I said slay the Dragon not laid the dragon

[Akisa]

after being reminded of a recent web comic about nerf now, I was wondering if anyone have story groups trying to charm their way out of an encounter?

[Ralanr]

My friend did once with the BBEG. In the middle of a fight we were losing he ended up proposing to the cult leader.

My DM rolled a Nat 1 for the save.

What would have ended in a big boss battle instead ended in a wedding.

[Dunsparce]

I once played with someone in a 3.5 game who played a female Goblin Beguiler that used her feminine charms to seduce enemies, I should point out he went out of his way to describe how repulsive she looked(Goblin and all) but she usually rolled so high the enemy fell for them anyways. And then they let lose a spell to disable them, never really went farther than that.

[Bebbit]

The party was faced with a few huge Earth Elementals. After downing all but 1, our female Monk decided the best way to distract it for the others to kill it would be to give it a blow job.
And she's continued her promiscuity in most of the encounters with big bads.

[AnBe]

My friend is playing a horrible, evil, manipulative bastard with a high charisma. He's a summoner synthesist with a tentacle eidolon. It gets kinky. I feel frustrated. This is supposed to be Pathfinder, not Pornfinder. He's seduced and had sex with at least 6 women in the game so far, and we're only 3 sessions in. And what's worse, he impregnated each woman he banged with a demon baby, and it is very unlikely any of them will survive giving birth.
It's time to stop, mr. summoner man, it's time to stop.

[Dappershire]

My friend is playing a horrible, evil, manipulative bastard with a high charisma. He's a summoner synthesist with a tentacle eidolon. It gets kinky. I feel frustrated. This is supposed to be Pathfinder, not Pornfinder. He's seduced and had sex with at least 6 women in the game so far, and we're only 3 sessions in. And what's worse, he impregnated each woman he banged with a demon baby, and it is very unlikely any of them will survive giving birth.
It's time to stop, mr. summoner man, it's time to stop.

I think now is when he starts mistaking male elves for females, and realizing just how much trouble a good charisma roll can get him into.

[Frozen_Feet]

Was running Red&Plesant Land to friends. Made mistake of showing illustrations of the vampires to my players. They decided they were hot. End result: two-thirds of player characters are vampites now, thralls to leaders of two different sides, and bedded a footsoldier from a third.

[TheCountAlucard]

I think now is when he starts mistaking male elves for females, and realizing just how much trouble a good charisma roll can get him into.The problems with this strategy are both ponderous and layered.

[Akisa]

I think now is when he starts mistaking male elves for females, and realizing just how much trouble a good charisma roll can get him into.

wait... there are male Elves?

[Martin Greywolf]

Charm my way out of encounter? I try it every time I can. Charming my way out of encounter with feminine/masculine/misc wiles, not so often, but it does happen with some characters.

My favourite one has to be a local assortment of thugs wanting to shake an associate of mine down for money, so I jumped in with illusion on my male-but-girly character to look like a girl I knew (and who happened to be observing from a hiding spot). Long story short, it turned out the chief thug was a lot smarter than he looked, we had a date-slash-drinking contest that he lost badly (to what he believed to be a girl a third of his weight) and moved on.

Funny thing is, we told him what was what in the end, he helped us against the local thugs once we convinced him we could offer him better future prospects with less slave trading and we laugh about the incident to this day. Even the girl I was kind of impersonating with illusions could see the funny side of it, after some character development. And pouting. And a death threat or two.

Good times.

[Âmesang]

Typically I try to play my charismatic characters like Fletch (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fletch_(film)) or Axel Foley (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Axel_Foley), so I think the worst I've done was have a particularly curvaceous sorceress turn around, bend over, and spank herself in an attempt to get some (turning out to be mind-controlled) cultists to come attack her… well… her and the zombie hydra she had animated.

I can't recall if I ever had her pull her top down but otherwise I tend to have her rely more on words than actions—after all, if she wants some "fun" she can just polymorph her familiar. :smallwink:

On the other hand I've had fellow players try to lay every female they could see… some with more success than others… almost makes me glad I had once bought the Book of Erotic Fantasy… at least for the race compatibility table…

[bunnynoah]

To be honest, I did lay a dragon to appease her. Was a human bard, and I thought it would be better to charm her rather than the party risk dying fighting. I rolled a little too well, and it ended a lot like the scene in Shrek 1 with Donkey and the Dragon.

Several sessions later (Roughly a few years in game) A rather suspicious young half-dragon showed up. It was at this point that the DM was trolling us. (He kinda was the only one who remembered)

[Velaryon]

In a recent 5e campaign of Curse of Strahd, the party druid's reason for adventuring is to find a suitably powerful mate so she can go back to her tribe with a powerful (i.e. some kind of more-than-mundane-humanoid) child. She seduced one of the wereravens in Vallaki and had designs on Strahd himself at first, though she reconsidered that when he found a young 14 year-old girl in the castle who was believed to be a conquest of Strahd's.

