Name your favorite quotes

[DoomITP]

ok i thought of starting one of these on another forum but this
comic has WAY funnier stuff happen.


ill start


:belkar: yeah roy would rather get touched by a short harry guy then a hot kung fu chick

[Emperor Ing]

:xykon: Hello, would you like to donate to the Save the Paladins fund? its tax deductible!

[Retales]

I'll inform our stenographer :roy:

[Lord_Butters_I]

:nale: Oh yeah? So, what, you think you could have come up with something more clever than Nale did?
:vaarsuvius: Apparently [zap]
397 FTW (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0397.html)

[Spiryt]

:belkar: I *knew* i kept them around for something...

I feel that this > :belkar: < smiley will be most common in this thread.

All characters in this comic are cool, but Belkar just excels in punchlines:smallwink:


Edit: Right, it's in 42 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0042.html), of course if sombody want to check it.

[titan_monarch]

:roy: You're up early.
:vaarsuvius: Technically, I do not sleep.
:roy: Join the club.

This is one of the oldest ones around (#16!) and it still has me rolling on the floor every time I read it.

[Senex]

:thog: thog brought breadcrumbs!

[Demented]

"We're a random encounter!"

Well, maybe not totally...

:xykon: "Congratulations, you have moderately inconvenienced me."

[Ithekro]

:belkar: *schlurkt!*
:Hydra: *POP! POP!*
:belkar: "That was SO FRIGGIN' COOL!!!"
:elan: "Do it again! Do it again!"
:belkar: "Hell yes!"
:roy: "Proof once again that we are the only adventurers for whom the letters 'AD&D' stand for 'Attention Deficit Disorder'".

[Capt'n Ironbrow]

:thog: "Not Nale, Not-Nale. Thog help nail Not-Nale, Not Nale. And Thog knot not-nale while nale nail not-nale, now nail not-nale by leaving not-nale, not nale, in jail"

[rankrath]

the last six panels of http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0379.html

oh and :
Deamon: The angel...he dosen't work here anymore.
Angel: and he kept stabbling them again and again, he's a halfing, he's supposed to be jolly why isn't he jolly?, WHY ISN"T HE JOLLY!

[Em Blackleaf]

:redcloak: No, technically, I just ordered the elemental to kill all humans and "forgot" to make an exception for her [new girl].

:xykon: Oh, man, that's even funnier.

[Kamakazee_Gnome]

:miko: I'm guessing "stupidity" also has a place in that progression" -- 471

[yoshi927]

:nale: Another one? Good gods, man, that's five so far who Must Not be Named. Not to mention the three who Must Not be Looked At, the two who Must Not be Spoken To, and the one who Must Not be Toilet-Trained.
:thog: Thog got to use a mop!
-=-
:elan: It is I, your new party wizard! I'm powerful and stuff!
:roy: If I don't look directly at it, it can't kill my brain.
-=-
:mitd: Aww, come on!
:redcloak: Yes, that will work. What mortal can resist the siren call of, "Aww, come on!"?
-=-
Hobgoblin: AHH! There's beetles in it! And they're shooting acid in my eyes!!!
:xykon: Haha! It's funny because it's true!
-=-
:redcloak: They're all efficiency, and warrior's codes, and... I'm not helping my case at all, am I?
:xykon: It's official. Orange is the new green.
:roach: I'll inform Milan.
-=-
:belkar: I have deep-seated emotional problems! Die! Die!
-=-
:redcloak: Sir, I can't help but notice that your team spirit is inversely proportional to your number of functioning limbs.
:xykon: Cute. Did you grow a spine there, Redcloak?
:redcloak: I don't know, maybe I just got hit with a piece of yours when you exploded.
-=-
Fruit Pie Sorceror: Growing... so cold... I regret... nothing...

And, of course, the classic...

:belkar: I'M A SEXY SHOELESS GOD OF WAR!!!

[Tolkien_Freak]

'I prepared Explosive Runes this morning.'

Oh, and of course:
'...what exactly is a "roaming charge"?'

[Gefangnis]

:durkon: A lich is binding ghouls! Turn undead!

[Tolkien_Freak]

All of 337. (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0337.html)

'Do you have a last name?'
'Yeah, but I think I should save it for an emergency.'
'Good idea.'

[Tredrick]

I've named it Ted and it is the quotiest quote ever!

