PDA

View Full Version : Player Help Idea's for my Dark heresy Character



Cilvyn
2016-05-24, 01:57 PM
Hello dear reader,

One of the things I love maybe even more than playing is building characters for thr game.

A while ago I made this character for a game of Dark Heresy (40K setting). She is a Sister Hospitaller, for those a little less familiar with the entire lore, a sister of battle, but the order of surgeons, doctors and sometimes even used by the inquisition to assist with torture because of their knowledge of anatomy.

I already worked up a pretty big background and personality but I would like to extend this further, work out more details and add more to it.

My question is if you have some ideas I can use to make this character better, enhance her personality to bring her to life even more. Even if you don't know much avbout the 40K lore you can help if you like, since personality is something we all know at least something about.

My thanks in advance for your helpfull imput.

My questions or points that I would like feedback/idead on:
- Sisters of battle are amazing women, often beautiful, perfect in appearance, etiquettes, well trained and so on. I don't like playing 'perfect' characters so I am looking for ways to make her flawed, not to the point that she is socially awkward, because I like characters who are charismatic and intelligent rather than combat machines. I havent posted her skillset with it, but she is pretty much useless in combat except for being indestructible so she can be at the front line giving medical attention to those who need it.
- I'd like some unresolved issues in her history to work with.
- For the more knowledgable 40K players, I am not a veteran player, so I might have some errors in the lore which I would love to be corrected.


The Character Background


Sister Lucrezia "Lucia" Defiore


http://i.imgur.com/XMwkSKY.png

"Heretics... I HATE heretics..."



Name
Lucrezia Iona Nathalia Defiore


Homeworld
ShrineWorld


Career
Sister Hospitaller


Rank
1




Divination
"The only fear is dying with your duty not done"



Appearance



http://i.imgur.com/msiFI5R.jpgg



Gender
Female


Age
23


Skin
Light


Eyes
Bright Green


Hair
Short red/brown


Hight
1.70m


Weight
60kg


Built
Slim



Lucia is a beautiful girl with short reddish brown hair that comes to her shoulder. Her eyes are bright green and are deep, you could look in them for hours not knowing what goes on deep inside her. Her face is light and smooth except for a 'Fleur de Lille' tattoo under her left eye. She is average lenght although in her armour she is a little taller. her armour is red white and gray, the colours of the Sister Hispitallers. Wherever she comes people are amazed by her beauty and are full of respect for her and her order both adoring her and fearing her wrath for those who deserve it.


Background

Persons and places of Note

Mister B
Mister B is a servitor designed to teach, read stories and be a company to children. He is mostly machine and actually a very gentle being that follows orders and has bedtime stories, educative puzzles, language lessons and much, much more interesting tools. Mister B is the companion of Lucia during her childhood

http://www.gamer.ru/system/attached_images/images/000/199/320/normal/1274286686_x_d58cef46.jpg

’Lord and Lady’ Defiore
These extremely snobbish people think of themselves as nobles, but they are not. Misses Defiore spends most of her time in her time on masked balls, social meetings with high placed officials and if Lucia was a little older to understand what her mother did there she would be disgusted by her way of life. Her father is not better. He loves to put on quite the show so everyone will think he is of noble birth. He is extremely paranoia and even spends time in the archives to look for any clue he might be a noble relative.

Prof. Jane Claire
Jane is the teacher of Lucia and adores her. She likes how she is devoted to her work and she does what she can to keep her safe from bullies in school. Her high status at the ecclessiarchy makes that hse has quite some influence in the affairs of the charge and thus even on political areas. Her family has close ties with several institutes like several scholas and the Adepta Sororitas.

5th Company Captain Darius Dregon
Darius is a goodwilling captain of his company. When he fought the heresy uprising on the shrine world where Lucia lives. During the battle he is mostly found in the front lines with his men. He sees Lucia as a guardian angel and somehow looks up to her. He is touched by her dedication to his men and has strong feelings for her although he never expressed them

Shrine world Mak’ar
Mak’ar is an old shrine world dedicated to a very old saint. His temples and statues are mostly turned to flat rocks due to erosion. The planet itself has a warm climate and it’s inhabitants are ruled by some of the lower ecclessiarchy who are not in close contact with their superiors and most of the time do what they can to enrich themselves. No one actually gives a damn about the planet because its glory days are over.

