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blackout
2007-06-16, 03:01 PM
Several places down the street from Trog's Tavern is the Chuckle Bucket Comedy Club. Only opened recently, the club acts as a place for laughs and to have drinks to come out your nose. Feel free to come on up to do your comedy routines, or simply come to watch others be laughed at. Feel free to join in the laughing.

30 GP to get into the Chuckle Bucket.

20 GP to come up on stage and perform your routine/tell jokes/etc. If the patrons like it, you get half of the entry fee from the night as a reward.

Drinks include beer, and ale. And for the kids, milk.

Food includes nachos, cheeseburgers, steak, coleslaw, salads of every type, and Bamhacon that was 'borrowed' from Trog's.

NPCs include Johnny Wisecracker, the comedian most commonly found on the stage. Let's face it, he's not really good. Along with Johnny are NPCs Phil and Colter, two regulars here at the club.

So come on down to the Chuckle Bucket! Come for the jokes, stay for the food!

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 04:03 PM
Truck walks in and shows the man at the admissions desk a video of posts 215-241 at trogs tavern.

blackout
2007-06-16, 04:39 PM
The man blinks.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 04:41 PM
*truck starts blinking repeatedly*



fig hid ft USCG fifed iffy edging Dubhe GUI AFDC agog!

thehothead
2007-06-16, 04:43 PM
An NPC stares at Truck, then starts laughing so hard he falls out of his chair, However, he's a regular, and everyone knows he has ADHD and his medicine is wearing off.

blackout
2007-06-16, 04:46 PM
Man: Hmmm...Alright, your in. That'll be 20 GPs.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 04:50 PM
((hey, I have ADHD!))

My Mommy says that I should be a swords swallower, but I have an eating problem. I just cant get the sword in my mouth.

*He draws his sword and attempts to swallow it, but misses his face completely*

((Did you read the posts in trogs tavern? If you did you will know his origin))

blackout
2007-06-16, 04:56 PM
Man: ...*snickers a bit*That's pretty good, kid. Ok, your in. In about two hours. Johnny's gonna soften up the crowd for ya.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 05:02 PM
Is he going to hit them over the head with a club or battle axe? Also I want a sausage.

thehothead
2007-06-16, 05:02 PM
((I have adhd too. That NPC is actually based on my friend, who is at his worst when his medicine is wearing off))

blackout
2007-06-16, 05:04 PM
Man: *cracks up*Your hilarious kid!

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 05:18 PM
I'm not hilarious, I'm a real boy.

blackout
2007-06-16, 05:19 PM
Man: *cracks up and falls over, trying to breathe*

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 05:22 PM
My big brothere says that I can breath better if i pock a hole in my neck. Preferably near my voice box. Maybe it will work for you too!


*He draws his sword*

Do you want to do it or should I?

blackout
2007-06-16, 05:25 PM
Man: :smalleek: *crawls away*

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 05:30 PM
*Tereal walks in*

There you are truck! Come on lets go.

Sir please send the security on this man.

blackout
2007-06-16, 05:35 PM
Man: But...he hasn't done anything.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 05:40 PM
Truck come on...

He is forcing me to do some thing against my will.

blackout
2007-06-16, 05:43 PM
Men: It's only forcing you if he tries to actually drag you along with him.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 05:53 PM
*Truck laches on to Tereals arm and falls on floor*

Help! Help! he is dragging me!

Well if you want to be dragged so much.

*Tereal drags him across he floor*


now get him trouble! Now get him in trouble!

blackout
2007-06-16, 05:57 PM
A half-dozen security guards immediately charge at him, wielding nightsticks.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 06:04 PM
*Tereal draws his sword. It takes him about ten seconds to subdue them all. They are not killed, just subdued.*

fine you can stay! How long until the show?

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:11 PM
Man: About 45 minutes. Why?

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 06:12 PM
I'm just guessing my brother is in it.

