The Evils of Pokemon...

[Thrivol]

You begin as a ten year old kid.
You capture monsters by beating them into a pulp and then putting them into a tiny ball.
You force the pokemon you capture to fight other pokemon.
You force the pokemon to evolve.
Pokemon you have, beyond the six in your pocket at all times, are stored in a box.


List more!

[Dallas-Dakota]

6 They make little kids watch it all.

[ufo]

I've always thought PokeMon was cruel. You beat animals senseless and capture them against their will and force them to fight. It's against the law in most countries, but PokéMon is shown on television in said countries.

[Magioth]

you train them to beat up other childrens pokemon to steal the childs money.

[Leather_Book_Wizard]

8. There are to many.
9. You "gotta catch 'em all." It advocates greed.:smallbiggrin:
10. You leave home at ten and like never go back.

[Pyro]

11. You give them power stones so they can "bulkup".

[Arang]

You can force feed your Pokemon "stimulants".
You usually have to go into people's houses and take their stuff to progress at least once per game.
The rarer the Pokemon you take out of its natural habitat and force into a life of violence, the more Pokecred you get.

[Ichneumon]

You never knock on doors, you just bump into other people's houses.

You breed pokemon, it gives children a wrong idea of nature that different species can make vertile offspring.

[Vonriel]

You're encouraged to go into a wildlife preserve and hunt rare species.

[Saithis Bladewing]

Surely this belongs in Gaming (Other) or Media Discussions?

You as a trainer are knocked out by your opponent's pokemon if you lose and they take your stuff, but this seems to be a normal everyday thing after all.

You stick your Pokemon into tiny little cramped balls when you're not using them.

[Belteshazzar]

They eat the Pokemon. I mean really have you ever seen a creature that was not a Pokemon? Where do they get meat? It's either Marinated Bulbasaur or Solyent Green?

[Gaelbert]

You use the pokemon as work animals, swim, rock climb, cut, fly.
How exactly can a 100+ lb. person fly on a bird that's weighs less than one pound?

[Fishies]

You use the pokemon as work animals, swim, rock climb, cut, fly.
How exactly can a 100+ lb. person fly on a bird that's weighs less than one pound?

My Smeargle can Fly, Surf, Waterfall, and Defog. It's a frikkin' dog.

[Lykan]

Not sure if this is the right thread, but... Something I never really understood with pokemon... There's an evil team in every one, but as soon as you beat a member, they either dissipear or leave you alone.

For people so involved in plots to take over the world, you think they'd give their members... Err... Weapons of sorts.

Another evil of pokemon is that the television show gives you siezures. >.>

[Eldpollard]

There is a whole league designed to see who can hurt creatures the most. The pokemon are in airtight balls.

[Magioth]

you purposly fight fire against grass to purposely cause more pain to other pokemon

[The_Werebear]

Not sure if this is the right thread, but... Something I never really understood with pokemon... There's an evil team in every one, but as soon as you beat a member, they either dissipear or leave you alone.

For people so involved in plots to take over the world, you think they'd give their members... Err... Weapons of sorts.

Another evil of pokemon is that the television show gives you siezures. >.>

This (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=235) and This (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=242)

You expose your pokemon to hazardous radiation to make them mutate rapidly.
You expose your pokemon to mind warping machines to make them produce bizarre elemental effects.

[reorith]

i feel bad about defeating the junior trainers, bug catchers, lasses, school kids and the other little kids with their low level pokemon. it just seemed so "boo yeah! i just beat up your only friend. what now punk? what now?

and it seemed as if the swimmers, the rangers, gym leaders, black belts, teachers, sailors, engineers, hikers and the like should have moved on and stopped battling pokemon after the age of twelve...

[averagejoe]

This (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=235) and This (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=242)

Don't forget This (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=1). Actually, this point has been brought up several times before on this thread.

[Athanatos]

Don't forget This (http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=1). Actually, this point has been brought up several times before on this thread.