Background Story


Early Life
Early Life
The twins Lucrezia and Elizabeth were born on the old shrine world Mak’ar. Her parents were very happy with the two girls, although over the years they became more and more obsessed with their lives as ‘nobles’. When the twins were 2 years old, their parents came home, drugged and drunk, and accidentally killed Elizabeth as they ran over her with their car. From that point Lucrezia's father and mother seemed to not care about her, although she was too young to understand that they felt too guilty to actually care for her. Her parents mostly leave her to the care of maids and the servitor named Mister B. Lucia was a very bright and playful child and she loved to play in her mansion's garden; Mister B was always at her side and altough he was more machine than anything else Lucia felt very he was very close, somehow replacing her lost sister. One day Lucia accidentally triggered something in the servitor to make him tell old stories about the Emperor and His great deeds: from that point He started to play a huge role in her life, and she let mister B repeatedly tell her stories about this godlike figure.
For her the Emperor was a friend far away across the stars on a place called Holy Terra, and despite the distance he was always with her in her heart and understood her anger and sorrow. As a little girl she made an altar dedicated to him, picking flowers and keeping on it her most beloved items and her doll, the only real thing of her sister's she had left. She prayed every day to the Emperor and her sister who had to be sitting at His side in that heavenly place called Holy Terra.

When she grew older her parents sent her to school to prepare her for the life as a noble, which they desperately tried to be. Knowing she had to do her best, because the Emperor was watching her and she wanted to be the best she could for her sister's sake, she became the top of her class. Being fluent in High and Low Gothic and scoring the best results she catched the eye of her teachers very quickly: it was clear that girl was destined for greater things. In class however she got bullied by the other kids, who thought she was a weird girl with her imaginary friend, her constant praying to the Emperor and her complete devotion to her grades. Her professor Jane protected the young girl as much as she could and helped her with more advanced teachings.
One night Jane came to her and told Lucia to come with her: there are bad news, her father had murderer her mother. The exact details always remained unknown to her, but it appeared to be some sort of ritual. (In fact he got tainted by chaos a while back due to his lavish lifestyle and tried to make a dark pact to finally become what he always wanted to be: a real noble.)

As the investigation started Jane took Lucia underground, knowing what would have happened if they discovered that the two heretics had a daughter. Lucia, who was 12 years old at the time, started living with her teacher, studying at home for the following 4 years.
Meanwhile outside in the world things change radically: the lower Ecclesiarchy overthrew their superiors on the planet, laid hold on their treasury and started to terrorize the population in the name of Mak’ar. Things got out of hand when they even started to worship the saint as a god and perform dark magics to ensure their power over the struggling citizens. This was a rather slow progress however and by the time Lucia was 16 there was no real threat yet.

Adeptus Sororitas
At the age of 13 her teacher and guardian Jane thought it was time to find a new future for the young Lucia: with her parents gone, she had nowhere to go to and Jane used her connections to get her into the Saint Celestine's Monastery where the girl began her training. She learned really fast, the only thing she was not good at being combat: she underwent extensive training and education in the traditions of the Adepta Sororitas. She blinkt uit in biology and medical classes and to her abbess it was clear what path Lucia would have followed after her initiation.

After a few years, just before she would be judged worthy to become a full member of the Sisterhood, things got out of hand on the planet. Chaos lurked for many years under the surface, mostly unnoticed by the common folk, and the worshipping of Mak’ar had reached extreme levels with the Ecclesiarchy openly revolting against their superiors in the sector, openly demanding a separate cult and no interference from the Imperium. Alistair could not let that be and did what he is known for; solving situations like that quickly and effectively. He sent his regiments to Mak’ar and a bloody civil war started.

The whole planet was subject to the war, everyone was on one side or another and fulfilling a role. There was no real front besides the exceptional confrontation between the Imperial Guard and the cultists, as most of the time it was guerilla war. Bombings, executions and minor conflicts occurred on daily basis. The Sisterhood too is drawn into the conflict, for they could not stand at the sideline in that world war, and at the age of 18 Lucia was assigned to the 5th company to serve as medical support.

War and Inquisition
In the 5th company she quickly became beloved by the men. During the day she tended to the wounded, giving a listening ear to the men who needed someone to talk to. In the evenings she sang for them, courageous songs about battle and victory. At night she watched over the wounded and dying. She became the 'Patron' of the company, and even the captain adored her and trusted her with his issues. You could often find her at the front lines when actual battles took place, as she knew she inspired the men and that her presence boosted their morale.


“Today an angel appeared to me. She had short red hair and wore the armour of a soldier. Her voice was bright and gave me courage. I heard she is the protector of the 5th and trusted companion of the captain. Just having her by my side took away my fear,, because I knew if I would die, I would die in the name of Emperor and his angel.”
- Jeremy Stronghold 3rd plt 4th cmp. Bl. W. Reg.