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:15 PM
Man: And your right. By the way, 20 GPs for joining the show. If the crowd likes him, he gets some of tonight's profits.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 06:17 PM
I get profit! Profit profit profit! wait, whats profit? is it a kind of cheese?

I hate being his brother.

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:19 PM
Man: Profit is money, kid. And something tells me that you'll walk away from tonight's show with alot of money...now, about that entry fee.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 06:26 PM
Do we both need to pay?

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:38 PM
Man: Nah. Just him.

Raistlin1040
2007-06-16, 06:41 PM
A rogue with a bandana walks into the place.
"Funnies eh? I've got my fair share of funny stories"

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 06:43 PM
Hugh fight fjord hog db fjord Hedvig haded fad Judaic Kevan.

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:48 PM
Man: Excellent, you can go on after the kid here. *points at the guy with the ADHD*

Raistlin1040
2007-06-16, 06:50 PM
The rogue smiles.
"I hope there aren't any paladins in the audiance"

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:51 PM
Man: Nah, paladins wouldn't be caught dead in here. Stick-up-the-ass-itis tends to dull the sense of humor.

Raistlin1040
2007-06-16, 06:54 PM
He chuckles.
"Good."

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 06:55 PM
Why? asks truck

possibly its because they dont have a sense of humor. answers Tereal

or maybe its because they are hunting him because he is a criminal!


yes! that must be it!


Well, as you know I am a genius.

*Tereal rolls his eyes*


yes as I know so well. I really am pride to know one off the greatest scientific minds of the century.

blackout
2007-06-16, 06:55 PM
Man: Kid! Your on in five! What's your name again?

Johnny Wisecracker comes off the stage, being booed at.

Johnny: Hey, rookie, I softened them up for ya! Good luck!

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 07:02 PM
*Truck walks out in an orange super hero costume with a picture of a truck on his chest*

Believe it or not I'm walking on air, I never thought i could fell so freeee! (Yeah for Greatest American hero references!)

*He umps of the stage*

I Believe I can fly!

*He falls flat on his face*

Ow!

blackout
2007-06-16, 07:04 PM
Announcer: Let's give it up for...Truck? His name's Truck?

People start laughing.

Nightwing
2007-06-16, 07:06 PM
I'm not a truck! I'm a real boy!


((Dead time. Dont go onto the next show. I should be back later.))

blackout
2007-06-16, 07:12 PM
People: *crack up*

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:08 AM
*He hops back up on stage, and draws his sword*

I will now swallow this sword.

*he tries to sallow it but he misses his face completely*

Oh yeah, I forgot, I have an eating problem!

Emperor Ing
2007-06-17, 05:37 AM
Tre walks in, and takes a seat.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:46 AM
My next trick will be juggling knives! This is very dangerous.

*he stars juggling and almost immediately drops one on his foot*

Ow ow ow!


*He falls of the stage and lands right in front of a man with a cigar. The man is startled and drops his cigar on truck, witch lights Trucks cape on fire. he runs around in circles with a flaming cape*

Emperor Ing
2007-06-17, 05:48 AM
Tre cracks up

thehothead
2007-06-17, 05:49 AM
NPC Colter (The guy whose medicine is perpeptually wearing off) falls out of his chair laughing.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:51 AM
Some one give me some milk!

thehothead
2007-06-17, 05:53 AM
NPC Colter is now rolling around on the floor.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:55 AM
Help! help! I neeed milk!

thehothead
2007-06-17, 05:56 AM
NPC Colter faints from lack of oxygen. However, this only lasts for a few minutes, and then he starts laughing at the words "Are you Ok?"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:59 AM
Some one get me some milk!

*His cape is still on fire*

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:03 AM
NPC phil, who is NPC colter's brother hands over some milk, then readies a bucket of water.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:06 AM
*He drinks the milk*


Oh thank god! I was getting a bit dehydrated there. Now can you guys do some thing about this cape?

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:10 AM
NPC phil hands over the bucket of water, and NPC Colter has finally calmed down. His medicine has now worn off, and he's not much different then when it's in full effect. he laughs at somethings people might giggle at, but seems normal.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:13 AM
*Truck drinks the bucket of water*


Thanks. Now can you do some thing about this cape?


