I killed my DMs waifu

[Anonymouswizard]

I keep on scrolling past this thread, misreading the last word as "wife", and doing a double-take.

What does it say about me that I'm less horrifiedif the title ends in wife than if it ends in waifu?


I had a DM that did this sort of thing. What these DMs never realize is that players immediately pick up on this kind of DMPC and instinctively try to kill it, and that protecting such DMPCs with plot armor just makes the instinct worse.

My DM doesn't realise 'operation: kill the DMPC' is still being planned, I think a half-orc lore Bard will let me do it.

[8BitNinja]

What does it say about me that I'm less horrified if the title ends in wife than if it ends in waifu?

It means that you are normal. According to Urban Dictionary a Waifu is:

"A term coined by Otaku ... for their 2D significant others; predominantly anime and video game characters. A Waifu, in contrast to a harem, is the love between one man and his one and only Waifu."

And a wife implies a real woman

[SethoMarkus]

It means that you are normal. According to Urban Dictionary a Waifu is:

"A term coined by Otaku ... for their 2D significant others; predominantly anime and video game characters. A Waifu, in contrast to a harem, is the love between one man and his one and only Waifu."

And a wife implies a real woman

Except that thwn would mean the OP killed a real life person opposed to a fictional object (subject?) of fantasy. If the OP killed his DMs wife, that is.

[8BitNinja]

Except that thwn would mean the OP killed a real life person opposed to a fictional object (subject?) of fantasy. If the OP killed his DMs wife, that is.

Precisely, and that is why spelling, literally saves lives

[goto124]

While it may be technically less useful as a measuring system, the imperial system the US uses works juuuuust well enough for people not to ditch it for being too useless, and is ingrained in our education/upbringing enough that replacing it would be quite the chore. It may not be technically the most useless measuring system, but it's the worst by virtue of being diabolically difficult to replace with a new system.

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/degrees.png
"Radians Fahrenheit or radians Celsius?" "Uh, sorry, gotta go!"

[Vinyadan]

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/degrees.png
"Radians Fahrenheit or radians Celsius?" "Uh, sorry, gotta go!"

Not again, this is turning into the old monk discussions.

[Anonymouswizard]

Not again, this is turning into the old monk discussions.

Wait, Monks are underpowered? How? :smalltongue:

[8BitNinja]

https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/degrees.png
"Radians Fahrenheit or radians Celsius?" "Uh, sorry, gotta go!"

This is the forum equivalent of grave digging

[Winter_Wolf]

This is the forum equivalent of grave digging

Would you rather leave it to rot in the sun and attract carrion feeders? :biggrin:

[8BitNinja]

Would you rather leave it to rot in the sun and attract carrion feeders? :biggrin:

I'm sorry, what I meant to say was grave robbing

[Kelb_Panthera]

I'm sorry, what I meant to say was grave robbing

Hey now, we're Adventures. We use the term "treasure hunting."

[GAAD]

Hey now, we're Adventures. We use the term "treasure hunting."

Ooo! An actual Adventure? Nice! How many modules do you have and what's your recommended level range?

[Lvl 2 Expert]

Ooo! An actual Adventure? Nice! How many modules do you have and what's your recommended level range?

Ladies, my one module is all you'll ever need. I'm suitable for a party of two to eight women, challenge rating rawwr.




:smalleek:

[Segev]

Ladies, my one module is all you'll ever need. I'm suitable for a party of two to eight women, challenge rating rawwr.




:smalleek:

Well! Now we know what he's a level 2 expert in, don't we?

[Kelb_Panthera]

Ooo! An actual Adventure? Nice! How many modules do you have and what's your recommended level range?

Sorry, I'm homebrewed. :smallwink:

[8BitNinja]

Ladies, my one module is all you'll ever need. I'm suitable for a party of two to eight women, challenge rating rawwr.




