Rejected kids toys!!!

[Hageshi]

With the Holidays upon us I was thinking about gift ideas. Then my warped little brain started think about toys that you shouldn't be brought for kids. I'd like see how many rejected kids toys we can come up with.These toys can be real toys or ones that you make up. The reasons for being rejected can be form being to dangerous to just plan dumb. Please fallow the forums rules and have fun


Toy Dragon that breaths real fire.

Battle droid with real blaster rifle.

[AuthorGirl]

With the Holidays upon us I was thinking about gift ideas. Then my warped little brain started think about toys that you shouldn't be brought for kids. I'd like see how many rejected kids toys we can come up with.These toys can be real toys or ones that you make up. The reasons for being rejected can be form being to dangerous to just plan dumb. Please fallow the forums rules and have fun


Toy Dragon that breaths real fire.

Battle droid with real blaster raffle.

Do you mean rifle, or actually raffle? Because the second would be even worse :smallbiggrin:

[Kid Jake]

Ron Jeremy action figure with kung fu grip.
Crossed plushies with prerecorded catchphrases.
My First Straightrazor, Barber Playset.

[kgato503]

From Real Life:
I feel like the Cussing Elmo toy needs to be listed, since that actually happened, IIRC. Ditto for the old "My First Chemistry Sets" with the ingredients for things like mustard gas, and the old rock/mineral sets that contains samples of natural asbestos and uranium (among other things). Toddler's toys containing lead/cadmium (special mention for teething toys) as well. Ah, the good old days.

From Not-So-Real Life (As far as I know):
Baby's First Arson Kit (Matches, lighter, and lighter fuel included. Burning Material Sold Separate)
Exploding Marbles Set (Real glass exterior with a new and improved Nitro Glycerin interior!)
Junior Catapult (Up to 25lb Capacity!)
My Little VooDoo Doll (Pins Included. Really Works!)

[Vinyadan]

You know those little things with butterflies and bees and airplanes you put over cradles? Like that, only with live wasps.

[SaintRidley]

Well, there was the vibrating toy Nimbus 2000 broomstick that was pulled pretty quickly after becoming a hit with the teenage girl demographic.

[Mystic Muse]

How about lawn darts? :smalltongue:

All the fun of real darts, now using giant spikes instead.

[Anonymouswizard]

Well, there was the vibrating toy Nimbus 2000 broomstick that was pulled pretty quickly after becoming a hit with the teenage girl demographic.

...Is it wrong that my response to this is to want to market 'my first vibrator' sets? Because the main thing I see wrong is the toys being pulled or not being sanitary.


For the little engineer in the family, a railgun kit, complete with power source, two rails of equal length, ball bearings, and a scope.

[Scarlet Knight]

Real Major League Gnomish Baseball equipment! Autographed by "Stabs" Doogan!

[Ravens_cry]

Real Major League Gnomish Baseball equipment! Autographed by "Stabs" Doogan!

I'm not so Rusty as not to be in the company of those who got this reference.:smallbiggrin:
On the subject . . . My First Knife Juggling kit, with razor sharp blades to encourage extra fast hand-eye coordination.

[Stelio Kontos]

Cherry and chocolate flavored rubber bands.

Also, the Little Einsteins Baby's First Nuclear Energy Kit.

[Donnadogsoth]

Slingshot
Model Rocket
Chess Set
Pen Knife
Magnifying Glass
Cherry Bombs
Army Men minis
Cowboy Six Shooter
Cowboys and Indians minis
Civil War minis
Revolutionary War minis
Handcuffs
Hammer and Nails
Pack of Matches
Chemistry Set
Stretch Armstrong

[Knaight]

...Is it wrong that my response to this is to want to market 'my first vibrator' sets? Because the main thing I see wrong is the toys being pulled or not being sanitary.

Sanitation is the first thing that came to my mind too - any surface intended for internal use needs some pretty specific surfaces to avoid issues with bacteria, and that's before getting into cleaning requirements that these brooms almost certainly failed. Sepsis is not fun.

[PunsAndDragons]

Lead miniatures!

