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View Full Version : Pathfinder Abberant race design with backstory. Critiques appreciated



Subura
2016-08-01, 08:47 PM
So this is my first race ive ever attempted to create and I'm worried I might have gone overboard and made it too strong maybe? I basically want to know if I did way too much lol

created race
The Threzthsh
The Threzthsh Are very rare. Some believe them to be myth. Most of them being human warriors in the past who fell in battle only to be raised again in a different timezone with knowledge of history that they should not know. Now neither alive nor undead and branded with the mark of something... alien... something OLD. They must adjust to their new environment and the changes and energies flowing throughout their warped bodies. Whatever brought them back had soo much power that it most likely uknowingly left god like energy flowing through their bodies causing this plane of existence to reject them leaving them vulnerable to both the elements and sunlight itself, leaving only their bodies ability to constantly change and repair itself between them and their demise. They are usually driven a bit mad by this process. Their alighnment in life is always Nuetral but after being brought back they must be chaotic nuetral. In-between their nuetral nature in life and the chaotic evil nature of the being that brought them back.

appearance
They look how they looked in life with one or two changes on the surface however underneath their skin, their anatomy is
constantly shifting and changing. (My character will have brown skin with scales, wings hidden beneath the surface of their skin, a tail that can split into two and he has never ending pit for eyes.)


Type
Humanoid(human/abberation) -3
-----13 RP.-----
have the darkvision 60 feet racial trait.
breathes, but does not need to eat or sleep (although they can do so if they wish).


Size
Medium

Base Speed
30 feet

Ability Modifiers
+2 Con, +2 char, -2 wis


Languages
Common and Aklo

Traits
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Negative Energy Affinity (+1 RP) 11 RP Left
Prerequisites: None.
Weakness: A member of this race is alive, but is healed by negative energy and harmed by positive energy, as if it were an undead creature.

Light Blindness (+2 RP) 13 RP Left
Prerequisites: Darkvision or see in darkness trait.
Weakness: Abrupt exposure to bright light blinds members of this race for 1 round; on subsequent rounds, they are dazzled as long as they remain in the affected area.

Light Sensitivity (+1 RP) 14 RP Left
Prerequisites: Darkvision.
Weakness: Members of this race are dazzled as long as they remain in an area of bright light.

Resurrection Vulnerability (+1 RP) 15 RP Left
Prerequisites: Half-undead subtype or undead type.
Weakness: A raise dead spell cast on a member of this race can destroy it (Will negates). Using the spell in this way does not require a material component.

Elemental Vulnerability (+8 RP) 23 RP Left
vulnerable to them all
Prerequisites: Outsider (native) with ties to an elemental plane.
Weakness: Pick one of the following energy types: acid, cold, electricity, or fire. Members of this race have vulnerability to the chosen energy type. They cannot posses any racial trait that
grants them resistance or immunity to this energy type.
Special: This trait can be taken multiple times. Each time it is taken, choose a different energy type. If a race has vulnerability to fire and immunity to cold, it gains the cold subtype.
If a race has vulnerability to cold and immunity to fire, it gains the fire subtype.

Fast Healing (-6 RP) 17 RP Left (I adjusted trait)
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Members of this race regain 1 hit point each round. Except for where noted here, fast healing is just like natural healing. Fast healing does not restore hit points lost from starvation,
thirst, or suffocation, nor does it allow a creature to regrow lost body parts. Fast healing continues to function (even at negative hit points) until a member of this race dies, at which point
the effects of fast healing immediately end.

Gliding Wings (3 RP) 14 RP Left
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Members of this race take no damage from falling (as if subject to a constant non-magical feather fall spell). While in midair, members of this race can move up to 5 feet in any
horizontal direction for every 1 foot they fall, at a speed of 60 feet per round. A member of a race with gliding wings cannot gain height with these wings alone; it merely coasts in other
directions as it falls. If subjected to a strong wind or any other effect that causes a creature with gliding wings to rise, it can take advantage of the updraft to increase the distance it can
glide.

Natural Armor (-2 RP) 12 RP Left
Members of this race gain a +1 natural armor bonus to their Armor Class.

Change Shape, Greater (6 RP) 6 RP Left
Prerequisites: Aberration, dragon, fey, humanoid, or monstrous humanoid type.
Benefit: Members of this race gain the following supernatural ability: a member of this race can assume the appearance of a Small or Medium humanoid as the alter self spell, save that it does not
adjust its ability scores.

Spell-Like Ability, lesser (-2 RP) 4 RP
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Choose a 2nd or lower level spell that does not attack a creature or deal damage. Members of this race can use this spell as a spell-like ability once per day. The caster level of
the spell is equal to the user's character level.
Special: This trait costs as many RP as the level of the spell chosen. This trait can be taken up to three times. Each time you take an additional spell, adjust the RP cost of this trait
appropriately.(spell: False Life)

Spell-Like Ability, Greater (-4 RP) 0 RP
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Choose a 3rd-level or 4th-level spell that does not attack a creature or deal damage. Members of this race can use this spell as a spell-like ability once per day. The caster level of
the spell is equal to the user's character level.
Special: This trait costs as many RP as the level of the spell chosen. This trait can be taken up to three times. Each time you take an additional spell, adjust the RP cost of this trait
appropriately. (spell: Monstrous Physique II) (upgrade spell every 5 levels)

TheYell
2016-08-01, 09:12 PM
Not sure i understand hhe energy vulnerability. they have the same vulnerability as joe the peasant or they are more vulnerable to all types of energy?

