View Full Version : Dragons, Idiots, and Homebrew [5E Campagin Journal]

2016-11-20, 01:52 PM
This is a tale of a group of intermediate size, a Dungeon Master weirder and more insane than most of his players, and almost entirely made of people who have no idea what they're doing... because this is their first time playing Dungeons and Dragons.

Including me.

The DM

The DM; Me, the potential pretentious and aliteral moron placed in charge of the next several sessions and campaigns between a group of people who have met each other only once or twice before, and who’s only experience DM’ing comes from online RP’s, the rulebook, and the internet in general.
The Silver Dragon; The only person in the group who has ever played before in person, and numerous times at that. Will absolutely try to derail the plot on a Henderson scale or play a thief. Has a reputation for all things implied by being either the former or the later, but still a generally fun player.
The Dragon Elf; One of the first time players, Aerie is quiet. He is also a munchkin, and total wildcard. When imagining what he is like, imagine what I am like on this forum. This is him when he jokes around or decides to speak up.
Sin the Tiefling; A first time player who has absolutely no idea what he is going to do and couldn’t figure out the rules, and is generally along for the ride and the loot. And the RP. Has the potential to either be an amazing player or horrifyingly effective character
Mongol the Dwarve; A Dwarven Ranger, the Silver Dragons friend, and the only other person with actual Tabetop Gaming experience; only with Pathfinder rather than DnD. I know literally nothing about him.

The World itself is one of my own creations, spurned up and existing purely so I can make things up as needed due to it's lack of actually defined locations. Not to say that it doesnt have them; It's just that asides from many different plot points and kingdom borders and capitals, it's blank.

While the World is currently nameless, it's only land mass is a single super-massive continent named it Alteria, and a small chain of islands to the north, one of which is a Volcano which once housed an ancient Greco-Roman empire. Over two-thirds of Alteria is a wind swept desert, separating the Humans kingdoms and lands from the Elves and Dwarves in the North. There is, of course, an abundance of normally unused races and monsters that inhabit the desert:smallbiggrin:.
Alteria has three different "Pantheons.", possessing 7 gods in total. Three Good Gods for each alignment, Three Neutral Gods for each Neutral alignment, and a single Evil Goddess. Each Race has a different name for the Good and Neutral gods, as well as appearance, yet they are the same; the Evil Goddess is an outlier yet again in that she possesses the same appearance to all races, and the same name; Sin. Mostly because she's a Demon who killed the 3 evil Gods thousands of years ago.
For our first little campaign set in this world, we're.... er.... using the Lost Mine of Phandelver from the Beginner's Set. Mostly due to a lack of confidence in my own skills to weave an original session or campaign without much experience DM'ing yet, I've simply changed around a few names and added plot hooks.

Now, a few things to keep in mind while I finish up records of the first session. As one could guess by the title, there is going to be Homebrew classes and races involved in this, mostly plucked off of the internet and then approved of by myself. The second is that we've had two sessions so far, with the third scheduled late novemeber or early december. The final thing is that when writing the journals themselves, I'll keep my status as DM from interfering with their amusement too much, or from creating an enjoyable narrative.


2016-11-20, 03:03 PM
First Session, Go!

For the first session, there were only two players; The Dragon Elf, and Sin the Tiefling. The Dragon Elf was, obviously, a Homebrew race found online; I had looked it over, approved it, and then helped him make his character sheet before sending him on his merry way as a Sorcerer with Draconic Ancestry. He could breath Lightning once a day, and was very transparently the offspring of a Blue Dragon – Silvery Veins, scales, pale blue skin… when all was said and done, he was maybe the most suspicious person you could get. He was also a Chaotic Good Hermit.

Sin the Tiefling, on the other hand, is just a straight up Chaotic Evil Warlock. Not a Conquer the World evil, just the kind of evil where she could never be called a good person. She was a Mercenary who would do anything for whoever offered her the most money, and would lie, cheat, steal, and loot anything and everything she could claim as her own. This wasn’t what made her interesting, though; this was just her player being a stereotypical murderhobo.

She was also Bat**** Insane, and claimed to be the in-setting goddess of the same name, believing all her Warlock powers to come from herself rather than some Archedevil she had sold her soul to. I am the one ENTIRELY responsible for creating the character after being given input by the player, resulting in Sin being a Min Maxed monster, with a tragic backstory to explain why she’s a Warlock and why she’s insane.

A peaceful trail through a sparsely-packed forest.

Two Oxen quietly pulling along a wagon.

