Steampunkette
2017-06-26, 01:44 PM
Foreword
This thread is meant to be a serious discussion
about the social reactions and ethical considerations
of using Enchantment Effects in a standard fantasy
setting for personal gain and a somewhat broader
touchstone of rape culture in D&D. If this makes
you uncomfortable, I apologize in advance.
TWs: Abuse, Sexual Assault, Violence
1) Outlining the Problem
In the game Dungeons and Dragons there are a finite number of ways to solve the problems provided by a DM within the framework of the rules. Generally speaking the player's choice will involve subterfuge, violence, social grace, or direct manipulation via enchantment. An example situation might include getting past a guard at a gate. They could kill him, or render him unconscious, they could sneak past or attempt to bribe him. Or they could use an Enchantment Spell to force his compliance, render him unconscious, or distract him so that they can slip past.
There has been much discussion of the tendency of players to engage full Murder-Hobo, and the appropriate DM response for such an issue, but as things slip into the more Mystical there's been less discussion on the matter with the rough presumption that Enchantment just "Works" with very little if any repercussions provided at a later date.
But within, say, Faerun there would certainly be such repercussions. The setting has been so highly magical that evil wizards from the lands of Thay were able to open up Mystical Enclaves where they sold magic items to people but specifically would not sell items used for large scale destruction, with the example being a Wand of Fireball, or items that could easily be used for criminal purposes, like a Wand of Charm Person. Clearly they understand that a person might use an Enchantment spell to commit a crime, at the least...
But it also implies that there's an understanding that spells like Charm Person exist. Where a person's actions might be excused while under the effect of an Enchantment spell. After all, they had no control over themselves while Dominated by the Mind Flayer and could not be held responsible for the things they were forced to do before the Illithid was destroyed, no?
And if a person lacks Control, they must similarly lack Consent within the eyes of the Law.
But how does this impact characterization, gameplay, story, and the consequences of a character's actions?
2) Discussing the Acts and Circumstances
The first thing we must consider in this discussion are the Acts themselves and the circumstances in which they occur. So let's look at the most common spells which affect people's control over themselves.
Cantrips: Friends
The Friends spell temporarily gives you advantage on social skill checks against the target. The spell lists that the target cannot be hostile toward you at the outset, but immediately -becomes- hostile afterward. This hostility is not a compulsion effect, as the spell has ended, and is open ended with no set duration. This is our first glimpse into the "Truth" of enchantment effects, that they temporarily strip control and consent but do not somehow mollify the target's emotional or psychological trauma at having that control taken away.
That isn't to say the spell cannot be used for good. Far from it, in fact, when the Warlock or Bard uses the Friends spell to convince the cultist guarding the soon-to-be-sacrificed townsfolk to release said townsfolk into her custody, avoiding violence and possible loss of innocent life. But one must judge the circumstances appropriately, as using it to convince a stingy merchant to sell you an important item for someone else's safety at a significant discount serves only to limit the amount of money you spend at the cost of stripping away another person's free will.
1st level spells: Charm Person, Command
Charm Person is perhaps the earliest and most available of these somewhat dangerous spells. While Friends lasts only a minute and simply grants advantage to convincing a person of something, Charm Person directly alters your target's priorities. Suddenly you are a warmly regarded friend, someone the target would never think to harm in any serious manner. Someone they'd help out if they could. This spell may seem innocuous, but it faces many of the same issues as Friends with an extended duration, up to an hour, and a much more loose interpretation of what it can do.
Certainly a Charm Person spell can get you out of a spot of trouble by making the Orc Chieftain view you as an ally rather than an enemy. But it could also be used in a Tavern to violate people's consent much more cheaply and effectively than spending a bunch of gold on expensive drinks... Someone who will remember you charmed them, after the fact.
Command seems much simpler. Much easier. Because of its limited command options and short duration the ethical considerations seem tiny. Until you command someone to "Drop" their baby. Or the rope supporting the rest of their adventuring company. Imagine the soul-destroying guilt that would come from such an act, even being aware that someone else compelled the act, you were the one who dropped your friends/lover/child/etc to their doom...
