Weirdest thing you've made up rules for on the spot

[ThurlRavenscrof]

I recently have to make rules and consequences for eye replacement surgery for a player. What are your stories?

[Finback]

Flight speed for a gnome that is being thrown by a goliath. That is, how far they would travel in a turn.
Decided it was 2xSTRbonusx5ft.

[danksteel]

PC had a sexual "encounter" with reoccurring NPC. PC wanted possibility of becoming pregnant. Went with both individuals roll a d20 and add their con mod, if the combined total is greater than or equal to 35, the woman becomes pregnant and it is assumed that the foetus would survive through the first trimester, assuming no outside "intervention". The PC did not become pregnant.

[Kane0]

The hotness scale/score

If you don't want to mess around roll 1d10. Thats your 1-10 score.

For those who have too much time, You have a head/face, chest, groin, buttocks, skill/experience and personality, each of which is 2d4.
To determine your total take your average and add a further 1d4. Particularly beautiful (succubus) or grotesque (gnomes) creatures add or remove a bonus 1d4

[Quoxis]

The hotness scale/score

If you don't want to mess around roll 1d10. Thats your 1-10 score.

For those who have too much time, You have a head/face, chest, groin, buttocks, skill/experience and personality, each of which is 2d4.
To determine your total take your average and add a further 1d4. Particularly beautiful (succubus) or grotesque (gnomes) creatures add or remove a bonus 1d4


Is that from F.A.T.A.L. or completely homebrewed by you?
Also: where's the orificial circumference scale?

[Zorku]

Are we talking mechanics or just rulings?

This probably isn't that weird to veterans of the game, but figuring out how non dragon(born) races handle laying eggs after they decided to get them a lil' strange. My sensibilities were kind of the opposite of the easy solution most people seem to go with...

The result ended up being a PC in the next campaign we did though.

[Kane0]

Is that from F.A.T.A.L. or completely homebrewed by you?
Also: where's the orificial circumference scale?

Nah, we came up with it to pass the time while the DM took a breather to figure out how to salvage a situation following some antics of ours. Downtime stuff, y'know?
We wanted to retain at least some semblance of decorum :smallwink:

[Sariel Vailo]

not only getting laid but the length of the ahem 'ENCOUNTER" he had a high constitution and a high dexterity and she was a nympho. goliath d satisfied this human a little to well i made up a thing to see if shed get pregnant. and in the end ive had to use this system alot since i origionally came up with it.
bbbbbaka hentai.

[Kane0]

We just roll Performance for that. Its about the most use we get out of the skill really.

I'm beginning to see a trend...

[CaptainSarathai]

Steering away from weird, Ero-RPG stuff...

The most unique thing that I've ever had to account for was rules for drugs, particularly LSD/"Acid"

It took 2 campaigns to come together, but it was absurd and amazing and everything I love about D&D.
It started with an Assassin Rogue who wanted to be able to administer poisons to her weapons, as well as slip them into drinks, food, and all that. So we agree on some rules and get it all set up how we'll handle her poisoning people at the table. All the while, she's using natural poisons that she has reasonable access to, so poison making is more or less waived.

Cut to next campaign. The former Bard player has been watching these poisonings and formulating the idea for a character.
He tells me that he wants to build a character based on the "terror flower" from 'Batman Begins'. I'm thinking,
"Alright, he's gonna run a Warlock or maybe Bard or something with lots of mind-control effects."
Nope!
He goes, of all things, Monk. Makes sense, the guys Batman trained with were ninjas, and Shadow Monks are close to that.
But it doesn't explain where the Fear effects are coming from. Answer: drugs. Not magic, just drugs.

The character is basically "cooking" various concoctions, like an alchemist, that are all 1:1 translations of various drugs. Particularly, hallucinogens like LSD, which he got very 'creative' with. He'd use them to sow confusion and terror, but also use them during investigations, use them for frauds and cons, all sorts of tricks.
We had to work out crafting rules for the stuff, delivery methods, and rules that would not overshadow the equivalent Magical means of these effects.

I have to admit, it was a cool character, and he never went overboard and tried to exploit anything. Still, it was very powerful and stretched the limits of what we've done in the game.

[ruy343]

Perhaps not weirdest, but when a PC totally says something that an NPC would find offensive, I have them roll a Charisma Saving Throw - allowing them to actually use that save, and showing that they can somehow charm their way out of the corner they've painted themselves into.

[ChainsawFlwrcld]

How much damage does a mostly dead dwarf in +1 Platemale armor do to a Vampire when thrown by an Ogrish thing with a 24 Strength, and does he count as a magic weapon since the armor is magical.

[sightlessrealit]

PC "doing" a barrel in their sleep.

Making a vomit drinking game on the spot.

[Quoxis]

How much damage does a mostly dead dwarf in +1 Platemale armor do to a Vampire when thrown by an Ogrish thing with a 24 Strength, and does he count as a magic weapon since the armor is magical.

Well, does he? I'd think not as the armor's magic is supposed to keep whatever is in it save and not much else, but how did you rule?

[Cybren]

Using the GURPSaction templates I made up an entire one shot on the premise of the players having to break into The McFortress for The Colonel, involving NPCs like Mickey the Rat

[Adderbane]

The chance of the wizard's weight on the wagon wheel-chain-spear contraption being able to drag the owlbear off the bridge will be an opposed strength check with disadvantage on the prone owlbear.

[Dudewithknives]

In 3.5 had to figure out how much damage a pillow filled with 500 Feather Token Anchors would do.

This lead straight into trying to figure how much weight a rope bridge can hold.

How much damage does a stocking filled with 100 copper do?

[solidork]

In my high school game, at one point we had to make a tastiness check to see who would get eaten first by a monster.

[The-0-Endless]

Trying to find out how much inflation will happen when one player spends 2.5 million platinum on to turn an entire mountain into a stone golem.
This has resulted in me never letting tinker gnomes reach epic level.
Also, the formula for anyone interested was 1.000000000000001 x #ofsilver = addition to prices rounded down to the nearest copper.

[Ninja-Radish]

Well, I did make up game mechanics for a rugby match once because my players challenged a rival group to a game of rugger lol.

[ThurlRavenscrof]

These are all amazing... This is why I love D&D

[Vogie]

Well, I did make up game mechanics for a rugby match once because my players challenged a rival group to a game of rugger lol.

Hahahahaha that's amazing.

I hate it when you're in the middle of a Rugby match and you have to roll initiative...

[Mikal]

Damage a chicken with metal spurs on does when tossed in the face of an orc.