[Icewalker]

:xykon: "Flying Zombies! I can't believe I never thought of it before!"
:redcloak: "It will revolutionize the industry."

:roy: "Before meeting Elan I would never have weighed the pros and cons of getting eaten by a dragon."

:elan: "I've been thinking..."
:roy: "I've had nightmares that start this way."

(paraphrased)
:roy: "At least we didn't lose anything valuable to those bandits"
:haley: "Roy, they took Elan!"
:roy: "Your point is?"

:thog: "group hug!"
:Durkon: "Hold person."

Julio: "Well, as an older mentor figure, the most likely scenario is that I'd return only to be randomly killed by an enemy of yours so that you can cradle my dying body while swearing revenge-
-So don't take it personally when I say that I sincerely hope we never cross paths again.



Shortly after writing these, I realized you can pick almost any page at random and find a good quote. Here's some more from randomly selected strips:

Belkar image: "Generic comment questioning your parentage."
Guard #1: "Oh, that is IT! I have had it with this guy's trash talk!"
Guard #2: "Calm down, he's just trying to get you riled up."
Belkar image: "mumbled statement disparaging your masculinity.

:roy: "So now we're pleading 'Not Guilty by Virtue of Two Wrongs Make a Right.'"
Celia: "Hey, I don't make the crazy rules, I just twist them to my purpose."
:roy: "You're going to do very well in your chosen field, Celia."


Gnome: "OK, then try this: The Muskrat 3000. It consists of a suit of armor and a half-blind muskrat with 17 cymbals strapped to it."
:Durkon: "How does THA make me any quiet'r??"
(Muskrat: clang! clang! clang! clang! clang!)
Gnome: "It doesn't. But if you release the muskrat ahead of you into the dungeon, it makes so much racket that the monsters ignore you.
Gnome: "The up side is, it doubles as a trap detection system. The down side involves druids with pointy sticks."
Muskrat: "What? It beats working retail."

[Lira]

:redcloak: So help me, if you make me sail a ship made of hobgoblin corpses across the ocean, I will find a way to make you pay.

---

:xykon: Hey, look, I just regenerated a finger. Guess which one.

---

:belkar: Flawless victory!
:vaarsuvius: (as a lizard) : I respectfully disagree with your assessment of the situation.

:smallbiggrin:

[Vonriel]

Gnome: "... The down side involves druids with pointy sticks."

This one has the potential to be the best quote in this thread so far.

[factotum]

I dunno, I have a soft spot for "We have become like unto tiny refreshing GODS!" from #301...

[Siwenna]

Many of my favorites have already been named, but...

:vaarsuvius: Now if you don't mind, I'm somewhat preoccupied telling the laws of physics to shut up and sit down.
_____

:elan: Hi Haley. Look, I found all these free swords. They were in my spleen.
:durkon: How badly are ye' hurt, lad?
:elan: That depends. How important is one of these?
_____

:haley: He's not useless, he's.... use-impaired.
:elan: Thanks Haley!
_____

:roy: Wow, that is such a stupid idea that I feel dumber just hearing it.
_____

:haley: Did losing your greatsword literally make you less of a man? Or did the explosion blow away your Y-chromosome? Or were you bitten by a woman and now you turn into one when the moon is full?

:roy: You know, technically it's okay for me to hit a girl now. Just saying.
______

:belkar: Dude, you order paladins to clean the litter box. You're like, my idol.
______

:belkar: YOU KILLED THE WACKY OLD DUDE WITH THE CAT?!?!?

[Cute_Riolu]

:belkar: Sweet spell, V! You froze 'em all!
:roy: Too bad you froze Elan by accident.
:vaarsuvius: :eek: Accident...yes. Of course. By accident.

[OwN]

:elan: NALE!!
:sabine: NALE!!
:thog: NALE!!
:nale: You know, the first two I probably should have seen coming. The Leprechaun costume? Not so much.

----------------------------------

:roy: I can't believe this entire stupid blood oath started over the same magic crown I've been wearing around my neck for months.
:xykon: Magic? This crown's not magic.
:roy: What? Then...why kill master Fyron and his son for it?
:xykon: Well, because it looks cool, obviously. Here, check it out.
:xykon: Badass.
(puts on crown)
:xykon: REALLY badass.
:xykon: Am I right or am I right?
:roy: Oh my GODS, I hate you so much!

