Art Objects.... Pimp your BBEG's crib!

[Bullet06320]

as originally post on WOTC boards by wereooze on Nov 03, 2004
http://community.wizards.com/forum/whats-dm-do/threads/947276

DM: A search of the necromancer's tower uncovers 4500 gold pieces, a Shield +2, and a 1700Gp gem encrusted ring.
Player: Another gem encrusted ring? Who buys all this crap?

Who buys gem encrusted crap indeed! An oft-ignored (until now) treasure table in D&D has been 'Art Object'. This is well and good, except the DMG fails to embellish much, and many DM's are left handing-out three pieces of "art": Gem encrusted rings, Golden statues, and Elvish tapestries.
If you run a 'Hack n' Slash' game, I suppose that would be just fine. Kill, Loot, and do it again next week. But for those of us who run more elaborate campaigns, we have all new ways of (psychologically) torturing PCs . We have horse thieves, taxes, entire legions of undead to threaten helpful NPC villages... But always have Hero's enjoyed the valuable 'Gold piece'. But now I suggest you put even more of the BBEG's total treasure value into 'Art Objects'.

After all... Do you own stuff, or do you own nothing and have all your money in a shoebox?

Yes, most of us BUY stuff. Playstations, couches, Mail-Order-Brides, compact disks, towels, cars, motorbikes, deer rifles. And since we buy stuff, we must assume most BBEG's like to spend money too (except possible dragons who sleep on mounts of gold and still cut coupons). Since BBEG's tend to be wealthy, intelligent types; they will spend money on 'Art Objects'..... Because plasma TV's haven't been invented yet.

BUT!, say the DM's, we dont know what Art Objects are! Thats OK. Just think of any object, and chances are there are super-expensive items that do the exact same thing, but people buy anyway: $2000 pens, $1,000,000 stereos, BMW's, etc etc

Why more ART? Because A: Its harder to haul out of the dungeon
B: PC's now have to find an Art-Dealer to sell it to
C: Its funny to see what PC's "collect" themselves.

Fumbuck the 1/2-Orc barbarian: "This is my mahogany davenport with solid brass accents and a polished marble top. It was hand-carved by halfings in the village of HappyFunLand and I found it in the possession of an Ogre-Mage who's skull I smashed with a hammer. Would you like to see my collection of ceramic rustmonster miniatures or maybe my Electrum dwarvish-whiskey shotglass set?"
Other Character:

Introducing Wereooze's Fine Art aka. The Dunegon Decorators Collection.. to stock a BBEG lair with, or add spice to your campaign world! (based on Table 7-6:Art Objects of DMG 3.0 ). Inspired by a copy of The Home Decorators Collection that showed-up with todays junk mail.

10gp
*ceramic figurine/statuette. about 6" long and hand-painted. Can be of anything: rustmonsters w/ pink bows, beholders, orc-Hobos. Be sure that any statue type (such as Orc hobo or rustmonster) as an entire series of statues by a famous ceramic statue designer that the PC can collect. (collecting rare statuettes can make for interesting side-quests and annoy fellow PC's)

*Scrimshaw. Ivory with design etched onto it. Usually boats & nautical themes as it is a popular hobby with whalers. Put scrimshaw on regular items to make them worth more treasure room... like pocket knife handles.

*Electrum whiskey glasses (emblazoned with the name of a famous tavern)

*Gold body jewelry

*Intricate Bronze locket, possibly with lock of maiden's hair inside.

*Copper ring. Possibly with magnets imbedded.

*Ceramic figurine/statuette. About 6" long and hand-painted. Be sure that any statue type as an entire series of statues by a famous ceramic statue designer that the PC can collect. (Collecting rare statuettes can make for interesting side-quests and annoy fellow PC's)

*Scrimshaw. Ivory with design etched onto it. Usually boats & nautical themes as it is a popular hobby with whalers. Put scrimshaw on regular items to make them worth more

*Electrum whiskey glasses (emblazoned with the name of a famous tavern)

*Gold body jewelry.

*Intricate Bronze locket, possibly with lock of maiden's hair inside.

*Copper ring. Possibly with magnets imbedded.

*Scroll tube: carved from ivory, with engraved gold end caps.

*Bracelet: made from interwoven bands of silver, copper, and bronze.

*Willow Bark elixer (look up the origins of asprin)

47gp

*A solid Electrum ravioli crimper

50 gp

*"My PC went to the Nine Hells and all I got was this stupid t-shirt!"

*10 pounds of Bavarian hops (can you say good beer?)

55gp

*hand-crafted chairs (pair), in Teak, Walnut, or Mahogany. Certain to be comfortable and add some flair to any dungeon chamber. Geometric patterns, leaves, or skulls carved into the chair-arms along with an upholstered seating area (embroidered to taste) are common at this range. Remember that any BBEG worth his salt is going to have at least 8 chairs around any masterwork dinner table (105gp).

*Copper framed wall mirror. The hand-wrought frame surrounds a mirror of silvered glass. dragons & leaves are common styles. They make really good treasure 'cause they break easy!

*Painting. It might be still-life, surreal, or maybe Orcish impressionism of the third age. But 55gp paintings are usually ho-hum and 24"x36".

*Masterwork cooking pots. Ceramic enamled cast-iron baking goods available in most colours. Add a +1 to any Cooking skill DC.

*Leatherbound, gold leafed book. A tome on any skill or knowledge, determined randomly. A character may use it to refrence at time of spending skill points... or just sell it.

*Crystal decanter and wine-glass set.

*Silver ring. May be inscribed with the name of your beloved.
(How many PCs may feel regret about killing the BBEG when they realize he was killing people in the village that lynched and murdered his lover? Maybe even spark a quest to make amends.)

*Polished mahogany walking stick.

*Silver flatware; eating utensils made of silver. Service for 8.

*Crystal decanter and wineglass set.

*Fine crushed velvet hat with an eagle's feather.

*Stylus: a silver stylus, engraved and inlaid with gold.

*Statuette: 8in tall bronze statue of an armored warrior leaning on his spear. There are silver and gold inlays on his armor, and shield. Weighs 7lbs.

*Bear Teeth Necklace

60gp

*Gold-tinted mad-scientist goggles

75gp

*Brooch: 4 inches in diameter, made from polished brass worked into the shape of a sleeping Unicorn. A chalcedony is inset to depict the horn.

105gp

*Dinner Table. for 8 its so shiny it looks wet and the legs have decorative 'claws' on the ends. Or maybe dolphins..whatever floats yer boat. (Be sure to include chairs...mentioned above).

*Booze cabinet. Probably manufactured by the same halflings as the table & chairs, this tall armoire-like piece of old-growth kindling has shelves for a whole array of fine glasses & goblets, decanters & measuring shakers. Also a second storage bin at knee-level holds bottles of wine/spirits

*ornate silver goblets, set of 8. Shaped like squids , human skulls, or just bizarre arcane symbols... silver wine glasses say a lot about your kind of person.

*painting. still 24"x36" but this class of painting is of intresting subject matter: nude elves, decapitations.... something to make up for the price.

*Pair of boots designed by snooty high-end boot maker. Bards (and women) love footwear with nose-bleed prices.

*life sized marble bust of famous person. I'd personally have Vecna myself

*Fine crushed velvet hat with a Griffon feather

*Gold flatware, service for 8

*Masterwork dagger w/ ivory handle.

*Silver tea set.

*Golden ring. Possibly inscribed with name of beloved.

*Tabard: Cloth of silver with the symbol of Nom-Galan embroidered on the front, and set with gemstone chips.

*Golden Pen case held shut with an ornate clasp. Carved into the case is a scene of a scribe writing in a tome, sitting on a stool amid stacks of parchment. The symbol of Akilloes is engraved on the opposite side.

*Thieves tools of the finest craftsmanship (+1 Circumstance bonus for disable devise) and design.

*Belt Buckle: an electrum buckle set with a large, 2"x3", cabochon of Lapis Lazuli engraved and filigreed with copper.

*3" silver brooch, with a griffin rampant on a blue enamel field. The griffin’s eyes are amethysts

*Leaf shaped enameled gold locket, the stem forms the loop for a chain. Opens to reveal a very small compartment with 2 surfaces suitable for miniatures. The compartment could hold a small ring or a dose or drugs, poison, or antidote.

*Statuette: 10” tall alabaster statue of comely lass bearing a water jug in her arms. She is wearing a toga over one shoulder and the breast not covered by the jug is exposed.

200gp

*a pair of the BBEGS baby boots plated in gold

*Carved Baltic amber necklace with bone clasp

240gp

*masterwork hat, boots, cape, and jerkin made of fine leather

249 gp

*Gilded Rocfeather pen w/ magical glowy glyphs

350gp

*King-sized bed to match your table & chairs

*masterwork oversized harp that nobody knows how to play

*20' long tapestry of some battle

*3' tall ceramic vase. Painted by elves of some remote island. Heavy & easy to break. holds flowers

*Intricate waste-paper basket. Made from an Owlbear leg!

*Walking stick. Gold handle

*2' long oriental dragon statue made of gold.

*Winterwlf fur coat

*masterwork dagger with ivory handle & minor jewel pommel

*Fine crushed velvet hat with enchanted Roc feather.

*Bas Relief exquisitely carved on piece of dragon eggshell. Quite likely of the scene of the dragon's hatching, or possibly of it's mother being slain, depending on what kind of dragon it was.

*Dicebag. Contains finely-made dice of various forms of marble and obsidian, with numbers very carefully carved. Set from D4 to D20, includes D100.

*Ring: a lion’s head, finely crafted, of electrum with eyes of topaz.

*Bracelet: made from interlocking leaves carved from silver and enameled in green, and set with
small carved coral berries.

450 gp

*Gold-tipped ebony cane

500gp

*Griffons's Head, mounted and stuffed, on a lovely chestnut base with a gold plaque

*Juvenile Green Dragon Head, mounted and stuffed, crest preserved

*Head of a humanoid, mounted and stuffed, on a chestnut base with gold plaque

*Oversized golden cup, used by cloud giants, inlaid with various pastoral scenes

*Crystal phial of hydra or troll blood, with a golden stopper

*Beard clasp set, made of burnished gold and inlaid with gems

*Naga hide boots

*Lamp with a living will-o-wisp providing light

*Basilisk's Eye, in a crystal phial with golden stopper

*Rug made of grizzly fur, head preserved

*A two-century old bottle of elven wine, crafted from grapes which no longer grow in the region and crafted by brewers that no longer exist.

*Gloves made from Quasit skin.

*Displacer beast leisure suit

550gp

*Floor of residence professionally tiled with marble & soapstone tiles by dwarven mastercraftsman. Lets see the PCs try to hock that in town....

*Arched interior door crafted of old-growth teak, set with blackend steel hinges, and a brass lock.

*Ornate ironwork torch scones. set of 50. may be shaped to resemble skulls, music notes, etc

*leaded-glass fireplace screen. With stained-gass picture effect. covers any 5' wide fireplace.

*5' marble statue

*bejewelled circlet

*platinum framed spectacles with smoked glass lenses. to look cool and protect from harsh solar rays.

*masterwork dagger with dragonbone & platinum handle

*Crushed velvet hat with a Celestial/Eryines feather in it. Because nothing says pimp-daddy extreme than having an Erinyes' feather.

*Crushed velvet three-piece suit in garish colors. Bling-Bling, baby.

*Juvenile Green Dragon Head, mounted and stuffed, crest preserved.

*Head of a humanoid, mounted and stuffed, on a chestnut base with gold plaque.

*Oversized golden cup, used by cloud giants, inlaid with various pastoral scenes.

*Crystal phial of hydra or troll blood, with a golden stopper.

*Beard clasp set, made of burnished gold and inlaid with gems.

*Naga hide boots.

*Lamp with a living will-o-wisp providing light.

*Basilisk's Eye, in a crystal phial with golden stopper.

*Rug made of grizzly fur, head preserved.

*Twisted platinum tiara, capped with dragon's claws that clasp large bloodstones.

*Adamantine silverware set.

*Lamp: a 4-wick oil lamp of gold, with platinum reflectors. The sides are carved in bas-relief, depicting the city of brass. Weighs 4 lbs and holds 6 pints of oil for a 10-hour burn time.
*Lock crafted from solid brass and beautifully engraved, the shank mechanism are made from high quality steel and the mechanism is of exceptional quality (DC+2 to open).

*Statue fountain: 6ft tall naked woman pouring water over her head from a pitcher. She is facing the spout of water with her eyes closed and mouth slightly parted. Her free hand cups one breast. If connected to a water source, the water will cascade down her voluptuous form.

1000gp

*masterwork dagger with scrimshawed dragonbone handle, platinum fittings, and jeweled pommel.

*masterwork glazed bone-chian plates w/ silver serving platters

*wastepaper basket, made from dragon leg!

*undead brain-in-a-jar. Sci-Fi style decor for your alchemy lab.

*Diamond-encrusted gold medallion, quite likely spelling out your name.

*Really Freaking Huge Diamond.

*Black, crushed-velvet Dicebag lined with woven hair from an elf maiden. Dice contained are of extremely high quality, carved to perfection with intricate attention to detail, the numbers, instead of being painted, are chiseled out of the surface by faeries, and filled in with a mixture of platinum and faerie dust which solidifies.

*Dire Bear, mounted and stuffed, placed on a fine wooden pedistal in a fierce pose

*Small basket woven from treated howler spines

*Coat made of dire weasel fur

*Table carved from a dead dryad, face preserved

*Rare antique chess set: This chess set is made out of a mithril and adamantine board, and the normal pieces are replaced by... bakers, serfs, butchers, weavers, tanners, and so on, or just different races. Halfing-pawn, elf-bishop, dragon-queen, wizard-king, knight-, umm, knight, for example.

*A neck mantle made of mythril and banded together with deer leather.

*Couatl-feather boa

*Beaten red gold ring twisted to resemble a snake coiled about the finger. It has two tiny rubies for eyes.

*2-foot rod of bronze inlaid with a circular pattern. The tip is formed in the shape of a flower with gems set in among the petals; 16 violet garnets and a huge, deep blue amethyst. The other end is a 2 inch gold knob. Weighs 3lbs.

*Comb: the golden body is carved in the form of a dragons head with a single ruby for an eye.

*Small basket woven from treated howler spines.

*Diamond-encrusted gold medallion.

*Awakened Dire Beaver Pelt Lined Cloak

1125 gp

*Masterworked Mithril Chainshirt that has "Llolth is a lesbian" on the back

1150 gp

*cameo carving of last empress of the fallen empire in ivory

1,250 gp

*Whitewashed Black Dragonhide Lab Coat

1500 gp

*Dragonbone end table, each piece carved to fit in joints, otherwise kept intact

*Medalian, chain crafted from adamant, with the actual medalian being a gear from an Inevedable

*A shattered lich's phylactery

*Coat made from mustuvial fur (Mm... warm *and* evil)

*Beholder's large eye, in crystal phial, with golden stopper

*Support beams for a room made of dragon rib bones

*Idol of a god of madness: An obsidian pillar (about 1' tall) studded with dozens of gems and jewels.

*Coat made from Sphinx fur.

*Medallion, chain crafted from Mithril.

*relief carving in alabaster and detailed in jade. carving done with black dragon acid spit

3500gp

*Bracelet made from 46 tiny white pearls strung on a gilded wire, fastened with a barbed hook and loop.

*Set of buttons, in platinum, each depicts an eagle with wings spread and clasping a bundle of arrows in one talon and a lightning bolt in the other. The arrows and lightning bolts are crafted from precious gems.

*Hair net woven of platinum and electrum wire, set with 32 pearls, 32 water opals and 32 aquamarines.

*Medallion of electrum, set with a topaz of great size and clarity and 12 amber stones ringing the center.

*A suit of fine chainmail crafted of platinum (AC+3) set with sapphires and aquamarines in a crown shaped pattern on the chest.

*Carved crystal chalice, inlaid with silver and set with emeralds.

*Headband made of platinum, set with 3 rubies.

5000gp

*Basin: crafted of platinum and silver, and highly decorated with engraving and carvings of worship scenes. Holds 3 gallons of liquid safely and weighs 10lbs.

*Cup of the thinnest beaten gold set with a lip ring of tiny emeralds and incised with an abstract circular pattern

7,000gp

*Designer-made perfume, made from kraken oil and scented from a rare flower that blooms once every century.

8,000 gp

"The proper Human" Owned by the late elven Duke Elusis Celestri (now a mummy lord).

This statue has a stone slab at the base, engraved with the title (in Elvish) and is carved out of fine white marble. It is a life-size depiction of a human, stripped down to the waist and kneeling whilst wearing a cangue around his neck and shackles on his ankles. He is being whipped by an elf in full-body concealing armor, gilt with gold and sliver. While the handle is made of marble, the actual lashes of the whip have the same make as the real flogging tool. Veins of ruby and onyx magically planted in the back of the human slave are used to simulate the bleeding and welts suffered from the flogging being delivered by the slavedriver.


12,000 gp

*A quartz globe of the planet, 20' in diameter, suspended with a floating disc.

18,000 gp
*A series of mosaic walls, intricately tiled, to depict the initiation ceremony of bbeg's otherwise dead cult (i.e. Villa of Mysteries, Pompeii), unmovable or loses 95% value

2,000 GP

*Crystalized monster eye collection

80,000 gp
*The Gem Encrusted Harp.
Made from the finest woods in the world, carved by the master carpenter, with an elegant design, and with fine figures carved into it. A nymph, clothed in a what appears to be a thin dress blowing in the wind, supports the largest side, and has hundreds of gems upon it, each a shifting tinge of blue and gray. Her skin is smooth, with no imperfection, and it's color is provided by the wood. Her emerald eyes were made by only the best, and her hair's color was made from hundred of rubies and other imcomprehendably perfect gems. The designs' very existance has been made of the utter perfection of what it is. Hundreds of gems cover it, and the have been cut and placed so that one cannot tell that they are not merely a sheet of perfection.

Further speakings on Art Objects.

The overwhelmingly positive feedback to my thread has reinforced the idea that 'Art Objects', as covered in the DMG, have been short-sheeted. In future, I will attempt to write a comprehensive essay on Art, covering all these listed, and any other facets that I might think of. But for now, here is some further 'spanin, and a few examples.

Why Art?

The purpose of Art Objects in the D&D, as should apply to a campaign, serve basically one of three goals

* Flaunt wealth/Status symbol
* Promote morale
* Serve as a setting for an encounter

Of the three, the primary reason encountered in-game would apply to the personal wealth of an NPC.

But just remember that where art exists, there must be an artist. Famous guilds or individuals provide for campaign background, history and flavor.

Art and NPCs

NPC's, and in particular villains/BBEGs & nobility, are set above the common man by means of great wealth. A DM could always state that an NPCs total value is entirely in coin, but that is unrealistic, and does not promote any further possible roll-playing opportunities.

Art objects allow the wealthy NPC to stand-above the common NPC, whether they be peasants or soldiers, and be easily identified. If a pair of identical twins encountered you, and one wore a Rolex watch while the other had a Timex, you could be fairly certain in guessing which twin had more money.

Art objects can also function as a character trait. These things make NPCs easier to remember. If you describe Johansen the pirate as having an eyepatch studded with rubies, or Rupert the sage walks with an ivory cane, you can be sure that traits will help people remmeber that particular character (Even if there is no game-mechanic benefit for ruby studded eyepatches)

Art and the encounter

DM: You have defeated the necromancer, his hoarde includes 2500Gp, 4000Cp, and a wand of magic missles.
Player: Alright, we will split the coins evenly among our group and give the wand to our Sorcerer character.

As you can see, nothing much happens. But if, instead of coins, the necromancer's hoarde included gilded tomes, elvish taperstries, antique furnishings, a tube-set monoblock power amplifier et cetera; Then the group is left with an array of options:

*Do they make several trips to carefully unload the dungeon of all its possessions and hope to sell it in the nearest town?
*Do they decide to leave the heavy object, although worth a sizable chunk of the total haul, just because its simpler?
*Do they sort the individual items to try and sell them to famous collectors in far-away cities for an even greater profit?

And this assumes that the PC's have even found the Art in the BBEGs lair. In all fairness a DM could easily rule that unless the characters specifically search for art objects, or even make an appraisal check, that the Art Objects might go undiscovered and that fraction of the Loot wouldn't even go to the PCs! (and might be used/sold by the lairs next occupants!).

Alternately in the spirit of the vehicles on Mtv's Pimp my Ride, you could always have BBEG's spend their horde pimping-out something that, in the end, is still a worthless piece of crap.

*The battered-old nag w/ 15,000gp worth of enchanted tattoos that move around. The horse dies six days after the PC's find it.

*Naga-skin boots that manage to fit no-one but the BBEG properly (Non-magical clothing doesn't resize per wearer).

*1000gp bottle of Elvish wine that got left next to the fireplace for a few years

*Hand polished floors of trent-wood for BBEG's dung-hut

*Horse drawn carriage has solid silver wheels! Unfortunatley, in order to look "cool" the BBEG made the rear wheels too large and the front wheels too small. The price of this primeval "funny car" is a carriage with a DC penalty of -15 to operate correctly.

A complied list by theapokalypseshovel which includes many of Sanctaphrax posts found below
https://docs.google.com/document/pub?id=1IkUeDCAKNTZG6QhMNt-dqKtd7Qj9m67XZkQI_EYgtr0




For the cultured BBEG, why settle for images of nude elves when you can have a nude elf statue, carved from your choice of fine marbles. Can be in a variety of poses and demeanors, ranging from the stately to the beautiful to the lewd. 6000 GP, includes stand and a gold and mahogony plaque with your choice of words. Garunteed to be 100% lifelike to the finest detail.

For the villian with the bent for music, how about your very own pipe organ? And not just any humdrum, find-me-in-any-church pipe organ. This pipe organ is as big as most churches themselves, powered by magical air to fuel the pipes, this baby is LOUD, best used in caverns where you can get the best acoustics (as a bonus, playing this is certain to rid your less-refined subterrainian areas of pesky stalactites,) or in the grandest hall your grandest castle has. As a bonus, it's constructed and has three Musical Unseen Servants which will play your favorite tunes non-stop, and has valves to control volume, should you want something mellow. The pipes come in your choice of gold, platinum, or even obsidian (Enchanted to never break,) which will definately effect acoustics. The base and bench are typically carved from mahogany, Ironwood or Darkwood, or else made out of marble, slate or obsidian. Darker colors work better, but the customer is of course always right. The keys typically are made of ivory (depending on the status of elephant herds the world over, this may be unavaiable,) or various bone (One of these can take an entire Great Wyrm to make, which will increase the price but definately make a statement.)
45,000 GP.

For the BBEG with wealth so overflowing he dosen't know what to do with it all, art objects don't have to be portable. Your entire HOME can be an art object! Dragons roaring and breathing flame are no longer relegated to tapestry - you can have nude nymphs frolicing with dryads in the woods carved onto the very walls of your abode! The floor tiles can be carved with holy symbols or made of blackstone and have your initials inlaid in silver into each and every tile, you can relax in your bed carved from Darkwood, with a matress so thick and luxuriant that it takes ten strong men, eight stronger undead, or a whole iron golem to lift it, relax on a pillow stuffed with the down of Eryines or Celestial, and pull the canopy off the bed to admire the orgy scene on the vaulted roof of your chamber.
When you wake, why not take a stroll on the grand balcony, each colum of the guardrail a nude female of the fairer races - elves, humans, half-elves, drow, nymph, dryad, etcetera, and not a single creature duplicated once, all of them standing up beautifully, holding aloft a rail two feet wide with it's own sub-rail, perfect for perching your spellbook or glass of wine to watch the sun or moonrise. Then take a stroll through your library, lit at day by sunlight streaming through a vaulted ceiling made of solid amber, with bookshelves that are themselves carved with the holy symbols of gods of magic and books, furnished from solid Darkwood.
I'm sure you get the picture. Not all wealth need be portable. Hell, the PCs are as likely to claim the place for their own as they are to sack the place and put it to the torch. Be creative. This kind of castle deserves a thread all to it's own.

And the #1 item for the morally bankrupt... Why settle for a statue of a nude elf in your bedroom when you have a real, live nude elf, petrified and unpetrified on your command. She wears a tiara, when you utter a command word, she will be petrified, unpetrified, or disciplined. Any attempts by her to remove the tiara will be futile. Use her only as a statue, or to entertain any debauched desires you may have.
125,000 GP.

A hideously balanced, ceremonial 'greatsword' entirely in the shape of an incredibly long, nude female celestial. (If the blade that her legs are part of is sharpened, could be used as a Jovar* with the correct EWP for that weapon.) *Planar Handbook

A hideously balanced bastard sword in the shape of a nude female celestial with her arms held out.
A matching, hideously balanced bastard sword in the shape of a nude female succubus with her arms out.
The kicker? The swords mate together and lock nicely together. They were made to hug each other.

A seal-pendant for a kingdom/order/nation/empire that is ages disfunct or gone. Made of precious metals and rare gemstones.

A hammer in the shape of a smith's hammer, but made of silver.

A tiny golden-lace choker with a single long pendant meant to hang down between a humanoid woman's breasts.

A wavey-bladed dagger, forged of a green metal, with a large emerald set into the pommel.

A statue of a long-haired, exquisitely beautiful Drow elf, caught dancing. It seems so lifelike...

The script to an unreleased play/song from a famous bard/playwright.

Around 2,000 - 5,000 gold, depending on fame of the bard/playwright and how fanatical a collector you are. (Get a couple of the fat slugs in a bidding war, drive the price real high.)

A chess set with each piece individually detailed by a master jewler (Masterworked). The pieces represent some special struggle of historical significance - the Blood War, the war between Good and Evil, a more terristrial war of significance in your game world. The pieces are made from platinum and black gold, and the chessboard is assembled from perfect squares of marble and onyx.
Around 5,000 gold pieces, from the price of the material alone. 10,000 - 15,000 altogether.

A length of golden rope. Around 2,000 GP. (More if it was used to hang someone famous.)

The Masterworked sword used to behead someone important, possibly made just for the occasion. 3,000 - 20,000, depending on whom was beheaded.

A locket containing a lock of a queen or princess' hair. 1,000-5,000 depending on whom she is and how big a fan the person is. 10,000 to the sky if the person is a wizard (evil or otherwise) who wants to use it as a material link for ritual magic.

A marble statue of an armored warrior on horseback, depicted in the middle of a charge. Life-sized, with pedastal. 10,000 GP, if you can move it.

50 ft. long by 13 ft. tall armiore/dresser/wardrobe combination. Carved from mahogany by master carpenters, inlaid with precious gems as knobs and handles wrought of mithril silver. Sits on forty feet, each of them a dragon's claw holding a huge pearl. These double as casters.

Matching four-post canopy bed carved of mahogany with insets of black gold, headboard carved with the image of the BBEG, footboard carved with the image of a castle high on a cliff. The sheets, pillows and curtains are crimson-colored, and the bottom of the canopy has a glittering relief of the night sky done in gemstones, while the sheets have a huge crest embroidered in gold.

Again, continuing on a mahogany theme, a figurehead from a sailing vessel mounted on the wall. A nude, winged maiden bound in chains, her hands covering her face, apparently weeping. Carved of dark mahogany.

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My DM rolled random treasure for a Formian hive that my wizard cleaned out with an industrial quantity of lamp oil (1500 lbs of it), a decanter of endless water, permanant Flight, and a torch.

He was like "27 Art Objects". He rolled like 7d6, and got four fives in a row.

Here was the total list:

A small statue of a roaring copper dragon - toy cat size

a giant crown on the dead queens head - Formian Queen's Crown

a collection of music instruments from a simple flute to jeweled harps
an embroydered silk and silver mandle,
a crystal glass set, and collection of fine aged wine
a pearl neckalce,
a gold ruby-studded ring and necklace set,
A masterwork dagger with scrimshawed dragonbone handle, platinum fittings, and jeweled pommel
Really Freaking Huge Diamond.
a lifelike statue of a nude Nymph, (my favorite, :inlove: )
a pipe organ with fine silver fittings,
a collection of minor gems,
a mother-of-pearl coated 20ft statue of pelor - woooohoooo
a solid plantium idol to Shar,
a huge collection of simple silver bracelts
and some kind of half-finished tapestry of an elf.

The only things I sold were:

The solid platinum idol, smashed and melted for coins. Worth 100 PP.
The giant mother-of-pearl statue we returned to the main Peloran church in Neverwinter, and they were kind enough to bequeath 9000 GP salvage rights to us.
The wines out of the wine and glassware set (kept the glassware)
We sold the bracelets, they were worth 5000.
And the tapestry was worth 15 gold.

Which left me with:

A roaring copper dragon statue adorning the mantlepiece in my small room at the mage academy

A statue of a nude nymph to overlook the legendary acts of hedonistic debauchery that go on in my small room at the mage academy ;)

A crystal glass set to use when company is over

A Very Expensive Masterwork Dagger I'm keeping as my own personal weapon. (Thinking of having it enchanted at some point.)

An ENORMOUS, flawless, 1 inch wide by 1 inch deep by 1 centimeter tall diamond, that I think I'm going to make the focal point of some magic item at some point. (That, or make as bling to give away to some NPC my character has heartthrobs for)

A collection of other gems which will be handy magically, or also made into bling... Possibly magical bling.

A pipe organ that is now gracing the academy's chapel

And a collection of jewelry.

So yeah. I don't think my DM was ready for the fact that if you hand a player ready-made bling, they may pimp out their own crib, as opposed to selling it all for more lewt.





For me, one thing that Art objects can be used for is minor plot hooks. A carved pewter goblet is just treasuer, but a pewter goblet carved with the image of a dragon taking gifts from dwarves, or with goblins fighting elves, or a set of holy symbols helps give a richer history to the world, and perhaps imply little plot bits. Also, if they need it appraised by an art expert, you can have him look at it and go "well, that is interesting...." and explain history, or why something seems out of place.

Just out of curiosity what does the BBBBEG (bling bling big bad evil guy) have in his torture chamber? Gold plated Iron maidens? Diamond studded racks?




I had a DM once give out a 15ft high crystal pillar weighing about 200 pounds. We needed to hijack a cart to loot that one. This was the same guy who gave us 20,000 copper peices as a bandit haul.




You know, I just happened to really take towards placing situational art objects as treasure in my last game, and I really did like the effect. I think I have some examples in my old notes. Ah, here are the notes from an ancient sacrificial temple

(excerps from various rooms):
•The skeletons are easily identified as hobgoblins, but closer inspection reveals that they are somewhat short for such and would appear to be a more primal breed than is currently seen. In the hands of one of the skeletons is a ornate electrum ceremonial dagger with a star ruby inset in the handle, worth 800 gp.

•A faded, yet mostly intact tapestry is along the western wall, showing a black-skinned, taloned and winged figure with crimson eyes holding out something as if offering. If fully restored (such as with Make Whole) each tapestry is worth 500 gp, though a buyer might be hard to find.

•Also in the drawer is a gold idol of the same ilk seen on the tapestry, worth 800 gp.

•Resting on a ledge projecting from the pulpit is a silver chalice with a ruby inset into its bottom, worth 700 gp. It is still filled with water, though cast an eerie red hue by the gem.

•Also in the room, propped against the dias is a bejeweled ceremonial scepter, worth 4,000 gp.

Heh, I also had a very difficult encounter set with most of the treasure placed as a sorcerer's personal possessions, including a pair of fine mahogany tables, several ivory crests, a gold-threaded tapestry, a renowned painting, and to top it all off, a large golden statue of the sorcerer itself. I remember chuckling at the placement of the tables, as I really didn't see the party hauling off fine furnature to sell. But all told it provided a wealth of functional treasure, as well as painting a good picture of an excessively opulent hall.




Notable art objects I've used in my campaign:

Idol of the god of madness: An obsidian pillar (about 1' tall) studded with dozens of eye-shaped yellow topazes.

Cloak made of demon wing leather, complete with big metal shoulder pads.

Adamantine silverware set.
Adamantine farm tool set.
(These sent the dwarf weaponsmith PC into fits)




Think of the fits your party druid will have over all those pets, especially those made from wild species.

As for the furniture, and the rare elven wine, I'd stand those at more value. Wine collectors pay thousands in the real world. My dad used to work for Baker furniture before they shipped all their business down south. You'd be surprised at what rich people pay for pressboard covered over with fancy veneers. Even before stuff like pressboard, a solid oak table was a valuble family heirloom. Even if your table and chairs are oak with a fancy veneer, they will be very valuble. Inlay and guilding will also drive up its value. The more hours a crafter has to put into an item, the more expensive it will be.

I'll have to keep this in mind when I play Sims next. There's a lot of luxury items in there too.

What about houseplants? Most modern houseplants are derived from tropical species. Watch your party druid go nuts about that precious rare tropical plant taken from its native envronment.

Fountains also show wealth. Try and cart that off.

If you're going to have fancy cookpots, don't forget those rare spices. Even simple black pepper was once a highly valuble trade comodity. Salt was coinage, once upon a time. The salt mephit in a jar could be rather handy.




Sundries:

Dwarvish Chocolate
The good stuff. Golden box containing squares of exquisitely good, very fine chocolate, individually wrapped in gold foil. Yummy!

Orkish Coffee
Vile-tasting brew favored by orcs, kobolds and some wizards. Strong enough to strip paint and peel your eyelids off. Will keep you awake and alert for hours, maybe days, whether you want to or not. Does not come in decaf.




It may not be Art, but non magical relics can be worth a lot. Imagine how much a wizard may pay for some bones of Raistlin, Mordenkainen or Elminister. Or a cleric for a non magical weapon used by a saint or a big hero of his religion.

I would like to see what the players do after they have killed the BBEG, and found a simple non magical stone in an altar covered with diamonds and gold. The stone is worth millions to any high cleric of certain religion, but my guess is that the players will leave it behind




-A bottle of water from the River Styx. Another souveneir from the BBEG's trip to the Nine Hells.
-Baby seal loafers.



I'll be sure to add more to my dungeon catalog when I've got more time. I hope you have as much fun making your PC's try to sort & sell all of this crap as I will :D


ShadowDragon8685
melpomene
zombiegleemax
iyestorm
chosen_of_the_dark_sun
akorpanda

[Bullet06320]

As for magical items, I've had so many players ignore things that didn't look like magic items it's not funny. They loot every sword, shield, armor, wand-like object, book, scroll, ring, brooch, etc, but ignore everything else. Sometimes they will even drop the items above that may be valuable just because it's not magic.

Art objects would be just the place to hide many magic items. Some beneficial, to the owner, and some just really annoying...


For example:

A silver hair brush that magically removes any knots in your hair while you brush

An ornate wash-basin that will fill with warm soapy water on command (The PCs in my game pull this one out whenever they rescue a prisoner "here, clean yourself up. Being seen with someone who is dirty and stinky will ruin our image."

A magical gem encrusted carving knife which never needs sharpening.

A silk pillow of sleeping for the wealthy narcoleptic (casts "sleep")

make some of the fancy pants art objects...animated objects

A fine painting of a landscape with happy trees, and a twisting river... that changes with the seasons.