((Can some one please control the audience? I want to know if they laugh or not.))

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:17 AM
(OK)
The audience is a bit weirded out right now, but they have laughed at a few things.

NPC Phil get's another bucket of water, and dumps it on Truck, extinguishing the flames.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:22 AM
What was that for?! you cant drink water from with a cape you Know!

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:23 AM
"The fire is gone now"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:31 AM
*A man walks in with a gun and a bag*

"OK rich guys put the money in the bag."


Never fear! super Truck is here!


*he runs at the man, sword drawn.The man fires a bullet, but truck, who is wet, slips and dodges the bullet. Truck stand up and accidental stabs the robber in the arm.*

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:41 AM
Everyone applauds.

NPC colter looks bored, and NPC phil looks glad that his brother's medicine is done wearing off.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:45 AM
Thank you, Thank you! that concludes my show. I will be here all week, and the week after that, and the week after that , and so on and so forth.

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:48 AM
((Thats good, because I have to go to bed. 4:50 AM here.))

metakirb
2007-06-17, 07:12 AM
Waddle Dee runs in

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 07:19 AM
*truck looks at waddle Dee*

You missed the show but you can have a video of it.

*He hands him a video of posts 38-61*

metakirb
2007-06-17, 10:37 AM
Waddle Dee grabs it and runs off

Emperor Ing
2007-06-17, 12:54 PM
Tre walks out, clearly satisfied

blackout
2007-06-17, 03:57 PM
Man: Let's give a big hand for Truck, everyone! *motions for the rogue-guy to go up on stage*

thehothead
2007-06-17, 04:00 PM
(Add NPC Colter and NPC Phil to the places description. They're cool.)

blackout
2007-06-17, 04:07 PM
((Done and done. :) ))

Raistlin1040
2007-06-17, 04:49 PM
The rogue casually walks onstage.
"Hiya. How you all doing tonight?"
He pauses.
"So, I've done my fair share of adventuring, and being a rogue is a pretty good job. Not much fighting, more shorthanding your companions. Am I right? Yeah, so this one time, I adventured with a paladin."
He pauses to let that fact sink in.
"And we were supposed to go clear out some generic dungeon of a bunch of evil creatures. In the last adventure, we'd found a wand of fireballs. So we see this huge, monstrous even, troll and the paladin just lunges at him. We beat him down, but you need to burn trolls to actually kill them. So the paladin takes the wand and says some religious crap about how he will "cleanse the earth of this houl creature". So he tries to use the wand, and it just bam! Blows up right in his face. But seriously folks, do you know what I love about paladins? They are just so twisted in logic. Am I right? Like, they can justify anything with the gods as their reason. You killed a begger by mistake? Clearly the gods thought him unworthy of a happy existance, so you were being merciful by killing him. Knocked up a princess? Clearly the child will be a great force for good and be smiled upon by the gods. Hell, got your companions killed? They weren't LG and not favored by the gods."

thehothead
2007-06-17, 04:53 PM
NPC Colter, whose medicine is wearing off again (Which is weird 'cause he hasn't taken any sence the last time it did), only kinda laughs.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 04:54 PM
*a paladin stands up*

"you lie unholy monster! you should pray to your gods that I am merciful in my just act of cleansing the earth of you monster!"

*He draws his sword and attacks the rogue*

Raistlin1040
2007-06-17, 04:56 PM
The rogue sidesteps the attack.
"See what I'm saying folks? Give it up for Generic Paladin over here. Isn't he a great sport?"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 04:57 PM
*He swings three attacks at him with his sword*

thehothead
2007-06-17, 04:58 PM
Now NPC colter starts laughing. However, that's probably the violence itself.