2nd level spells: Calm Emotions, Hold Person, Suggestion
Calm Emotions seems like a no-brainer in its ethical considerations. You're not -really- harming someone, you're just calming them down. Breaking Charm and Frighten effects even seems pretty noble, to be honest! But... it can also change how the target feels about others. Rendering them Neutral to someone they're Hostile towards. And while it can be used to save an innocent life, it can also Gaslight the heck out of a character by making them no longer angry at someone who has done something harmful to them, and with successive casts and appropriately manipulating conversation be used to cause someone to question their emotions completely...
Hold Person is, perhaps, the most existentially frightening Enchantment spell below the power of Domination effects. You become a prisoner in your own body on someone else's command. You can't even move to defend yourself. A form of paralysis so complete as to render you helpless without the associated numbness and unawareness of surroundings. If the spell rendered your body numb to sensation you would simply collapse, like any person suffering medical paralysis. Instead you are forced to remain still as other people harm you, feeling everything and unable to do anything about it. While typically used in Combat, which is a horrifying prospect as you're forced to allow people to tear you apart, it could easily be used in other venues to horrid effect.
The Suggestion spell is, similar to Command, insidious in its abuses. The example given in the book is to command a knight to give her horse to the first beggar she sees within 8 hours. But it could just as easily be used to strip a person's consent to sexual activity, force them to commit murder, or even put them into a situation of particularly precarious survival. But even at it's kindest and least vile use, you're still using a spell that compels a person to act independent of what they want. To give away their possessions or act as your messenger or other servant.
4th level spells: Compulsion
Perhaps the least offensive of the Enchantment effects, Compulsion forces the target to move in a direction horizontal to yourself. It still compels the person to expend themselves suiting your whims of where they should stand or go like the Pied Piper of Hamlin, but at least it doesn't open itself up to other more psychologically damaging options. Still, being forced to walk away while someone you care about is being harmed, even if you're able to scream and cry and beg for someone to help them, is something that would likely cause serious psychological trauma.
5th level spells: Dominate Person, Modify Memory
And here we have earliest entries into the most truly terrifying spells available... Dominate Person being the first. With this spell, you can force a target into complete compliance with your wishes by making demands the target must fulfill, or by taking direct Psychic control over the person's body to force their actions directly. There may be situations where this spell could cause more good than harm, perhaps by forcing the leader of a band of marauders to tell his men to cease their pillaging and plunder. But the less savory versions and the psychological trauma it will cause likely outweigh any potential positive use of this spell. To completely lose control of yourself, forced to comply with someone else's edicts without even the ability to -attempt- resistance... Truly a horrific spell.
Modify Memory is the Gaslighter's perfect spell. It doesn't physically cause any damage, but it allows you to completely rewrite your target's perception of an event in the past 24 hours. It also has the ability to enhance a memory that already exists, which is certainly useful for consenting individuals to try and recover important details of some event... It's a spell that certainly has ethical and unethical uses.
8th level spells: Feeblemind
The Ethical considerations of rendering someone's mental state into that of near-catatonia, incapable of understanding language or even remembering one's self for extremely extended periods of time are very simple: You have essentially murdered the person and left his body moving around in a nearly helpless state. The only saving grace of this spell, if it can be called that, is in the chance that the target might recover their mind at the end of each month after the casting of the spell. This spell should be reserved for Villains and for Governmental use on irredeemable criminals when they consider Death to be a step too far...
There are some spells I didn't list, here. Tasha's Laughter or the Sleep spell, for example. These spells have fairly limited ability to be abused in a psychologically damaging manner or to compromise a person's consent. These spells were left aside in favor of a more narrow approach to direct toward the core topic. Other spells, like Mass Suggestion and Dominate Monster, were left out simply because they were just expansions on the power of already mentioned spells to allow them to target more creatures, more variety of creatures, or extend the duration.
