Jormengand
2017-06-15, 12:28 PM
Deep within the [adjective] [location], the [adjective] [Title] [Name] [verbs], waiting for an [adjective] [noun] to stop [pronoun]... or [verb] trying. Dare you [verb] to [verb] [pronoun], [preposition] [adjective] [noun]?
Noun: The Verbing is a cross between Mad Libs and a standard(ish) role-playing game. It's not meant to be taken too seriously.
To play a game of Noun: The Verbing, you will need a few standard six-sided dice, some players, and a person to run the game, as well as some writing implements and some pieces of paper or card which have been cut down to a size large enough to write a word on them - you'll need twenth-five for each player and twenty-five for the player running the game, but it's good to have some spares.
First, the person running the game - who is hereafter referred to as the Arbiter - tells the players some basic details about the world, so they know what to expect and what kinds of items are around. If it's a story about heroes with swords slaying dragons, there probably aren't too many guns or robots floating around, for example.
There are three stages to playing: the set-up, the initial story, and situations.
Stage 1: Set-up
Then, every player, and the Arbiter, each writes down:
- Ten nouns which aren't locations or names (use the singular form)
- Ten verbs (use the infinitive form minus the word "To" - so "Be" or "Go" or "See" or "Have")
- Ten first names.
- Five locations (they can either be actual names of places in the setting, like "Earth" or "America", or generic places like "Castle" or "Town" or "Home")
- Five adjectives (words like "Large" or "Fast" or "Grey")
- Five adverbs (words like "Slowly" or "Wildly" or "Vaguely")
- Five prepositions (words like "Before" or "With" or "Under")
- Five titles (Words like "Mister" or "Lady" or "Sir")
You should work together to avoid duplicates, and the nouns and verbs should be the type of things which can create or remove problems. In general, all the words should be appropriate to the setting.
Once you have done this, put each card onto a pile with the others of the same type - all the titles together, all the nouns which aren't names or locations together, and so forth.
Stage 2: The Initial Story
The Arbiter then describes an initial storyline which the players' characters are going to be a part of, and each player describes the character they are playing. However, they can only do so in very vague terms.
Every noun, verb, name, location, adjective, adverb, preposition and title is replaced with a random one from the deck. Each article and pronoun is replaced with the appropriate one for whatever it refers to (for example, if you say "[Article] [noun] [verbs]. [Pronoun] also [verbs]", then if you drew "King" as the noun you would have "The" as the article and "He" as the pronoun). The exceptions are things that are part of a construction - for example, "He is going to go" becomes "[Pronoun] is going to [verb]", not "[Pronoun] [verbs] [verbing] [verb]". A player or the Arbiter may choose to draw a noun instead of a verb, and use the verb form of the noun ("Hammering", "Tailing" and so forth), or vice versa ("A fight", "A start", "An act"), or they may draw an adjective instead of a noun and use the noun form of it ("Blackness", "Wisdom"), or an adjective instead of a verb ("Blackening", "Wisen") or vice versa ("He was totally hammered"/"This is a fighting dog"), and so forth ("Wise" becomes "Wisely" when drawn as an adverb, "King" can be a noun or a title...).
Finally, the Arbiter can decide that some of the words are important for the introduction to make any sense, and keep them as they are. For example, the Arbiter could use the introduction given at the start ("Deep within the [adjective] [location], the [adjective] [Title] [Name] [verbs], waiting for an [adjective] [noun] to stop [pronoun]... or [verb] trying.") even though "Deep" "Within", "Waiting" and "Stop" should by rights be replaced. Players can also ask to keep words in their backstory at the arbiter's discretion. For example, a player might wish their character to "Wield her trusty [noun]", even though "Wield" and "Trusty" should normally be replaced. Players may name their characters as they wish rather than choosing one of the cards, but if they do, get a new blank card, write their name on it, and shuffle it into the names deck.