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 05:00 PM
Mr. Tenny BeMorton Plods, who has appeared in the audience at the random whim of his player, only starts laughing when the Paladin begins attacking the Rogue. It's unsure whether the laughter was triggered by the stupidity of the Paladin, or the knowledge that one of them will die before the end of the routine.

thehothead
2007-06-17, 05:02 PM
Shiv Lightly walks in and takes a seat.

Raistlin1040
2007-06-17, 05:04 PM
The rogue laughs along with the crowd and dodges the attacks again.
"I'm CG. Maybe if he kills me, he'll lose his powers.''

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:07 PM
"I will not lose my powers vanquishing evil! It is what the twelve gods intended me to do!"

Raistlin1040
2007-06-17, 05:08 PM
"Then detect evil on me. I dare you. Or are you too scared?"

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:09 PM
Another paladin walks in
"Don't tell me your acting like Miko again!"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:12 PM
*the palidan stops and takes off his Miko wig*

"sorry joe. She was cool."

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:13 PM
"If you keep this up, it's latrine duty for a year!"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:16 PM
"I know. I just never get to say "Smight Evil". I'm always on guard duty."

blackout
2007-06-17, 05:17 PM
The crowd starts cracking up at the paladin.

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:21 PM
"Well, if you don't stop, you'll be saying 'Smite Crap' a lot for the next year!"

thehothead
2007-06-17, 05:22 PM
Shiv smiles at this.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:24 PM
"yes sir."

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:25 PM
The paladin turns to the crowd
"We hope you've enjoyed our spontaneus act of humor"
He grabs the other paladin by the ear and drags them out.

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 05:27 PM
Plods seems sort of disappointed when the paladin is dragged away. He orders a bucket of popcorn and pulls over one of the workers. " 'Scuse me, I'd like to perform a routine."

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:28 PM
"Can I keep my toy katana and sappier guard costume?''

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:30 PM
"No. And I'm taking away those magazines you're ordering them from."

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:33 PM
"Then how will I get my Elan costume for Halloween?"

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:35 PM
"I'm placing a mass order. This year you're Redcloak. I'm Xykon, Bill is MiTD, and everyone else with a name is part of the Fiendish Wooly Mammoth. Everyone without a name is a nameless hobgoblin soldier."

thehothead
2007-06-17, 05:35 PM
Hey you guys are Palidins right? Do either of you have information on two certain... Paul Blood and Huston

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:37 PM
"sweet! I get to be redcloak!''

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:40 PM
"Did I mention that they ran out of Redcloak costumes, and are replacing them with bunny suits?"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:40 PM
" Darn it to heck! Sorry we cant swear. we are paladins."

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:42 PM
They have walked all around the world and are back on stage. He stops walking.
"I have something to tell you."

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:48 PM
"what? Is I cool!"

blackout
2007-06-17, 05:48 PM
The man turns to Plods. "Yes, feel free to perform a routine."

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:49 PM
"I... am your father!"
His clothes turn black, and he cuts off the other paladin's head hand.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:50 PM
"Noooooooooo!"

*He is Plastic sword and his hand fall of the stage*

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 05:50 PM
"Okey doke. It costs money, right?" He begins fishing around in his unrealistically deep pockets for some kind of currency.

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 05:53 PM
"Oh, quit whining. SMITE GOOD!"
He smites the other hand.

blackout
2007-06-17, 05:56 PM
Man: 20 GPs.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 05:57 PM
*he costume suddenly turns all black. With his cut off other hand, witch has regrown as a mechanical hand, he pulls a green lightsaber from his pocket and blocks the attack.*

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 06:01 PM
The sword becomes a lightsaber, and energy comes from both ends. Grinning, the blackguard Vader pulls another red double saber, then grows two more hands, and pulls out two more red double sabers.
"Your screwed."
He starts attacking with all eight sabers.

thehothead
2007-06-17, 06:02 PM
They both suffer a random existance failure caused by the existance of a Douglas adams inspired character being nearby.

