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RogueartFX
2016-09-01, 10:01 PM
I just found a document that I wrote way back when. It was what a character of mine was going to say to another player character because the kept casting calming aura, which is an area of efect spell that was aimed at enemies, but my character sucked at will saves. So I felt like my character, and by extension, me, wasn't getting to play the way my character would. My character was a fighter and kept getting sidelined by calming aura... When I read it to the other player, it got tense for a minute.

-Illyana-
You have imposed your will and faith upon me for the last time. You have no authority over me. Although I am sure that you have the best of intentions, most of you young humans do, I will not let you dominate me in any way.
Your religion is yours, I will not adopt it as my own. You believe in the salvation of all sentient beings, I believe that the ultimate salvation of one’s being is that of a glorious death. That is what I seek, an opponent that will deliver me an end that befits a true warrior.
As for the gem, you will find it back with the others in Conrad’s possession. Let it represent the freedoms that you have taken from me in the past and let it be a symbol of the last time that you impose yourself on me. If you want me to respect your beliefs, you will have to respect mine. I would prefer if you would not try to influence my mind anymore and I will not be used as an implement to spread your religion.
Beyond that, I admire your spirit, but misunderstand your methods. The path that this party has embarked on could lead to the glorious death that I seek. I would like you to witness my glorious death so that you can better understand the strength of my beliefs.

JAL_1138
2016-09-02, 12:54 PM
I can see how it would be massively, massively frustrating. It's uncool of another player to keep spamming friendly-fire spells, and another player taking control of my character is something that particularly bugs me.

I prefer to solve these kind of disputes out of character. To talk to the player and just say what you've said here:

but my character sucked at will saves. So I felt like my character, and by extension, me, wasn't getting to play the way my character would. My character was a fighter and kept getting sidelined by calming aura...


And do so as soon as it becomes a problem, rather than waiting (nothing changes without an action). There are some things that are better to hash out in-character, but this may (or may not) have its roots in a deeper problem of playstyle differences or in that player's feeling like their character's opinions matter more than the group, or just not realizing the effect their actions are having. Hashing it out OOC could be as simple as "Hey, dude, not cool. My will save sucks and you keep hitting my warrior-type character with mind-altering magic, it's kinda keeping me from playing him how I want," to which the other player responds "Oh, my bad, I didn't know that was bothering you like that, I'll cut it out," and the whole situation is resolved in 30 seconds with no hard feelings. It might not be that simple, of course, but it's usually better than letting it build to a head and having an in-game argument with harshly-worded arguments.

It's absolutely possible to have both generally-nonviolent and bloodthirsty characters in the same group and make it work, though. "They Fight Crime!" and so forth.
I've played that sort of character who prefers to handle things nonviolently, a silver-tongued half-elf bard with a penchant for diplomacy and chicanery...in a group with a half-orc barbarian who talked like Tarzan and was the proverbial man with a hammer to whom all problems appeared to be nails. We were both technically Good-aligned but on the shadiest end of that spectrum possible, so it was fairly easy to hit a compromise--if the conflict was due to a misunderstanding (e.g., angry mob of villagers, or a person who could be an ally if we persuade them we're not to blame for whatever it is they're upset about, or something like that) then I'd try and weasel us out of it, but if the opponents were "acceptable targets" (bandits, monsters, etc) or if the green slime hit the proverbial spinning-blade trap with my attempts to defuse conflict, it was on like Donkey Kong and I'd commence to buffin' an' debuffin' whilst he commenced to smashin'.