Feralgeist
2007-08-26, 05:37 AM
Okay, so i was reading frostburn, and hilarity was afoot!
So you need to be about level12th or something, whatever it is to cast 5th level spells as a wizard. the spells you'll use is ice to flesh, and shape ice. plus the 4th level spell column of ice.
First, we cast column of ice, to get a (assuming we're 12th level) 60 foot high, 10 feet diameter column of ice. Cast it again, so the same column is 120 ft (just cast it on the exact same spot.) Next, since we're VERY high up, we slowly sit down or something so we dont have to make balance checks. Cast shape ice, and make the 120 ft tall column of ice into the shape of a Colossal phallus. Now for the hard part. Start casting LOTS of ice to flesh. Since you can only affect a 3feet by 10 feet cylinder, we'll be casting it a ton of times. Make a wand if you like, to speed things up. otherwise it'll take a long time. ANYHOO, once you are standing on a massive, quivering pile of corpse-c**k chisel out some eyeholes or something on top, shove in a couple of onyx's, cast animate dead and there you go, Colossal zombie phallus slithering around at your command. Think of the fear and awe it will inspire!!
So you need to be about level12th or something, whatever it is to cast 5th level spells as a wizard. the spells you'll use is ice to flesh, and shape ice. plus the 4th level spell column of ice.
First, we cast column of ice, to get a (assuming we're 12th level) 60 foot high, 10 feet diameter column of ice. Cast it again, so the same column is 120 ft (just cast it on the exact same spot.) Next, since we're VERY high up, we slowly sit down or something so we dont have to make balance checks. Cast shape ice, and make the 120 ft tall column of ice into the shape of a Colossal phallus. Now for the hard part. Start casting LOTS of ice to flesh. Since you can only affect a 3feet by 10 feet cylinder, we'll be casting it a ton of times. Make a wand if you like, to speed things up. otherwise it'll take a long time. ANYHOO, once you are standing on a massive, quivering pile of corpse-c**k chisel out some eyeholes or something on top, shove in a couple of onyx's, cast animate dead and there you go, Colossal zombie phallus slithering around at your command. Think of the fear and awe it will inspire!!