Of note, spells like Dominate Beast were left out because animals are typically not viewed with in the same social lens as people, not out of dismissal of validity.
3) Consequences
What are the likely repercussions of these acts in transgression? For several of them, Hold Person for example, the repercussions will be short-lived as the person experiencing them will almost certainly be killed by the caster of the spell and their allies. But some of them have much longer lasting implications.
A character who has been dominated, for example, is very likely to have experienced some deep psychological trauma, even if the actions they were forced to perform seem fairly mundane. A man forced to walk across the room and stare at the corner while the spell's caster goes about their business in the room is entirely likely to experience an existential crisis or psychotic breakdown as he struggles to turn, to move, to do anything but can't control himself. It's certainly true that he won't feel nearly as much trauma as a man forced to stand by and watch his loved ones be tortured to death, unable to intervene. Or as much trauma as a man forced to perform sexual acts. But the trauma will still be there.
This remains true throughout any of the above listed spells. Even the simple "Command" spell with its short-term compulsion to simply prostrate one's self, for example, is likely to chip away at a person's sense of personal autonomy in body and in thought.
Alongside the trauma comes anger, pain, doubt, fear, and many other emotions that might result in a person reacting or lashing out. Characters who have suffered humiliating lapses of control might lash out at authority figures or may become subservient for fear that noncompliance might result in another complete loss of control. Violence and harm, internalized or externalized, are likely to be common as people test their control over themselves and others. Someone who may have been forced to harm themselves, or to allow harm to come to themselves, may seek out further harm under their own directives, on their own terms, or simply to relive the experience as closely as they can in order to understand it, and their feelings, better.
Use the concept of trauma to determine the victim's future actions and outlook. They may even seek to become a powerful Enchanter in order to inflict that control on others as a way to gain a misguided sense of personal control, spreading the harm farther.
4) Societal Response
Any society which has existed in a world where this type of magic exists for more than a few generations has, very likely, seen every possible permutation on the magic's various abuses. From Charming bar wenches into midnight orgies or Charming Bar Wenches fishing for better tips, every aspect of these abuses is likely to be catalogued in some record of criminal activity and the recognition of loss of control and consent is likely to be in place. In the Forgotten Realms, for example, magical coercion into sexual acts is likely viewed as particularly vile form of rape and punished as such.
Divination spells and some Enchantments, such as Circle of Truth, are likely to be employed in ferreting out the truth of the matter, should an accusation be levied. Particularly when it comes to Philanderers and Adulterers claiming to be enchanted to assuage their spouse's wrath at their cheating ways. More to the point, however, is the social response.
Social response is likely to be weighted fairly heavily in favor of the Wealthy or the Titled, and fairly heavily against the Wanderer and Recluse. An Adventurer known for being an Enchanter is likely to be viewed as a dangerous criminal threat, while the local noble who uses Charm Spells to loosen up the common girls will be given a nigh infinite number of free passes on his abuse so long as his victims are politically powerless.
Similarly, such spells when used against lower members of society, or enemies aggressive to the society, are very likely to be viewed as, at worst, socially acceptable. Using Dominate Monster to force the Orcish Horde's pet Hill Giant to crush their forces the orcish leader under a greatclub is liable to be lauded as a noble use of the spell. Even if one were to use Modify Memory to engage in a rewriting of an enemy's recent history to force compliance would be seen as acceptable, I'm sure.
But that still places the Enchanter about town in a precarious position. People who have been Charmed or Dominated, Suggested or Commanded, are very unlikely to have anything to do with such a person. Those in power who have felt such horrible effects, or seen their results upon the common folk, are likely to scrutinize every act for signs of mystical compulsion. And even a spurious accusation is liable to hold far more weight in such a case...
Warlocks are often viewed with disdain for those the serve. Enchanters should often be viewed with disdain for those who have abused the same power. An Evoker may be able to blow up a village, but an Enchanter will leave the whole town alive and psychologically scarred...