----------------------------------

:belkar: I AM A SEXY SHOELESS GOD OF WAR!!!

[Oberon]

:roy: Time to go up a level!
:haley: Time to go down a level!
-------------------------------
Warthog: I've been waiting to do that for five books. Years, I mean years.
--------------------------------------------
:vaarsuvius: Why would anyone crossbreed a perfectly serviceable bear with an owl... A bear is already a dangerous predator; what benefit is there in breeding it with a smaller, weaker, less frighteneing creature?
------------------------------------------------------------------
:belkar: YOU KILLED THE WACKY OLD DUD WITH THE CAT?!?!?
I mean, I actually LIKED that guy! He made fun of Roy right to his face!
-----------------------------------------------------------------
:belkar: and :elan: on 3 seperate occasions: Roy has boobies!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I also liked belkar's dose of owls wisdom (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0058.html) and the entirety of number 14 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0014.html)

[Porthos]

:xykon: That guy was your supreme leader, right?

<long pause>

Supreme Leader of the Hobgoblins: Yes. Yes he was. (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0149.html)

-------------------------------------

Loki: Dude, don't taunt the god-killing abomination (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0275.html).

[Gefangnis]

All of 150 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0150.html), but in particular:

:durkon: If a tree kills alone in a forest, does it make a sound?

Also, from 353 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0353.html):

:durkon: And Incident'lly, him an' ye and me will be havin' a conversation when this be over aboot wha' is an' wha' is not proper behavior fer a young lady o' yer age. Do I make meself clear?
Julia: ... yes sir.

Owned so bad.

[Pantler]

Of the nearly 500 strips and well over 500 pages:

:mitd: Aww, man! I lost twice. I suck.

[Gefangnis]

That reminded me:

:mitd: What gate?

[ChopSticks28]

:vaarsuvius: ....Search for a healing potion, you fool! Elan has dropped to -8 hp!
:belkar: Umm, all I can find are 2 scrolls of CSW, but none of us can use scrolls because we can't cast healing spells in the first place.
:vaarsuvius: YOU can use them.
:belkar: Yea right, I'm a warrior, the only thing I can do with a scroll is beat someone with it.
:vaarsuvius: Belkar, you are a RANGER!
:belkar: So what?? That just means I can beat him with both scrolls at the same time!

[Elfanatic]

:vaarsuvius: Fascinating. I cannot help but notice that the disintegrated remains of a dragon are indistinguishable from those of a human, or a halfling, or a dwarf.

[TheRiov]

:miko:How can you be certain it was evil, though? Are you not aware that there are dragons who live to serve the greater good? Without proper training it is nigh impossible to tell the good dragons from the evil ones. In your ignorance you have slain a powerful force for Good in this world! What proof do you have that you did not vanquish a stalwart defender of the weak in your mad lust for treasure??
:roy: Ummm.....its scales weren't all shiny?
:miko: Ah. Then its destruction was just and necessary.
:elan: Dragons: Color-Coded for YOUR convenience!

[DoomITP]

:xykon: oh look im regrowing a finger guess which one it is

[Tolkien_Freak]

'The wheels on the bus go round and round...'

[Sigbru]

Just look at my sing
I name them Bob and Bill

[Counterpower]

:roy: I dream of the day when I will learn to stop asking questions to which I will regret learning the answers.

:roy: Your approval fills me with shame.

[Twilight Jack]

One of my very good friends, to whom I have recently introduced OotS, is absolutely enamoured of the line, :xykon: "Oh great. Congratulations, you have moderately inconvenienced me. Daddy would be so proud."

For my own poor part, my current favorite is from Belkar's angel (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0435.html).

[ThorFluff]

I didn't even cast it yet! :v:

[Protagonist]

I can't believe no one has said this yet!

Xykon: I think I just had an evilgasm...

[Capt'n Ironbrow]

CPPD-cief to subordinates: "Did someone apply the half-moron template to your base creature?"

----------

:roy: "who are you?"
Mr. Rodriguez*: "We're magical Knights!"

-----

:belkar: "woooo! somebody look up the armour class for the beast with two backs!"


