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NecroDancer
2017-09-18, 08:37 AM
Imagine how each class would fight a dragon.

A fighter/barbarian would charge in with their weapon ready.

A wizard/sorcerer would fling arcane power from a distance.

A cleric would draw upon the power of divinity itself.

A druid would unleash the fury of the natural world upon the dragon.

A ranger/paladin/gish would combine magic and sword against the dragon.

But a bard would just laugh and perform. The bard would dance with joy. They would sing their song. They would launch into a speech that shakes everyone to the core. The bard wouldn't fight the dragon, the bard would befriend it.

The bard isn't known for overwhelming magic or impossible swordsmanship. They are known for putting on their best smile and convincing people to follow them, to believe them, to help them. The bard doesn't need a weapon or spell to win, the bard just needs a few words.....

Lalliman
2017-09-18, 11:23 AM
Well of course someone named NecroDancer would like bards :smallbiggrin:

I personally find the bard to be the most out-of-place of classes. Not the basic concept of a bard, but the execution in D&D. Why is a character who uses magical music one of the core classes, alongside essential fantasy archetypes like the wizard and barbarian? The monk is often called out for being weirdly specific, but I find the bard to be much more so. It seems like it should've been either a non-magical class or a sorcerer archetype.

Contrary to you, it's probably the core class that I'm absolutely least likely to play.

Pleh
2017-09-18, 12:23 PM
What kind of conversation are we trying to have here?

Are we listening to an exhibition of your opinions?

Are we playing a game to test the veracity of your claims?

Is it an invitation to share opinions and spark general discussion?

Because any character of any class could happen to befriend a dragon. A bard could use diplomacy to make ANY dragon a friend, but they aren't necessarily the best at that. They could use bardic music, but dragon saves are usually strong enough the bard would have to be higher level or somewhat optimized to have consistent success with that (and ANY class could have better chances against an underpowered threat).

If a bard in my game thinks he's clever for befriending a dragon, he's likely to wind up as dragon chow.

LibraryOgre
2017-09-18, 01:23 PM
Those who are jealous of a bard's awesome quotient frequently dismiss them as "signing". Bards need not sing.

Bards can dance... and with Tumble and Improved Unarmed Strike, they are practicing Capoeria.

Bards can use the drums... and light maces + percussion skill + two-weapon fighting is a nasty-fun combination.

Bards can orate. Don't believe that's effective? Listen to the St. Crispin's Day speech (especially with a Ghost-sound provided orchestra rising the background) and don't get stirred.

Bards can do comedy. A bard who tells puns, inspiring his allies to hit people harder.

Bards can chant, and that's a freaky one. A bunch of dwarves, lead by their bard, each chanting in unison. "I wanna be a dwarven fighter/smashing orcs and other blighters."

Bards can use stringed instruments. Bards with high enough ranks in Fiddle automatically have a golden fiddle.1

More importantly, though, bards tell stories. Bards tell the stories of our adventures, they tell stories about their unending fidelity, and they tell stories about your fighters hygeine that have to be smelled to believe. What do beguilers do? It's right in the name: they lie. Beguilers lie like dogs, and cannot be trusted. They use the fact that Wizards, bereft of any remaining awesome (having spent it ALL on bards), were forced to give beguilers mechanical crutches to get around the fact that they lie and they smell funny. And carry diseases.

It is well known that bards are all fantastically endowed paragons of their gender, while beguilers are lying, disease-ridden deviates... and not even the fun kind of deviates. The kind of deviates that even make Blackguards go "That dude has something seriously wrong with him." And I'm not talking pansy blackguards. I'm talking the kind of blackguards who were paladins until they tasted their first baby and said "Yum. I think I'll eat more of these."

So play a bard. Because bards are awesome. And beguilers cheat at cards. ALL THE TIME.



1Golden fiddle not included. Offer void in certain Crystal Spheres. Consult your local overdeity for details.

Faily
2017-09-18, 01:36 PM
A Bard that impresses the dragon too much with their performance might just find themselves imprisoned for the dragon's entertainment instead. :smallbiggrin:

Why capture a princess when you can have your very own bard?

Rynjin
2017-09-20, 02:54 AM
But a bard would just laugh and perform. The bard would dance with joy. They would sing their song. They would launch into a speech that shakes everyone to the core. The bard wouldn't fight the dragon, the bard would befriend it.