Unhallow can be cast on other things, not just a skull carved from ebony. Simply put it on a simple statue and the PCs might have a hell of a time getting it back home, and then more fun when it is home. Gotta hate that Circle of Protection against Good...

Anti-plant shell on a pair of hedge clipper.

Awaken on a pulled bell in the servants quarters to summon sevants at any time day or night.

Calm Emotion on a run placed befor the throne to calm unruly visitors...

Detect Lies on an Ear Horn, you know, the thing you need when you are hard of hearing.

Dominate Person on a nice chair, or set of chairs, that the host pulls out personally for his honored guests...

Knock places on a large, ornate key that is in a drawer with other large ornate keys, all of which do not fit any lock in the building...

Know Direction placed on a sextant, handy for overland and ocean voyages, since you will always know direct north.

Levitate on a small carpet, useful for servants to do the dusting in your great hall with the 50ft high valued cieling.

Magic Mouth on any object that proclaims in a loud voice who owed it whenever it is touched...

Maze placed on any extremely valuable item. Do you really want to take every gold statue in the room?

Resist Elements(water) placed on an umbrella.

Tasha's Hideous Laughter placed on a feather duster.

True Seeing placed on a mirror. You see the truth about what is viewed in the reflection. Hand held mirrors would work best, since it's easier to conceal that you are looking at others rather than yourself.

Enchanted Coffee Mug
Ceramic mug bearing a cutesy saying such as "Chaotic Nasty" or "Life's a Lich". On command, cup magically fills with hot coffee. Quality and variety of coffee varies from item to item. (see Orkish Coffee)

Cue of Accuracy
Pool cue with an silver inlaid tip. Mystic symbols are inscribed in the shaft. Adds +2 to users proficiency in Billiards. May also be used as a quarterstaff with no plusses.

Ever-Full Lunch Pail
Tin case embossed and painted with images of famous figures of legend (Elminster, Drizzt Duodenum, the Dukes of Hazzard, etc.). When opened, contains a sandwich, a cookie, a piece of fruit and a beverage. Every time it is opened, it is full with a different tpe of food.

Platinum Hubcap
Ornate platinum disc studded with diamonds. No discernable magic, but it must be worth lots. According to legend there are four of them in total and if they are ever brought together they will summon the Great Celestial Cadillac. Occasionally one will turn up in my campaigns, but so far no one has collected all of them.

Secretarial Golem.
Golden statue of a woman, about 8 inches tall. A magical servant who takes dictation, organizes messy labs, arranges appointments and such for busy wizards.

32gp~ a pan magically enchanted to be non-stick.

50 GP~ a knife that can 3 times a day spawn a djinn who can do nothing else but cook.

57gp~ A protrait of the BBEG's mother that is magically enchanted to nag allll the time, it's only worth anything because the frame which is nonremovable, is made of mahogany chased with silver.

a dartboard with playing darts of returning

a magical Platinum coin that while having only 2 sides, can come up as any one of 12 sides?

A super-fancy teapot with a command-activated Heat Metal spell on it - for when you just don't want to go all the way across the mansion to get your bedtime tea. Add a custom blended stash of teas, self cleaning tea balls, never-chip china cups, and a dancing tea cosey just for the entertainment value.

2000 gp
The Clapper: Amazing! Just by clapping your hands two times, you can light all of the torches in a single room! Clapping your hands one time will put out the same amount of torches in the room. Good for up to 20 light sources.

15000 gp
Moving-Lights-Floor: Be the talk of the underground with this baby. 50' x 50', each one foot tile lights up as one of 4 random colors. Fantastic for dancing parties, or just plain fun for the torture chamber!

3000 gp
the Twister: Right hand blue.... OR ELSE! This entertaining torture device provides hours of amusement. Set up to eight victims on this 4' x 8' rug. There are 5 different color circles in rows of eight. Failure to place the correct body part on the desired circle results in a moderate electrocution. Body part and color of circle are determined byt twirling a small arrow attached to a small wooden block.

Barbells of lifting These heavy steel weights have a transmutation efect, so that anyone lifting them will be treated as having a greater strength for the purpose of lifting objects. The increase is such that lifting the weights themselves is just within your capability (no point having barbells if you don't get a good workout), to a maximum of +10. This may not help much in combat, but boy, will it make you feel manly!

A genetically (or magically) modified basilisk that turns everything it gazes as to gold instead of stone.

Rare insence burning in ornate holders. Thats gotta be worth alot, though not that useful exept for affect or as a spell componant.

A tree that grows several different kinds of fruit. (i've heard this is possible by taking young branches off other trees and adding them to the original connecting two areas from under the bark and tying it so its stays. They should grow together. tis is a lengthy and difficult process so it would be worth alot. or could be donated to the starving people. unless its in his garden, then what do you do?)

a snowglobe that instead of snowing when you shake it up performs some natural disaster (like a tornado) in the innocent little snowglobe town. Or shaking it the first time causes a disaster, shaking it another time fixes everything so that you can shake it again and cause another disaster.

a gold plated hourglass with a pair of bronze hands cuped at the falling point as though they were desperately trying to hold the sand in, and an empty bronze skull at the bottom of the pile, mouth open swallowing all the sand.

Or they could be continual permanent Silent Images inside each globe of the hourglass. In the first globe theres a baby that continues to grow and get old until eventually he dies. In the second globe is a reaper trying to reach at the man through the sand, and when it runs out his arm slips through the hole and snatches the man's soul from his body. The great thing is it doesn't have to just be the man growing old. He could grow to a certain point and when the sand runs out get his head lopped off or falll from a cliff or any number of nasty deaths. They could even be the deaths of specific famous people.

A throne constructed of obsidian and gold, with fine velvet coushons, perminantly under the influence of the Levitate spell and capable of being controlled by the manipulation of a ball on the right hand armrest.

A fine china set all perminantly under the effect of Contingency: Make Whole, whenever they break.

(This one's good if your party has picked up a lot of fame and has posed for more than one painting in their career) The BBEG has quite a collection of portraits of the PCs lined up in his vault, with beards, horns, etc smeared onto them, or darts sticking out of various points, maybe a target painted on their face.

A full sized portrait of a Great Wurm Red Dragon leaned against the wall of a dragon's horde. with programmed illusion to wink at someone gazing on it



An ebony navel ring carved to resemble a tiny black skull, enchanted to prevent the wearer from becoming pregnant (or infested with any other internal parasite)




a Spoon collection would be a good time, especially if they're all by the same gnomish craftsman or something, spanning his long career of spoon making. The crown jewel being the lame magic item, Murlynd's Spoon. Which makes that bowl of warm, wet cardboard tasting gruel. (its a 1E Unearthed Arcana item. I doubt it made it to 3.5)


contributers: aliquid, quarkstomper, kayoz_majick, nurgan_the_drunked, gemmalah, ralvuimego and zombiegleemax




Just carve everything that's good into the place. Like a 10' throne made of solid diamond, inlaid with platinum and obsidian, with a dimensional anchor on it so the PCs can't steal it. Caching!




You do realize that PCs will go to great lengths to pry valuables from the dungeon, right? I've heard of DMs who had every single tile in the dungeon - and it was tiled wall, floor and ceiling - be a magic-blocking tile, because he wanted a good old dungeon crawl without any pesky magic like Passwall or anything else interfering. Once the dungeon crawl was done, the PC hired wagons, and he literally spent three weeks ripping every single tile out of the dungeon. The DM was kicking himself, because they were worth a damn mint.

So I woulden't put it past the PCs to carve said throne OUT of the dungeon wall and cart it away. A throne that's pure diamond and has a dimensional anchor on it would be worth quite a lot to a King. It's less about simply making everything super valuable, as making it so irresistable a domocile that the PCs want it for their own.



Have tons of coins of different value? Why not use the coins to create your own masterpiece. Yes, that's right. Simply order our "coin by number" painting and you too can have a famous work of art that is constructed using those coins that are laying about your lair. Never again be embarrassed to have company over. It makes a great conversation piece, and is fun at parties! We have multiple selections, and a variety of sizes. Sorry, coins not included.

Have you ever felt that your evil holy symbol wasn't big enough to get the job done? Do you seem to lack conviction when presenting it? Why spend a measly 25gp on a cheesy and small silver Holy symbol, when if you order now, you can have the deluxe ultra-mega obscenely lavish GOLD Holy Symbol. Yes, that's right. Brandish your new GOLD Holy Symbol and watch as peons and townsfolk run for their lives. Now I know your thinking, but Didge, that'll cost too much. No my friend, if you act quickly this item is on sale for the low, low price of 100 gp. So order now, before supplies run out!

Have you had one of those bad days where those pesky heroes stop your plans for world domination or total anhilation? Then you escape only to come back to your lair without inspiration on what to do next. Well now there's a reason to put the Doom back into your Day Plan. Yes, even after a sound beating by heroes isn't enough to knock down your spirits when you've got "Inspirational Bad-Guy Paintings". Yes, no matter how gloomy you are, you can't help but look at these and get re-motivated to take on the world...again! You can order yours with your face/likeness standing over the carnage of countless bodies or your likeness high atop a mountain with lightning flickering from your hands destroying the village below. Either one is guarenteed to put the fight back in you*.

*Warning, any and all likelihood of actual success rests solely in the buyer's cunning, survivability, and mostly luck. This company does not guarentee that your plans for world domination or anhilation will actually succeed.

Can't remember which hero did what to annoy you and when, or what their fatal downfall might be? Well fear no longer. For with the NEW BBEG's Day Planner you too can remember key heroes weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Covered in the skin of a wrymling Black Dragon, this books exterior exudes a sense of style, elegance, and taste. A fine lockable clasp made of silver ensures that no matter where it is left, the secrets inside are safe. The Day Planner has over 100 pages, and is compact enough to fit snugly inside your shirt pocket. Each page has a diabolical quote uttered by some of the most renown villians from the past and present. Never again fear sounding like you don't know what you're doing, simply utter one of these at your enemies and know that it was a classic then and still is one now.

Brought to you by zombiegleemax




Did you guys see Dungeon 121? It had a list of 100 useless items. My favorite was 77, a torn tapestry depicting a battle between badgers and mummies.




Wine Celler
Dragon has a collection of fine wines and glasses. On the table is a crystal bottle with gold inlay and an Amethyst stopper, inside is a fine elvish wine which just met maturation. It was meant to be drank by the dragon in celebration of the death of his arch enemy, an annoying copper dragon. The wine itself is worth 200gp, and the bottle is worth 300 gp (250 from the amethyst stopper). In the wine rack has 34 bottles of wine, some of which have matured, some have not. Their types range from human wines, elvish wines, gnomish wines, a halfling cherry wine, and even some apparantly draconic recipes, and even a bottle of "Ol' Oli's finest", a wine recipe supposedly created by Olidammara himself that is considered thge finest wine in the world. If it was full it would be worth 2000 gp, however it is 1/3 drunk so its worth has dropped to 700 gp. He has a collection of wine glasses, that are made of varying materials, including delicate crystal glasses and fine jewel studded gold and silver goblets. The total of the glasses can be sold for 800gp, however half of that value is in crystal glasses which can shatter easily. Also found is a small desk with some writing in draconic (a journal). A DC 15 Decipher Script reveals it to be a journal. Anyone who can read draconic can read it and identifies what it is immediately. It mostly chronicles his day to day affairs, the only part that is interesting is when he mentions that when he drinks red wine from gold and silver goblets he imagines its the blood of his enemies.





Some players love unusual treasures, even if their monetary value isn't that high, because they have a high coolness factor.

Or maybe the BBEG's gilded backscratcher IS a magic wand...(how many PCs would want to take home a backscratcher??) Make them regret not taking home the stuff that looks mundane once in awhile. (I mean, the golden toilet paper holder doesn't have to be magical.)

The Silver Plated Pixie Skull Shotglass set would be just right as a present for the more morally corrupt in your life as well.

Osyluth in a Jar: This is a large block of crystal, enhanced and strengthened with magic. Inside is a bone devil, perfectly preserved (alive or dead is your choice). An excellent conversation piece sure to liven up any collection.

Tarrasque Exhibit: An oak case the size of a table or larger, lined with velvet and with a glass cover holds one or more bones from a Tarrasque, such as claws, skull fragments or pieces of the carapace.

Let's not forget classics, like gold teeth, or embedded gems... or just using gems for teeth (like Cohen the Barbarian, or discworld trolls), gem studded eye patches, enchanted peg legs/arms/heads, a nice sahuagin skin diamond studded and gold threaded collar for a hellhound pet/ally, or bonded staff. PCs may or may not kill a goblin jester who was cursed to remain always in a certain room, or within a certain radius of, say, a very nice enchanted sword the pcs want, but they'll certainly be surprised when an evil type did something evil with his money.

Ancient artifacts- yes, it may look like a crappy old piece of pottery, but the dragon/lich/whatever remembers getting it when it was first made... 20,000 years ago. To the right collector, musty dusty junk is invaluable, moreso than coins, at least.

Maps- antique maps are valuable for the same reasons as artifacts, but also for clues as to where things used to be, or what they used to be called, as well as artistic value.

The best thing about art objects is ANYTHING can be treasure. Just pick up and snooty mail order catalog and have a look at the overpriced junk they are pawning off as 'collectables'...

Cloth of gold, silks, satins, embroidered with silver or gold wire. Hell, a villains closet could be worth a fortune, but only to somefur who likes that kind of style. Sure every piece cost him 300gp, but would you wear the chartrues silk robe with magenta collar and cuffs and the 18in diameter symbol of Lolth worked in gold thread across the back? Have fun finding a buyer for that!

a large flawless white pearl roughly one foot in diameter, with continents carved into the surface and precious gems used to mark landmarks, cities, etc. Additionally, gold wire is used to mark latitude and longitude. Comes with fine polished oak stand.

For BBEGs in love with themselves: Giant nude paintings of themselves

How about this for adding to the decor: A rakshasa-fur rug, just like those tiger and bear rug typically found in castles?

-a lump of ice from the lower planes. It never melts
-half of a "gold" golem
-two dead titans. In stasis.
-the tip of a sword measuring 10'x20'
-the front archway from a devil's castle in the hells
-a huge pillar of pure adamantine
-a dead pit fiend, impaled upon an enchanted lance

Why not make the BBEG the treasure? I have the stats of a red dracolich who was so vain, he got his skeleton plated with rubies to keep his color.

And gem dragons? Their hide alone! (whether actually gemstones or not) would make any collector sweat. Heck, Any dragon skin would make good treasure, especially if it was say, tied up as a lavash tuxedo or curtain.

What kind of gaming group would throw away dice made from rare gems or drangon teeth?

How about a deck of cards w/gold leafing and embossing

Shimmerling Glow Tube: Glass tubes flow through the building. Inside are shimmerling swarms.

Dread blossom garden: In a greenhouse. Construct servants tend to the flowers as they have no blood they will be fine.

An orrery showing the orbit of the solar system that world is in

A intricate glass structure with positive and negative energy rivers floating through. A tree complete with animals is in it. The negative energy kills everything, and then the positive energy resurrects it.

a permanent Illusion of servants. The Illusion is right were unseen servants are

Pets make awesome treasure.
Sometimes the PCs might just want to keep some of the cooler ones.
-Griffons. Purebred. Won many races of course. And pampered and only given the finest meat.
-A tank full of fish from the river Styx. Carefull, those fiendish goldfish may bite.
-A astral kraken larva enchanted to remain small
Exotic plants must fill the grounds, endangered. Guaranteed to set the druids off. Oh, for more druid-enfuriating fun, fey gardeners.

The Dolphin Ring:
Carved from a single piece of emerald, the ring is a pair of dolphins crossing each other, as if in mid leap, joined at the bottom, where their tails should be. While not magical, the ring has been masterfully carved and polished and is a thing of beauty, as well as value. (1,100 gp)

The Beauty of Dusk:
In the courtyard is a statue of a girl in the nude, standing demurely, long hair flowing over one shoulder. The statue is life sized and carved from smoky quartz, giving the piece a beautiful translucent softness. The beauty has been well placed in the garden, for in the evening, when the sun goes down, a single shaft of dying light touches her, causing the statue to glow with warmth. The marble pedestal on which she stands has the phrase ‘The Beauty Of Dusk: Forever Beautiful’ carved into it, all in capital letters.
Unfortunately, the Beauty was once a very real, very live sixteen year old girl that the BBEG took an interest in and then turned to stone. (As a side note, why is it that people always think boring old grey rock when they use flesh to stone? If you’re going to make statuary, I’d want it to at least be marble.)

The knife collection:
The BBEG has a thing for knives. No, a serious thing for knives. He collects them from all over the place and has them meticulously displayed in cases with tags detailing where he got them, when they were made and who made them, if known. He has simple little eating knives, old rusty knives that he dug up from some dungeon, expensive knives from the best smiths in the land, exotic knives from foreign places. He has knives with dragon bone handles and rubies inset, knives with the finest Damascus blades, big knives, small knives and every size in between. But he doesn’t have any magical ones, because he loves the purity and workmanship without the magic. His collection is totally without a magic blade in it though it is still worth a fair bit to the right people. To adventurers, it’s not worth very much, really and they will have to find the right buyer or sell it off a piece at a time.

The Loyal Steed:
This is a life size cast bronze statue of a war horse standing over his fallen knight, one hoof raised to ward off attackers. It is the final masterwork by the famous sculptor Venchensi and is so detailed that the rivets on the horse’s barding and the knight’s armor have been included, as well as the broken sword and the water streaming off the horse’s body into the mud where the knight lays.
The statue weighs in at almost sixteen hundred pounds and will be difficult to move but is also worth 10-20,000 gp to a collector in a big city.

For the Evil Bard in life, The Musical Instrument Collection:
What bard, good or evil, could resist collecting musical instruments? This collection has a superb example of all the finest musical instruments that are commonly played in the land, from beautiful drums to fine lutes, dulcimers, mandolins, traveling harps, floor harps and even an organ. All of them are in good condition and each could fetch a fine price, but, like all instruments, they are delicate and will take some effort to transport and almost as much to sell off.

The Historian:
This is more a type of BBEG than specific items. The Historian is fascinated with the history of some specific time and place and does his best to collect the artifacts (non magical ones this time) of that time and place. If there was a mighty mage war where tens of thousands died, he studies that. If a group of hero’s died to the man defending a pass or town, he studies that; whatever takes his fancy, he devotes his spare time and resources to studying. He has books on the subject, artifacts that he has collected (or paid someone to collect) for him including old coins, broken ceramics, rusty weapons and armor and the skeletons of fallen warriors. He displays them all throughout his home/lair in carefully prepared locations and display cases. His prize possessions though are a collection of rare broken or expended magical items. The Broken Sword of Sir Frostbank, the expended wand of fireballs that the great mage Nightbane used in his last stand and the things of that sort are what this BBEG collects. None of it has any real value except to collectors and historians, but some of it may lead to quests for other items and treasures that do have value.
As a side note, a big inspiration for this idea came from the third book of the Black Company. Credit where credit is due and all.

As for the "Bard theme".
I just had to respond! Bling bling music items!

Every room has his own tune, in 'magic mouthed' amulets:
* Toilet: little harp playing "raindrops keep falling on my head".
* Armory: small orchestra "eye of the tiger".
* Bathroom mirror: female voices "boodylicious".
* Bedroom: deep dwarven voice "sexual healing".

Luxury food counts as "art", right?
A few ideas:
Life-sized chocolate quasit: Actually a product of a flesh to chocolate spell, imported straight from the battlefields of the Blood War. Has a scrawled note attached, saying "Remember not to eat this one yet; Vrischika won't get a new shipment from the 'loths anytime soon." 50 GP to people with taste.

Sugar-glazed chocolate dragon egg: Tastes wonderfully, but it'll kill your diet. 300 GP due to rarity

Bottled elemental water: Any water you drink after this will taste dirty in comparison. 5 GP a bottle

A keg of abyssal Blood-Brew. Anything without fiendish heritage that drinks this extremely foul-tasting brew must make a DC 20 fortitude save or lose 1d20 CON. However, when did a true gourmet care about possible death? Only brewed on the 587th layer of the Abyss, so it's worth a fair bit. 400 GP for the keg, 10 GP for a mug.

Illithid Special: Apparently, illithids find this tasty. Stored in a stasis tank, so you won't have to worry about the expiration date.
0 GP from anything that isn't an illithid, 2-300 GP if you sell it to an illithid.

A partially finshed sculpture of the BBEG chiseled out of marble.

The beginnings of a painting of the country side already signed by the BBEG (paranoid about plagarism maybe?)

His fifteen paint brushes and forty two mixtures of various color paints, including one rather ominously marked "Blood Red"

A series of woodcarved animal miniatures, ranging from pumas to trouts to giraffes to displacer beasts, of exquisite detail, some painted, some not, and on with a primer and some initial painting near the head.

For a vampire there could be a wine rack with multiple bottles labeled things like "Human, 62" and "Elf, 351" or "Shepard, 17" and "Halfling Virgin, 23".

A bookshelf of 150 rare, famous, or outlawed books, treatsies, and manuals, each one expertly illuminated and gilded, mixed in with a series of the BBEGs own musings and ideas.

An enchanted wash basin that keeps the water permanently warm and uses Prestidigitation to clean the feet the moment the enter the water.

Mood appropriate everburning torches of different colors. Green for the garden at night, blue and violet for the library. Special throneroom, dinner room, and bed room torches that change colors on command and know 42 different colors, ranging from yellow to fuscia.

* Ancient coins, green with verdigris
* Illuminated (illustrated, not glowing) manuscripts picked out in golden ink and colored with lapis lazuli
* Dusty bottles of elven wine, sealed with blue wax
* Stained glass windows
* Decanters brimming with halfling brandy
* A spotless red temple cat

Beats the heck out of 100 gp or a silver bracelet, no? While the gp value of these treasures could be about the same as a standard chunk of coins, these treasures are all a little more memorable..."

A tropical bird collection.
A bunch of colorful birds in golden cages. Depending on how many birds and how colorful they are this could range any where from 200gp (1 pretty ordinary bird in a golden cage) to 20,000 (12 very colorful birds in golden cages).
I did this with my party and they loved it, they hauled 7 birds back to their house and were woken up in the middle of the night to the party barbarian eating the birds...

In my campaign the party encounters a series of tombs, ruins and so on containing ancient treasures. At one point they find several hundred assorted coins, gold, silver, electrum, copper but they are all over a 1000 years old. The blue book value is about 10x the face value because of the age, but if they are all "liquidated" at the same time, it will depress the market on collector coins to about 5x face value.

Exquisite carved alabaster perfume vial, 150 GP blue book, antique value @ 400GP

They find a magical ancient bronze broadsword, with special traits that have protected a site for hundreds of years.

Carved jade holy symbols, but of an evil diety.

Mundane arrows from the oriental area (frog crotch, humming bulb, armor piercing, etc.) in a non-oriental setting.

Ornate saddle and other tack for horses, oxen or other beasts.

A heavy silver goblet with a single blue gem on the rim. If the contents of the goblet are poisonous, the gem changes to red.

Ornate broaches for pining together a cloak.

5 pretty stones in a pouch. These are to arrange in patterns to help meditation.

Carved Ivory comb

Longsword scabbard for hanging on a saddle.

Bolts of silk (for the "Mongol trick". They always wore silk shirts under their armor. It isn't really pierced well by arrows and the shirt will show the "twist" of the arrow and the direction of it's rotation, so it can be removed with less damage.)

Writing kits with ink and "Steel Quills".

[Bullet06320]

I was always a fan of grand libraries filled with cheesy romance novels. As a bonus, tear spots on the sad/really romantic parts.

And what better way to store your books than a bookshelf made of dryads and their trees? Or if you're on a budget, just carve the shelves to look like dryads.




In addition to romance novels, you could have a set of books with titles like "Griffin Soup for the Tiefling's Soul" and "Lycanthropy and You." Nothing is more evil than the self-help industry.




And, of course, "How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Enjoy Evil - 'If I am Ever the Evil Overlord Updated and Expanded Eddition with Anotations and Examples from across the Planes' "


Gutherbert's Bibles:
The sages of Gutherbert monestary have a long history of beautifully illustrated tomes on every subject. But the finest of all were the 'Gutherbert Bibles'. These massive tomes are twenty inches across, tweny four inches tall, and nearly six inches thick. They contain nearly 500 pages of impecable calligraphy and full colour paintings. The covers are made of duskwood, covered in durable chimera leather that has been dyed to match the colors of that bibles covered god. The corners are reinforced with platinum, the covers are locked with a mithril clasp, and the edges of the paper pages are leafed in gold.

There is a bible for each god/religion (ie. a Kord bible, a Pelor bible, a Gruumsh bible), and the bible covers every aspect of that religion. A bible weighs nearly forty pounds, and can fetch 2500gp from a collector. The steep price ensures that only major cathedrals and the wealthiest of private owners can afford such a luxury. A complete set (one bible of each religion) has never been collected, but would be worth an astronomical sum to any Sage or library.

Bryth'Tanria Encyclopedia of the Arcane:
Centuries ago, the elvish wizard college of Bryth'Tanria underwent a project that took their scholars several human lifetimes to complete; A complete library on the treatise and theories of each school of arcane magic. The volumes are twelve inches across, eighteen high, and two and a half deep. They have roughly 250 pages of material, written in silver ink on rare elvish rice paper. The covers of the Encyclopedia are made of burnished gold.

There is one encycopedia volume for every school of arcane magic (ie. necromancy, illusion, evocation, chronomancy et cetera). The tomes are written in archaic elvish and most well-traveled wizard has seen at least one volume of the set in his/her lifetime. Only the largest of magical schools could afford the entire collected encyclopedia, as each volume is worth nearly 3000gp alone. Some wealthy wizards will collect a single volume or two, corresponding to their specialized schools of magic.

Ye Abominations Almanac
An illustrated catalogue of monsters, describing habits, habitats, diets and other helpful information. Much of it is accurate. Some editions have marginal notes from previous owners and related spells.

Ars Metamorphosis (The Art of Metamorphosis)
Book of poetry written in the Archaic tounge with copious illustrations. Ancient tales of love and enchantments. Must be over 18 to purchase in most cities. (Some of the poems are spells, so reading aloud from the book can be dangerous)

The Art of War
An old book in the oriental tounge by a famous general of the Eastern Continent. Some editions have been translated into the Archaic language and other languages. A collection of aphorisms about strategy and tactics illustrated by examples from history.

The Craft of Venus
A book of erotic spells. If you happen to be into that sort of thing.

Merggin's Book of the Sword
Training manual on swordsmanship and combat ettiquite.

Necromacy for Fun and Profit
If you happen to be into that sort of thing.

On the Slaying of Dragons Memoirs of a famous dragon slayer.
Personal ancedotes mixed with hearsay dragon lore. Semi-reliable. Occasionally one can be found in a dragon horde, the property of a foolish knight who fell victim to the book's innaccuracies, and which the dragon has annotated with corrections, glosses, and ironic commentary.

The Prince
Guide to intrigue and practical politics by a master courtier.

Zen and the Art of Dungeon Maintenance
Techical information about constructing underground labyrinths, devising traps, stocking with monsters, etc.

Elminsters compendium of cooking volume 2, now with recipes that won't blow you up. worth 27gp

The Tome of infinate useless dates
when opened an extraplanar mouth appears and tell you any date you need, except for ones that are useful. worth 100gp

The chronicles of Shadowdale
written by a legendary the elf wizardess Serinda and edited by her husband it's a history of the first 1100 years of the world after a noach-like flood. It has hundreds of sub-books and discusses everything you can think of(Serinda and her husband spent hundreds of years traveling and taking notes before writing it). Extremely expensive for the whole thing. Whole Set - 300,000gp.

The complete and un-edited Book Of Tavern Songs: 5,000 gp to a bard (+10 perform checks on non-nobles)
Note: only while in the bards possesion.



A bookshelf filled with books:
'my first undead'
Necromancy for dummies
zombie care and matinence
How to become a lich in 3 easy steps
Practice excersises for evil monologs (with examples of what to do and what not to do)
The Evil Overlords guide to lair decoration. (rule 1 never leave this book in view)
its good to be bad!
The autobiography of another BBEG
Suggestion Suggestions (a self help book on how to effectivley use a suggestion spell and wording it correctly)
The Evil Lords guide to chatting up women (mostly pages full of Dominate person)
The needlework and knitting handbook!
Help others or help yourself? (work on the benifits of being bad)
Breeding dire rats for fun and profit.
101 quick quips for the middle of battle
My EVIL PLANS (has explosive runes inside)
A cookbook specialising in meals that easily descise the taste of poisons
A pamphlet from the Evil Minions Union.


other contributers: wereooze, zombiegleemax and quarkstomper



Here's an wondrous item I just made...by chosen_of_the_dark_sun

Looters Joy-
This item always apears as a 6" gold and silver sculpture of a hooded rogue putting a miscellaneous object into an open sack. Twice per day, the item can be ordered to "Loot this bling!" (you can just substitute something else for the command ;) ). The sculpture will then transform into any vehicle the user chooses (typically a wagon or boat), but will always have a gold inlaid wood door leading into the interior of the vehicle.
Inside the interior, it opens into an extra dimensional space similar to a bag of holding but much bigger. This space is the size of a small fortress, aproximately 800' by 1000' and with a 70' high ceiling, and is formed much like a cargo area of a ship, with wooden walls and pillars all around it, and the lighting can be changed depending on the users desire, as can temperature. It is all one large space, rather than separate rooms, and the walls are lined with small compartments filled with miniature chests, barrels, and about every conceivable type of storage container immaginable. These containers will revert to normal size upon command.
Immediately, several unseen servants stream out of the door and begin looting. They take anything they are ordered by to take, and bring it inside of the vehicle, where they sort it using the barrels and chests. These servants are identacle to those in the spell unseen servant, but have a strength score of 38, allowing them to lift incredibly heavy objects. Any item too large to fit through the door momentarily shrinks to a size allowing for passage. Therefore, you could order one of the servants to grab a large bed, and it would do so, taking the object inside of the vehicle and putting it in storage. No object can be harmed by careless lifting, since the servants have incredible balance and are as gentle as possible. These servants cannot be ordered to do anything besides loot or help loot, so you can't have one cook your next meal.
The item is non-flammable, as are all objects put inside. Object put inside can not be damaged in any way, and are safe from rot and decomposition. Living creatures inside do not need air, water, or food. Time inside seems to progress normally, although while inside time is actually frozen, so one could spend years inside and walk out at the same moment that they entered.
This item has two obvious purposes, a mobile base and an icredibly large storage facility, and it does both jobs to perfection. In vehicle form, it moves at the same speed of a normal vehicle of it's type. However, it does not have anything such as weapons, so if someone were to use this a warship, they would need to supply there own armaments. However, because of the nature of the vessel, these armaments cost twice as mush to add to the ship, and don't appear in any other form the item might take.

Medium Wondous Item; CL 13, Craft Wondrous Item, Unseen Servant, Fabricate, Mordenkainens Magnificent Mansion, creator must have at leat 3 ranks in Craft (sculpting) skill; Price 20,000 gp; Weight 1 lb.

I just made this really quick, so if anyone has any questions, just ask. I'm not to experienced at making magic items, so if anyone has any suggestions, please tell me.

Need to loot the BBEG's armory? No problem, just whip this baby out and start looting!
Need to rest or plan while inside said BBEG's fortress? Just use it again!



*cracks kunckles* I'll take a crack at it, using an example and some of the great things already proposed.

Many wizards live in isolated towers in the wilderness, ramshackle affairs of stone and wood held together more often than not by magic and riddled with traps and monsters to deal with intruders. But when the Lady Gethsemane (a NE 18th-level elf wizardess aiming towards lichdom) decided to take over the realm, she wanted something a little...different. Something that spoke of style and class (and that wouldn't draw pesky do-gooder adventurer types like flies to honey).

So she sank some of her considerable fortune into the construction of a grand mansion, located well within the capital city's limits. The circular wall encompasses two acres of manicured parkland, constructed of a seamless solid platinum that reflects the sunlight in dazzling, kaleidoscopic patterns. The twin gates are slabs of black onyx, eight feet tall and wide, cored with refined adamant on the interior, and each slab is set with an intricately carved image, in purest gold, of a Solar, one male and one female. Each side of the gate is guarded by twin Iron Golems, each designed to resemble a knight of the realm, and each bears her personal emblem in gold on their armored-seeming chests, as well as a short sword designed for their frames. Around the entire circumference of the inner gate there is an Iron Golem evenly spaced at every thirty feet, to keep out the inevitable looters. Past the gate and an expansive greenswards is a miniature forest, with each tree sculpted by a master craftsman out of a variety of crystals and gems and stretching higher than the gates themselves (carefully out of reach of any clever thieves who might try to swing in via grappling rope). The multiple routes through the Crystal Forest (all done in bricks of solid gold) all merge into one path beyond it and leads the visitor past a series of twelve fountains, two on either side of the road. The base of each fountain is done in white marble, and standing on platinum pedestals to either side is a nude nymph, each holding a Decanter of Endless Water, and each frozen in place by a diamond tiara that holds them petrified until the owner decrees them returned to flesh. The tiara can petrify the nymphs, release them, or punish them if they try to disobey their master, which is the master of the estate. They cannot remove the tiaras themselves.

The fountains lead up to the grand estate, which sprawls over an acre and is constructed entirely of white marble and rare woods (nothing less than 1000 GP). The mansion rises five stories into the sky, built along the lines of an airy palace or a Roman villa. Gethsemane absolutely refuses to live like a hermit in a dank hole. The double doors are of steel-cored platinum, with a permanent Alarm spell on it (not to mention a Greater Stone Golem on either side and the Gargoyles up in the rafters). All the stained-glass and decorative windows are trapped (and most feature things like permanent Symbols of Pain, Weakness, Sleep, Stunning, and Death worked into the designs lest one forget this is a wizard's home). Each block of her home has her personal emblem set into the stones and pillars, in diamond, ruby, or emerald (also works great to get the rare adventurers off-balance so they ignore those pesky permanent Symbols worked into various floors and walls, especially down on the lower levels).

The levels beneath the main hall are stereotypical dungeons, but done with class. Naturally there are traps of various sorts, mazes, monsters (Gethsemane prides herself on her tamed Medusas, Phase Spiders, Gorgons, and Shadow Mastiffs), but the mistress of the estate does not tolerate dust, or rust, or anything of that nature. It would detract from the solid gold piping, and the great Crystal Maps. On each level, Gethsemane has placed a map made of purest blue crystal, which displays all the ways through each level...which of course leads only to the deadliest traps, but each map is worth about 10,000 GP if sold. There's also a treasure vault down here, solid platinum door, naturally, trapped as all hell, naturally. And completely empty except for the statues of Gethsemane, her former husband, and their son, all done by a team of Dwarven master craftsmen and totaling about 40,000 GP in rare materials and labor. Oh yeah, and the Mimics. Downstairs can also be found the wine cellar (ignore the twin Balor guards), constructed of the rarest woods and housing some vintages of wine not known to this plane of existence (each bottle in her cellar is either centuries-old, extremely rare, or from another plane, so the price ranges from 4,000 to 100,000 GP per bottle). Finally, one can find the (secret) entrance to the secondary stables, where Geth keeps her Nightmare-driven carriages (made of onyx, gold, and black steel).