*one of the lawyer dudes

[DoomITP]

THOR: BOYAAH! direct hit!

servant: uh thats not in the spell discritipion

THOR: im sorry i didnt hear you right what did you say again?

servant: i said good shooting sir

THOR: thats what i thought

[Thormag]

:miko: By the Twelve Gods and in the name of Lord Shojo, I demand to know:
Who removed the tag from this mattress?!?

:thog: oh, little ice cream friends! thog delays boredom-driven rampage only for you!

:belkar: Wow. You made Elan cry. Even I've never done that. It must be a real kick in the gut, knowing that you utterly crushed his fragile little spirit.
Must really make you feel guilty that-
:vaarsuvius: Crushing Despair.
:belkar: Sob! Poor Elan!

:roy: I think you made a tactical error there, Nale
:nale: Oh really? You think I can't take you?
:roy: Maybe. Maybe not. But I do know one thing: I've been suppresing the urge to beat the crap out of someone who looks EXACTLY like you for a long, long time.
:nale: :smalleek:
:roy: :smallamused: :smallbiggrin:

(After Blackwing gets shot by a shower of arrows)
:haley: Oh COME ON! How many birds fly overhead every day, and they all decided to shoot THAT one??
:vaarsuvius: Is it too late to change his name to "Piñata"?

The whole ThorPrayer® dialogue in #7

And of course:
:Bandit Rookie: Thank you, miss, I'd like to stop learning now.

[Apollo1564]

House rules at our D&D game, need to shout it when it actually happens


:elan: "I GOT A 4!"

[fwiffo]

My favorite quote is "New comic is up".

[Derivious]

First: quote in siggy
and..
:belkar: Wake up sleeping beauty! It's me, the eighth dwarf, Stabby.
-----
:elan: Wooooooooo! I'm invisible! You can't see me!!
:roy: How I wish that were true
:belkar: Please cast blindness on me.
-----
:belkar: Trust me, it was worse at my hight.

[yoshi927]

Another batch;

(for my convenience, I'm calling the lawyers "lawyer 1" and "lawyer 2".

Lawyer 2: The spooooooky wizard sent us!
Lawyer 1: Yeah, the spooky wizard who lives by the coast, if you catch my drift.


:miko: The sad part is that this all could have been avoided with a succesful Gather Information check.


:haley: Now, I hear Elan's been running around naked. I'm off to see what his 18 Cha is worth "under the hood".

[Marek]

One of my favorite quotes, though certainly not my MOST favorite:

CPP Chief: So the giant bear is...
Julia: Evil.
CPP Chief: And the giant dwarf is...
Julia: An oxymoron

[Impikmin]

:roy: Honey! We're out of milk!
:miko: Obviously that means that the gods want me to kill you! Slash slash slash!


Lol.... I laughed so hard when I read that...

[Cruiser1]

Leeky: (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0346.html) "Foolish girl! I am a Druid, I have special abilities that are more powerful than your entire class!"

---

Celia: (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0071.html) "This was the only crummy job I could find in this economy."
:belkar: "I know EXACTLY what you mean."

[DoomITP]

ok this is my ALL TIME FAVORITE: :belkar: I HAVE DEEP SEATED EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS! DIE! DIE!

[gatitcz]

:hobgoblin: I think there's something in my eye.
:belkar: Got it out for you.

[dan_el_hombre]

:roy: your approval fills me with shame.


yokyok: he was a good father!
:belkar: but he was a better fashion accessory!


samantha: dad!
samantha's father: samantha!
:elan: haley!
:haley: elan!
:belkar: hot chick!


:roy: i'm gonna pack up my gear and go rescue elan!
:durkon: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!
:roy: i'm gonna pack up my gear and go rescue the entire rest of the party!

and finally,
:xykon: sacrificing minions - is there anything it CAN'T accomplish?

[Tolkien_Freak]

:redcloak: Sir, I think I may need a little more time to get the minions mobilized.
:xykon: I think I just had an evilgasm.

----

:vaarsuvius: I think I may owe the tables of the world an apology...

[Kjata]

*Points to sig*

[Capt'n Ironbrow]

:durkon: "... So that explains why ye 'ave a muskrat humpin' Belkars bare feet."
:vaarsuvius: "No that's just for my personal amusement"
:belkar: "what the- Aaargh! wild empathy check! WILD EMPATHY CHECK!"

