a sense of humor. Do not be somber and boring. Definitely don't be depressing, because then you'll be depressed and that's not in your interest at all. Liven things up! I don't really care how you do it. Keep a few tricks up your sleeve.
- When a dance partner offers you a hand, take the dance. When the house rises in song, let your voice join in.
- No vows of poverty or temperance or celibacy or any of that stuff. Why would you do that to yourself?
- Do not be a miser. Those guys really ruffle my feathers, they get greed all wrong. Keep as much for yourself as you can meaningfully spend on yourself, no more. If you get more than that, you can spend it on yourself by giving it to others who can make things around you better, and remember all that stuff around you is yours too whether the law says you own it or not. That money does you no good rotting in a warehouse somewhere, unspent. It has to be out there in the world doing something. I mean, maybe I could understand if you could swim in it like Scrooge McDuck, but I saw a guy try that once and it totally didn't work.
- Give away all your stuff when you die. Don't just keep it all in an estate. That's not even good for your kids. Have you seen those spoiled kids? You don't want that, do you? Heck, they probably don't even want that, even if they don't know it yet.
Worshippers are still wondering who Scrooge McDuck is.
Also, intended to be readable in any order, and for it to be easy to transplant individual parts into other settings.
Olidammara, The Laughing Rogue
http://orig01.deviantart.net/58cf/f/2014/135/0/3/follower_by_sheppard56-d7ihxmg.jpg (http://sheppard56.deviantart.com/art/Follower-454333048)
"I disagree. You want to bring back someone that you’ve lost. You might want money. Maybe you want women. Or, you might want to protect the world. These are all common things people want. Things that their hearts desire. Greed may not be good, but it’s not so bad, either. You humans think greed is just for money and power! But everyone wants something they don’t have."
- Greed, "Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood"
"The world doesn't belong to you! It belongs to ME!"
- Last words of Auleric the Swift, Paladin of Olidammara, before his legendary self-sacrifice.
Expanded Domains: Celerity, Chaos, City, Family, Greed, Halfling, Illusion, Knowledge, Kobold, Luck, Lust, Protection, Travel, Trickery
Portfolio: Adventure, Bards (different type than Corellon though), Beggars, Birthdays, Competitive Altruism (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showsinglepost.php?p=21245780&postcount=31), Daring, Desire, Gifts, Greed, Heyokas (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heyoka), Humor, Laughter, Materialism, Mischief, Music, Potlatches (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potlatch), Rogues, Romance, Street Performers, Thieves, Tricks, Vagabonds, Wine
Theme: http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=Fa31djbUeaw#Imagine_Dragons_On_Top_Of_World_Lyr ics, http://listenonrepeat.com/watch/?v=zSCOYAJd2PE#Cage_the_Elephant_-_Ain_t_No_Rest_for_the_Wicked_[Lyrics]
Knowledge (Religion) DC 10:
Olidammara is the god of desire, associated with celebration, adventure, greed, romance, mischief, and scoundrels. He is a hedonistic trickster deity who encourages his followers to live life to the fullest, and revel in the joys the world has to offer... even if it means you sometimes have to take what you want without permission. His open encouragement of greed and mischief makes his followers unpopular in some societies.
In art, Olidammara is depicted as a split-faced figure with a twisted smile. One side of his visage is dark and mirthful, the other bright and serious. His symbol is the twisted mirror, representing self-interest as well as the sacred role of humor.
It is said that Olidammara invented wine as a gift for Moradin... which kept the Soul Forger distracted from his mischief.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 15:
Olidammara has a bit of a bad reputation, sometimes reviled as the "god of greed." If you ask Olidammara's followers, those stodgy priests of other deities are all just brainwashed by the divine establishment. What kind of real good god just wants you to be an ascetic, prostrating yourself before them, giving everything of yourself but getting nothing back? Olidammara actually wants to give his followers things. Real things! You deserve things! The world is yours for the taking! Seize the day and keep it! Heck, steal it if you have to. Any man who takes the effort to steal something himself (instead of systematically) probably wants it more than you anyways. And those stealing systematically make thievery necessary, because hey, there isn't enough good stuff to go around when guys like that are involved. Olidammara especially likes when you steal valuables from the wealthy, because then "nobody gets hurts, except for those insurance crooks."