If the word is a different form from the one written on the card, you should change it - for example, if you want to say "Many [nouns] have been [verbed]" and you draw "Sword" and "Throw" the sentence becomes "Many swords have been thrown".
(Example: "Sandra the [noun] is a master of the [noun], and [verbed] by her faithful companion, [name] the [noun]. She wants to [verb] the villain, in order to [verb] her [noun]." If "Sandra" isn't already a listed name, Sandra's player writes her name on a card and shuffles it into the names deck.)
Players and the Arbiter can invoke the But That Doesn't Make Any Sense! rule at this point - it's described later but is important if you have sentences which don't make grammatical sense. Otherwise, once you're all done, you can move on to step three.
Step 3: Situations
The road to verb Title Name is an adjective and adjective one, fraught with nouns intent on verbing you. You must verb back, before it's too adjective!
The initial story made by the Arbiter represents the ultimate goal of the player characters, but they will face many dangers on the way, and have to react to them.Each situation is resolved as follows:
- The Arbiter describes what situation has befallen the party, using the word substitution method given in step 2.
- The Arbiter decides whether this situation is threatening, assigning it a threat level if it is. The threat level should range from the number of players (for situations which aren't very threatening) to 4 times that number (for situations which are really very threatening, such as meeting the ultimate villain Title Name). If the situation isn't threatening, or even if it is, the Arbiter can also assign difficulties to other tasks that the players might attempt to undertake during the scene. The difficulties range from 1 (for tasks which are very easy for one person) to 4 times the number of players (for tasks which are very difficult for everyone combined). The players can try to accomplish tasks that weren't yet listed, but the Arbiter can decide that some tasks are simply impossible (or use very large difficulties as a shorthand for just how impossible).
- The Arbiter, talking normally (not using substitution) explains why this situation is threatening or expounds on what exactly the resulting words mean.
- Each player then simultaneously decides what they're going to do about it. They don't draw any cards until all of them have decided what their sentence structure will be (but they don't decide what their sentence structure will be until after the Arbiter has drawn cards).
- The players then draw their cards.
- The players take it in turns to, talking normally, explain why the action their character just took is relevant to a task or helps solve the threat, and explain what they hope to achieve.
- The Arbiter decides how effective the proposed course of action is at resolving the situation or doing other tasks, from 0 to 5. For example, if the players are fighting a dragon, and a player says "My character will [verb] [article] [noun] [preposition] [article] [noun]" and draws "Throw" "Hammer" "At" and "Dragon", their attack may be very effective without much explanation. If they "Create an orc with a sword" they need only explain that the orc fights the dragon for them (presumably as thanks for being created, and with a sword no less). If they instead "Attack the sea with a dog" they will need to do some explanation of how this is even moderately useful in the situation. In any case, well-explained answers which make sense should get fairly high scores. Also, a character who should be good at doing that type of action should get a higher effectiveness rating.
- The Arbiter takes a number of dice equal to the threat level, and rolls them. Each player who is trying to solve the threat rolls a number of dice equal to their effectiveness. If the players' total roll - adding all their dice together - is equal to or greater than the Arbiter's, they have solved the threat.
- For each other task the players are attempting, the Arbiter rolls a number of dice equal to the task's difficulty. Each player who is trying to complete the task rolls a number of dice equal to their effectiveness. If the players' total roll is equal to or greater than the Arbiter's, they have accomplished the task.
Solving the threat is usually necessary in order to progress - if they fail to solve the threat directly, the players may have to find another way to remove it, or they may be defeated or lose something of value, or miss a valuable opportunity. If they fail to defeat the grey cat that guards the legendary statue of hate, they may have to find a back entrance into the chamber holding the statue, which would come with its own threats. Other tasks should provide information or items that are useful, or some other useful result.
But That Doesn't Make Any Sense!
Sometimes, you get a result that just doesn't make any sense. I don't mean in the sense of "I throw the sea with grace", but in the sense of "I eat the dragon between Dave." You can't eat something between someone. The sentence doesn't just refer to something which isn't possible, but which isn't even meaningful. If you get a sentence like this, then any player or the Arbiter can declare "But that doesn't make any sense!"
