Pronounceable
2016-10-31, 04:44 PM
Outer planes are supposed to be idealized universes of alignments, where laws of physics are mere guidelines for alignments to manifest themselves and populated by beings of solidified alignment with alien mindsets wholly dedicated to their ideals. They should be awesome but they’re not because of acute and chronic lamery and unimagination on part of old TSR writers. Also alignment is a bad thing in general, just look at any alignment discussion anywhere ever for proof.
Let’s imagine for a second that alignment is a useful tool for abstracted gameplay and not a goddamn blackhole of idiocy in general. Planes of planescape still suck balls. There’s absolutely no difference between almost all the upper planes, every single one is the idyllic land of pastoral bliss like your great great grandpa lived in combined with disney forests that city dwelling romantic muppets think nature is actually like. Celestia and Bytopia are the only ones that have a slight identity because the romanticized pastoral bliss is laid on one astronomical mountain and one astronomical mirror instead of a sheet of paper. Whereas if all lower planes were just regions of one big plane of evil nobody would ever notice, every single other lower planes might as well be just more layers of the Abyss.
This is bull**** and is the reason why we’re here in this thread. Fixing alignment isn’t gonna be happening anytime soon but fixing outer planes just might happen. For this exercise, we’ll assume trashing it all like 4E did isn’t the best solution (even if it is). We’re gonna find ways to fix the planes of Planescape so each one is going to be distinct with an actual identity that at least somewhat corresponds to its alignment. We’ll do fixing instead of trashing because Planescape is cool and we like Planescape.
Therefore, I want y’all to shoot me with ideas to make the planes great again. Ok, maybe not again as planes have never ever been that great. Though I’m sure you all understand perfectly why having every damn upper plane being the same damn thing is dumb and that only one of them (namely Beastlands) should be a disney forest. Also ideas that make the lower planes things that can’t simply be another layer of the Abyss are needed because even Baator is just 9 floors of generic hellscape.
If you don’t know regular planes of Planescape, wikipedia does. So does a bunch of other places. Anyone has cool ideas to make them not identical to others (creature X lives in plane Y is dumb and doesn’t count, critters aren’t planes despite what TSR claimed), chime in.
Here’s me starting with Arborea, the plane of chaotic good. I’m picking a general theme and making up special yet edition independant rules so it has a unique feel and will presumably be distinct from all the others. I know the name has connotations of nature and whatnot but screw that (I don’t want to change its name because of tradition, even tho I really should name this place Arcadia). I’ll also try to come up with at least 2 gameable things about the plane, preferably name stolen from some official Planescape source.
Arborea
Chaotic Good
The Plane of Friendship, Comfort and Creativity
Arborea is the heaven of artists. It’s an infinite space full of nothing yet anybody can create almost everything they desire. Every sentient being inside Arborea gains the ability to create any nonliving matter out of nothing with a simple thought, an ability that’s usually only reserved for powerful deities. The result is countless tiny worlds floating in the space, tailored to the tastes of the beings who created them (less Limbo, more Little Prince). Anything can be created in Arborea just by imagining it, from a simple ham sandwitch to palaces of marble and gold, from magic potions of curing all ailments to artifacts granting invincibility to the ravages of time. The essential requirements of sustenance are comfortably bypassed with a second’s thought and the meaninglessness of material wealth is magnified in its abundance, leaving those with an artistic bent unburdened by the necessities of living, with all the time in multiverse to perfect their skills and produce the great works they’ve always wanted to. Nothing created by imagination in Arborea can be taken out of it, everything immediately disappears if taken through a portal or another planar pathway but otherwise they stay permanently even if their creator leaves Arborea, untouched by age or wear. This requires interplanar trade to happen and there’s a lot of it for unimaginary materials from outside so Arborean artists can craft things that can be enjoyed by other peoples of the planes (usually paid with information, great performances of arts or instruction on crafts, for anything material from Arborea cannot be taken outside). Some of the finest works of art and greatest masters of crafts in the multiverse originate from Arborea, where the native eladrin have had millenia to perfect their vocations just for the joy of it and might spend just as long on an individual piece of work.