:smalleek:

Eight? :smallconfused:

[Kelb_Panthera]

Eight? :smallconfused:

Eight. :smallwink:

[AvatarVecna]

Sorry, I'm homebrewed. :smallwink:

I guess it's appropriate to ask you how balanced you are then? :smalltongue:

[Pyrous]

Eight? :smallconfused:

Lvl 2 Expert, not Bard.

[Kelb_Panthera]

I guess it's appropriate to ask you how balanced you are then? :smalltongue:

Unfortunately, the consensus seems to be that I'm just a little unbalanced. :smallbiggrin:

[Douche]

I have no idea what you guys are talking about anymore.

I do think it's funny how many people focused so hard on the lexicon I chose to use. Whats the big deal about saying waifu?

I've noticed that a lot of people on this forum seek to understand social behavior in a strange way. Like, just the fact that people feel the need to highlight sarcasm in blue. Never seen that before. Do you really need a special cue for that?

[Kelb_Panthera]

I have no idea what you guys are talking about anymore.

I do think it's funny how many people focused so hard on the lexicon I chose to use. Whats the big deal about saying waifu?

I've noticed that a lot of people on this forum seek to understand social behavior in a strange way. Like, just the fact that people feel the need to highlight sarcasm in blue. Never seen that before. Do you really need a special cue for that?

Yes. The subtleties of speech can make picking up sarcasm difficult, sometimes, and without tone or body language to read it becomes even more difficult.

Also, that's displaying social behavior, not seeking to understand it.

Who focused on the fact you used the term waifu? A few people didn't recognize the term and asked for clarification. That's it. Some people saw, or thought they saw, recognizable speech patterns from a different board and made some inferences from that but that's just what it is; people expect patterns and sometimes see them whether there's anything to it or not.

[8BitNinja]

Lvl 2 Expert, not Bard.

Still, I'm pretty sure eight is a hard number to manage

[Anonymouswizard]

Ladies, my one module is all you'll ever need. I'm suitable for a party of two to eight women, challenge rating rawwr.




:smalleek:

Just women? Please, my module is for a party of two to six men and women, gotta keep the group balanced :smallwink:

[8BitNinja]

Just women? Please, my module is for a party of two to six men and women, gotta keep the group balanced :smallwink:

No one ever plays my module :smallfrown:

[Anonymouswizard]

No one ever plays my module :smallfrown:

Eh, around here nobody can get a decent party together :smalltongue:

Yeah, it sucks less when you realise that people saying that you need to get people to play your module are just ego stroking. Also, in all seriousness, to keep it going, I haven't had to remove my modules shrink wrap yet. Just let it go.

[8BitNinja]

Eh, around here nobody can get a decent party together :smalltongue:

Yeah, it sucks less when you realise that people saying that you need to get people to play your module are just ego stroking. Also, in all seriousness, to keep it going, I haven't had to remove my modules shrink wrap yet. Just let it go.

I think this thread is just turning into one giant innuendo

[GAAD]

TurnING? I'm pretty sure it is completely turned at this point.

TURN UNDEAD!

[goto124]

BOLSTER UNDEAD!

Who'll be the third one?

[8BitNinja]

I join in TURN UNDEAD.

[goto124]

Alright, I shall do this.

STAB UNDEAD!

[Anonymouswizard]

TurnING? I'm pretty sure it is completely turned at this point.

TURN UNDEAD!

Congratulations, you are now a Wight.

[Segev]

Pff. Amatures.

Command Undead

[Jormengand]

Rebuke undead!

Now that we've used all of the X undead abilities, can we please resume saving the world thread topic?

[Douche]

Seriously, guys... What are you talking about? Why are we turning and rebuking undead?

[Anonymouswizard]

Seriously, guys... What are you talking about? Why are we turning and rebuking undead?

I don't know, something to do with someone's module or the like. Seriously, it's not worth using necromancy on it.

[GAAD]

Congratulations, you are now a Wight.

No, I am clearly a Wrogng.