However she was not only a mascotte: she remained a sister still and the men knew heresy or cowardice would have not been tolerated. Lucia saw many of the guys she cared for die at the hands of heretics and she developed a deep hatred towards them, even more than her Adepta Sorotitas code dictates; over the years she matured enormously, remaining the angel-like beauty who strengthened the hearts of men, but also unforgiving towards those who abandoned the light of the Emperor. she spent most of the time in her medical tent: that was her territory and even the captain who frequently visited her took orders from her when wounded men came in by the dozens.
Once the war is over and the heretics are beaten, Lucia finally becomes a full fledged member of the Adepta Sororitas as a Sister Hospitaller for her outstanding work in the field. Not only were the guardsmen and the Adepta impressed by her undying spirit and devotion the the Imperium, but also some agents of the Inquisition came into contact with her. Lucia of course had no idea who they were, but once they showed her the holy symbol and asked her for her service, she didn't hesitate to bring the light of the Emperor where she was needed.

Geddy2112
2016-05-24, 02:32 PM
Looks like a solid start. I never played sisters but I played 40k a lot in my younger years.



My questions or points that I would like feedback/idead on:
- Sisters of battle are amazing women, often beautiful, perfect in appearance, etiquettes, well trained and so on. I don't like playing 'perfect' characters so I am looking for ways to make her flawed, not to the point that she is socially awkward, because I like characters who are charismatic and intelligent rather than combat machines.To my knowledge this is not true. Actually, it is the opposite, as sisters are chosen entirely for their faith and zealous love of the emperor. Many are going to be rugged, weather worn, salt of the earth types, particularly if they were recruited from a tough world. Their charisma comes from their conviction, not their looks.


I havent posted her skillset with it, but she is pretty much useless in combat except for being indestructible so she can be at the front line giving medical attention to those who need it.
Hospitiliers would still have basic combat training and not be notably worse than any regular sister of battle with a bolter. Certainly less skilled at shooting than a retributor, less skilled in melee than searaphim, and less elite than a celestian, but you don't graduate the school if you can't shoot. Also, hospitiliers sometimes wear carapace armor instead of power armor depending on their particular assignment.

Otherwise it looks pretty good. Sisters are almost always orphans, and your backstory has plenty of UNQUESTIONABLE DEVOTION TO THE EMPEROR.

The Glyphstone
2016-05-24, 02:53 PM
I'd be surprised to find a Sororitas well-trained or practiced in etiquette at all, really. They're fanatics raised and trained in a bubble environment, their ability to interact with or understand the motivations of 'regular people' is generally rather stunted unless the topic is faith/spirituality. A Hospitalier I could very well see being the 40K equivalent of a hardcore medical geek, a doctor who drops into med-jargon at the drop of a hat and has terrible 'bedside manner' beyond offering faith-based assurances and platitudes.

Anonymouswizard
2016-05-24, 03:00 PM
Out of interest, is this 1e or 2e? It actually changes any mechanical advice a fair bit (due to the abandoning of Careers for Aptitudes).


- Sisters of battle are amazing women, often beautiful, perfect in appearance, etiquettes, well trained and so on. I don't like playing 'perfect' characters so I am looking for ways to make her flawed, not to the point that she is socially awkward, because I like characters who are charismatic and intelligent rather than combat machines. I havent posted her skillset with it, but she is pretty much useless in combat except for being indestructible so she can be at the front line giving medical attention to those who need it.

Think of it this way: you're a nun. You aren't going to be perfect in appearance, and probably aren't that beautiful (think pretty rather than gorgeous). You probably also don't follow the mold ideally, maybe you're charismatic but don't have great etiquette (ideally the cell would already have a face in this case), or you're more about the Lore than the Battle.


- I'd like some unresolved issues in her history to work with.

Oh, don't worry about that, you'll burn down enough stuff in play that there'll be issues aplenty :smalltongue:


- For the more knowledgable 40K players, I am not a veteran player, so I might have some errors in the lore which I would love to be corrected.

I'm no veteran lore-wisr, wizard our!

Cilvyn
2016-05-24, 04:07 PM
@Anonymouswizard:
Alright, I can see the beautiful part and I think I was more playing on the aweinspiring part of people who would look at here (Who mostly will be simple guardsmen), but I think I can do something with that, I will work more on the appearence details and transform it a bit more into what you describe here. I love playing 'not beautiful women, probably mosrtly because if guys play women they let them be some hot commercial hottie all the time... I don't like that, ah well.

