Ow My Balls: Not Just a Idiocracy Reference, Sadly

[hustlertwo]

I got a vasectomy this morning. It was more painful than I expected, though the aftereffects have not been too bad. I mostly just sit here mildly uncomfortable and constantly listen to timers going off that tell me to either place or remove ice packs from my battered genitals. I feel bad for my wife, dealing with a semi-invalid husband as well as our three year old and six month old. But not as bad as I feel for myself, given that no one cut a hole in her scrotum today and cauterized the pipes inside.

So, anyone else go do the snip-ship?

[tomandtish]

My wife had the hysterectomy (reoccurring cyst problem), so no need on my end.

I've heard you can ... hear it happening? True? Please say no. :smallfrown:

[Aedilred]

I don't even want to think about it. You have my sympathies.

[hustlertwo]

My wife had the hysterectomy (reoccurring cyst problem), so no need on my end.

I've heard you can ... hear it happening? True? Please say no. :smallfrown:

True. Local anesthetic only, you do not get put to sleep, and I could still feel pain and pressure despite the needle full of anesthetic they popped in my fellas at the beginning. Doc and nurse kept asking me if I wanted to see the vas deferens. I can honestly say I was not tempted to say yes, and politely asked them not to give me the play by play of what was happening. On the plus side, as painful and unpleasant as the procedure was, and as much as I wish I had the option to not remember any of it, at least it was short. From the moment the nice lady taped my guy to my belly to keep it out of the way (a sharp pain that you do not get an aesthetic for, when they rip that off at the end) to when they finished the (thankfully dissolving, so no appointment to remove) stitches was maybe 12-15 minutes.

And thanks, Aed. I still do not regret doing it, though I might have come close the first time I used the bathroom after.

[danzibr]

While I can't get one for religious reasons, this thread was entertaining.

[Strigon]

While I can't get one for religious reasons, this thread was entertaining.

I don't know about entertaining, but it's seriously made me rethink the idea of getting married.

I mean, I was never super keen on the idea to begin with (not for any particular bias against the thing itself; quite the opposite, in fact! But relationships are hard!), but the realization that my options are either:
Snip-snip, which I simply won't do because I've already had one too many procedures, thank you very much
Find a girl who's okay with maybe being pregnant until chilbearing age is gone, and have many children, but such women are rare, I'd be a terrible father and I'd feel guilty about doing so anyway.
Or be abstinent, which would likely be irritating for my partner, nevermind me.

So, yeah; TL;DR, you're a braver man than me :smalltongue:
Hope you have a speedy recovery!

[Aedilred]

I don't know about entertaining, but it's seriously made me rethink the idea of getting married.

I mean, I was never super keen on the idea to begin with (not for any particular bias against the thing itself; quite the opposite, in fact! But relationships are hard!), but the realization that my options are either:
Snip-snip, which I simply won't do because I've already had one too many procedures, thank you very much
Find a girl who's okay with maybe being pregnant until chilbearing age is gone, and have many children, but such women are rare, I'd be a terrible father and I'd feel guilty about doing so anyway.
Or be abstinent, which would likely be irritating for my partner, nevermind me.

So, yeah; TL;DR, you're a braver man than me :smalltongue:
Hope you have a speedy recovery!

You could always just use regular contraception. It's more hassle, but less permanent and invasive.

[NePb]

I haven't personally, but I have a friend who, after his fifth, decided maybe the wife wasn't doing birth control properly. He got snipped. Only missed one day at work, and was sore for about 5. Good luck.

Also, I've met kids who were born to tube tied mothers, so the vasectomy is more fool proof in my understanding.

[hustlertwo]

I don't know about entertaining, but it's seriously made me rethink the idea of getting married.

I mean, I was never super keen on the idea to begin with (not for any particular bias against the thing itself; quite the opposite, in fact! But relationships are hard!), but the realization that my options are either:
Snip-snip, which I simply won't do because I've already had one too many procedures, thank you very much
Find a girl who's okay with maybe being pregnant until chilbearing age is gone, and have many children, but such women are rare, I'd be a terrible father and I'd feel guilty about doing so anyway.
Or be abstinent, which would likely be irritating for my partner, nevermind me.

So, yeah; TL;DR, you're a braver man than me :smalltongue:
Hope you have a speedy recovery!