[Vinyadan]

Seriously, guys... What are you talking about? Why are we turning and rebuking undead?

Right, I think this thread counts more like some sort of ever-growing, ever-changing chaos beast.

So, uh... dictum?

[8BitNinja]

Right, I think this thread counts more like some sort of ever-growing, ever-changing chaos beast.

This thread is a creature formed from the ether of the planes of chaos

[Douche]

This thread is a creature formed from the ether of the planes of chaos

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

[GAAD]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

Really? Everything just sort of boiled over? But we've been watching you SO HARD. :smallfrown:

[Talakeal]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

I can guarantee that I for one would listen. I can't promise I won't judge or doubt, but I would certainly listen; this has been one of the most interesting gaming stories I have heard in a long time.

[The Glyphstone]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

You're not allowed to just leave us hanging like that. The thread has descended into madness because we're all bored, waiting on tenterhooks for the next chapter of your gamer's drama.

[Lvl 2 Expert]

Still, I'm pretty sure eight is a hard number to manage

I'm counting on some "intra party conflict". Some PvP, so to say.

[8BitNinja]

I'm counting on some "intra party conflict". Some PvP, so to say.

When do these posts cross the NSFW line?

[Ruslan]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.I would totally listen.

[Winter_Wolf]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

Ah, c'mon. Everyone in the playground is some variation of Myotis lucifigus saliva insane. :wink: Just making our own entertainment while waiting on the next installment of Murder-hobos.

[Kish]

Word of Chaos!

Sure, let's have more waffle stories.

[Lvl 2 Expert]

When do these posts cross the NSFW line?

Probably about a page ago.







On the other hand, SFW is mostly for pictures and stuff, things people can see being all front and central on your screen. Written innuendo, as unsubtle as it may be in this case, does not quite have the same impact, in my personal opinion. Does it cross PG13? I'm not sure actually, this topic does seem a little more blunt than your average conversation with James Bond, even though a lot less people die during it.

[Anonymouswizard]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

If you don't tell us we'll just get more Chaotic. At least if we know we'll quiet down for a day or two.


Also, I'd say this thread very definitely has a 12 rating, although I wouldn't go so far as to label it a 15.

[Gamgee]

What detestable forum dwelers have I stumbled upon? Oh my goodness did someone say chaos!? HERESY!!!!!! For crimes against the forum and unnatural thread necromancy I declare PURGE!!!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEGo41443iI

[8BitNinja]

What detestable forum dwelers have I stumbled upon? Oh my goodness did someone say chaos!? HERESY!!!!!! For crimes against the forum and unnatural thread necromancy I declare PURGE!!!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEGo41443iI

The space marines arrived!

Yay! :smallsmile:

[Gamgee]

The space marines arrived!

Yay! :smallsmile:

Be careful what you ask for.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOX_PF4PBH8

[Segev]

Ah, space marines. I think they need to...change their ways.

>_> <_<

[Anonymouswizard]

The space marines arrived!

Yay! :smallsmile:

You say that now, but it's the Galactic Patridges here to steal your victory.

[Vinyadan]

I wish I had a deranged version of Siri with the voice and personality of a DoW Chaos S. Marine. The game didn't impress me much, but the voice acting was in the beautiful spot of awesome excess https://youtu.be/MPMqzuvTpPI

[Âmesang]

The more I hear about "chaos" …the more I want to recreate the Weavers from Loom.
http://www.schadenfreudestudios.com/backup/pictures/avatars/chaos.png

[TeChameleon]

@Douche: I'm not sure anyone else has any idea what they're talking about anymore, either. :smalltongue:

More seriously, the thread seems to have devolved into a pandemonium of memes, innuendo, jokes, and general lunacy; you can't make much sense of it because there isn't a lot of sense to be found in the first place. And I do think that a lot of the silliness is just people passing the time while waiting for the next bit of actual content (i.e. what happened at your session), so... yeah. Feel free to let us know what's going on.