The upper levels that are open to the public are much nicer. Tapestries made by dead masters of every race adorn the halls, often done in silk or other rare materials. The main hall features a fountain composed of three dragons' heads done in different materials (one in ruby, one in gold, and one in sapphire) that spew wine into the sky that drifts down into a golden basin. More nymphs in tiaras are about to serve the guests with food, wine, just about anything. Golden staircases lead to the upper levels, past the entrance to the "legitimate" stables (where throrough-bred racehorses of the most exacting pedigrees are kept near the tamed Griffins, all equipped with Horseshoes of Speed or Horseshoes of the Zepyhr). The public levels contain guest rooms with elegant paintings (500-12,000 GP worth), statues of Gethsemane and her family members can be found (all in gold), kitchens the size of football fields (with accompanying pantries, and all fully staffed and given silver and gold masterwork cooking utensils), and a colossal art museum with examples of different types of art from across the ages and cultures, many of which are unavailable to dedicated scholars. The library here is bigger than the kitchens, and lined with ancient tomes relating to philosophy (especially those of dead cultures), art, science, magical theory, romance, and fiction. Many of these books (like the collection of tomes attributed to the mythical philosopher Redgar) would sell for upwards of 100,000 GP on the open market and more to rare collectors and Sages. Wandering is not encouraged as the various traps (and Werewolf Lords, Weretigers, and Werebears who usually wander around disguised as staff in human form) deal with people who get too curious.

Finally there are the highest levels, restricted to Gethsemane and "valued guests". Here the nymphs are replaced by tamed Succubi (and Incubi, Geth's not dead yet), and the decor becomes...darker. Geth pays people to "liberate" rare works of art from the houses of the Drow Matron Mothers and Temples and bring them to her inner lairs. Many of these one-of-a-kind works also happen to be enchanted. One room, her "Room of Irony" contains rare treasures taken from the various faiths of Good and Law, but with a twist. Each treasure was once used in some way to bring shame or humiliation on the faith in question (such as the sword of a Paladin who got overzealous and murdered an innocent in the name of the God of Justice). The rooms of her 85-year-old son (who is interested in the arts of war), contain various weapons (all masterwork) from every culture, and many from dead civilizations (some enchanted). The boy's favorite weapon, a Sword of Life Stealing, hangs in plain view from a golden sheath. Aside from the Succubi servants, the bed of Copper Dragon bones, a few books, and the Golden Lion figurines, his room only contains masterwork tables of rare woods and golds, and his closet. His closet is adorned with clothes of silk and other fine materials, mostly in black. Gethsemane's been trying to teach him that just because they're evil doesn't mean they have to wear black or go around acting all depressed and moody, but he's a teenager in a phase. What are you going to do?

The lab not only contains standard wizards' experiments, but a few interesting things, such as a prototype steam engine "acquired" from a Gnomish colony that "disappeared" some time back, and an Intellect Devourer in a carefully maintained cage for live dissection. Despite the standard materials for Geth's home (platinum and gold, with crystal tables carved in the shape of Giants and Dragons), the lab seems nothing special. Until one finds the secret (and trapped) panel and finds the room with the tomes and charts of Gnomish science and Dwarven engineering (each priceless to their cultures since they either came from researchers killed after Geth had no more use for them or that "disappeared" from colonies and caravans. The great crystal globes of the world and some of the Planes in there could sell for well over 5,000 GP each, not just for the materials, but for the pinpoint accuracy they offer. Mapmakers and sages would find such things priceless. The nearby library offers the standard treasure trove of magical books (some of them trapped with Secret Pages, Explosive Runes, and Sepia's Snake Sigils, but also contains rare works of magical theory from some of the greatest sages and Archmages in the world's history (and some from other planes), stuff that you can't buy or find in libraries. Her collection could put many Royal Libraries to shame (and the Shadow Mastiffs, Vampires, Nightwalkers and Mummy Lords that roam about the Library keep it this way).

The real Treasure Room is up here, trapped, magically warded, and guarded by a pair of Iron Golems, an Abyssal Greater Basilisk, and a Nightshade on permanent duty. Inside, one can find the vast treasure horde one expects, but also little things, like the engagement ring of the realm's Crown Princess (absolute tragedy about that horrible, horrible bandit attack that took her and her fiancee...and no, those two low-level zombies in the sewers do not bear an uncanny resemblance to the missing couple, thank you very much!), the robes from a Lich, her dead husband's gold-encrusted diamond scepter from the old days, the egg of a Gold Dragon, and other such sentimental trinkets.

Finally there's Gethsemane's bedroom, shielded by an adamantine-cored onyx slab of a door etched with designs of Succubi and Naga, and shielded by yet more Greater Stone Golems, Dread Wrights, Spirit Nagas, and Nightshades. She only put a few rare paintings in her spellcasting sanctum. The good stuff's here. Ignoring the phylactery materials she keeps under her bed (because who would look there?), she has a painting of herself, her husband, and her son, only, there's something wrong with her husband's image. Frequent visitors note that the handsome lord's image seems to...deteroriate at odd times, becoming skeletal and horrid. At other times the picture changes and he seems to be screaming, pounding at the air, or reaching bony hands towards the painted image of Gethsemane yet never managing to touch her. Visitors also report an odd moaning coming from the picture. The bed is made entirely of silver dragon bones, with the head of a Silver, Gold, Copper, and Brass Dragon at each of the bed's four posts. Swan's down mattresses and an pillow enchanted with a permanent Sleep spell to ensure a good night's rest after a hard day of evil-doing, not to mention the bear-fur blankets.

The crystal writing table is strangely stained with blackness, and bears the craftsmanship of the Lower Planes. The Cube of Force on the table serves as a paperweight, while parchment made from the trees of sacred forests dedicated to the God of Nature sit next to a pen crafted from a Unicorn's horn and a golden inkjar filled with the blood of an Astral Deva. The Marvelous Pigments sit nearby, for when Geth feels artistic. The walk-in closet contains various things, Robes of the Archmagi, an Instant Fortress or two, dresses and lingerie of silk and satin made by the greatest fashion designers in the different planes of existence, you know, standard stuff. Be careful about the Eyes of Petrification mixed amongst the various gems, jewels, tiaras (magical and otherwise), and such in her jewelery box. There's a Mirror of Life Trapping in one corner of her room, kept carefully covered at all times by a red silk cloth ever since Geth's son got a little too curious when he was younger and had to be let out.

So what do you think? Enough bling to get the PCs interested in taking ownership if they evict the current proprietress



I know this thread was really old and dusty, but as I was whiling away the hours at work today, perusing historical threads, I came across this lovely little gem.

I was highly amused, and definately highly inspired with visions of sugared BBEG lairs dancing in my head.

Some of the things that came to mind (single rooms sadly, or even single items not necessarily non-magical) were rather.... devious

... somewhere in a BBEG dungeon/castle/whatever....
"You sucessfully disarm the 13 trams, and unlock the 7 locks on this adamantine plated steel door, set in magically reinforced worked granite. (door itself worth a fortune, if the silly PCs can ever get it out :D )
The door opens upon the most lavish room you have ever been witness to in your entire lives, and could never hope to furnish similarly in the rest of your adventuring careers.
The room itself is roughly 50' by 100', with the door in the middle of a short wall.
The floors are thickly piled with what looks to be the furs of every natural animal within 2 miles. Here and there, however, some of the floor can be seen; what looks to be 2" of glass poured over the rough floor, and magically hardened.
All of this pales against the furniture though; in the middle of the room, surrounding a 5' by 15' table carved from a single darkwood trunk are equally fantastic chairs, also carved as a single piece from darkwood. All eight of the chairs and the table have massive amounts of scroll work depicting oak leaves and mistletoe.
Set on the table is a set of pure platinum dishes; everything from plates, bowls, long stemmed glasses shaped like trees and flowers, to flatware with dryads on the handle.
Immediately to the left as you walk in, is a monstrous bed with a canopy. The bedposts are whole darkwood trunks that appear to be planted into the ground somehow, and still alive. These four trees/posts support a 10' square mattress so stuffed with down that if layed upon, you could get lost. The coverlets and canopy are matched in color: a deep maroon, almost a blood red, with what looks to be an accurate representation of the constallations sewed on in silver threading.
To the right, is a writing desk, can you guess? carved from a single piece of darkwood, with ash wood inlays on the writing surface of the holy symbol of (insert Good Diety here). There are stacks of paper in every cubby hole in the desk of the finest quality, and a diamond inkwell delicately cradling an adamantite tipped griffon feather.
Running down the longer walls is bookshelf after bookshelf. After a cursory glance, you determine the least expensive book of the lot to run at least 100gp. The book shelves have been cunningly carved from black walnut to resemble dryads holding the shelves aloft.
Spacing the bookshelves, every 10' or so, is a stunning statue of a nearly naked female elf wearing a gem encrusted tiara. These look almost alive, they are so well done. (bedroom elf? :D or not.... ;) )
At the farthest end of the room, directly across from you is a large altar of onyx. Inlayed on the top, and in the front, in sealed diamond dust is the holy symbol of (insert same Good Diety here as above). Strewn almost carelessly across the altar are platinum holy symbols, candlesticks, and other priceless knick-knacks that the Diety might appreciate.
Above the altar is a picture that looks as though a window to the outside, depicting the current season. As you stare a bit in wonder, you see a small red fox run across the picture!
To either side of the altar are huge 20' tapestries detailing legendary battles from a first person point of view, all done in metalic threads.

wow... that took a lot longer than I thought, but worth the effort, I think

here are some more items that a BBBBEG might own (bling-bling big bad evil guy)

Over stuffed reclining Throne- for those days when the whining minions are just too much. available in cloth, hand worked leather (of your choice) or fur (also of your choice). Stuffed to bursting with down from those pesky griffons. 500-1000gp

Concealed Floor Safe- excellent for those annoying maurading adventurers. Comes with custom tiling design matched to your specifications. S/M/L
Small safe- 2'x2'x4'
Medium safe- 4'x4'x8'
Large safe- 10'x10'x20'
All safes are made of reinforced adamantite, lined with lead. Locking mechanism guaranteed to stall long enough for reinforcements to arrive.
Optional ceiling trap package available upon request! S/M/L - 1500/3000/10000gp, trap + 2000gp

Chandelier - available in multiple tiers. Useful for tasteful decoration in the troops feast hall, or to impress the late night torture victim.
Provides excellent illumination for any activity. Emerald, Ruby, Diamond, or Quartz styles in stock. Ask for more options when ordering.
Precious stone chandelier - 15,000gp
Semi-precious stone chandelier - 2000gp

Hot water Bathing Tub - for those Bad Guys that are meticulous in nature, and can't stop washing, or just to enjoy after a long day of summoning demons. Available in a solid marble block (with dwarven made piping) or in a Cast-iron Claw-footed model (made with real dragons claws). Just turn the faucet, and "Presto!", steaming hot water!
1300gp must provide own water source. we recomend enslaving a minor water and fire elemental.



From my vaults:

The Ogre Magus’ oriental gardens were very popular. Since the value is in the arrangement, hauling anything off to sell would cause the value to plummet. How would you take the cascading stream with you anyway?

Toys are always a good idea. Chess sets and action figures are almost cliché. Doll houses, stuffed animals, crystal figurines, toy chariots with horses, undersized instruments, puzzles and games can all be of vastly varying value based on intricacy and materials.

Ceremonial weapons and armor can look like things that a character would want to use but they are worse than average when it gets down to the dirty work of fighting.

I’ve used hundreds of books. For instance: Star map book – 16 full maps spanning 1/3 year. Stars are not named. Sun and moon rise are marked and set positions are marked and labeled with times.

Tools can also be very expensive and not necessarily useful to the adventurers. A jeweler’s set or a smithy’s anvil; fine carpenter’s chisels or stone splitting wedges; a simple garden trowel or a gilded plow; a copper kettle or a silver tea tray could all be found as treasure. In fact, I think I’ve used them all.

A fish tank can hold a fortune. Individual rare fish and/or ornaments in the tank could be arbitrarily valuable. Imagine the adventurers trying to keep the rare fish alive long enough to sell them to a collector.

Though I know I’m breaking the bling-bling train: livestock. I’ve had BBEGs with herds, flocks, coops, etc. full of salable livestock. While I’m off-topic a bit, hostages can also be fun. Many BBEGs take prisoners and their return can be worth a cash reward, or they can be ransomed, or they can be sold into slavery or any number of interesting things. Do the PCs charge the princess an “escort fee” to get her back to the palace? Does the king claim it was their duty an refuse to pay? What if she wasn’t a princess, but just lying so the PCs didn’t leave her there?




Small trinkets:

Ornate letter opener, made from rare metals or claws of rare animals.
Rare inques and quils.
Seal ring, bearing reiligion's symbol or familiy crest.
Magical watermark stylus, marks can only be seen with special eye gem (included in purchase).
Crystal monnocle, may have magical properties.
Finished or unfinished written play by BBEG, might aswell be a book, comic or elaborate study notes.
Crystal liquer bottles and flasks.
Entertainment illusion gems, create varius illusions of your desire for your entertainment.
Entertainment creation gems (Warning: any damage caused by gemstone is the fualt of its user), as above but the illusions are real but usualy not powerfull enough to be used for offensive purposes. (Can be used for very creative persuits for those who have a dirty mind ;) )




Why buy when you have artisan skills? So the BBEG has made his own Crystal ball Lavalamps-Immensly magical, purely for lowlight decor, and worth a fortune in art, but only to him and some depraved Halfling with mirrored ceilings and displacer-beast carpets.

"Oh dear gods the horror of it all!"

So where is that Collection of engraved beer barrels from around the world?

What about that Ship in a bottle? A specificly tuned crystal ball with little in the way of use beyond its constant surveilance of the Trader "Windslo Wench" as it sails from one port to the next.




Loot food from the pantry:

The pantry contains a few items of value, for example
- Superior ham: This ham comes from an especially tasty breed of black pigs that have been fattened on a diet of acorns. Not smocked but dry-cured for 4 years this delicacy is worth several gold-pieces per pound.
- Superior hard cheese: The milk for this cheese comes from cattle that feed on grass rich with herbs. The cheese matures up to 6 years.
- Truffles: These highly prized fungi come in black and white variants. They grow underground and are found with the help of pigs and dogs. They are easily worth their own weight in gold.
- Balsamic vinegar: Made from a reduction of cooked white Trebbiano grape juice and not a vinegar in the usual sense. It ages at least 12 years – the highest quality 25 years and more in successively smaller casks made from different kinds of wood.
- Old red wine: A few bottles of really old red wine – valuable!
- Fine brandy: Matured in an oak cask, now in a crystal bottle.
- Exotic spices – often worth their weight in gold…

Less valuable but still very tasty are other things, for example

- Octopus-salad marinated in olive-oil, lemon-juice and garlic
- Anchovies in a glass-jar
- Green and black olives, marinated in olive-oil and garlic
- Sundried tomatoes
- Pickled artichoke
- Salami: This sausage is made from horse and donkey flesh
- An amphora of the best olive-oil
- Fresh bread
- Dried pasta
- Fresh fruits, apples and grapes




Vell, here goes my ideas
Editors note: while not exactly art in the traditional sense, to each his own, and this list is qwite amusing

Glass versions of weapons (Collector's/Vanity items)

A very, dangerously, shiny silver piece.

A rather ragged, patched teddy bear (Not sure if said, but needed to be)

A skeleton in the closet

A skull which is used to put little things in (A point for knowing reference)

A table, nailed to the ceiling

Items nailed/magically added to said table on ceiling

A waste bin with several smashed up attempts at a love letter.

Very, very bad poetry

The BBG's Diary, with sketches, stick figure sketches

A bowl of food, three days old, several bowls.

Garbage under the bed.

A Jackalope Head

The skull of -insert family member, bonus points for first born's- on his desk/shrine.

Poorly (or well) drawn pictures of a local lady (Sorta Love Sick thing)

For the really evil: A "chainmail" suit made out of pixy skulls.

A Fan fiction, based off famous heroes or his/her favorite author. Bonus points if it's the heros (Mentioned before?)

For your "Good BBG"

A holy book with doodles of the local priest in between the lines

A bunch of pressed flowers

The Skull of a Higher Ranking Demon, made into a footstool

A rack in the dungeon, it has some flowers or other "cutsy" desgins on it.

The Broken relic (shield, sword, necklace, etc) of his/her Ancestor

Stories about the BGG being praised by his god.

A Gallon of "Holy Water" under the bed. (Think sterotypical Dwarves, if you've read any of the David and Leigh Eddings books think Alorns)

For your Really Evil, Final Boss:

A Sock Puppet

[Bullet06320]

This is what happens when you look though catalogs



Byzantine-era Constantinople had several famous teams of chariot racers, named for different colors: Blue, Red, Green, &c. The BBEG has a set of sweatshirts (or woolens or whatever is warm and comfy) in each color with the team name in Big Letters across the front.

In a lich's closet: T-shirt that says "Old Geezer"

A huge collection of National Geographic magazines (gives reader a Knowledge:geography or Knowledge: local customs check).

Child's Novelty Socks: 1 gp / pair. Each pair of socks has some animal silkscreened onto the ankle, facing out. Name of animal is written on soles of feet. Child can use visual cues to put own socks on straight. Cow, Lion, Elephant, Frog, Chick, Pig, others. Stretchy cloth supports Infant, Toddler, Youngster sizes. Special: 7 gp buys 8 pairs.

Instant Flower Garden: 4 gp buys you a 6 foot long roll of material, holds seeds (500+) for 20 kinds of flowers which bloom in different colors and at different times during the season. Most flowers also draw butterflies. Roll material breaks down naturally after a good rain.
Special Offer: roll can be filled with Venus Fly Traps, Carrion Orchids, Sundews, and similar plants that will tend to creep out unwanted guests. Extra fee.

Faux Marble Countertop: 5 gp/set. 20 tiles, each 5" square. Looks just like authentic marble, actually made of tin. Black or white. For the up-and-coming BBEG who yet must suffer the constraints of a budget. Or keep up appearances after pesky adventurerers trash the joint.

Garden Stakes: 5 gp for two. Hand-crafted, weather-resistant, made of stoneware, with message burnt onto front. 14"x4" overall. "Grow, d--- it", "This is your last chance - Bloom!", "Welcome to my garden", "I don't remember planting this", "I tried. It died.", "Don't just stand there ... Weed!"

Graduation Key Chain: 5 gp. Shaped like a diploma. Box to hold the chain and fob and keys is shaped like a graduate's cap. Box is decorated with tassel. This item increases in value and innate impressiveness as the local level of education decreases.

Sport drink bottle: 5 gp. Functions as a canteen. Decorated with a character from mythology, or perhaps a powerful political or religious leader. Spillproof sipper on top, small carry compartment on bottom for snacks.

Stained-Glass Window Ornaments: 5 gp. Ornate pewter design with stained glass centerpiece, dangling charms, acrylic jeweled beads, light airy look.

Sterling Silver Dangling Earrings: 5 gp / pair. Designs: sun and moon (3" long), heart (5" long), mathematical curve (2" long). Dramatic and forward-fashion gift for women.

Wedding Bubbles: 5 gp buys you 48 6-oz bottles full of soapy water and a bubble blower inside the lid. Normally available colored white but other shades available. Narrow ribbon tied around bottle (many colors available) also ties lid to base. Sealed watertight with wax.

Early Learning Books: 6 gp / set of 8. Children's classic stories, rhymes, characters. For the well-educated urbane family's child. 10-page board books, 4.5"x3". 4 sets available (Mother Goose, farm animals, wild animals, guildsmen).

Flash Cards: 6 gp / deck. One deck of 100 cards holds the basic math facts. Sets for Addition, Subtraction, Multiplication, Division. Bonus set has common runes, glyphs, &c. (Standard language is Draconic; others available upon request.)

Flashlight: 6 gp. Uses the chemicals that go in miners' helmets. Lasts for hours.

Max Liquidator: 6 gp. Pool toy squirts water up to 30 feet away. Submerge, pull out plunger to fill inner chamber with water, then shove back in to squirt water out nozzle end. Lightweight balsa wood construction - it floats! Hardwoods where needed for strength and durability. Neon colors: blue, green, red. 24"x3" diameter when empty. For extra surprises, can be modified to contain a minor water elemental (please contact us to determine additional surcharge).

Tin Lanterns: 6 gp. Place a candle inside, message carved into side lets light out. Messages include "Live, love, laugh", "dream", "wish", "friends". Can also be made to cast a glyph or sigil or rune on the wall. Wall-cast symbols are mirror images of those meant to be read directly.
A map room might be constructed with one of these lanterns on a post in the middle. A number of locations on the map can be lit (with candles mounted on the roof). When the lantern is also lit, it casts a pattern which covers all the candles except one - the true location.

Aromatic Candles: 7 gp. 3.5"x3.5" cylinder. Coffee scent shown, also offered in anything else that smells tasty or that you associate with relaxation.

Child's Book: 7 gp. 365 Stories and Rhymes for Boys/Girls. Utilizes favorite folk tales, folklore, mythos. Hardcover. Written in vernacular languages (a Common tongue) or in old uncommon languages for collectors and historians.

Garden Statue: 7 gp. Cold-cast ceramic with metal and rope accents, shaped like a frog lying in a hammock wearing hillbilly garb. Frog's facial expression and body language have 'comfortable and relaxed' written all over them. (Not literally.) 13"x11"x5". Other figures available to lie in hammock. Extra fee - for sculptor to visit - gains purchaser's likeness lying in hammock.

Hand-Painted Glass Candleholder: 7 gp. Tall glass candleholder with goblet-shaped upper half, top rim shaped like a flame. Bag of sand fills lower part of goblet and provides flat surface to place candle atop. Design painted on outside surface: seashells, roses, fireplace(strategically placed for effect). Others available.

Pair of Flip-Flops: 7 gp per His/Her pair. His are black with white accents; Hers are white with black accents. Soles formed so you impress "Just Married" into your footprints. Wedding rune printed on heel. Other symbols available for sole; inquiries welcomed.

Windchimes: 7 gp. 32"x4"x4". Four metal tubes and a metal weight hang beneath a ceramic base. Wind causes the weight and tubes to swing and strike each other, causing gentle notes. Smaller chimes have higher pitch and will stir in gentler breezes. Functional as an unobtrusive alarm to place near a lair entrance where there is supposed to be no breeze (for instance, in hallway behind a secret door).

Wooden Weaving Loom Set: 7 gp. Child's toy. Works just like Weaver's Guild equipment. 1000+ colored beads to put on threads. 4 colors of thread on spools. 4.5"x9" loom is wood, simplified version of professional equipment. Makes necklaces, bracelets, anklets, and more.

Beach Towels: 8 gp. 60"x30". Generous size, vivid colors, whimsical designs. School of dolphins in shallow water smiling and wearing colored sunglasses, school of different-colored clownfish (rainbow shades), frogs in "see no evil..." poses. Non-mundane animals also available for the magically-adept.

Frame (for paintings): 8 gp. 9"x11". Can be hung tallways or longways. Fine-looking woods.

Kitchen Apron: 9 gp. Because sometimes your significant female thinks she is higher-class than she really is; make yourself look like a hero who sympathizes with her, without having to actually do anything. Messages "Born to shop, forced to cook" or "My favorite thing to make for dinner is Reservations". Ties at back of waist, adjustable neck strap. Rugged and washable material. For an additional fee, can be magically treated to resist cooking stains, can also be enspelled to ignore Grease spells cast on the wearer.

Young & Trendy Tops: 9 gp. Blouse or tank top for women. Includes sewn-in support with ruffles. Spaghetti straps, babydoll, or on/off shoulder sleeve caps. Many colors available. Accessorize your bedroom elf.

Flower Planters: 10 gp. Designed to look and feel like a pair of laborer's blue jeans (or whtever farm laborers in your region wear) that stand up by themselves with nobody inside 'em. Flower pots can be mounted in waist. Realistic look and texture.

'I'm Learning' Activity Kits: 10 gp. These home-schooling kits (is there really any other form of effective schooling?) contain the 3R's for subject matter. ABCs, phonics, math (add, subtract, multiply, divide), handwriting. Writing kit includes a slate board and chalksticks. Please specify language for alphabet set. (Phonics kit may not be available for hieroglyphics-based written languages.) Knowledge and education pave the way to power.

Sequined Crocheted Handbag: 10 gp. Purse-sized. Bag is covered in snazzy round sequins. Small inner pockets for comb, makeup, coins, &c. Black, pink, multicolored, others available. Theft deterrent; too visible to casually carry away. Keep your lady's things handy during a night on the town.

Shower Curtain or Wallpaper Sheet: 10 gp each. Design shows an old outhouse. Curtain is made of canvas. Best placed in a lair equipped with hot-and-cold running water and sanitary facilities. Wallpaper includes glue and tools; curtain includes a rod and hooks with small version of the big scene painted on them.

T-shirt: 10 gp. Base color is hunter's green, with slogan in dust or gold "It's not about winning. It's about bringing home the trophy" below picture of many-pointed buck. Or "Vegetables are not food. Vegetables are what food eats."

Rolling Clothes Trolley: 11 gp. Removable hangars, wheels. Framework vehicle is 28"x26"x16". (tall enough to hold up pants and avoid wrinkles). Small knobs on bar spaces the hangars to avoid overcrowding, crushing, or wrinkling. Holds 18 pairs of pants or neckties.

Lounge Pants: 13 gp. Cotton, decorated with the name and logo of a premium liqueur, Drawstring waist. For men.

Traveling Chair: 13 gp. Backpack-sized when folded, forms back and seat when opened. Mesh bottle holder (canteen-sized) on side, bigger pocket on back to carry programs, sandwiches, &c. Carry straps, easy-to-clean surfaces. Drink holder also accepts the Sports Bottle listed above.

Stoneware Mixing Bowl Set: 14 gp. Different sizes nest together to save storage space. Five pieces. Smallest holds 20 oz; largest holds 114 oz.

Instant Garden Mat: 15 gp. Covers 10 foot by 10 foot space, holds 2000+ mixed flower seeds as our Instant Flower Garden above. Can be easily cut to fit smaller or odd-shaped spaces. Get lots of beautiful flowers without doing any dirty work!

Decorative Breadbox: 16 gp. Made of wood, pull-down lid on front. Painting on front shows a step in the bread-making process (seeds, sheaf of wheat, mill, oven). Other sides are painted white or light brown. Big enough to hold two loaves of bread.

Ladies Plus-Size Chemise and Robe: 17 gp / set. Chemise has satin ribbon trim, spaghetti straps, printed floral pattern, V-neck, delicate white lace along neckline. Robe has long sleeves, tie belt. Both break above the knees. Available in pink or blue (chemise is white with colored print). Add a romantic touch to your bigger-girl bedroom elf.

Coin Bank: 20 gp. Clear tube (plastic or glass) with slot on top and screw-off base. Handy place to store pocket change (cp, sp). Includes a small device in top that plays a few bars of music, flashes lights, rings bell, blows whistles, or whatever, when coin is dropped in.
The advertisment example is a railroad crossing gatepost.

Hand-Quilted Throws: 20 gp. 50"x60". Each quilt panel about 10" square, decorative trim designs in between. Hand-made, imported (no mention from where). Wide selection of designs for major and minor quilt panels to choose from.

Wicker storage basket: 20 gp for set of 5. 21"x17"x9". Interior detachable water-resistant liner.

Armories: 25 gp per item. Storage containers made of pine or oak, and other woods on trim. Clean, simple lines and natural look allow these items to blend into any decor. Some assembly required; hardware and easy instructions included. Bench 32"x18"x16". Cube 20"x20"x20". Craftsmen near you can convert the bench into the seat of a sofa, or the cube into a chair.

Drapery Panel window art: 25 gp. 36"x84" curtain is wrinkle-resistant, offers illusion of doorway outside to an English Garden or a Bamboo Beach. Designed to hold illusion spells to enhance the effect.

Poker Night Tabletop Collection: 25 gp. All items decorated with small images if the 13 cards in their suit along the rims and big symbol (heart, diamond, club, spade) in center. May be bought in easily-affordable parts.
Stoneware plates and mugs (6gp/4).
Ceramic bowls (3gp/4)
Polyester/cotton placemats (9gp/4)
Runner 72"x13" (9gp). Decorated with complete deck of 52 cards displayed.
Poker table not included.

Lit palm trees: 30 gp. 6' tall tree. Actually carved-wood trunk but artificial leaves. Many unobtrusive candle holders, one in each joint. Shorter 4" tree for only 25 gp.
Light spell can be cast on joint to look like candles, if fire is a problem in your area.

Kitchen Collection: 60 gp for set (2 windows, 4 chairs, tablecloth). Matching prints for kitchen furniture. Please provide the dimensions of your tabletop or window with order. Can also be purchased seperately.
Window curtains / valance are edged in bows. 10gp.
Chair pad has ruffled edges. 7gp.
Tablecloth comes in square, round, or rectangular. 13gp.

Bedroom Set: 200gp. Solid colors or designs, usually floral. Can be purchased in pieces to customize your room.
Undersheet, oversheet, blanket, comforter, quilt. 35gp per piece.
Curtain. 10gp per panel Thick enough to conceal wall panels if needed.
Spells cost extra. Sleep, keep warm on cold night, excessive masculinity (as Viagra but no worry of heart attack), darkness (on curtain) to sleep in after sunrise, Summon: Bedroon Elf.

Everfull Cup of Fine Liqueur: Price depends on liqueur desired. Offer this goblet to any important personage whom you wish to impress now and ask a favor of later.

Everfull Cup of Nasty Grog: Price based on quantity of grog requested. Serve this goblet to unwanted house guests. One customer reports that it can be spilled to make a trail that even bloodhounds will not follow.

A Basket of Everlasting Provisions can be pimped out a bit. After applying a Divine Sigil of Approval, it will do any of the following (depending on the divinity and its dietary requirements):

- offers only Fish on Fridays
- all meals are guaranteed kosher
- traditional foods on holidays (turkey/Thanksgiving)
- extra-kosher food for Passover week
- produces foods eaten by the Chosen People during the age of legends (milk and honey?)
- special foods for festivals (green beer/St Patricks Day)
- go on a fast for 40 days: get a lot of bread & water, not much condiments or sauces
- the Basket knows when there is a famine in the land and produces enough to share ... as long as you DO
- 1/year, enough to feed 5000 plus leave crumbs and scraps, all of which magically disappear overnight
- any water in the Basket is also Holy Water
- gives you cold (as in refrigerated) foods
- if you leave the Basket in the sun, it acts like a stove
- bread in the Basket is already consecrated for eating by High Priests &c
- one martini, shaken not stirred

Aches and Pains
We have all heard about would-be Evil Overlords who made foolish, self-destructive decisions because they were suffering from some sort of bile or gout or other pains. Now you don’t have to stumble into their errors. With our medicine chest fillers and health-promoting equipment, you can live pain-free and be of much sounder mind and body. Surpass all your rivals because you are in good health, with our help.

Planar Fascitis Splint
Put On to End Foot and Heel Pain, Relieve pain for greater comfort. This night splint gently pulls foot into place as you sleep. Adjustable for perfect fit. Wear on left or right foot. BONUS – free arch support included. 13 GP each

Gel Toe Spreaders, Takes Care of Toe Troubles
Simply place our clear toe spreaders between your toes to eliminate overlapping and promote joint alignment. Great for hammered or bent toes. Can be worn under any footwear. Invisible under stockings. Pads for bunions /corns / &c can be placed along side. 10 GP for set of 4 (takes care of 1 foot)

Arch Brace
Instant Relief from Foot Pain
Our brace reduces inflammation, supporting and lifting so you can walk comfortably. Curved to fit, attached securely with adjustable Velcro. Can be worn under socks / stockings. Specify Man / Woman / Large (size 9+). 15 GP each; 28 GP for 2

Bio-Oil
Improve Uneven Skin Tone, Scars, Even Stretch Marks
Bio-Oil smoothes and tones aging, sagging, wrinkled, or injured skin on the face and body. Contains ingredients (vitamin A & E, lavender, rosemary, and our trademarked formulae) that help replenish skin’s natural oils. Suitable for all skin types. Non-greasy, hypoallergenic. Apply daily or use as bath oil. 4 fl oz.
25 GP bottle – SALE 22 GP

Natural Cough Syrup
Finally, ingredients you can pronounce! No drug interactions to worry about, either. Great-tasting syrup begins with anti-oxidant-rich buckwheat honey. Cinnamon, sea salt & lemon added. Relieve coughs and congestion with this non-drowsy side-effect-free formula. 4 fl oz. 15 GP jar – SALE 10 GP

Eczema Ointment
End Eczema Naturally
Say “so long” to persistent redness, flaking, dryness, and irritation. Ultra-soothing maximum strength formula penetrates deeply and works quickly. Natural emoluments moisturize while anti-inflammatory and anti-microbial tea tree & jojobe oil control irritation and reduce future outbreaks. 2.6 fl oz 27 GP bottle – SALE 23 GP

Gel Cushion
Sit Without Pain
Thick 3” foam gel inner layer and cut-out design distribute weight evenly, reducing pressure point and coccyx pain so you can sit for hours. Includes zip-off washable fleece cover. Specify coccyx or hemorrhoids. 45 GP each – SALE 40 GP
For an extra charge we can tailor your Gel Cushion to appear to be an integral part of even your gold-plated throne. Will size and shape to fit furniture and you.

Adjustable Foot Rest
Reduce Back Pressure & Stimulate Circulation
Massage your boot-free feet on the raised plastic fingers for greater relaxation. Ideal to use beneath a desk or in front of a comfy chair. Once you try it, you’ll wonder how you ever got along without one. Durable construction. 19 GP each

Reach-It
Reach Out, High, or Low
No more bending or straining. This is the extra helping hand you need to reach up, down, and all around. Grab hard-to-get items, large or small, up to 26” away, including things you’d rather not touch. (Such as holy symbols?) Magnetic edge picks up screws, paper clips, &c. Hand trigger is easy to squeeze. Rotating hand adjusts to object.
30 GP each

Roll-About Chair
Take the Pressure off Your Back, Legs, and Feet
Oversized padded seat accommodates 90% of your weight for fatigue-relieving support. Adjustable up to 36” high. Caster wheels won’t scratch floors & roll easily over carpeted or hardwood surface. Made of sturdy steel; 250 lbs capacity. 60 GP each – SALE 50 GP

“Plausible Deniability” torture equipment
Information is the greatest treasure, but not everybody will offer it to you at a fair price. We all know we need equipment to encourage the sharing, but nobody actually wants to talk about it. Who wants to advertise for pesky paladins to come in and try to “right” the “wrongs” they find in your lair? Everything on this page has a perfectly legitimate use that nobody at all can object to, yet just so happens to be useful for … alternate … purposes.

