Anecdotes

[danzibr]

Might be fun to start a thread of funny tidbits. This happened to me the other day.

Me: (Answers phone) Hello?
Guy on other end with middle-eastern accent: My name is so-and-so and I'm calling about such-and-such. How are you doing today?
Me: Swell, and you?
Guy: (Long pause) How are you doing today?
Me: (More clearly) Swell, and you?
Guy: (Long pause) Sir, do you speak English?
Me: That was English.

Conversation proceeds.

[Jon_Dahl]

Hehe, I've had that happened to me in Portuguese...

Me (calls a Mozambican older lady): "Hello, this is Jon from your Service Desk! How are you?" (In Portuguese)
The woman with a quiet voice: "Olá tobei-itu?"
I had this major WTF moment. I asked her to repeat. She was saying "Estou bem. E tu?" with an accent that was wayyyyyyy too exotic for me! The worst thing was that I was trying provide quality service to our client but I couldn't even say "Hello, how are you?" with her. That was very tense...

[Razade]

Might be fun to start a thread of funny tidbits. This happened to me the other day.

Me: (Answers phone) Hello?
Guy on other end with middle-eastern accent: My name is so-and-so and I'm calling about such-and-such. How are you doing today?
Me: Swell, and you?
Guy: (Long pause) How are you doing today?
Me: (More clearly) Swell, and you?
Guy: (Long pause) Sir, do you speak English?
Me: That was English.

Conversation proceeds.

That's not an anecdote...an anecdote is like

So I was walking down by the park the other day, and wouldn't you believe it but I ran into Mrs. Johnson. Everyone knows Mrs. Johnson and her six dogs, and you know I don't really like dogs on account I got bit by Steven Smith's dog and had to get fourty stitches in my butt, but man every time you run into Mrs. Johnson she's got to try and get you to go see her pups. Which is, ya know, the reason I try not to walk on that side of town.So we got to talking and eventually, sure as sunrise, she talked me into going to see her dogs. Walked one foot into her house, nervous as could be, before her biggest came hurtling towards me. Big ol'hairy and black and making noise like a man possessed. I went off running but it just took off after me and wouldn't you know all the other dogs came running too. I wasn't looking where I was going, running from the dogs and all, and ran smack right into Mrs. Johnson. We went tumbling down and then all the dogs came pouring on top a'lickin and a'barkin and Mrs. Johnson, she just sat there and laughed. Guess it goes to show not all them dogs are bad dogs.

An anecdote is supposed to have some lesson in it.

[Jon_Dahl]

That's not an anecdote...an anecdote is like

So I was walking down by the park the other day, and wouldn't you believe it but I ran into Mrs. Johnson. Everyone knows Mrs. Johnson and her six dogs, and you know I don't really like dogs on account I got bit by Steven Smith's dog and had to get fourty stitches in my butt, but man every time you run into Mrs. Johnson she's got to try and get you to go see her pups. Which is, ya know, the reason I try not to walk on that side of town.So we got to talking and eventually, sure as sunrise, she talked me into going to see her dogs. Walked one foot into her house, nervous as could be, before her biggest came hurtling towards me. Big ol'hairy and black and making noise like a man possessed. I went off running but it just took off after me and wouldn't you know all the other dogs came running too. I wasn't looking where I was going, running from the dogs and all, and ran smack right into Mrs. Johnson. We went tumbling down and then all the dogs came pouring on top a'lickin and a'barkin and Mrs. Johnson, she just sat there and laughed. Guess it goes to show not all them dogs are bad dogs.

An anecdote is supposed to have some lesson in it.

Did you sue Mr. Smith?

[Razade]

Did you sue Mr. Smith?

That's a whole other anecdote.

[Vinyadan]

Once upon a time in Austria-Hungary, a writer was eating his lunch in an overcrowded restaurant. A general came in and could not find a place to sit, so he stood beside the writer, thinking that the writer would acknowledge his prestige and authority and give him his place. The writer, however, didn't mind him. So the general, indignant, asked him: "Do you know the difference between man and beast?" To which the writer answered: "Yes: the man sits while he eats, while the beast stands."