- First, the Arbiter has a chance to deny that the sentence doesn't make any sense. If a player manages to convince the Arbiter that the sentence is meaningful, the Arbiter can deny their own "But that doesn't make any sense!"
- Second, try to make minimal changes to the sentence so that it makes sense with the same words - for example, "Between me and Dave, we eat the dragon".
- Third, find the words which are making the sentence not make sense. "Between" is definitely the problem; it could be swapped for "With" and the sentence would make sense. Re-draw those words.
Then, the new sentence is used.
Freedom of Speech
Not all actions have to be done with the word-substitution; in general, describing the macrocosmic plan that the players have ("We'll go to the temple of wisdom and try to find the statue of hate") can just be done. Similarly, talking to people, buying equipment, and the like is usually just possible. The word-substitution and die rolls should only be done to resolve conflicts; to resolve difficult conversations (that is, conversations which also have a threat/difficulty rating) the characters should be able to say "I talk about [nouns]" (or other sentences starting with "I talk about" or "I say that") without "Talk" or "About" (or "Say" or "Speak" or "Convince", and so on) being substituted. The conflict-resolution system is generally only put in place once the players have a plan and something impedes the characters' attempt to carry it out.
Player Versus Player
If two or more players come into conflict, the player who is starting the conflict is treated as the threat. The threat level is determined by the Arbiter's decision on their attack's effectiveness. The other players need to try to overcome the threat or add to the threat if they want to contribute. If the threat is overcome, the defending player has won; otherwise the attacking player has won. What exactly results from that is the Arbiter's decision but should be related to what exactly the attacker intended.
Example of Play
John, Jane and Jayden are sitting down to play Noun: The Verbing. Jane is playing as the Arbiter, and she says that the world is a futuristic space setting with psychic powers. First, the three of them take the time to write down their words:
Noun
Verb
Name
Location
Adjective
Adverb
Preposition
Title
Ship
Go
Anna
Star
Large
Somewhat
To
Sir/Madam
Wall
Take
Tom
Mercury
Fast
Continually
With
Mr/Mrs
Gun
Attack
Frank
Uranus
Violent
Internally
By
Master/Miss
Floor
Throw
Lydia
Earth
Bad
Vaguely
From
Lord/Lady
Crystal
Get
Zoe
Pluto
Good
Alone
About
Baron/Baroness
Space
Hide
Charlie
Sun
Flexible
Truly
Through
Emperor/Empress
Hatch
Fly
Jamie
Mars
Hard
Overtly
Under
Duke/Duchess
Robot
Move
Ethan
Space
Dark
Slowly
On
King/Queen
System
Save
Mark
Neptune
Psychic
Apparently
Beside
Saint
Alien
Drop
Delilah
Venus
Effective
Fortunately
In
Archbishop
Pirate
Activate
Caiden
Jupiter
Strange
Exceptionally
Before
Commander
Fleet
Bypass
Brian
Saturn
Small
Persuasively
While
Sergeant
Mind
Undo
Fatima
Planet
Fatal
Mentally
Around
Captain
Knife
Cast
Hayley
Asteroid
Strong
Implicitly
Alongside
Doctor
Spanner
Make
Mycah
Moon
Great
Secretly
After
Professor
Supply
Stop
Gemma
Rebel
Shoot
Pete
Process
Pilot
Malachai
Medic
Jump
Sasha
Wire
Consume
Ariel
Guard
Sabotage
Lee
Metal
Taunt
Rachael
Clothing
Sell
David
Power
Repair
Sam
Fire
Swap
Rebekah
Food
Protect
Jessamyn
Commander
Give
Callum
Ammunition
Invert
Omar
Armour
Burn
Steve
Water
Heal
Gabriel
With this done, Jane chooses her opening sentence:
"The galaxy has long been [verbed] by [nouns] and [nouns]. There was [nouned adjective] in those times - but no more. [Article] [noun] has risen up, lead by someone known only as [Title] [Noun]. You must stop [pronoun] before all turns to [nouns]. [Pronoun] may only be stopped by [verbing] the five [nouns]."