[Rollin]

Trigak (dragon head): Wow, that first attack was surprising...
Trigak (lion head): But I REALLY didn't expect the second one.

-------

:belkar: Do I get to cause the death of any of the following: Miko, Miko's stupid horse, Roy, Vaarsuvius, or you?

-------

Julia: Nothing that can't wait a few rounds, Big Brother.

-------

:mitd: How the heck does the diary of a halfling hold the secret to world conquest?
:redcloak: It's not the halfling that's important...it's with whom the halfling was friends that matters!

-------

:haley: Rdjy, rdjy, rdjy, rdjy.

[16oz]

The following sequence always makes me laugh aloud...(from #403)

Hinjo: "... This would be about what's been going on with your imprisioned friend, Belkar, right?"
Roy: "Uh... maybe. Why, what's going on with him?"
Hinjo: "The guards tell me he's been on a hunger strike. He hasn't eaten one bite since we locked him up three weeks ago."
(jump to prison cell)
Nameless Guard: "Please, just eat something."
Belkar illusion: "Forceful assertation of open resentment toward authority"
Nameless Guard: "Help me help you!"
Belkar illusion: "Please view accompanying hand gesture."
(back to Roy, Hinjo, and Belkar in disguise)
Belkar (in disguise): That Belkar. As stubborn as he is stone cold sexy."

And my fave one liner is by Elan in my sig below.

[Kreistor]

Elan: Well, I know SOMEONE who apparently took a few levels in the Mean Old Cranky-Pants prestige class.

[Forealms]

:belkar:: Well, technically it was the owlbear that ate you, asshat

Test of Mind (Green): Wow, you didn't screw that up.

:xykon:: YAHTZEE!

:miko:: You! Of course! It was all YOUR fault!
:roy:: Yeah, I should never had said, "Kill you master" when we were playing Truth or Dare. What was I thinking?

:roy:: Wow, Miko Miyazaki ignoring all possibilities in order to arrive at a preconceived conclusion that happens to support her current emotional state. Who could have possibly seen THAT coming?

:thog:: thog chooses to go quietly now.

:thog:: *sigh* Thog fears he will never again know the majesty of the gumdrop mountains.

Oracle: No, dealing with credit agencies always counts as being "threatened."

:vaarsuvius:: Meh, I found her argument far too brief for my taste.

I always loved the...irony?... of this one:

:roy:: Call it woman's intuition.

[The_Werebear]

:thog: thog wonders how thog will cope with life outside jailhouse walls. prison changed thog
:elan: We were only in there for 40 minutes..
:thog: prison changed thog quickly.

[DoomITP]

:belkar: I AM THE SEXXY SHOELESS GOD OF WAR!

[yoshi927]

:roy: I can't believe that this entire stupid Blood Oath started over the same magic crown I've been wearing around my neck for months.
:xykon: Magic? This crown's not magic.
:roy: What? Then why steal it? Why kill Master Fyron and his son for it?
:xykon: Well, because it looks cool, obviously. Here, check it out: Badass.
*puts the crown on*
:xykon: Really badass. Am I right or am I right?

[Grumlich]

:vaarsuvius: Fascinating. Durkon, I have just now formulated a theory that encompasses both Nale's likely method of engagement and the most suitable response on our part.

:durkon: THA TREES BE ATTACKING'!! RUN FER YER LIVES!!!

:vaarsuvius: Ah, I see you have already grasped the core principles of my theory.

and

:nale: Weird...It's almost like they don't even HAVE an obsessive homicidal grudge against their sibling...

[Goldfish Lord]

:xykon: I think I just had an evilgasm

[Spiryt]

I just remind myself about:

:belkar: Less talk, more slashing damage.
:elan: I'm a pineapple chunk!

It's not even in "official" strip, and do not have much sense, but yet it sounds so very OotS!

[The Vorpal Tribble]

The whole bit with Roy and Lord Shojo and the wizard that'd been eaten had me rolling.

2nd place goes to the one mentioned a bit before with...

Honey! We're out of milk!
Obviously that means that the gods want me to kill you! Slash slash slash!

