Zehridamus
2016-07-20, 12:26 PM
I feel like an entirely compendium of magic items with multilingual pun names is now inevitable. Well done.
Inevitable, indeed. I couldn't resist.
This is a joke thread, and I'm basically just going to post magic items, spells, and the like whenever I see the joke present. Power levels are irrelevant; as long as it fits the inconsistencies between different languages, it's fine.
A little something to start off with:
THE PAIN
Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement)
This item appears as an innocuous baguette. However, when the loaf is used to smack somebody, they are overcome with unspeakable waves of pain, unable to act because of it. Once per day, while attuned to the bread, you can use an action to make an attack roll against an enemy with the baguette. You have proficiency on the attack roll. On a hit, the target must make a Constitution saving throw (DC 19) or be stunned, as it is wracked with unbearable pain. Alternatively, you can break off a piece of the bread. The bread can divide into 7 pieces. Upon a creature consuming a piece of the bread, they are subject to the same Constitution save to avoid being stunned. They need not consume the whole piece, but the piece loses its magic as soon as it affects a creature.
This property can't be used again until 10 a.m. of the next day. The item retains its magic for 7 days, after which it begins to mold and loses its magic.
Inevitable, indeed. I couldn't resist.
This is a joke thread, and I'm basically just going to post magic items, spells, and the like whenever I see the joke present. Power levels are irrelevant; as long as it fits the inconsistencies between different languages, it's fine.
A little something to start off with:
THE PAIN
Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement)
This item appears as an innocuous baguette. However, when the loaf is used to smack somebody, they are overcome with unspeakable waves of pain, unable to act because of it. Once per day, while attuned to the bread, you can use an action to make an attack roll against an enemy with the baguette. You have proficiency on the attack roll. On a hit, the target must make a Constitution saving throw (DC 19) or be stunned, as it is wracked with unbearable pain. Alternatively, you can break off a piece of the bread. The bread can divide into 7 pieces. Upon a creature consuming a piece of the bread, they are subject to the same Constitution save to avoid being stunned. They need not consume the whole piece, but the piece loses its magic as soon as it affects a creature.
This property can't be used again until 10 a.m. of the next day. The item retains its magic for 7 days, after which it begins to mold and loses its magic.