To Olidammara's faithful, greed is not a sin, for it is desire that makes anything precious and sacred in the first place. Behind greed is a love of the fine things in life. Indulge your greed! Protect the fine things in life! Greed is greater than just a love of trinkets. Your mind and body are yours, so take care of them! Your friends are yours, so take care of them! Your society is yours, so take care of it! Your world is yours, so take care of it! In possessing all things, you will do right by all things, for only a fool would harm their own possessions. Possess it all, cherish it all, and take responsibility for it all! Fight for that which is precious to you. True strength comes from having something to protect. To one faithful to Olidammara, joy does not come from within, but rather it comes from that which you surround yourself with, so make everything around you good.
Some temples do collections via gambling, with parishioners betting on what curve the storyteller is going to throw in next to modify the parable they're preaching. It keeps the stories morphing while it also requires that the faithful actually know the dogma and the material. It also funds the temple in a way that's difficult to account for, allowing certain acquisitions to be explained away.
In fact, temples of Olidammara often pride themselves on "nobody falling asleep" during their services, which are often laden with music, entertainment (including things like ledgerdemain "magic" shows), games, and raucous storytelling. Pranks, too, are sacred, because things need to be stirred up from time to time to give life its proper spice.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 20:
Olidammaran scripture is updated far more often than most, or at least rarely quoted directly. Clergy are encouraged to mingle amongst temple visitors and relay Olidammara's teachings in plain language. Essentially, the exact opposite of old school Christianity requiring sermons to be given in Latin; Olidammara wants you to spread his message in the contemporary local style.
A core idea in Olidammaran dogma is that Olidammara does not like to be sacrificed to... at least not in the sense most other gods do. Indeed, his only hard and fast law is that none should ever bow to him. One re-telling of a classic myth phrased it thus: "Keep your stuff! I'm not the kind of god who wants you to be ascetic and just worship and sacrifice to him for nothing in return. Screw that noise. I don't want your lame mortal stuff anyways. I'm up here in the heavens with my sweet God bling, man. You wanna do right by me, just gimme a fun adventure story to tell. Go be the trickster hero of an epic poem or something. Teach someone something without letting them know it was you. Or whatever's your style. Hey man if I already knew the story I wanted to hear I would have written it myself."
Olidammara's gospel warns against merely intuiting your desires. Perceptions, even of ourselves, get all wrapped up in social norms, and as a god of humor he's all about subverting—and seeing past—the mess of habit and ingrained thought. An Olidammaran must look into the twisted mirror and find what they, personally, are truly greedy for.
For instance, while Olidammarans often emphasize that greed can be virtuous, being a miser is not, for a miser acts out of fear rather than desire. Following your desires, they say, doesn't mean -hoarding- everything. That's not how real greed works. The problem with misers is that they aren't greedy enough to spend all that money they've got! Gotta circulate that stuff to get anything that isn't a bunch of yellow pictures of old guys. Who wants a bunch of bad yellow pictures of old guys? That stuff only has value in circulation. They don't understand real greed. They are like a dragon, afraid of losing their pile of useless lucre that they sleep on to feel safe. That's not greed. That's insecurity. That's fear. Be brave! Get things! Deck ALL of the halls! Give the BEST present so that you look better than your friends!
In fact, Olidammara encourages holidays and celebrations that involve competitive altruism (such as potlatches) or focusing on a single person's desires (such as birthdays, a day all about you!). He also encourages followers to give away everything they own upon their deaths so that they'll treat your memory right (otherwise, what would your money be doing for you? Nothing! Gotta think of the self-interest!).