She then draws cards: they are "burn", "ship", "spanner", "good", "system", "captain" "pirate", "gun", "go" and "hatch".
"The galaxy has long been burned by ships and spanners. There was goodness in those times - but no more. The system has risen up, lead by someone known only as Captain Pirate. You must stop them before all turns to guns. They may only be stopped by going the five hatches." She quickly realises this doesn't quite make sense, and changes the last sentence to say "They may only be stopped by going to the five hatches".
Then, she explains the situation that the sentence bears out: there was a time when the galaxy was a place where space explorers found new and exciting things every day, using their ships to travel to far off asteroids and clean away all the resources from them - "Burning them with ship and spanner", so to speak. An enigmatic group of conformists called The System have decided that humanity can no longer continue its exploration, and have united under Captain Pirate, whose real name is unknown. Fighting the captain directly is no easy feat - to do so requires that you explore deep inside their spaceship, passing through several doors to reach them. But you must do so, before everyone else looks to their guns...
The other two players make their characters. Jayden explains that their character, [Name], used to be a [noun], before an unfortunate [nouned verb] caused them to lose their [noun], which they fight against the captain to reclaim, [verbing] [nouns] to help them. They draw "Jessamyn", "System", "Drop", "Hatch", "Take" and "Spanner." Jessamyn used to be a system, before an unfortunate drop caused her to lose her hatch, which she fights against the captain to reclaim, taking spanners to help her. Jayden explains that Jessamyn used to be a part of the system, but due to some bad maneuvers by a spaceship pilot, her squad were dumped on the floor while guarding one of the hatches. She was kicked out after that, even though it wasn't her fault. She wants to bust through that hatch just to prove a point, and wields her trusty spanner to help her.
Joe then presents his character: [Name] used to work for [nouned adjective], which was an important principle to [pronoun], but now that Captain Pirate threatens that, [pronoun] wields [pronoun's] trusty [noun] [adverb] to stop him. He draws "Hayley", "Flexible", "Knife" and "Continually". Hayley used to work for flexibility, which was an important principle to her, but now that Captain Pirate threatens that, she wields her trusty knife continually to stop him. He explains that his character believes that it's important that humans be able to adapt to anything - that is, be flexible - and that the System threatens their ability to do so with their radical conformism. Hayley's weapon of choice needs little explanation, and she never puts the damn thing down.
Then, they can begin playing. The first conflict is trying to get onto Captain Pirate's ship. Jane explains:
"On your way to Captain Pirate's ship, a group of [nouns] tries to [verb] you!"
She draws "System" and "Repair". Obviously, she explains, this is a group of members of The System who are trying to "Fix" you to become conformist using their psychic powers. She decides this is somewhat threatening, and assigns it a threat level of 5.
Jayden and Joe can act in either order. Joe decides first. "Hayley will [verb] [article] [noun] [preposition] [noun] [adverb]." He draws "Shoot" "Fleet" "Under" "Crystal" "Alone": Hayley will shoot the fleet under a crystal alone.
He explains that clearly, Hayley is setting up a psychic crystal to defend against their psychic attacks, and standing away from Jessamyn so the enemy can't attack them both at once, and using superior firepower to attack the enemy. Jane thinks this is a good and inventive explanation, worth 4 points of effectiveness.
Jayden says that Jessamyn will just [verb] [article] [noun], and draws "Bypass" and "Ship". Jessamyn takes control of their own craft and tries to avoid the enemy. Jess accepts this as a reasonable solution, worth 3 points.
The players then roll their 7 dice, and Jane rolls her 5. They both roll a total of 23, so the players just manage to defeat the threat, making it a little further towards the ship of Captain Pirate...
