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View Full Version : What to do when you hate your own game



Sajiri
2016-02-06, 03:12 AM
A few months ago, I finally tried my hand at DMing. My regular DM runs three seperate games for me- one I asked for, one he asked me over and over to try (but I ended up liking a lot more than I thought I would), and one that was an experiment for us that is a lot more casual and lighthearted than our usual ones. All of them are solo player games since we had trouble keeping a group with more people together. Even though I'd never DM'd before, I wanted to do it to give him a chance to be a player for once, except that I despise the game I made up for him.

I one day said jokingly to him "maybe I should run a monster girl quest campaign." Jokingly, because he knows how much I hate that game after someone convinced me to play it because it had 'great gameplay and the fights are fun', but I couldnt take more than 30 minutes of it before I closed it and swore never to touch it again. If you dont know what it is, it's basically a japanese game that revolves around monster girls trying to beat and rape the player character....not really my type of thing. But instead of taking it as a joke, he got excited for it, and somehow I ended up agreeing to actually do it. Now, it is far more toned down than the pc game, has plenty of non-sexual content and doesnt focus on rape, (basically he's just meeting a bunch of monster girls and recruiting them to a travelling caravan while he travels around trying to find a new home after having to flee his old one) but I still dont enjoy it at all. I'm not against sexual content in a game or uncomfortable about it, but I hate the characters Im creating and introducing, I have no interest in the world, and we're 8 sessions in and I still don't have any idea of what the plot is, being that anytime I try to brainstorm I cant work up the interest for it. I'm basically just making everything up on the spot and somehow not getting details forgotten or mixed up yet. But the player loves it, and he likes having a chance to not be the DM for a change.

I don't dislike DMing for him. Actually I quite enjoy it. I just don't like DMing this game. I don't want to call it off and have him be the DM forever, but even if I did he tends to hold our other games hostage after a while if I dont run at least one session of this for him, but I cant really blame him for it. I tried to nudge him into a different game instead that I'd rather run and have more interest in, which he's agreed to...except that he's also talked me into inviting two other friends (Im not used to playing with anyone else), and he still expects the current one to keep going. He knows I hate it, but if we dont do it then at least one of the other ones he runs gets called off.

I'm not really sure what to do here. As I said, its not that I dont want to run anything for him, especially with the amount of games he runs, but I find this particular game just one big chore and something I dread getting brought up because I cant work up any enthusiasm or enjoyment for it. Ive tried finding ways to make myself like it, such as thinking about characters I'd rather see in it instead of ones tailored for him or fun an entertaining encounters that could happen in the future, but even that doesnt help me. Is this something I should just keep going through since he enjoys it, or should I be able to step out of it? Short of offering him three alternative games to match the ones he runs, even I cant think of a fair way to cancel this one, but I feel like its not going to go anywhere when I cant even bring myself to plan for it.

FabulousFizban
2016-02-06, 03:51 AM
you have to be honest with him about it. bottom line. If you don't bring up that you aren't having fun, he won't know. Girl up and do it.

Sajiri
2016-02-06, 05:26 AM
you have to be honest with him about it. bottom line. If you don't bring up that you aren't having fun, he won't know. Girl up and do it.

Oh, I have been honest about it. Multiple times. Which is usually where the 'well it's not fair that I run these other three and you wont run this' comes up. He's well aware I don't like it and tends to just get offended that I don't.

goto124
2016-02-06, 06:13 AM
What happens if you don't run the games anyway?