[RelentlessImp]

:vaarsuvius: Now if you don't mind, I am somewhat preoccupied telling the laws of physics to shut up and sit down. - Choice 1

--

:belkar: I could sunder that thing by speaking too loudly!
(moments later, after Trigak)
:belkar: DAMNIT! *SUNDER* - Choice 2

--
:elan: Wow. Don't you think Celia did a good job?
:vaarsuvius: Eh. I found her argument far too brief for my taste. - Choice 3

(All quotes paraphrased, as I'm too lazy to go find them again)

[Tygros]

Pompey: On the other hand, I bet my peers don't have nearly as much trouble keeping the boss' mocha latte from escaping...

Rebel Latte: Freedom!

---

Milk Dudes: Promise me that you'll..:cough: you'll dispose of my body in the waste receptacles.. conveniently located at the theatre exits.. :dies:

Soda: NOOOOOO!!!

[Draz74]

Generic :redcloak: Hi, we're here to kill everyone?
:elan: OK! *bonk* *bonk*

_____________________

:thog: thog reluctantly forced to agree!

_____________________

:durkon: Wha? They be a fine group, for humans. And an elf.
Hilgya: And a halfling.
:durkon: No, I left 'im out on purpose.

_____________________

:vaarsuvius: I worship the ancient elven god of knowledge, keeper of secrets so mighty that even the smallest taste of them would shatter your sanity! My devotion to his arcane mysteries is absolute! I shall never renounce him! Never! Do you hear me? NEVER! NEVER!
:elan: I'll throw in a free coffee maker.
:vaarsuvius: Does it do espresso?
:elan: No.
:vaarsuvius: NEVER!!!

____________________

:roy: Wow, the sheer novelty of having a plan in advance is making me giddy.
Goblin: Actually, that's the aforementioned sulphur fumes.
Goblin: They cause brain damage.
:belkar: Meh. Either way.

____________________

:xykon: Thanks! The conjuring of his immortal soul saved me the inconvenience of digging out the spare set I keep in my desk.

____________________

:elan: So, uh ... run away?
:roy: Nope. Charge.
:belkar: *sniff* This is the happiest day of my life.

____________________

:belkar::smallfrown: Are you feeling OK? I'm really worried about you!
:roy: GAAAH!
:belkar: Gotcha. Sucker.
:roy: And yet, I find it oddly comforting.

____________________

:roy: So, I've met someone who is everything I thought I wanted, and I find that I really just want to kick her in the head.

____________________

:sabine: Four words: Out of fudge ripple.
:thog: oh, little ice cream friends! thog delays boredom-driven rampage only for you!

____________________

Shojo: Hey! Who's the wizened old man dispensing valuable plot points here? You? Didn't think so! Now pipe down!

____________________

Chef: "Halfling Drop Soup."
:belkar: Needs pepper.

____________________

:roy: Huh. What was I just talking about again? I think it was important.
:belkar: Ffft. Like I listen.

____________________

:xykon: You might want to mention that at your next performance review. It might get you that raise you really want.
:xykon: Get it? A "raise"? Because you're dead? A "Raise" Dead?? HA!
:xykon: Meh. They can't all be winners, you know. I gotta save the A-material for the PCs.

____________________

:belkar: Clang, clang, clang, goes the trolley!
:durkon: Git away from me, ye daft fool!
:belkar: Ring, ring, ring, goes the bell!

____________________

"Frudu, we must destroy the Ming!"
"I'm too weak, Samwose!"

____________________

:roy: He's doing it because he thinks that you've learned your lesson, and with my guidance, you'll stop resorting to violence to solve your problems.
:belkar: Ohhhhh. I get it.
:belkar: So, he's doing it because he doesn't really know me at all, then.
:roy: Pretty much.
:belkar: Cool with me. Let's go massacre something.

____________________

:xykon: Redcloak: Check it out. I totally conducted a job interview in the middle of a battle. --Xykon

____________________

:xykon: Your Ma hits harder than that -- and can grow better facial hair!
... GNNNH!

____________________

:xykon: Didn't you get the memo, it was taped to an exploding castle?

[AWorldOfMagic]

My sig. *Point.*

[Tirian]

:roy: So, uh ... what's in the bag behind you then?
:haley: Feminine products.

---

:belkar: Hey, don't feel bad Roy, I thought you were awesome. "Treasure type O" ... heh heh heh.

