Smoke on the Water

[Afgncaap5]

So... due to completely natural character development of a joke at early levels, my 6th level warlock must destroy four enemy ships that attacked our town (or at least two of them). If I don't do it, then I'm pretty sure the GM's gonna frame my character for doing it given his anti-ship reputation in the town, and I'll die before some plot-borne spy gets to have the fun first.

Now, I've already got some basic ways to burn boats down, a couple of spells and cantrips and magic items and good old fashioned jars of oil all work together effectively, but I'm curious to know if anyone knows of any awesome, or surprisingly practical, or just plain imaginative, methods of burning down boats.

So... won't you help me help my character help these ships into their post-arson states?

And for the record, I'm open to just about anything, whether rules quirks or fun roleplaying arcs. If it gets a boat burnt, it's good to go.

[TheNecrocomicon]

Did they attack the town with cannon fire? If so, any ship that did definitely has a powder magazine somewhere that you can penetrate and ignite, if you can find it or know naval architecture well enough. Maybe you can slip aboard the ship somehow, set a fuse of sufficient length, then escape back to shore and revel in the fireworks.

Does maybe True Strike have enough range in conjunction with a thrown incendiary item or two to hit one or more ships from shore? Or maybe is there some way to levitate or teleport the item aboard?

Can your character swim near the ships, punch enough holes in their hulls to sink them gradually, then return to shore? Maybe set up a small rowboat/dinghy propelled towards the ship(s) with illusions of crew members aboard hiding a cargo of explosive items, which will then detonate when taken close to the ship(s) or on deck? Maybe sell them barrels or crates that appear to be full of cargo, but are actually hiding time bombs?

I wonder if you could summon a sufficiently strong whirlpool to suck the ships down, or do something that teleports them onto shore high and dry or into a space occupied by another of their flotilla, or maybe summon a large quantity of rock aboard one or more of them to overwhelm their buoyancy to sink or capsize them, or do it underneath the ships and let them pull a Costa Concordia while still at anchor in the harbour. Or freeze a large enough volume of water around them to crush their hulls, and then dispel the effect and let them sink. Or do something that lures a sea monster of some kind to the ships in question. Or toss an item with a Symbol of Insanity on it aboard one or more ships, and then watch while the crew does your destructive work for you.

The possibilities are myriad. :smallbiggrin:

[Afgncaap5]

Did they attack the town with cannon fire? If so, any ship that did definitely has a powder magazine somewhere that you can penetrate and ignite, if you can find it or know naval architecture well enough. Maybe you can slip aboard the ship somehow, set a fuse of sufficient length, then escape back to shore and revel in the fireworks.

I think some of the ships do, though so far most of the ships' weaponry has come in the form of giant ballista bolts.


Does maybe True Strike have enough range in conjunction with a thrown incendiary item or two to hit one or more ships from shore? Or maybe is there some way to levitate or teleport the item aboard?

This is effectively what I'm doing now. I'm using Fly to go to boats, putting a hypnotic image into the air to freeze the crew where they stand, and then using a bag of undead fireflies that I can throw as a bonus action to start little fires which I help to spread with oil.



Can your character swim near the ships, punch enough holes in their hulls to sink them gradually, then return to shore? Maybe set up a small rowboat/dinghy propelled towards the ship(s) with illusions of crew members aboard hiding a cargo of explosive items, which will then detonate when taken close to the ship(s) or on deck? Maybe sell them barrels or crates that appear to be full of cargo, but are actually hiding time bombs?

I wonder if you could summon a sufficiently strong whirlpool to suck the ships down, or do something that teleports them onto shore high and dry or into a space occupied by another of their flotilla, or maybe summon a large quantity of rock aboard one or more of them to overwhelm their buoyancy to sink or capsize them, or do it underneath the ships and let them pull a Costa Concordia while still at anchor in the harbour. Or freeze a large enough volume of water around them to crush their hulls, and then dispel the effect and let them sink. Or do something that lures a sea monster of some kind to the ships in question. Or toss an item with a Symbol of Insanity on it aboard one or more ships, and then watch while the crew does your destructive work for you.