And of course this (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/05/28).


and it seemed as if the swimmers, the rangers, gym leaders, black belts, teachers, sailors, engineers, hikers and the like should have moved on and stopped battling pokemon after the age of twelve...

Dude. There's a huge difference between playing Pokemon games on your DS and actually owning a Pokemon. If you told me that I could capture a frickin' dragon, keep it in a ball, and have it come out and kick some ass for me whenever I wanted it to, there's no way in hell I'd "move on".

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

With the increase in humanoid pokemon in the games, it also encourages slavery. The various evil teams bring vigilanteism to mind, and the Game Corners, where you must gamble or buy enough coins to BUY certain breeds of pokemon, encourage gambling.

Ditto alone encourages adultery. Well, through the uses I put Ditto to, anyway.

[SurlySeraph]

Ditto alone encourages adultery. Well, through the uses I put Ditto to, anyway.

I - I don't have the slightest idea of what you meant by that, and I absolutely do not want to know.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

I keep Ditto perpetually suspended in the fertility-field of the Day Care on Pokemon Silver, routinely sticking in new pokemon for the amount of time necessary to produce an egg, then switching to another.

I know what you were thinking, and quite honestly I thought of it as I typed that. It's hilariously sick but, genetically speaking thanks to Ditto's unique powers, completely possible. :smallamused:

[Drider]

I keep Ditto perpetually suspended in the fertility-field

Ditto's "unique" powers. :smallamused:

:amused: does it have to impersonate just pokemon its seen, or can it also "become" people?

[SurlySeraph]

Okay. That could have been worse. That definitely could have been worse. My uncooperative, deeply damaged mind is making it worse through no fault of my own. Looks like I won't have to track you down for snapping my fragile little mind like a twig, after all. But then, how would I track you down if my mind had snapped? Does having an internal dialogue like this, much less typing it out for the whole world to see, indicate that my mind has already snapped?




I think I'm going to go have some pie. Pie makes everything better. *whimper*

[reorith]

Dude. There's a huge difference between playing Pokemon games on your DS and actually owning a Pokemon. If you told me that I could capture a frickin' dragon, keep it in a ball, and have it come out and kick some ass for me whenever I wanted it to, there's no way in hell I'd "move on".

i mean they should be working or doing something legitimate instead of accosting ten year old girls.

yeah i always played as a female character from crystal on. so what?

[[Insert Neat Username Here]]

They should be working or doing something legitimate instead of accosting ten year old girls.

That is the most disturbing post in the entire thread.

[Leper_Kahn]

On top of it all... My friends like the games... *Facepalm*

[Gaelbert]

This and (http://www.awkwardzombie.com/comic1-061807.php) this and (http://www.awkwardzombie.com/comic1-062507.php) this. (http://www.awkwardzombie.com/comic1-060407.php)

[Ranis]

When you beat said fellow trainers, it is customary to take their money and break their soul to the point to where they not only will no longer battle you, but they will only say a one-line phrase over and over again.

Even WoW hasn't gotten that bad.

Yet.

[Thexare Blademoon]

i mean they should be working or doing something legitimate instead of accosting ten year old girls.

Well, it does bring in decent amounts of money.

[SurlySeraph]

original post deleted

Er... we are joking, you know. We are saying these things for our own amusement, not seriously.


original post deleted

We've had polls about how many people here play D&D. There are fewer than you'd think (though the majority obviously are D&D players). And again, this is not lame because it is a joke. Well, maybe it's a lame joke, but the point is that it's a joke.


original post deleted

Well, I think that that's rather healthy and nature for the target audience of Pokemon (namely, kids who are younger than, say, 12).

[SkanMan]

dude, surly, chill on it. I too am capable of this humor thing, i found it comical to rip on you guys, trust me, i have my nerdy moments, i dont frequently play D&D, tho i have and know how, but yo, quiz me on star wars trivia I pwn n00bz!

[SkanMan]

and for the record....