Despite what might on the surface appear to be fairly similar ideals, Olidammara often quarrels with Bahamut. He understands but disagrees with Tiamat, and tries to help her work through her paranoia issues. Heironeous sometimes tries to chew him out or set him straight, but Olidammara just laughs and likes to mess with him.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 25:
Olidammara is actually way older than some might expect, for he was born the first time a god felt desire, making him literally as old as want. One of the oldest known shrines to any god of the modern pantheon, known as the Burned Circle, honors Olidammara as an enlightened figure. Also noteworthy is the fact that Olidammara seems to show up in almost every culture of almost every intelligent race in the world, though worship of him is rarely dominant anywhere. In mythology, the other gods are occasionally surprised by his depth of experience, control, and wisdom, which seems like such a contrast with his youthful exuberance and mischief. Scholars can't seem to agree on what the first desire was (and Olidammara doesn't ever talk about his age, it is only ever implied), so there is some theological speculation of how old he really is... some even placing his birth back at the moment that Nerull first sought to create disparity. Despite his age, he's still only an intermediate deity, since he has never expanded his portfolio. He jokes that the one he started with keeps him too busy already.
Olidammaran faith has its roots in heyoka (ritual clown) traditions. To simply call a heyoka a fool does not do justice to their role. Heyokas carry the medicine of chaos. The heyoka is a sacred thief, robbing people of their over-seriousness, their anxieties, their preconceptions. The sacred role of the heyoka is to be a mirror, his backwards behavior exemplifying the very opposite of normal in order to give us a clearer understanding of how to act ourselves. In their antics we see our own imperfections revealed so that we might reflect, get unstuck, and evolve spiritually. Through showy displays of satire and blasphemy, heyokas create a cultural dissonance from which anxiety is free to collapse on itself into laughter.
Olidammara's black-and-white face represents the black and white paint of a heyoka. His split visage represents a twisted reflection in a sacred mirror.
Knowledge (Religion) DC 30:
The oral traditions of the Lokarrh proclaim that Gruumsh's first inspiration for a world without need for Corellon or Moradin came from one of Olidammara's heyoka performances. They also say that during Gruumsh's ill-fated rebellion, Olidammara sided with Corellon and Moradin, but his antics always screwed things up for his side, causing Corellon to lay suspicion on him and bring him before a council of judgment. A tipsy Moradin exonerated him, saying that you can't blame a ritual clown for being an oaf.
Nevertheless, some suspect that Olidammara is far more capable than he lets on, for he is a wise and ancient trickster. After all, some say that humor is a path to learning, and so Olidammara is at his core one of the gods of Knowledge.
Organization: The Motley Temple
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/50/68/a9/5068a93972385513893955f71a3a00e3.jpg (https://www.artstation.com/artist/joannawolska)
"Well, if you want to stay, you'll have to offer a donation to spruce the place up. Alms for yourself, really."
- Adlyn Altner, priestess of the Motley Temple.
The Motley Temple is named because it is decorated entirely with relics plundered from a variety of religions, kingdoms, and eras, supposedly all from legal dungeon delving. It is a proud patron of adventurers, but is often suspected of also being a base for a thieves guild. The knights of Heironeous shake the place down from time to time, but always come up with nothing while the head priest gives them her best winning smile and a rude gesture.
Many shake their heads and talk about it as a "hive of scum and villainy" populated by unscrupulous vagabonds and adventurers. The adventurers themselves, however, can find all of their needs met here, and an effective base of operations... so long as they make the appropriate donations to the temple's decor. The Motley Temple is frequented by middlemen who can connect you with just the magic item you want or find a place to offload a dragon's hoard, healers who can fix up that pesky petrification problem, oracles who can put you on track to your destination, a board full of job notices, or whatever an adventurer might need.
The religious services of the Motley Temple are highlighted by raucous storytelling, gambling, song and drink. Parishioners often bet on what curve the storyteller is going to throw in next to modify the parable they're preaching. It keeps the stories morphing while it also requires that the faithful actually know the dogma and the material if they want to get in on the game. It also funds the temple in a way that's difficult to account for, allowing many of the temple's acquisitions to be conveniently explained away. As a base of operations for adventurers, the temple's entertaining services also often include shows of martial, magical, or roguish skills, or stories of dungeon delves.
Organization: The Disciples of Yuehai
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"You, who sang down the walls of the Spired City and slew the Bright Emperor. Are you worthy of my desire?"