The possibilities are myriad. :smallbiggrin:

Indeed, they are. And truly, any form of boat destruction is fun, though simply sinking a ship won't do for this character. It specifically has to be fire.

I've had some seriously weird character development this game.

My warlock legitimately shed a tear when he found a forest of trees that have fire instead of leaves and realized that he could make a boat that would be always on fire while still being a functional boat. He keeps it anchored near the cave he lives in just outside town, and uses Druidcraft to reignite the flame whenever he wants to travel majestically.

[Mjolnirbear]

Mephits and imps, maybe?

Gunpowder ignites with concussion force too, so... Fly the Meat Shield above the boat carrying two barrels of Gunpowder, and have him drop them.

Or Locate the casks and swim close. Then use something like thunderclap or thunder wave with a knock back effect. (edit: um, Darwin says being close to exploding Gunpowder casks is not SMRT. Kept here for comedic value)

Make a sentry suffer extreme cold with Phantasmal Force, as though suddenly transported to the Arctic. Have part of the illusion disguise something really flammable (say, disguise a rope coil as a bonfire ready for the flame) so he can get warm.

Have him inform the cleric that the ships are crawling with undead. Support with illusions or possibly Suggestion. Flamestrike is still a spell, right?

[PoeticDwarf]

Cool stealth mission ?

[RumoCrytuf]

Mephits and imps, maybe?

Flavorwise, since your character is a warlock, demons and fiery fiends of flame are the best option.

[EvilAnagram]

Obviously Create Bonfire, as a fire cantrip, is going to be your best friend here. Target the sail, watch it erupt in flame.

Assuming you have two spell slots, Shatter, Burning Hands, and Fireball are all obvious candidates for taking out ships. With Shatter, target the rudder or the hull under the waterline. Eldritch Blasting the rudders is honestly a perfectly good option.

Remember that well-placed oil and a single Scorching Ray at third level could wipe them all out, but you're risking their putting them out.

[Oramac]

OK, so my first thought when I opened this thread was of Deep Purple (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUwEIt9ez7M).


Anyway, fire is a simple thing. It requires fuel, oxygen, and spark. Lots of ways to do that.

Can you get your hands on some fertilizer-ish stuff and grind up some aluminum maybe? If so, you have the makings of D&D Tannerite (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tannerite). Hit it with an Eldritch Blast from across the bay and boom. Get enough of it in place and a few ships close enough together, and you might even take out more than one at a time.

[TheNecrocomicon]

I forgot about the "specifically has to be fire" requirement.

Can you maybe sneak close and slather an incendiary material over their hulls, then ignite it with a fire spell of your choice from back on shore (or do a drive-by in that naturally flaming boat you mentioned) and maybe target the sails/rigging next for good measure? I wonder if some form of thermite is another possibility.

Also since your highest stat as a warlock is presumably Charisma, I maintain it could go really well to sell the crew fake or illusory cargo that hides incendiary traps that you could then remotely activate or set to trigger somehow after they are taken aboard. Bonus points if the ships are carrying alcohol or other handy fuel in their cargo holds. (Or, corollary to that, sell them a bunch of actual alcohol which is set to explode as soon as they try and take some for themselves.)

[Demonslayer666]

Alchemist's Fire. Lots of it.

[JackPhoenix]

Or Locate the casks and swim close. Then use something like thunderclap or thunder wave with a knock back effect. (edit: um, Darwin says being close to exploding Gunpowder casks is not SMRT. Kept here for comedic value)

I know it's a typo, but... smrt means death in czech, an I'm pretty sure being close to an exploding cask of gunpowder is pretty deadly.


Can you get your hands on some fertilizer-ish stuff and grind up some aluminum maybe? If so, you have the makings of D&D Tannerite (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tannerite). Hit it with an Eldritch Blast from across the bay and boom. Get enough of it in place and a few ships close enough together, and you might even take out more than one at a time.

D&D is not our modern world, I think the only fertilizer are various flavours of manure, and aluminium wasn't discovered yet, if it even exists.

[Nicodiemus]

If you have access to summon elemental you could just summon fire mephets and let them dance around the ships wreaking havoc.