The only thing Arborea doesn’t let you create is company, you’re gonna have to get it the old fashioned way (which is the point). And since nobody has any needs you can force or bribe them with, you’re gonna have to be personable, pleasant, charming or entertaining if you want other people to hang out with you. Arborea wants you to be nice and friendly, so it nudges you to become that by removing anything that might prevent you. Of course, it’s entirely possible to be a recluse who avoids contact with everyone else, but what are you gonna do with your slice of infinity? Even the most curmudgeonly or antisocial guy starts to get bored after a few decades of absolute comfort in solitude.
Arborea isn’t full of just peaceful hippies and joyful artists either. It’s the perfect location for R&R for the soldiers of Good who ceaselessly fight against the Evils of lower planes, so there’s plenty of encampments of warriors from Celestia or Arcadia on leave, where they can enjoy the sorts of things that could get frowned upon in their much stricter home planes but are par for the course in CGland. These militant celestials are usually pretty quick to respond to any disturbance near their facilities. However native eladrin of Arborea don’t need their protection, as they have plenty among their numbers dedicated to arts of warfare and combat (who’re just as skilled at their chosen professions as their artists), nor do they appreciate the “order” archons and devas are trying to bring where it’s not wanted. This friction rarely boils into actual conflict (as the most aggressive and hotheaded of celestials usually hang out in Asgard instead) but it’s known to happen.
Despite the relaxed nature of its inhabitants, Arborea is well protected. Not only are the warrior eladrin some of the best fighters in the multiverse, any inhabitant of Arborea is able to create formidable defenses in seconds, from armies of animated objects to most powerful of weapons. Moreover Arborea seems to have a mind of its own during crises, as the things created by invaders or evildoers disappear and they lose the creation ability Arborea grants to all sentients within it. This doesn’t happen for lone individuals or small groups with evil intent, but it reliably prevents any large scale attack from outside ever being successful.
Overall, Arborea is a great place to exist in. It can get rather boring if you can’t get along with predominantly CG inhabitants, but there’s no other place where you can be as lazy while living nearly as comfortable.
Gameable1: The Great WheelThe biggest casino of the planes is located here, which seems a strange place for it due to the complete meaninglessness of wealth in Arborea at first. However it quickly becomes apparent that gambling here is mostly for show and it’s simply a place for people who have a love of games of chance to socialize and bond. It’s loud and garish and full of revellers and chronic gamblers. The city is full of servants of the goddess of good luck, who considers the massive casino city to be her divine domain. Created by Tymora herself long ago, the massive circular city with its colorfully painted streets and too bright magical lights looks much like a wheel of fortune from above. Squares and streets are full of beings gambling with cards, coins, dice or other doodads, and others who watch those games and wager on their outcomes. Buildings house more complicated engines of gambling, from simple roulette wheels to strange coin powered wager machines, usually operated by servants of Tymora. All creatures are welcome in the Great Wheel so long as they’ve come to play, even fiendish creatures or undead are allowed if they behave themselves.
The creative power Arborea grants to all sentients is blocked by Tymora’s divine will inside the city, with the notable exception of money. The fickle goddess gets a strange joy out of her servants ripping off visitors with ridiculous prices for anything and everything, while letting all of her visitors create infinite money at will. Nobody understands the point of this, though Tymorans offer various explanations and they go along with it, charging thousands of coins for the most basic of amenities (that they’re allowed to create for free). Once every day, Tymora’s servants pile up all the money they got from the visitors in the giant depression in the middle of the Wheel (this is usually measurable with metric tons) and perform a ceremony of sacrifice. Millions of coins melt down and become a pool of gold, then evaporate, followed quickly by a warm rain of gold. The daily ritual is called Undone Purse Strings.
One of the most important and famous properties of the Great Wheel is its defenses against cheating, Tymora’s power makes certain no being can cheat in any game played in her divine realm. Any being who tries to cheat is immediately banished outside, leaving everything they have behind (including clothing). Cheaters are forbidden from entry for a long period of time and their belongings are all forfeit. Other than banishing cheaters, Tymora doesn’t interfere with the visitors and her servants are not allowed to gamble themselves.