Meanwhile, the half-orc paladin seduced the current reincarnation of Strahd's long-lost love and ended up not only saving her, but taking her with him out of Barovia when we left.

[Honest Tiefling]

This is why my groups have a firm 'No Murder-Harem' rule. I do not care how high your charisma is. I do not care what gender, sex or whatever you or your character is. You cannot use your squishy bits to get an unfair advantage over non-Charisma builds.

I would be fine with 'charming' to get out of an encounter as long as it can be handled in such a fashion that makes everyone at the table comfortable and the spotlight gets shared.

[LordCdrMilitant]

Charming my way out of an encounter? I try, sometimes, but it doesn't involve seduction.

I think I've only tried to seduce a character once. We were visiting a nobleman's estate. He had a wife much younger than he was, who was a trophy from the native peoples of the territory he oversaw, and was described as having his eyes looking at places other than my eyes when we were introduced to him, and later his hands wandering to places they shouldn't be wandering to in a polite, formal dinner for previously unacquainted nobles. As he stood in the path of our immediate objective, we decided that, if he was having trouble keeping his eyes and hands to himself, we might as well use the opportunity to get rid of him. We arranged a "slightly more private" meeting, with just me and the rogue, who's false identity was also that of a noblewoman, and him, to "discuss business matters in more detail", and while I kept his undivided attention on my "tracts of land", the rogue slipped him some poison that would kill him at the stroke of midnight. At night, other party members staged an attack on a local military force, posing as members of the local native peoples who were in open revolt, and the poisoning of the nobleman was written off as another terrorist attack.

[sktarq]

Encounter? What encounter? No I just fast talked, bluffed, disguised, or seduced my way passed a skill check. . . . I swear I never saw the full combat dice set the DM pulled out by happenstance at the same time as the skill check target rolls. Those were just in case of critical failure.

Personally I love high charisma parties. The you get four+ character doing the above.

[Samzat]

I would love to play an evil bard who intimidates his way out of everything, but I would never want to play a "seduce everything that moves" character. Confronted with such an abomination, the best solution is to push a boulder down the hill and while they are finding a way to copulate with it, abandon them to their misdeeds. Without other adventurers to aid them, they will be caught and snipped in no time

[Bohandas]

Surprised nobody's posted this yet

http://gamegm.deviantart.com/art/I-told-you-to-slay-the-dragon-not-lay-it-356147191


http://orig14.deviantart.net/8d86/f/2013/055/7/f/i_told_you_to_slay_the_dragon_not_lay_it_by_gamegm-d5w1gxj.jpg

[goto124]

push a boulder down the hill and while they are finding a way to copulate with it,

https://68.media.tumblr.com/12c8da578cc2400e7d76b5f9b3c18df6/tumblr_inline_oh9ukm89Wd1qdq19t_1280.jpg

[Lord Torath]

The party was faced with a few huge Earth Elementals. After downing all but 1, our female Monk decided the best way to distract it for the others to kill it would be to give it a blow job.
And she's continued her promiscuity in most of the encounters with big bads.I, uh... I didn't realize elementals reproduced sexually. :smallconfused:


https://68.media.tumblr.com/12c8da578cc2400e7d76b5f9b3c18df6/tumblr_inline_oh9ukm89Wd1qdq19t_1280.jpgLearn something new every day. :smalleek:

[Bebbit]

I, uh... I didn't realize elementals reproduced sexually. :smallconfused:


They don't. She didn't care.

[Anonymouswizard]

Never used seduction, but I've previously but characters around 'you mean that wasn't a social encounter?'


My friend is playing a horrible, evil, manipulative bastard with a high charisma. He's a summoner synthesist with a tentacle eidolon. It gets kinky. I feel frustrated. This is supposed to be Pathfinder, not Pornfinder. He's seduced and had sex with at least 6 women in the game so far, and we're only 3 sessions in. And what's worse, he impregnated each woman he banged with a demon baby, and it is very unlikely any of them will survive giving birth.
It's time to stop, mr. summoner man, it's time to stop.

Sounds like a plot hook. While I'd cut out roleplaying the sex scenes of wait for twelve months to pass in game, then have the next town react to him as the bringer of the demon-baby apocalypse sweeping the land.


I think now is when he starts mistaking male elves for females, and realizing just how much trouble a good charisma roll can get him into.

Wait, are male elves traditionally tops or bottoms when doing it with human men? I assumed the latter, but I don't know how most human men rest to the revelation.

I mean, I've had characters who would seduce people of the same sex if the game allowed. But I'm also openly bisexual in real life, so I don't give a darn what genders are in the in-game act.