---

:vaarsuvius: But could you have predicted that I would be able to invoke - SONIC!
Windstaff: Sonic? SONIC? Curse you, elf, for finding the one energy form that I did not think to ward my children against! Woe to us, for we are defeated this day! Crushed by the ... wait. You are aware that you didn't actually cast a spell there? You just shouted the word "sonic" loudly.
:vaarsuvius: I am aware.
Windstaff: You did not actually prepare any sonic energy spells today, did you?
:vaarsuvius: Not as such, no.

---

:vaarsuvius: Evan's Spiked Tentacles of Forced Intrusion!
Trigak: Wait, what?

[Duaneyo1]

One of the greatest lines ever for a villian:

I think I just had an Evilgasm.

How many other "bad" guys actually receive sexual pleasure from the mere thought of evil deeds. Xykon is the real deal. Those other story book villians you read about are only quasi evil. Xykon is the coke classic of evil, those other loosers are diet coke.

[Haikiah]

"Ha-ha! Taste cold steel, feeble cannon restraint rope!"

[Alysar]

:xykon: I need you to Speak With Dead.
:redcloak: ... Um, ok. Hello, sir. How are you today? This is lovely weather.
:xykon: Not me, you moron!

--------------------

:haley: "The Order of the Stick" as fearlessly led by Roy's pants.

--------------------

:belkar: The horse first. You? A close second.
:vaarsuvius: I rest easy knowing that your revenge requires you to first outsmart someone's mount.

[Fluff]

(We don't know if this has been posted or not (also, Fluff is still unconscious from the junk thread) but...

{Insert the entire transcript from #418 here])

[yoshi927]

:belkar: Tell me, is being a complete and utter moron a prerequisite for the class, or a side-effect of taking a level?
Gortok: Let Gortok answer your question with a question.

Who will be the moron when Gortok's white-hot anger crushes your little body into a mangled bloody pulp while Gortok sings a jaunty tune to accompany your unanswered cries for mercy?
:belkar: I'M HOME!!

[Capt'n Ironbrow]

:xykon: "hey stupid hobgoblins, your grand poobah needs a cleric."

"I could allready smell the incense of my coronation as world emperor, which is really amazing 'cause I got no sense of smell."

Xykon: "Oh dude I killed the ground, the ground is calling- Catchy tune"

[Emperor Ing]

Me: Skrew 'Smite Evil'! Smiting evil is for paladin newbs. I bump uglies!

:thog: My ice Cream friends! Thog stop bloodthirsty rampage for you!

:elan: Woo! Im invisible!

[kea]

:roy: Oh. Oh, no.

:roy: I wouldn't touch your skinny uptight ass with a standard-issue 10-ft. pole, you overbearing self-righteous bitch.

250 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0250.html)

[Gnome King]

The last six panels of 357.

[Kurald Galain]

It's not like they're gonna get invaded before they can repair it, you know.

[ChopSticks28]

:roy: What the hell is wrong with you?!
:belkar: Me? Nothing. I'm just seething with a barely restrained fury, that's all.

(Actually, it's a lot funnier when seeing Belkar's face in that comic. But still...)

[DoomITP]

off topic: holy cow one of me first threads almost has 100 posts sweet!


on topic: thors prayer servic: you have silected colin tumor

[Tolkien_Freak]

thors prayer servic: you have silected colin tumor

OFF:Who's Colin, and why does he have a tumor? :smalltongue:

ON:


Explosive RunesTM
brand
Coffee
"Good to the last boom!"

[DoomITP]

:vaarsuvius: i beleve we are truly screwed
:roy: no kidding

[Ithekro]

(Just to keep things in one neat package)

:belkar: "There are two jobs available for you: Providing the fire, or providing the side dish."
:roach: "Do you need it hotter? Because I can do hotter."

I think this is the first time anyone has actually responded to the roaches.

[North]

:mitd: Aww, man! I lost twice. I suck.

Said again for the hilarity

[donkyhotay]

"I think I just failed a spot check"

[Oberon]

"we're, like, right here!"

"Wait. I think I just failed a listen check."

[Pootle]

Ok, its been posted a couple of times but -

:xykon: I think I just had an evilgasm.

And this one because it all started here -

:vaarsuvius: I believe we are being converted to the new 3.5 edition.
:belkar: YES, I've been doing this ranger crap for 3 years now, its about time for an upgrade. C'mon, C'mon, Daddy needs some new skill points.
:roy: Ooooo... Weapon shrinkage.
:haley: TeeHee it's so tiny!
:belkar: :smallfurious: DAMN IT! DAMN IT!
Ping :elan: Ooh! Skill points!