Back Scrubber
Easily Wash Your Back
Made of a unique mesh cloth that deep cleans and exfoliates at the same time, removing dead skin as it revitalizes and rejuvenates. Skin will feel softer and refreshed immediately. Prepare (or surprise) recalcitrant informants; see enclosed user’s manual. Not recommended for undead. Other non-living use with caution. 12 GP each

Neck Air Cushion
Say Goodbye to Stress and Stiff Neck
Portable rubber air cushion provides relief from neck, head, and shoulder discomfort. Squeeze the pump to gently stretch neck muscles. Get the kinks out after a poor night’s sleep, to improve posture, or while seated. 30 GP each
Easy conversion kit allows this to be put on back-to-front. 5 GP

Ultrabreathe
Even Mountain Climbers Could Breathe Better!
Planning to move someplace inaccessible or with bad air? Reduce your shortness of breath, breathlessness, improve lung performance by giving lungs a workout, no gym needed! Just inhale for a few minutes twice a day. As you inhale, resistance makes respiratory muscles work harder and become stronger. Can be fitted to facemask to prevent “cheating”. 47 GP each
Coming Soon: Adjustable version to prepare for very extreme environments.

Long Tweezers
Dig Deeper with Long Tongs
Retrieve hard-to-reach items in tall jars, disposals, or drains. These oversized long tweezers are food-safe, easy-to-grip, and washable. Stainless steel, 10” long
12 GP each

Cera Sharp Knife
This Knife Stays Sharp for Life
One ceramic Cera Sharp™ replaces a drawer full of metal kitchen knives. Ultra sharp long-life blade won’t rust or peel, cutting through meat, bread, and more with precision and ease. Non-stick surface so foods don’t cling while chopping. Fruits & veggies won’t oxidize & turn brown as fast wither. Order now and receive FREE ceramic potato peeler. Specially imported from Athas. 20 GP each
Special Offer: We are in negotiations to provide items of personal protection under the Cera Sharp™ brand. Place your pre-orders now!

Bad Air Sponge
Get Rid of Odors
Unlike perfumed sprays, this patented product neutralizes & eliminates smoke smells, pet / urine / mildew odors, cemetery scents, and much more – safely and continuously. Well-placed on a shelf in hallway leading from room containing source of odors; keep rest of lair fresh. Works in areas up to 400 sq ft for up to 120 days. All-natural and non-toxic. 15 GP each

I’m rich & comfy and have only the best
The huddled masses might find life tolerable in their natural condition of dirt and fleas, but you shouldn’t have to suffer such indignities. Our goods will allow you to live the high life. Many items specially chosen for those who yet must operate under the constraints of a budget. Save money now so you can eventually get rich enough to afford the expensive stuff those fat-cat fools bought – but you have the luxury of time to shop for a better bargain.

Split Screen Door
Let Air In & Keep Bugs Out
Enjoy fresh air without having to suffer bites from pesky bees, flies, or mosquitoes. Installs in any doorway in minutes, without tools. Come and go easily through the lightweight mesh screen. Weighted bottom.
13 GP narrow doorway
17 GP wide doorway

Table Cover
Give Your Table the Look of Granite
Protect and transform your folding table or picnic table. Elasticized cover fits tight and smooth like a new surface. Wipe clean with sponge. Comes in your choice of Grey, Tan, or Green. Sorry we cannot make the table as heavy as it looks.
15 GP short table
17 GP long table

Designer Mosaic Table Cover
Instant Table Makeovers
Add some artistic sophistication to your lair. They look so real, guests will swear they’re genuine. Add charm to any round, square, or multi-sided table up to 48”. Elasticized for perfect fit. Washable no-slip vinyl with fabric backing. Specify: Tuscan, Inlay, Vesuvius Stone, Stained Glass, Byzantine
19 GP each

Fine Wood Table Cover
Always a Perfect Fit
Our covers offer a snug fit, wrinkle-free, easily washable, no overhang. Transform your aged, drab, or hero-damaged table with a gorgeous fits-like-a-dream table cover. Use indoors or out. Fits on round, square, or multi-sided table up to 48” across. Specify: Maple, Cherry, Walnut, Oak
20 GP each

NEW – Vegas Poker cover for high-rolling gamblers. Can double as a table pad under linens, then take away the dinner ware and let the games begin.

Marbleized Table Covers
That big old table might have looked like firewood bait after you finally wrested it from its previous owner, but you can persuade everybody that it is brand new and top-quality. Specify: Marble Brown, Jade Marble, Tan Basket-weave, Marble Grey
Round (up to 48” ) 15 GP each
Oval (up to 72” ) 20 GP
Rectangle (up to 48” x 68” ) 20 GP each

Leather CPR
Protect and Restore Suppleness to Leather
Our cleaner and conditioner safely buffs away stains, scuffs, scratches, and smudges. Non-greasy, petroleum-free. If not for you (because you wear metal armor) also useful to make your less-equipped minions look good.
32 GP for 2 tubes

Leather Repair Kit
Make Repairs in Minutes
If Leather CPR (see above) is not enough, this ought to do the trick! Our Leather Repair Kit has everything you need to repair holes, rips, tears, cuts, and burns on furniture, luggage, seats, body armor, and more. FREE – Fabric Repair Kit – also usable on Cloth Armor - included.
20 GP each

Bedside Bell
No Tiny Buttons to Push
Want something? This traditional bell is the original intercom! Clear ring can be distinctly heard in next room or up/down stairs. Also makes a charming way to admit visitors to your presence. Silver-plated brass with easy grip wooden handle. 4½” x 2¼”. Several tones available for the musically-adept; get your ear’s perfect pitch.
13 GP each

Berber Carpet Tiles
Peel & Stick Carpet Tiles
Simply peel and stick these 12” x 12” tiles in your dungeon, bedroom, or passageways for a fresh new look. Less expense but as good-looking (and soft to feet) as full carpets. Tiles can be custom-cut for perfect fit. Indoor use. Stain and fade resistant. Comes in Grey, Beige, or Blue. 10 tiles per set.
18 GP per set; 32 GP for 2 sets

Carpet Rake
Raise Carpet Nap, Ground-In Dirt, Pet Hair
You can vacuum away years of debris and begin enjoying better-looking carpets and rugs in any room. Make carpets look new without having to replace them. Flexible teeth reach between carpet fibers.
28 GP each

Wood Floor Cleaner
Restore the Finish Without Leaving an Oily or Dull Residue
Our exclusive formula works on all sealed wood, bamboo, and laminate floors. No harsh chemicals, fresh citrus scent, safe to use around kids and pets if necessary. Each bottle 32 fl oz.
15 GP each

Wool Floor Duster
Naturally Attracts & Holds Dust
Our dusters easily reach into corners, under furniture, and along baseboards. The natural lanolin in wool combines with static electricity to create a natural “dust magnet”. Won’t scratch furniture, gets better every time you have it washed. 12” wide.
33 GP each
SPECIAL: We can gear multiple dusters into a trap for unwanted heroes. Send inquiry with your order. Extra charge (pardon the pun) may apply.

Stair Treads
No-Slip Oriental Designs
Latex-backed treads transform the look of a room, while adding safety, style, and comfort. Easy to clean in place or remove to wash. Can be tacked, nailed, or stapled in place. Available in Burgundy, Ivory, or Blue.
24 GP for set of 8

This Just In: Very-slip stair treads to trip up unwanted Heroic visitors. Mount these at the top of staircase and let them all fall down. Designs look like treads above.
13 GP for set of 4

Monogram Door Mat
Keep Dirt & Debris Outside
This personalized door mat makes a statement. Rugged flat weave withstands the weather and foot traffic. Rubber-backed for slip-free stability. 18” x 30”. Specify one-character monogram. Letters, cuneiform, hieroglyphics, runes all available (sorry, purchaser must place any desired enchantments). Ships direct from factory.
50 GP value for only 20 GP each

Odor Assassin
Approved for use in any room. One spray cleans out smoke, pet, kitchen, fish, mildew and other offensive odors. Also good to remove trouble-causing tell-tale scents before nosy officials arrive to inspect your premises. Leaves faint pleasant citrus smell. Keeps rooms fresh for hours. 8 oz non-aerosol can. Specify Orange, Lemon-Lime, or Tropical scent.
13 GP each; 20 GP for 2 cans

Cane
Fashionable Aid for Him or Her
Sturdy support for villains on the go. Durable construction supports up to 300 lbs. Adjustable height around base of 3 ft. Easy-grip wooden handle, rubber tip. Specify: Bronze or Floral.
35 GP each; 65 GP for pair

Cane Buddy
Keep Your Cane Upright and Within Reach
No need to bend down to pick your cane up off the floor. Clever holder mounts on your cane and holds it securely in place with a suction cup. Works on tables, counters, even tablecloths! Use with all our canes. Fits beneath handle.
10 GP for set of 2

Spill-Guard Cushion
Spills Roll Right Off!
These cushions are protected with our special alchemical Spill-Guard ™ water and oil repellent. Liquid spills quickly bead up and roll off, so accidents aren’t a problem. Slip-resistant bottom keeps each cushion in place for comfy slide-free seating. No tie-downs needed. Comes in Barn Red, Sage, Tan, or Navy.
Spill-Guard ™ Pad 18 GP each; 32 GP for 2; 60 GP for 4
Spill-Guard ™ Cushion 20 GP each; 36 GP for 2; 64 GP for 4

Breaking News! Live-action test during hurricane shows this product really works!

Alarm Security Bar
Secure Your Lair Against Break-Ins
Add instant security without any time- and labor-consuming installation or costly monitoring. Alarm sounds when the door knob is turned or door is pushed. Choose from among: loud siren, barking dog, dragon roar, gang of orcs. Made from heavy gauge steel. Adjustable length. Requires battery (sold separately).
30 GP each; 4 GP per 9V battery

Are you a little short of coin? Our Standard Security Bar makes no sounds and needs no batteries. You can always upgrade when your fortunes rise again – and move this bar to a secret door you’d rather not advertise.
20 GP each

Magnetic Curtain Rod
Dress Up Any Door
This rod attaches to a metal-banded door quickly with two powerful magnets. Installs in seconds, without tools or drilling. Strong enough to hold most curtains, from canvas to cotton to sheer. Also comes with double-sided tape for wood-only doors. (Tape is less strong than magnets; caveat emptor.) Adjusts to width of door.
25 GP each – SALE 20 GP

Full-Page Magnifier
This full page-sized magnifier makes reading small print easy. Sized for typical spell books, it’s great for reading news broadsides, take-out menus, unknown arcane scrolls, and the small print in devils’ contracts. Slim and sturdy enough to take anywhere. Several can be stacked for extra magnification.
10 GP set of 2

Gold Dip
Create 24k Luster
Our salesmen enthuse: even dwarves can’t tell if this has been used on an item! Plating solution permanently bonds 24k gold on most metals and is safe for all stones. Dip & buff to add luster. Will not chip, peel, or flake. Safe & non-toxic. Includes 3.4 fl oz of solution and activator disc.
25 GP can
Special: with separate inquiry, we can prepare a bulk shipment; be prepared if the Natives offer you an opportunity to purchase Manhattan Island.

Deluxe Liquid Silver
Restore & Replate Your Silverware
100% pure silver bonds instantly to base metal. Special non-toxic solution cleans & silver-plates, restoring luster. Won’t harm expensive hirelings should they accidentally drop or inhale some (but drinking some is another story). Transform brass, copper, nickel, or worn silver plate into beautiful like-new treasures. Silver will not chip, crack, flake, or peel. Includes 4 oz liquid silver, sponge, gloves, and buffing cloth. Original batch tested by dwarven craftsmen and approved.
20 GP each

Brass Restorer
Made by the manufacturer of Liquid Silver (see above), performs the same function for brass items. 6.8 oz jar
17 GP each

Glass Restorer
Be amazed at like-new shine and sparkle. Non-caustic, non-toxic, environmentally safe (as if you care). From the Liquid Silver people (see above). 1 lb jar
20 GP each; 37 GP for 2 jars

Streakless Glass Cleaner
Make the dirtiest glass sparkling clean with the least amount of effort. Unique pleasant-smelling formula won’t smear, haze, or leave a film. Can even be used in direct sunlight with fantastic results. Previously available only to professional cleaners. Safe on any type of glass – or even paint. 19 fl oz
16 GP for 2 bottles

Special reduced rates for temples and other deific monuments – inquire separately.

Tint-A-Window
Reduces Sun Glare
If the previous product is anathema to you, then try this: Be protected from the harsh glare of the sun. Easy to apply; just trim to fit and press in place. Static cling does the rest. Removable and reusable. Apply to inside and/or outside of window. 36” x 6 ½’ roll. Available in Grey or Privacy Black.
37 GP per roll

Silver Cloth
Create Your Own Silverware Drawer
All you need is a drawer, glue, and some of our famous Silver Cloth. Eliminate the tarnish from your sterling. Holidays become easier when you don’t have to worry about the “condition” of your sterling silver pieces. Cloth is 58” wide
18 GP per yard

Mighty Grip
Finish Struggling with Jar Lids
We let you easily open any size jar with ease. Perfect for jelly, condiments, pickle bottles, and more
9 GP each

Water Pump
Dispense water at the touch of a button. This cost-saving pump holds one container so you can keep your 5 or 6 gallon jug wherever you find convenient. Uses the same mechanisms as our Famous Cuckoo Clock. Gnomish manufacture with weights, springs, and pulleys. No spills, lifting, or need for a stand.
17 GP each

In-Home Special: We can adapt and enlarge this device to provide you with running water in your own lair. Requires pre-existing cistern of adequate capacity (which you already have if you are prepared to endure a siege). May require extensive renovations to existing structures. Price is not for the faint of heart or light of purse.

Rolling Cart
This Cart Climbs Stairs
Our rolling cart has triangle-shaped specially-mounted wheels that easily maneuver up man-sized steps and curbs. Great for transporting equipment over terraced landscapes (such as cities built on hillsides). Some assembly required. Basket is big enough to hold two stuffed-full backpacks.
65 GP each

Cookie Sheet Cleaner
Keep Baking Pans Looking Like New
Despite the temptation, you can’t just give a stained or burnt pan to the oytugh in your garbage pit for it to clean up. (Not if you intend to use the pan for any meals later.) Instead, try our Cleaner, which uses the same formula as bakeries to remove stains and grease. Non-corrosive, biodegradable (so you can still feed the slop to your oytugh when you’re done). 8 fl oz bottle
13 GP each; 24 GP for 2

Whistling Tea Kettle
Boil water for two or a crowd. Alerts you with a can’t-miss-hearing high-pitched whistle. Glass panel in kettle lets you easily gauge water level (holds up to 12 cups). Heat-resistant glass, stay-cool handle, push button to open spout, flip-top lid allows for safe fast drip-less pouring.
15 GP each

Fire X
Put out common household fires. Spray nozzle design makes fighting fires simple. No need to shake can – just pull off tab and spray. Lighter to hold than traditional fire extinguishers, effective even against magically-induced flame (just in case), environmentally safe. Non-toxic biodegradable foam for easy clean-up afterwards.
20 GP each; 36 GP for 2

Blackout Drapes
Black out unwanted light, reduce noise. 54” x 80” panels can be trimmed to size. Can be attached to existing curtains if desired. Masterwork quality to allow arcane enhancement if desired.
35 GP each – SALE 17 GP

No-Moth
Kill moths and their larvae before they infest your best clothes and ruin your investment. Place a moth cake in the vented metal container and hang.
11 GP each; 10 GP for pack of 4 refills

“Plausible Deniability” torture equipment
Information is the greatest treasure, but not everybody will offer it to you at a fair price. We all know we need equipment to encourage folks to share, but nobody actually wants to talk about it. Who wants to advertise for pesky paladins to come in and try to “right” the “wrongs” they find in your lair? Everything in this section has a perfectly legitimate use that nobody at all can object to, yet just so happens to be useful for … alternate … purposes.

Armed Gardener
Tough sleeve allows you to ignore rose thorns &c as you prune. Not quite Leather Armor.
17 GP / pair

Thornguard Glove
As above plus hand guard.
22 GP /pair

Garden Hands
Think of Wolverine with a rake instead of claws. Customizable tines in the event you must send agents out of the garden to do your bidding. (Uses rules for Wrist Razors from Athas.)
17 GP

Leather CPR
Lanolin-infused lotion removes stains, scuffs, scratches, smudges from leather. Not for suede. Will even enhance the appearance of your undead servitors. Effects on living left to your imagination – or experiment.
9 GP for 12oz squeeze bottle

Odor Neutralizer
32oz spray bottle removes unwanted odors. Last chance to purchase this unique formulation.
11 GP normally – on SALE 9 GP each

Bad Air Sponge
Your first chance to experience what will replace the above product line. Unlike perfumed sprays, this product neutralizes and eliminates smoke, urine / pet / mildew odors, and more – safely, quickly, and continuously. Treat a 400 sq. ft. room for 120 days.
13 GP each or 2 / 24 GP

Pour-N-Restore
Our miracle product combines a degreaser with an absorbant. Goes on as a liquid, dries into powder as spill is absorbed. No rinse, no mess! Works on concrete, stone, or masonry. Stains old or new, any hydrocarbon or biochemical, will disappear.
20 GP or 2 / 36 GP

Aerator Sandals
Every step you take allows air, water, fertilizer to reach lawn root zone. 26 spikes, 1¾” long, per sole.
15 GP

I’m rich & comfy and have only the best

The huddled masses might find life tolerable in their natural condition of dirt and fleas, but you shouldn’t have to suffer such indignities. Our goods will allow you to live the high life. Many items specially chosen for those who yet must operate under the constraints of a budget. Save money now so you can eventually get rich enough to afford the expensive stuff those fat-cat fools bought – but you have the luxury of time to shop for a better bargain.

Cool Crystals
Several of these crystals come sewn into an ordinary-looking headband. Soak in cool water before wearing. Good for working near forges or flame elementals in their natural(?) habitats.
13 GP

Arborvitae Tree
This is an artificial plant. 48” high, looks like a bush. Add beauty and elegance to a room. Or conceal a trap where nobody would expect.
110 GP

Windowed Birdhouse
2-way mirror mounted on back of common birdhouse so your observations do not disturb the birds.
20 GP

Special offer – we are looking for clients who will put other eggs in the birdhouse and keep logs of their observations. Phoenix, griffon, others. XL birdhouse included for creatures with XL eggs. Rates available upon interested request.

Snake-a-way
Repel poisonous or non-poisonous shakes. Rain-resistant and environment-friendly. Don’t use tell-tale magical zones! (Adherents of Zehir may not react well to discovery of this product in your possession or the use of it; fair warning.)
27 GP for 4 lb bag

Manual Mower
Make any noble’s lawn look good by application of manicure efforts. Handle tough turf with ease. 16” wide cutting path. Weighs 22 lbs, including 6.6-gal capacity canvas clipping holder. Requires one servant-power pusher.
Price subject to negotiation; we are offering a franchise opportunity rather than a piece of equipment

Grass Roll
This biodegradable mat contains grass seeds to start a lawn. Variants available: shaded ground, sunny ground, Southern /subtropical, permashort, heavy traffic areas, swampy soil, sandy soil, dry / hot weather
28 GP / 25 sq. ft.; 90 GP / 100 sq. ft.

Rain Barrel
Innocuous equipment to prepare for future siege or drought. 50 gallon capacity. Discharge valve at bottom connects to common hose and pipe fittings (send sample with your order).
60 GP

Large Print Thermometer
We can print these in any temperature scale or lettering system desired. 13” diameter. Set several along accessway to warn intruders of their likely doom.
15 GP

Lighted Power Cap
Two crystals with Continual Light cast on them set under the brim of a baseball cap. Light your own path but not those who pursue you. 42 ft. range. Can refit crystals into any style hat/cap with an overhanging brim.
18 GP each or 2 / 34 GP

Entry Mats
Remove moisture and dirt from boots / shoes. Colors: camel, dark brown, charcoal, medium blue, red. 2’x3’ or 3’x5’ sizes. No more dirt, debris, or water tracked through your lair.
45 GP for small size; 95 GP for large

Retractable Clothesline
40 feet long. Besides the obvious use, mount somewhere you need an inconspicuous tripwire. “That isn’t REALLY a trap.”
20 GP

Window Bar
Strong adjustable-length steel tubing easy to mount in window to prevent unwanted access. Can be set between 17” – 29” long.
15 GP

Outdoor Hat
Rain-resistant fabric, wide sunblocking brim, dark undersurface fights glare, terrycloth sweatband liner, adjustable chin strap. (For an extra fee, we can enchant this hat so vampires can go outside during daytime.)
23 GP for basic model

Weatherproof Padlocks
Comes in set of 2, each with 3 keys. Dwarven and Gnomish craftsmanship to create a pair of sturdy locks with the highest quality.
16 GP / pair

Picnic Table Covers
Comfortable, nice looks, easy-to-clean, no splinters. Flannel lining under vinyl or canvas top. Table cover is 64”x33”; two seat covers 64”x16”. Picnic table not included.
20 GP for the set

Quick-Dry Flood Barrier
Absorbent powder within turns into heavy waterproof gel when wet. Stack several to create a retaining wall. Each Barrier tube is 5 feet long. Compact and lightweight when dry; naturally decomposes after use. Chemicals within recommended for fresh water use only.
35 GP each; 2 / 60 GP

Max-Trax Spray Can
One 8oz can covers 10 sq. ft. with an anti-slip coating. Prevent falls and spills. Glows in the dark!
13 GP

Garage Door Screen
This 16’x7’ screen lets fresh air in but keeps pests out. Magnetic center strip allows ingress / egress. Framing also available for placement across urban roadway. High-quality craftsmanship suitable for later placement of spells.
50 GP

Extra-Long Entry Mat
Place this in front of the above doorway. 5’x2’.
45 GP each; 2 / 80 GP

Fresh Drop
Creates a blocking layer on water surface to eliminate odors before they can escape into the air. Concentrated plant extract formula. 20oz bottle.
2 / 14 GP

Solar Color-Changing Wind Chime
Hang this in a sunny place. After sunset, 100,000 hour light progresses through rainbow colors (1 per 3 seconds); light creates star-like patterns on walls and floors. 5 aluminum chimes hang from canopy, producing gentle cascade of tones in the breeze. Solar panel on canopy, light protected by tough not-glass cover. 22” high and 8” diameter.
45 GP

Blade Sharpener
This tool kit can handle anything the size of a scissors or hoe or shovel.
15 GP

[DrMotives]

I gave out a solid gold feinting couch once, because it was in the adventure module I was running (Tomb of Horrors). The PCs made sure to not only take the couch, but it inspired them to make their own ToH style dungeon. They put the couch in the first room, which was of course the lobby. They had an undead minion stationed at a receptionist desk, who would greet anybody who came in and told them to make an appointment in the big book on the desk, and that they could wait on the solid gold couch until the PCs were read to see them.

[Bullet06320]

here is a great list

priced by Sanctaphrax

An iron ring set with a moonstone. (130gp)

A gold necklace containing a ruby, an emerald, and a sapphire. (3000gp)

An elegant tapestry depicting an ancient battle between Dwarves and Goblins. (900gp)

A suit of black plate armor, trimmed with gold and set with dozens of citrine gems. (1800gp)

A small sculpture of a knight made from obsidian. (300gp)

A small sculpture of a nature deity done in jade with multiple shades of green running in bands through it. (450gp)

A helm with an engraving of a hawk, talons and wings spread on the skull facing the enemy. (250gp)

Ornamental jade brigandine armor, made to protect the wearers soul in the after life. (We already have something like this for 10 000gp)

A pair of very comfortable, worn but not worn out, leather boots. (5gp)

A set of tableware (12 servings) made of a strange, very light metal, light steel but lighter for the same strength, known only by alchemists as a difficult to refine metal--aluminum. (1100gp)

A wooden mug, carved in the shape of a dragon, it's breath and head forming the handle. (20gp)

A painting of a series of legendary and monumental tombs built thousands of years ago, it's true location lost to time. (700gp)

A bronze sculpture, 3' high, depicting a giant standing over a harbor holding a lamp. (1600gp)

An ancient text in scroll form, entitled "The Lighthouse", dedicated to the god of knowledge and learning, describing a massive lighthouse (a metaphor for the deity) and the beneficial effects it has a fictional kingdom. (650gp)

An unassuming horn, actually used in ancient religious rituals to call the faithful to service. (1000gp)

A map leading to a famous mausoleum, allegedly built by a great king. (2800gp)

A broad hat, plain and functional. Wide enough to keep off the sun, sturdy enough to keep off rain. (2sp)

A strange thing--a tiny model of a ship, inside a glass bottle! (120gp)

A symbol of a deity, gilt, and set with gems of various colors. (500gp)

Attrinette Squirrel: A squirrel made of silver, and inlaid with an intricate pattern of gems, one of approximately 60 commissioned during the reign of Dorian III from a single craftsman, Attrinette. Any single example made by the craftsman himself is highly valued (think fabrige egg)(1500gp)

Glass Beads: Colored glass beads, highly valued, but more so in some cultures than others. (50gp)

Ivory Elephant: Jokingly given when the slight of a living white elephant is expected. (A white elephant is a creature too rare and valuable to be used for any pratical purpose, but which still must be fed and cared for) (400gp)

Gold Fillings: Gold lumps that can be pulled from the teeth of skeletons (1gp)

Silk Tunic: Enchanted, but anyone who can identify the enchantment will see that it is enchanted to not decay. That is all. (850gp)

The Secrets of the Drunken Monks: Ancient texts that reveal brewing recipes not produced for several hundred years: a brewing company would likely pay well to add a blend with this kind of appeal to their selection. (2000gp)

Lead Figures: Tiny painted toy soldiers and monsters, once very popular with children. (5gp/set)

Officer's Insignia: Pulled from the decaying lapels draped over skeletons, these medals are valuable as scrap, or as collectibles to the right collector. (30gp)

Map: Why just give your players a map, when they can find one, and find one old enough to be a bit inaccurate? (70gp)

Seashell Combs: A set of combs made of seashells. A variant version can have ivory or gemstones in the handle. (190gp)

Silverware: A set made of sterling silver and inlaid with semi-precious gems: (jade, ivory, pearl, turquiose, etc.)(200gp)

Cask of Rum: Aged 250 years, sell or enjoy.(75gp)

Pot-bellied stove: Could be incredibly hard to carry out of the dungeon, but hey, free stove.(40gp)

Bracelet of St. Cuthbert: A metal plate that lays flat on the wrist, and is held with a thick chain. The plate is inscribed with a small picture of St. Cuthbert and the text: "zeal - honesty - truth - discipline"(25gp)

Pinehead: A large-nosed, wooden puppet of a little boy in suspenders.(1gp)

Inking Wood Block: A wood block that when inked and pressed to page, creates a poster of a once popular jousting champion.(50gp)
Glass Eye: A glass eye plucked from a skull's eye socket.(10gp)

The Tale of Sir Bearington: A curious text about a man who was secretly a bear.(75gp)

The Caretaker's Violin: A violin, surrounded by the rot and decay of a sequestered horde, that nevertheless seems to have been lovingly preserved throughout the centuries.(600gp)

Ceremonial Dagger: A dagger made of some metal that absolutely will not hold an edge, however, it is quite ornate.(165gp)

Goblet of Cordette: A pewter goblet, inscribed in many hands in an old dialect, an interpreter could identify the text as the family line and history leading down from a matron named Cordette.(200gp)

A Box of Decorations: A wooden crate loaded with decorations for the festival of Highharvestide. Fireworks, banners, two jars of pickles (miraculously still preserved), a small inner crate of oranges (rotted to green pulp), wide brimmed purple hats, a small statue of a gnome wearing all blue, and a special set of dinnerware.(90gp)

Ceramic Bank: A small ceramic bank with a slot at the top for coinage. It jingles when shaken, and the money can only be retrieved by breaking it. It is worth a lot of money intact to a collector.(660gp)

Candelabra: A golden candlestick holder. (200gp)

Ivory and Obsidian Senet Board: A board made with deep peg holes, and accompanied by ivory and obsidian pegs for the players. Dog heads on the ivory pegs, and eagle heads on the obsidian pegs.(140gp)

A tea set made to commemorate the 500th jubilee of the king of Astorus (it hints at the fact he's a lich).(320gp)

An artistic scroll depicting the tragedy of a great plague, and showing how wizards dealt with it: by containing it in a force field and simply allowing everyone inside to die (more importantly, it shows the symptoms.)(1150gp)

A very rare golden cocoon. The creature which causes this has never been found, and some think that people are making these as a hoax. Many of these golden cocoons are fakes because of how valuable the real ones are (it's a small mystery that the party could solve)(2000gp)

The mounted heads of dragons, and other formidable hunted foes (if the party have just slain a good warrior, show them how badass that warrior was.)(500gp each)

The helm of Lord Llelfain, cracked and dented from the famous fatal warhammer blow (suggesting the typical rivalry between Elves and Dwarves).(1000gp)

Very well drawn plans to machines that would never work, beset with ridiculous ramblings about nonsense such as "perpetual motion". Possibly the works of a certain famous gnome who hasn't done anything so great recently. (and who has actually lost the plot, is a possible future BBEG)(500gp)

Medals, medallions, crowns, trophies and other honours/awards. Again, if the party has killed someone who is skilled or important, show off how skilled they were.(100-600gp each)

Here's a few non storytelling ideas.

A fairy encased in amber.(200gp)

An early thermometer.(300gp)

An early edition of a well known story book.(110gp)

A nicely patterned fan.(40gp)

Wax seals from certain important desks. A good appraiser knows that they're a collector's item just like stamps today.(100gp each)

The Last War Journal of General "X" (change name as flavour requires). A journal writen by the general of the losing side of a famous war. Valuable as a historic document and as a treatise on battle strategy and tactics by a famed, if ultimately unsuccessful general. It also includes coded directions to a reserve supply cache filled with well-made, if not magical, arms, armour and battlefield supplies.(2200gp)

Gramma's Skillet - A well-made, well-used skillet which heats evenly across it's entire surface, resulting in fewer burned meals or unevenly cooked food. Especially valuable to keepers of quality taverns.(80gp)

Mantle of the White Prince - Pure white magic cloak, which resists all staining, repels dirt, mud, blood or anything that could make it dirty and is exceptionally warm when used as a blanket.(750gp)

Dwarflight Prism - a small prism that when properly aligned with a lightsource as weak as a small candle, will completely illuminate a 20x20 room. Larger light sources will increase the area covered but not make the light so bright it is blinding. (600gp)

A black ram's horn capped with gold bands and leather, filled with precious incense.(420gp)

A small clockwork horse.(650gp)

A silver-inlaid straight-razor. Always sharp.(95gp)

A golden locket with a secret catch that causes it to swing open. Inside is a lock of hair and a faded picture of an elven woman.(260gp)

An old battle-standard, and a book of the noble lineages of a lost empire.(400gp together)

A complex puzzle box. Inside is another puzzle box. So on for infinity.(3000gp)

A cracked crystal ball on a silver stand. It still works, but only to see things that happened three days before.(5000gp)

A box of crude tools, covered in blood, and a book on anatomy.(200gp for the book, 3sp for the tools)

A half burnt painting by a famous artist. It holds the clues to who murdered him.(4500gp)

A long purple cloak, studded with dozens of tiny gemstones. To twirl while wearing it makes a rainbow pattern reflect onto your surroundings.(500gp)

A china faced doll, around 9" tall. It has four faces that slide off like theatre masks. The faces depict happiness, sadness, angry and sleeping. The doll has a finely worked wood and class case with hooks for the masks to rest upon when not on the doll. These dolls were made by a royal court artisan for a Kings young daughter. (Potential for this to be a magic item of some kind).(700gp)

A sapphire, an emerald, a ruby and a citrine cut to resemble a water, earth, fire and air elemental which when interlocked for a kind of floating tiara (similar to an ioun stone) which rotates, showing each elemental in turn. Alone, the gemstones are worth a substantial sum but the crown itself is certainly one of a kind.(10 000gp)

A handwritten collection of children's tales, penned and illustrated by a famous bard. The bard is a renown storyteller but favoured the life of the wandering minstrel and so never produced more than a few copies. A Royal seal is stamped, clumsily, on the inside cover. (2500gp)

A nicely-made chess set, with pieces of gold and ivory, with squares of jet and marble.(180gp)

An amusing toby-jug (a mug made in the shape of someone's head) with a caricature of an old king.(20gp)

A triptych - three paintings hinged together - showing scenes from a local deity/saint's life. Would be considered valuable to a nearby church/temple.(1200gp)
A finger bone in a finely-wrought box inlaid with silver. A relic of a famous saint/demigod/etc.(1500gp)

Elf-stones - actually pre-historic flint arrowheads, but popular as good luck charms amongst the local peasantry.(5gp)

Another chess-set, this one carved in soapstone, clearly peasant made, representing elves versus goblins. Should be good for a few silver.(2gp)

A really good fishing rod.(60gp)

The deeds to a nearby manor. You would be very unlikely to overthrow the claim of the people who actually live there, but they'd likely buy back the documents to solidify their position.(500gp)

A silk wedding dress. Would need to be cleaned and repaired (some of the orcs dressed up in it for fun), but should fetch a pretty penny from a bride-to-be.(100gp after subtracting repair costs)

Some magically-fresh flowers.(75gp)

A matched set of gold rings, one sized for a man's finger, one for a woman's. They are designed to mesh together when holding hands.(300gp together)

An Antikythera Mechanism - basically, a box with a handle; turn the handle and various dials and wheels rotate to show the position and phase of the celestial bodies. Unbelievably useful for navigation and other things.(3000gp)

A delicate miniature portrait of a lady (about the size of someone's palm).(250gp)

A comb made from deer antler, studded with bits of mother-of-pearl, carved in geometric patterns.(200gp)

A man's ringer-ring, with an emerald, a diamond, and a ruby set in a line. It kind of looks like the gems should activate something, but it's entirely ordinary.(900gp)

A signet ring, hinged to reveal a tiny secret compartment.(170gp)

A beautifully woven tapestry, showing nature scenes.(780gp)

A delicate paper screen, painted with a scene of a strange-looking warrior, in unusual armour, painted in a style not seen here (imagine a Japanese painted screen showing up in Medieval England).(1100gp)

Three rubies, clearly cut to be set in a ring. One still has traces of the metal that would have held it in place.(300gp each)

A fine dagger, with the ivory hilt carved to match an animal that represents the local ruling power (e.g. from their coat of arms). Eyes made from emeralds.(800gp)

A finely-worked longsword scabbard, covered in red velvet and the fittings in silver. The scabbard, oddly, turns out to be completely fireproof.(460gp)

Holy relics - various bones, skulls, bits of hair, etc. Usually found in ornate reliquaries. Or a vial of dried blood that miraculously liquefies on specific holy days.(1500gp)