That's All, Folks!
Yes, this system is dumb. I hope it's fun, though. That's all that matters, right? Wrong, but close enough. Enjoy!
Noun: The Verbing is a cross between Mad Libs and a standard(ish) role-playing game. It's not meant to be taken too seriously.
To play a game of Noun: The Verbing, you will need a few standard six-sided dice, some players, and a person to run the game, as well as some writing implements and some pieces of paper or card which have been cut down to a size large enough to write a word on them - you'll need twenth-five for each player and twenty-five for the player running the game, but it's good to have some spares.
First, the person running the game - who is hereafter referred to as the Arbiter - tells the players some basic details about the world, so they know what to expect and what kinds of items are around. If it's a story about heroes with swords slaying dragons, there probably aren't too many guns or robots floating around, for example.
There are three stages to playing: the set-up, the initial story, and situations.
Stage 1: Set-up
Then, every player, and the Arbiter, each writes down:
- Ten nouns which aren't locations or names (use the singular form)
- Ten verbs (use the infinitive form minus the word "To" - so "Be" or "Go" or "See" or "Have")
- Ten first names.
- Five locations (they can either be actual names of places in the setting, like "Earth" or "America", or generic places like "Castle" or "Town" or "Home")
- Five adjectives (words like "Large" or "Fast" or "Grey")
- Five adverbs (words like "Slowly" or "Wildly" or "Vaguely")
- Five prepositions (words like "Before" or "With" or "Under")
- Five titles (Words like "Mister" or "Lady" or "Sir")
You should work together to avoid duplicates, and the nouns and verbs should be the type of things which can create or remove problems. In general, all the words should be appropriate to the setting.
Once you have done this, put each card onto a pile with the others of the same type - all the titles together, all the nouns which aren't names or locations together, and so forth.
Stage 2: The Initial Story
The Arbiter then describes an initial storyline which the players' characters are going to be a part of, and each player describes the character they are playing. However, they can only do so in very vague terms.
Every noun, verb, name, location, adjective, adverb, preposition and title is replaced with a random one from the deck. Each article and pronoun is replaced with the appropriate one for whatever it refers to (for example, if you say "[Article] [noun] [verbs]. [Pronoun] also [verbs]", then if you drew "King" as the noun you would have "The" as the article and "He" as the pronoun). The exceptions are things that are part of a construction - for example, "He is going to go" becomes "[Pronoun] is going to [verb]", not "[Pronoun] [verbs] [verbing] [verb]". A player or the Arbiter may choose to draw a noun instead of a verb, and use the verb form of the noun ("Hammering", "Tailing" and so forth), or vice versa ("A fight", "A start", "An act"), or they may draw an adjective instead of a noun and use the noun form of it ("Blackness", "Wisdom"), or an adjective instead of a verb ("Blackening", "Wisen") or vice versa ("He was totally hammered"/"This is a fighting dog"), and so forth ("Wise" becomes "Wisely" when drawn as an adverb, "King" can be a noun or a title...).
Finally, the Arbiter can decide that some of the words are important for the introduction to make any sense, and keep them as they are. For example, the Arbiter could use the introduction given at the start ("Deep within the [adjective] [location], the [adjective] [Title] [Name] [verbs], waiting for an [adjective] [noun] to stop [pronoun]... or [verb] trying.") even though "Deep" "Within", "Waiting" and "Stop" should by rights be replaced. Players can also ask to keep words in their backstory at the arbiter's discretion. For example, a player might wish their character to "Wield her trusty [noun]", even though "Wield" and "Trusty" should normally be replaced. Players may name their characters as they wish rather than choosing one of the cards, but if they do, get a new blank card, write their name on it, and shuffle it into the names deck.
If the word is a different form from the one written on the card, you should change it - for example, if you want to say "Many [nouns] have been [verbed]" and you draw "Sword" and "Throw" the sentence becomes "Many swords have been thrown".