Sajiri
2016-02-06, 06:44 AM
Then he wont DM the other ones we do, one of which we have 130+ sessions of already. I dont mind the part of us taking turns to DM something for the other, its just this particular game I dont like

TurboGhast
2016-02-06, 07:33 AM
Ask the other player if you could DM a different game system, since you dislike the one you're currently using while DMing.

hymer
2016-02-06, 07:37 AM
Then he wont DM the other ones we do, one of which we have 130+ sessions of already. I dont mind the part of us taking turns to DM something for the other, its just this particular game I dont like

So it's extortion. I'll have to take that up, too. Have my players do my garden for me. If they don't, no RPG for them!
Seriously, the DM needs to be sat down and informed his behaviour is unacceptable. You shouldn't behave that way to strangers, much less to friends. I don't know how you break that to him and keep it all smooth, but his behaviour is completely unacceptable. RPG isn't a commodity to be traded, it's fun to be had. And everyone at the table needs to be having fun.
I can certainly feel his pain, being much less player and much more DM than I want to, but he's got to get past that.

kraftcheese
2016-02-06, 08:03 AM
So it's extortion. I'll have to take that up, too. Have my players do my garden for me. If they don't, no RPG for them!
Seriously, the DM needs to be sat down and informed his behaviour is unacceptable. You shouldn't behave that way to strangers, much less to friends. I don't know how you break that to him and keep it all smooth, but his behaviour is completely unacceptable. RPG isn't a commodity to be traded, it's fun to be had. And everyone at the table needs to be having fun.
I can certainly feel his pain, being much less player and much more DM than I want to, but he's got to get past that.

Exactly; I mean he KNOWS you don't like the game, that you don't enjoy running the sessions (from your description of the game I can't imagine who would...), etc and he's threatening to cancel your other sessions to manipulate you into GM-ing some ****ty monster girl sessions that only he is enjoying?

I mean I understand being disappointed that no-one wants to play a game you want to play, but jeez don't hold your friends ransom with something they hate ya know? Your mate should be able to meet you in the middle and let you GM something you also enjoy, full stop.

Faily
2016-02-06, 11:28 AM
Put your foot down. Not only tell him you're not enjoying the game, but you absolutely hate it and would feel more inclined to have multiple root-canals done.

I get his point, I really do... it's hard always being the GM and never the player, but do offer him to do something else, anything else. In my experience, a game isn't fun if the GM isn't feeling it. But forcing people to do something they don't like and hate... not cool.

Thrudd
2016-02-06, 12:39 PM
Either stop running it, or change what you're running to something you like.

Lacco
2016-02-06, 01:21 PM
Is there anything that can be done with the premise that would make it more fun/playable/enjoyable for you?

If not, can you try to pinpoint what is the worst part, which - if changed - could make it fun?

And if not - I would understand that and your friend should also. So - open discussions about how can you repay him the favour of GMing for you while not suffering :smallsmile:

I would ask him about other game premises that he would like to play - and if you want to be really diplomatic, tell him that you have a writer's block and have no idea how to work within the premise. As a GM I would take this better, since I know the feeling.

Sajiri
2016-02-06, 03:50 PM
Is there anything that can be done with the premise that would make it more fun/playable/enjoyable for you?

If not, can you try to pinpoint what is the worst part, which - if changed - could make it fun?

And if not - I would understand that and your friend should also. So - open discussions about how can you repay him the favour of GMing for you while not suffering :smallsmile:

I would ask him about other game premises that he would like to play - and if you want to be really diplomatic, tell him that you have a writer's block and have no idea how to work within the premise. As a GM I would take this better, since I know the feeling.

We have tried to talk about what could make it more enjoyable for me, and really all I can come up with is 'maybe I'll like it more in the future when the characters get more personality and more stuff starts happening.' The parts of it I don't like are I don't like the npcs Im playing- for one thing we have a bunch of character art saved rather than myself drawing it like I normally would, and I've tried to make an npc 'of every flavour' and it's just...dull to me. Even if its not like the actual MGQ game, due to the nature of this they have...certain personalities, which don't sit all that well with me and is most definitely not the sort of characters I would normally ever play. And I have to admit Im not that fond of his player character, something about it just personally offends me but I cant decide what. He has offered to change it to make me enjoy it more, but I just cant really think of in this setting what I would enjoy. Being that this is a solo player game, its very roleplay heavy so there's a lot of interaction between the npcs and his character, rather than a lot of dice rolling.