5) Dealing with "That Player"
At some point or another you may be forced to deal with "That Player". The player who has no consideration of the consequences of using Enchantment effects. One who argues "At least I didn't kill her!" when confronted with the moral and ethical implications of their actions, or who has no issue using Suggestion on another PC to get his way. So to try and help you deal with "That Player" in advance, here are some helpful tips and guidelines.
1) Table Rule. One of the most important discussions at a table typically revolves around PvP as it's likely to happen to nearly any group at least once or twice. Many groups have an open policy on PvP so long as it's left on the table, which works for many groups and if it works for you that's great! But I've found that at a table with That Player it's best to make a table rule about using enchantments to affect other party members and have the rule be "Never." I have seen female gamers leave tables permanently when some That Player uses Charm and Dominate to rape their character because he thinks it's funny. This is the last thing the hobby needs: Less players.
2) The neutral approach. Allow That Player to dig their own proverbial grave. After the act of rape is finished ask That Player what their intent is "After raping (NPC Name/Gender goes here)". Do not sugar coat it. Do not vilify That Player for doing it. State it as a matter of fact almost in passing, but have the victim's response in mind. The same goes for otherwise stripping a person's autonomy away. A character who is Held, defenseless, and is cut down is fairly clearly Murdered, after all.
3) If the table has players who are squeamish or uncomfortable with such acts, or with the idea of their character being called a rapist for committing an act of rape, feel free to enact House or Table rules of conduct that keep such things from happening. The Neutral Approach will often lead to this step, which gives you the chance to discuss the ethical ramifications and make appropriate changes to the story to handle the discomfort.
4) If all else fails, deal with it appropriately. A person who routinely uses Enchantment effects on monsters to stop their attacks is probably going to be treated with praise among friends and immediate bodily harm amongst enemies. An Enchanter in a town should likely be shunned to some degree. Perhaps approached by criminal elements of society hoping to make use of their talents, or otherwise exposed to the results of their actions.
Regardless of which methods you use, it's always good to truly look at the circumstances revolving around this ethically questionable use of magic.
And if anyone else has rules or suggestions for how players and DMs can deal with these sorts of issues, please feel free to post them, here!
This thread is meant to be a serious discussion
about the social reactions and ethical considerations
of using Enchantment Effects in a standard fantasy
setting for personal gain and a somewhat broader
touchstone of rape culture in D&D. If this makes
you uncomfortable, I apologize in advance.
TWs: Abuse, Sexual Assault, Violence
1) Outlining the Problem
In the game Dungeons and Dragons there are a finite number of ways to solve the problems provided by a DM within the framework of the rules. Generally speaking the player's choice will involve subterfuge, violence, social grace, or direct manipulation via enchantment. An example situation might include getting past a guard at a gate. They could kill him, or render him unconscious, they could sneak past or attempt to bribe him. Or they could use an Enchantment Spell to force his compliance, render him unconscious, or distract him so that they can slip past.
There has been much discussion of the tendency of players to engage full Murder-Hobo, and the appropriate DM response for such an issue, but as things slip into the more Mystical there's been less discussion on the matter with the rough presumption that Enchantment just "Works" with very little if any repercussions provided at a later date.
But within, say, Faerun there would certainly be such repercussions. The setting has been so highly magical that evil wizards from the lands of Thay were able to open up Mystical Enclaves where they sold magic items to people but specifically would not sell items used for large scale destruction, with the example being a Wand of Fireball, or items that could easily be used for criminal purposes, like a Wand of Charm Person. Clearly they understand that a person might use an Enchantment spell to commit a crime, at the least...
But it also implies that there's an understanding that spells like Charm Person exist. Where a person's actions might be excused while under the effect of an Enchantment spell. After all, they had no control over themselves while Dominated by the Mind Flayer and could not be held responsible for the things they were forced to do before the Illithid was destroyed, no?
And if a person lacks Control, they must similarly lack Consent within the eyes of the Law.
But how does this impact characterization, gameplay, story, and the consequences of a character's actions?
2) Discussing the Acts and Circumstances
The first thing we must consider in this discussion are the Acts themselves and the circumstances in which they occur. So let's look at the most common spells which affect people's control over themselves.