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 06:05 PM
Plods begins tossing coins at random from his pockets into the man's hand, all of which eventually add up to twenty. He looks up at the dueling relatives, wondering if it's some kind of bizarre Father's Day tradition to cut off your son's hand, and then glances at the man. "Do you think I can just start now...?"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:05 PM
*he turnes into Obi-wan and blocks all the attacks. He then chops the light sabers in half and then shoots him in the stomach with a blaster. He toses the blast to the ground and says: " how uncivilized"

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 06:07 PM
Obi-Wan missed. The sabers keep flashing
"Don't you get it? In this Town, I'm the good guy!"

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:10 PM
*thousands of Jedi run in and start cutting the man with many light sabers to bits*

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 06:29 PM
Plods takes the silence as a 'yes, by all means' and floats up onto the stage, still stuffing popcorn into his mouth.
It should be mentioned at this point that Plods looks absolutely ridiculous. He's wearing a black and white vertical-striped robe, and both sides of his ropey white mustache hang all the way to the ground. He munches on his buttery, high-cholesterol snack and watches the audience appraisingly.
"So..."
He takes a step backwards.
"There was this one universe, you see.
"It was called the Universe of-" He pronounces an unpronouncable sound that sounds very similar to a chicken trying to shove its head into a cheese grater whilst stepping around in a deep vat of pudding. "-and in this Universe, everybody was exactly the same. Everybody did the exact same thing, on the exact same day, wore the exact same clothes. They would even ignore you so they could do the exact same thing every day. You'd ask them the time and they'd blow you off so they could get to their dentist appointment at exactly 10:05 AM, just like yesterday." He stuffs another fistful of popcorn into his mouth and swallows noisily. "Yeah, they were jerks.
"So I decided to see what would happen if you broke the cycle and made someone do something differently. So I ran up to this one guy and punched him in the face.
"So...he died.
"Nobody cared, of course, they couldn't have, or else they might have stopped and said something and broke the stupid cycle. It must have been a very boring life for all of them.
"So...I did them all a favor and sucked them into a temporal vortex between the threads of reality."
He munches on his popcorn, as if he didn't notice that he said something very strange.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:32 PM
"booo!" scream the audience.

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 06:38 PM
The audience members suddenly find themselves trying to pull from their hair wet, wriggling, salmon.
Plods laughs. "Well, y'all should be laughing at that. I know I thought it was funny."
"See, I've always wondered: exactly what is the problem with whales? I mean, geez, how could those come about? They blow water out of a hole on their back, their teeth are actually long pieces of string for catching microscopic animals, and their eyes are the size of basketballs!" He chuckles. "They work just as well as basketballs, too; I shot a three-pointer last night with one of them."

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:39 PM
*The audience laughs*

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 06:46 PM
"And what about monkeys? They seem to take some sort of twisted, fiendish satisfaction from flinging their crap at you! I, myself, take it as a sign from the higher powers that created the universe, but you can also see it as some kind of sick, childish obsession. And to prove my point, heeere's Johnny!"
Out of his unrealistically deep pocket crawls a howler monkey. It begins screeching at the top of its lungs, and then it flings itself into the crowd, upturning an NPC's drink and dumping it onto his head.

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 06:48 PM
*the NPCs laugh even harder*

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 06:54 PM
"And while we're at it, what about moutain goats? Goats in general, even? They can somehow digest nails, rusty cans, whichever! It's like some kind of invulnerability; I mean, after mankind has wiped itself from the face of the earth, and destroyed nearly all of the natural resources, goats will still have mountains of old metal crap to go through!"
He pulls two sock puppets strongly resembling goats from his pockets and they begin having a conversation.
Steve: "Biiilllyy....I found an old car to chew through!"
Billy: "Great...I call the hood, the headlights, and the engine!"
Steve: "That's no fair...fine, I get the roof and the coolant tank!"
He stuffs the goats back into his left pocket and pulls an actual mountain goat from his right. It wails loudly, and he cups a hand over its mouth.
"May I have a volunteer! Yes, I need a volunteer! You, sir! Toss me that mug!" He catches an iron mug thrown from the audience and offers it to the goat, who begins chewing on it.
The monkey wreaks further havoc.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 07:05 PM
A drow walks into the club and, seeing the havoc, asks "Is this a comedy club or a zoo?"