@The Glyphstone
Mh the etiquettes is something she personally would deem important, from her bloodline and all, I doubt it would be something that a sororita training would erese completely, but she could be a little more clunky maybe.. I don't really know how this would look like though. Maybe I let some famulus characteristics slip in here which shouldn't :P I like the bedside manners, maybe she wouldn't be really socially awkward, jsut more geeky in the way you describe it, which can be adorable in some way I think, unless you're laying there half dead ofcourse, which will be most situation, sounds like pretty fun situations. Am I maybe see her too lady-like?

Geddy2112
Thanx for the words of confidence, yeah I made sure she is pretty devoted in her own way, which might not exactly be the way standard liturgy would demand it, at least in her younger years. During her training she would certainly be corrected on these matters and thaught the correct way of the sororitas devotion to the emprah.

About her appearance. In contrast to the artwork in the 40K books I absolutely don't like all the implants, terrible looking skin, the skulls are alright, but you get my drift. I think I indeed will her less 'undamaged'.

Thank you soo muhc for your imput, This helps me alot!

Geddy2112
2016-05-24, 05:06 PM
I think you underestimate the grimdark nature of the grimdark future where there is only war. Beautiful things are murdered and extinguished, or worse corrupted into their sickening excess. The only things in the universe that are halfway beautiful are eldar, and well, their "beauty" made Slanessh and now they are teetering on extinction. As a hospititalier, your job would involve implants, cybernetics, chop shop style surgery. It will be only a matter of time before you earn your scrapes, nicks, what have you. The nuns with guns are just as edgy and gritty as the rest of the imperium, possibly moreso because of their Fervor. Physical beauty is for the Eldar, which are fithly xenos that must be purged with fire in the name of the emperor.

The Glyphstone
2016-05-24, 05:35 PM
I think you underestimate the grimdark nature of the grimdark future where there is only war. Beautiful things are murdered and extinguished, or worse corrupted into their sickening excess. The only things in the universe that are halfway beautiful are eldar, and well, their "beauty" made Slanessh and now they are teetering on extinction. As a hospititalier, your job would involve implants, cybernetics, chop shop style surgery. It will be only a matter of time before you earn your scrapes, nicks, what have you. The nuns with guns are just as edgy and gritty as the rest of the imperium, possibly moreso because of their Fervor. Physical beauty is for the Eldar, which are fithly xenos that must be purged with fire in the name of the emperor.

On the other hand, if she's a relatively fresh novice, it's fair to say she hasn't picked up any serious scrapes/nicks/etc. Real scars get earned on-screen as part of that slow extinguishing.

Geddy2112
2016-05-24, 11:35 PM
On the other hand, if she's a relatively fresh novice, it's fair to say she hasn't picked up any serious scrapes/nicks/etc. Real scars get earned on-screen as part of that slow extinguishing.

Oh I totally agree and the juxtaposition of the young and innocent beauty against the backdrop of 40k grimdark is amazing. I did not mean to come off as harsh and saying the character should be battle worn off the bat, but that is the natural progression of the setting. The cool thing about the Sisters is that their faith in the emperor and their unyielding devotion is beautiful, regardless of how many body parts a Sister superior has had replaced.

Cilvyn
2016-05-25, 04:05 AM
Don't worry, I know you meant well and I knew what i was getting myself into when posting this background, haha, so please just lay your ideas on me and I will try to absorb it all like a spongue!

I think I indeed went for that idea, just a spark of light in this dark grim universe, although I know this is some way goes against the norm.

About me underestimating the nature of 40K, I totally agree here. I am a lnog time D&D player and although I always did my besat to make these campaigns as 'reaistic' as possible, it still is ponies and rainbows compaired to 40K and I am still learning, so me posting this is also a very soft cry for help.

If people have more aspects to discuss I am all ears I will post a reviced background soon!

Geddy2112
2016-05-25, 09:06 AM
The Sisters, Tau, sometimes the Eldar and rarely the imperium of man are sometimes lights in the darkness in the otherwise grimdark setting. I mean, somebody kinda has to be the hero...Well, technically the Emperor's presence in the warp feeds the Astronomican, a giant light which allows humanity to use the warp to travel. Sure it requires the souls of 10,000 psychic adept humans a day to keep it running but it is the light in the dark, and part of why chaos has not just flooded realspace.

Chaos is going to be your primary enemy, so you would be treating wounds from their weapons more than others. Heretics and cultists are going to have stolen Imperial Guard munitions and improvised melee weapons. So las wounds, frag shrapnel, chainsword cuts, misc. melee hacks and slashes.