(Example: "Sandra the [noun] is a master of the [noun], and [verbed] by her faithful companion, [name] the [noun]. She wants to [verb] the villain, in order to [verb] her [noun]." If "Sandra" isn't already a listed name, Sandra's player writes her name on a card and shuffles it into the names deck.)
Players and the Arbiter can invoke the But That Doesn't Make Any Sense! rule at this point - it's described later but is important if you have sentences which don't make grammatical sense. Otherwise, once you're all done, you can move on to step three.
Step 3: Situations
The road to verb Title Name is an adjective and adjective one, fraught with nouns intent on verbing you. You must verb back, before it's too adjective!
The initial story made by the Arbiter represents the ultimate goal of the player characters, but they will face many dangers on the way, and have to react to them.Each situation is resolved as follows:
- The Arbiter describes what situation has befallen the party, using the word substitution method given in step 2.
- The Arbiter decides whether this situation is threatening, assigning it a threat level if it is. The threat level should range from the number of players (for situations which aren't very threatening) to 4 times that number (for situations which are really very threatening, such as meeting the ultimate villain Title Name). If the situation isn't threatening, or even if it is, the Arbiter can also assign difficulties to other tasks that the players might attempt to undertake during the scene. The difficulties range from 1 (for tasks which are very easy for one person) to 4 times the number of players (for tasks which are very difficult for everyone combined). The players can try to accomplish tasks that weren't yet listed, but the Arbiter can decide that some tasks are simply impossible (or use very large difficulties as a shorthand for just how impossible).
- The Arbiter, talking normally (not using substitution) explains why this situation is threatening or expounds on what exactly the resulting words mean.
- Each player then simultaneously decides what they're going to do about it. They don't draw any cards until all of them have decided what their sentence structure will be (but they don't decide what their sentence structure will be until after the Arbiter has drawn cards).
- The players then draw their cards.
- The players take it in turns to, talking normally, explain why the action their character just took is relevant to a task or helps solve the threat, and explain what they hope to achieve.
- The Arbiter decides how effective the proposed course of action is at resolving the situation or doing other tasks, from 0 to 5. For example, if the players are fighting a dragon, and a player says "My character will [verb] [article] [noun] [preposition] [article] [noun]" and draws "Throw" "Hammer" "At" and "Dragon", their attack may be very effective without much explanation. If they "Create an orc with a sword" they need only explain that the orc fights the dragon for them (presumably as thanks for being created, and with a sword no less). If they instead "Attack the sea with a dog" they will need to do some explanation of how this is even moderately useful in the situation. In any case, well-explained answers which make sense should get fairly high scores. Also, a character who should be good at doing that type of action should get a higher effectiveness rating.
- The Arbiter takes a number of dice equal to the threat level, and rolls them. Each player who is trying to solve the threat rolls a number of dice equal to their effectiveness. If the players' total roll - adding all their dice together - is equal to or greater than the Arbiter's, they have solved the threat.
- For each other task the players are attempting, the Arbiter rolls a number of dice equal to the task's difficulty. Each player who is trying to complete the task rolls a number of dice equal to their effectiveness. If the players' total roll is equal to or greater than the Arbiter's, they have accomplished the task.
Solving the threat is usually necessary in order to progress - if they fail to solve the threat directly, the players may have to find another way to remove it, or they may be defeated or lose something of value, or miss a valuable opportunity. If they fail to defeat the grey cat that guards the legendary statue of hate, they may have to find a back entrance into the chamber holding the statue, which would come with its own threats. Other tasks should provide information or items that are useful, or some other useful result.
But That Doesn't Make Any Sense!
Sometimes, you get a result that just doesn't make any sense. I don't mean in the sense of "I throw the sea with grace", but in the sense of "I eat the dragon between Dave." You can't eat something between someone. The sentence doesn't just refer to something which isn't possible, but which isn't even meaningful. If you get a sentence like this, then any player or the Arbiter can declare "But that doesn't make any sense!"
