View Full Version : Tales of a D20

2015-11-04, 10:04 AM
Post some funny RPG stories, True of made up, in a screenplay fashion like so:

DM: Ok, so this Colossus decides to stop you into jelly
Steve: So who is he gonna hit?
DM: Uh... Jerry
Jerry: Crap! Well how much damage does it do?
DM: Hold on (counts dice on table)
DM: Steve, can I borrow a few d8s
Steve: Sure, (hands 5 over)
DM: I'm gonna need more, alright everyone pool your d8s
Jerry: Well, you're not gonna kill-
DM: Full damage and crit, you are jelly, roll d100 to see what flavor

2015-11-06, 04:19 PM
That just sounds kinda douchey to me.

2015-11-06, 05:16 PM
That just sounds kinda douchey to me.

Strongest username to post content ratio I have ever seen on GITP.

2015-11-06, 09:44 PM
We already have a Campaign Quotes thread!

Jay R
2015-11-07, 11:18 PM
PC: I rolled an 8. Is that high enough?
DM: No.
Me: Try turning it on its side.

2015-11-10, 01:01 PM
Ranger: I drop my torch down the chasm to the sorcerer.
DM: Sorcerer, roll a D20.
Sorcerer: 17.
DM: Ok Ranger, roll a D20. If it's a 17, it hits the Sorcerer and sets him on fire.
Ranger: 17.

2015-11-11, 12:14 PM
This is a tale of a strange game, a one-shot using the GM's own homebrew rules (which he never let anybody look at-- you just had to trust he knew what he was doing). As a one-shot, the two of us players were forced into predetermined roles: I had a race of bug people fighting for limited resources against a race of monkeys. We were each doing our own strategies to out-do the other. One day, I discovered that the monkeys had sentries in various locations. I managed to sneak up on one and capture him. Then, I wanted to repeat the process. My opponent had 30 monkeys all out on sentry duty. The GM had me roll a d30 to see how many I captured before they were alerted.

I rolled a 30.

The end.