[danzibr]

That's not an anecdote...an anecdote is like

[...]

An anecdote is supposed to have some lesson in it.
*checks dictionary*

Nope, sure doesn't.

[Razade]

*checks dictionary*

Nope, sure doesn't.

Yeah? Wikipedia seems to disagree. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anecdote) Here's how it's defined as a Literary Device. (http://literarydevices.net/anecdote/) Seems to support what I said.

[danzibr]

Yeah? Wikipedia seems to disagree. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anecdote) Here's how it's defined as a Literary Device. (http://literarydevices.net/anecdote/) Seems to support what I said.
Yeah indeed. I checked several dictionaries, and all but one made no mention whatsoever of anecdotes having a moral, so to speak. The only one which came close was what you linked, but even then it only said often.

The dictionary said an anecdote is a short humorous tale about a real person. Mine satisfies this definition (though humor is subjective). It indeed has no true point, but that's alright, because even if anecdotes often have a point, often does not mean always.

Though I wonder... I speak American English. Perhaps the nuance is different elsewhere.

[Serpentine]

Nope, Oxford Dictionary online doesn't mention anything like that, and neither does my hardcopy Penguin English Dictionary. If it still matters on Monday I can check the Australian Macquarie Dictionary at work.

I've got one: once upon a time, someone came up with a kind of nice little idea for a thread, and then someone came along and tried to wreck it with (wrong) semantics :T


Uhm... A bunch of milk crates have mysteriously turned up in my garage and I don't know where they came from. Does that count? Nah.

A thought for the thread: maybe give some themes? "Anecdotes" is pretty broad. Maybe a day-to-day, say, "anyone have an anecdote about fishing/with a life lesson/cats/housekeeping?" type thing?

[danzibr]

Nope, Oxford Dictionary online doesn't mention anything like that, and neither does my hardcopy Penguin English Dictionary. If it still matters on Monday I can check the Australian Macquarie Dictionary at work.

I've got one: once upon a time, someone came up with a kind of nice little idea for a thread, and then someone came along and tried to wreck it with (wrong) semantics :T


Uhm... A bunch of milk crates have mysteriously turned up in my garage and I don't know where they came from. Does that count? Nah.

A thought for the thread: maybe give some themes? "Anecdotes" is pretty broad. Maybe a day-to-day, say, "anyone have an anecdote about fishing/with a life lesson/cats/housekeeping?" type thing?
I like this :P

Me, I'm thinking to post here anything which I'm directly involved in and I find quite comical. I guess... contemporary anecdotes.

[Jon_Dahl]

Let's not be anal. There's an example in the OP. Let's just post stories that are somewhat similar in structure. It doesn't matter if we call them kaskdjajksdnkasmnd.

[Vinyadan]

Let's not be anal. There's an example in the OP. Let's just post stories that are somewhat similar in structure. It doesn't matter if we call them kaskdjajksdnkasmnd.

Once upon a time there was a boy who didn't know that anal is also used as an abbreviation for analytical, and thought that it meant "don't be an a**", not of the equine variety.

I find it interesting that you need to discuss what anecdotes are. I read a lot of collections of anecdotes when I was a kid, there were these pages coming out once a week, each with some 5-6 of them (the above wasn't an anecdote).

[YossarianLives]

On the bus the other day, I overheard a large group of teenagers talking about their friend who had been expelled from school for chewing tobacco in class after numerous warnings. Their conversation bounced back and forth between this and an anecdote (heh) about how one of them had almost been arrested by the transit police for about 20 minutes.

[Brother Oni]

An anecdote from a RLC lieutenant I met once:

The Bosnian War had broken out and the aforementioned lieutenant wanted to head out there to do some soldiering. He prevailed upon his commanding officer and less than 6 months out of Sandhurst, he was out there, running a small supply depot. Things were going fairly well until some bright spark in the RA realised that most of the British forward bases were within range of enemy artillery, starting a mass withdrawal.