Cantrips: Friends
The Friends spell temporarily gives you advantage on social skill checks against the target. The spell lists that the target cannot be hostile toward you at the outset, but immediately -becomes- hostile afterward. This hostility is not a compulsion effect, as the spell has ended, and is open ended with no set duration. This is our first glimpse into the "Truth" of enchantment effects, that they temporarily strip control and consent but do not somehow mollify the target's emotional or psychological trauma at having that control taken away.
That isn't to say the spell cannot be used for good. Far from it, in fact, when the Warlock or Bard uses the Friends spell to convince the cultist guarding the soon-to-be-sacrificed townsfolk to release said townsfolk into her custody, avoiding violence and possible loss of innocent life. But one must judge the circumstances appropriately, as using it to convince a stingy merchant to sell you an important item for someone else's safety at a significant discount serves only to limit the amount of money you spend at the cost of stripping away another person's free will.
1st level spells: Charm Person, Command
Charm Person is perhaps the earliest and most available of these somewhat dangerous spells. While Friends lasts only a minute and simply grants advantage to convincing a person of something, Charm Person directly alters your target's priorities. Suddenly you are a warmly regarded friend, someone the target would never think to harm in any serious manner. Someone they'd help out if they could. This spell may seem innocuous, but it faces many of the same issues as Friends with an extended duration, up to an hour, and a much more loose interpretation of what it can do.
Certainly a Charm Person spell can get you out of a spot of trouble by making the Orc Chieftain view you as an ally rather than an enemy. But it could also be used in a Tavern to violate people's consent much more cheaply and effectively than spending a bunch of gold on expensive drinks... Someone who will remember you charmed them, after the fact.
Command seems much simpler. Much easier. Because of its limited command options and short duration the ethical considerations seem tiny. Until you command someone to "Drop" their baby. Or the rope supporting the rest of their adventuring company. Imagine the soul-destroying guilt that would come from such an act, even being aware that someone else compelled the act, you were the one who dropped your friends/lover/child/etc to their doom...
2nd level spells: Calm Emotions, Hold Person, Suggestion
Calm Emotions seems like a no-brainer in its ethical considerations. You're not -really- harming someone, you're just calming them down. Breaking Charm and Frighten effects even seems pretty noble, to be honest! But... it can also change how the target feels about others. Rendering them Neutral to someone they're Hostile towards. And while it can be used to save an innocent life, it can also Gaslight the heck out of a character by making them no longer angry at someone who has done something harmful to them, and with successive casts and appropriately manipulating conversation be used to cause someone to question their emotions completely...
Hold Person is, perhaps, the most existentially frightening Enchantment spell below the power of Domination effects. You become a prisoner in your own body on someone else's command. You can't even move to defend yourself. A form of paralysis so complete as to render you helpless without the associated numbness and unawareness of surroundings. If the spell rendered your body numb to sensation you would simply collapse, like any person suffering medical paralysis. Instead you are forced to remain still as other people harm you, feeling everything and unable to do anything about it. While typically used in Combat, which is a horrifying prospect as you're forced to allow people to tear you apart, it could easily be used in other venues to horrid effect.
The Suggestion spell is, similar to Command, insidious in its abuses. The example given in the book is to command a knight to give her horse to the first beggar she sees within 8 hours. But it could just as easily be used to strip a person's consent to sexual activity, force them to commit murder, or even put them into a situation of particularly precarious survival. But even at it's kindest and least vile use, you're still using a spell that compels a person to act independent of what they want. To give away their possessions or act as your messenger or other servant.
4th level spells: Compulsion
Perhaps the least offensive of the Enchantment effects, Compulsion forces the target to move in a direction horizontal to yourself. It still compels the person to expend themselves suiting your whims of where they should stand or go like the Pied Piper of Hamlin, but at least it doesn't open itself up to other more psychologically damaging options. Still, being forced to walk away while someone you care about is being harmed, even if you're able to scream and cry and beg for someone to help them, is something that would likely cause serious psychological trauma.