[Jay R]

Slingshot
Model Rocket
Chess Set
Pen Knife
Magnifying Glass
Cherry Bombs
Army Men minis
Cowboy Six Shooter
Cowboys and Indians minis
Civil War minis
Revolutionary War minis
Handcuffs
Hammer and Nails
Pack of Matches
Chemistry Set
Stretch Armstrong

All of which I had, and loved, as a child.

[Bohandas]

What if there was a baby doll that pooped actual poop (out of a little internal chamber that would have to be refilled from time to time)

[Knaight]

All of which I had, and loved, as a child.

All of which are also still available.

[Bohandas]

How about a My Little Pony glue-factory playset

or how about "Operation: Nazi War Atrocitoes Edition"

EDIT:

Magic Cocaine 8-Ball

Walter White Chemistry Set

Bobbleheads of famous serial killers

Pullstring doll of Albert Fish that talks about eating children

[Donnadogsoth]

How about a videogame where you steal cars and beat up hookers while murdering police officers?

Oh wait.

[Vinyadan]

How about a videogame where you steal cars and beat up hookers while murdering police officers?

Oh wait.

This, but in the "Pokémon Go" version.

[Bohandas]

Exploding Marbles Set (Real glass exterior with a new and improved Nitro Glycerin interior!)

I feel like this would work better if they were made of nitrocellulose

[Mystic Muse]

How about a videogame where you steal cars and beat up hookers while murdering police officers?

Oh wait.

You mean Grand Theft Auto, the one intended for adults, NOT children?

[Kantaki]

Considering the skit was running again a few days ago:

„We build a nuclear plant” model kit.
If you make a mistake it makes „poof” and the whole diorama falls over.
And you have a fist sized hole in the floor...

[Vinyadan]

My First Undead Horror (Flaming Edition)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKTlVIKd6hw

Also, directly from the Roman legions: lawn darts.

[Bohandas]

How about a pack of smokes

[Bohandas]

Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot, range model air rifle, with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time

[Vinyadan]

My First Jet Engine

[Anonymouswizard]

You mean Grand Theft Auto, the one intended for adults, NOT children?

While I tend to think that age ratings on various pieces of media tend to be too strict (to the point where I'm happy that the UK 12 rating* has been replaced with 12A in cinemas, to give parents more control over what's suitable), I have to agree here that the issue isn't with the game itself.

Now, I have never played a GTA game, but I did love Saint's Row 2, and I've heard the series are very similar. The problem is that, like with many other video games, parents assume that all games are for children.

I first played Dragon Age: Origins (rating 18) at 16, and it did me no harm, but this was an informed choice by the person that bought it for me. They knew that I liked that kind of game and decided that I was likely able to handle the content. Conversely my parents forbid me from seeing Alien until I was 18, because there is some disturbing stuff in there they thought I wasn't able to handle (the same with The Godfather and other films, their strategy was to wait until I was 18 and expressed interest).

The problem with gangster sandbox games isn't that they're aimed at children. Unlike some 18 rated games they tend to have storylines aimed at adults that do ask questions. It's not that they're not adequately signposted. They're generally rated as 18s and have adult oriented advertising. It's that people disregard the signposting because their child wants to play the latest Grand Theft Auto.

FWIW, I certainly don't think there's anything in SR2 that would make it bad to give to a 15 year old (depending on the exact 15 year old, there's some people in their twenties I wouldn't hand Prince of Egypt to), although I get that making it an 18 is safer and a parent always has the right to disregard the rating when buying for their kid, so in the long run it doesn't matter. Not even removing the pixelation would change my mind (my view on nudity is a bit more continental than some peoples, although I still get awkward around it in reality). Maybe the GTA games have even more disturbing stuff that merits the rating, but that's not the actual problem. The problem is that there are still many parents who think all games are for children, no matter if they're rated U, PG/8+, 12, 15, or 18. If a parent makes an informed decision that this 18 rated game is fine for their 13 year old, then that's fine. But the decisions many times aren't informed.

