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View Full Version : Life is unbelievable sometimes (a happy story)



Jon_Dahl
2015-12-09, 10:29 AM
For the past four years, I studied during late evenings after work. I did all this to prepare myself for university and it was a very good idea. It worked marvellously and I got this general idea about various subjects and a solid studying rhythm.

There was just one problem: Him.

The guy at the back row... He never missed a chance to disrespect me, laugh at my mistakes, make some bad comments about my "stupid questions". All that for about 3 or 4 years. That was the only thing that bothered me.

Now, by a chance, I noticed his mug in Facebook! It was him alright! I wasted no time and I wrote him that I had suffered so much because of him, but I thanked him for making me a stronger person and that I was doing really great and continuing with my studies even though I had made such idiotic questions.

His reply surprised me completely.

He had never realized that he had bullied me. He didn't remember any of the stuff. I told me that he had been bullied a lot when he was a kid (pre-teen). He commented the offensive stuff that he had told me and he said that he always says immediately whatever comes to his mind, and it's not meant to offend anyone. He just can't help it. Then he wished me all the best in the future and I was completely confounded. I could've not been more surprised, just impossible.

What is the lesson of this story? I will leave that to you, but I feel vindicated, relieved but also a bit sad... for him. I just wanted to share this with you. Thank you!

Bulldog Psion
2015-12-09, 11:04 AM
Glad that turned out decently for you. :smallsmile:

rakkoon
2015-12-10, 10:26 AM
It's weird that we sometimes don't know the impact of our words/actions. This guy didn't know apparently but it surely affected you. I hope that I'm not that guy for someone else and I am glad you're feeling happier

Jay R
2015-12-10, 09:11 PM
What is the lesson of this story?

1. Almost nobody's a monster. Most people who hurt you are doing it by accident. Forgive them when you can.

2. You probably don't know you're doing it when you hurt somebody else. You should probably pay a little more attention to the impact of your own words and actions.

~Corvus~
2016-01-02, 03:54 AM
No one will truly condemn their own actions unless there is some self-interest involved. There's another side to any story, and there is rarely truth, only facets. See In the Grove (http://fullreads.com/crime/in-a-grove-by-ryunosuke-akutagawa/) as an example of this. In another direction, look to How to Win Friends and Influence People. The latter is an amazing read, and the entire book can shed light on your scenario.


1. Almost nobody's a monster. Most people who hurt you are doing it by accident. Forgive them when you can.

It's important to not take things too personally. It's important to remember that each person is not acting because of you, but by their own perception of what you & the world around them does: this supports Jay R's point here.

Some Android
2016-01-03, 12:22 AM
What is the lesson of this story?

Life is full of surprises/misunderstandings, people aren't as bad as you think, there's good in everyone. Or something like that.