A copy of the text of a famous speech, only the words are slightly wrong, with hand-written corrections to the right version.(15gp)

A diary, that turns out to be from a high-ranking member of government or royalty, with Terribly Scandalous Secrets inside. Powerful people (on either side) would pay handsomely.(4000gp)

A fencing manual, detailing long-lost fighting techniques.(800gp)

The coat of arms of a local minor noble, carved in stone and finely painted.(700gp)

Three glass perfume bottles, covered in delicate silver filigree, empty.(40gp each)

A hefty set of bellows worthy of any blacksmith.(10gp)

Fine ingots of steel, superior to what modern smiths can make.(400gp each)

A book containing the recipe for the finest apple pie you ever tasted.(200gp)

A bushel of rare spices.(1400gp)

Bolts of fine silk from a far-away country.(450gp each)

Some pairs of very fashionable shoes.(300gp each)

Some Elven/Dwarven/Whateveran daggers. Not magic, but amazing workmanship.(400gp each)

A preserved hand with six fingers, intricate tattoos, fixed on a chain like a belt loop.(300gp)

A shrunken head with gold ring piercings hanging from a leather thong like a necklace.(300gp)

A golden chastity belt.(500gp)

A priapus statue made of ivory.(100gp)

A large fluid filled jar with an eyeball that swims around in it like a goldfish.(5gp)

A gold wire garrotte.(35gp)

An extremely intricate golden wind-up loon inlaid with small gems. The loon has a loose gear which causes it to completely disassemble once wound. Any competent clock smith can fix it for reasonable price, but once disassembled, only a rare master of those arts can put it back together again. For a very steep price.(500gp broken, 50gp to fix, 1200 gp fixed, 50 gp disassembled, 800gp to put back together)

A copper crown 15 feet in diameter, worth thousands of GP. (Won't fit through most dungeon corridors)(2000gp)

113 golden coins floating gently in clear liquid inside a seamless glass sphere.(313gp)

A stuffed beholder.(2300gp)

A silver statue of an Otyugh. It has tiny holes on top, like a salt shaker. It smells awful.(60gp, would be 100gp without the smell)

A number of tiny chests with tiny locks that contain tiny coins. Looks like they've been shrunk to doll house size, but are actually extremely fine craftsmanship.(150gp each)

An obsidian and ivory chess set with pieces that look exactly like the PCs. It's not magical, the pieces have always been this way.(115gp)

A finely woven tapestry depicting major political figures performing lewd acts with devils.(300gp)

A life size extremely detailed wooden wind-up doll of the pope (or your fantasy world's head of a goodly religion) that laughs maniacally when wound up.(1900gp)

A floor mosaic of great artistic value.(1500gp)

An jeweled crown with screws inside that secure it to the wearer's skull.(3000gp)

A crystal totem pole that depicts strange things with odd numbers of wings, multiple eyes, half-fungal anatomies, pincerstalks, masses of tentacles etc.(4300gp)

Socks that never get wet or dirty. Autosize to feet.(600gp)

Blonde cloak. Upon further inspection it is made out of human hair and is weaved so masterfully that it it shimmers in the sun.(500gp)

Helga's Fabulous Sportsbra. The bra is a new invention and no one makes them better than Helga. The envy of every female adventurer. Wove with gold and silver, each one is specifically designed to be worn by one person. The most comfortable bra on the planet. Reward if one is found and returned to her establishment.(1000gp reward)

A Shield, Wood base, with layers of hide stretched over it, about five or six times. Over that is a bronze cover, embossed with several different scenes. One shows a great battle, another shows the gods, all seated around a table. They seem to be arguing. Each scene is inlaid with gold and silver, and the work is so fine, the characters seem to be real, made not of bronze but flesh. The shield stands about 5' from base to top, and is an elongated hexagonal shape.(450gp)

A crystal ball that shows visions of the future. However, these visions are what the crystal ball wants to see in the future- and the crystal ball is intelligent, a megalomaniac, and very greedy (though not evil). Visions of it on mountains of treasure, being carried on a giant gem-encrusted litter, you giving it all your wealth etc. This item is of no practical use whatsoever.(900gp)

A glass mirror - My history nerd is showing but glass mirrors were highly valuable and sought after because of how fragile they were, most mirrors were polished metal.(350gp)

A holy symbol made of gold and silver that contains a small vial of holy water or a relic of a famous priest.(200gp)

A set of crudely carved bone weapons that appear to be ancient.(600gp historical value)

A gown sewn with gold embroidery and set with many pearls and small gems.(570gp)

Brewer's equipment still in working order.(60gp)

A marble stone plucked from the street of the once famous ancient city of (blank) carved with directions to a market or brothel.(280gp)

A master craft standing harp (like one of the huge ones that are impracticable to carry along on an adventure for a bard).(700gp)

A master craft chain shirt made of gold. The metal would be too soft to actually be of any use as armor. It's made specifically for show.(1050gp)

A silver and mother of pearl brush, comb, and hand mirror the likes of which a queen might use.(500gp)

A silver breastplate sized for a child.(170gp)

A pair of dancing slippers set with small gems and pearls.(210gp)

A scepter made of gold and rubies.(1900gp)

A circlet made of silver, gold, copper and iron braided together and set with diamonds, emerald and amethyst.(1300gp)

A carved ebony jewelry box with a pair of pearl earrings inside.(1300gp all together)

An carved ivory perfume bottle. (130gp)

A painting of the marriage of the king and queen painted on a large slab of tree bark.(400gp)

A written record of the linage of the king and all of the nobles going back four hundred years. Marking things such as hair color and eye color as it passes down bloodlines.(870gp)

A scroll detailing the tactics an ancient king used to win a seemingly impossible battle.(600gp)

A master craft set of writing quills and ink pot.(500g)

A jeweled 'dragon egg' made of silver.(2000gp)

A set of barding for a riding dog.(50gp)

A wooden mask set with veins of copper and small emeralds to look like vines and leaves. Used in ancient fertility rites.(350gp)

A large piece of amber with a butterfly trapped inside.(80gp)

A collection of crystals the size of a thumbnail in various colors.(200gp total)

A well made wooden knight toy with movable arms and a small iron sword.(70gp)

A well crafted set of shackles.(200gp)

Eyeglasses with intricate leaf designs in gold and silver on the frames(550gp)

A pink garnet and blue fluorite bracelet sized for a giant(1200gp)

An illustrated children's book that has been magicked up so that the illustrations act out the scenes from the text(1080gp)

An ivory burial mask in the shape of a skull with star sapphire eyes(3500gp)

A locked chest full of rare perfumery ingredients (fragrant woods and resins, exotic spices, carrier oils, etc) with some perfumes in stoppered bottles(2000gp)

A bronze censer with intricate onyx, coral and chalcedony inlays depicting unusual birds(400gp)

A wind-up clockwork snake made of jade and mother-of-pearl(1000gp)

A wardrobe filled with well-made costumes(2300gp total)

An eyepatch with beautiful gold, silver, and copper embroidered optical illusion; appears to be a different picture depending on which eye it is worn over(1300gp)

A small display case containing the medals and honors of a famous historical general(1470gp)

A set of porcelain dolls depicting the royal family from several centuries ago(300gp)

A magical breadknife that toasts bread as you cut it(400gp)

Pearl-inlaid master-crafted sewing kit (scissors, needles, thimble, etc)(600gp)

Ceremonial armor, weapons, etc. (all kinds of ceremonial purposes and precious metals/gemstones used could be devised)(200gp-1000gp each)

A magical mirror that allows the user to see through to a twin mirror. When the user looks through, they can see that the twin is on the shelf at a brothel in some exotic location spying on exotic women. It would be near impossible to determine where the brothel is, but the mirror might be sold as a peep show?(6500gp)

A ring that allows the wearer to fit into clothes too small for them, and that makes them several pounds lighter when weighed.(1500gp)

A collection of coins from historical empires near and far, worth more than their face value, of course!(1070gp total)

A pixie-sized jewelry box filled with tiny jewelry strung on gossamer threads(520gp)

A mastercrafted saddle, made of (exotic creature appropriate to setting e.g. dragon) skin. The saddle is sized for a halfling riding a pony.(500 gp)

A collection of awful, unskilled paintings by some noble who considered him/herself an artist. The frames are made of expensive woods and inlaid with gold and precious gems. Perhaps the noble painted on the back of a first draft of an important legal document or missing page out of a royal genealogy register?(Can be taken apart to obtain goods worth 600gp.)

A small silver canister with a cow inlaid in ebony and ivory that when overturned makes a "moo" sound from some mechanism inside (or perhaps the picture/sound of some fantasy creature instead).(230gp)

A signed first edition copy of a famous smith's guide to making weapons (the guide has a lot of factually incorrect material, as the famous smith sought to prevent competition. Thus many of the books were trashed, making it a rare, albeit useless, collectible)(970gp)

A well-rendered map to a city that no longer exists. Or more interestingly, that does not exist ... yet!(120gp)

A magically-preserved bouquet of flowers that never needs water(110gp)

A wind-up snow globe contains a village with tiny sims that work, play, sleep, etc.(1600gp)

Gem encrusted time pieces, from pocket watches to grandfather clocks.(400-3000gp each)

A silver-plated oil lamp with a crystal orb above the flame filled with something that acts like a lava lamp while lit.(600gp)

A gem-encrusted clockwork hookah. Light it and wind it up and watch it puff out random shapes of animals while you smoke.(1300gp)

A magic costume party mask studded with gems that light up when the wearer talks.(840gp)

A fine feathered hat with miniature birds that flap their wings when the wearer moves or stands in a windy place.(350gp)

Hollow earrings filled with expensive perfume. Twisting them activates a clockwork that spritzes a subtle bit every few minutes.(500gp with perfume, 350gp empty)

A brass temple collection box with a scroll mount and ink receptacle. Insert a coin and pull the lever to activate an inner stamp which prints a short verse, spits it out, and cuts the paper.(930gp)

Animated rich kids toys

A Golden wind-up toy horse and carriage.(300gp)

A nutcracker adorned in finery that speaks when the lever is worked.(200gp)

Platinum wind-up marching toy soldiers.(250gp each)

A jeweled wind-up music box with spinning ballerina.(500gp)

A doll adorned in finery that speaks when a string is pulled. (200gp)

A wind-up one-man band toy clown, with tiny master-crafted instruments strapped all over him which he plays when activated.(500gp)

A signet ring made from an unknown metal (tungsten alloy) for a noble house that died out 195 yrs ago.(1300gp)

A black velvet bag of what is apparently broken multicolored glass, it is actually the remains of a shattered gemstone lampshade.(170gp)

A funeral mask carved from whalebone, inlaid with gold and platinum.(600gp)

A holy symbol to a household goddess, carved from a single piece of volcanic glass. You are unsure exactly what it depicts.(100gp)

Wind chimes made from alternating pieces of polished petrified wood and shattered blades. There is a colorful tag which apparently makes it a gift to someone, but the names have long since faded.(250gp)

A brooch made from a bronzed centipede. Its death rictus is unnerving.(300gp)

A 3' diameter calendar wheel, carved from a cross section of mahogany trunk. The details and days are inlaid with silver with icons inlaid with bits of broken turqoise. The calendar is accurate but all of the months are written in the tongue of magic.(800gp)

Eleven Beautiful cast-pewter, gold plated replicas of shamanistic totems. Each bears a maker's mark on the bottom, along with a set number. This set is roughly half completed.(1500gp)

Eyeglasses, rimmed with silver wire. The left lens is tinted slightly green and is much stronger than the right.(200gp)

Shiftspice: Small vial of iridescent-to-grey powder, that, when tasted, tastes exactly like one expects. (bonus to prof cook) -Planescape:Torment(800gp)

Modern reproduction of famous ancient jewlery, with new materials (ie steel, wood from far-away places)(50gp)

Very long, intricately patterned floor coverings (long rug). -Entertaining when the players try and decide whether a 10gp/lin ft(3lb) rug is worth stuffing in the bag of holding. 'It'll look nice in the front hall!(750gp)


Enchanted children's toys: menagerie of animals who roar, trot, or 'fight' each other, depending on what they're matched with.(2000gp together)

Tiny silver chalice with an unreadable inscription (too faint). -Trophy from a long-dead minor hero, who did nothing of huge import. Could be haunted by the hero - hero could be a bully.(100gp)

Blacksmith's puzzle made of gem pieces.(400gp)

Original, but unknown, poetry, bardic tales, or plays. Quality can differ.(1-50 gp each)

Weapon/armor with a famous maker's mark, but obviously not at the height of the crafter's skill (non-MW). (80gp)

Diaries, Logs, and account books from abandoned places. -Historians love that ****. Also, could give a +1,+2 if doing kno: history for the area(100gp-1000gp each)

Ancient coins/equivalent -can sell at face value, or try and sell as art, over a period of time for more $ (so as not to depreciate the 'market') Like finding a buffalo nickel in your change, but a whole handful.(Think we already have this.)

Ancient, inferior/different ink, paint, alchemicals, materials (like bar stock for smiths) -interest to historians, researchers in a craft(500gp)

Use of Kno: Architecture/Engineering to create plans/drawings of old citadels(100gp each)

Use of Kno: History to create an anthropological diary of the places the heroes have been -ala Darwin; Saw leatherback turtle, big, soft shelled, grey. Tough, but tasty with butter and salt.(100gp each)

Map to hidden treasure of un/listed value.(1250gp)

Tribal religious icons that show stunning similarities to known gods (50gp each)

Previous location delver's/party member's remains (basic gear like rope, wedges, hammer, grapnel, empty potion vials, backpacks/sacks, weapons/armor(damaged)(50gp)
Copper/bronze weapons of strange size, shape, weighting. -Old elvish stuff(75gp each)

Notes on theoretical magics long ago proven/disproven -could allow +/- 1-2 on spellcraft depending on which way you want to go with that. Have a DC to identify if good. regardless, should be worth something to historian/collector.(800gp)

[Bullet06320]

Editors note: Sanctaphrax started posting 22 months after the original thread was posted and continued to post off and on for years until his final post about 2 years ago. The next 3 posts of this thread are all his posts compiled for easy reading, he himself numbered the posts so that made it easier to follow his specific work, just merely some cleaning up by myself



1. Masterwork glass eyes
A collection of glass eyeballs made by the finest glassblowers in the land. A must for the one or no eyed BBBBEG, especially if he's undead. Worth 12 000 gp in all, but very difficult to find a buyer for.

The collection contains:

-Three pairs of well made but otherwise nondescript eyes of various colours.
-One pair of blank red eyes, slightly translucent.
-One pair of blank white eyes, completely opaque.
-One pair of eyes with large triangular irises and tiny square pupils.
-One pair of green eyes with slitted pupils like those of a cat.
-One pair of black glass eyes set with precious gems in concentric circles.
-One pair of real eyes, taken from an unlucky adventurer and coated with glass.
-One transparent eye with a ruby in the center.
-One transparent eye with a tiny painting of the BBBBEG's dead wife/daughter in the center.
-One transparent eye with a preserved insect in the center.
-One transparent eye with a very small golden key in the center.
-One map of the world, carved into an eyeball-sized glass globe.
-One hollow eye made out of adamantine and indestructible crystal, set with a keyhole for a pupil.

2. Writing desk
An enormous, ornate table with three drawers set into the right side, made of polished darkwood and inlaid with mother of pearl. The center of the table contains a slanted writing surface. To the left is a filing rack that contains every sort of paper imaginable, from scraps of tree bark to the heavy golden paper used by dwarven gods. To the right is a glass structure set with inkwells filled with a dizzying variety of inks and paints from throughout the planes, including human blood. The uppermost drawer is filled by a huge set of writing utensils: charcoal sticks, fountain pens, and everything in between. The middle drawer contains thousands upon thousands of handwriting samples, sorted by plane, time of writing, writer's area of origin, and writer's socioeconomic status. The bottom drawer contains three enormous books. The first book is an index of the handwriting samples in the second drawer along with an analysis of the writing styles of various planes, kingdoms, and social groups throughout history. The second book is a scholarly tome written by the great wizard and calligrapher who invented the explosive runes spell. It explains what a person's handwriting, particularily their signature, says about them and how one can change one's writing in order to provide a certain impression. There is no mention of magic. The third and final book is a practical how-to guide to forgery, heavily annotated by the owner of the desk. The annotations are considerably more helpful to the aspiring forger than the original text of the book is.
The desk and everything on it is worth 80 000 gp. 16 000 gp for the desk, 8000 gp for the paper, 8000 gp for the ink, 5000 gp for the writing utensils, 13 000 gp for the handwriting samples, and 10 000 gp for each of the books. The contents of the desk provide a +6 bonus to Craft or Forgery checks used to create or imitate handwriting.

A pair of fancy rooms for your BBEG's fortress that can double as treasure once the players have killed him.

3. Gambling Room
A small, cozy room about three meters in length and width. The ceiling, the floor, and three of the four walls are covered in soft green felt. The fourth is made of thin glass, providing an amazing view of the fighting pits below. The room is illuminated by a single lantern hanging from the ceiling in the center of the room.
Directly beneath the lantern there is a large oak table surrounded by leather armchairs. The center of the table is set with a silver plated roulette wheel, with the numbers picked out in ivory on small red or black felt squares at the top of each slot. The center of the wheel is decorated with a small gold statue of Lady Luck, wearing a blindfold and and carrying a bag of dice. At the touch of a button the wheel sinks into the table and is covered by an oak board.
There is an icebox stocked with various alchoholic drinks off in one corner. On top of this icebox is a small wooden chest that contains dice and playing cards. Each pack of cards was custom made for the BBEG by a skilled scribe. The king looks exactly like him, the queen resembles his wife, and the jack resembles his son. The backs of the cards are marked with the family crest/coat of arms/personal sigil/symbol of the patron diety of the BBEG. The dice are featureless onyx cubes with spots painted on with bioluminescent algae. In a dark room like this one, the spots glow with an eerie green light.
The contents of this room as a whole are worth 950 gp. 200 gp for all five chairs, 600 gp for the table and the roulette wheel, 100 gp for the glowing dice, 50 gp for the icebox and everything in it, and nothing for the cards. The cards are just too tacky to sell.

4. Torture Chamber
A small circular room about four metres in diameter, located deep underground. The floor, wall, and ceiling are made of fine white ceramic tiles, with the edges coated in gold leaf. Long slanted grooves are cut into the floor to allow blood to drain properly into the sewers below. Each tile on the wall has been decorated with a picture of the face of a human in extreme pain. All of these pictures are the same, since they were all drawn with the same paint and the same stencil by the same person.
There is a small platform in the center of the room. In the center of this platform stands a golden cross slightly larger than a man. Each end of this cross is studded with pearls of enormous size and luster. A set of adjustable silver manacles is attached to the arms of the cross next to the pearls. When a discreet lever on the back of the cross is pulled, the arms of the cross extend, stretching the unfortunate person who is manacled to the cross.
Spaced evenly along the circular wall are four ornate silver coffins upon silver pedestals. The body of a girl, beautifully sculpted from shining brass, protrudes from the front of each coffin. The interior of each coffin is lined with tiny spikes, forcing the person trapped inside to stand up straight at all times or be cut. If the owner of the chamber believes that the prisoner is getting too comfortable, the pedestal can be filled with burning wood at the touch of a button, heating the metallic coffin to an unbearable degree. Alternatively, ice cold water can be pumped in through a discreet pipe connected to the pedestal. This is also useful for cleaning the inside of the coffin after use. When the prisoner is thought to be ready to talk, a sliding panel can be opened in the mouth to allow sound to escape.
The contents of this room are worth roughly 20 000 gp. 5000 for the cross, 3500 for each coffin, and 1000 for the tiles on the walls if they are extracted undamaged. The stencil with which the drawings on the wall were made is itself a great work of art and is worth 4000 gp if the players can find it.
If the players have moral objections to selling instruments of torture, the value of the goods drops considerably. If broken down for materials, the cross is worth 1000 gp and the coffins are worth 500 gp each.

5. Polychromatic Lichen, aka Painter's Mold

Environment: Polychramatic Lichen grows on rocks and ice sheets in the far north.

Appearance: Like a sheet of paint. It forms bands of colour in the whiteness of the arctic.

Uses: Polychromatic Lichen is used as a decoration for buildings by frost giants and people of the far north. It can't survive in warm climates, but it is nonetheless valuable down south for its uses in the manufacture of dyes and paints.

Value: The lichen itself is worth roughly 25 gp/kilogram for most colours, with a substantially greater price for the rare purple and the difficult to spot white. A kilogram of lichen yields roughly five grams of dye at a price of 25 gp/gram, once again adjusted for colour.

Portability: Easy. Chip it off whatever surface you found it on and throw it in a bucket.


6. Crystalline Creeper, aka Shinevine

Environment: Shinevines grow along the trunk and branches of trees in tropical rainforests.

Appearance: Like a rope made of quartz, studded with ruby flowers.

Uses: Rich people up north often want Shinevines for their gardens, to show off their wealth and decorate their estates. In its native habitat, it is used for rope and string.

Value: In its native habitat, it's worth roughly 3 cp/meter. Up north, it's worth 200 gp/meter alive and 2 gp/meter dead.

Portability: Shinevine is easy to transport so long as you don't mind it dying. If you want it to survive, though, you'll have to remove it from the tree very carefully in a process that takes hours of time and a great deal of skill. Worse, the vine must be provided with water, sunlight, and nutrition almost constantly. And most inconvenient of all, the temperature around it can never be allowed to drop below 20 degrees Celsius. Ten minutes of exposure to 10 degree air will kill Shinevine.

7. Vampire Bush, aka Bleeder

Environment: Vampire Bushes grow in the dirt of a temperate forest or city.

Appearance: Very boring. A brown and green ball of leaves, with thorns visible if you look closely.

Uses: The thorns of the Vampire Bush contain a potent anticoagulent that causes wounds to bleed profusely. This anticoagulent is valuable for its uses as a medicine and poison.

Value: The bushes themselves are worthless and common. The medicine extracted from the bush is worth 5 gp/litre. One bush provides one tenth of a litre of medicine per "milking" and half a litre if taken completely apart. Milking a bush takes an hour and taking one apart takes three hours.

Portability: The bushes are bulky, somewhat dangerous, and liable to die if uprooted, but since they're worthless that really does not matter. The medicine is light and easy to move, but it will lose is potency if exposed to air and so must be transported in sealed containers.

8. Sunshade Palm, aka Umbrella Tree

Environment: Sunshade Palms grow in the sandy soil of the southern deserts.

Appearance: A light brown cylinder topped with a wide, perfectly circular patch of green leaves.

Uses: Sunshade Palms are great for relaxing under. Major cities and noble estates often grow groves of them in parks and on beaches.

Value: The average Sunshade Palm is about two meters tall and sells for 20 gp. Multiply/divide the price by five for every meter taller or shorter.

Portability: Sunshade palms are heavy, but otherwise easy to move. Dragging them on a sled behind a team of horses or oxen is recommended.

9. Rainbow Mushrooms, aka Corpsebursters

Environment: Corpsebursters grow from the bodies of dead animals in forests and cities.

Appearance: Ugly grey bulbs covered in protruding lumps.

Uses: They get you high. Eat one and you'll be watching rainbows for hours.

Value: 15 gp each. The active ingredient of the shrooms, if extracted, sells for sells for 18 000 gp per litre. It takes 600 mushrooms to provide a litre of the active ingredient.

Portability: Easy as long as the mice don't get at them: they love them as much as humans do.

10. Utopia Tree, aka God's Gift

Environment: Utopia Trees grow in inhabited regions during times of famine. Climate is irrelevant.

Appearance: A small tree with triangular leaves. Beautiful golden fruit hang from the branches.

Uses: The fruit of the utopia tree is perhaps the perfect food. It's delicious, it's nutritious, you can live off of one for three days. Furthermore, the tree is sacred to all major religions. Travelling to a Utopia Tree and eating one of its fruit is a common pilgrimage. A single Utopia Tree can feed a city.

Value: Each fruit is worth 100 gp in any region that does not contain a utopia tree. The tree itself is worth 5 000 000 gp.

Portability: The fruit is sturdy and never goes bad, so it's easy to move. The tree can survive without water, sunlight, or nutrition, so it's also pretty easy to move. Unfortunately, both are sacred and profiting from the fruit of the Utopia Tree is blasphemous. Trees are therefore kept under armed gaurd to deter fruit trafficking. All fruit picked must be eaten in plain view of the guards. If some brazen fellow were to steal an entire tree, he would destabilize the economy of the entire region and likely start a war.

11. Drazil Tree, aka Island Mangrove

Environment: The only known Drazil Tree is growing in the center of the Grand Western Ocean.

Appearance: BIG. The tree is rooted in water, with the tops of the roots rising above the surface to form a circular island roughly 85 kilometers in radius. The trunk is a brown pillar about a kilometer wide and eight kilometers tall. Thousands of enormous branches sprout from the trunk in every direction. Each of those branches is covered in long, blade-shaped leaves. Buildings of every sort have been constructed upon the roots and branches.

Uses: A single Drazil Tree can support several countries. The roots, and branches provide ample space and material for the construction of buildings and everyday goods, while the leaves, sap, and seeds are all edible. Caves can be carved into the trunk and lived in. The air around the upper trunk and branches is too thin for any of the common races, but some hardy species thrive there.

Value: A Drazil Tree is not so much owned as it is ruled. There's only one of them in the world and it's not for sale. The seeds, however, are worth 100 gp each on the tree and 1000 gp off it. The wood is also reasonably valuable, bringing in a price of 100 gp/ton.

Portability: The tree isn't going anywhere. Even a god couldn't move it. The seeds are more movable since they are only about two meters long and don't spoil easily. The wood, as long as it's dry, is also fairly easy to transport.
12. People are treasure too

Having slain a number of medusas, gorgons, evil wizards, or other baddies with petrification powers, the players come across six life sized human statues lying on the ground in the villains' lair. It should be pretty obvious that the statues are petrified people. Once unpetrified, these people will be glad to get on with their lives and grateful to the adventurers who saved them.

The first one, an 11-year-old girl named Nymna Sall, was petrified about two months ago after running away from home. Her parents are offering a substantial reward for her safe return.

The second one, a 53-year-old spice merchant named Winston Wallson, was petrified one and a half years ago while travelling to a nearby city to sell spices. He will willingly give the players a substantial portion of his goods, but some of them have gone bad in the year and a half he spent as a statue. If the players bring him safely to his house in the next town, they will have earned the friendship and support of a rather wealthy and powerful man.

The third and fourth statues are those of Winstons bodyguards: a pair of third level fighters named Wallace and William. They have no money, but will fight for the players to repay their debt.

The fifth statue, an 84-year-old woman named Bessassu, was petrified 120 years ago after being exiled from her hometown for the crime of witchcraft. As it happens, she really is a witch. She will share a number of secrets, including magical formulae, with the players in thanks for saving them. She will also give them an ancient treasure map she got from her grandmother, which shows the location of a fortune in gold.

The sixth and final statue is than of Graeagga, a man of indeterminate age who has spent the past 14 955 years as a statue. He speaks an ancient dead language and is constantly amazed by the modern world. The things he knows are worth a huge amount to any ancient historian, and he will gladly share that money with the players.

13. Elven Flute
A masterwork flute made of pink glass and white ivory. Worth 1800 gp to a musician or collector.

14. Prison Beads
A dozen amber teardrops of varying size, each with a different insect trapped inside. Worth 750 gp.

15. Unbreakable Handcuffs
Masterwork handcuffs made from purest adamantine. DC 35 strength check to break. Worth 3000 gp.

16. Nice Hat
A top hat covered in gold foil, with a thin mithril rim around the bottom. Worth 200 gp.

17. Ravenwood's Notes
A pile of loose papers covered with blueprints for sadistic traps. Signed and sealed by the god of traps before his ascension. Worth 20 000 gp to a trapmaker, paranoid king, or priest of the trap god.

18. Stone Watch
A polished granite disk with a complex mechanism in the center that keeps excellent time. Worth 500 gp.

19. Throne of Bones
A good, old-fashioned pile of skeletons molded vaguely into the shape of a chair and kept together with iron clasps. Satin pillows are piled along the inside to make it ore comfortable. Worth 5000 gp to a wealthy madman.

20. Stuffed Imp
Just what the name implies: an imp from the Nine Hells of Baator, dead, stuffed, and mounted on a pedestal. It looks ready to bite off your head. Worth 600 gp.

21. Eyepatch
A small piece of black felt with an emblem made of coloured felt attached to the front. The emblem can be anything: a smiley face, an eye, a skull and crossbones, whatever. Worth 15 gp each.

22. Parrot
A colourful exotic bird about eight inches tall. Swears in twelve languages and sits on your shoulder while you go about your day. Trained at length not to poop on your shoulder. Worth 600 gp.

23. Peg Leg
A length of carved darkwood, heavily varnished. The sides are decorated with silver skulls and golden bones. Worth 1100 gp.

24. Hook Hand
A long, wickedly curved hook made entirely of adamantine. It attaches directly to the bones in your wrist. A small hollow chamber near the tip allows the hook to inject poisons into those it strikes. Worth 3000 gp.

25. Figurehead
A wooden statue of a beautiful girl with her arms outstretched, designed to be mounted at the front of a sailing ship. The eyes are flawless pearls. It would be worth 15 000 gp, but with all the damage it's taken over the years it's only worth 4000 gp.

26. The Flag
It's just an ordinary black cloth with a skull and crossbones printed on it, but it's worth a 10 000 gp bounty if you bring it to the king of Atalia.

27. Charts and Maps
A collection of masterwork sea charts showing the geography of the nearby oceans. One of them shows the location of the fabled treasure of Captain John. The normal maps are worth 5000 gp in all. The treasure map is worth 15 000 gp if you can prove it's authentic, but perhaps you would be better off following it.

28. Wire Dragon
A hand-sized sculpture of the gold dragon Sperathrax as a wyrmling. It is made of copper wires coated in gold. The wires form a sort of three-dimensional outline of the dragon's body with tiny rubies for eyes. Adventurers who obtain the sculpture should remember that the sculpture is quite fragile. If treated roughly, the thin wires will bend and ruin the sculpture. Worth 1300 gp intact. The sculpture is currently in the hoard of Sperathrax, whose attachment to the sculpture far exceeds its value.

29. Giant Baby Head
An enormous statue of a male baby's head, about six feet wide and six feet high. It is made of porcelain and painted so well that one could mistake it for the real thing if it wasn't so big. The original owner paid 65 000 gp for it, but players will be lucky to sell it for 15 000. It currently hangs from the ceiling in the Atalian National Art Gallery.

30. Temple Dog
A statue of a dog carved from green soapstone. It's about three feet high, four feet long, and two feet wide. Statues of this sort are commonly used as symbolic guardians for temples in the Xyth region. A well crafted temple dog will sell for about 2000 gp.

31. Army in a Box
Three hundred clay soldiers, each about one inch tall. Every single one is unique, with a distinct face and paint job. Each figurine represents one of the bodyguards of King Lazax, a the first and greatest king of Xyth. The figures are currently in the tomb of King Lazax. Each figure rests upon the coffin of the man it represents. This is possible because the entire bodyguard was entombed with the king to protect him in the afterlife. Worth 25 000 gp in all.

32. Cow of Ymir
A five-meter ice sculpture depicting a cow. Created by the frost giant sculptor Ymed in homage to the legendary cow that nourished Ymir in frost giant mythology. According to the legends, Ymir was the first being to emerge from the chaos before the creation of the world. The cow is on display in front of the great temple of Ymir in Jotunheim. It is worth roughly 30 000 gp.

33. Undying Flowers
A full garden of coloured glass flowers. The current owner, King Byron of Atalia, proudly displays them in front of his palace. He boasts that no real flowers could ever be half so beautiful, and he may well be right. Each flower is worth about 70 gp and the full garden contains five hundred flowers. King Byron is currently experiencing some financial troubles and might be willing to sell at least part of the garden for the right price (ie: more than it's worth).

34. Spirit Guide
A twelve-foot tall, eighteen-inch wide totem pole. The carvings resemble the heads of various animals stacked on top of one another. These sculptures are placed in the graveyards of the Uriu people to protect and guide the souls of the dead. Each one is worth about 8 000 gp and the undying hatred of any Uriu who finds out that you stole one.

35. Sculptor's Delight
A large block of uncarved marble. The stone is of an extremely high quality and is absolutely perfect for a stonecarver hoping to create a masterpiece. Worth 1500 gp.

- It's amazing how much money you can spend on food. You have to wonder, really, how good a four hundred dollar steak tastes. But maybe it's not about the taste. Maybe it's about showing off your money and power. And if people do it in real life, they can do it more in a world of fantasy. Here's my take on what the uber-rich of the Material Plane eat when they want to show off.

36. Sugar-Glazed Beholder Eyeball
The main eyeball of a beholder, delicious and sweet thanks to a couple months spent soaking in sugar water. Worth 5500 gp.

37. Salted Fried Kraken Tentacle
A 30 foot tube of muscle and slime, cooked in oil and heavily salted. Appetizing, huh? It's actually pretty good, although chewy. Generally cut into tiny pieces and swallowed without chewing. Worth 12 000 gp, feeds 200.

38. Dragonblood Pudding
A thick soup made of dragon blood mixed with horse milk. Strong metallic taste. Superstition claims that a pregnant woman who eats dragonblood pudding will give birth to twins, triplets, or even more children. Furthermore, these children are purported to be destined for great things. Each bowl is worth 8000 gp, but the price would plummet if the supply increased. For that reason, those who slay dragons and collect the blood generally don't sell it all at once.

39. Dire Shark Fin Soup
Like normal shark fin soup, but manlier. Honestly, it tastes exactly the same. Nonetheless, it is vastly more expensive. One fin's worth of soup costs 1600 gp.

40. Boiled Couatl Egg
The shiny, rainbow-hued egg of a Couatl. It contains an unborn Couatl embryo, which has been killed by boiling. They say it tastes like chicken. Worth 15 000 gp.

41. Gelatinous Cube Jelly
A cupful of jelly from a gelatinous cube, sprinkled with flecks of mithril. Looks beautiful, tastes SOUR. Must be prepared very carefully in order to avoid inflicting acid damage upon the consumer. A small amount of paralyzing venom remains after the preparation, causing a pleasant feeling of numbness in the throat. One cup is worth 400 gp. Just in case you were wondering, the mithril flakes make your poop sparkle.
Treasure doesn't have to be magical to be useful. Many tools that we take for granted nowadays would be rare and valuable in your standard-issue D&D campaign setting. For example:

42. Magnifying Glass
A five-centimeter wide circular piece of glass attached to an iron handle. When you look through it, everything looks bigger. The user gets a +4 bonus to any skill check that requires them to work with very small details. Worth 500 gp.

43. Lock
A small masterwok padlock made entirely of adamantine and decorated with gold filigree inlaid in a complex geometric pattern. Hardness 20, 5 hp, DC 30 to break or pick the lock. Worth 4 000 gp.

