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Alpha115
2018-02-23, 07:53 PM
So in my homebrew Setting I am making a new cleric Domain. I am looking for some feedback on this domain. I mainly wanted to give clerics a martial option similar to the blade bard, but make it less effective as a supportive caster.
Crusade Domain
Clerics of the Crusade Domain often take part in or lead in an energetic and organized campaign concerning a social, political, or religious issue. These clerics focus on this campaign, and try with all their might to complete it. Admittedly some of these campaigns may be something that a crusade domain cleric might not be able to solve in their lifetime, but any step of progress could be viewed as a success in the eyes of said clerics.
Crusade Domain Spells
1st Divine favor
3rd Magic weapon
5th Crusader’s Mantle
7th Stone skin
9th Hold Monster

Bonus Proficiencies
At 1st level you gain proficiency with martial weapons and heavy armor.

Boon of battle
From 1st level your god grants you aid in battle. Whenever you make an attack roll, you may gain a +10 bonus to hit. Once you use this feature you must finish a long rest before you can use it again.

Channel divinity: holy Blow
Starting at 2nd level, you can use your channel divinity to empower your attack. When you make a weapon attack roll, you can use your channel divinity to add 1D8 extra radiant damage to your strike. You make this choice after you see the roll, but before the DM says whether the attack hits or misses.

Channel Divinity: Unyielding strikes
Starting at 6th level, you can use your channel divinity to grant allow you to fight more ferociously in combat for up to 1 minute. While this power is active you can attack twice instead of once whenever you take the attack action on your turn.

Divine Strike
At 8th level, you gain the ability to infuse your weapon strikes with divine energy. Once on each of your turns when you hit a creature with a weapon Attack, you can cause the Attack to deal an extra 1d8 radiant damage to the target. When you reach 14th level, the extra damage increases to 2d8.

For the Crusade
Starting at 17th level, while in combat you can inspire all allies within 30-foot radius of you. Inspired allies gain one inspiration die, a D10. Once within the next minute, the creature can roll the di and add the number rolled to one attack roll, damage roll, or saving throw it makes. The creature can wait until after it rolls the D20 before using the inspiration die. Once the Inspiration die is rolled, it is lost. A creature can only have 1 Inspiration die at a time. Once you use this feature you must finish a long rest before you can use it again.

Lalliman
2018-02-24, 03:25 AM
You say you want a martial option for the cleric, but are you aware that War Domain exists? It's so similar that I question the need for this one.

Regardless, it seems a bit weak.

For one, clerics are expected to get two domain spells at each relevant level. Maybe you reduced it to one intentionally, to make them worse at casting, but then none of the other features seem to really make up for it.

Boon of Battle is useful, but I would say it's decidedly worse than War Domain's War Priest.

Holy Blow is quite bad compared to Guided Strike.

Unyielding Strikes is powerful, though I can't tell what the action cost is supposed to be. Is it an action to activate like the paladin's Sacred Weapon? That seems like the fair interpretation. If it's a non-action, then it's more powerful than any other CD option in the game. Which I guess makes up for the rest of this archetype being lukewarm, though concentrating all the power in one feature still isn't very good design.

For The Crusade is cool, no problem there.

Before I can make any further suggestions, I have to ask: What do you want this subclass to do, that the War Domain doesn't already?

Alpha115
2018-02-24, 10:55 AM
You say you want a martial option for the cleric, but are you aware that War Domain exists? It's so similar that I question the need for this one.

Regardless, it seems a bit weak.

For one, clerics are expected to get two domain spells at each relevant level. Maybe you reduced it to one intentionally, to make them worse at casting, but then none of the other features seem to really make up for it.

Boon of Battle is useful, but I would say it's decidedly worse than War Domain's War Priest.

Holy Blow is quite bad compared to Guided Strike.

Unyielding Strikes is powerful, though I can't tell what the action cost is supposed to be. Is it an action to activate like the paladin's Sacred Weapon? That seems like the fair interpretation. If it's a non-action, then it's more powerful than any other CD option in the game. Which I guess makes up for the rest of this archetype being lukewarm, though concentrating all the power in one feature still isn't very good design.