Yes, I did occasionally ask my mum to buy me 18 rated games when I was 15-17, just like I occasionally watched a 15 rated rated film at 13-14. My mum was probably too accepting of that, but I was never asking for games like CoD and GTA (the only example I can remember is DA2). It's not caused me any harm, but if she'd done the same thing when I was 12 I could have had problems. I also read some adult books at that age, and let me tell you that Frankenstein had more problematic stuff in it than Dragon Age 2, and yet if I walked into a bookstore at 12 and tried to buy a copy of The Reality Dysfunction (a book with some REALLY disturbing imagery) nobody would bat an eye.

This post is kind of messy, I guess my point is that compared to some stuff, GTA is not meant for children, does not try to hide that, and is adequately signposted. Therefore using it as an example of a bad kid's toy is inherently flawed, especially as it theoretically could be suitable for older children (although ones that would resent the term being applied to them). But a game that aimed itself at children but included the same stuff? A totally valid possibility that may or may not exist in reality (I don't think it does, but I could be proven wrong).

* I'm going to be using the UK rating system, the important thing is that after U and PG everything is rated as the lowest age that can legally be admitted to a cinema screening, in 3 year increments.

[Bohandas]

I'm not sure if this one is real or not

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9qv8RSreIM

[Donnadogsoth]

How about a pack of smokes

Popeye candy cigarettes?

[Bohandas]

My Morbidly Obese Pony

[Vinyadan]

My Morbidly Obese Pony

Who loves to sit on people.

[Sivarias]

Courtesy of my Father-in-Law

Curious George and the Electric Fence

The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy

And a third one that I've forgotten

[Donnadogsoth]

Courtesy of my Father-in-Law

Curious George and the Electric Fence

The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy

And a third one that I've forgotten

I had that actually.

[tomandtish]

From Real Life:
I feel like the Cussing Elmo toy needs to be listed, since that actually happened, IIRC.


Warning: In very poor taste and makes light of things that should not be made light of....

Touch Me Elmo.

For the record, I work for a Protective Services Agency. Our humor tends to be dark....

[aandy]

pop the piles

[Bohandas]

Warning: In very poor taste and makes light of things that should not be made light of....

Touch Me Elmo.

For the record, I work for a Protective Services Agency. Our humor tends to be dark....

don't you mean

Tickle-My-Pickle-Elmo

[Bohandas]

How about an Easy Bake Crackpipe or something, where you heat the rock over an old incandescent liggbulb

[ChaoticHarmony]

How about "Shut Up!" the board game? A game where the object is to sit still and be quiet the longest

[Starwulf]

While I tend to think that age ratings on various pieces of media tend to be too strict (to the point where I'm happy that the UK 12 rating* has been replaced with 12A in cinemas, to give parents more control over what's suitable), I have to agree here that the issue isn't with the game itself.

Now, I have never played a GTA game, but I did love Saint's Row 2, and I've heard the series are very similar. The problem is that, like with many other video games, parents assume that all games are for children.



I have to disagree with this statement, and quite vehemently so. This was the case with the previous generation 100%, there's no denying that. But the current generation of parents(like myself) are much more in tune with the video game market and know quite well which games are appropriate or not for our children, and it's because we grew up playing video game, In my case from the age of 5, in the case of some of my friends that aren't quite so nerdy, not until they were older and games were more mainstream. Even parents who aren't interested in video games themselves are still aware of which ones are appropriate for their kids and which ones aren't. The days of parents who buy games willy-nilly for their children without knowing if they are ok for them are over, or at the least very, very close to it. Heck, even my parents, who were one of those types that just bought games without knowing what was in them, are much more aware nowadays(mostly because they are buying for my kids and thus ask me, but that's still better than what they used to do).

[Vinyadan]

As an aside, I think that the last good GTA was GTA2. Later, the series begun taking itself too seriously.

[Bohandas]

As an aside, I think that the last good GTA was GTA2. Later, the series begun taking itself too seriously.

I agree. Personally I prefer the Postal series by Running With Scissors, as they're more in the spirit of GTA2 than the later GTA games are

[Roland St. Jude]

Sheriff: Why did y'all have to take this in a graphic sexuality/real world politics direction?