5th level spells: Dominate Person, Modify Memory
And here we have earliest entries into the most truly terrifying spells available... Dominate Person being the first. With this spell, you can force a target into complete compliance with your wishes by making demands the target must fulfill, or by taking direct Psychic control over the person's body to force their actions directly. There may be situations where this spell could cause more good than harm, perhaps by forcing the leader of a band of marauders to tell his men to cease their pillaging and plunder. But the less savory versions and the psychological trauma it will cause likely outweigh any potential positive use of this spell. To completely lose control of yourself, forced to comply with someone else's edicts without even the ability to -attempt- resistance... Truly a horrific spell.
Modify Memory is the Gaslighter's perfect spell. It doesn't physically cause any damage, but it allows you to completely rewrite your target's perception of an event in the past 24 hours. It also has the ability to enhance a memory that already exists, which is certainly useful for consenting individuals to try and recover important details of some event... It's a spell that certainly has ethical and unethical uses.
8th level spells: Feeblemind
The Ethical considerations of rendering someone's mental state into that of near-catatonia, incapable of understanding language or even remembering one's self for extremely extended periods of time are very simple: You have essentially murdered the person and left his body moving around in a nearly helpless state. The only saving grace of this spell, if it can be called that, is in the chance that the target might recover their mind at the end of each month after the casting of the spell. This spell should be reserved for Villains and for Governmental use on irredeemable criminals when they consider Death to be a step too far...
There are some spells I didn't list, here. Tasha's Laughter or the Sleep spell, for example. These spells have fairly limited ability to be abused in a psychologically damaging manner or to compromise a person's consent. These spells were left aside in favor of a more narrow approach to direct toward the core topic. Other spells, like Mass Suggestion and Dominate Monster, were left out simply because they were just expansions on the power of already mentioned spells to allow them to target more creatures, more variety of creatures, or extend the duration.
Of note, spells like Dominate Beast were left out because animals are typically not viewed with in the same social lens as people, not out of dismissal of validity.
3) Consequences
What are the likely repercussions of these acts in transgression? For several of them, Hold Person for example, the repercussions will be short-lived as the person experiencing them will almost certainly be killed by the caster of the spell and their allies. But some of them have much longer lasting implications.
A character who has been dominated, for example, is very likely to have experienced some deep psychological trauma, even if the actions they were forced to perform seem fairly mundane. A man forced to walk across the room and stare at the corner while the spell's caster goes about their business in the room is entirely likely to experience an existential crisis or psychotic breakdown as he struggles to turn, to move, to do anything but can't control himself. It's certainly true that he won't feel nearly as much trauma as a man forced to stand by and watch his loved ones be tortured to death, unable to intervene. Or as much trauma as a man forced to perform sexual acts. But the trauma will still be there.
This remains true throughout any of the above listed spells. Even the simple "Command" spell with its short-term compulsion to simply prostrate one's self, for example, is likely to chip away at a person's sense of personal autonomy in body and in thought.
Alongside the trauma comes anger, pain, doubt, fear, and many other emotions that might result in a person reacting or lashing out. Characters who have suffered humiliating lapses of control might lash out at authority figures or may become subservient for fear that noncompliance might result in another complete loss of control. Violence and harm, internalized or externalized, are likely to be common as people test their control over themselves and others. Someone who may have been forced to harm themselves, or to allow harm to come to themselves, may seek out further harm under their own directives, on their own terms, or simply to relive the experience as closely as they can in order to understand it, and their feelings, better.
Use the concept of trauma to determine the victim's future actions and outlook. They may even seek to become a powerful Enchanter in order to inflict that control on others as a way to gain a misguided sense of personal control, spreading the harm farther.
4) Societal Response
Any society which has existed in a world where this type of magic exists for more than a few generations has, very likely, seen every possible permutation on the magic's various abuses. From Charming bar wenches into midnight orgies or Charming Bar Wenches fishing for better tips, every aspect of these abuses is likely to be catalogued in some record of criminal activity and the recognition of loss of control and consent is likely to be in place. In the Forgotten Realms, for example, magical coercion into sexual acts is likely viewed as particularly vile form of rape and punished as such.