[AvatarVecna]

I'm more than willing to hear the next part of the story, if only to figure out how to incorporate it into the madness. What happened?


Ah, space marines. I think they need to...change their ways.

>_> <_<

Thinking the established, mainstream order of things needs to change? That's textbook-definition heresy right there...and you can't say you got this far into the thread without knowing what happens to heretics.

[Gamgee]

I'm more than willing to hear the next part of the story, if only to figure out how to incorporate it into the madness. What happened?



Thinking the established, mainstream order of things needs to change? That's textbook-definition heresy right there...and you can't say you got this far into the thread without knowing what happens to heretics.
Want to know what the REAL heresy is?
https://i.warosu.org/data/tg/img/0434/37/1446573745981.jpg

I am a Shas'o in the Tau Empire and main them in the tabletop. Muahahah!


https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B7sGaUiT7yrgeVBBQ3RQdS1IZ0U/view

[Kelb_Panthera]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

There's the line. Now I think this might be an attention seeking thread. Before this it was plausible that you were genuine. This, however, feels like you're goading people to ask for more.

If I'm wrong, I'll be glad to hear what comes next but I'll be taking it with a healthy grain of salt from here in.

[8BitNinja]

Be careful what you ask for.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOX_PF4PBH8

I just like them for their cool stuff

Are those My Little Ponies? HERESY!

[Douche]

There's the line. Now I think this might be an attention seeking thread. Before this it was plausible that you were genuine. This, however, feels like you're goading people to ask for more.

If I'm wrong, I'll be glad to hear what comes next but I'll be taking it with a healthy grain of salt from here in.

I didn't mean to sound that way. People literally said they were hijacking my topic and stopped responding to me earlier in the thread.


Anyway, yesterday we all came prepared with new characters. I made a wizard so that I could be a necromancer like I said I would, but you guys failed to notify me that I can't even animate dead til like level 5. So now I have this character who's pale and skinny, has a wannabe emo goth attitude, and can't even summon a single zombie.

Meanwhile, the other guys in the party made a monk and a fighter. The cleric remained clerical.

The DM made some hamfisted attempts at guiding us back to his intended storyline. Turns out that the lord faked his own death, so really we massacred the town for no reason.

At all y'all's behest, I played along with the DM. The other 2 guys besides the cleric kept looking at me like they were ready to burst out laughing. They probably thought I was trolling the DM into believing I was going with the story, only so I could screw it all up at the opportune moment, so they went along with it. We actually got a lot done there, but I can't help but feel like I disappointed the guys by not giving them a payoff

As predicted, the cleric did steamroll everything. The monk died too.

[Kelb_Panthera]

Ya know there are the summon undead spells in the spell compendium and a few other places (SpC is the most recent.)

They're not much but they're something.

[Marlowe]

I've never been able to take Space Marines seriously after realising that they're scaled-down Zakushttps://41.media.tumblr.com/d73d868e45d01277923c9d95b5c74b7e/tumblr_n7d7zoRPZP1s5oxc0o1_500.jpg

And the other lot are just Goufs.http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RxsSq6A5mj4/UaD_JxpxvuI/AAAAAAABXIE/4MXmcqYt85A/s1600/1+(22).jpg

This is no heresy boy, no heresy.

[The Glyphstone]

Ya know there are the summon undead spells in the spell compendium and a few other places (SpC is the most recent.)

They're not much but they're something.

That was what I was going to suggest, but his group may not have the SpC or Libris Mortis.

@Op: You're into Hard Mode now. See how long you can keep playing along, while simultaneously stringing the other guys along in hopes of the troll-flip payoff they think you are building up towards. But wow, that is a terribly hamfisted swerve back onto the railroad, I agree.

[Kelb_Panthera]

That was what I was going to suggest, but his group may not have the SpC or Libris Mortis.