The lieutenant had to give a briefing to all his men explaining, "yes, they were within range of enemy artillery but it was fairly inaccurate and the risk to them was minimal", while all his senior NCOs at the back of the room were shaking their heads in disagreement (he overheard a telephone conversation of a NCO telling their family that he didn't think he was going to make it home this time).
At one point, their supply depot was the second most forward base, which didn't do great things for the LT's nerves.

Finally they received their orders and part way through preparing everything to leave, a message from HQ came through while he was sorting things out on the other side of the camp. Obviously this spread like wildfire throughout their camp and the LT suddenly found his senior NCO bellowing at him "MESSAGE FROM HQ SIR!" from the door of the warehouse. Doing his best unconcerned officer's walk (more like a quick jog), he got to the radio room... only to find the message was basically "Don't forget to turn the lights off before you go".

[Aldarin]

Okay, I was reading a textbook while my sister was on the phone.
Here's what I heard.

Sister: Yeah, I just signed up.
(Pause)
Sister: Yeah, love the service. In fact, I just got back from weight training.
(Long pause)
Sister: Yep, still losing weight.
(Very long pause)
Sister: Yeah, it's like I was saying to James. Soon I'll be able to crush cities with my buttcheeks.

This would be a lot less worrying (my sister is pretty weird) if I knew who James was.

[Red Fel]

Yeah? Wikipedia seems to disagree. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anecdote) Here's how it's defined as a Literary Device. (http://literarydevices.net/anecdote/) Seems to support what I said.

I think you made an important distinction. As a literary device. Anything, when used as a literary device, is intended to have a function. That's kind of what makes it a literary device.

When I tell my friend something funny that happened to me the other day, it's an anecdote. If I were a character in a novel, that same anecdote would suddenly serve a function, because literary device; in real life, like anything else I say, it's a profoundly useless waste of everybody's time.

Honestly, I'm just watching this thread and waiting for one of these anecdotes Bel-Air.

[danzibr]

Okay, I was reading a textbook while my sister was on the phone.
Here's what I heard.

Sister: Yeah, I just signed up.
(Pause)
Sister: Yeah, love the service. In fact, I just got back from weight training.
(Long pause)
Sister: Yep, still losing weight.
(Very long pause)
Sister: Yeah, it's like I was saying to James. Soon I'll be able to crush cities with my buttcheeks.

This would be a lot less worrying (my sister is pretty weird) if I knew who James was.
Haha, nice.

I think you made an important distinction. As a literary device. Anything, when used as a literary device, is intended to have a function. That's kind of what makes it a literary device.

When I tell my friend something funny that happened to me the other day, it's an anecdote. If I were a character in a novel, that same anecdote would suddenly serve a function, because literary device; in real life, like anything else I say, it's a profoundly useless waste of everybody's time.

Honestly, I'm just watching this thread and waiting for one of these anecdotes Bel-Air.
Well put, Red Fel.

[Vinyadan]

When people protested his new tax on public latrines in an age when home latrines in urban environment didn't exist, emperor Vespasian showed a coin and said "It doesn't stink".

About 20 years later, Rome had private latrines in homes connected to the sewer system.

(To be more precise, the tax was on the resell of urine by private owners of public latrines, which was used for tannery).

[plazeebo]

So, every so often at work I'd bump into the same coworker getting coffee. We'd chat, make small talk, water-cooler stuff. I'd seen her around, here and there so I didn't want to ask her name because that would be mildly awkward. I'd see her and nod, smile, saygood morning and never knew her name. Weird thing was she wasn't in the company facebook. Not a big mystery. They only remember to update when they remember. So it's a year gone and I still don't know who this person is though I know plenty about their life. Three kids, one in college. A dog, a husband in sales...
Then I don't see her. A week goes by. Two weeks. Problem is I can't even ask if they're okay because I don't know their name!
A month goes by and I finally breakdown and start asking about this woman. No one has a clue who I am talking about. No one recognized my description. No one has even seen me talking to this person.

Starting to wonder if I was having coffee with a ghost or blew a fuse in my brain.