Of course, it’s not all fun and games in the Great Wheel. Or rather it’s all fun and games in the Great Wheel (because Tymora), but things might turn ugly outside. All manner of creatures come here to gamble and especially sore losers can cause trouble to the ones who beat them once outside her protection. It’s also a place of gambling for real stakes, it’s well known some folks come to play using real wealth from outside Arborea in uncheatable games, especially demons who rarely, if ever, trust other demons to play fair elsewhere. Many a demonic battle has started from the tables of Tymora’s realm and it’s not at all uncommon for unwise gamblers to ruin their lives (because Beshaba does like to visit her twin every once in a while).
Gameable 2: Temple of Perfection Despite its name, Temple of Perfection isn’t a place for gods. It’s a place for science, where the only thing being worshipped is an ideal, the eternal dream of defeating death. The Temple is a massive building that would be called a hospital if hospitals were ever that big, with hundreds of operation theaters, patient rooms, laboratories, libraries, foundries, mortuaries, storage rooms and workshops. The surgeons and wizards and surgeon-wizards of Perfection are researching and experimenting to perfect the flawed bodies of mortals, chasing endless life through magical and medical procedures. Becoming a horrific decomposing monster inimical to all life is clearly not life, so all those liches and vampires are clearly doing it wrong. Neither is this becoming an outsider after death method, with the key words “after death” in it. Trying to replace essential body functions with magic is also a folly, as ongoing magical effects are far too easy to disrupt. No, those are all wrong. Perfectionists will do it right. They will enhance their mortal bodies, replace bits and pieces with better working ones (that don’t depend on magic to continue functioning), invent ways of eliminating all dangers to mortal bodies and attain endless, real life.
Surgeon-wizards of Perfection have developed many augmentations usable on many mortal races. They have created artifical hearts that don’t get attacks, nerves that can heal and treatments that strengthen muscles and bones, thanks to the creative qualities of Arborea allowing them to perform medical and industrial feats literally impossible anywhere else. Not that they’re anywhere near beating death, there’s still thousands of ways for a mortal body to die, the Perfectionists haven’t beaten death but they certainly gave it a bloody nose. The only slight problem is that they’re stuck in Arborea, as trying to leave would leave them with a severe lack of hearts, nervous systems and other bits. Also the processes required to craft many of the items required for Perfectionist treatments aren’t possible outside of Arborea, so there’s no chance of replacing such body parts with unimagined copies made outside.
The few beings who know much about Perfectionists point out that living in Arborea is already endless life. And since Perfectionists don’t seem like they’ll be able to leave anytime soon, there isn’t much of a point to their endeavors. But Arborea is the plane of the obsessive artists and craftsmen, no reason why it can’t be the plane of obsessive scientists too. Besides, if Arborea didn’t like what they were doing, it would’ve stopped them.
For most others, Perfectionists are sick sickos who pervert the power of Arborea with endlessly creating dead bodies to desecrate in a mad quest for knowledge. But as a result of their depravity, they know a whole lot about these things they call biology and medicine and information is the true wealth in Arborea. They’ve also created some few medicines that can be created and used outside, saving a small but noticable number of mortal lives. Eladrin would just love to kick the Perfectionists out but that’d be equal to executing them, so they grudgingly let them be. There’s also all manner of beings out in the planes who would love to get their appendages on Perfectionist knowledge for the endless ways it can be weaponized, so eladrin figure it’s better to keep Perfectionists where they can at least protect the information. Perfectionists themselves have a lust for information too and are known to employ all sorts of beings to experiment upon or bring them information they can’t get themselves. Temple of Perfection is a busy place with many opportunities for profit for the brave and the unsqueamish.
Anyone wants to take a shot at another plane? Cos I don't really have ideas for all 16 of them (there's no Outlands, **** Outlands, Outlands is dumb). Even if you're not doing a full writeup, post your ideas. Locations within Arborea, or your own concepts for other planes are fine. So long as you're not posting what can be summed as disney forest (that's not Beastlands), you're good. In fact, you can post a better Arborea if you got it. I need more good ideas and am not averse to moving this concept to another plane.