Thank you! We have a three year old and seven month old (both girls) and decided more just wasn't desired. Other birth controls are less reliable over the decade and a half or so between my wife's current age and around when she would hit menopause. Each pregnancy was brutal for her (constant sickness and nausea), and neither of these girls were sleepers at a young age. More than that, though, we just could not think of a reason to keep having kids. We already sometimes feel split between the two attention-wise, a third would likely just exacerbate it. Helps financially too, we are a single-worker family and even with eBay as a secondary income and a super-low mortgage there are still two weddings and college looming in the distant future. More of that is not desired. However, I think you should not marry someone if you do not love them enough to potentially have your ballsac puncutured in the name of love. Not literally, but just to know there is nothing you would not do for this person.

And while I wish I could say I was offended at my testicular trauma being a source of entertainment, but I spent too many years watching America's Funniest Home Videos to say that without being a hypocrite.

[2D8HP]

Best wishes on your recovery (and to your family), in light of the change you may wish to change your signature of:

"Posting may be sporadic, having a baby!"

[hustlertwo]

Ha, true enough. It has been thusly changed.

[Knaight]

You could always just use regular contraception. It's more hassle, but less permanent and invasive.

The key is to know what methods do and do not stack, and to use as heavy stacking as possible. Odds of pregnancy can be driven down to incredibly low rates with relatively minimal stacking given proper use, and the definitions of proper use not infrequently boil down to not deciding "eh, lets just not bother this one time".

Although as far as the invasive side goes, it's not exactly open heart surgery.

[Strigon]

You could always just use regular contraception. It's more hassle, but less permanent and invasive.

Yeah, you're not wrong.
Still, I'm of the opinion that it would be unwise for me to risk procreation just for pleasure - even if the risk is very, very low, I'm neurotic and paranoid enough that no amount of contraception would convince me it was safe.


However, I think you should not marry someone if you do not love them enough to potentially have your ballsac puncutured in the name of love.

What a dewey-eyed romantic you are!
If I ever do find a lass, can I use this for a sonnet? I'd quote you, of course.

Seriously, though; I getcha. Still, to my mind, there's a rather significant difference between what I'd do for a girl, and what I'd do to be with that girl. The first is a much broader category than the second.

[hustlertwo]

By all means, I have no problem being your Cyrano. Mostly I was doing this because the alternative for females (getting their 'tubes tied') is more intrusive, has a longer recovery time, and a lower rate of success. I love Michele too much to put her through that just to spare myself some lesser agony.

[Razade]

I'd just like to point out that "never having a baby again". Vasectomies can reverse, vasectomies don't always take even if they appear to, and sperm can still get through despite the snipping. You may have a baby yet.

[hustlertwo]

Rate of failure is something like 1 in 2000 or so. Honestly, if we get pregnant with those odds than I just accept that as God saying we ain't done just yet.

[2D8HP]

Rate of failure is something like 1 in 2000 or so....


So not effective for newlyweds then.

*RIMSHOT*

[ArlEammon]

I will never do anything to my balls for anyone. Not my wife, or anyone. Unless you mean kinky ballbusting.

But a vasectomy? Never.

[tomandtish]

I will never do anything to my balls for anyone. Not my wife, or anyone. Unless you mean kinky ballbusting.

But a vasectomy? Never.

Have to ask. Are you married? Because if my wife had a condition where a future pregnancy would be potentially life threatening, so to avoid she has the hysterectomy or I have the vasectomy, that seems a no-brainer: I get snipped.

In our case she had the surgery because of other health issues she had that my status would have no impact on.

[ArlEammon]

Have to ask. Are you married? Because if my wife had a condition where a future pregnancy would be potentially life threatening, so to avoid she has the hysterectomy or I have the vasectomy, that seems a no-brainer: I get snipped.

In our case she had the surgery because of other health issues she had that my status would have no impact on.

I would consider PMing this so I don't get in violation of terms of service so I can discuss this between two mature adults.

[Talanic]

Got one two years ago.

Three months ago, I found out that it was irrelevant. Due to a hormonal condition, I've never been able to have kids. If we'd had my sperm count checked in advance of the procedure, I might've gotten treatment for my bad T levels a long time ago.

[hustlertwo]

So not effective for newlyweds then.

*RIMSHOT*

Ba dum bum!

However, unlike with other brith control forms, this one doesn't increase in risk the more you have sex (one of its main advantages). The 1 in 2000 just refers to the, ah, cables reconnecting spontaneously over time. They will check my sperm count at 6 and 12 weeks to try and verify sterility in case any of my boys were hiding in the chamber.

[Knaight]

So not effective for newlyweds then.

*RIMSHOT*

The rates are generally measured in terms of annual use, for a lot of reasons. A year is a year for everyone, including newlyweds.