- First, the Arbiter has a chance to deny that the sentence doesn't make any sense. If a player manages to convince the Arbiter that the sentence is meaningful, the Arbiter can deny their own "But that doesn't make any sense!"
- Second, try to make minimal changes to the sentence so that it makes sense with the same words - for example, "Between me and Dave, we eat the dragon".
- Third, find the words which are making the sentence not make sense. "Between" is definitely the problem; it could be swapped for "With" and the sentence would make sense. Re-draw those words.
Then, the new sentence is used.
Freedom of Speech
Not all actions have to be done with the word-substitution; in general, describing the macrocosmic plan that the players have ("We'll go to the temple of wisdom and try to find the statue of hate") can just be done. Similarly, talking to people, buying equipment, and the like is usually just possible. The word-substitution and die rolls should only be done to resolve conflicts; to resolve difficult conversations (that is, conversations which also have a threat/difficulty rating) the characters should be able to say "I talk about [nouns]" (or other sentences starting with "I talk about" or "I say that") without "Talk" or "About" (or "Say" or "Speak" or "Convince", and so on) being substituted. The conflict-resolution system is generally only put in place once the players have a plan and something impedes the characters' attempt to carry it out.
Player Versus Player
If two or more players come into conflict, the player who is starting the conflict is treated as the threat. The threat level is determined by the Arbiter's decision on their attack's effectiveness. The other players need to try to overcome the threat or add to the threat if they want to contribute. If the threat is overcome, the defending player has won; otherwise the attacking player has won. What exactly results from that is the Arbiter's decision but should be related to what exactly the attacker intended.
Example of Play
John, Jane and Jayden are sitting down to play Noun: The Verbing. Jane is playing as the Arbiter, and she says that the world is a futuristic space setting with psychic powers. First, the three of them take the time to write down their words:
Noun
Verb
Name
Location
Adjective
Adverb
Preposition
Title
Ship
Go
Anna
Star
Large
Somewhat
To
Sir/Madam
Wall
Take
Tom
Mercury
Fast
Continually
With
Mr/Mrs
Gun
Attack
Frank
Uranus
Violent
Internally
By
Master/Miss
Floor
Throw
Lydia
Earth
Bad
Vaguely
From
Lord/Lady
Crystal
Get
Zoe
Pluto
Good
Alone
About
Baron/Baroness
Space
Hide
Charlie
Sun
Flexible
Truly
Through
Emperor/Empress
Hatch
Fly
Jamie
Mars
Hard
Overtly
Under
Duke/Duchess
Robot
Move
Ethan
Space
Dark
Slowly
On
King/Queen
System
Save
Mark
Neptune
Psychic
Apparently
Beside
Saint
Alien
Drop
Delilah
Venus
Effective
Fortunately
In
Archbishop
Pirate
Activate
Caiden
Jupiter
Strange
Exceptionally
Before
Commander
Fleet
Bypass
Brian
Saturn
Small
Persuasively
While
Sergeant
Mind
Undo
Fatima
Planet
Fatal
Mentally
Around
Captain
Knife
Cast
Hayley
Asteroid
Strong
Implicitly
Alongside
Doctor
Spanner
Make
Mycah
Moon
Great
Secretly
After
Professor
Supply
Stop
Gemma
Rebel
Shoot
Pete
Process
Pilot
Malachai
Medic
Jump
Sasha
Wire
Consume
Ariel
Guard
Sabotage
Lee
Metal
Taunt
Rachael
Clothing
Sell
David
Power
Repair
Sam
Fire
Swap
Rebekah
Food
Protect
Jessamyn
Commander
Give
Callum
Ammunition
Invert
Omar
Armour
Burn
Steve
Water
Heal
Gabriel
With this done, Jane chooses her opening sentence:
"The galaxy has long been [verbed] by [nouns] and [nouns]. There was [nouned adjective] in those times - but no more. [Article] [noun] has risen up, lead by someone known only as [Title] [Noun]. You must stop [pronoun] before all turns to [nouns]. [Pronoun] may only be stopped by [verbing] the five [nouns]."