There's also heroes of horror, ghostwalk, magic of faerun, and player's guide to faerun. I suppose it's possible they have none of the above but lacking the SpC seems..... odd to me after all these years. It was one of the few books that went back into print after the 3e - 4e transition debacle.

To each his own, I guess.

[Anonymouswizard]

Ah, space marines. I think they need to...change their ways.

>_> <_<

Are you saying the Ultramarines aren't perfect? Matt Ward would like words with you.

OP, if you want to get back at him wait a few sessions (until you can get Animate Dead at least) and then do something that will break his world (zombie miners?)

[Fizban]

Who focused on the fact you used the term waifu? A few people didn't recognize the term and asked for clarification. That's it. Some people saw, or thought they saw, recognizable speech patterns from a different board and made some inferences from that but that's just what it is; people expect patterns and sometimes see them whether there's anything to it or not.
I believe that would be me, though it would seem my concerns were unwarranted.

[8BitNinja]

Is this a good time to abandon thread?

[Douche]

There's also heroes of horror, ghostwalk, magic of faerun, and player's guide to faerun. I suppose it's possible they have none of the above but lacking the SpC seems..... odd to me after all these years. It was one of the few books that went back into print after the 3e - 4e transition debacle.

To each his own, I guess.

We're playing 5e


Is this a good time to abandon thread?

Unless you've got anymore sweet mechas to share

I thought we were bros, man. You said I was a nice guy before.

[8BitNinja]

Unless you've got anymore sweet mechas to share

I thought we were bros, man. You said I was a nice guy before.

You are a nice guy, and I have 20 more fresh new spicy mechas parked in my garage.

I got one straight from the makers of Gundam Epyon

[Clistenes]

Somebody should do this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfgs9FRD25M) with Space Marines.

[BWR]

Somebody should do this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfgs9FRD25M) with Space Marines.


There is this (http://knowyourmeme.com/photos/614334-warhammer-40000).
A Very Serious set of additional rules for Space Hulk.

[Gamgee]

You are a nice guy, and I have 20 more fresh new spicy mechas parked in my garage.

I got one straight from the makers of Gundam Epyon

So you know Treize as well then. Show is so badass. Even if its super cheesy.

[8BitNinja]

So you know Treize as well then. Show is so badass. Even if its super cheesy.

I've never watched it, but I've heard a lot about it and I'm going to check it out

[Segev]

Thinking the established, mainstream order of things needs to change? That's textbook-definition heresy right there...and you can't say you got this far into the thread without knowing what happens to heretics.

You have passed the test of loyalty...for now. Though your inability to detect the depth of the heresy has disqualified you from the inquisition.

[Nerd-o-rama]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

People are invested in your story, and bored. This is the internet. You're clearly familiar with it. What else did you expect?

EDIT: Wow I missed an entire page. The thirst was extremely real.

[8BitNinja]

I'm sorry, guys. I had no idea that by stirring this pot, I would awake this pandemonium

My story doesn't even matter anymore. We played yesterday and I don't think anyone would even listen if I told you what happened.

No, I'm sorry, I was the one who was a part of the chaos

[Anonymouswizard]

Sorry, what Chaos? (hides eight pointed star, skull, Viking hat and copy of Fate Core behind his back)

[Hooligan]

Is this anyone else's favorite thread?

"Me and my bros were at the tavern...I crit her in the face...what do?"

I need more of this incredible tale of murder & intrigue.

[Lvl 2 Expert]

I killed my DM's cat-person ones.

[/It's not forum archeology if you just follow someone else, more like forum tourism.]

[Hooligan]

Oh it isn't that old.

Really though Douche, whatever happened to your new characters? Did the Waifu's spirit return to haunt you or was she true resurrected? Have any more annoying peasants forced you & your bros to trash them?

[Max_Killjoy]

Is this the same DM who you're trying to convince to let you play a cat person?

[LibraryOgre]

The Mod Wonder uses Turn Undead!

It's Very Effective!

The post is closed!