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View Full Version : Player Help Should I leave this group?



StarLightPips
2017-04-09, 02:05 AM
So I'm pretty new to D&D, I've only really been in 1 group (we've played about 7 times each session about 6 hours long) but I've REALLY been enjoying it, so I joined another campain for the fun of it, a pokemon one since I thought that was an interesting idea, the only problem is...

-8 players
-2 of them never stop talking
-no initiative in combat
-Even during RP moments (A player getting a new Pokemon), others will interrupt and the dm cuts to them.
-Doesn't stick to the time set for start the game (I live in a different HEMISPHERE to the rest of them, so starting 3 hours early without prior notice might be easy for them but certantly not for me)


Like I said, I'm pretty new to d&d but I've NEVER left a session feeling actually UNHAPPY or during a session stopped listening and started doing other things. And I'm not sure I can even tell the DM any of this since I'm pretty sure only 2 of us aren't friends of his. To be fair this was our first session but I've never been so upset after a game. I'm not sure I even want to give them the 3 session leeway.

Any advice?

Potato_Priest
2017-04-09, 02:09 AM
If you are having fun, stay.

If you aren't, leave.

Don't bother with a set amount of leeway as long as you think you have the general feel of the group from that first session.

Before you leave, ask the DM if that session you played in was typical for talking/distractedness. If they say that it was pretty standard, leave and you'll never have to talk to them again. You won't have to worry about hurt feelings at all. If they say that it was unusually squirrely that day, give it another go.

Lord Ruby34
2017-04-09, 02:10 AM
D&D is a game. If you're not having fun, don't play. This holds doubly true for an online game where you aren't close friends with everyone, because you don't even get the benefit of socializing. I say get out of there. You should relay your concerns to the DM if you think he has any intention of changing, but if he doesn't, bounce.

Ninjadeadbeard
2017-04-09, 02:18 AM
If you have to ask, then probably yeah. For what it's worth, you never mentioned a reason FOR staying.

Vitruviansquid
2017-04-09, 02:28 AM
Imagine the alternative thing you would be doing instead of playing D&D.

Would that thing be more fun than playing D&D with your group?

If so, leave.

Anonymouswizard
2017-04-09, 05:16 AM
-8 players

No inherently a bad thing, but very difficult, I tend to rule seven as the maximum number I'm willing to except when I GM. This is likely part of what's causing other GMing problems.


-2 of them never stop talking

Well as long as they let you get a word in it's not the end of the world. Annoying according to most of my friends, but as long the game is alright this can be tolerated.


-no initiative in combat[QUOTE]

This is just how some groups run combat. As long as there's something in place to ensure that nobody dominates by taking significantly more actions it works. I have personally used 'round the table initiative' before from both sides of the screen, where we just go from the person sitting at the GM's left to the person sitting at his right.

[QUOTE]-Even during RP moments (A player getting a new Pokemon), others will interrupt and the dm cuts to them.

...

...

...

leave the group. This is just bad manners. I understand from the GM's point of view, running a game can be so difficult that I tend to run actions as soon as a player says them (even if it's another player's scene) as long as it isn't combat. I essentially rely on players not to interrupt during important moments, and try not to when others are GMing (I have problems with it, but I'm getting better! Slowly). It's difficult when something's been happening for the last 20 minutes and you've been unable to do anything, but this sounds like it goes beyond that.


-Doesn't stick to the time set for start the game (I live in a different HEMISPHERE to the rest of them, so starting 3 hours early without prior notice might be easy for them but certantly not for me)

Again, bad manners, although it can be solved. If you stay talk to the GM about this.

My advice is to simply remember this:
'no gaming is better than bad gaming'

Are you having fun, if no then politely leave. Sometimes we just clash with a group, but if you explain why and are polite if they have problems then honestly it's not your problem, you've done all you need to by politely leaving instead of causing a train wreck.

Dappershire
2017-04-09, 05:28 AM
I got your back Pips. Here's what you do.
Play another game with them. Laugh. Joke. Up close and friendly with their characters.
Then, an hour before the session ends, reveal that you've been working for Team Rocket all along, you have stolen their pokeballs while they sleep, and they can personally lick your voltorb.
Mic drop, put on sunglasses, log off.

Jay R
2017-04-09, 08:23 AM
This is what the game will be like. If the sum total of what it will be isn't worth the time to you, then leave the group. If it will not be worth the time to you, keep playing.

That's the obvious part. Now here is the next step, which some people never figure out.

This is what the game will be like. It's different from what you expected, so it should be played differently. How can you use these conditions to have more fun?

For instance, there is no initiative. This means that you can jump in when you thnk best. An enemy is knocked down near you? Don't wait - jump in and say "I hit him while he's prone."

People interrupt during RP moments? OK, how can you use that fact to advantage? Somebody says something outrageous or impressive? You respond instantly if it gives you a set-up. [This is a great time to pick a pocket, or quietly pick up a loose item, or some such.]

But if you are considering leaving, talk to the DM first. That can't possibly hurt if the alternative is to leave. It might help, or it might make no difference; that's a no-risk scenario.

I specifically urge you to talk about the starting time. That is 100% in the DM's control.

Stealth Marmot
2017-04-11, 02:20 AM
If you are having fun, stay.

If you aren't, leave.

And here we have it.

Honest Tiefling
2017-04-11, 07:21 PM
Hrm. I think I disagree a smidge. None of those actions seem to be born of malice, just...A lack of attention span. The DM might be quite new and spotlight juggling is quite a skill to learn.

I would (politely) (and out of the session) discuss with the DM the issues. Communication is going to be key to joining ANY campaign, and keeping them going after all. The DM might not be aware of your issues and thinks everything is fine and dandy. At least give the guy a chance to change things!

If the DM is going to treat friends of his better then potential friends sitting (well, virtually sitting anyway) at the same table, get out of there like the game was going to explode, however. Everyone at the table is equal, regardless of relationship status. And new players are just friends that haven't been made yet in my opinion.

StarLightPips
2017-04-13, 02:46 AM
Thank you everyone who has commented.

I'mm taking the advice to get the hell out since I've just found out they've once again switched times I can't even keep up anymore.

Thanks for the help everyone.

Dappershire
2017-04-13, 04:41 AM
Thank you everyone who has commented.

I'mm taking the advice to get the hell out since I've just found out they've once again switched times I can't even keep up anymore.

Thanks for the help everyone.

Without going Team Rocket on them first?
I dub thee lame, sir. Lame, indeed! Quite. Hurrumph hurrumph hurrumph.

Anonymouswizard
2017-04-13, 04:56 AM
Without going Team Rocket on them first?
I dub thee lame, sir. Lame, indeed! Quite. Hurrumph hurrumph hurrumph.

While being an arse or derailing a game is good fun it becomes a problem if people know you derail games or groups you don't like.

Anyway, Sir. Lame is a silly name, and it's not any better if you say it like James Bond :smalltongue:

StarLightPips
2017-04-13, 05:18 AM
Without going Team Rocket on them first?
I dub thee lame, sir. Lame, indeed! Quite. Hurrumph hurrumph hurrumph.

Hahaha it sounded like a fun idea but I can't even attend the next session they're having XD