[Roughishguy86]

build a siege weapon and launch flaming sheep through the air onto the ships.

[Roughishguy86]

Step 1) Go on a quest too find Krod Mandoon and his flaming sword of fire.
Step 2) Steal said flaming sword of fire.
Step 3) profit???

[EvilAnagram]

Step One: Set cow on fire

Step Two: Teleport cow to ship

Step Three: ?

Step Four: Profit!

[CrackedChair]

Step One: Set cow on fire

Step Two: Teleport cow to ship

Step Three: ?

Step Four: Profit!

Fairly certain the Balor or whatnot that warlock made a pact with would say the same thing too.

[MBControl]

Could you build, or magically create an Archimedes lens? A mythical (maybe real) large mirror, or collection of mirrors to target sunlight onto the boats that light to ships on fire, like burning ants with a magnifying glass.

[Knaight]

Are the boats currently in firing range, or incoming, or what? Are they all together, or spread out? Basically, what's the broader situation?

There are a lot of options that only really work for particular scenarios, and they are often the more fun ones.

[Corran]

So... due to completely natural character development of a joke at early levels, my 6th level warlock must destroy four enemy ships that attacked our town (or at least two of them). If I don't do it, then I'm pretty sure the GM's gonna frame my character for doing it given his anti-ship reputation in the town, and I'll die before some plot-borne spy gets to have the fun first.

Now, I've already got some basic ways to burn boats down, a couple of spells and cantrips and magic items and good old fashioned jars of oil all work together effectively, but I'm curious to know if anyone knows of any awesome, or surprisingly practical, or just plain imaginative, methods of burning down boats.

So... won't you help me help my character help these ships into their post-arson states?

And for the record, I'm open to just about anything, whether rules quirks or fun roleplaying arcs. If it gets a boat burnt, it's good to go.
The best way to do it, would probably be......... this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuNyWMAWptE

[EvilAnagram]

Step 1: Cast Major Image to make the ship look like a female phoenix.
Step 2: Use Minor Illusion to mimic the mating cry of a female phoenix.
Step 3: [censored]
Step 4: Success!

[SharkForce]

Step 1: Cast Major Image to make the ship look like a female phoenix.
Step 2: Use Minor Illusion to mimic the mating cry of a female phoenix.
Step 3: [censored]
Step 4: Success!

if you can pull this off, that would be amazing 0.o

[CrackedChair]

Step 1: Cast Major Image to make the ship look like a female phoenix.
Step 2: Use Minor Illusion to mimic the mating cry of a female phoenix.
Step 3: [censored]
Step 4: Success!

I'm loving Evilanagram's Ideas. All of them.

Erm, I guess it is an illusion, so it may scare off the invaders... but the problem is, Phoenix's are not really that seen in most d&d campaigns. As legendary a beast it is, it's not in any Monster manual as far as I know, so if your world does not feature them, it; depending on the DM, might really turn some heads and some boats the other way, or it might bewilder them...

[EvilAnagram]

I'm loving Evilanagram's Ideas. All of them.

Erm, I guess it is an illusion, so it may scare off the invaders... but the problem is, Phoenix's are not really that seen in most d&d campaigns. As legendary a beast it is, it's not in any Monster manual as far as I know, so if your world does not feature them, it; depending on the DM, might really turn some heads and some boats the other way, or it might bewilder them...
It's in the 4e MM. For 5e, I'd say give a Rock some fire abilities and you have a phoenix.

The point is to summon a male phoenix with the illusion of the female. The randy male then ****s the ship to death. With fire.

[Rhaegar14]

A lot of good ideas have been put out there, but for the OP, I think we need to know what your Warlock's Patron is (and probably spells known, for that matter). I see a lot of suggestions involving fire spells, and I'm pretty sure non-Archfiend Warlocks don't even get access to any fire spells.

[EvilAnagram]

A lot of good ideas have been put out there, but for the OP, I think we need to know what your Warlock's Patron is (and probably spells known, for that matter). I see a lot of suggestions involving fire spells, and I'm pretty sure non-Archfiend Warlocks don't even get access to any fire spells.

They get Create Bonfire.