If dittos existed im not sure i would turn it away if i was feeling...curious..




lol

:smallwink:

[PlatinumJester]

Why do the pokemon in the TV series befriend their tomentors who beat the **** out of them before enslaving them in their balls and then making them fight other pokemon for gambling purposes. If I was Pikachu I would have hve sent 40,000 volts of thunder up Ash's qrse and run away by now.

[Gaelbert]

That's what Pikachu did at the very beginning of the shows, but for some reason he/she/it stayed with Ash, even though Pikachu hated him. How odd.

[SurlySeraph]

Pokemon grow to like and be reliant on their trainers. Sort of like Stockholm Syndrome.

[Raiser Blade]

Pokemon grow to like and be reliant on their trainers. Sort of like Stockholm Syndrome.

lol that was pretty darn funny

[Leliel]

People that actually belive this. They like fighting, and those pokeballs are actually geared to provide the maximum comfort to their tenants.

READ THE CANON, MORON(this is addesed to those people who are not joking. No offence to any one else)

[bosssmiley]

Pokemon? Evil? Oh yes (http://www222.pair.com/sjohn/pokethulhu.htm)!

You don't know true evil until you hear the dischordant piping song of the Jigglypolyp as it merrily carves the flesh of those it has driven mad! MAD! MAAAAAAAD!!! :smalleek:

[Xerillum]

Ten year old kids in a casino.
Ten year old kids mentally destroying school children.
Ten year old kids being sent from home to mentally destroy people.
Enslaving cute furry animals for the purposes of making money and winning medals.
Feeding pokemon steroids, or "Pokeblocks"
Coincedence? No. Pokemon games are the foul creations of the creations of..........

To be continued. Immediately. A partnership of microsoft, dell, and the Boy Scouts of America.

[Zeful]

I would like to point out that if these creatures were real, certain things like planes, tanks and cars wouldn't exist as 90% of the pokemon breeds can destroy these devices. Most lv. 5 pokemon could kill a full grown adult with little effort. The legendairies alone would crush most countries into the ground before nuclear weapons existed.

Another thing to point out is that if these creatures did exist, you wouldn't have any of these problems.

[zeratul]

Hehe, this is an amazing thread, keep it up guys!:smallbiggrin:

[SurlySeraph]

I would like to point out that if these creatures were real, certain things like planes, tanks and cars wouldn't exist as 90% of the pokemon breeds can destroy these devices. Most lv. 5 pokemon could kill a full grown adult with little effort. The legendairies alone would crush most countries into the ground before nuclear weapons existed.

Another thing to point out is that if these creatures did exist, you wouldn't have any of these problems.

That reminds me of another one. Pokemon encourages children to join the military (Lt. Surge in Red and Blue mentioned how he was in the army). It also, paradoxically, encourages children to disrespect their elders, because most of the trainers are mature adults.

Oh, and it confuses children about physics and chemistry, by giving them ideas like "Fire beats steel." Fire has to be extremely hot to melt steel. Steel is not flammable. It doesn't work that way.

[AtomicKitKat]

Parents let their pre-teen girls travel around with pre-teen boys while chaperoned by a slitty-eyed, teenage(mid-20s?) lecher. Presumably because said lecher has a uniform and multiple-birth/clone fetish.

Oh, and the game encourages you to "blast off" cross-dressers.:smalltongue:

[Setra]

Ten year old kids in a casino. Personally, I'm jealous of this part. I used to live in Vegas when I was much younger.. never allowed in casinos... I love gambling.

Also, Mudkip, Bidoof, and Seaking.

[tannish2]

And of course this (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/05/28).



Dude. There's a huge difference between playing Pokemon games on your DS and actually owning a Pokemon. If you told me that I could capture a frickin' dragon, keep it in a ball, and have it come out and kick some ass for me whenever I wanted it to, there's no way in hell I'd "move on".

4 words: PETP (people for the ethical treatment of pokemon)