I did introduce another character in the last session which was more 'for me' and someone I would enjoy using in the plot but, the player didn't seem to like her very much. I am overall having issues coming up with a proper plot which is stressful in it's own right- at the moment it doesnt matter much but eventually it will. To be fair, the player has offered to help me world build or come up with a plot too because he knows Im having trouble with it, but that kind of takes away from it if he helps come up with it and knows what's meant to happen.

I did mention it in the first post but I'll clarify, I did offer an alternative game- a pokemon tabletop united one which he was pretty interested in, and Im far more interested in. That's one I already had a setting for because I was going to base it off an old pkmn fangame I was working on years ago, and I'm just in general more interested in pokemon than monster girls. He did agree to that one, but then also talked me into allowing 2 other players in, which Im a little nervous about because I havent dm'd for anyone other than him before and it's been a few years since we've had anyone else in our group. But he still expects our first one to keep going.

The reason he specifically expects it, is because one of the games he runs for me is 'similar' in tone and takes place in a different part of the same setting which we've both come up with, so by me saying I dont like this one he takes it as me being a hypocrite. Except that 1. he wasnt basing the game or characters of something I know he hates and 2. It was a game he suggested to me to play, rather than me asking for it. He takes it as a personal attack that I don't want to run this one for him, when it's ultimately just something I thought I could do but couldnt- it's mainly what I came up with that I don't like, because I was trying to stick to content that I wasnt really comfortable with or all that fond of in the first place.

Kyberwulf
2016-02-06, 03:57 PM
Yeah, welcome to the life of a Dm. Most of the time you aren't having fun. You are stuck though. He is a special snowflake, and if you do anything that compromises that. You are railroading.

Nifft
2016-02-06, 04:00 PM
Sounds like you need different (and better) players.

Thrudd
2016-02-06, 06:03 PM
It's your game, do what you want with it. Don't like the NPCs? Have them leave or get killed or just fade into the background until he forgets about them. Change the tone and the characters to watever you like, introduce new characters that you invent and like. Turn it into a supernatural murder mystery - who's killing off all his beloved girls, one by one?

Also, I think you are in dire need of more players, you should be jumping for joy to get the new players. I doesn't sound like this one-on-one rpg thing is very fun or exciting for you and getting new input will be good for you both.

Sajiri
2016-02-06, 06:38 PM
Well I suppose killing them off would be one way to handle it. Maybe I do just need to do a vast change of it all...'supernatural murder mystery' did give me an idea on it's own

oxybe
2016-02-06, 07:29 PM
Remember this mantra: no game is better then a bad game.

You can always do something else that night if that GM is threatening to cancel your other games: play a few rounds of your fav videogame, catch up on a tvseries, invite friends over to to play D&D...

Don't let him goad you into doing something you don't want to. You are not obliged to continue running a game you don't want to and if he hangs another game's existance in the balance, call his bluff.

Worst case scenario, you just got yourself a new game night with a new group who just lost their GM. Minus the jerk who canceled because you didn't want to run a MonMosu game you didn't care for, obviously.

Sajiri
2016-02-10, 02:14 AM
Well we did end up doing another session of our game, and I decided to start leading it down another direction which he seemed interested in. Asked him to give me some time to work out what to do with it all from here on as I change it up which he was okay with, and I suppose Im okay with it too. Of course as chance would have it, the very next day I got a phone call and found out Im starting work later this week, so he's willing to give me even more time thanks to that now

Quertus
2016-02-10, 11:19 AM
Random questions: why are you using pregen art in the game you hate, rather than creating your own, like you usually do? Why are you creating NPCs you hate, rather than ones you'd like? Are you subconsciously trying to distance yourself from the game, is the other player trying to specify too many details that it is hampering your creative involvement, or is there some other underlying reason?

Figuring out the answer to these questions may help you to figure out, not only how to change this game, but how to keep this from being a problem in the future.