Subura
2016-08-01, 09:16 PM
They are vulnerable to all forms of energy except negative energy.

Subura
2016-08-01, 10:40 PM
so i've been told that the quick healing might be op for a pc character. Is this better?

Type
Humanoid(human/abberation) -3
-----12 RP.-----
have the darkvision 60 feet racial trait.
breathes, but does not need to eat or sleep (although they can do so if they wish).


Size
Medium



Base Speed
30 feet



Ability Modifiers
+2 Con, +2 char, -2 wis




Languages
Common and Aklo



Traits
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Negative Energy Affinity (+1 RP) 10 RP Left
Prerequisites: None.
Weakness: A member of this race is alive, but is healed by negative energy and harmed by positive energy, as if it were an undead creature.

Light Blindness (+2 RP) 12 RP Left
Prerequisites: Darkvision or see in darkness trait.
Weakness: Abrupt exposure to bright light blinds members of this race for 1 round; on subsequent rounds, they are dazzled as long as they remain in the affected area.

Light Sensitivity (+1 RP) 13 RP Left
Prerequisites: Darkvision.
Weakness: Members of this race are dazzled as long as they remain in an area of bright light.

Resurrection Vulnerability (+1 RP) 14 RP Left
Prerequisites: Half-undead subtype or undead type.
Weakness: A raise dead spell cast on a member of this race can destroy it (Will negates). Using the spell in this way does not require a material component.

Elemental Vulnerability (+8 RP) 22 RP Left
vulnerable to them all
Prerequisites: Outsider (native) with ties to an elemental plane.
Weakness: Pick one of the following energy types: acid, cold, electricity, or fire. Members of this race have vulnerability to the chosen energy type. They cannot posses any racial trait that grants them resistance or immunity to this energy type.
Special: This trait can be taken multiple times. Each time it is taken, choose a different energy type. If a race has vulnerability to fire and immunity to cold, it gains the cold subtype. If a race has vulnerability to cold and immunity to fire, it gains the fire subtype.

Gliding Wings (-3 RP) 19 RP Left
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Members of this race take no damage from falling (as if subject to a constant non-magical feather fall spell). While in midair, members of this race can move up to 5 feet in any horizontal direction for every 1 foot they fall, at a speed of 60 feet per round. A member of a race with gliding wings cannot gain height with these wings alone; it merely coasts in other directions as it falls. If subjected to a strong wind or any other effect that causes a creature with gliding wings to rise, it can take advantage of the updraft to increase the distance it can glide.

Natural Armor (-2 RP) 17 RP Left
Members of this race gain a +1 natural armor bonus to their Armor Class.

Improved Natural Armor (-1 RP) 16 RP Left
Prerequisites: Natural armor racial trait.
Benefit: Members of this race gain a +1 natural armor bonus.
Special: This racial trait can be taken multiple times. Each additional time you take this trait, increase its cost by 1 RP. Its effects stack.

Change Shape, Greater (6 RP) 10 RP Left
Prerequisites: Aberration, dragon, fey, humanoid, or monstrous humanoid type.
Benefit: Members of this race gain the following supernatural ability: a member of this race can assume the appearance of a Small or Medium humanoid as the alter self spell, save that it does not
adjust its ability scores.

Spell-Like Ability, lesser (-2 RP) 8 RP
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Choose a 2nd or lower level spell that does not attack a creature or deal damage. Members of this race can use this spell as a spell-like ability once per day. The caster level of
the spell is equal to the user's character level.
Special: This trait costs as many RP as the level of the spell chosen. This trait can be taken up to three times. Each time you take an additional spell, adjust the RP cost of this trait appropriately.(spell: False Life)

Spell-Like Ability, Greater (-4 RP) 4 RP
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Choose a 3rd-level or 4th-level spell that does not attack a creature or deal damage. Members of this race can use this spell as a spell-like ability once per day. The caster level of
the spell is equal to the user's character level.
Special: This trait costs as many RP as the level of the spell chosen. This trait can be taken up to three times. Each time you take an additional spell, adjust the RP cost of this trait appropriately. (spell: Monstrous Physique II)

Spell-Like Ability, Greater (-4 RP) 0 RP
Prerequisites: None.
Benefit: Choose a 3rd-level or 4th-level spell that does not attack a creature or deal damage. Members of this race can use this spell as a spell-like ability once per day. The caster level of
the spell is equal to the user's character level.
Special: This trait costs as many RP as the level of the spell chosen. This trait can be taken up to three times. Each time you take an additional spell, adjust the RP cost of this trait appropriately. (blood tentacles)

PapaQuackers
2016-08-01, 10:52 PM
I didn't really have enough time to the view the whole race but I just wanted to pop into let you know that a good way to get people to examine and critique your work is to put the tag PEACH in the title. It basically stands for please evaluate and critique, you'll see the tag on a lot of stuff around here.

Subura
2016-08-01, 11:06 PM
Oh, thank you for the tip. appreciate it! :)