….And the sound of relentless bickering from two adventurers who would rather have nothing to do with each other.

The Elf and Sin, as I’ll refer to them from now on, had never met before in character; instead, they were Temporary Coworkers, hired by a Dwarf named Gundren to guard and transport supplies to a small town named Phandelver, with promises of future employment opportunities and greater rewards after they arrived. Sin had been hired out of Greed, Boredom, and her Reputation of relentless slaughter. The Elf had been hired because he had recently ended his century of solitude within the mountains, and Gundren was an old friend who refused to let him go without payment for doing him this favor.

Days ago, Gundren had rode ahead of the Caravan with his bodyguard Sildar Hallwinter, an ex-adventurer, saying he intended to reach town ahead of time and meet with his brothers. This left two people who didn’t enjoy each others company and believed the other to be a bit loopy in the head together for the next day and a half.

This would be when the ACTUAL argument between me and Sin's player ended, involving why he was not using his MLP toy as a Miniature ended, and the Party found two horses impaled with arrows ahead of them on the road. Sin moves ahead to investigate, the Elf stays at the front of the Cart, and Sin realizes that the horses are Gundren and Sildar's right as four arrows identical to the ones in the horses fly at her.

Sin, ignoring some of the arrows and taking the rest, draws her weapons; rushing out of the woods come two goblins wielding Scimitars and Sheilds screaming like madmen while another is visible in the trees, bow still out and ready. The Dragon Elf prepares to go help Sin, when the fourth and final goblin taps his shoulder and whacks him in the head with its bow before jumping into the back of the Wagon, where the supplies where located.

Cursing and chasing after the goblin, The Elf proceeds to have some of the most horribly epic luck I’ve ever heard of, rolling three ones in a row. The first is when he swings at the Goblin, who had drawn his sword; and completely misses, instead causing a few sacks of flour to be knocked over and burst open, causing more property damage than the goblin itself. The second two ones are when he tries to cast magic missile at the Goblin, and instead gave the bottom of the cart two brand new wholes.

Elf: " I can blame this all on the Goblins, right?"
DM: "Sure. If it makes you feel better."

The third actually hit the goblin, but did next to nothing. Eventually, however, he succeeded in beating the goblin, knocking it out with his Quarterstaff and tying it up to be interrogated later. He sprints out of the back of the Wagon, shouting.

Elf: “Sin! I’m here to – “

He, covered in his own blood and countless cuts, barely alive, finds Sin looting the burned, pulped, and smashed remains of the other three goblins, looking completely unharmed.

Elf: “Oh.”

Sin: “Yeah.”

Elf: “Oh…”

Sin: “YEAH.”

This is exactly how the entire exchange went.

The fight over, everything of value – up to and including the horses bodies – taken, the duo decide to head back to town and see if Sildar or Gundren managed to survive and make it to town. With the Goblin currently knocked out and tied up in the back, they had nothing better to do.

Night had started to fall when the Goblin stirred and started to scream for mercy, and about how it regretted going into inhuman resources rather than Medical School like his father told him to. His screams turned into whimpers and answers shortly thereafter, though, after sin pinned him against the wall by making an odd X shape with two swords she took off the goblins and shoving them against the goblins neck. Her every turn was spent intimidating the goblin so hard it wet itself several times and told them everything it knew. The tone and pace of the conversation went something like this.

Sin: “Alright, start talking!”


Sin: “Stop going through a mid-life crisis and TALK! Wait, can goblins even have a mid life crisis?”


Sin (OOC): “He’s oddly coherent for a goblin. What’s his INT?”

DM: *Scribbling* “19.”

Sin (OOC): “….What?”

Elf (Returning from Bathroom.): “What’s what now?”

Sin (OOC) : “Nothing, just about to shove the swords of the Goblins dead comrades against his throat and threaten
him to shut up.”

DM: “….Roll Intimidation”

Sin: “20!”

Goblin:” Twenty wh- OH GOD! I’ll talk, I’ll talk!”

Elf: “Every time I think I know how messed up you are....”

Sin: “Rolling to intimidate again, and demanding to know “WHERE DID YOU TAKE THE DWARVE!”


It ultimately ended with them deciding to camp out in the trees for the night, the goblin tied to the trunk of an oak, and to have them lead them to the lair in the morning with the realization that their employer/friend might be alive.
Oh, and that other guy too, the supposed. I unfortunately have over half the session left to type, but need to leave, so it’ll come tomorrow.

2016-11-20, 04:21 PM
Int 19 goblin captive? Murder a wizard and give him the spellbook, mage henchman!