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Dementrius
2007-06-21, 06:46 PM
I am currently DMing an evil Zhentil Keep campaign which contains a bard, Ragnard, who is modelled as a cross between Blackadder and Flashman.

In an attempt to show his devoutness to the Banite Cleric of the party (a charisma 4 half-ogre named Vhut), all of his inspire courage songs are venerations to Bane.

However, the current line up is getting somewhat stale for his tastes and he needs some extra verses to spice things up. The following are the current verses:

(To the theme from “Fame!”)
Bane!
He’s gonna rule forever
Great mailed fist in the sky!
Die!

He’s the ultimate badass
People fear him and cry
Bane!

He will destroy the heathens
His enemies burning in flames!
Bane!

He now rules the Zhentarim
Since Cyric was not sane
Bane!

Or (less rarely used)

He sometimes forgets his house keys
Cower in fear from his name
Bane!

Bigger and badder than Iyachtu
Torm won’t get that lucky again
Bane!

All additional verses will be appreciated!

Bassetking
2007-06-21, 06:52 PM
You know that God Bane's one bad Mutha(Shut your mouth!)

I'm only talkin' 'Bout Bane! (We can dig it!)

He's a complicated God... and no one understands him but his Clerics....

Dementrius
2007-06-21, 07:05 PM
You know that God Bane's one bad Mutha(Shut your mouth!)

I'm only talkin' 'Bout Bane! (We can dig it!)

He's a complicated God... and no one understands him but his Clerics....

Who's the cat that won't cop out
When there's goodness all about?
Bane!
Right On!

SoulCatcher78
2007-06-21, 07:13 PM
:smallbiggrin:

Brilliant, I so needed that bit of laughter today. Thank you.

Bassetking
2007-06-21, 07:15 PM
To the Tune of Rob Coulton's "Code Monkey (http://www.jonathancoulton.com/store/downloads)"

Bane Cleric get up, Get Praying...
Bane Cleric go to job.
Bane Cleric Just average Quester...
Dislikes when rogue tries to Rob.

Rogue say Bane Cleric just "Rollplaying"
"He should act, not think"
Bane Cleric wanna smite puny sneaky-man...
From his skull-bones... drink.

Bane Cleric want endless reign of Bane
Want spells, want heals, want buffs, want shoes
Bane Cleric very simple man
With huge, angry, violent god
Bane Cleric want you.

Rama_Lei
2007-06-21, 07:18 PM
I like dark gods and I cannot lie. You other folks can't deny. When Bane walks in with a human head, and a rival cleric dead, you get SMOTE!

Or...

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don't like your diety!
No way, now way
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
Bane could be your diety!

Sonofaspectre
2007-06-21, 07:27 PM
(To the tune of "Flash Gordon" by Queen)

Bane - a-ah - king of the universe
Bane - a-ah - he'll rule everyone of us
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Bane - a-ah - he's a deity
Bane - a-ah - king of the impossible

He's out for everyone of us
Watch out, everyone of us
He'll rule with a mighty hand
Every man every woman
Every child - with a mighty crash

Bane - a-ah
Bane - a-ah - he'll kill everyone of us

Just a god
With a man's kahones
He knows no death, he's gotta plan
But he can never fail
Only one who's pure in heart
Wait ... no ... not even him!
Oh oh - oh oh
Bane

Dementrius
2007-06-21, 07:33 PM
(To the tune of "Flash Gordon" by Queen)

Bane - a-ah - king of the universe
Bane - a-ah - he'll rule everyone of us
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Bane - a-ah - he's a deity
Bane - a-ah - king of the impossible

He's out for everyone of us
Watch out, everyone of us
He'll rule with a mighty hand
Every man every woman
Every child - with a mighty crash

Bane - a-ah
Bane - a-ah - he'll kill everyone of us

Just a god
With a man's kahones
He knows no death, he's gotta plan
But he can never fail
Only one who's pure in heart
Wait ... no ... not even him!
Oh oh - oh oh
Bane

Now THAT'S a catchy tune

Bassetking
2007-06-21, 07:34 PM
(Ripping on Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young.)

Three Mortals and Jergal's Domains.
We're finally on our own.
This summer we're Knucklebowlin'.
Dead Three in Bone Castle.

Dementrius
2007-06-21, 08:08 PM
Come and listen to a story about a man named Bane
A poor adventurer, barely kept off death’s name,
Then one day he was bowling Jergal’s bones,
And from that day he has domains of his own.

Tyranny that is, Hatred and Strife.

Well the first thing you know ol Bane’s a greater god,
Good townsfolk cry “Here comes Bane, oh sod!"
Said "Zhentil Keep’s is the place you ought to be"
So they built him up a temple on the shores of the Moonsea.

Hillsfar, that is. Mulmaster, Voonlar.

Well now its time to say hello to Bane ag’in.
As he burst from the husk of his son Iyachtu Xvim.
He’s been invited back after messin’ with a god of Duty
So you should have a heapin helpin of the quaking at the knees.

Fear that is. Sit down, I’m in charge now.

Y'all do what I say, y'hear?