Divination spells and some Enchantments, such as Circle of Truth, are likely to be employed in ferreting out the truth of the matter, should an accusation be levied. Particularly when it comes to Philanderers and Adulterers claiming to be enchanted to assuage their spouse's wrath at their cheating ways. More to the point, however, is the social response.
Social response is likely to be weighted fairly heavily in favor of the Wealthy or the Titled, and fairly heavily against the Wanderer and Recluse. An Adventurer known for being an Enchanter is likely to be viewed as a dangerous criminal threat, while the local noble who uses Charm Spells to loosen up the common girls will be given a nigh infinite number of free passes on his abuse so long as his victims are politically powerless.
Similarly, such spells when used against lower members of society, or enemies aggressive to the society, are very likely to be viewed as, at worst, socially acceptable. Using Dominate Monster to force the Orcish Horde's pet Hill Giant to crush their forces the orcish leader under a greatclub is liable to be lauded as a noble use of the spell. Even if one were to use Modify Memory to engage in a rewriting of an enemy's recent history to force compliance would be seen as acceptable, I'm sure.
But that still places the Enchanter about town in a precarious position. People who have been Charmed or Dominated, Suggested or Commanded, are very unlikely to have anything to do with such a person. Those in power who have felt such horrible effects, or seen their results upon the common folk, are likely to scrutinize every act for signs of mystical compulsion. And even a spurious accusation is liable to hold far more weight in such a case...
Warlocks are often viewed with disdain for those the serve. Enchanters should often be viewed with disdain for those who have abused the same power. An Evoker may be able to blow up a village, but an Enchanter will leave the whole town alive and psychologically scarred...
5) Dealing with "That Player"
At some point or another you may be forced to deal with "That Player". The player who has no consideration of the consequences of using Enchantment effects. One who argues "At least I didn't kill her!" when confronted with the moral and ethical implications of their actions, or who has no issue using Suggestion on another PC to get his way. So to try and help you deal with "That Player" in advance, here are some helpful tips and guidelines.
1) Table Rule. One of the most important discussions at a table typically revolves around PvP as it's likely to happen to nearly any group at least once or twice. Many groups have an open policy on PvP so long as it's left on the table, which works for many groups and if it works for you that's great! But I've found that at a table with That Player it's best to make a table rule about using enchantments to affect other party members and have the rule be "Never." I have seen female gamers leave tables permanently when some That Player uses Charm and Dominate to rape their character because he thinks it's funny. This is the last thing the hobby needs: Less players.
2) The neutral approach. Allow That Player to dig their own proverbial grave. After the act of rape is finished ask That Player what their intent is "After raping (NPC Name/Gender goes here)". Do not sugar coat it. Do not vilify That Player for doing it. State it as a matter of fact almost in passing, but have the victim's response in mind. The same goes for otherwise stripping a person's autonomy away. A character who is Held, defenseless, and is cut down is fairly clearly Murdered, after all.
3) If the table has players who are squeamish or uncomfortable with such acts, or with the idea of their character being called a rapist for committing an act of rape, feel free to enact House or Table rules of conduct that keep such things from happening. The Neutral Approach will often lead to this step, which gives you the chance to discuss the ethical ramifications and make appropriate changes to the story to handle the discomfort.
4) If all else fails, deal with it appropriately. A person who routinely uses Enchantment effects on monsters to stop their attacks is probably going to be treated with praise among friends and immediate bodily harm amongst enemies. An Enchanter in a town should likely be shunned to some degree. Perhaps approached by criminal elements of society hoping to make use of their talents, or otherwise exposed to the results of their actions.
Regardless of which methods you use, it's always good to truly look at the circumstances revolving around this ethically questionable use of magic.
And if anyone else has rules or suggestions for how players and DMs can deal with these sorts of issues, please feel free to post them, here!