For The Crusade is cool, no problem there.

Before I can make any further suggestions, I have to ask: What do you want this subclass to do, that the War Domain doesn't already?
so quick question are you aware that the bard class has two martial classes right? The valor bard and the Blade bard. I am trying to make the crusade domain feel more like a blade bard, while the war domain has more similarities to the valor bard. I admit the class is needing some tuning and changing which is what I was trying to look for here.

One idea I had before holy Blow was to allow the crusade domain's first channel divinity to allow the Crusade domain cleric to temporarily learn a fighting style for 1 hour. However The Crusade domain cleric could only know one fighting style at a time, but could switch it. I changed it to holy blow because I was unsure how powerful my original idea was going to be.

Lalliman
2018-02-24, 12:54 PM
I am trying to make the crusade domain feel more like a blade bard, while the war domain has more similarities to the valor bard. I admit the class is needing some tuning and changing which is what I was trying to look for here.
Honestly, if you asked me, I would say that the war cleric is more like the blade bard than the valour bard. The valour bard is a melee combatant, but two out of four of its features are still for casting and support. Meanwhile the war cleric's features are focused almost entirely around making the cleric himself better at physical combat.

That being said, you can indeed go even more martial than that. If you want an even stronger focus on personal combat, I would choose features that let the crusade cleric perform more consistently in combat than the war cleric does. War domain, with its brief limited-use combat boosts (War Priest and Guided Strike) encourages you to alternate between fighting and casting. Longer-lasting combat benefits would encourage the crusade cleric to dedicate more strongly to combat, I think.

For that purpose, getting a fighting style from your CD seems like a good idea, and almost definitely not overpowered.

In the same vein, perhaps Boon of Battle could be replaced with a smaller bonus that is usable more often. E.g. get a +5 bonus on your attack roll a number of times per long rest equal to your Wisdom modifier?

I hope those are usable ideas!

Alpha115
2018-02-24, 01:03 PM
Honestly, if you asked me, I would say that the war cleric is more like the blade bard than the valour bard. The valour bard is a melee combatant, but two out of four of its features are still for casting and support. Meanwhile the war cleric's features are focused almost entirely around making the cleric himself better at physical combat.

That being said, you can indeed go even more martial than that. If you want an even stronger focus on personal combat, I would choose features that let the crusade cleric perform more consistently in combat than the war cleric does. War domain, with its brief limited-use combat boosts (War Priest and Guided Strike) encourages you to alternate between fighting and casting. Longer-lasting combat benefits would encourage the crusade cleric to dedicate more strongly to combat, I think.

For that purpose, getting a fighting style from your CD seems like a good idea, and almost definitely not overpowered.

In the same vein, perhaps Boon of Battle could be replaced with a smaller bonus that is usable more often. E.g. get a +5 bonus on your attack roll a number of times per long rest equal to your Wisdom modifier?

I hope those are usable ideas!

I actually had made a change to boon of battle to be a +5 bonus recent and made it recharge on a short rest. I do like your idea a bit more though.

Savoc
2018-02-24, 07:37 PM
i think a good idea would be to make it a more support role, but not healing as much, you see you could cast protection from disease, or poison, or fire, or temporrarely give them a higher AC or hit points
But other than that I think you should add crusaders charge, were you make a dash attack and 2 melee attacks in one turn.

Alpha115
2018-02-24, 07:47 PM
i think a good idea would be to make it a more support role, but not healing as much, you see you could cast protection from disease, or poison, or fire, or temporrarely give them a higher AC or hit points
But other than that I think you should add crusaders charge, were you make a dash attack and 2 melee attacks in one turn.

you see funny enough That's what I tend to do as a war cleric. The war cleric always felt to me as a supportive cleric, who can fight ok in a pinch. The war cleric has a few domain spells to buff allies AC, they can give temp HP with the aid spell, and improve allies damage or chance to hit.

Savoc
2018-02-25, 07:19 AM
sorry then, but still, good luck on the crusader