blackout
2007-06-17, 07:18 PM
Man: *steps up onto the stage*Sir, I'm afraid I'll have to ask your animals to leave.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 07:23 PM
"Well, I have to admit it's funny. The wierd funny, not the haha funny." Raril turns to the man. "So is this place just for laughs, or do you allow other acts?"

blackout
2007-06-17, 07:26 PM
Man: ...why do you ask? :smalleek:

Nightwing
2007-06-17, 07:27 PM
*the audience laughs at the goats*

The Sentinel
2007-06-17, 07:37 PM
Plods glares at the man, but reluctantly calls the animals back up onto the stage. "Come on, Sheiba. Joey." The monkey and goat hang their heads and waddle back up to their master, who promptly stuffs them into his pocket. Mr. Plods waves to the audience with a toothy grin. "Thanks, thanks. I'll be here...well, not all week...probably whenever I feel like it. See y'around!"
He steps down off the stage, laughing to himself. "That...was funny."

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 07:40 PM
A guitar is suddenly summoned into the Drow's hands. He plays a chord and grins at the man.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 07:43 PM
Osnagard walks into the club and walks over to Raril and the man. "He's quite good you know, Then to Raril "Sorry 'bout that unexpected trip This One had to take."

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 07:49 PM
Raril laughs, "Thanks for the endorsement. I hope everything went alright?"

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 07:51 PM
"Quite well indeed, the grass has been decapitated and rations succesfully stored."

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 07:53 PM
"Haha. Not bad, ever think of trying the spotlight yourself?" He gestures to the stage.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 07:56 PM
"Never, This One is not cut out for that, besides It was being serious." He looks confused as to what Raril thought was funny.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 07:59 PM
Raril frowns, "Ah, well then I hope no one resurrects your lawn."

Vhaidara
2007-06-17, 07:59 PM
Dakel keeps following Raril.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 08:01 PM
"If they won't let you sing, just get yourself a pupet, between throwing your voice and Lillith you'll be a hit." Osnagard says, his smile finally breaking out.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 08:04 PM
"There's an idea. I'm good at making Raril look like a fool"
"Hey!"
"What? you know I'm right."
Raril sighs and accepts the truth.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 08:11 PM
"Well now, wouldn't say that..."
Osnagard doesn't quite know how to approach this without offending one or the other.. but the words that almost left his lips were along the lines of.. "Well you would have to be playing the Dummy for that." Fair enough to say, that would probably have been a bad idea.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 08:18 PM
"Well it would definately be funny, but I will not sink to such levels and insult myself, or to allow Lillith to insult me."
"Aww..but I like insulting you. Still, a puppet would be a little cheesy, even for you Raril."
"I'm not much of a comedian anyways. Music is my thing."

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 08:25 PM
"Comedy isn't that hard, you simply make whtty obsevartion or quick re-thoughts." Osnagard ponders this for a moment, unfortunalty nothing comes to mind.

"How about those... What's the story with them... Y'ALL WATCH THIS.", he finally screams as a zombie riding a motorcycle attemps to jump seven helicopters and fails miserably getting chopped up half way through. "Well he was a flop."

blackout
2007-06-17, 08:27 PM
Man: Alright, fine. You can go up and play, just stop freaking me out.

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 08:32 PM
An NPC walks into the Chuckle Bucket and carries a bunch of fliers with him. He pays the man at the door but he says that it's against club rules to hand out or post fliers, but he can put one up outside the club and the rest can go on a table near the entrance.

The man complies and, since his working shift is over, he decides to sit in the audience and watch the show.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 08:32 PM
"Just because I speak through the Drow here doesn't make me freaky"
"And having an angry woman living in me doesn't..you know what? Yes, yes it does."
"Hey!"
Raril chuckles and takes the stage.
"Any requests?"