44. Wristwatch
A very accurate clockwork timepiece, made to be worn on the wrist with a heavy leather strap. The back of the watch displays the monogram of Johan Sach, a famous clockmaker. Worth 6 500 gp.

45. Carriage
A carriage designed to be drawn by a team of oxen. It looks like a very fancy house mounted on caterpiller tracks. It's got everything: two floors, three featherbeds, a fireplace, a chimney, four armchairs, a pantry, and a bookshelf. You could live in here. Worth 60 000 gp.

46. Sailboat
A prettied-up caravel, equpped for an ocean crossing. The entire bottom of the ship is coated with a thick layer of solid gold, preventing barnacles from adhering to the hull. The sails have been dyed purple and embroidered with the holy symbol of Hextor in golden thread. The interior of the ship is fairly normal, apart from the luxurious captain's cabin. Worth 120 000 gp.

47. Painkillers
It's opium, not to put too fine a point on it. Dissolved in milk. Very useful for a doctor, but also valued for certain nonmedical purposes. Worth 500 gp/litre.

48. Antibiotics
A vile smelling green cream. Kills bacteria and staves off infection. Provides a +4 modifier to Heal checks made to prevent or treat bacterial infections. Worth 200 gp/jar.

not all pieces of treasure are objects. Animals can be valuable too. For example:

49. Hunting Dog
A purebred albino bloodhound from the famous kennels of King Thar. These fine beasts are stronger, faster, healthier, and better trained than ordinary animals. Each wears a beautiful rhinestone collar engraved with the owner's monogram. Perfect for making the rest of your hunting party jealous. Each hound is worth 750 gp, including the collar.

50. Warhorse
A huge brown stallion covered in hundreds of battle scars. He may be ugly and hard to keep under control, but this horse has gone through twelve wars and outfought his rider each time. Named Gog, Parat, Ols, Fraxch, or Trijok depending on which former owner's ghost you ask. He'll cost you 3000 gp if you think you can handle him.

51. Peacock
Exotic and beautiful, with an awe-inspiring tail display. Bit hard to take care of, though: it won't eat anything except sugared grapes. For the man with too much money and nothing to brag about. Costs 7 000 gp.

52. Dancing Bear
An ordinary grizzly bear at first glance. A virtuoso dancer on closer inspection. While the appeal of dancing bears is generally novelty rather than skill, this one is actually very talented. He spins and tiptoes and, believe it or not, actually jumps in the style of a traditional ballerina. 11 000 gp and cheap for the price.

53. War Elephant
The largest animal you have ever seen, guaranteed. Outfitted with an inch of steel armor and six foot blades attached to the trunk. Totally capable of trampling an army, and scary as hell when it charges. 40 000 gp will bring him into your army

[Bullet06320]

Part 2 was requested by Theapokalypseshovel




All right, here's my opera hall writeup. I won't be writing anything about the vampire or his organization, since that's not really the point of this thread. I also won't be giving any specific values for anything since I don't know how much treasure Theapokalypseshovel wants to give his party. That said, here's the first part of the opera hall: the exterior of the building.

54. Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall (Exterior)

Imagine the biggest, gaudiest, most incredibly overdone building you've ever seen. Give it the size and grandeur of the Colosseum in Rome, the ornamental beauty of the Forbidden City in Beijing, and the graceful style of a Las Vegas casino. Throw in the subtlety and class of a rapper's jewellery. That's what the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall looks like.

The building is elliptical, about 150 metres long and 100 metres wide. Literally the entire building is coated in a thin sheet of gold. You would expect it to be a theft magnet...but those who try tend to disappear. Besides, the gold is so thin that if you melted it all down you could fit it in a backpack.

Protruding from the golden walls are hundreds of statues of everything from heroes to abberations. They seem to be scattered across the walls at random, with nothing so undignified as a plan to diminish their visibility. Each and every one of them has been painted in colours so vivid as to make a neon sign look discreet. One of the most popular books in the city is sold at a nearby stall. It's a guide to the statues on the walls of the hall.

The roof is a huge dome, impressive to look at but doomed to collapse due to structural instability within a decade. This reflects one of the most important themes in the construction of the hall: the prioritisation of style over substance. The techniques used in the construction of the hall are simply too crude and too shoddy to enable the construction of such a huge structure. They built it anyway, at a fraction of what it should have cost, and now it's going to fall down before the youngest performers in the opera begin to shave.

Regardless of the structural concerns, the building is a fantastically successful tourist attraction and a cornerstone of the local economy. Nobody visits the city without going to the opera hall.
Second part of the opera hall here. This post details the interior of the opera hall. After this there will be one more post about the opera hall, listing some treasures that one might find inside the hall.

55. Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall (Interior)

i) First Floor (Main Hall)

The first floor is where the public comes to listen to opera. There's only one room on this floor: an enormous elliptical auditorium with a green-carpeted floor sloping gently downwards from the doors at one end of the building to the stage at the other. The room is lit by dozens of small lanterns attached to the inside of the roof and walls, giving the appearance of the night sky. Discreet ventilation ducts in the floor and ceiling allow the hot gases from the lanterns to escape. These ducts are also useful for vampires in gaseous form trying to travel quickly and stealthily from floor to floor.

The stage itself is exceptionally large but otherwise quite ordinary. Well-hidden trapdoors allow performers to enter and exit the stage suddenly. A complex rope and pulley system allows the backdrops and props to be raised and lowered within seconds. When not in use, the props and backdrops can be stored in a large cage attached to the roof above the stage.

Beneath the stage is a partially covered pit where the orchestra plays. The sound from this pit is muffled slightly so that the audience can hear the voices of the performers above the sound of the orchestra.

The audience is sorted into two categories upon entry: rich and poor. The poor are left to stand on the floor in whatever space they can elbow the other poor out of, while the rich are led to a small elevator located just beside the doors. This elevator leads up to the rafters of the hall, where the skychairs hang.

The skychairs are essentially just very comfortable chairs, surrounded by iron railings and suspended from the rafters by gilded chains. Each is equipped with a speaking device that allows the customer to have their chair raised or lowered as they wish. Some of the city's richest men own their own skychairs, often decorating them extravagantly to show off their wealth and power.

It should be noted that the acoustics of the room are much better for those in the skychairs.

ii) First Basement (Cast Rooms)

This floor is accessible only by a few staircases and trapdoors on, around, and behind the stage. It contains the staging area, the change rooms, the pulley room, and the storage area. The public is not allowed in.

The decor of this floor is rather shabby and poorly maintained. The white paint on the walls is peeling and there are cracks in the floor. A vampire in gaseous form could easily fit through the cracks.

The staging area is located directly beneath the stage. This is where actors wait before going on stage. It's a simple empty round room, ideal for a big fight. To the left is the storage area, to the right are the change rooms, and straight ahead are the pulley rooms.

The change rooms are a couple of mirror-filled rooms with wooden lockers filled with costumes on the walls. This is where the actors get ready to go on stage. Next to the two main change rooms are a couple of smaller ones with stars on the doors. The best and most famous actors are allowed to change there in privacy.

The pulley room is a small square room filled with winches. One for the elevator, one for each skychair, one for the backdrop, etc. During performances two burly vampire spawn stand here moving skychairs, props, and backdrops up and down. The speaking tubes of the skychairs are connected to this room.

The storage area is just a big square room full of props and costumes. Not at all interestingly decorated.

iii) Second Basement (Management Offices)

The nicest part of the building. Not tacky like the first floor or decrepit like the first basement. The floor is covered with a thick grey carpet and the walls are painted grey. The only real decoration is the occasional painting or sculpture. There's not much remarkable about this floor. It's just a nice place to carry out legitimate business.

iv) Third Basement (Criminal Enterprises)

This bit is up to Theapokalypseshovel.

Anyway, here's the third and final part of the opera hall: the contents. This post describes the treasure that your players can actually take home after looting the opera hall.

56. The Sign
The bronze plaque on the doors is instantly recognizable. There's no other sign like it. Worth major bragging rights, and maybe some money to someone who wants a trophy.

57. Skychairs
Some of the richer patrons of the opera house have covered their personal chairs in gold and jewels. Ripping apart the chair and taking the jewels will be profitable, but likely to incur the wrath of the chair's owner.

58. Small Luxuries
Those who sit in the skychairs are treated to the best of everything. Satin pillows to rest their heads against, fancy binoculars to see the action better, fine perfumes to wash out the smell of the unwashed masses below, etc. All are fairly valuable and extremely portable.

59. Painted Backdrops
Each scene in each opera performed at the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall has its own masterfully painted backdrop. Each backdrop consists of a twenty foot long roll of canvas painted in oil. When not in use, they are stored either in the cage above the stage or in the storage area. Any disreputable art collector or rival opera house would love to get their hands on one.

-A twenty foot long black canvas of low quality painted with dozens of white dots representing stars and a large white circle representing the moon. The pattern of stars does not correspond to any place or time. This item is used as a background for opera scenes that occur at night. Worth 400 gp.

-A twenty foot long canvas painted with the image of a hilltop. Distant mountains are visible in the background. The style is minimalistic, with no unnecessary detail. This item was created as the background for the short opera The Last Untertian, a philosophical drama about the last survivor of a destroyed city. Worth 3000 gp.

-A twenty foot long canvas painted to resemble the throne room of a great king, with a marble floor and tremendous carved columns holding up the ceiling. This painting is notable for the skilled use of perspective that creates a three-dimensional image. This item is used as a background for the climactic scene in Judgement Of Hextor, an epic opera currently playing at the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall. Worth 7000 gp.

-A twenty foot long canvas of excellent quality painted with an intricate and complex picture of a vibrant jungle. A truly implausible amount of wildlife is on display here, and all of it has been painted beautifully by someone who has no idea what jungle animals actually look like. Despite the inaccuracies, this is a tremendously impressive work of art. This item was painted by the great artist Ulsen Mirranberg as a background for the introduction to the legendary opera Blinntrenno, but thanks to the deaths of everyone even peripherally involved with said opera it was never used. And it likely never will be, since the script of Blinntrenno was lost. Worth 18 000 gp.

60. Musical Instruments
A wide variety of masterwork musical instruments, normally kept in the orchestra pit or storage area. Players should bear in mind that the innocent musicians who play these instruments generally had to borrow money from their boss in order to buy them. If the instruments go missing, the players go broke.

-A masterwork rosewood violin, with a thin coating of gold leaf and dozens of tiny pearls set into the wood. Worth 800 gp.

-An ordinary-looking violin made by the famous violin maker Andulius. Its quality is amazing, well above that of an ordinary masterwork violin. At the GM's discretion, it may give a bonus to skill checks made with it. Worth 6000 gp.

-A large, imposing double base of masterwork quality carved to resemble a curvy woman with her arms crossed over her chest. The carved hair makes this instrument difficult to hold, as it tends to poke the player in the face. Worth 1250 gp.

-A masterwork flute made entirely of mithril. The unusual material alters the instrument's sound slightly, making it difficult to fit into an orchestra. Worth 900 gp.

-A masterwork oboe made by dwarves. Since dwarves almost never make woodwind or string instruments, this is something of a rarity. Worth 700 gp.

-A saxophone that was created as the result of a bet between a king and an instrument maker. The king bet the instrument maker that he couldn't make a quality instrument out of gold. The instrument maker tried and tried, and eventually managed to make this masterwork saxophone out of electrum, an alloy of gold and silver. The king decided that the instrument maker had cheated by using an alloy and had him put to death. Worth 1700 gp.

-A masterwork trumpet enchanted to be nine times as loud as an ordinary trumpet. May be useful as a weapon, or as a method of communication on noisy battlefields. Worth 4500 gp.

-A masterwork trombone older than most of the languages spoken in the world today. It was found in the tomb of King Lazax of Xyth, which is odd for a couple of reasons. First, King Lazax lived and died long before the trombone was thought to have been invented. Second, the trombone has never been present in the music of Xyth. So it's anyone's guess how this instrument got in there. Worth 7000 gp.

-A huge masterwork tuba painted with the story of Arastor (hero of the opera Falujji), in comic format. The artist is unknown, but quite good. Worth 2000 gp.

-A small bell made of an odd alloy. According to the alchemist Mawlen Drass, this bell has been carefully made to produce "perfect sound" according to scientific principles. Counts as a masterwork instrument. Worth 400 gp.

-A very, very, very large masterwork brass gong. It's about 3 metres in diameter and not at all portable. Worth 900 gp.

-A set of masterwork animal skin drums made by the Makkut people of the south. Although this type of drums is meant to be played only by the shaman of the tribe that makes them, it is popular with northern operas because of its melodious thumping sound. Worth 800 gp

61. Props
The opera house never throws anything away. Old props are just left in boxes in the storage area. While the props are without exception cheap imitations of the objects they represent, they are still quite valuable to other theatres or the occasional obsessed fan.

-A painted wooden rod set with glass gems that looks like the royal sceptre of the Atalian king even in a good light. Used as a prop in numerous operas. Worth 75 gp.

-A black iron cross bristling with spikes. It looks like an incredibly exaggerated version of the crosses used for crucifixion by the Monat Empire. Despite its appearance, this device is not useful for crucifixion. This is because the iron is too thin to support the weight of an adult man. Used as a prop in the climax of the opera Ballwai, where the villainous Monat Emperor threatens the hero with it. Worth 100 gp.

-A great number of knives with a dizzying variety of blade shapes. Some blades are shaped like arrows, some are shaped like fish, and some are shaped like things that we don't have words for. All are blunt and useful only as stage weapons. Worth 2 gp each.

-A large balsa wood chest with a gold-painted frame. The front is set with an impressive and quite effective lock, which is wasteful since the chest is too fragile to remain intact if so much as lifted when full. Intended for use as a prop in plays and operas about adventurers. Worth 125 gp.

-A heavy oak desk that looks like the sort of thing you would find in any office. The only interesting thing about it is that it contains an empty space large enough for a person to hide in. This piece was commissioned by the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall for use in the opera Ballwai. Worth 150 gp.

-A dead tree with the leaves stuck to the branches with tiny beads of wax. A thin coating of wax is also present on the wood itself, preventing water damage. This item is useful as a background element for a play or opera. Worth 20 gp.

-A long piece of snow-white wood carved with bogus occult runes. There is a large chunk of red glass on one end that looks like a source of limitless arcane power. If you ever need to pretend to be a wizard, use this. Worth 200 gp.

-A life-sized painted ceramic statue of an animal. Up close, it clearly isn't alive. But from a distance in a dark room, it looks quite realistic. Until you realize that it isn't moving, of course. Worth 60 gp.

62. Costumes
Same situation as with the props. At DM's discretion, a few suits of functional or even magical armour may be mixed in with the trash.

-Ragged grey clothes like those worn by prisoners on death row. There are numerous tears in the fabric, all of them placed strategically to show off the muscles of the man wearing it. Despite (or because of) its worn appearance, this outfit is the best "escaped convict" costume that money can buy. Worth 400 gp.

-A shiny suit of full plate so heavily ornamented that you can't raise your arms while wearing it. This costume has been used in so many performances at the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall that regulars shout out catcalls whenever someone comes onstage wearing it. Worth 1300 gp, mostly because of how famous it is.

-A simple metal disk enchanted so that it will glow and float behind your head. Very useful if you are playing the role of Pelor in the opera Falujji. Worth 500 gp.

-An extremely large pair of sunglasses. Used in some operas to show that a character is mysterious and foreign. Often paired with a business suit, which looks about as weird to your average peasant as an outfit from a Renaissance Faire looks to us. Worth 40 gp for the glasses, 200 gp for the suit.

-A wig made of human hair. Every theatre company has at least a dozen of these. Worth 10 gp each.

-A fancy robe that looks pretty ratty up close. This was once a fashionable outfit belonging to a rich man, but he threw it away long ago. It has been pressed into use as a "rich person" costume at an opera house. Worth 8 gp.

-A striped fur jumpsuit with cat ears, worn by the actor playing the tiger that eats Jeccinea in the opera Falluji. Although it doesn't make you look remotely like a tiger, it is quite beautiful. And since most of the audience of an average opera has never seen a tiger, beauty is preferred to realism. Worth 600 gp.

-A black cloak with a black mesh covering the facial area. Used to represent wraiths on stage. Worth 5 gp.

-An odd costume used in opera. It consists of a cloth-covered suit of armour sized for an ogre that has been repainted to resemble the skin of an earth elemental. This is possibly the least comfortable costume ever worn by an opera performer, so it is generally given to low-ranking apprentices. Worth 700 gp.

63. Cosmetics
You didn't think the actors looked that good naturally, did you? While the opera house tends to cut corners on many things, they've spared no expense when it comes to makeup. If properly applied, these cosmetics may provide a bonus to disguise checks and social skills.

64. Stars
The stars on the doors of the private change rooms are priceless status symbols. And like all priceless things, there are many people out there who will eagerly put a price on them - and maybe even pay it.

65. Personal Items
Stars have stalkers. Anything that they have touched can qualify as treasure. Even a used handkerchief. It might be little difficult to prove that it's genuine, though.

66. Mirrors
Actors love to look at themselves, and so the change room is absolutely filled with mirrors. Made of polished silver or burnished brass, with carved frames of gold or darkwood, these mirrors are some of the most beautiful things in the house. Be careful when transporting the mirrors, as even a tiny scratch will devalue them enormously.

-A palm-sized steel disk that opens up to reveal a silvered glass mirror of exceptional quality. If you need a portable mirror, this is the best you'll get without magic. Worth 300 gp.

-A tall, wide stone pillar with a coating of polished brass that acts as a mirror. The curvature of the pillar creates small but noticeable distortions in the reflected images. These pillars are often found in the dressing rooms of theatres, large clothing stores, and other places where large numbers of people need to see themselves. Worth 150 gp.

-A polished silver wall mirror with an ornamental darkwood frame. Said frame has been carved to resemble thousands of tiny skulls and bones. Each carved skull has two shiny silver beads for eyes. Worth 250 gp.

-A large mirror of silvered glass mounted on a rotating frame of gilded iron. This sort of mirror is popular among high society ladies and successful actors because it provides a clear reflection of the whole body from an adjustable angle. Worth 600 gp

67. Carpet
The carpet on the second basement floor may look ordinary, but it's a genuine antique. It won't be easy to remove it from the floor without damage.

An extremely boring but extremely valuable carpet. To the untrained eye, it's just an ordinary grey wool carpet. To the trained eye, it's an 800 year old Aktan Empire prayer mat made from eight different varieties of grey wool from eight different extinct sheep breeds woven together with the fiendishly difficult Assmu-Dathop weaving technique in a pattern defined by a mathematical equation of great scientific significance. Worth 7500 gp.

68. Paintings
The paintings on the walls of the second basement aren't masterpieces, but they're all pretty good. Suggested subjects include: a still life featuring musical instruments, a vampire about to bite the throat of young girl, the climactic scene of the opera Falujji (in which the hero demands that Pelor return his lost love), and a landscape showing a black castle on a hill against a stormy sky.

69. Sculptures
Like the paintings, the sculptures in the second basement are of fairly high quality. Suggested subjects include: unpainted marble busts of the great composer Rael and the great playwright Shaan, a diorama showing the opera Gintad in progress, and a life-sized painted marble statue of the villain in a "king of the world" pose.

-An unpainted life-sized marble bust of the great composer Rael, who drowned in wine after a king's attempt to congratulate him on the success of the opera Falluji (which Rael composed the music for) went terribly awry. Worth 400 gp.

-An unpainted life-sized marble bust of great playwright Makak Shaan. Shaan was extremely ugly and terribly ashamed of his appearance, and so campaigned to have all images of his face destroyed. As such, statues of him are rare and quite valuable. Worth 1050 gp.

-A fine wooden diorama showing the opera Gintad in progress. That's what it says on the plaque, anyway. It's impossible to tell if it's true, since there is no known opera named Gintad. Worth 120 gp.

-A life-sized painted marble statue of the BBEG. His arms are outstretched as if to embrace the world. Superficially attractive, but upon closer inspection shows a deeply flawed impression of human bodily proportions and bone structure. Worth 50 gp, which is less than the value of the stone used to make it. For some reason, low-quality self-glorifying statues of terrible evil people don't sell very well.

70. Really Nice Fountain Pen
An incredibly fancy, incredibly overadorned pen made mostly of gold. The cap is engraved with a monogram that is clearly not the villain's. If the players do a little research, they'll find that the pen originally belonged to someone the villain killed a long time ago. The original owner's next of kin would very much like it back.
70a. Really Nice Fountain Pen

An incredibly fancy, incredibly overadorned fountain pen made mostly out of gold. The cap is engraved with the monogram of Sallak Vi Demna, a powerful noble who disappeared years ago. The Vi Demna family would very much like it back, and they're willing to pay 4000 gp for it.

71. Blueprints
The winch and pulley system that moves the props and skychairs in the opera house is a masterpiece of engineering. There are many who would very much like to see the plans from which they were made. Two copies of said plans currently exist: one in a secret drawer in the boss's desk and the other under a floorboard in the winch room.

Blueprints for an elaborate winch and pulley system currently in use at the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall. Said system is extremely sophisticated and its design would be very interesting to any engineer. Worth 3500 gp

72. Blackmail Material
The youngest daughter of House Denna has a passion for theatre. About two years ago, she disguised herself as a commoner actress and took to the stage herself. Scandalously improper behaviour for a noble lady, and the sort of thing that destroys reputations. The secret drawer in the boss's desk contains proof of this incident.

Papers proving that the youngest daughter of House Denna once took to the stage as an actress. If these were made public, it would be somewhat damaging to the reputation of her house. These papers are worth about 6000 gp either to House Denna or one of their rivals

73. Scripts
The scripts to new operas are kept secret as long as possible in order to prevent other theatres from stealing the act. In theory, all copies of the scripts to the latest shows should be kept locked in a hidden safe in the storage area. In practice, a few are usually left on the floor or benches of the change rooms.

Ragged pieces of low quality paper with the scripts of operas written on them. Each page contains everything that a single performer needs to know and no more. Despite their poor condition, these papers are protected jealously by the theatres that possess them. One of the main ways that opera houses compete is by stealing or one-upping each other's acts, so scripts are like weapons in the battles between the theatres. Each page is worth about 200 gp, although more than one is required to get the entire script of an opera.

74. Musical Scores
Same story as the scripts. You can often find a supposedly secret musical score on the floor of the orchestra pit.

Ragged pieces of low quality paper with the scores of opera music written on them. Each page contains everything that a single performer needs to know and no more. Despite their poor condition, these papers are protected jealously by the theatres that possess them. One of the main ways that opera houses compete is by stealing or one-upping each other's acts, so pieces of music are like weapons in the battles between the theatres. Each page is worth about 200 gp, although more than one is required to get the entire script of an opera.

75. Legal Documents

Deeds of sale, insurance records, and other boring documents. With these and a bit of luck, you might be able to claim ownership of the entire hall. Failing that, you could sell them. Secrets are always valuable.

These pretentious forms declare the ownership of the Duke Don Paulo Ortega Memorial Hall. They also contain a complete record of that famous place's finances. While the person who holds these papers is technically the owner of the entire hall, players who try to claim it legally will likely run into trouble. They would probably be better advised to sell them for 2000 gp or so.

So there you have it. One opera hall, suitable for any vampire-led criminal organization.

PS. If your players don't realize that something is valuable, you should probably let them make an appraise or knowledge check to realize otherwise. You don't want their wealth falling too low, after all.

Props, Costumes, Small Luxuries: Less than 100gp each, often much less. However, there are a lot of props, costumes, and small luxuries in the building.

Cosmetics, Mirrors: A couple hundred gp apiece. Easy to sell in small quantities but difficult to move in bulk.

Paintings, Sculptures, Carpets: Five hundred to a thousand gp each. You'll probably have to commission an art dealer to sell them.

Musical Instruments, Fancy Pen, Pimped Out Skychairs: Anywhere from a few hundred gp to twenty thousand. You have a lot of leeway with this one.

Documents, Backdrops: A few hundred gp for the scripts and musical scores, a few thousand for the blueprints, legal documents, and blackmail papers. The final price should vary greatly depending on how well the players go about selling the merchandise. If they're clever, they might be able to engineer a bidding war to drive the price up.

[Bullet06320]

Part 3 of Sanctaphrax list



76. White War Paint
The traditional war paint of the Makkut people of the deep south. Properly applied, it connects the eyes, nose, and mouth with pure white lines. Of course, hardly anyone applies it properly. Many rich people cover themselves in elaborate geometric designs with this paint. Costs 200 gp for a small bottle containing enough paint for three dozen proper applications or one fancy one.

77. Kaleidoscope Eye Serum
A complex drug valued for its cosmetic effects. When injected into the bloodstream it causes the whites of the eyes to become slightly more liquid. The eyeballs can then be dyed in the same way as hair. Very popular among criminals who want to look scary while they show off their wealth. Worth 25 gp per dose. Side effects may include addiction, itching, infection, muscle spasms, myopia, internal bleeding, blindness, and death.

78. Wrinkler
A massage oil used mainly by actors and masters of disguise. When rubbed into the skin it causes the skin to dry out and wrinkle. A jar costs 300 gp but lasts for hundreds of applications.

79. Babyface
A massage oil that is in many ways the opposite of Wrinkler. It revitalises the skin, making the user look younger. For obvious reasons, just about every upper class woman has a few jars in her powder room. Each jar contains enough oil for half a dozen applications and sells for 60 gp. In truth, it's only worth a tenth of that. But the Duke of Oassad has a monopoly and he intends to use it.

80. Essence of Ashes
A fashionable perfume that smells of burnt rowan wood. Both men and women of the Atalian court wear it proudly. Each vial is good for seven days of use and costs 500 gp. This price is inflated, and will only last as long as court fashions do.

81. Essence of Flowers
Your everyday standard flowery perfume. Hundreds of different varieties are available, ranging in price from 5 gp/vial to 1000 gp/vial. All geniune Essence of Flowers perfumes come from the Zzxs and Sons perfumery in Gebbengaum, as does Essence of Ashes.

82. Actress's Dye
Hair dye, plain and simple. No true lady would ever admit to using it, given its association with actresses, prostitutes, and other unsavoury people. Usually 10 gp/bottle, but can be much more for certain colours.

83. Bottled Scars
A diluted acid that leaves marks on the skin closely resembling battle scars. Generally mixed with painkillers before sale, so that you don't have to be tough in order to look tough. Popular among street thugs and rich young men who would vehemently deny that they had a sheltered upbringing. A single bottle is good for an inch long knife scar and sells for 35 gp.
One effect of using unusual treasure is that the players have to put a whole lot more effort into looting. This post is for the groups that enjoy this. I hope your players are ready to take apart the floor and sell it.

84. Stained Glass Windows
Large panels of coloured glass assembled to form a picture. When light passes through, the picture is projected onto the ground. Commonly found in churches and temples, these windows often depict religious scenes. Each window is worth at least 150gp, more if the artist is well known or long dead.

85. Black Marble Floor Tiles
You can't keep priceless paintings in a room with an unfinished stone floor. You need something a bit classier. Something like these square slabs of gold-veined black marble. These tiles are normally laid in a very specific arrangement so that the natural patterns of gold and marble are preserved. Each 50 cm long tile is worth 75 gp. Getting the heavy slabs off the floor and transporting them without destroying the pattern should be quite a challenge.

86. Painted Walls
Not all walls are barriers; some walls are art. These walls are made of paper and painted with geometric patterns or fine calligraphy. Although the painted walls are less then a millimeter thick and very light, they are quite difficult to transport because of their size and the fact that any folding will leave permanent marks. You could cut them up, but that would reduce the price greatly. An ordinary painted wall is two meters tall, nine meters long, weighs one kilogram, and sells for 1500gp.

87. Fireplace of Kings
This magnificent hearth consists of an enormous iron cradle set into a wall around a huge brazier of polished bronze. A cunningly designed system of pipes channels wood chips and lamp oil to the brazier, which burn bright enough to warm and illuminate any great hall. Tiny glass prisms attached to the iron cradle gleam like tiny rainbows when the fire burns. The fireplace is worth about 15 000 gp total, but much of that is for the pipes that move the fuel and the chimney that vents the smoke.

88. Porcelain Washroom
This room is so white and so pristine that actually using it seems wrong somehow. It contains a toilet, sink, bathtub, and medicine cabinet, all made entirely out of porcelain. Running water is available. If the players manage to sell what's in this room, they could probably get 9000 gp in all. Unfortunately, since they're bulky, fragile, and reliant upon a source of running water, the contents of the room are not easily moved. The players are probably better off moving in.

89. Archmage's Shelves
An absolutely colossal set of darkwood shelves, with airtight panels of reinforced glass on the front to keep out the elements and heavy adamantine locks on the panels to keep out thieves. These shelves are used in religious archives and the libraries of archmages. A full unit is easily worth 20 000gp, but since each unit is about six meters tall and twelve meters long they aren't often resold. Each unit comes with a wheeled ladder used for reaching the top shelves.

90. Dentures
Most people wouldn't want to lose their teeth, but they might change their mind if they saw these. Each tooth is a teardrop-shaped diamond set into a frame of solid gold. They diamonds are not flawless, but who's going to notice? Worth 8000 gp.

91. Drinking Horn
The tip of an elephant's tusk was chopped off and hollowed out to make this elegant drinking horn. The sides are decorated with runes cast in brass. A heavy rubber stopper and shiny brass cap is also available. Worth 650 gp.

92. Dragonskin Outfit
An entire outfit made entirely out of the hide of a young green dragon. The set consists of a tuxedo, a coat, a top hat, boots, and gloves. May or may not act as a suit of armour that provides considerable protection against acid, but it's definitely stylish and unique. Worth 17 000 gp.

93. Deceiver's Box
This is at first glance an ordinary wooden box. Closer inspection reveals a number of secret compartments, some with very sophisticated locks. Boxes like these often belong to spies and those targeted by spies. Worth 110 gp.

It occurred to me recently that we don't have nearly as much jewellery as one would expect on this thread. Jewellery is often boring, but it doesn't have to be.

94. Jewellery Box

A moderately sized box of worn granite, slightly wider at the top than at the bottom. The lid and the only opening are at the top. Several granite trays of varying size devide the interior into several compartments. The box is worth roughly 30 gp, not including its contents.

The box contains several dozen pieces of jewellery. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the collection, as if the collector simply grabbed whatever shiny things he came across. This collection is most likely the result of a long career in the corpse-looting business.

The contents of the box may include:

A thin gold chain designed to connect a pierced ear to a pierced nose. 45 gp.
A gaudy copper hatpin embossed with the holy symbol of Olidramma. 5 gp.
A dozen small amber teardrops attached to a simple leather thong. 150 gp.
A circular steel bracelet with an inch-long blade extending from the sides. It is impossible to put on. 2 gp.
A heavy platinum belt buckle shaped like a skull. 600 gp.
A long belt of black leather, studded with small diamonds. 250 gp.
A round gold medallion with a smiley face pattern picked out on the front in beads of jet. 475 gp.
A colourful hairnet made of dyed cotton interwoven with very thin copper wires. 35 gp.
An ankle bracelet made of small squares of green jade connected by a silk cord. 300 gp.
A ring of white wood set with an exquisitely carved glass snowflake. 50 gp. 1250 gp to a druid.
A ring of green wood set with a beautifully coloured glass flower. 50 gp. 1250 gp to a druid.
A ring of yellow wood set with a masterfully crafted glass sun. 50 gp. 1250 gp to a druid.
A ring of brown wood set with expertly arranged glass leaves. 50 gp. 1250 gp to a druid.
A ring of black wood with an inscription in Druidic along the edges. 4 sp. 5000 gp to a druid.
A pair of brass bracelets, each decorated with a pair of golden wings. 150 gp total.
A pair of emerald cufflinks, the silver mounting black with age. 500 gp.
A headband set with a huge colourless crystal of unknown type. 2000 gp.

Let me warn you before you read this that none of the ideas in this post are original. All of them are simply minor rewrites of items posted to the 1001 Art Objects thread, which has been dead for over a year. 95-106

95. Brain in a Jar
A human brain suspended in greenish liquid inside a sealed glass jar. The ends of the jar are made of polished wood studded with tiny pearls. Worth 7500 gp, but only an illithid would buy it.

96. Potion Bottle
A small hollow ivory cone with a ruby stopper at the narrow end. It contains a magical potion. Worth 150 gp for the cone and 100 gp for the stopper, plus more for the potion inside.

97. Glasses
A pair of square-lensed universal prescription eyeglasses with ten karat gold frames. Comes with a small carrying case made from rare extraplanar wood. The glasses and case together will cost you 3000 gp.

98. Dwarf King's Pipe
A tabacco pipe that appears to be made of solidified darkness. It features prominently in several local legends about its former owner, dwarven king Ulat Shadowhammer. It could be worth anywhere from 750-7500 gp, depending on who you sell it to.

99. Gemstone Eggs
A collection of transparent glass objects the size and shape of chicken eggs. The center of each egg contains a precious gem about the size of a woman's pinkie fingertip. The collection of all 12 eggs with their labelled display stand is worth 15 000 gp.

100. Ornamental Scabbard
A sheath for a long sword that is made out of thin metal covered in white leather that has been decorated with gold in complex geometric patterns in the style of early elven anti-realists. Worth 900 gp.

101. Umber Hulk Head
The severed head of an Umber Hulk. It's been stuffed and mounted carefully so that the pincers are still movable. The eyes have been replaced with multicoloured opals of great size. It'll cost you 500 gp.

102. Walking Stick
A shaft of ivory a little over a meter long with a handle carved into the shape of an elephant's head. The ears and tusks stick out a ways, giving the stick a very distinctive profile. The stick is worth about 1500 gp.

103. Holy Symbol
A small piece of ruby-studded gold molded into a shape that represents a long-dead god. Historians and theologians would find it very, very interesting. Worth 4000 gp.

104. Fighting Bookends
A pair of painted marble bookends depicting a tiefling mage and a dragonborn warrior. The mage is posed as if casting a spell and the warrior's shield is breaking. Worth 300 gp.

105. Scales
A set of jeweller's scales decorated with gold filigree and small sapphires. While the scales are beautiful, their true value lies in their extraordinarily fine balance. They come with a set of platinum ingots, each of which weighs exactly one carat. The scales are worth 2 000 gp and the ingots are collectively worth 1 000 gp.

106. Dragon Kite
A huge silk and balsa wood kite designed to look almost exactly like a young adult red dragon. Flying on a windy day, it resembles the real thing closely enough to create a panic. It is worth at least 20 000 gp not because of the value of the materials, but because of the amazing amount of skill and effort that went into its construction.
I like this idea. Here's my take on an airship as treasure.

107. Aerostat

This magnificent airship consists of a cylindrical cabin roughly 40 metres in diameter and 6 metres in height, hanging beneath several dozen hydrogen-filled gas bags.

The cabin of the blimp is made of light wood attached to an iron/mithril alloy frame. It is divided into three floors, each with numerous rooms. The outside rim contains the control, machinery, and weapon rooms. Further inside, the aerostat has private quarters on the top floor, public areas on the middle floor, and storage space on the bottom floor.