The bard isn't known for overwhelming magic or impossible swordsmanship. They are known for putting on their best smile and convincing people to follow them, to believe them, to help them. The bard doesn't need a weapon or spell to win, the bard just needs a few words.....

Sadly, Diplomacy takes a minute (10 rounds) to perform, so by the time the Bard finishes their wooing, they will also be a good way toward finishing digestion as well.

https://i.imgur.com/Np2yxfD.png

Lacco
2017-09-20, 03:22 AM
This reminds me of the ancient joke about how different kinds of metal would approach the "slay dragon, save princess" quest :smallbiggrin:

Lord Raziere
2017-09-20, 07:00 AM
Bards are the best class, because your basically the groups chronicler, its personal historian in a sense- you need someone there to tell the story of the groups victories and defeats, their follies and so on. The person to make them legends when they are done with their quest. You have the charisma to make people listen and to properly praise people for the awesome job they've done.

So of course its also the best class to betray the group at the last second when the BBEG is dead, take all the credit when they get back and tell the tragic tale of how the rest of their comrades died bravely fighting the BBEG, and how their sacrifice saved them all, then enjoy being the hero afterwards.

weckar
2017-09-20, 07:41 AM
At the risk of committing a forum felony; you and Bartmanhomer should start a club.

JAL_1138
2017-09-20, 08:00 AM
But a bard would just laugh and perform. The bard would dance with joy. They would sing their song. They would launch into a speech that shakes everyone to the core. The bard wouldn't fight the dragon, the bard would befriend it.

The bard isn't known for overwhelming magic or impossible swordsmanship. They are known for putting on their best smile and convincing people to follow them, to believe them, to help them. The bard doesn't need a weapon or spell to win, the bard just needs a few words.....

In 5e, the bard might pick up the Sharpshooter feat, cast Swift Quiver, and pincushion the thing full of crossbow bolts from outside of breath-weapon range.

Or have their Simulacrum True Polymorph the bard into an Ancient Brass Dragon and fight it dragon-to-dragon, and if the bard runs out of HP in dragon form and reverts, True Polymorph themselves into yet another Ancient Brass Dragon for another go at it.

gkathellar
2017-09-20, 08:51 AM
Maybe your bard would befriend the dragon, but mine would just scream incoherently a bunch and chop off everyone's heads.

There's a reason one name for an electric guitar is "axe." Bards are metal, yo.

spinningdice
2017-09-20, 09:33 AM
Since Bards became full spellcasters in 5e they became my favourite class. The number of times I start creating a character and then think, "this would be better as a bard" is getting a little silly now.

Psyren
2017-09-20, 12:17 PM
The bard isn't known for overwhelming magic or impossible swordsmanship.

Maybe YOURS isn't :smalltongue:

ArqArturo
2017-09-20, 02:42 PM
Good thing of Bards: You can become the Party's smartass :smalltongue:

Bad thing of Bards: You are the gaming group's smartass :smallcool:

Ok, seriously. Even in 5e, you sort of have to know where your strengths will lie: Magic, or Swordplay? Because the Woo part is already covered.

Bohandas
2017-09-20, 05:29 PM
I like bards mechanically but I have difficulty seeing how the spellcasting fits in conceptually. This is because all the spells retain their normal casting time, so if it's supposed to be the obvious idea of music having a magic of it's own then most of the spells are powered by jingles

EDIT:
Actually, I could see that workig for a divine bard. All the songs could be advertisements for their deity..

JAL_1138
2017-09-20, 07:53 PM
I like bards mechanically but I have difficulty seeing how the spellcasting fits in conceptually. This is because all the spells retain their normal casting time, so if it's supposed to be the obvious idea of music having a magic of it's own then most of the spells are powered by jingles


Like so.
http://youtu.be/c2xeg7-5PYo

NecroDancer
2017-09-20, 08:38 PM
Important bard question: can you use puns to cast your magic spells and if so how long before your party abandons you?

Rynjin
2017-09-20, 08:54 PM
Important bard question: can you use puns to cast your magic spells and if so how long before your party abandons you?

Of course, though it is my good hope that they would hastily and expeditiously retreat from such a vicious mockery of the concept of "Comedy".