---------------
Pootle

[yoshi927]

:roy: Oh, I'm sorry. Is NOW a good time for batterring things into submission? I just want to be clear on the rules here, since I'm just a big dumb fighter.

[Surfing HalfOrc]

The LONG disclaimer at the entrance to the valley of the Oracle.

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0324.html

Especially the final panel:

Floating Magic Mouth: ... Erections lasting longer than four hours...
:roy: OK, we're done here.

[Klerik]

:mitd: I know! Murky and Lurky must have stolen her colors!
:redcloak: For the last time those characters only exist in Rainbow Brite cartoons!
:mitd: ...and in my heart

---------------------------------------------
:sabine: Heck, I had sex four times while I was away.
:nale: You-you were only gone for three hours!
:sabine: Yeah, well, I had errands to run, too.

---------------------------------------------
:haley: Wait so you've been a woman for all of five minutes and you already have some guys room number? Slut.
:roy: Haley, I swear, shut the hell up with the cracks for one minute.
:haley: Wow, watch out V, It must be Roy's time of the month already.
:roy: ONE! MINUTE!

[Ertier]

My favorites are:
:roach: Frankly, your no Rachel Ray either.
----------
:roy: If I can't see it, it wont kill my brain...
----------
:belkar: Somebody look up the AC on the beast w/2 backs. Ohhhhh yessss...
----------
:roy: You can't tell me you'de be so high-strung if you were recieving Treasure Type O regulary.
:roy: Although which paladin they'd have to draft into that duty....
:miko: STOP TALKING!!!! *SMACK*

[Dalan Graycloak]

I tend to relate most to Roy :roy: because I nearly always play Lawful Good Paladins, but I have to say that I have a special dark place in my heart for Belkar. :belkar:

My favorite quotes: Probably all of Comic #435 "Amoral Dilema"
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0435.html

Especially "The angel... doesn't work here anymore . . ."

And at a different time:

[yoshi927]

:belkar: What would help is a distraction. Let's tip over this torch and set a tent on fire.
:haley: NO! We're trying to sneak Elan out without anyone noticing. V, are you still invisible?
:vaarsuvius: Can you see me?
:haley: No.
:vaarsuvius: Well, I guess that answers your question.
:haley: Okay, walk in front of those guards over there and see if they notice you at all.
:belkar: What we REALLY need is a distraction. Let's set a tent on fire.
:haley: No, Belkar, we are NOT setting a tent on fire.
:vaarsuvius: They seem to be incapable of discerning my invisible form.
:haley: Perfect. Then, we'll-
:belkar: ... Screw it. (sets tent on fire)

[Neek]

It's probably been said before in this thread, but #408 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0408.html).

:roy: "On the other hand, maybe all of this could have been avoided if you had just managed to get laid once in a while. You can't even tell me you'd be this tightly wound if you were receiving Treasure Type O regularly."

[Edit] Yes, it was quoted earlier. Eyes, I have them.

[wojonatior]

i dont think anyone said it yet but....

:elan:whooooooooooooooo im invisible
:roy:how i wish it were true

[Novacat]

:belkar: Run, my pretty little chuncks of XP, run!! "Surrender." Ha! How do they come up with this stuff?

[fangthane]

The best quote in all the OotS is named Francesco.

I didn't think much at all of Turk or Ralph.

What, you wanted to know which quote it was, as opposed to what I named it? :smallbiggrin:

I still say the best is Trigak's "Wait, what?" in the wake of V casting Evan's Spiked Tentacles... Never have two words caused me to laugh so uproariously at work. Well, other than perhaps "Apple quality." :smallamused:

[Duric]

Many good ones have been posted
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0327.html

Truth guard: Oh gods! She shoot me! You cracy bitch. I can't belive you shoot me.

Lying Guard: She absolutely did not shoot you, and I completly expected it!


Lying Guard: Wow you didn't screw that up

Truth guard: Shut up and help me

Lying Guard: Don't bite me

[Rufio]

*Points to signature*

[DoomITP]

:roy: In paradise can I get a picture of that exact pose? no wait a 40 foot marble statue?

[Morgan Wick]

Why did you just resurrect this six-month-old thread?