The gas bags that keep the aerostat in the air are made entirely out of platinum. This is both really impressive to look at and an excellent way to keep the hydrogen inside the gas bags. Since even thin sheets of metal are fairly rigid, the bags hold their shape well. The builders of the aerostat have taken advantage of this to give the bags the shapes of various polygons. This is not very efficient, but it looks good.

The exterior of the cabin is coated in smoked glass. This allows those inside to see out without allowing others to see in. Some parts of the glass surface can be moved to reveal either clear glass windows for unobstructed vision or weapon ports for unobstructed shooting.

The aerostat moves up and down by taking in and letting out compressed air from the surrounding atmosphere. The devices and storage tanks required to do this are located on the outer rim of the bottom floor. If they are damaged, the ship will float helplessly.

Under normal circumstances, the ship carries enough supplies to support fifty people for about one and a half months. The ship is capable of remaining airborne for much longer than that, of course.
I re-read the Sandman story "Ramadan" recently, and found it inspirational. Lots of great treasure ideas in there. Everything in this post is from that story, although I have made a few changes to certain items.

108. Golden Key
Beneath the great palace of Haroun Al Raschid there are many magnificent treasures, sealed behind great doors of iron, bronze, wood, and fire. Each of these doors, although normally impregnable, my be opened with the same simple golden key. Naturally, this key is quite valuable. You could probably sell it for 20 000 gp, but you will certainly be killed if Haroun Al Raschid gets wind of it. You might be better off returning it to him and hoping for a reward.

109. Broken Globe Of Sealing
There was once a great king and wizard by the name of Sulaiman Ben Daoud. Near the end of his life, he captured 9009 powerful evil spirits and bound them into a globe of red crystal. He marked this globe with his seal and hid it away so that the spirits within could never be released.

Of course, it didn't work. Some idiot came along and smashed the globe, releasing the spirits into the world. The shattered pieces of the globe are still worth a lot, though. Some churches, museums, and wizards would pay as much as 13 000 gp for them.

110. The Other Egg Of The Phoenix
When the legendary creature called the phoenix dies, it lays two eggs. One of these eggs is white, the other is black. It is known the phoenix itself hatches from the white egg, but no one knows what hatches from the black one. The black egg is worth 9000 gp to anyone who wants to find out.

111. City In A Bottle
A bottle roughly 60 cm tall and 25 cm wide. It contains a fantastically detailed, incredibly beautiful scale model of a city so glorious that all real cities seem like pale reflections. Legend has it that the city in this bottle is in fact a real city, sold to the Lord Of Dreams so that it would last forever.

Regardless of the truth of the legend, this bottle is the most beautiful thing that most people will ever see in their lives. It's worth at least 75 000 gp.

112. Winged Horse
A sculpture of a miniature pegasus, about 30 cm tall at the shoulder. The winged horse is made entirely of glass, save for the bone eyes. It flew once, long ago, but has not done so since that day. Worth 3500 gp, or perhaps more if you can get it to fly again.
All right, I'm starting to run out of ideas. I would appreciate any and all suggestions and requests.

113. Gilded Skeleton
The skeleton of a healthy being of average physical characteristics mounted on a hinged metal frame for posability and coated with an incredibly thin layer of gold leaf. The eye sockets contain globes of polished red glass. Good for research doctors with a sense of style. Necromancers sometimes use skeletons like this as soldiers when they want to make a statement. They leave the frame off, of course. Worth 300 gp for a human adult, more for some other varieties (eg: ogres, dragons, infants).
I can think of a few subjects for pictures off the top of my head. For example:

-A number of colourful birds perched on the branches of a tree
-The sun rising above a snow-capped mountain
-The body of a man, hanging from a noose with his face hidden in shadow
-A huge man with a stag's head, leading a group of mounted hunters in pursuit of a fox
-The god Pelor, reaching down from heaven to pull a drowning man out of the water
-The BBEG standing above the corpses of adventurers, possibly including the PCs
-A still life depicting the leftovers after a feast
-Fifty pairs of huge hands forming fifty symbolic gestures, possibly creating a coded message
-A dozen burning torches held high by people outside the frame
-A king sitting in judgement over a rebellious noble
-A highly idealized depiction of the death of the silver dragon Maelthax at the hands of Gruumsh
-The wizard Faust being dragged into hell by devils
-Six cats with human hands, symbolizing good luck and resourcefulness in some cultures
-A seven year old girl dancing with ribbons in her hands
-The BBEGs wife, sitting in a chair and looking graceful
-An illuminated diagram of the BBEGs family tree
-A famous poem written in huge golden letters
-A stylized map of a faraway land

114. Tombstone
Lines of shining platinum have been inlaid into the back and sides of the stone like veins of ore. Letters of solid gold spell out just about everything anyone would ever want to know about the deceased on the front of the stone. Beneath these letters is a small ivory disk with the sigil of the deceased painted on. This stone is worth roughly 1500 gp, possibly more if it belongs to a well-known historical figure. It cost more the original owner more than that, but tombstones don't have much of a resale value.

115. Sarcophagus
An airtight stone coffin about seven feet long, two feet wide, and two feet tall. The lid has been decorated with an embossed image of the person lying inside as they appeared in the prime of their life. This image has been carefully painted and varnished so that, in the dry air of a properly-constructed crypt, it will last forever. In some ways this is a monument to human vanity, since this image of eternal youth was never meant to be seen by anyone. Although the real value of the sarcophagus is in its historical context and content, it's worth 5000 gp to someone who plans to use it as a fancy box. It may well be possible to ressurect the deceased from what's left inside the sarchophagus.

116. Soul Guard Statue
Atalian superstitions state that demons like nothing better than to violate the bodies of the dead. Carved jade animals are supposed to be able to ward off such demons if placed upon a coffin. These beliefs may in fact be correct. An ordinary jade animal statue will sell for 350 gp, putting them out of the reach of the poor. As such, it is common for these to be stolen from tombs by poor people desperate to protect their dead bodies or thieves just out to make a quick buck.

117. Eulogy
Another common Atalian superstition is that the gods of the dead will condemn a soul to hell unless presented with physical evidence that he deserves better. So it is expected that the family of a dead man will write (or have written) a poem glorifying the life of the deceased. Those without much money will often buy a standard poem containing generic praise from a local church. Such poems cost about 1 gp. Better poetry, custom made for the deceased, starts at 50 gp and goes up. The very best eulogies are worth about 7500 gp.

118. Illuminated Scrolls Of Blastum Widgit
An elaborately ornamented scroll containing the spell Magic Missile. While this scroll is fully functional, its real value is in its decoration. It was created by (the late) Blastum Widgit, an artist and mage famous for the beauty of his scrolls. A collector will pay 2500 gp for it and call it cheap, since there are only five such scrolls still in existence.

119. Executioner's Sword
A masterwork greatsword with an enormous rectangular blade made of black metal. Scenes depicting the justice and glory of the Riont royal house have been painted on the sides of the blade. This sword was made by the great swordsmith Dallin Vi Riont specifically to be used in the execution of Polem Vi Riont, a treasonous prince who killed his father in an attempt to take the throne. This blade is worth 11 000 gp for its historical value and usefulness as a weapon in combat.

120. Urza's Staff
This simple length of iron wire wrapped wood appears worthless at first glance. But a bit of research will reveal that this ordinary-looking stick was once a magical staff of great power, created and used by the great mage and planar traveller Urza. This staff is worth 2000 gp due to its auspicious past, although there is no power left in it.

121. Journal Of A Dragon
A simple paper notebook. A DC 15 Decipher Script check or quick look from someone who can read Draconic will reveal that it contains the journal of a young adult red dragon. The only interesting entry in the book explains how the dragon imagines that the wine he drinks is the blood of his enemies. Worth 600 gp for the sheer novelty value. Of course, this sum probably isn't worth the enmity of the journal's author, who won't be pleased to discover that his private musings are being sold on the open market.

Here's my take on wine as treasure, followed by my take on a few random wine-related items from the underlined section of the list.

122. Wine Collection
An enormous wine rack containing several hundred bottles of wine along with a few harder drinks. The rack itself is just an ordinary unadorned piece of oak wood, but it contains both the cheapest of drinks and the finest. All in all, the collection is worth 30 000 gp. The contents of the rack include:

- One two-thirds full bottle of Ol' Oli's Finest, a wine with a recipe (supposedly) created by the god Olidramma. It is sometimes considered to be the finest wine in the world. If the bottle was full it would be worth 10 000 gp, but with one third of it emptied it's only worth 3 500 gp.
- Half a dozen bottles of Uncle Rad's Cherry Wine, a drink popular among the middle classes of southern Atalia. Each bottle is worth 2 gp.
- Four bottles of Gavin's Honey Apricot Mead, another popular middle-class Atalian drink. Each bottle is worth 5 gp.
- Twenty bottles of Jack's Rotgut Rum, the worst drink you will ever taste. It inflicts a head-breaking hangover each and every time. Despite the terrible quality of this rum, it is extremely popular among hardcore alcoholics and sells for 4 gp/very large bottle.
- Two bottles of Elgwath's Cellars Premium Sunshine, an extremely high-class elven wine that sells for 500 gp/bottle.
- Two bottles of Old Goat Fart #9, an "artistic" brand of absinthe that is valued for its purported positive effect on the creativity of the drinker. Each (tiny) bottle is worth 600 gp.
- One unlabeled bottle of extremely old elven wine. Although it probably tastes like vinegar after all this time, it's still worth a lot by virtue of sheer age and rarity. It'll cost you 7000 gp.
- An enormous number of alcoholic drinks ranging from gnomish beer to draconic vodka. It would be impossible to list a value for each, so just treat them all as a single item with a value of about 16 000 gp.

123. Glasses, Goblets And Bottles
A small cabinet filled with fancy drink containers. It contains several crystal bottles decorated with gold inlay, an amethyst stopper, a dozen fragile crystal cups, and a couple of golden chalices studded with semiprecious stones around the lip. All in all, the collection is worth 1100 gp.

124. Everfull Cup Of Fine Liquor
A simple wooden cup that fills with Elgwath's Cellars Premium Sunshine upon command. It can produce a quantity of wine roughly equal to the contents of two bottles each day. Makes a great gift, but isn't the infinite money machine that it appears to be. After all, selling fine wines isn't easy. Worth 9000 gp.

125. Everfull Cup Of Nasty Grog
A simple wooden cup that fills with Jack's Rotgut Rum upon command. It can produce a quantity of rum roughly equal to the contents of two (very large) bottles each day. This item has a number of uses that are not immediately obvious. Worth 300 gp.

126. Knife Collection

A set of four large glass-faced display cases, each containing dozens of carefully labeled knives. The variety in this collection is astonishing, although none of the knives are magical. The cases, with all their contents, are worth 9500 gp. Some examples of what the cases might contain are:

-A thin stilletto made entirely out of dragonbone, with rubies set into the handle. Very fancy, and actually quite suitable for an assassin. Worth 700 gp.

-A masterwork kukri knife with a blade of the finest, sharpest, Damascus steel. An excellent blade for warriors who don't have access to magical weapons. Worth 550 gp.

-A cheap kitchen knife made of sharpened wood. Knives like this are used as cutlery by peasants. Worth 1 sp.

-An iron dagger with a fish-shaped blade that ends in a forked tail. This sort of knife originates in far-off Lulneni, where they are used by the priesthood in rites involving human sacrifice. Worth 130 gp.

-An ancient butcher knife with a rusty square blade that is edged by a dozen sharp teeth. Probably comes from some dungeon. Worth 5 sp.

-A high-quality medical scalpel made from adamantine that cuts through flesh and bone with disturbing ease. Too small to be used as a weapon, but counts as a masterwork tool for any skill check that involves precise cutting. Worth 400 gp.

-A small bronze blade with intended for cutting paper and opening envelopes. Its sides are etched with runes that no-one can read. Worth 2 gp.

127. Throne Of Skulls
A nine foot tall throne carved out of obsidian. The armrests are exquisitely sculpted to resemble a pile of skulls. The skulls at the top front of the armrests are vastly larger than the others and have massive pearls for eyes. The tob of the throne's backrest has been formed into the shape of a huge, demonic-looking horned skull with extremely sharp teeth. The upper jaw of the horned skull hangs over the rest of the seat. Large, upward-curving spikes extend from the back and sides of the throne, making it dangerous to stand nearby.

Although it looks terribly impractical, this throne is both comfortable and functional. The seat is covered with cushions of the finest, most expensive materials. Wyvern hide, Muskeval skin, and Rakshasa fur cover those cushions, creating an incredibly soft seat. Some of the skulls on the armrests are hollow, and can be used to conceal weapons and other useful things. All that, and it can be yours for just 25 000 gp.
128. Bloodwine

An ordinary wine rack that contains bottles of decidedly extraordinary vintage. Each bottle contains a single litre of blood, with a small paper label describing the species, age, and notable traits of the being from which the blood was taken. The collection as a whole is worth 9000 gp to a vampire, and contains thirty bottles that range in price from 5 gp for the blood of a 42 year old human prostitute to 2500 gp for the blood of a 14 year old half-celestial princess.

129. Red Carpet
A plush red carpet that looks incredibly swanky. It has been enchanted so that when someone walks toward it while it is rolled up, it will unroll for them. If that person walks back, it will roll up behind them. Not all that useful, but very fancy. Worth 150 gp.

130. Villainous Pipe Organ
A pipe organ so fancy and so incredibly evil in appearance as to make Ganondorf or Davy Jones weep in envy. The main body of the organ is darkwood, the chair is cushioned with feather-stuffed black velvet, the keys are made of platinum-coated human bone, and the pipes are made of hollowed-out human spinal columns topped with their former owners' skulls. This magnificent instrument, which would make any BBEG proud, is worth 32 000 gp. Unfortunately, good-aligned adventurers who try to sell this item will find that their only customers will be the people that they should be killing.
Nitpick: the description of the painting called Light is the same as that of the painting called Feast.

131. Recording Mirror
A six foot tall standing mirror made of polished silver. The frame is iron and undecorated apart from an oddly realistic carving of an eyeball mounted above the mirror's center. When a command word is spoken, the eyeball will begin to record everything it sees. A second command word will cause it to stop, and a third will make it replay the most recent recording. Players should be careful when discovering this item, since the most recent recording of a BBEG can be quite disturbing indeed. Worth 3000 gp.

132. Queen's Hair Locket
An ordinary golden locket shaped like a heart that contains a lock of brown hair. The locket itself is worth only 10 gp, and most people would consider the hair worthless. Most people would be wrong, though, since the hair belongs to Queen Mennana of Atalia. Some obsessed fans or sorcerers seeking links to the queen will pay 5000 gp for it.

133. Karaoke Machine
A small stone cube connected to a pebble by an iron chain. Two musician spirits have been bound within the cube. They can communicate verbally, speaking through the cube and listening through the pebble. If asked to do so, one of the spirits will play a song with great skill while the other listens through the pebble for the sound of someone singing along. At the end of each song, the second spirit will rate the performance of the singer (if there is one) on a scale that ranges from 1 to 10. This wondrous object is worth roughly 7000 gp.

134. Pool Full Of Jello
A large round room of unfinished stone approximately 15 metres in radius. The center of the room contains a large round pit with blue ceramic tiles along the sides and bottom. It is about 3 metres deep, and is completely filled with pale blue gelatin harvested from the corpses of numerous oozes. This gelatin is worth 4000 gp in all, but people who have a use for it are few and far between.

135. Mahogany Figurehead
A life-sized masterwork mahogany carving of a girl bound in chains. Her hands cover her face, and she seems to be crying. Sculptures of this sort are often mounted on the bows of ships, but this one is connected to a wall instead. Worth 1100 gp

136. Fire In Our Hands
A famous oil painting by the late, great Marran N. Mict that depicts a dozen disembodied hands holding torches. The style of the painting is odd, and quite different from most of Marran's work. Each hand is composed of dozens of small coloured geometric shapes, while the torches are photorealistic. There has been a great deal of pointless speculation concerning this painting's message. Worth 8000 gp.

137. Royal Duty
A pretty standard painting of a king rendering judgement upon a rebellious noble. Those who know their fictional history will recognize that this painting depicts the sentencing of the notorious usurper Polem Vi Riont. Worth 120 gp.

138. Maelthax
One of Mollani Musqueso's earliest works, this small oil painting shows the death of the silver dragon Maelthax at the hands of the orc god Gruumsh as a 14 year old boy would imagine it. Musqueso was young and not especially skilled when he painted this, but his later triumphs have inflated the price of this work to 3000 gp.

139. Faust's Damnation
One of the most-copied paintings ever. It was painted by the undeservedly obscure Jwan Sinco as a template for the production of illustrated advertisements for the opera Faust. Said illustrated advertisements were then hung up in the houses of numerous peasants who could not afford original art. The subject of this painting is the titular Faust, being dragged into the abyss by Demogorgon at the opera's climax. Although the painting is excellent and extremely well known, its commonplace associations lower the price to 600 gp.

140. Irinimi
A small, highly stylized painting of six cats with human hands. The background is blurry and indistinct, but the cat-creatures (which are known as irinimi) are brightly coloured and beautiful. Irinimi are considered lucky in many cultures, and some would say that a painting like this can only bring good fortune. Worth 250 gp.

141. Elena Dearest
A simple yet well done watercolour painting of a graceful lady. Not high art by a long shot, but quite nice. The only notable thing about this work is its artist, who is your standard empire-ruling necromancer lord. Selling it will get you 75 gp and, since the artist won't be happy, the death of your entire extended family.

142. The Most Glorious And Puissant Lineage Of Tharat
An extremely colourful tapestry that shows the lineage of the illustrious (and evil) Duke Tharat. The bottom of the tapestry is loosely woven to make future additions easy. This ancient heirloom is worth 1200 gp.

143. Mollon Ot Sik
Mollok Ot Sik, which means "Here I Stand," is a famous poem about courage and the way of the warrior. This silver-coated bronze plate has been decorated with the full text of the poem in inch-high letters of gold. One of these plates was given to each of the knights who fought for King Pyrn in the Battle Of Krana forty years ago, which was cheaper than it sounds since all but three of Pyrn's knights died in that battle. The plates have become a symbol of courage and honour since then, and each is worth 6000 gp.

144. The Isle Of Tmoy
An innacurate map of a place that doesn't exist. This work was part of the Elven Anti-Realism movement, which rejected all notions of objective truth. While useless as a map, The Isle Of Tmoy is an artistic masterpiece and an interesting piece of art history. It's worth 2300 gp.

145. Dance Of Ribbons
A tremendously detailed, very realistic masterwork ink drawing of a little girl dancing with ribbons in her hands. It's hard to look at it without feeling cheerful. Worth 120 gp

146. Automatic Window
A huge pane of apparently-ordinary glass in a frame of burnished silver. It's about two metres high and four metres wide. It has been enchanted to split in half, swing outwards, and hang open whenever something comes within two metres, which makes it useful as a door as well as a window. One should be careful with this item, as it isn't any more durable than an ordinary window. Worth 650 gp.

147. Awesome Pipe
A masterwork pipe carved entirely from the finest hobgoblin pipeweed. The pipeweed is enchanted so that it will grow into the bowl piece and in doing so create a limitless supply of tobacco. A tiny ooze has been bound into the wood and trained to eat the burnt residue of the tobacco, ensuring a clean hit every time. This marvellous device is worth roughly 5000 gp to any wealthy nicotine addict.

148. Steampunk Dishwasher
A large brass box with a glass front. Strange knobs, dials, and buttons adorn the top, hinting at some mysterious purpose. Those who move aside the glass front will see that the interior contains a number of oddly shaped racks and notches. Those who press the correct buttons in the correct sequence will see that the box contains strange nonmagical devices which bathe everything inside in steam. This device was originally intended to wash dishes, but it has recently been pressed into service as an implement of torture. An artificer seeking new knowledge might pay as much as 11 000 gp for this wondrous object.

149. Golden Chargers
A dozen golden charger plates etched in ivory and mother-of-pearl. The workmanship is excellent but the gold is far from pure. The plates are worth 800 gp in all, far less than one might expect from their appearance.

150. Celestial Oak Wood
Wood from a variant of oak tree that grows only in the Seven Mounting Heavens. It's a beautiful golden colour, and stronger than iron. The church of Pelor uses it to make armour and weapons for the elite Order Of The Silver Dawn. 300 gp will get you enough of this for a longsword.

151. Scentsteel
A type of steel that has been modified through obscure alchemical processes that cause it to emit a minty fresh smell. The value of this becomes clear once you've smelled the aftermath of a major battle. A kilogram of this metal sells for 400 gp, and it would be much more if not for a price war between the two groups of alchemists that know how to produce it.

152. Crystallized Starlight
A gemstone that forms when light from the north star falls onto the same patch of still water every night for a year. In order for that to occur, the weather must be almost impossibly tranquil. But when it does occur, it tends to form an awful lot of crystallized starlight at once.

Inevitably, that leads to a local crisis as fortune-seekers descend on the area to make their fortunes. But who can blame them? A pea-sized chunk of crystallized starlight is worth 700 gp, more than most peasants will see in their lives.

153. Marble Statue
A black marble statue roughly five feet tall. It depicts a soldier in hoplite armour, with a spear planted firmly into the ground. The soldier's armour is coated with gold leaf, and his eyes have been painted to look real. The overall effect is quite impressive, but the soldier's face is poorly carved and so the statue is only worth 500 gp.

154. Solid Gold Idol
A rather small but very heavy golden idol shaped like a chubby woman with a raven's head. According to the beliefs of the long-dead Iptat people, this statue wards off the evil spirits that cause stillbirths. Even if you don't care about the Iptat or their beliefs, this idol should be valuable to you because it is made out of 700 gp worth of pure gold.

155. Statuette (silver)
A one-inch tall statue of Queen Meo made of the purest silver. The details almost unbelievably fine, with each individual hair carved separately. This could not have been made by human hands. It would be a great treasure that men would kill to own, if only Queen Meo had not been disgraced in an adultery scandal last year. But she was, so you'll be lucky to get 1500 gp for this amazing work of art. Perhaps in a far-off land where Queen Meo is not hated (or even known) it could be sold for more.

156. Statuette (gold with 500 gp gems) 2500 gp
An eight-inch statuette that depicts a wizard with two magical staffs. The wizard's skin and clothes were coated with gold leaf by the statuette's previous owner, which actually made the piece less attractive because it now lacks any semblance of fine detail. Regardless, each of the wizard's staffs is still set with a flawless emerald, which makes the value of the piece undeniable. These emeralds would be worth 500 gp apiece if they were removed from the statue, which is worth 2500 gp with them or 250 gp without them.
Anyway, it's time for mathematical treasure.

157. Ivory Abacus
A small rectangular abacus carved from the tusk of a mammoth. Its beads are made of ivory from that same tusk, strung on wires of mammoth hair. It's not all that pretty, but it is useful: it can be used to make mathematical calculations at an extraordinary speed, vastly increasing the efficiency of a mathematician. The abacus itself is only worth 20 gp or so, but the knowledge of abacus construction and use is worth at least 10 000 gp. After all, it could revolutionize the world of tax-gatherers and other such people. Of course, there's no guarantee that someone who finds this device will understand it.

158. Magic Squares
Magic squares (numbers arranged on a square grid so that the rows, columns, and diagonals add up to the same thing) are often held to have mystical properties. The priests of the craft-god Arop-Sak subscribed wholeheartedly to that belief, which undoubtedly led them to create these items.

Each of these 12 black stone slabs is about a foot square, and each of them has on one side a 4x4 magic square inscribed in gold leaf. The numbering system is archaic, but most sages will recognize it. Some of the wealthier of said sages (and some churches) would be willing to pay approximately 120 gp for each of these items, since there is great demand for new magic squares among some religions. Plus, they look nice.
159. Robe Of Faces

A heavy robe made of colourful woollen threads woven together to make pictures of human faces. Some of the faces look happy, others look angry, others look afraid. All of them are much more realistic than one would expect from pictures made of wool. This dress was made by the great, but utterly forgotten, tapestry maker Als Mlakan. Costs 100 gp and cheap for that price.

160. Belt Chain
A light golden chain that serves as a belt. The ends of the chain are clasps that look like the ones on handcuffs, but the chain is much too weak to restrain anyone because it's thin and because it's actually solid gold. Although useless as a tool of imprisonment, this chain is a fantastic way to keep your pants up. Worth 150 gp because it contains as much gold as 150 gold pieces.

161. Glass Mask
A blank mask of one-way glass, padded on the inside with silk. It utterly conceals its wearer's features behind a featureless dome while letting them see clearly. Since making one-way glass is not within the abilities of most modern societies, this item is almost completely unique. Worth roughly 900 gp.

162. Bottles Of Air
A dozen small glass bottles, all apparently empty. Magical analysis would reveal that they contain air of surpassing purity, air so perfect that it could never occur naturally in any mortal world. A single sniff of this perfect air fills one's heart with joy and makes it clear that life is a wonderful thing. This can be addictive, and so there exists a pretty decent market for air like this. Once the authenticity of the bottles has been proved, each will sell for 500 gp.

163. Box Of Rocks
A large wooden chest, filled with labeled glass boxes. Each box contains rocks of a different type, and every rock in the chest originates from some far-off world. One glass box contains blood-red granite from the Abyss, another contains pulsating geodes from the Positive Energy Plane, while yet another contains oddly sinister gravel from the bottom of the River Styx. The individual boxes range in value from 50 to 500 gp, and the contents of the chest as a whole are worth 5000gp.

164. Extraplanar Geology: A Practical Guide
The last remaining work of an obscure wizard who travelled the planes a very long time ago. It provides a basic explanation of how the various worlds differ geologically. There are lists of rocks from every plane, diagrams of how various worlds look underground, and descriptions of how the rocks it describes are formed and destroyed. It frequently apologizes for explaining things incompletely, and directs its readers to more complete academic works no less than eighty-three times. Those more complete academic works no longer exist. While extraplanar geology is rather obscure, this tome nonetheless represents a wealth of knowledge and so it is worth 1000gp.

165. Dragon Skeleton
The skeleton of the red dragon Alratax, mounted on an iron frame that approximates the shape of Alratax's living body. It's about 5 metres tall at the shoulder. The skeleton is both an awe-inspiring monument and a great aid to anybody interested in studying draconic anatomy, but its true value comes from the usefulness of dragonbone as a material and from the distant possibility that Alratax could be ressurected with it. It's worth roughly 9000 gp

166. Hot Sauce
A small glass bottle filled with red liquid. The cap resembles a tiny eye-dropper. The red liquid inside the bottle is tremendously spicy, to the point that it's actually dangerous. Which stands to reason, since it was created by an alchemist seeking to distill pure capascin for use as a weapon. Despite that alchemist's intentions, the liquid is primarily useful as a food additive. After all, you can only weaponize it once. But if you add it to your food, you can make every dish you eat spicy for a year before you run out of sauce. A wealthy chef might pay as much as 550 gp for this.

167. Stone Idol

A large rock shaped vaguely like a human face. It hasn't been carved, it's just naturally face-like. Two large opals have been set into the stone where one would expect eyes, and the mouth-like crack in the rock is full of ivory shards that look quite a bit like teeth. The rock isn't exactly pretty, but it's quite valuable because it's sacred to the Nomu cult. They use it and other rocks like it to represent their god when they perform rituals, and they'd be willing to pay 1100 gp to have it returned to them if it were lost or stolen somehow. If the opals were removed from the rock its religious value would disappear, but the opals could be sold for 300 gp each.

168. Box Of Teeth
A rusty iron box filled with teeth from all kinds of creatures, taken as trophies by someone who's done a lot of killing. There are wolf teeth and bear teeth, shark teeth and human teeth. There are elf teeth and dragon teeth and angel teeth and demon teeth. Roughly ten kilograms of teeth in all.

Most of the teeth are worthless, but some would make good jewelry and some have magical applications. So you could probably sell the contents of the box for 300 gp.

169. Silver Puppet
A small humanoid figure made from silver and dangling from strings. It has a face, of sorts, with little chips of onyx for eyes and a tiny rectangular hole for a mouth. The strings are silk threads attached to a pair of silver sticks, which can be manipulated to make the puppet move quite intricately.
It's a silly toy, but it's made of silver and it's pretty well-crafted. It would probably fetch 75 gp if sold.

170. Wearable Tapestry
A sweater woven from multi-coloured wool. The weave is extremely intricate, and displays an story of sorts. Black wool divides it into rectangular sections, and within those rectangular sections there are wool-pattern images showing the life and times of a farm boy who grew up to slay a dragon and rule a kingdom. Actually wearing this sweater might not be a good idea, as you'd risk damaging it. Its extremely fine craftsmanship and sheer novelty make it worth 500 gp.

171. Magical Piercings
Three silver bars, each with a sapphire set into each end. One of the bars is a foot long, while the other two are only about as long as a finger is wide. When pressed into flesh, the bars pass directly through without resistance or harm. When they are removed, they leave no mark. As such, they allow their wearers to display body-piercing jewelry without any danger or pain. The two smaller bars are generally worn through the ears or nose, while the larger bar is normally worn through the head or chest. The large bar is worth 1500 gp, while the two smaller ones are worth 300 gp each.

[Bullet06320]

Various postings



Statue or Painting: Unpriced. BBEG in a dominating position of superiority, with an old foe (or the PC group) in a submissive or defeated posture before him. Does take some time to complete. Likeness of the BBEG is very good, other individuals are recognizable.
For a modest additional fee, statue or painting can be magically put into motion. Motion sequence must be cyclical. For instance, foes may bow and scrape before you but we cannot make their heads be cut off and cast aside.

A Demonic hookah, made to resemble a Marlith. Instead of weapons, each arm serves as a holder for one of six bejewled hoses, and her coiled tail is the water bowl. Each of the scales is a finely cut and highly polished gem, and her upper body is pure Mithral, painted with realistic enamels. Her removable head serves as the tobacco chaimber. Each of the six hoses is made to resemble one of the weapons a Marlith would normally carry, and each is made of solid gold and encrusted with a different set of gems in the hilt/handle. Depending on the type of gems used, this piece could sell for as much as 50,000 - 100,000 GP or more.




Don't know if this has been hit upon yet or not, but during the Renaissance, a highly prized piece of artwork were ornatmental instruments. Lutes, guitars, harpsichords, de gambas, and other stringed instruments were designed more for art than practical performance. They featured highly ornate designs and inlays, were made of the finest woods, and had decorations of gems, diamonds, inlay gold, etc, etc. Many featured designs depicting scenes or had mosiac work of wood in one the body of intricate flower and knot work patterns.

Its a bit of real world history injected in to DnD and adds a big of high culture to any BBEG




A hardcover first edition of Evil for Dummies. Contains tips and tricks for domination, whether you want to take over the village next door or the entire world. Crushing enemies and slaughtering innocents is easy when you're a lich with 26 INT. Here's a guide for the rest of us! Signed by author. - 150 gp

A set of paintings by the BBEG, mostly portraits. While he/she is unknown as an artist, the quality is excellent. - 200-350 gp apiece.

A large, well-done painting of Heironeous, in a solid gold picture frame. You suspect the moustache and goatee were not the work of the original artist. - 500 gp

A sword made of flawless glass with a gilded hilt, enchanted to be as hard as steel. Masterwork quality. - 1,200 gp

A set of labwear for magical experiments previously owned by a legendary mage. - 2,000 gp

A large gilded leather bound book entitled Demonology for Advanced Students. Contains detailed anatomies and diagrams of various demons and demonic entities, as well as tips on combat tactics, bargaining tricks, and summoning spells for use on demons. In several places, additional notes are written out in neat handwriting. May contain spells or give bonuses to knowledge checks, at DM's discretion. - 3,500 gp.

A genealogical scroll showing the family history of one of the realm's oldest noble families. Goes back for centuries. Most of the entries have elaborate pictures. Undead/immortal BBEG's might make an appearance near the top. - 7,500 gp

The manuscript of the BBEG's autobiography, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Zombie Mob. Written in a 6-foot high book with a platinum cover and pages of the finest beaten silver. A successful Sense Motive check reveals a number of exaggerations, egotistical showboating, and outright lies. - 8,000 gp

Beautiful yet alien abstract sculptures made of silver and obsidian. Possibly from another plane. - 10,00-15,000 gp apiece.

A secret cookbook by a famous, now-deceased chef. Many of the recipes call for human blood - 16,000 gp

A platinum orrery that depicts the cosmology of the multiverse. Valuable gems mark each plane. Possibly shows several previously unheard-of demiplanes. - 20,000 gp

The BBEG's research notes on the possibilities of developing a cure for vampirism. While not intrinsically valuable (and not an art object per se,) these would be priceless to the right scholar. - 24,000 gp.

An unknown painting by a world-famous artist who lived centuries ago depicting the BBEG. The painting is only a few months old (best for mortal BBEG's.) - 35,000 gp if authenticity can be proven.

An adamantium chest with platinum trappings and a sable lining on the interior, with a number of flawless diamonds adorning the sides. Contains dirty laundry. - 40,000 gp

Ancient ceramic figurines of servants and men-at-arms, presumably made to serve their master in the afterlife. - 100 gp apiece

Deck of finely illuminated playing cards, illustrated with famous heroes and villains - 200 gp

Nonmagical ball made of the finest crystal - 500 gp

Ancient book detailing the funeral rites of a now vanished culture - 850 gp

Miscellaneous small gems and pieces of precious metal, presumably for magic item construction - 1,200 gp+

A mechanical nightingale constructed of platinum and electrum - 2,000 gp

A elaborate summoning circle set into the floor, constructed of silver, obsidian, and meteoric iron. Contains 5 large diamonds at the points of the pentagram - 3,000 gp for the diamonds alone, 4,000 if the entire piece can be sold




A delicately carved piece of Chalcedney, such that the white part of the semi-prescious stone reveals a side view of a beautiful young woman carved in low relief with the reddish darker band left behind to accentuate it. (A Cameo, but sometimes when you break down the description of a familiar object, it seems more unusual.) ;) Stone value, @ 5GP, as art @75GP

A matched set of throwing daggars. (For competition) They are in a presentation case of rosewood with a green, kid leather lining.

A beautifully etched crystal pitcher with scenes of elves harvesting grapes, made from a single quartz crystal, with 7 matching glasses. (There used to be 8 but, over the years, one was broken.) 800GP ( would have been 1000 with the other glass)

An "illuminated" volume, a treatise on the comparitive anatomy of humans, elves, dwarves, goblins, hobgoblins, bugbear, and halflings; by a famous necromancer.500GP...if the buyer realizes a lot of the information is out of date and incorrect, 200GP

A set of small carved jade flat jars with silver lids. (For various unguents, cosmetics and so on) value of stone-20GP each, lids 20GP each, as a set of art objects (5 jars) 1000GP due to the complexity of the carving and the age.