She then draws cards: they are "burn", "ship", "spanner", "good", "system", "captain" "pirate", "gun", "go" and "hatch".
"The galaxy has long been burned by ships and spanners. There was goodness in those times - but no more. The system has risen up, lead by someone known only as Captain Pirate. You must stop them before all turns to guns. They may only be stopped by going the five hatches." She quickly realises this doesn't quite make sense, and changes the last sentence to say "They may only be stopped by going to the five hatches".
Then, she explains the situation that the sentence bears out: there was a time when the galaxy was a place where space explorers found new and exciting things every day, using their ships to travel to far off asteroids and clean away all the resources from them - "Burning them with ship and spanner", so to speak. An enigmatic group of conformists called The System have decided that humanity can no longer continue its exploration, and have united under Captain Pirate, whose real name is unknown. Fighting the captain directly is no easy feat - to do so requires that you explore deep inside their spaceship, passing through several doors to reach them. But you must do so, before everyone else looks to their guns...
The other two players make their characters. Jayden explains that their character, [Name], used to be a [noun], before an unfortunate [nouned verb] caused them to lose their [noun], which they fight against the captain to reclaim, [verbing] [nouns] to help them. They draw "Jessamyn", "System", "Drop", "Hatch", "Take" and "Spanner." Jessamyn used to be a system, before an unfortunate drop caused her to lose her hatch, which she fights against the captain to reclaim, taking spanners to help her. Jayden explains that Jessamyn used to be a part of the system, but due to some bad maneuvers by a spaceship pilot, her squad were dumped on the floor while guarding one of the hatches. She was kicked out after that, even though it wasn't her fault. She wants to bust through that hatch just to prove a point, and wields her trusty spanner to help her.
Joe then presents his character: [Name] used to work for [nouned adjective], which was an important principle to [pronoun], but now that Captain Pirate threatens that, [pronoun] wields [pronoun's] trusty [noun] [adverb] to stop him. He draws "Hayley", "Flexible", "Knife" and "Continually". Hayley used to work for flexibility, which was an important principle to her, but now that Captain Pirate threatens that, she wields her trusty knife continually to stop him. He explains that his character believes that it's important that humans be able to adapt to anything - that is, be flexible - and that the System threatens their ability to do so with their radical conformism. Hayley's weapon of choice needs little explanation, and she never puts the damn thing down.
Then, they can begin playing. The first conflict is trying to get onto Captain Pirate's ship. Jane explains:
"On your way to Captain Pirate's ship, a group of [nouns] tries to [verb] you!"
She draws "System" and "Repair". Obviously, she explains, this is a group of members of The System who are trying to "Fix" you to become conformist using their psychic powers. She decides this is somewhat threatening, and assigns it a threat level of 5.
Jayden and Joe can act in either order. Joe decides first. "Hayley will [verb] [article] [noun] [preposition] [noun] [adverb]." He draws "Shoot" "Fleet" "Under" "Crystal" "Alone": Hayley will shoot the fleet under a crystal alone.
He explains that clearly, Hayley is setting up a psychic crystal to defend against their psychic attacks, and standing away from Jessamyn so the enemy can't attack them both at once, and using superior firepower to attack the enemy. Jane thinks this is a good and inventive explanation, worth 4 points of effectiveness.
Jayden says that Jessamyn will just [verb] [article] [noun], and draws "Bypass" and "Ship". Jessamyn takes control of their own craft and tries to avoid the enemy. Jess accepts this as a reasonable solution, worth 3 points.
The players then roll their 7 dice, and Jane rolls her 5. They both roll a total of 23, so the players just manage to defeat the threat, making it a little further towards the ship of Captain Pirate...
That's All, Folks!
Yes, this system is dumb. I hope it's fun, though. That's all that matters, right? Wrong, but close enough. Enjoy!