Typically I try to play my charismatic characters like Fletch (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fletch_(film)) or Axel Foley (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Axel_Foley), so I think the worst I've done was have a particularly curvaceous sorceress turn around, bend over, and spank herself in an attempt to get some (turning out to be mind-controlled)

I just stopped reading here, didn't want to ruin the mental image.


Encounter? What encounter? No I just fast talked, bluffed, disguised, or seduced my way passed a skill check. . . . I swear I never saw the full combat dice set the DM pulled out by happenstance at the same time as the skill check target rolls. Those were just in case of critical failure.

Personally I love high charisma parties. The you get four+ character doing the above.

I was once in a GURPS game where three characters had 15+ in Diplomacy or Fast Talk (I also had high intimidate). We spent six sessions wondering if there was no combat intended in the campaign because we'd talked our way out of almost every combat encounter (which ended when the opponent's realised how underarmed they were when two struck and suddenly hit armour*). At the end almost every combat encounter featured assassins trying to hit us with poisoned days and run away (a grand total of two didn't).

That group spent a lot of time trying to avoid combat. We once played a combat heavy game with one character with decent combat skills and three insane mages (gotta love Unknown Armies). Then again, an entire fight ended up being shooting pigeons and one shotting the session villain as he got off the bus (and then traumatising him with London clay), and survived another fight because we'd asked engineers to an electrical fault.

* Totally worth spending a decent chunk of my starting money on an antique breastplate to wear under my robes (later joined by a mass produced cloak of armour), the party Skaven skirt even more on enchanted clothes.

[Lord Torath]

I, uh... I didn't realize elementals reproduced sexually. :smallconfused:

They don't. She didn't care.So the elemental just let her mash her lips to its body, and didn't take +4 bonus to hit (or whatever) on her now vulnerable position (presumably kneeling in front of it, making no attempt to defend herself)?

[Bebbit]

So the elemental just let her mash her lips to its body, and didn't take +4 bonus to hit (or whatever) on her now vulnerable position (presumably kneeling in front of it, making no attempt to defend herself)?

I mean, if it got to that point then yeah something bad may have happened. The very next turn though the Barb/Warblade demolished it, so it didn't really have a chance. It missed on its AoO, and then the fight was over.

[Akisa]

I, uh... I didn't realize elementals reproduced sexually. :smallconfused:

Learn something new every day. :smalleek:

When there is a will there is a way as evidence by this

https://i.warosu.org/data/tg/img/0402/37/1432831072340.jpg

[Joe the Rat]

When there is a will there is a way as evidence by this

Family Photos Are Awkward
Bards, amirite?!
(I always loved how the Tlincali and Centauridae (and the kids) interact in this one)

This was going to be a plot point in my current game (with a bit of a time skip if needed), except that the rogue in question left the party. Tracking him down may be what unites the various and disparate groups.

[Psyren]

My friend did once with the BBEG. In the middle of a fight we were losing he ended up proposing to the cult leader.

My DM rolled a Nat 1 for the save.

What would have ended in a big boss battle instead ended in a wedding.

This is literally this webcomic (https://mythjae.wordpress.com/2016/01/28/fated-3/)

[wumpus]

https://68.media.tumblr.com/12c8da578cc2400e7d76b5f9b3c18df6/tumblr_inline_oh9ukm89Wd1qdq19t_1280.jpg

I'd expect the dwarf to be the jealous party in this comic. Or possibly the daddy, with the rest of the party wondering about the inversion.

[goto124]

This is literally this webcomic (https://mythjae.wordpress.com/2016/01/28/fated-3/)

Ah, a classic for the ages.

Also, is the last panel a reference to something?

[Lord Torath]

Bards, amirite?!
(I always loved how the Tlincali and Centauridae (and the kids) interact in this one)Is the Tlincali the tiger-striped lady next to the centaur? What exactly is a Tlincali?

[hamishspence]

Scorpion centaurs from Monsters of Faerun. They're also called "stingers"

Actually they lack pincers, unlike scorpionfolk from MM2

You can see the pincers on the child, (the parent's are obscured a bit behind the other children)

MoF "stinger"

http://archive.wizards.com/dnd/images/mof_gallery/MonFaePG81.jpg

MM2 Scorpionfolk

http://archive.wizards.com/dnd/images/mm2_gallery/88268_620_111.jpg

Which would suggest that the Family Gathering image shows a mother scorpionfolk rather than a mother tlincali.

[Joe the Rat]

I was debating the presence of pincers v. big legs (I'm having trouble visualizing the connection to the body), but you may be right there. And holy crap scorpionfolk have hands for feet?!

I just figured the Calybos' hands were part of the mix-n-match Lego genetics at play here. Yes I gave them names.