- Yuehai the Wanderer
When asked, "who is the strongest fighter in the world?" many would reply "Yuehai, the Wanderer." A legendary crusader of Olidammara, Yuehai is greedy for only one thing: The challenge of a worthy opponent, met in single combat. The legendary wanderer traveled the world, mastering the world's fighting styles and besting the champions of each region he visited. He traveled to lands so distant that none had heard of his homeland, all in search of opponents worthy of his blade.
Being an elf, Yuehai takes the long view. If a city had no challenges for him now, perhaps they may in the future. Plant a seed, and it will grow. So, wherever he went, he acquired disciples, each of whom he trained and sent back into the world to found their own schools or pursue their own desires. Dojos sprang up from those who had benefited from his tutelage along the path of his travels. Here, they spread his ideas about the philosophy of combat, to be used for whatever ends they please.
The core of the philosophy is straightforward. In war, as in all things in life, every step of your method must cut through to correct answer in the same movement. It is not enough to learn how to parry or swing, or master a difficult maneuver. In battle, your every act must cut the enemy in the same movement, whether you dodge, parry, strike, grapple, or be struck yourself. It is essential that every act serve the primary goal, as the only true measure of skill is effectiveness, and the only true measure of effectiveness is victory.
If you fail to achieve victory, it is futile to claim that your style was sound and that you acted with propriety (That's the way of the scrub, after all (http://www.sirlin.net/ptw-book/introducingthe-scrub)). There is no such thing as an unearned victory in war; the man who wins is always a cut above, and to make excuses is to remain forever weak. The battlefield knows not your petty scruples, only the man who is left standing. The true master must first master the void, emptying himself of all superficial desires save the one that is truest to him. Only then will he have the clarity of the void. Only then, with a mind unclouded, can he seize his greatest desire. Only then will a warrior have true sakki, the killing intent. And humor, of all things, can help you do that, because humor helps you to see your own superficial flaws and contrived seriousness for what they really are.
Yuehai is said to have left to travel the planes centuries ago, but legend has it that someday he will return to challenge the world's heroes. Some of the students of his teachings aspire to be ready to challenge him when he reappears, and many become wanderers seeking strength abroad themselves. But there are any number of reasons for one to desire to be strong...
Code of Conduct: Paladins of Olidammara
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"Everyone's gotta go sometime. Lives are like money. They exist to be spent. You just gotta make sure you spend yours on something nice."
- Auleric the Swift
This code of conduct applies to those who would call themselves paladins of the faith, not just any follower of Olidammara.
- Do not bow to anyone. Well, okay, if you want to tip your head as a greeting or as a bit of romantic flair, that's all fine and well and stylish. But no prostrating yourself before a guy like you're going to kiss his feet! Definitely no prostrating. Not even to the gods. Not even to your pal Olidammara. Especially not, even! Bow only to yourself. Die before accepting any master who would require you to kiss the dirt. Bowing like a magician to a round of applause is fine. You can bow to show off. Bowing in submission is not! Got it? Good!
- Be true to yourself. Put no master before yourself. Find out what you are really greedy for and pursue that desire.
- Have a sense of humor. Do not be somber and boring. Definitely don't be depressing, because then you'll be depressed and that's not in your interest at all. Liven things up! I don't really care how you do it. Keep a few tricks up your sleeve.
- When a dance partner offers you a hand, take the dance. When the house rises in song, let your voice join in.
- No vows of poverty or temperance or celibacy or any of that stuff. Why would you do that to yourself?
- Do not be a miser. Those guys really ruffle my feathers, they get greed all wrong. Keep as much for yourself as you can meaningfully spend on yourself, no more. If you get more than that, you can spend it on yourself by giving it to others who can make things around you better, and remember all that stuff around you is yours too whether the law says you own it or not. That money does you no good rotting in a warehouse somewhere, unspent. It has to be out there in the world doing something. I mean, maybe I could understand if you could swim in it like Scrooge McDuck, but I saw a guy try that once and it totally didn't work.
- Give away all your stuff when you die. Don't just keep it all in an estate. That's not even good for your kids. Have you seen those spoiled kids? You don't want that, do you? Heck, they probably don't even want that, even if they don't know it yet.
Worshippers are still wondering who Scrooge McDuck is.