If you end up against some of the nastier Chaos, like a deity dedicated, it can vary. Khornates love close combat and favor axes. Nurgle loves plague and disease, almost all of his followers melee weapons are poisoned/covered in bacteria and filth. Tzeenetch loves magic and entropy, so expect warp blasts, lightning, and magic bolter rounds. Slannesh followers often have strange lovecraftian appendages like tentacles, decopod claws, etc. IN addition to injuries from these, I would not rule out spreading such mutations.

For other combat injuries: Eldar probably won't come up in your setting, but their primary weapons are monofilament guns. Dark eldar use poisoned needleguns, but also pretty uncommon enemies by the numbers. Orks are good old fashioned bullets and blades. Necrons use gauss, which is like a particle beam and leaves severe burns if it does not kill outright. Tau use modified and safer versions of the imperial plasma weaponry. Tyranids don't leave survivors.

Also, your character would have been considered a godsend among the imperial guard. Even a low sister hospitalier is going to be better than a veteran doctor in the IG. The IG are more or less considered disposable by the rest of the imperium, so not only are they receiving aid from a superior soldier, but if you actually gave a damn about them double brownie points. The Space Marines don't give two cares about their IG comrades, just seeing them as pawns and having no qualms exterminating entire armies if they saw something they were not supposed to see (Inquisition, Grey Knights...). Likewise, your IG counterpart is the apothecary, who spends most of their time sucking the gene seed out of fallen marines and making the mortally wounded into dreadnaughts.

Cilvyn
2016-05-25, 09:19 AM
The Sisters, Tau, sometimes the Eldar and rarely the imperium of man are sometimes lights in the darkness in the otherwise grimdark setting. I mean, somebody kinda has to be the hero...Well, technically the Emperor's presence in the warp feeds the Astronomican, a giant light which allows humanity to use the warp to travel. Sure it requires the souls of 10,000 psychic adept humans a day to keep it running but it is the light in the dark, and part of why chaos has not just flooded realspace.

Chaos is going to be your primary enemy, so you would be treating wounds from their weapons more than others. Heretics and cultists are going to have stolen Imperial Guard munitions and improvised melee weapons. So las wounds, frag shrapnel, chainsword cuts, misc. melee hacks and slashes.

If you end up against some of the nastier Chaos, like a deity dedicated, it can vary. Khornates love close combat and favor axes. Nurgle loves plague and disease, almost all of his followers melee weapons are poisoned/covered in bacteria and filth. Tzeenetch loves magic and entropy, so expect warp blasts, lightning, and magic bolter rounds. Slannesh followers often have strange lovecraftian appendages like tentacles, decopod claws, etc. IN addition to injuries from these, I would not rule out spreading such mutations.

For other combat injuries: Eldar probably won't come up in your setting, but their primary weapons are monofilament guns. Dark eldar use poisoned needleguns, but also pretty uncommon enemies by the numbers. Orks are good old fashioned bullets and blades. Necrons use gauss, which is like a particle beam and leaves severe burns if it does not kill outright. Tau use modified and safer versions of the imperial plasma weaponry. Tyranids don't leave survivors.

Also, your character would have been considered a godsend among the imperial guard. Even a low sister hospitalier is going to be better than a veteran doctor in the IG. The IG are more or less considered disposable by the rest of the imperium, so not only are they receiving aid from a superior soldier, but if you actually gave a damn about them double brownie points. The Space Marines don't give two cares about their IG comrades, just seeing them as pawns and having no qualms exterminating entire armies if they saw something they were not supposed to see (Inquisition, Grey Knights...). Likewise, your IG counterpart is the apothecary, who spends most of their time sucking the gene seed out of fallen marines and making the mortally wounded into dreadnaughts.

The part about the wound types actually helps alot. I can do some more detailed stuff about that in her background as well.

I indeed wanted to let her be some god-sent figure in the IG, I hope that becomes clear int he background and the 'diary' fragment.

I do have some knowledge about the races (I played the tabletop game as well, being greyknight, so I do know some of their history, major lore stuff, since I read the codex for pleasure. I practicly read and saw alot of the stuff on the net, mostly in the form of videos on youtube. Vaults of Terra are amazing, but I have not read any novels, shich is why I probably miss a level of depth in the setting like how the people experience theirworld. Although I read some fanwork about some guardsman who gets rescued by a Sister of battle and eventually even marries her, but apart from this I mostly just know the more general lore form a more theoretical point of view, i guess.

Thank you for this detailsed info, it helps alot. I am revicing my background now, so maybe you got some feedback on that as well, when it's finished