Supposing your BBEG is a MU, or even if he is not, how about an ornate tapestry that initially looks like just designs, but on further inspection is all of the first level magic spells. Just the thing for the aspiring MU to donate to his Magic Alma Mater...except that it is 20' x 50' and weighs 322 pounds. 5,000 GP to 15,000 GP (Put this in the adventure I was running and, after much trouble getting it out, the teams MU did this, resulting in free level training for the next few levels)

A wine cellar, abundantly stocked with everythng from Uncle Rad's Cherry Wine (2gp/bottle) to Gavin's Honey Apricot Mead (5gp/bottle) to Elgwath's Cellars Premium Liquid Sunshine (500gp/bottle)and harder stuff. Whiskey and other powerfull spirits...from Jack's Rotgut Rum (hangover guaranteed) 4gp/bottle to Old Goat Fart #9 at 600gp/bottle.Not only are the bottles hard to transport, there will most likely be those in your party that will insist on sampling them. Then the second shift of guards report....

Beautiful china and silver flatwear service for those biiiiiig parties. Service for 100. Value 10,000gp

Ornate gold plated bronze lamp on the ironwood table next to his bed. 200gp
(table 50gp)

The complete and current skin of a Shortfaced Bear (Cave Bear) They were about the size of a Kodiak with their temperment being closer to a Grizzly. Now where did he get that...and are there any more? Name a price




Necklace of assorted scales, claws, and fangs from every known dragon and a single fang of one unknown one seperate from the necklace. These are all from dragons that are still living excluding the unknown one. To the right buyer the necklace sells for ~800,000 gp. The unknown fang, if sold to a cleric of a dragon god, goes for 1,000,000 gp, but causes realmwide problems when the fool ressurects the dragon from the fang...




If you're adding gold in addition to your goods, combine the two. Every proper BBEG should be paranoid enough to hide his loot. Money belts and shoes aside there are other places as well, heck I think it'd be really funny to place hunks of gold under the heatless torches that line his layer. They'd have to go around picking them up to figure out what's what (and, of course they all shouldn't have gold--maybe 1/18?). And those scrolls, if he isn't going to use them right away (a ____ so he can alter/upgrade his pad in the future) paint something on the other side and throw it in a canvas.

And every proper BBEG needs a medicine cabinet--no healing potions of course, just: something to help him sleep, something for his snoring. Some pink nail polish for him (or maybe just a clear coat to give it that healthy shine)--remember it was ancient China and Egypt both used it (tho that was more to show your class and stuff). While pink may be a feminine color in your PCs area of the woods maybe it means nobility in another. Perfumes, hair curlers, maybe stash a professional golem/hair stylist in there or something (personal pet peeve- when guys spend hundreds on cloths but think a $30 cut is stretching it). When you're giving him clothing don't forget to accessorize! You need shoes, hats, and gloves!

Btw, when dealing with sentimental boxes of letters they should totally be put in underwear drawers.

When thinking about where he lives remember it might not have been his at first. Say he stole a once great temple to Pelor, the window panes were smashed long ago but unknown to him, they're lined with gold. Another amusing thing would be a cruddy looking religious icon, like a glass sphere with something very expensive in the center. Works best if you have a cleric/paladin out for that church, that way they can't charge and are morally bound to turn it in (that is if they're being sponsored by their church).

His g.g.g.grandmother's famous cookie recipe.

Cook books rock, see that huge tome in his lair? Spellbook? No, cookbook. Also, remember oven mitts for your oven (they could be cute and collectable).

Map/model of a small island that BBEG owns, filled with celestial creatures that fell for their ignorance--they of course worship him like a god.




Jade chain: this delicate necklace is carved from a single block of green jade (the links were carved interlocking with each other). A gold clip allows it to be put/removed.

Jade funerary armor: this suit of full plate is made of dark blue jade on mithral plates. Each plate is decorated with silver filigree runes depicting the wearer's deeds, or his death, or a prophecy, etc. It is incredibly bulky, but is not designed for combat anyway.




A crayon drawing of a house and a smiling girl. It was made by his granddaughter. Should screw with the PCs' heads.




Collection of Dolls: some simple peasant rag and straw ones, well used and soiled from much love and play, a few porcelin ones showing age and use, one or two prestine condition porcelin dolls of moderate value (100gp), and then one very rare, ancient doll of extreme value, prize possesion of considerable value (2000gp)

Now the intrinsic value of such items aside, this is one of those treasures that make the pcs think about the bbeg they just whacked. Did the Evil Sorceress of Saguine Swamp have the heart of gold? Or were these just the prize possessions of small innocent children she molested and digested? Inquiring minds may want to know.

Then again.... there is the female half orc barbarian who acidentally just smashes the collection looking for "real" treasure as the erstwhile elven bard, who has been staring at the collection pondering its meaning and history, suddenly shrieks at the top of his lungs in disgust.




Have the BBEG invest heavily in a well stocked Humidor...yep a 10ft x 10ft room filled with nothing but exotic cigars. (Though a cigar chompin' BBEG might make a fun bad guy.)

Have rumors of the BBEG's gold horde be spread around for the adventures to hear. He does have a lot of gold, but it is all in unrefined ore. (much harder to transport, and takes time and money to smelt it).

Any hobby that the BBEG had could have treasures that are only valuable to collectors, but could bring in a huge sum from the right person. (How much would you pay for a 1970's "Pet Rock" or an unopened bottle of Coca Cola before they changed the formula?)

The BBEG could have:
A display case of five ancient silver pieces in mint condition (worth 5sp on the market, but 500gp to a collector who knows their rarity.)

One of the five remaining scrolls of Magic Missile by the famous (now dead) mage Blastum Widgit who was known for the artistic borders and illumination on his scrolls. A collector will pay 10 times its value.




A painting of a city except the people are really small.... if you look closely you swear one of them moved. if the painting is damaged it will cause damage to the city depicted. you notice it has been used as a dart board.

The BBEG should have expensive cigars and coffee (as coffee would be really rare)

I imagine that my latest BBEG would have an amulet that increases charisma in his bedroom so when he goes out he may have some luck with the ladies, it should be ludicrisly high bonus with the drawback that wearing it makes you evil or take the same bonus from your strength. But he probably needs the cha bonus badly.

a box of turkish delight except its coloured blue/green and called cubish delight, a tasty treat for oozemasters. It could be poisoned with acid for greedy adventurers.

An ornate medicine box, could contain roots for cleaning teeth, curing burns. Something to elieviate the symtoms of filth fever (very valuable to those without heal skills) For humor you could have large quantities of plants used as laxatives. Just because its a BBEG doesn't mean they are immune to constipation! Its probably why hes so cranky!

A valentines card or even better hanging in his room could be a childs drawing in coloured crayons! 'For unkie, this is a picture of my house and my mummy'

A scrying ball that can help the BBEG look out the front door without getting up from his plotting chair. (then he can just cast call lightning at traveling salesmen)

a bathtub with the create water spell and presitigitation to make it warm. (i believe it can do that!)
Enchanted inteligent scrubbing gloves (washes your back for you in the tub and fetches the soap for you)

i think a BBEG may have their own zoo with peacocks and cheetas, rare animals that double as guards

a mindflayer could have pickled brains for emergency snacks!

Two theatre tickets for the box opposite the royal box in the swankyest theatre in town. The players can enjoy a show and may never realise the BBEG wanted the box for a great assasination attempt.

Ballgowns, lots of them, in silk, all colours, brighter colours would cost more because the dye would be expensive. Perhaps this BBEG would dress up his captives?

The BBEG's familiar could have a jeweled collar (if magical consider it a collar of magic fang?)

Hats of prestigitation that clean your hair and dye it a colour when you choose.

a pillow with nightmare on it... of course this is placed in the guest bedroom (possibly with some indication its for his mother in law?)




A chessboard, the dark squares are gold, the light ones silver. The pieces are made from obsidian (volcanic rock) and platinum, and will fight each other when you play with them.

A bed with little clawed feet on the legs. It can walk around at a speed of ten feet at the behest of the person in it.

A pair of boots with little animated rollers and gears inside. They massage your feet when you press a button, with three different settings.

A bathrobe permanently enchanted with an endure elements spell (never feel cold getting out of the shower again!).

A mummified human head, with it's mouth open as if screaming in anguish. The teeth serve as a bottle opener.

A statue of a nude beautiful elf that dances suggestively at your command.




The Luggage- Thieved directly from Terry Pratchet's books a chest with dozens of animated legs that will follow you around loyally. More expensive versions had several permanent secret chest spells running that can be accessed through them as well as the mundane contents. Other versions, instead of having animated legs have permanently bound invisible servants or tenser's floating discs.

Accounts books- Hirelings, servants, materials, land, bribes, taxes, protectorates, wether your paying them or being paid by them it's gold that's moving around and you've got to keep track of it. A stack of neatly annotated ledgers on a desk somewhere with no innate value and probably the least interesting read anyone without ranks in proffession: Accountant, could manage to track down.

Narcissus' Diary: A mirror that when stared into begins to write in glowing text on it's surface anything spoken to it. It will record only languages with a written form and cannot translate this text for other users who do not understand them. Can hold virtually limitless recordings and play them back at request. Playbacks also include the reflection left in the mirror during the recording.

Heraldry: Shields, tabards, armour all lovingly decorated with the heraldic symbols of noble families. Now they are hung as grisely trophies in Evil's lair, a great tree perhaps with the shields of the knights killed beneath it's boughs nailed to it's great trunk, waiting for the symbols of the adventurer's to join them.




a rare set of mithral eating utensils: fork, spoon, and knife

A painting depicting Garl Glittergold and Kurtlemak sitting across a table from each other; playing cards with menacing looks upon their faces; Oldimarra is the dealing, and he's laughing.

A quarterstaff made of solid platinum; engraved upon it (in a long forgotten dialect of Dwarven) is the story of Ulgar Hammerfist, a legendary Dwarven martial artist.

A book with a leather covering and binding; inside you find that the pages are made of silk paper with a silver lining. The contents of the book describe in detail how to moderate some sort of adventure game.

A tiara made of cold iron looks fairly crude and unremarkable with the exception of the large -nearly palm sized- black pearl which is set into the metal on the front of the crown.




Golden Brain: a life sized, perfect replica of a human brain, made of solid gold. Each lobe has a precious jewel of a different type embedded in it. This can be either a bizarre decoration, or it might have magical properties.
Price: same as a Jewelled Crown from the DMG.

Villainous Pipe Organ: This thing could make Ganondorf or Davy Jones weep in envy. Made entirely of darkwood, the chair is cushioned with a pillow of richly embroidered black velvet and stuffed with feathers, the keys are made of bone with a gold, silver, or platinum coating, and the pipes are all hollowed-out spinal cords tipped with skulls.
Price: no idea.

Planar Checkerboard: A board game similar to Chinese Checkers with room for four players, made of polished ebony, painted with expensive pigments, and with marbles of tinted quartz. The board resembles the Great Wheel, and each player must play as Good, Evil, Law, or Chaos, each with its own unique strengths and weaknesses.
Price: 875 gp.




A few ideas for paintings, besides the obvious nude elves & suchlike (pervs):
The First Change A surprised-looking werewolf changing form under the full moon. Could be sold for 500 gp.
Aflame An ancient (400+ years old), beautiful painting of a castle burning. Worth 300 gp, 1050 to anyone who recognizes it's age (DC 18 knowledge [history] or DC 28 appraise).
These have both appeared in my campaign, but no one the PC's could find got the historical signifigance of the painting.




I plan to have my next major villain, a cigar-chomping half-fiend necromancer, have and use quite a few of these ideas. An intelligent, neutral skeleton bartender (one of his first animates) who knows his way around mixing drinks. A room of animated trophies (bears, dire wolves, maybe an immature purple worm) all kept in pristine condition by a permanent custom mass gentle repose spell effect. Maybe a couple of petrified creatures and/or adventurers as well. Oh, and a massive pipe organ, possibly able to be heard from miles around.

And, to add to the list, here's a couple of additions.

A bloodstone and obsidian unholy symbol (worth 90 gp) found embedded in the chest of an advanced zombie.
A set of barbed mithral bracers worth 500 gp. They provide no armor bonus and deal one point of damage if donned.
A necklace of six banded eye agates, strung together with sinew, with two large and mismatched fangs hanging in the middle which gives the whole thing a look of a multi-eyed predator (worth 23 gp).
A regal and imposing chariot. Made of darkwood and inlaid with mithral filigree, this chariot has massive unfolding wings along its sides. While it can't fly on its own, it could feasibly be pulled by a pair of flying creatures, more than likely nightmares if its a villain (12,550 gp).
A suit of masterwork chainmail entirely made from shark teeth (300 gp on its own, possibly two or three times that to a collector).




Canopic Jars made out of Astral Diamonds, containing the ashes of the servants of the entombed dragon. Worth 40,000 each.

Dragon's Crown- A crown large enough to fit a dragon's head, a snake head with rubies for eyes and emeralds as some of the scales. Worth 100,000 gp (but is slightly difficult to transport.)

Tears of the Night- Tears of the long dead goddess of the Night turned into a most precious metal when they came to earth. This metal is stronger than mithril, and more beautiful. Like a diamond in workable metal form. Worth 60,000 a pound, which is enough to make a set of armor.

Voice of the Silent King- The silent king was a man who had his voice taken away by an evil entity when he refused to surrender his kingdom to it. This entity (some say a devil, others a demon) grew wrathful, and stole the king's voice, for the king was much beloved by the people for his beautiful speeches. But the King still ruled, and he continued to be just and wise in his decisions, he just wrote them out instead of saying them. In this elegant urn the Silent King's voice is trapped. If you open the jar, you can hear him singing a song for his people, now long dead, praying that their souls go safely to the realms of the dead. The voice has remained conscious for all this time. Worth 500,000 to either his descendants, someone who wishes to use the king to pass down judgement once again, or a museum




A number of high-quality childrens' toys, clearly commissioned for the scions of great (or at least very wealthy) families....

Dream-maker crystals - A magical version of the childrens' toy where a round screen containing cut-outs and outlines of figures and animals is placed around a candle and wound up to produce moving shadows on the wall, this is simply an average-sized semiprecious crystal containing a minor illusion magic that can be placed over a candle flame. Once placed directly above the flame, it floats in place and projects an image on the wall.
The most basic of these toys projects a single immobile and silent image, and can be had for little more than a gold piece or two. More expensive versions may play soothing music, start or stop at a certain time of day or rotate to project a series of images that circle across the walls, and may contain more advanced illusions, such as moving images of knights and dragons that fight each other as they circle around the room. Some of the rarest crystals contain full performances of plays and concerts by famous artists including lifelike sound, comparable to a modern dvd, and may sell for several hundred gp or more.

Although any formally-trained arcanist would have made at least one dream-maker during their apprenticeship, each image must be created separately and a crystal cannot be reprogrammed after it's creation, so the considerable time and effort (not to mention artistic talent) involved in crafting them makes them rather rare outside of the nobility and prominent merchant families. This has not completely prevented them from having found occasional use by people other than rich parents too busy to entertain their children, however - a famous general several decades ago had several commissioned as easily-portable collections of maps, and a small number of high-end crystals with complex programs of illusions and preprogrammed start/stop times have been used by well-equipped burglars and spies in various daring high-profile robberies as distractions.

10gp - A small, well-worn wooden box, of no particular value, containing a small pile of poor-quality dream-maker crystals clearly crafted by someone very early in their apprenticeship, each one showing a single common image of one of the campaign's gods. The quantity of crystals and quality and content of the images strongly suggests the creator may well have abandoned his apprenticeship soon afterward in order to join the clergy. (Or if they belong to the BBEG, perhaps they crafted them not long before they began to turn down their current dark path, driven mad by Far Realm beings or whatever.)

100gp - The party finds a small platinum box studded with tiny jewels and lined with padded midnight blue velvet, containing six well-made dream-maker crystals that each project a common childrens' bedtime story with both sight and sound, as well as a seventh containing a moving portrait of what appears to be a family (some type of minor nobility from their dress) smiling and waving at the viewer. Could be either the BBEG's family or perhaps that of one of his victims.

500gp - A well-secured and powerfully trapped steel case containing a handful of crystals, the contents of which appear to be a presentation by an ancient general from several empires ago, detailing campaign strategies and battle tactics he implemented in his greatest engagements. Possibly worth twice as much to current high-ranking military personnel and historians.

A dream-maker crystal can be disenchanted for 2 gp of residuum.

Puzzlebox Dancer - This puzzlebox, a cube about seven inches on a side, appears to be made of multiple small cubes with various arcane symbols engraved in them that can be slid and rotated in various ways. By figuring out the right combination, the box springs open and unfolds itself into a small marionette-shaped magical construct, which performs an entertaining dance before folding itself back up into a cube again. Another configuration of cubes separates the box into two smaller dancers, who bow to each other and begin to perform a waltz. King Halzed of Forovar was said to have once recieved a puzzlebox dancer as a gift which could unfold itself into an entire company of dancers and perform a popular ballet.
A common puzzlebox dancer can sometimes fetch around 30 gold pieces, although many are often made of rare woods and have gold leaf and small jewels for eyes, fetching a hundred gp or more.

25gp - The party finds a finely-crafted puzzlebox dancer, but upon opening it they discover that the dancers are naked and quite clearly represent the current king and queen of the nation the PCs are in, and the dancers begin crudely fornicating instead of dancing. Worth 25gp solely as a curiosity - may be worth at least 50 gp if disassembled and sold for materials. If successfully smuggled out of the country and given to the king of the neighboring land, could well be worth either thousands of gold pieces or perhaps just the PCs' lives, lol.

Porcelain Fairy Queen doll - An exquisite marvel of artistry and mechanical engineering, this 18-inch tall porcelain doll manufactured by elven artificers is fully articulated, and extremely lifelike. By pressing a number of buttons on the back and pulling several concealed cords, one can cause the Fairy Queen's wings to flap, its eyes to open and close or its arm to raise up and wave, as well as several other functions. Its silk and satin garments are covered in real gold thread and several small precious stones, the wings are stained glass and its hair can be identified with a Nature skill check to be made of hair from a unicorn's mane, topped with a crown of real gold and jewels upon its head.
Although it may well fetch several hundred gold pieces if sold to humans, if offered for sale to an elf it will first gather a number of strongly pointed questions as to where and how it was was procured before they will offer an exhorbitant sum to purchase it. If a price cannot be arranged, they may well attempt to part the PCs from it by force or trickery.

Toy Soldiers - A large 3 ft. by 2 ft. by 2 ft. finely-crafted wooden box containing a stack of felt-lined wooden trays. Each tray holds nearly fifty small gold-inlaid marble or silver-inlaid onyx toy soldiers, and various other toy instruments of war such as chariots and a handful of creatures. A successful History check will identify the set as a complete recreation of a famous ancient battle, Second Altezzezar, where the swordmage Lady Marvelle Alviot defeated the archlich Nebbuch in a final climactic struggle after a long campaign on the Plains of Wind. The set will easily sell for 200 gold pieces.




Vase of Souls

A huge clear vase made of either crystal or glass full of small faintly glowing beads of brilliant colors. Some of the beads are black and cracked. and there seems to be a fine black powder building up at the bottom of the vase.

Polychromatic Lichen, aka Painter's Mold

A brightly coloured type of lichen that grows on rocks and ice sheets in the far north. It's used as a decorative plant up north and as an ingredient in paints and dyes down south. Painter's Mold is sold by weight in the markets of the south, where it usually fetches a price of approximately 25gp/kilogram. However, some rare colours (like purple and white) are worth far more.

Crystalline Creeper, aka Shinevine

A parasitic tropical vine that resembles a glass rope studded with ruby flowers. It is greatly prized as a decoration for the gardens of the rich, but only in regions too cold for it to grow naturally. Each metre of Shinevine is worth roughly 200 gp, but only while still alive. And as many ruined merchants can tell you, the vine tends to die at the slightest provocation once removed from its native habitat.

Vampire Bush, aka Bleeder

A rather boring thorny bush valuable only for the potent anticoagulant that coats its thorns. Said anticoagulant is very useful to doctors, and sells for 5 gp/litre. Each bush contains half a litre of anticoagulant.

Sunshade Palm, aka Umbrella Tree

A tree that resembles an organic parasol. They grow naturally in the deserts of the south, but are hardy enough to survive almost anywhere. An ordinary tree is worth 20 gp, but the price can be much higher or lower for unusually large or small specimens.

Rainbow Mushrooms, aka Corpsebursters

A popular hallucinogenic mushroom that grows from the corpses of animals. Each one is worth 15 gp, but prospective merchants must take care to ensure that they are not eaten by mice.

Utopia Tree, aka God's Gift

A small tree with triangular leaves that produces enough magical fruit to feed a city indefinitely. It sprouts only in places where it is needed, leading to a common belief that it is sent by the gods to help the hungry. It's theoretically worth five million gold pieces, but since selling it would be grounds for a holy war for most major churches nobody has ever actually made any money off it.

Utopia Fruit, aka Divine Sustenance

A small golden fruit that tastes delicious, never goes bad, and provides enough nutrition to keep you alive for three days. It is produced by the Utopia Tree, and religious law prohibits its sale on the grounds that it is the property of the gods. Nonetheless, a few intrepid thieves have sold these fruits for 100 gp each before.

Drazil Tree, aka Island Mangrove

A tree that resembles a continent more than anything else. Only one is known to exist, and it grows out of the center of the Grand Western Ocean. It currently supports several nations on its roots and a smattering of tribes on its branches. Buying or selling it is simply not feasible, although conquering it is possible.

Drazil Seed, aka Island Egg

A two-metre long brown seed shaped like an egg. If planted in salt water, one of these might eventually grow into another Drazil tree. But nobody would want to buy one for that. These seeds are worth 1000 gp apiece not because of their potential, but because of their tastiness (and size).

[Bullet06320]

Haha, I'm just imagining my players stripping and selling off the major tourist attraction in the city down to the carpets. I can imagine that would cause a great deal more problems than it would be worth... I love forcing hard decisions for my players.

Editors note: most of the following list is intended to compliment the opera house created by Sanctaphrax




1. TruWind Chime Symphony - A magnificent collection of finely worked and tuned chimes, bells and instruments that plays a variety of symphonies dependent on the strength of the wind. A perfect balcony piece for the discerning villain. 7,000 gp for the set of 96, 1,500 gp installation cost (Or the bard can try to have a go at it)

2. Self Cleaning Throne rug - Since villains often have to make examples out of the guests that come barging into their throne rooms, it is handy to have a self cleaning rug to take care of this. 4,000 gp for long (40 ft), 2,500 gp for short (20 ft). Gold in-weave, x1.5

3. Magically Preserved Ice sculptures - These ornately carved structures slowly lose their detail and melt over 150 years when stored at normal room temperature. They slowly lose their regal splendor and look anguished as they near their end, reminding everyone of their own mortality. Perfect for the nihlist. 10,000 gp when fresh, price deteroriates thereafter. Any heat greatly reduces the life span of the structure

4. Tribal Masks - These ceremonial masks made by Orcs/lizardmen/Goblins/etc look like they were never used and probably gifted as tribute to the BBEG. They might not be worth much in the area that the tribe menaces but a collector in a far off land might pay up to 150 gp per mask

5. Giant Canvases - Who knows whether it was a giant creature or magicks that created these, these 20ft by 12 ft canvases are smooth and fresh. It looks like the BBEG was using the blood of his enemies to create interesting splatter patterns on this one, but those rolls in the closet might sell for 250 gp

Coin cord - Though coinage containing holes in the middle are usually found in far-off lands, the value of gold usually holds across cultures. These lengths of leather cords or string are usually looped and the ends connected by knots or in some cases metal clips. Often times beads are used to separate counts of coins (5 or 10) for easily tabulation. Usually come in strings of 100 gp

Concealed coin purse - The wealthy are often wary of the pick pocket and thieves that inhabit metropolitan areas and often carry their pocket money tucked away in coin purses that can be placed between layers of clothes and muffle the jingle of coins. For example this green velvet rectangular case has a silver dragon woven into the outer cover (Possibly a 100 gp emerald makes the dragon eye). Several layers of soft velvet separate the inner compartment into 3 main sections, allowing for different denominations, and small pocket can carry keys or jewels. 150 gp (+100 gp with the emerald)

Securthos (Dwarven wealth thermos) - Given the highly practical nature of dwarves, it is not surprising that they concocted these. Outwardly the shape of a large tankard with a heavy cap, these heavy steel containers are usually found chained to the belt of a dwarven miner or voyager. Their locking cap makes them a portable safe that is too large to be easily tucked into the cloaks of most pick pockets. They are usually made of tough tempered steel that can be used as a portable soup pot, a small smelter for gold or silver, or in some circumstances a club. However their weight and encumbrance can impose a -1 penalty to attack rolls if worn around the waist. Worth roughly 30 gp but often contain the personal possessions of a dwarf. Sometimes found in large numbers in the lairs of dragons, who, depending on their disposition, may or may not have emptied their contents.

Heavy attache case - Though it maybe covered in the a layer of leather, these attache cases are almost always made out of metal or darkwood. A pair of masterwork locks keep the case from being opened by unwanted hands. Inside coins are often in wrapped stacks of 10 pieces in a 20 by 50, making this case worth 10,000 gp and weigh roughly 200 lbs. Of course it has a minor magical enhancement that emulates Tensers floating disk and keeps at at 25 lbs. Worth 250 gp on its own

Siamese Khlui The khlui is an end-blown woodwind instrument similar to a recorder, with a narrow windway and a blade-like edge to channel and vibrate air blown into it. It is generally made of bamboo, though instruments are also made from hardwood.
Khlui U The khlui U is the largest of khlui family and is usually played before an upper-class audience, who appreciate its softer sound. As such, a considerable amount of workmanship can go into these instruments, with small jewels and silver tracings worked into the body. 300 gp
Khlui Phiand Aw The khlui phiand aw is the middle child of the khlui family, with medium size and tone that might be found in both traditional folk festivals and in performances before nobility. 100 gp
Khlui Lib Khlui lib is the smallest but most common form of the khlui, commonly found in children’s possession as well as in folk festivals, where it’s loud sharp sound can be readily heard over a commotion. 5 gp

Siamese Pi
Pi nok A traditional quadruple reed oboe, the pi nok is smallest among Pi and have been played since the ancient times. They are probably most common and they are sharper and louder than their brethren. Length is 31 cm. Width is 3.5 cm. 10 gp
Pi klang A traditional quadruple reed oboe, the pi klang is popular amongst travelling musicians. This one is painted with the stylized design of Coatl in flight. Its length is 37 cm and its width is 4 cm. 50 gp
Pi nai A traditional quadruple reed oboe, the pi nai is commonly used in performances before nobility due to its softer sound. It is most likely to have intricate designs and art etched into it, as well as jewels and tracings of precious metals. This particular one has a silver dragon with tiny emerald eyes at its tip . Length is 41-42 cm. Width is 4.5 cm. 500 gp

String: Saw duang A bowed string instrument with a hardwood soundbox covered on the playing end with python skin. It is held vertically and has two silk strings that are played with a bow. The neck of this one has silver ivy creeping up from an elaborate garnet flower on the soundbox. The bow also has silvered end pieces and a small garnet bud on the end. 1000 gp

String: Saw U’s soundbox is made from a coconut shell that is covered on the front end by cowskin. It is held vertically and has two silk strings that are played with a bow. While the silver tuners obviously add value to this Saw U, it is the carving of Olidammara on the back of the coconut shell, done by a local master, which gives this piece incredible value. 7500 gp

String: Saw samsai Its body is made from a special type of coconut covered on one end with goat skin, and it has three silk strings. Typically, the player glues a jewel onto the skin before playing, to reduce the skin's resonance. It is the hardest to play among the 3 types of Saw. Because of this, it is frequently used as a prop in pictures to show knowledge or a high social status. This one is a magnificent work of art, with an emerald and jade jewel for the skin, platinum accents and an elaborate carving of Corellon dancing that is inlaid with gold. Truly a masterpiece worthy of a royal collection. 15,000 gp

String: The jakhe is a plucked zither made of wood in a stylized crocodile shape and is approximately 20 cm high and 140 cm long. Its highest two strings are made of silk or yarn and lowest is made of brass. It has raised frets made of bamboo, which are affixed to the fretboard with wax. The player uses his or her left hand on the fretboard while plucking the string by his right hand with a tapered plectrum made from ivory or water buffalo horn, which is tied to the player's index finger. This one is made of darkwood, carved intricately to resemble a dire crocodile in motion, with teeth made of ivory and eyes of amber. Large jade scales form the distinctive crocodilian back ridge, framing the strings. 10,000 gp

String: The khim is a hammered dulcimer. It is made of Fey teakwood and trapezoidal in shape, with numerous brass strings, and two silvered bridges. It is played with two flexible bamboo sticks and is used as both a solo and ensemble instrument. 1000 gp

Percussion The ranad ek has 21 or 22 wooden bars suspended by cords over a boat-shaped trough resonator, and is played with two mallets. The resonator is carved to actually look like a ship with golden nagas forming the rails and mastheads. Ranat ek bars are typically made from rosewood, though this one comes with an additional set with bamboo bars that produce a softer sound as well as 2 additional soft mallets. 1,500 gp

Percussion The ranad thum is a low pitched xylophone with 18 wooden keys, which are stretched over a boat-shaped through resonator like a ranad ek, but it is lower and wider. It is usually played in accompaniment of a ranad ek. Ranat thum bars are typically made from bamboo, although instruments with rosewood bars can also be found. This ranad thum is crafted by the elves of Thirivada forest and is made out Mallorn wood with the image of a silver waterfall in a serene forest engraved in platinum, gold and silver along the front. 5,000 gp

Percussion The khong wong yai is a gong circle with 16 tuned bossed gongs in a rattan frame and is played with two beaters. It is used in ensemble to provide the skeletal melody. The gongs are individually tuned with beeswax and are made of brass. This piece is finely made, it’s pristine sound making up for its simple appearance. 500 gp
Percussion The khong wong lek has 18 tuned bossed gongs, and is smaller and higher in pitch than the ‘khong wong yai’. Both instruments are played in the same manner, the ‘khong wong lek’ plays a faster and more ornate variation on the principal melody, with less use of two-note chords. This set has silver gongs an ornately carved with integrated semi-precious stones. 1,000 gp

Drum Glong thad are large barrel drums used in the classical and folk music of jungle elves of the Thirivada. They are played with large wooden sticks. They are usually played in a pair and used in ensemble. 100 gp each

Drum Glong khaek is a type of double-headed barrel drum that comes in pairs of a male and female counterparts. They are always played in a pair, usually by two players, although if two players are not available a single player may play both drums. Though originally brought to the Gulf of Suytai by Eladrin traders, they are actually native to the Hiratsu Hobgoblins from the Jintoseas Archipelago in the far south. Worth 250 for a pair.

Drum Thone & ramana are drums played as a pair in Suytai classical music. It consists of two drums: the thone (a goblet drum with a ceramic or wooden body) and the ramana (a small frame drum). The ‘thone’ gives a low pitch and the ‘ramana’ gives a high pitch. They are used usually in the khruang sai ensemble. This is a fine looking set with a rich ruby red paint job and alternating Amber and moonstones set in brass around the rim. 750 for both.

Cymbals The ching are small bowl-shaped finger cymbals of thick and heavy bronze, with a broad rim. They measure about 2 inches (5 cm) in diameter and are joined together with a cord, which passes through a small hole at the apex of each one of them. Each cymbal of the pair is held in one hand and the two are struck together. The ching are the timekeeper for ensembles. 50 gp

Painting Ensemble #3 A simple but well done 24"x36" still life of instruments, including a cello, harp and viola. 60 gp

Painting The last kiss of the night This painting depicts a handsome vampire about to passionately bite the throat of a bare breasted young maiden on a balcony as the first rays of sunlight hit the building beside them. It’s well done, but kind of gaudy. The artist likely has never seen or encountered a real vampire. 125 gp

Painting Falujji’s Audience The climactic scene of the opera Falujji, in which the hero Arastor demands that Pelor return Jeccinea, his lost love. The painting has Arastor down on his knees, raising a hand towards the heavens in a shining ray of light. Considered the most impressive of the artist Hevee De’Waltsou’s work, or perhaps the only one worth having. 500 gp

Painting Ertoil Castle A landscape dominated by the black Ertoil Castle rising from the crest of Gavel hill. A tremendous storm is tearing across the sky towards the castle. This image is meant to emulate the moments before the castle fell to the demonic forces that Lord Ittrusk secretly summoned in his bid for power. 500 gp

Painting Menagerie II A collection of colorful birds that sitting on branches of a tropical Throymorgian willow tree. There is an abjurer macaw, a fairy blue bird, a looped beak toucan, a red-winged blue beak parrot, and a striped wrinkle hornbill. Part of a sought after collection by Sigmund Throsforei, a gnomish ornithologist and artist. 800 gp

Painting Untitled A golden snow-capped mountain range glimmering in the early morning sunlight, the steep cliffs casting long shadows down the mountainside. It is painted in awe-inspiring romantic style, with expressive brushstrokes and rich colors. 250 gp

Painting The death of Telamyr A mannerist style painting depicting the hanging of the man Telamyr, who was supposedly a warlock in service of unnatural beings. His dark hanging body dominates the center of the frame though his face is hidden in shadow and he is surrounded by a dark aura. The crowd of onlookers surrounding the gallows is painted in much lighter colors, which lends gravity to the center due to the heavy contrast. It appears to be signed Telamyr but scholars debate whether this is a signature or title of the work. 1250 gp

Painting The Huntsmen A large Eladrin Renaissance painting of a huge man with a stag’s head springing from a crouch after a fox. Behind the stag man are several mounted hunters. Great detail has gone into every leaf, branch and stick, and there is a great deal of depth in the image, so much so that at first glance it might appear to be a window. 2000 gp

Painting Salvation The most famous work by fanatically devoted Pelorite Baroque artist Mollani Musqueso, Salvation is considered to be one of the great works of the age. Mollani inspiringly illustrates the transformation of pure light into the divine hand of Pelor as he grasps the wrist of a drowning man, to pull him from the water. The intense play of light and shadow and the vivid tangibility of the water creates powerful tension and many report experiencing deep emotional insights from viewing it. 10,000 gp

Painting Untitled (Victory) An elaborate modern painting of the BBEG in his most glorious splendor, raising his bloody weapon as he stands on a pile of corpses. The corpses appear to be adventurers as well as knights and other do-gooder types (possibly includes the corpses of PCs). Despite from it’s large size and extensive array of colors, the image couldn’t really be considered high art. 300 gp

Painting Feast A still life of leftovers after a dwarven feast. If you know how dwarves eat, then you’d probably be able to guess that it’s mainly crumbs and small bits of food that aren’t substantial enough to warrant scraping off a plate. 150 gp



And this my dear playgrounders finishes transferring this post over, it still needs some editing IMO, and almost didn't have time to finish as the WOTC forums are due to shut down any minute now. I'm glad I was able to, the back half of this thread had some very good material posted in it, ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!