Let’s imagine for a second that alignment is a useful tool for abstracted gameplay and not a goddamn blackhole of idiocy in general. Planes of planescape still suck balls. There’s absolutely no difference between almost all the upper planes, every single one is the idyllic land of pastoral bliss like your great great grandpa lived in combined with disney forests that city dwelling romantic muppets think nature is actually like. Celestia and Bytopia are the only ones that have a slight identity because the romanticized pastoral bliss is laid on one astronomical mountain and one astronomical mirror instead of a sheet of paper. Whereas if all lower planes were just regions of one big plane of evil nobody would ever notice, every single other lower planes might as well be just more layers of the Abyss.
This is bull**** and is the reason why we’re here in this thread. Fixing alignment isn’t gonna be happening anytime soon but fixing outer planes just might happen. For this exercise, we’ll assume trashing it all like 4E did isn’t the best solution (even if it is). We’re gonna find ways to fix the planes of Planescape so each one is going to be distinct with an actual identity that at least somewhat corresponds to its alignment. We’ll do fixing instead of trashing because Planescape is cool and we like Planescape.
Therefore, I want y’all to shoot me with ideas to make the planes great again. Ok, maybe not again as planes have never ever been that great. Though I’m sure you all understand perfectly why having every damn upper plane being the same damn thing is dumb and that only one of them (namely Beastlands) should be a disney forest. Also ideas that make the lower planes things that can’t simply be another layer of the Abyss are needed because even Baator is just 9 floors of generic hellscape.
If you don’t know regular planes of Planescape, wikipedia does. So does a bunch of other places. Anyone has cool ideas to make them not identical to others (creature X lives in plane Y is dumb and doesn’t count, critters aren’t planes despite what TSR claimed), chime in.
Here’s me starting with Arborea, the plane of chaotic good. I’m picking a general theme and making up special yet edition independant rules so it has a unique feel and will presumably be distinct from all the others. I know the name has connotations of nature and whatnot but screw that (I don’t want to change its name because of tradition, even tho I really should name this place Arcadia). I’ll also try to come up with at least 2 gameable things about the plane, preferably name stolen from some official Planescape source.
Arborea
Chaotic Good
The Plane of Friendship, Comfort and Creativity
Arborea is the heaven of artists. It’s an infinite space full of nothing yet anybody can create almost everything they desire. Every sentient being inside Arborea gains the ability to create any nonliving matter out of nothing with a simple thought, an ability that’s usually only reserved for powerful deities. The result is countless tiny worlds floating in the space, tailored to the tastes of the beings who created them (less Limbo, more Little Prince). Anything can be created in Arborea just by imagining it, from a simple ham sandwitch to palaces of marble and gold, from magic potions of curing all ailments to artifacts granting invincibility to the ravages of time. The essential requirements of sustenance are comfortably bypassed with a second’s thought and the meaninglessness of material wealth is magnified in its abundance, leaving those with an artistic bent unburdened by the necessities of living, with all the time in multiverse to perfect their skills and produce the great works they’ve always wanted to. Nothing created by imagination in Arborea can be taken out of it, everything immediately disappears if taken through a portal or another planar pathway but otherwise they stay permanently even if their creator leaves Arborea, untouched by age or wear. This requires interplanar trade to happen and there’s a lot of it for unimaginary materials from outside so Arborean artists can craft things that can be enjoyed by other peoples of the planes (usually paid with information, great performances of arts or instruction on crafts, for anything material from Arborea cannot be taken outside). Some of the finest works of art and greatest masters of crafts in the multiverse originate from Arborea, where the native eladrin have had millenia to perfect their vocations just for the joy of it and might spend just as long on an individual piece of work.