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 08:35 PM
"Do you know No Threat by The Tragically Hip?"

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 08:35 PM
The NPC laughs at the drow and says "That guy shore can do a good ventriloquist act." Then he takes a seat.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 08:38 PM
((Why did I play a bard when I don't know any music? *sigh*))

"Umm..no. Can you humm a few bars?" He then turns to the NPC in the crowd, throwing his voice so that it comes from right next to the man. "And that was no act, if it were I'd have a puppet."

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 08:41 PM
The man laughs again and then whispers to another man next to him "He's still faking it. I wonder what he's going to do during his singing act." to which the listening gentlemen gives a chuckle.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 08:44 PM
http://video.google.ca/videoplay?docid=-3674320544469729225&q=No+Threat+-+The+Tragically+hip&total=2&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=0

((would you beleive that I couldn't find a good quality version of it, stupid Canadian Cult band... and best musicians on the planet))

Osnagard hums a few bars, unfortunatly they're scratchy and hard to make out.

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 08:47 PM
Raril manages to rock the guitar part fairly well, but he bumbles through the lyrics.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 08:51 PM
((HUZZAH! Go Hip :D, what I'm allowed to be fanatical))

Osnagard cheers, whistles and claps wildly. "Try Poets next."

((I found the actualy video for it Poets (http://video.google.ca/videoplay?docid=-3099104161870197937&q=The+Tragically+Hip+-+Poets&total=32&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=0)))

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 08:57 PM
((What's with all the cats in the video?))

Raril plays the song. This time he gets the lyrics right.
"So what's next?"
"You could let me sing."
"We could even do a duet." The bard grins at this new possibility.

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 09:01 PM
The crowd shouts and cries "Duet! Duet Duet!"

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 09:05 PM
((ooh why do I open my mouth? Must think of song...will probably be lame.*desperately searches internet*))

"Alright, I'll play a duet."
"Do any of you have a suggestion?"

((I'll actually type out some of the lyrics if I can, just to show the split))

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:08 PM
((Havn't a clue, they're just cool like that, last one form me Blow At High Dough (http://video.google.ca/videoplay?docid=-8614134074875183660&q=The+Tragically+Hip+Blow+At+High+Dough&total=31&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=7)))

This time more than one member of the audiance applauds

((oops, that's not a duet))

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 09:11 PM
Raril shrugs and plays Osnagard's request while his player continues to search for music.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:12 PM
The entire crowd Stands and Cheers. They've simply gone wild.

((Why does Paradise By The Dashboard Lights - Meatloaf come to mind as being perfect for Raril and Lillith))

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 09:23 PM
((Hmm...I don't know, I was thinking something more classic.))

Raril begins to tap his foot and play the guitar, then launches into Aint No Mountain High Enough (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6863367896706357688&q=Music-+Aint+no+mountain+high+enough&total=71&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=2), strangely shifting to a woman's voice whenever appropriate. Lillith decides to get in on the act, also shifting his form to match the voices. The male Drow suddenly turning into a human woman and back again should be rather interesting to watch.

((It was the first song to come into my head))

blackout
2007-06-17, 09:29 PM
The crowd goes wild...and is slightly wierded out by the shapeshifting.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:33 PM
((haha, way to pick the one part of the musical spectrum I'm not a fan of... well maybe not the "one".. if it was country bad things may have happened :P))

Osnagard claps and cheers, Raril is putting on a very good show.

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 09:37 PM
The NPC comments "He's an illusionist too? This guy's incredible!"

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 09:38 PM
((Really? heh, Well that's the era my music background comes from, as my parents controlled the radio dial while I was impressionable.))

The guitar dissappears, Raril takes a bow, and then steps off stage.
"Well that was fun."
"Yeah, actually, it was."
"Nice touch with the shapeshifting"
"Thank you"
He walks up to Osnagard. "So what now? Do you want to give it a shot?"

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:42 PM
"Haha, very good indeed, no thanks, This One isn't much for the public's eye."

