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Lord Torath
2017-06-02, 10:16 AM
You are on a (D&D - specific edition is probably unimportant) quest to defeat a lesser deity in the Abyss, and have been granted 4 wishes which must be used in 40 minutes, or you lose them (said wishes have been provided by a neutral magic item, not by a deity or Abyssal power). Your party is is decent shape, and no one's died lately. What do you wish for? Assume no wish twisting unless the wish is "excessive" (for what ever that really means).

lx66
2017-06-02, 01:02 PM
Wish for... Advantage on all rolls until the quest is done. :P

Its a bit too vague to get a more specific idea, imo.

khadgar567
2017-06-02, 01:35 PM
Cast of mass persist epic guidance of avatar as first safe wish then eternal wand of contengiency then feats item contengiency and craft contengency

Fable Wright
2017-06-02, 01:42 PM
I don't know the DM. At all. Is every non-safe wish out to screw you? Are non-safe wishes protected by rule of cool? Is this 5th edition wish or 3.5 edition wish? Are we aiming for more narrative benefits or more mechanical ones? What do we know about the lesser deity? What's in the cosmology that could be useful?

For a narrative standpoint, cherrypicking the best of 3.5 and 5e safe effects, I would use Transport Travelers (3.5e) to move the party, our strongest allies, and the lesser deity to a location that could would allow us to begin what is essentially a cage match, use two other wishes to grant the party Resistance to the type of damage the deity is most likely to use, and Immunity to their most dangerous special ability that we know about, and use the last wish late in the fight to full heal the party. One epic final battle against a god. Seems perfect.

From a 'solve the problem as efficiently as possible' standpoint, I would wish that my next spell is not resisted, wish the lesser deity into Tharizdun's cage in the Demiplane of Imprisonment, then use the other two wishes on our rewards. Sticking any deity in close proximity with Tharizdun will get that deity dead, and even if it doesn't, even Tharizdun can only act like a DR 11 creature in the demiplane after millennia of building its power. A lesser deity wouldn't be able to do squat, even if they had Tharizdun's backing.

If we were confident that we could take out the god already, Wizard gets a Staff of the Archmagi, Paladin gets his Holy Avenger, etc. etc.

ExLibrisMortis
2017-06-02, 03:05 PM
I'd go for some classic stuff: the bait to lure, the armour to protect, the chain to bind, the weapon to slay. Or something like that. Point is, if you ask for simple magical gear to achieve your demon-slaying goals, the DM isn't likely to screw you over as much, it's probably going to be useful all over the Abyss, and you can always sell it later. It also makes for a better story than wishing for 4*25 000 gp.

Yora
2017-06-02, 03:12 PM
I think with a wish you should be able to learn some really useful and detailed information about your enemey. Not having weeks to plan and prepare before using the other wishes is a bit of a drawback, though.
Probably best to start with a divination, maybr follow it up with another one, and then wish for two permanent things that you can keep in store while working on your preparations.

oxybe
2017-06-02, 06:17 PM
I wish for the best pancake ever.
I wish for the best butter ever.
I wish for the best maple syrup ever.
I wish that pancakes taste like manure for everyone else.

Without a bit more context or personal investment in the outcome, that's what imma wish for.

noob
2017-06-02, 08:49 PM
Step 1: wish for more fish.
Step 2: fish for more enemies
Step 3: wish your enemies would win
Step 4: wish all the food you own to be poisoned.
Step 5: run around confused
Step 6: wish for an extra gibbering mouther.
Step 7: have a lot of extra problems without needing your gm to misinterpret your wishes.
Step 8: the gm bans you from his table(if he does not do that then leave his table on your own)