The only thing Arborea doesn’t let you create is company, you’re gonna have to get it the old fashioned way (which is the point). And since nobody has any needs you can force or bribe them with, you’re gonna have to be personable, pleasant, charming or entertaining if you want other people to hang out with you. Arborea wants you to be nice and friendly, so it nudges you to become that by removing anything that might prevent you. Of course, it’s entirely possible to be a recluse who avoids contact with everyone else, but what are you gonna do with your slice of infinity? Even the most curmudgeonly or antisocial guy starts to get bored after a few decades of absolute comfort in solitude.
Arborea isn’t full of just peaceful hippies and joyful artists either. It’s the perfect location for R&R for the soldiers of Good who ceaselessly fight against the Evils of lower planes, so there’s plenty of encampments of warriors from Celestia or Arcadia on leave, where they can enjoy the sorts of things that could get frowned upon in their much stricter home planes but are par for the course in CGland. These militant celestials are usually pretty quick to respond to any disturbance near their facilities. However native eladrin of Arborea don’t need their protection, as they have plenty among their numbers dedicated to arts of warfare and combat (who’re just as skilled at their chosen professions as their artists), nor do they appreciate the “order” archons and devas are trying to bring where it’s not wanted. This friction rarely boils into actual conflict (as the most aggressive and hotheaded of celestials usually hang out in Asgard instead) but it’s known to happen.
Despite the relaxed nature of its inhabitants, Arborea is well protected. Not only are the warrior eladrin some of the best fighters in the multiverse, any inhabitant of Arborea is able to create formidable defenses in seconds, from armies of animated objects to most powerful of weapons. Moreover Arborea seems to have a mind of its own during crises, as the things created by invaders or evildoers disappear and they lose the creation ability Arborea grants to all sentients within it. This doesn’t happen for lone individuals or small groups with evil intent, but it reliably prevents any large scale attack from outside ever being successful.
Overall, Arborea is a great place to exist in. It can get rather boring if you can’t get along with predominantly CG inhabitants, but there’s no other place where you can be as lazy while living nearly as comfortable.
Gameable1: The Great WheelThe biggest casino of the planes is located here, which seems a strange place for it due to the complete meaninglessness of wealth in Arborea at first. However it quickly becomes apparent that gambling here is mostly for show and it’s simply a place for people who have a love of games of chance to socialize and bond. It’s loud and garish and full of revellers and chronic gamblers. The city is full of servants of the goddess of good luck, who considers the massive casino city to be her divine domain. Created by Tymora herself long ago, the massive circular city with its colorfully painted streets and too bright magical lights looks much like a wheel of fortune from above. Squares and streets are full of beings gambling with cards, coins, dice or other doodads, and others who watch those games and wager on their outcomes. Buildings house more complicated engines of gambling, from simple roulette wheels to strange coin powered wager machines, usually operated by servants of Tymora. All creatures are welcome in the Great Wheel so long as they’ve come to play, even fiendish creatures or undead are allowed if they behave themselves.
The creative power Arborea grants to all sentients is blocked by Tymora’s divine will inside the city, with the notable exception of money. The fickle goddess gets a strange joy out of her servants ripping off visitors with ridiculous prices for anything and everything, while letting all of her visitors create infinite money at will. Nobody understands the point of this, though Tymorans offer various explanations and they go along with it, charging thousands of coins for the most basic of amenities (that they’re allowed to create for free). Once every day, Tymora’s servants pile up all the money they got from the visitors in the giant depression in the middle of the Wheel (this is usually measurable with metric tons) and perform a ceremony of sacrifice. Millions of coins melt down and become a pool of gold, then evaporate, followed quickly by a warm rain of gold. The daily ritual is called Undone Purse Strings.
One of the most important and famous properties of the Great Wheel is its defenses against cheating, Tymora’s power makes certain no being can cheat in any game played in her divine realm. Any being who tries to cheat is immediately banished outside, leaving everything they have behind (including clothing). Cheaters are forbidden from entry for a long period of time and their belongings are all forfeit. Other than banishing cheaters, Tymora doesn’t interfere with the visitors and her servants are not allowed to gamble themselves.