As he finnishes talking some random creature that he summoned waddles onto the stage and starts sining about Pi (http://pi.ytmnd.com/).

((yeah, I got more of the Rock scene from dad, and developed a taste for clasical/instumental on my own.))

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 09:46 PM
"Why is it saying a bunch of random numbers?"
"That's not random! That's PI! This could take a while.
"How long?"
"Forever."

((I love pi and pie, total math nerd here :smallbiggrin: ))

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 09:48 PM
(( That Pi song is too hysterical. ))

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:49 PM
((Haha, I just wish that was the full song instead of just a clip of it, that's the first part, then it starts to fade and goes to a rap, then goes back to that for a ridiculissly long time))

"Ahh Pi, there should be a church of Pi."

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 09:54 PM
"You could start one, I've heard rumors that some of the Town's temples have stopped operating. It might need a replacement." The drow grins wickedly.

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:57 PM
"Hmm, that's a excelent idea, This One can demand the sacrifice of followers first born child, and then their second born, and then anymore that follow, and when they run out of childern they can sacrifice themselves... all for the greater good of Pi!", He smiles at the thought, "Nah, it'd never work.. This One hasn't got a clue how to bake."

thehothead
2007-06-17, 09:57 PM
(Hey osnagard, how's it going finding that "group" of con-artists and figuring out what "activities" they've been doing?)

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 09:58 PM
((not very, considering that I stopped looking :D is it you?? And if so, which thread?? :P ))

thehothead
2007-06-17, 10:00 PM
((Yup, it's me. You're going to have to wait until I actually start conning someone for me to be traceable.))

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 10:00 PM
"Umm..I can bake. But please no sacrafices..I nearly died that way, once."

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 10:00 PM
((Haha, well that's the problem right there.. nothing's happened yet :D))

Edit

"No, it's best not to do such things. Glad you thought it was a good idea though."

thehothead
2007-06-17, 10:05 PM
((I almost got to do something, but then Baron Law showed back up. And when I do start doing something, it will actually end up being hard to detect as a scam. Imagine a con artist who sell someone something without realizing it does what he say's it does.))

Admiral_Kelly
2007-06-17, 10:08 PM
(( Lori has started a new business. Your charachter could try making her company out to be a group of con-artists. ))

Osnagard
2007-06-17, 10:15 PM
There is a resounding crack and a rift in the universe opens, pouring deadtime all over Osnagard (G'Night)

Artemis97
2007-06-17, 10:16 PM
(Goodnight)

With a final bow to the crowd, Raril exits to the street.

blackout
2007-06-17, 11:08 PM
Man: Ok, next person, up.

Vhaidara
2007-06-18, 04:08 PM
Shadowbow walks in and looks for Tereal.

Nightwing
2007-06-18, 04:09 PM
*Tereal waves two shadow bow*

Vhaidara
2007-06-18, 04:10 PM
I need you to come outside with me.

LordVader
2007-06-18, 04:11 PM
(( Lori has started a new business. Your charachter could try making her company out to be a group of con-artists. ))
((I think the Thieves Guild takes a dim view of freelancers.))

Nightwing
2007-06-18, 04:13 PM
*Tereal stands up and walks out side.*

Vhaidara
2007-06-18, 04:14 PM
Shadowbow follows.

Nightwing
2007-06-18, 04:14 PM
((I will be in the streets thread.))

thehothead
2007-06-18, 05:59 PM
((I think the Thieves Guild takes a dim view of freelancers.))
((Yes they do. I decided one of their numerous NPCs had probably heard rumors of a certain clever con artist coming into town. This somehow got interpreted as a group of con artists who were already at work.))

Osnagard
2007-06-18, 06:45 PM
Osnagard snaps out of deadtime and heads out towards Trog's.

metakirb
2007-06-20, 01:33 PM
Skrall walks in and leaves a leaflet, it reads:

"Join the mighty space pirate army, unlock the secrets of the mighty chemical phazon, to apply come to the underground base and ask for Skrall at the entrance"

He then leaves