Of course, it’s not all fun and games in the Great Wheel. Or rather it’s all fun and games in the Great Wheel (because Tymora), but things might turn ugly outside. All manner of creatures come here to gamble and especially sore losers can cause trouble to the ones who beat them once outside her protection. It’s also a place of gambling for real stakes, it’s well known some folks come to play using real wealth from outside Arborea in uncheatable games, especially demons who rarely, if ever, trust other demons to play fair elsewhere. Many a demonic battle has started from the tables of Tymora’s realm and it’s not at all uncommon for unwise gamblers to ruin their lives (because Beshaba does like to visit her twin every once in a while).
Gameable 2: Temple of Perfection Despite its name, Temple of Perfection isn’t a place for gods. It’s a place for science, where the only thing being worshipped is an ideal, the eternal dream of defeating death. The Temple is a massive building that would be called a hospital if hospitals were ever that big, with hundreds of operation theaters, patient rooms, laboratories, libraries, foundries, mortuaries, storage rooms and workshops. The surgeons and wizards and surgeon-wizards of Perfection are researching and experimenting to perfect the flawed bodies of mortals, chasing endless life through magical and medical procedures. Becoming a horrific decomposing monster inimical to all life is clearly not life, so all those liches and vampires are clearly doing it wrong. Neither is this becoming an outsider after death method, with the key words “after death” in it. Trying to replace essential body functions with magic is also a folly, as ongoing magical effects are far too easy to disrupt. No, those are all wrong. Perfectionists will do it right. They will enhance their mortal bodies, replace bits and pieces with better working ones (that don’t depend on magic to continue functioning), invent ways of eliminating all dangers to mortal bodies and attain endless, real life.
Surgeon-wizards of Perfection have developed many augmentations usable on many mortal races. They have created artifical hearts that don’t get attacks, nerves that can heal and treatments that strengthen muscles and bones, thanks to the creative qualities of Arborea allowing them to perform medical and industrial feats literally impossible anywhere else. Not that they’re anywhere near beating death, there’s still thousands of ways for a mortal body to die, the Perfectionists haven’t beaten death but they certainly gave it a bloody nose. The only slight problem is that they’re stuck in Arborea, as trying to leave would leave them with a severe lack of hearts, nervous systems and other bits. Also the processes required to craft many of the items required for Perfectionist treatments aren’t possible outside of Arborea, so there’s no chance of replacing such body parts with unimagined copies made outside.
The few beings who know much about Perfectionists point out that living in Arborea is already endless life. And since Perfectionists don’t seem like they’ll be able to leave anytime soon, there isn’t much of a point to their endeavors. But Arborea is the plane of the obsessive artists and craftsmen, no reason why it can’t be the plane of obsessive scientists too. Besides, if Arborea didn’t like what they were doing, it would’ve stopped them.
For most others, Perfectionists are sick sickos who pervert the power of Arborea with endlessly creating dead bodies to desecrate in a mad quest for knowledge. But as a result of their depravity, they know a whole lot about these things they call biology and medicine and information is the true wealth in Arborea. They’ve also created some few medicines that can be created and used outside, saving a small but noticable number of mortal lives. Eladrin would just love to kick the Perfectionists out but that’d be equal to executing them, so they grudgingly let them be. There’s also all manner of beings out in the planes who would love to get their appendages on Perfectionist knowledge for the endless ways it can be weaponized, so eladrin figure it’s better to keep Perfectionists where they can at least protect the information. Perfectionists themselves have a lust for information too and are known to employ all sorts of beings to experiment upon or bring them information they can’t get themselves. Temple of Perfection is a busy place with many opportunities for profit for the brave and the unsqueamish.
Anyone wants to take a shot at another plane? Cos I don't really have ideas for all 16 of them (there's no Outlands, **** Outlands, Outlands is dumb). Even if you're not doing a full writeup, post your ideas. Locations within Arborea, or your own concepts for other planes are fine. So long as you're not posting what can be summed as disney forest (that's not Beastlands), you're good. In fact, you can post a better Arborea if you got it. I need more good ideas and am not averse to moving this concept to another plane.